I cannot understand why any person looking for a serious relationship would not support the FDS 3-month for sex strategy.

baresquad · 2023-04-24T15:22:01+00:00

Because it’s stupid. I’m not even sure if it’s directed at men but I don’t need to wait for sex as proof that a relationship will work. I’m also not willing wait for someone.

I don’t believe that sex has to happen immediately but it’s extremely nonsensical to box human nature into superficial timeframes. A person can wait 3 months to have sex and suffer the same relationship failures had they fucked that person on the first date.

ashpr0ulx · 2023-04-24T17:06:45+00:00

it’s simple. i don’t wanna wait three months. i’m not setting an arbitrary rule with zero input from my emotional and sexual well-being to wait to have sex.

if i like someone, i wanna have sex as soon as i feel ready or comfortable to do so, whenever that may be. i wanna know we click in the bedroom and i don’t see a point in abstaining just to abstain

Slyfer_Seven · 2023-04-24T15:37:11+00:00

There is a physical aspect to sexual compatibility, as well as an effort/style aspect that cannot be communicated.

Sometimes the motions do not align, the angles are off, or one person just doesn't do much, making the sex unenjoyable with little chance of improvement.

It's not common, but significant enough to be wary of sinking in 3 months just to find out.

So, you can be serious about a relationship AND think 3 months is an entirely unreasonable amount of time to forgo an integral part of the relationship you're seeking...

mwb111300 · 2023-04-24T15:57:29+00:00

If she waits three months for me but not for everyone else, that makes be believe that she thinks I am “3 months less sexy” then all the rest. That’s kinda insulting and not a good start to a relationship

JNRoberts42 · 2023-04-24T16:00:11+00:00

Because we're adults and can do as we please. Because playing games is stupid. Because many of us aren't inhibited by religious or cultural restrictions. Because many of us like sex, and if a man leaves after sex he was a shit partner anyway.

Mobrowncheeks · 2023-04-24T15:58:32+00:00

Why would I try to base my relationship around sex that way? I’m not putting extreme value systems on my sex life.

So if I meet a woman who is waiting 3 months, if I keep seeing her then she can wait, but I surely will be having my sex elsewhere in the meantime,

Petyr111 · 2023-04-24T21:55:10+00:00

This post is absurd.

No-Rough-7390 · 2023-04-24T16:18:07+00:00

Greta relationships start with strong sexual attraction and compatibility. Shit like that never gets better over time.

Think of how many couples you know that have more sex now than they did a year ago, at the start of the relationship, etc. I’ll wait.

eefr · 2023-04-24T20:55:53+00:00

I wouldn't wait three months because I like sex and want to be having it when I am attracted to someone. Sometimes that turns into a long-term relationship, sometimes it doesn't... which is how dating usually goes. Some things work, some fizzle out.

When it doesn't turn into a long-term thing, that's never been because we were having sex; it's because something didn't work out between us.

Having sex with people early has never prevented me from finding long-term relationships. It's usually accelerated the speed with which both of us get attached and become serious about each other.

I've now been in a wonderful relationship for five years with a man I slept with right away. He's a real keeper, best relationship I've ever been in.

I don't date with a "strategy"; I date with an open heart and a willingness to be vulnerable.

Sabrepill · 2023-04-25T00:23:21+00:00

I recently allowed myself to date a woman for 10 dates with near zero intimacy. The experience confirmed the red pill trope that if she makes you wait, it’s never worth it. I actually simply lost interest and stopped texting her.

My best relationships have always started with intense sexual chemistry on either the first, or at the very latest second date. If it ever goes to the third date or beyond with no sexual intimacy than there is just no chemistry with modern women.

Devourer_of_felines · 2023-04-24T15:12:20+00:00

Why would anyone who wants a serious partner, in the long run, disagree with this?

Because people like getting laid. And especially when you couple this strategy with every other FDS teaching like date multiple men, well nobody’s sticking around for that mess.

MalandiBastos · 2023-04-24T15:21:27+00:00

If every woman waited 3 months+ id have no problem with it. The problem I have is even within the same woman, many will make one guy wait months when she let other guys smash much sooner.

Also, 3 months for sex is way too much investment for me esp if I knew she let another dude fuck on the first date.

