Men's anger towards women is misplaced: it should be towards other better men

02012 · 2023-01-12T15:53:29+00:00

Nah, they should be angry at the system that dissolves all communities and atomises entire society, commodifies every public space, forcing them to try finding love on apps whose business model is to keep their userbase lonely and desperate.

Vyrnoa · 2023-01-12T16:03:32+00:00

Damn lol. Imagine being this close to discovering whats actually the cause of these issues and STILL missing it.

You shouldnt be aiming your anger towards women. Or men. This is going to sound like a classic. For a reason. You should be only mad against the system. Dont hate the player hate the game kind of thing. We all do what we can to survive and thrive in a system were under.

Im sure someone with a sociology degree would have much to say about this much better than i can put it in words. But you cannot dismantle a system by attacking the "victims" of it. Aim up.

Edit. To give an example to your last statement. Why are you to blame someone who worked harder than you did? Or just did better regardless. Why not go straight to the root of the issue and say why are students not given enough opportunities to succeed.

UpbeatInsurance5358 · 2023-01-12T16:07:34+00:00

They should be angry at a society that literally tells them that having a woman is the main goal in life, and that they're less of a man for not having sex, which is absolute bullshit and a ridiculous amount of pressure to put a man under. It fucks everyone up.

CopperknickersII · 2023-01-12T16:11:36+00:00

I'm not going to insult women like some others here. But I am going to stand up for myself - the fact is that your so-called 'superior options' are not actually superior. Women by and large are far happier with regular guys than gym-dwelling f*boys. Above average guys are attractive mainly because of traits indicative of physical strength and good health, which are totally irrelevant markers of a good partner in the modern world of office jobs and universal healthcare.

I'm a far better partner than most of the guys on Tinder, and anyone who takes the trouble to look past my ectomorphic physique and facial asymmetry will easily see that. I probably would have struggled to kill a mammoth back in the old days, but I can look my girlfriend's dad in the eye, hold down a job, and buy flowers on Valentine's, which is more than can be said for any of my girlfriends' movie star-looking exes.

geyges1 · 2023-01-12T15:54:16+00:00

First, Women choose men. Since women make the choice, there's no reason to be upset with the guy.

Second, If she stays with him forever and lives happily ever after then nobody gives a single shit.

However if the relationship lasts 3 months and ends in a disastrous breakup, or even worse: a divorce, then was that man really "BEST" for her? Was he really superior?

Or are her decision making skills impaired because she's totally shit at vetting character before spreading her legs?

Remandergrowth · 2023-01-12T16:05:53+00:00

Mens' anger is more placed on the fact that the female criteria for relationships is poor.

If a man lost to a rich, attractive, and responsible man, most men would acknowledge they were not better and accept it.

However, in most cases, men lose to men who are irresponsible reckless and damaging to the woman who choose them. And then they are blamed for the damage done by the women's poor choice.

If women were operating based on appropriate criteria, most men would be fine. But height money and toxicity have no bearing on a man's ability to love and take care of you or your possible child.

lle-ell · 2023-01-12T16:26:25+00:00

Are you also angry at people with a higher IQ who make more money than you?

obviousredflag · 2023-01-12T16:32:10+00:00

it's more the frustration of realizing that life is not fair. Other men have lots of casual sex and get the wives they want and find attractive. "Women can pick from hundreds of men" and can have sex with whomever they want, every day of the year. Also, women do not have to provide anything to be loved and desired.

And the poor man, doesn't get sex, doesn't get relationships with the women he finds attractive, doesn't get loved unconditionally but needs to provide more than he can, just to be seen as a human being.

The only reason we are not seeing social justice activists and protests on the streets is that those guys know very well that this cannot be made fair. In their despair, they go to the only place they have left: THE WALL, payback time. Once the women hit 30 and want to settle down with them for family building reasons, THEY will have the power and they are so going to reject them.

