This bio is sad

FabledAngryVillager · 2021-05-12T06:47:40+00:00

Serious relationships only, but no marriage... So, bangmaid?

Too many caps screams anger issues.

_jellybeanqueen_ · 2021-05-12T06:45:18+00:00

I'm looking for a FEMALE so I can WASTE her time in a SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP but WON'T MARRY HER EVER. She has to UPROOT her entire life FOR ME, a FUTURE POLICE OFFICER in KANSAS CITY who GAMES and watches ANIME no EXCEPTIONS. In return she gets NOTHING but ABUSE because I CLEARLY HAVE ISSUES I need to OFFLOAD to my HOT FOREVER GIRLFRIEND

spinsterchachkies · 2021-05-12T06:59:17+00:00

So you’re supposed to face time him while he ignores you and plays video games. And move with him to Kansas City YEEE HAWW so he can be a cop. But he won’t marry you. So what’s in this relationship for you? Like is he at least hot with a big dick? Doubt it

LevellingUpTime · 2021-05-12T07:01:12+00:00

It's like poetry. After all the talk about not marrying but being serious anyway, being a gamer boy who wants an audience (thot), wanting to become a police officer (jobless at the moment?), moving to Kansas... the very last line "I love watching anime" in lower caps, is just *chef's kiss* mwah! Perfect. Encapsulates the whole vibe

PurpyPops · 2021-05-12T08:52:02+00:00

How many flags would a red flag, flag, if a red flag could flag red? 🚩🚩🚩🚩

Papaverinum · 2021-05-12T07:33:14+00:00

"I GOT NO TIMES FOR GAMES!" & "I play video games..." 🤔🤔🤔🤔

Fatt3stAveng3r · 2021-05-12T09:10:29+00:00

How can you put a future job as your occupation? Especially when it sounds aspirational and not like "I'm moving to Kansas City in a month for my new job".

He might as well put future astronaut. Lol.

Guyincognito9876 · 2021-05-12T07:03:44+00:00

Then he whines that he never gets any matches and “females are too picky”!

PBJellyNutella · 2021-05-12T09:15:03+00:00

Honestly what’s the use of dating this guy? What is he bringing to the table? Jesus entitled losers like this makes my blood boil

sassyheather · 2021-05-12T07:32:53+00:00

Who’s gonna tell him that marriage is as serious as relationships get? Men are dumb ugh

little_sparrow152 · 2021-05-12T07:35:00+00:00

"Be consistent" aka "I got neither the time nor effort to try and understand anything you do, feel or think and expect you to be on demand available, always, unless I don't want to"

GodILoveTheEnglish · 2021-05-12T08:35:30+00:00

"Future Police Officer"
"Straight Man"
"Never Getting Married"
"I play video games"
"I love watching anime"

Damn! He hit the scrote bingo!

CuntWaffe · 2021-05-12T09:21:36+00:00

"Be consistent" He can't even be consistent with his typing.

pinkcityscape · 2021-05-12T09:34:25+00:00

Whenever people type in capitals I just assume they are screaming and it’s really off putting. Why is he so angry?

Extreme-Vermicelli · 2021-05-12T07:44:04+00:00

What a catch

sleutherino · 2021-05-12T07:02:20+00:00

Sooo... He wants somebody to uproot, isolate, and abuse? Judging off the way this bio written, I have a hunch that this person gets easily angered. So, ofc they're trying to be a cop, fitting.

Which will make the abuse even less escapable when you decide to ditch him and leave. He'll be a cop and have cop friends, so they can harrass you even after you leave his sorry ass.

Serious relationship, but no marriage. Aka a bangmaid to cook, clean, and fuck him. All while he watches anime, which is almost surely code for hentai porn.

MisandryFTW · 2021-05-12T13:16:24+00:00

The rates of domestic abuse among police officers in the US are terrifying. If you date a police officer be careful. His position can also make it dangerous to leave an abusive situation.

betsybasset · 2021-05-12T07:03:05+00:00

I bet he'll pass the police entrance exam.

With that self centredness.

Me me me 🙄

Yellowsunflowerlover · 2021-05-12T13:21:21+00:00

He sounds aggressive and controlling. Makes sense why he wants to be a cop.

AcademicMobile1 · 2021-05-12T12:52:12+00:00

Future police officer, then Kansas City were all the red flags I needed

TVsFrankismyDad · 2021-05-12T12:57:18+00:00

Bet this guy whines all over Reddit about how he never gets any matches and dating apps suck for men.

