What do women like about going out on a date?

Siukslinis_acc · 2025-10-30T18:15:36+00:00

Isn't it like a hangout, but with romantic intentions?

You get to know the other person and are shown different perspectives.

No_Teacher_3313 · 2025-10-30T18:42:03+00:00

I like to get to know someone and see if we’re compatible.

It’s really not that much effort. Ask what days she’s available and suggest a cafe. It’s not high effort. She’ll get herself there and home. I have no idea why you think there is so much work involved.

If you aren’t liking the opportunity to get to know her, why are YOU going on the date? Are you just wanting sex?

JustGeminiThings · 2025-10-30T18:34:44+00:00

I like going out in general. Festivals, fairs, restaurants, nice bars, sitting on a patio and chatting. Window shopping, listening to music. Gardens, museums, galleries. I also suggest date activities and plan some dates. All a first date needs is an agreeable activity and location. Enjoyable company and getting to know someone is really the focus. There's no real substitute to doing that in person, and you can actually get energy from being out in the world, or at the very least you experience how someone moves, metaphorically and literally, when you are out in the world with them.

VexingTetrimino · 2025-10-30T19:57:01+00:00

making personal connections, going on an adventure

ChadChasingBReturns · 2025-10-30T18:30:28+00:00

I love good dates!! My husband and I still go on dates. What’s not to like about going out with a person that you want to know more about? What’s not to like about romance?

justdontsashay · 2025-10-30T18:16:29+00:00

Hey women, why do you like dates? No, not that reason. Or that one. Come up with a different reason!

What answer are you looking for here?

To get to know someone we have to spend time with them. Meeting somewhere public and doing an activity or having a meal together seems like the logical choice, are you thinking we should just show up alone at some guy’s house?

anna_alabama · 2025-10-30T18:18:03+00:00

The possibility of meeting your soulmate. I don’t have experience dating, but the night I met my husband he took me out on a date. Now I can look back on that night and remember the anticipation, the nerves/excitement, the possibility of meeting the one, the conversation, etc. All of it was so exciting because it was the starting point of our entire relationship.

attendquoi · 2025-10-30T18:20:46+00:00

They're fun 🤷🏻‍♀️ but also I don't date strangers, so there usually isn't any awkwardness.

Suspicious_Glove7365 · 2025-10-30T18:26:27+00:00

I don’t understand what’s so confusing about this. Women go out on dates to see if the man they are meeting is someone they’d want to date. That’s the appeal. Do I as an introvert love the idea of meeting a stranger? No. But if I want a boyfriend, that’s what i have to do.

AngeAware · 2025-10-30T18:20:54+00:00

People get way too hung up on the word "date" itself. Seriously, call a meeting between two mutually romantically interested people to get to know each other better and gage their compatibility whatever you want. I'm gonna call it a date.

Why do I like dates? Well I don't automatically like them, a date can be good or bad or somewhere in-between. If I'm agreeing to the date in the first place I think there's something special about this guy and I like having the chance to get to know him better. Is it gonna work out? Who the fuck knows. But you probably won't know for sure until you go on a few dates.

ThatBitchA · 2025-10-30T21:17:47+00:00

If men don't see an upside to hanging out with a woman they are interested, they should probably stop pursuing women and just pay for sex.

This seems to reinforce that men don't care about women as people. They only care to get their dick wet.

Generally, people like hanging out with the person they are dating.

Relationships are 90% hanging out together. And 10% having sex.

wayna00 · 2025-10-30T18:30:19+00:00

getting ready tbh then I'll have a story to tell

ladybird_00 · 2025-10-30T19:09:32+00:00

Flirting and banter

2025-10-30T18:41:32+00:00

You don't want us to answer with a response about getting dolled up and seeing new things?

Honestly feeling pretty, valued, relaxed, and served good food like royalty is a fucking valid feeling to enjoy when going out. Some of the same things we enjoy going out with friends - although feeling pretty in a 'we are actually attracted to each other' way and feeling valued in a 'we can see maybe making a family together and retiring together' kind of way is usually more specific to dating.

Going out in a sharp suit looking good with a hot lady and being served good food is nice for men, too, right? And enjoying being with that woman IS the specific to dating part.

So do you not like, enjoy going to get beer and wings and watch the game with the boys at least every now and then? Are these not things men do? Now a certain type of man may not be so into the suits, I guess, but they can still HAVE that sort of date at a game or pizzeria. I really like pizza lol. Anyways don't men enjoy doing, like, activities at different places occasionally? Aren't we all social people? I know it's harder these days to socialize, but if you can try it, yes it's typically known as fun.