None0fYour8usiness · 2023-01-12T16:05:40+00:00

Men know they're in competition with eachother.

Women are the ones that think they're entitled to a 10 while being 4 or 5.

SolidusMonkey · 2023-01-12T17:23:24+00:00

OP, you took a really long time to just basically say "incel uprising when???". Just saying.

chancetolive · 2023-01-12T16:51:59+00:00

Not angry at anyone.

Not women because they're following their evolved imperative
Not at men because they're looking out for themselves
Not at parents because they did what they knew and weren't purposely sabotaging.
Not at society because the rules are created over time to benefit as many people as possible. There's always downsides.
Not at evolution because it just is. A battle of immortality between single celled and multicell organisms
Not at God because I'm powerless anyway if he's a sadist.
Not at my younger self because he just wanted to be okay and have a good time.

I'm angry at you OP. For being so cute

draiki13 · 2023-01-12T16:48:58+00:00

Your entire argument is based on the assumption that a woman’s decision making is flawless.

What you’re forgetting to add is “thinks”. She thinks that she has a superior option available.

And that allegedly “superior” man did not out-compete me because there was no competition because that man doesn’t exist. However genetically “superior” you are in her mind there’s always someone better for her because most women base their value off of the men they date.

She’s dating an 8, there’s a 9 out there for her. She switches up to a 9 there’s a 10 out there for her. She switches up to a 10 there’s a lot 10.1 out there for her. You see how this is an endless cycle.

mrcs84usn · 2023-01-12T17:03:30+00:00

Better men in what way? An AF man might be hotter and better in bed, but a BB man might have his shit together better and would be more aligned with her life goals.

Barneysparky · 2023-01-12T17:30:20+00:00

Most of the young women I work with are just working and trying to make rent.

TheDustLord · 2023-01-12T17:38:46+00:00

Couldn’t I use this to justify cheating on my girlfriend? I could just say

Sorry honey, you just got outcompeted! But don’t be angry at me, be angry at the woman I cheated with! Wanting the best for myself is perfectly fine!

BaldOprah · 2023-01-12T23:03:36+00:00

Women's anger towards men is misplaced: it should be towards other better women

Lord_Thanos · 2023-01-13T00:08:16+00:00

I only consider someone superior to me if they’re smarter and more competent than me.

RocinanteCoffee · 2023-01-12T18:44:05+00:00

Why does anger have to be involved at all? People should be adults and not resent someone else's success or be hostile that they have the power to consent/reject someone.

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2023-01-12T20:05:28+00:00

But the reality why she rejected you is because she has a superior option available

This again....Guys, women don't always say ''no'' to dating you because there's someone better waiting in the wings. Often, there's nobody else, they just think being single is better than being with you. I get it, it probably feels a lot better to think ''she didn't want me because there was someone better than me'', rather than to think ''she didn't want me because being alone is better than being with me'', but women would happily choose to not date someone they're not interested in.

A man superior to you out-competed you for the same woman. That is who you should be angry at. Same situation for the college you didn't get in, or job that you wanted -- someone ELSE out-competed you and took your spot.

But why be angry at that person? We're not talking about people getting a spot at a uni or a job because they're rich/connected/their parents got it for them, I'd get being mad about that. But if a person was actually better than you - they worked harder, they got better grades, they have more skills than you, why are you mad at them for just being better? Why not channel that energy into improving yourself, rather than being bitter that someone else is better?

AstronautLoveShack · 2023-01-12T16:10:58+00:00

Why should they be angry at all? If you run a race and lose, are you mad at the person who won? Are you mad at the race track? Or do you just think, "I'll train harder and try again next year"? Or maybe just decide running isn't for you and quit.

Spiritogre · 2023-01-12T15:51:32+00:00

The opposite is the same. All the entitled overweight ugly women who think they earn a handsome rich guy is baffling. Men in general care way less and are way less entitled. Unless they have all the options, of course.