Maingurl · 2021-05-12T18:00:18+00:00

Kansas city girls watch out!🤣

AlextheAnalyst · 2021-05-12T10:38:04+00:00

What does, "if we can't ft while I play" mean? Closer to the bottom of his tirade, in lower case.

steeped_tea123 · 2021-05-12T15:43:52+00:00

"Future police officer".....

NEXT!

throwaway32132134 · 2021-05-12T11:55:43+00:00

I'm confused with some of the words he chose to capitalize... Lool like can you imagine hearing someone say this bio out loud it would sound hilarious. 😂 "I want to be a * says it loudly, because that's how it reads* POLICE OFFICER in * says loudly again* KANSAS CITY. Or even * says loudly I GOT NO TIME FOR GAMES. Be consistent. 😂

nonchalance77 · 2021-05-12T13:17:31+00:00

Forever alone and hopefully out of the gene pool forever.

Fiebre · 2021-05-12T14:56:55+00:00

Could've stopped at future police officer. Shit's waaaay too risky.

ItsFreezen · 2021-05-12T13:57:00+00:00

This Scrote has anger issues.

RabidWench · 2021-05-12T16:53:03+00:00

Excuse me, is there a flair for "all the red flags"?

veruscka · 2021-05-12T20:17:41+00:00

Future Police Officer at Kansas City Kansas

Lmao.

Suspicious-Leg-1407 · 2021-05-12T10:12:29+00:00

Well that looks like a red flag party.

Anime interest almost always comes with a side salad of pedo porn.

Blackbeakvesta · 2021-05-12T09:18:27+00:00

Anime and also manga seriously creeps me out!!

tldrjane · 2021-05-12T12:51:07+00:00

Gross

freelancepsychic · 2021-05-12T16:04:55+00:00

How much you wanna bet he hasn't even applied for police training

janeaustenfan99 · 2021-05-12T19:36:43+00:00

So he wants a longterm, live in sex doll

kangaskhaniscubones · 2021-05-12T20:24:29+00:00

This guy is definitely unattractive hahaha

Cultural_Training249 · 2021-05-12T20:51:24+00:00

Oh my gosh. The audacity of this profile is beyond shocking. How can you be so comfortable with being an underachieving bum?

throw_away_oranges · 2021-05-12T10:48:08+00:00

The part where it indicates this is a man is cut off and at first glance I thought “wow she has unique interests!”.

sassenachpants · 2021-05-12T16:28:08+00:00

The lack of self awareness is blinding.

Interesting_Day1188 · 2021-05-12T17:19:25+00:00

I see the word Anime and I know he's immediately a swipe left.

Jaelismyhomegirl · 2021-05-12T22:01:22+00:00

Every line gets worse! And no punctuation!

lskfjd743 · 2021-05-13T14:12:12+00:00

You know at least he's honest about the fact that he's trash...it makes it easier to weed them all out!

Nice_Pass2393 · 2021-05-12T13:48:30+00:00

He had to mention FaceTime because he promotes for apple products like many guys on old

iamwildflowers · 2021-05-12T16:03:46+00:00

What a catch 😎

lolmemberberries · 2021-05-13T02:31:56+00:00

So many red flags.

Content-Floor · 2021-05-13T16:04:22+00:00

This dude is a pathetic and lazy gamer. Obviously, it takes NOTHING to become a police officer so why isn’t he doing it. However, I think we’re better off if he doesn’t become one because he seems like he has issues with power and being controlling and lord knows we don’t need another one of those in the force.

Jaelismyhomegirl · 2021-05-13T05:52:22+00:00

Imagine this being said out loud, but for every capitalized word, his voice gets higher pitched.

Nice_Pass2393 · 2021-05-12T13:07:18+00:00

This guy works for IPhone. I could tell by the FaceTime references. I see a lot of these influencers on old but I refuse to have a conversation unless it's in person

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2021-05-12T16:14:34+00:00

[removed]

N2Gen · 2021-05-13T05:34:30+00:00

What a catch lol

disillusionedideals · 2021-05-15T04:35:08+00:00

Wow, he sounds unnecessarily hostile...that's a lot of caps in his profile :-)

Title	This bio is sad
Author	doobidoobidooba
Upvotes	530
Comments	111
Date	May 12, 2021 6:36 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/nai9ks/this_bio_is_sad/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/this-bio-is-sad.757539 https://theredarchive.com/post/757539

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