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Odd-Mastodon1212 · 2025-10-31T15:40:13+00:00

I saw an episode of Comedians In Cars Getting Coffee with Jerry Seinfeld and another comedian. I can’t remember the guy’s name bc I was unimpressed. He whined that “Women only like gifts from a man if they were inconvenient to get. You have to go to the florist. You can’t just buy her a rose at the restaurant.” His tone was just shitty. Seinfeld looked at him incredulously and said, “BECAUSE she’s deciding if she might want to have your baby someday. She’s looking to see what YOU GOT.” He meant effort. Can you bring it?

I don’t always like his humor or agree with all of his smug old man opinions,but I was like thank god someone gets it. A man who is lazy and cheap with you in the beginning with be cheap with you emotionally. My husband’s dad told him, “treat your dates with the same care you would treat your cherished wife.” It works. That doesn’t mean you can’t just meet for coffee, but the resentment is reallllly unattractive.

Lemon_gecko · 2025-10-30T18:56:33+00:00

I'm genuinely thinking that men shouldn't date if they think like that.

To answer your question. I get to know a person and maybe it will be interesting. There were dates when i realized we were not compatible really but we still had fun time together, the conversation was interesting, i learned something, all in all no hard feelings.

Then if there is a spark i enjoy flirtation, i like this social dance, i like escalating things and watch them being happy and surprised as hell lol. i like teasing. I like human touch. I like feeling that there will be something good later.

And i like to keep my dates casual because i don't like to be dolled up.

Avast_Lion · 2025-10-30T20:00:18+00:00

Hanging out with someone who is fun to talk to. If they're not fun to talk to, I don't like the date.

stockingsinrainboots · 2025-10-30T20:31:22+00:00

I intentionally have only dated people who are more enthusiastic about dates than me. What do I like? Exploring and forming memories with a person I love.

P1anth0 · 2025-10-30T21:46:58+00:00

I liked talking to guys and getting to know them. If I was friends with them beforehand it was just another fun thing we did together before committing. Also the way you think feels jaded and not reflective of men I dated I could tell they were having a good time also.

Beer4Blastoise · 2025-10-30T23:28:52+00:00

My husband and I go on dates as often as we can. What’s not to like? You get to try a new restaurant or activity and spend time together.

Novadina · 2025-10-31T08:05:28+00:00

I enjoy hanging out with people I like, or getting to know people I think I might like, and doing something fun with them. It can be exciting to get to know someone and learning we have compatibilities and might want to have more dates.

What I'm looking for is what in the whole process do you get out of it? Describe feelings. Emotions. What is rewarding about it?

Well for the first date with my husband, he took me on a day trip to another city, which is a fun trip to make people do sometimes in my city, as they have great food and also it’s fun to go somewhere else sometimes. He took me to the zoo, and I enjoy zoos because I like animals, and I liked him, so it was cool he liked the same things, and it was very exciting when he held my hand and I felt the spark. Then he took me to the bookstore and we picked out sci-fi books together, and that was nice because I like bookstores and sci-fi books, and again, it was cool he liked the same things. Then we ate some tasty food and that was nice because food that tastes good is enjoyable for humans. My emotions were things like pleasure in things I like, enjoyment with him having good conversation, and excitement over having shared interests and our relationship turning romantic, excitement that maybe he was “the one”…

He definitely enjoyed the date also, because he also likes animals, sci-fi books, and tasty food, it’s not something he pretends to like for me, lol, he did these things before he even knew me. And because we enjoyed the first date so much we make it a point to go back to that city occasionally and do it again!

Other fun dates we have done are go see a movie, or go out to eat, or go on a hike, or go to the shooting range, or go to a museum, or go to a car show, or go to the state fair, or go kayaking, or go to music events, or go to local outdoor markets, or going to a haunted house, or going to a firework show, or going to a house party, or going to the arcade… Just fun things to do together, doesn’t seem complicated to understand…

-Pixxell- · 2025-10-31T08:36:29+00:00

I like spending time and making nice memories with the person I care about?? We both get to dress up and treat ourselves/each other to a nice night out. What’s not to like?

If it’s a new person I’m dating it’s a way to do something fun and break the ice a bit in a neutral place.

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2025-10-31T09:48:05+00:00

I’m like having that one to one time with my husband with no distractions from the children the house etc.

He is my best friend I love just being with him, it’s also important to us both to stay connected as our lives are so busy.