No_Reflection_798 · 2023-01-12T16:13:01+00:00

Men typically don't get angry out of jealousy towards other men who seem to have more. If you see guys interact, you'll see that it's more of a communal thing. Conversing, demonstrating, and asking questions.

What men really are is frustrated about how women treat them with disdain, disappointment, suspicion, and fear.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2023-01-12T16:19:48+00:00

“An action committed in anger is an action doomed to failure”.

Instead of being mad at other dudes. The young bucks should turn that into inspiration and drive. Abs start grinding. At what? Whatever makes them better. It’s gonna be different for every dude but you never hear someone go “that loser: He’s a hard worker”. Or “that dude who is lifting and getting stronger would be so much better off of the couch”

Opening_Pattern_301 · 2023-01-12T16:26:27+00:00

Men do not resent women because being ghosted or being rejected, do you know the actual reason why a lot of young guys grow so much contempt for women? what happens when you raise a young boy with the beliefs like "women are better than men, men need women, men are inferior, you must be super nice to women or they wont like you, you must show a woman how good you are or you are nothing, women are always right, you didnt lose your virginity in highschool? there must be something wrong with you, men are horrible to women so you should be different, cant get a girlfriend? there must be something wrong with you" see when you raise young boy to make women the center of his life, when you raise him to be a good boy in pro of women, when you raise him to believe that women are always right and that they know better than men and thats why he should do everything they demand so he can be liked by them, what happens then? what happens when he sees that guys who dont try as hard get love, validation and respect? what happen when he sees men who are plain bad getting love, validation and respect? what happens when said guy tries so hard to be a "good" guy only to end up in the friendzone watching the girls he likes crying over his shoulder about how much of an asshole the men she dates (and fucks) are, what happens when you raise men to believe that sex is such a bad thing and that they are wrong for having sexual thoughs only to see those men who treat women as "sexual objects" getting love and intimacy? what happens then? of course he will grow up full of hatred and resentment, see he is not respected because women wont approve of him yet and actual asshole who doesnt even tries and sometimes is abusive (or at least thats how women paint him) gets showered in attention by women, in their psychology they think "so a guy like that is better than me?", imagine a guy who gives candy to everyone but you and everybody calls you a loser for that, he tells you that you are not good enough so demands you to improve, you try to improve, yet you see him giving candy to people who on paper arent as good as you, you even see him giving them candy to try and win them over, of course you would hate that mfker, of course you would despise him, well thats the situation many men are in, they get told to pursue the candy, they get told to behave in a certain way to get candy, they dont get it, they see men who arent even good getting the candy, and yes i use this analogy because thats precisely the psychology of those men, they were raised like if they were dogs at the service of women only to see cats being treated better than them, with this im not justifying hatred or mysoginy, im simply exposing why it happens. We have a mental health epidemic right now, a lot of men have their mental health destroyed because they were given the wrong set of ideas since an early age and you can see it manifesting in the amount of things that get posted around here sometimes, but this is just the tip of the iceberg, scroll around tik tok or instagram and you ll see that this is way more common than what lurkers in this sub want to believe.

-angels-fan- · 2023-01-12T16:39:13+00:00

I'm not sure it's anger at women as much as it's anger at the blue pillness of it all.

When you realize you've been gaslit your whole life with stupid platitudes of "looks don't matter" and "just be yourself", then you realize all the girls are fucking hot guys, it's a bit jarring.

KamuiObito · 2023-01-12T16:47:16+00:00

You into cuckhold aren’t you

bodaciousbonsai · 2023-01-12T17:33:53+00:00

"a man better than you for her needs in every single way"

Except in his willingness to commit.

epicgamer1986 · 2023-01-12T20:50:12+00:00

Jokes on you I dislike both

Administrative-Lie85 · 2023-01-12T16:05:42+00:00

Women are not choosing "better" men. They are choosing bums, losers, schlubs, deadbeats, cowards, and weaklings.

eholt21 · 2023-01-12T16:21:26+00:00

why wouldnt they be mad at themselves for not being better able to compete

Numerous_Ad_1555 · 2023-01-12T16:39:11+00:00

Ok, let’s say a man will always pick Kylie Jenner over a girl at his level. Do women have a right to be angry at him for being delusional and hurting them? And then maybe coming back 10 years later and being desperate for someone that’s actually on his level?