Imo its asking too much from guys, you expect us to wine and dine a girl for 3 months before sex? And if she decides after 2 months and 29 days its not a fit, youre supposed to just be okay with wasting your time like that?

Nah.

Dont put all your eggs in one basket.

TheSongsInYourHead · 2023-04-24T15:19:01+00:00

Well from my understanding of how this 3-month rule works is that I'm waiting 3 months while she is having casual with someone else when she wants to.

I don't have a problem waiting 3 months or however long it takes for her to be comfortable. The problem I have is that I have a hard time believing any woman is actually waiting 3 months to have sex with a guy she actually likes. Therefore this 3 month waiting period is only being imposed because you don't respect me.

toasterchild · 2023-04-24T15:27:40+00:00

If it works for you and the people you date that's great. I wouldn't touch this person with a 10 ft pole tho. Dating is about mutual compatibility and I've never seen that from FDS stuff. Huge red flag..

Notanothrshitthrow · 2023-04-24T15:24:23+00:00

I'm all for waiting a bit before jumping into bed, but 3 months? Nah.

I'm not spending 3 months dating someone with the risk that when we finally do fuck, it's just not for me. No amount of communication will truly unveil if they're the right match for you sexually. Hell if anything, dating someone for 3 months only for things to fizzle out because they don't find you sexually compatible with them would be crushing to a lot of people.

Novadina · 2023-04-24T16:36:02+00:00

Why would anyone who wants a serious partner, in the long run, disagree with this?

What reason would I have to do it? Having sex when we are both ready and want to has always worked great for me.

96tillinfinity_ · 2023-04-24T16:51:33+00:00

There does not need to be a waiting game on sex. There are men who will wait 3 years to fuck a woman they really want and still pump and dump her. Never mind 3 months

And vice versa, there are women who break their 3 month rules all the time

The time in which it takes for sex acts to begin is not the causation for relationship success or failure although it can be correlated

WillingMirror · 2023-04-24T17:33:09+00:00

For LTR and if you don't value sex that much , then it is definitely a good strategy .
But there is still a trap there , you do not know better the person without talking about serious stuff with him/her .
Time doesn't let you know the other person so easily
It is assumed and known that good manipulator (good aka evil ,bad , whatever) can hold their mask for 3month+ , but after 3month a good portion will fail

anon018274031 · 2023-04-24T21:08:52+00:00

Because I’d be 50yrs old by the time I found anyone and that’s a tad late.

I don’t know a single man who would stick around this long (hell I know many who expect sex by the 2nd or 3rd date). Also god forbid you wait that long to found out you aren’t sexually compatible

dowehavetoreally · 2023-04-25T03:05:18+00:00

I cannot understand why a person with such an expectation should also expect to be wined and dined in high buck establishments because she's a QWEEEEEN and he needs to prove to her he's a "high value man".

How is she showing him she's a high value woman? Demanding Royal treatment?

LOL.

Three date rule boys. No play, no pay. Foodie calls are for suckers.

If she wants to be romanced for three straight months, she can be romanced at Starbucks and Mickee D's.

Besides, why take yourself off the market for three straight months and let all your leads go cold over a single woman who could be a complete disaster in the bedroom, or give you total "MEH" vibes once you see her in her birthday suit?

She's not a traditional woman. Do not give her traditional treatment.

New_Relative_8709 · 2023-04-25T03:39:32+00:00

Vayne player detected

LingonberryGood3915 · 2023-04-25T13:08:55+00:00

You technically are correct, but only if she applied that standard to all men equally in her past and doesnt have a lot of a past. otherwise it's manipulation.

also keep in mind that Im not paying for dates not on day one and not on month 3, so I have zero issue with waiting if I know she didnt fuck a dude earlier

ComfortableOk5003 · 2023-04-25T15:15:19+00:00

I can’t even take this thread seriously

NotARussianBot1984 · 2023-04-24T17:25:10+00:00

If she's a virgin, even waiting until I propose is ok.

If not, I don't wait 3 months for anyone.

SwaySh0t · 2023-04-24T15:54:08+00:00

It’s just not realistic now a days especially in the TikTok generation: People have too many options and attention spans are too short thanks to easy dopamine thru social media. Add in demographics,( let’s say for example, you live in big city) your competition might not be willing to wait as long as you and they will undersell you/ or mate poach. Women need to be reasonable, chances are he already knows you’ve slept with someone sooner( I’d even argue if she’s applying arbitrary timelines to the relationship that’s a red flag within it self, it’s also giving past trauma) no man wants to feel like a sucker, he’ll be aware that you’re making rules from him when u broke the rules for someone else.