I love dressing up for him too so he can remember I can look good not just work clothes and pjs 😂

Objective_Ad_6265 · 2025-10-31T12:09:20+00:00

To find the person I love or already in the relatiosnhip to spend time with him. It's about HIM, not about the process or something...

Different_Cress7369 · 2025-11-02T07:43:23+00:00

I liked the rush of adrenaline before heading out, and the getting to know someone new. I was also keen to do outside stuff for dates, and a trip to the beach is good no matter who you go with.

Cute_Bear_4154 · 2025-10-30T18:59:17+00:00

The fun part is you and getting to know you.

Do not do anything for a stranger you feel like you need to attach hidden conditions to: if you can’t pay for a dinner without expecting sex in return, do NOT do it. Get a coffee. If getting a coffee and forgetting about it feels too much, you are either not in a position to date because you are starving, or you don’t like the woman. If it feels like a huge amount of effort to do everything that you are describing, if it feels like a chore, if it feels like you are just there to get to the final part - you are overinvesting in her.

The worst thing you can do is overinvest in a woman. It’s exclusively bad things that will happen.

Lysa_Bell · 2025-10-30T19:35:21+00:00

Im now married. But I still go on dates with my husband. And we split the bill and everything. Although I enjoy when he treats me. When he puts in effort to show me he appreciates me, he wants to spend time with me, look at me, talk to me. Its intimate. It gives me butterflies. It fills my emotional buckets to be romantic with my husband. Which in turn is like foreplay for me. It makes me want to rip his clothes off when we get home. Its like mental and emotional foreplay. I need it to feel intimate with him. Sometimes our dates are just us watching a movie at home and cuddle. But I need different stimulation on a regular basis. Nothing is worse than monotony.

ResponsibilityAny217 · 2025-10-30T19:24:09+00:00

I like setting time aside to get to know/get comfortable with the guy in a explicitly clear romantic setting. I know this is a date , I know this is romantic. It's very clear/securing and calming.

Personally all my relationship have started with warm approaches so guys I've met at school, church, work or mutual friends etc.

So often we would hang out before (often in groups ) officially dating but I didn't think of it as romantic or intentional.

I thought of it as something cool to do to pass the time ? While for going on a official date it was closer to I have intentionally made these plans to be with only you in a romantic setting.

kmb218 · 2025-10-30T20:10:09+00:00

It’s very similar to what I would get out hanging out with a friend. A date is just getting out of the house and doing fun things with a person you like. I find interacting with other humans and doing activities with them enjoyable.

In the case of a date rather than a friend hangout it’s even better since there is sexual tension, kissing potentially etc. This is enjoyable by itself and also makes any potencial sex much better.

I am curious, do you generally not hang out with your friends? But if yes, what makes it different /better from a date? Do you generally date people you dislike hanging out with?

cb8585b · 2025-10-30T18:52:43+00:00

I used to go on dates with men so that I could gather new content for the group chat. No other reason obviously.

Makuta_Servaela · 2025-10-30T20:48:08+00:00

Getting to know the person, doing something with them, getting out of the house in general, being a member of a social species, etc.

What I'm looking for is what in the whole process do you get out of it?

It's literally that. The whole process. The whole process is a variant of social and emotional connection, which produces oxytocin.

Temporary-Flight-192 · 2025-10-30T20:50:14+00:00

To be honest, most men really do not like going out on most dates.

Even if it’s 50/50 or ridiculously cheap? I don’t understand. You don’t like to go to events and eat at restaurants? Hopefully doing it with someone you find attractive and maybe get to have sex with later? That’s a bad time for you?

Nellylocheadbean · 2025-10-31T00:54:23+00:00

It’s fun. Meeting new ppl/learning about new ppl is fun. Trying out restaurants and activities with someone you have romantic intentions for is fun. Then while you’re on the date, there’s flirting, banter and escalation, sometimes you get butterflies. The whole experience can be exhilarating.

Blacktransjanny · 2025-10-31T03:34:54+00:00

Lifestyle subsidies. Once you've got that golden mindset about having no qualms getting free dates and dinners from men you'll never see again it's a nice perk you can tap for a couple years. Can easily add up to the equivalent of $10-15,000 where I live without needing to be a supermodel for the rich whales.

Title	What do women like about going out on a date?
Author	ClevelandSpigot
Upvotes	20
Comments	106
Date	October 30, 2025 6:08 PM UTC (8 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1ok73gx/what_do_women_like_about_going_out_on_a_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-do-women-like-about-going-out-on-a-date.1565386 https://theredarchive.com/post/1565386

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