Side note I don’t buy the whole 6ft 9 chad gets all the women incel stuff, but there is some truth to it.

melody_of_ · 2023-01-12T21:28:07+00:00

The man had to be so much more and do so much more to have the "privilege" of out competing me in this scenario.

The woman just had to exist. Why would i hold any contempt for the man hes just trying to struggle through a dating market that is optimized for what woman want.

Men should realize a woman wanting the best is for herself is perfectly fine - who wouldn't want the best partner, career, life for themselves??

And they have much easier access to the best for them they just are unwilling to put in the same work for dating that men are. Of course its still frustrating to be in the position of a man when your seeing so much unearned abundance around you. Even "Chad" has to perform.

Khabeni412 · 2023-01-12T22:46:40+00:00

So I shouldn't be mad at my step mother using me for her sexual needs when I was four? What should my punishment be since women can never do anything wrong? Women are selfish and very superficial. If they have a problem, instead of taking responsibility, it's always a man's fault. Men want what best too. But women can be height snobs but we are not allowed to ask about weight.

vapordaveremix · 2023-01-12T22:46:55+00:00

Men's anger shouldn't be directed at women or at their competition. It's just how the mating game goes. You're either selected or you're not.

Take all that anger and put it toward something productive.

modidlee · 2023-01-12T16:52:04+00:00

So women are constantly on the lookout for a “better” man? If that’s true then people shouldn’t blame men for just wanting casual sexual relationships with women. If women are always looking to “upgrade” then why do people argue and disagree with redpill phrases like “she’s not yours it’s just your turn,” or “all women are like that?”

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EnvironmentalDish628 · 2023-01-12T16:30:01+00:00

For me it's more about fucking old school our dating system seems with bullied low status men having it impossible and the winners of the male world has a ton of women , if you combine that with al the modern woke womens talking points is when it gets a bit frustrating

Safinated · 2023-01-12T16:59:52+00:00

More hostility, conflict and competition! That’s exactly what we need!

HighestTierMaslow · 2023-01-12T17:09:48+00:00

I agree with your stance for certain situations. But not every rejection women give out to men stems from her wanting to better herself. Some women have their own issues, just arent attracted or just realize the man isnt right for her. Ive rejected several men whom I admired and who were attractive but I knew we wouldnt be a good fit romantically.

I also rejected a few men in college who had everything on paper but I just wasnt attracted to them and couldnt force myself to be when I wanted to be. One of these men took it personally and I think destroyed himself emotionally over it, despite me telling him not to do this. Ive also had men reject me for the same reason and Ive rejected several men right before my husband because our personalities werent a good match. Some examples is they didnt like goofy people (Im goofy and no way am I changing that), they preferred women with ALOT of sexual experience (I didnt have that), etc.

mugdul · 2023-01-12T17:48:22+00:00

Oh, sure, let's just blame it all on "superior" men and absolve women of any responsibility. That's a great idea. Never mind that women can and do make their own choices, and sometimes those choices hurt men. But no, let's just blame it all on some imaginary "superior" man who out-competed the poor, helpless guy. And what's this about being angry at not getting into a college or not getting a job? That's just ridiculous. It's not like those things are important or anything.

smarmycheesesandwich · 2023-01-12T17:49:06+00:00

Not even bro. I’ve had two partners cheat. The guy was objectively uglier in both situations. One guy was an unemployed abuser. And I’m not a shallow man.