BensonInFL · 2023-04-24T16:21:58+00:00

> I cannot understand why any person looking for a serious relationship would not support the FDS 3-month for sex strategy.

The reason you wouldn't want to make guys wait 3 months is because you will filter out all of the high value males that have many options, they will drop you once it is known that you are resistant to moving things forward, and end up with desperate men, who are more willing to jump through whatever hoops that are outside of societal norms.

-B

WowYouMustBeJoking · 2023-04-24T18:27:28+00:00

There are 2 reasons why I think this doesn't work.

IIRC the 3-month rule was presented as you go gurl get fucked by the men you like while this one guy is courting you for 3 months. Do you mean to say men should be ok with that?
This would be a reasonable rule and many men would accept it or even like it if and only if she enforced it on every man. It's not a great rule if it's a rule for me but not for another man. No man wants to feel like he's a consolation prize and is less attractive than other men she couldn't wait to jump.

Safinated · 2023-04-24T16:35:02+00:00

Sex ain’t the priority to some people. Astonishing, I know

Wide-Illustrator2906 · 2023-04-25T04:39:28+00:00

If we were in a traditional conservative society than yes it would benefit both men and women to do this but we're not. What will happen is that women will still be having short term relationships and hookups before and during the three month waiting period while waiting to have sex with her long term relationship partner. This simply doesn't work for most men.

Mr_Chad_Thunderpenis · 2023-04-25T23:52:35+00:00

If she's consistent and has done the same in the past for all the guys she was involved with, understandable and fair.

If she's not consistent and gave it away to Chad and Tyrone after a couple of beers on a slow Tuesday, then the guy who she makes wait hopefully is also keeping his peepee busy with other women while he's waiting.

midwesternMD · 2023-04-26T01:23:24+00:00

Disagree.

1) FDS is some toxic shit. I don’t think I’ve ever read anything there that was remotely balanced or reasonable

2) I like sex. I think sexual compatibility is important in sustaining a long term relationship. I’m not going to waste 3 months courting someone only to learn that she’s got all sorts of hangups about sex

3) I like sex. I want a partner who also enjoys sex. If she can go 3 months without sex without a problem, I don’t want any part of a relationship with her.

belachewhm · 2023-04-24T15:22:58+00:00

It’s 3 months for some guys while you’re having sex with other guys. And I’m expected not to have sex with anyone else. That’s stupid.

xTakki27 · 2023-04-24T15:51:57+00:00

If a guy finds out, that he's the only one confronted with such a hold, while any HVM got to smash on Day 1, he obviously would be pissed.

Also - anything from FDS should be abhored as much as Blackpilled thinking tbh

KissMyAsthma-99 · 2023-04-24T18:45:04+00:00

I 100% agree, so long as the woman does this exact strategy for EVERY man she sleeps with. So, does that fit within your post? If not, I follow with...

If she doesn't, she's just a manipulative hypocrite looking for a long term sucker that she doesn't truly care about. His emotions don't matter to her, she's only valuing hers. Hopefully, you'd agree that's wrong.

Petyr111 · 2023-04-24T21:59:14+00:00

Body from normal girls aren't so valuable to deserve 3 long month's of wasting energy, time and bulshit. It is an horrible investment with no guarantee of return. 3 months of wasting time and paying food for the girl is not easy.

ragman75 · 2023-04-24T22:09:21+00:00

its a terrible idea becuase most women do not offer enough to make a guy wait

Sofia_sticated91 · 2023-04-24T15:21:17+00:00

3 months? Lmao. I walk out of there's no physical aspect by the end of the second date. If she is very hot, I will accept handholding and kissing. Less hot -> make out.

But if there's is nothing by the end of the second date, I am wasting my time.

EulenWatcher · 2023-04-24T15:12:50+00:00

Why do people have to wait a set amount of time to have sex? Also if you aren’t compatible sexually, wasting 3 months is less than ideal. I totally support the idea of waiting as long as you need to feel comfortable and secure to have sex, but I don’t think it has to be a set period of time.

TurtleDickSlap · 2023-04-24T16:11:12+00:00

Because it's stupid.

You're expecting me to provide three months of courtship while you deny me sex, a thing you've more than likely freely given to other men for less?

Yeah, kick rocks.

gofigure62 · 2023-04-24T16:35:46+00:00

They don't trust any woman that they meet. They think every woman is a lying whore that's getting fucked ever hour on the hour by every Chad within a 40 mile radius.

They also believe that if a woman fucked one guy for whatever reason on the first night or first week, she then has to fuck every other man that she comes across for all eternity.

These people don't care about anything sane let alone rational. They just want to strong arm women into having sex as fast as possible and as soon as possible because they just want to fuck. They have no interest in having long term relationships, they just settle for being in a relationship because it's easier to manipulate sex out of women who something long term, than it is to have the organic social skills to integrate into the sub culture of men and women that fuck strangers all of the time.

They'll make up whatever imaginary justification they can to manipulate sex out of people. They think every woman is a whore and that he deserves access to a whores vagina whenever he wants. There is zero respect or value towards the woman, they just want to fuck.

bigdaveyl · 2023-04-24T22:42:40+00:00

There's a few issues.

Most women don't offer enough to keep someone interested.

The FDS rule is selectively applied, make the LTR men wait but if you happen to find someone who is not LTR material, you don't have to make them wait. In other words, the rule should be equally applied to everyone.

Apprehensive_Boat_70 · 2023-04-24T15:49:31+00:00

I support it but i only with virgin or low n women who have never slept with anyone before 3 months, problem?

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onirroc · 2023-04-24T15:12:25+00:00

I don't like artificial rules. If the chemistry is there and we are both horny we should have sex. I don't like the idea of being made to wait just as a test.

roger61962 · 2023-04-24T15:20:02+00:00

If you like your rules - go 4 it.

Not my rules. Not my way.

Anxious-Tailor-7182 · 2023-04-24T17:56:54+00:00

Because you never look for specific form of relationships. You don't know and don't have a way to know how relationships are going to progress. And if you behave like somebody else you'll end with wrong girl.

RocinanteCoffee · 2023-04-26T08:56:38+00:00

Arbitrary time frames are ridiculous. It takes time to get to know someone but sometimes you feel safe enough with them and there is mutual chemistry and you both agree to safety precautions and have access to a private space so sex early on is an option.

Sometimes you date a strong silent type and it takes a lot more time to get to know him because he's more reticent... so you may still feel a spark but it takes longer to build trust or to glean if he feels a "spark" for you.

There's no timeline. Every dynamic is going to be a little different, logistics change too. Last time you dated you might have just had one 40 hour/week job. Now you have one 50 hour/week job and two side hustles. So it takes more time to have more dates.

No two situations will be exactly like one another and no two people are exactly like two other people. Trying to rush or slow down based on some strict schedule is ridiculous.

Mandy_M87 · 2023-04-26T13:48:13+00:00

I used to think like that, but it doesn't really make sense to set a specific time frame, just do it when you are ready to.

Cupcakelover1985 · 2023-04-26T14:14:58+00:00

It’s because it’s disadvantageous to mens sexual strategy. Which is to sleep with a many women as possible with a little investment as possible(whether that investment is monetary, time or emotional).

Waiting to see if you and the person are actually compatible in terms of values, goals, love languages etc before muddying the waters with sexual confusion makes it harder to do the aforementioned.

rootsnyder · 2023-04-27T09:08:39+00:00

Lol 😂.

That strategy is basically a full force recipe for never finding a man of quality. Its absolute insanity.

gymbronyc718 · 2023-05-02T18:41:34+00:00

Instead of trying to manipulate men into staying with you because they already invested time and effort, why don't you focus on becoming an interesting and charming woman of quality that men would want to spend time with because of you? And not because you making them wait for sex.

I cannot understand why any person looking for a serious relationship would not support the FDS 3-month for sex strategy.

Comments

SHE IS FREE TO GO DATE OTHER MEN

Title	I cannot understand why any person looking for a serious relationship would not support the FDS 3-month for sex strategy.
Author	AFuzzyMuffin
Upvotes	10
Comments	456
Date	April 24, 2023 3:08 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/12xjuf5/i_cannot_understand_why_any_person_looking_for_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/i-cannot-understand-why-any-person-looking-for-a.1216689 https://theredarchive.com/post/1216689