It stemmed from the absolutely pummeled self esteem and mental health issues.

Back before I treated my bipolar disorder I participated in hellish amounts of self sabotage and philandering. Blamed it on the recent trauma of the time.

My self esteem was rock bottom and I tried to bury it in meaningless hookups to feed my validation.

Guess what? It failed miserably.

Being alone and confronting my insecurities and problems head on was the cure.

gate18 · 2023-01-12T18:03:21+00:00

Yes, but it's just not the case.

There's no competition. You showed interest in a person, but that person doesn't share the same feeling, at the end of the story.

It's nothing like a job. It's not something waiting to be filled. There are 101 reasons why someone isn't interested in you, and the idea that they have better options is one of them.

Yes, it's easier to comprehend that the reason why someone rejects you is that they have other options, but that's more out of convenience than reality.

LeanderGrant · 2023-01-12T18:04:08+00:00

Both men and women should be angry at society. Depression, loneliness, and resentment are skyrocketing for both men and women.

We are all sold the lie that we should be attracted to nice people, but no one is. Society encourages men and women to be cruel while they pretend they are good people. Covert narcissism continues to grow among both genders. Our culture makes sure that good people will lose, and evil wins.

Your thought on superior men or superior women is pointless. Men who are deemed superior can still be abused and cheated on just as easily as the average man. Alleged "superior" women can also be treated poorly.

Our culture needs to stop the lie of niceness. That idea is far too easy to manipulate. It's based on how we want the world to work, and not based on reality.

inherentlyvalued · 2023-01-12T19:13:30+00:00

i am not interested in men becoming even more self interested and competitive than they are now

KayRay1994 · 2023-01-12T19:26:04+00:00

anything to avoid looking inwardly and fixing yourself eh?

chris_unltd · 2023-01-12T20:00:25+00:00

Does the opposite apply as well? If I ghost a woman or deem she is only suitable for casual sex, should she be angry at men for this particular behavior?

slazengerx · 2023-01-12T21:08:45+00:00

A man superior to you out-competed you for the same woman.

A hard truth that most men simply cannot handle. Why blame yourself when there's a scapegoat available?

1stevercody · 2023-01-13T05:45:31+00:00

No. She didn't "find a better mate" like she's car shopping. You just weren't it. Don't be mad at women because one, or even ten, didn't fall head over heels because you paid for dinner and held a door open. It's not because the next guy was better looking, richer, funnier, blah blah. It's because you just didn't spark her fire.

Keep looking. There are so many more women out there. Join a club, go volunteer. Go to church. Ask your auntie to set you up.

It's not your bank account. Plenty of poor dudes find love. It's not your looks, I've seen ugly guys slay. It's not your physique. 5'6" guys get women. It's your attitude, it's your demeanor. It's your confidence. Work on you. Find your passion. Women love that. Stop complaining or being the victim. Women hate that (everyone hates that).

HazyMemory7 · 2023-01-13T20:09:12+00:00

Who the hell gets mad at their own competition? That makes no sense. The person to get upset at id the person in the mirror. Personal accountability.

mugdul · 2023-01-13T21:55:39+00:00

Men, if you're angry at women for rejecting you, it's time to get over it. Women have the right to choose who they want to be with, and if they don't choose you, it's not their problem. It's yours. Instead of resenting them for your own shortcomings, focus on becoming the best version of yourself. Outcompete the other guys who are getting the girl, the job, or the promotion. Stop blaming women for your own lack of success and start working on yourself. And remember, rejection is just a part of life, it happens to everyone. Don't take it personally and move on.

Title	Men's anger towards women is misplaced: it should be towards other better men
Author	estoniaball
Upvotes	0
Comments	243
Date	January 12, 2023 3:45 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/10a2pn7/mens_anger_towards_women_is_misplaced_it_should/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/mens-anger-towards-women-is-misplaced-it-should-be.1148632 https://theredarchive.com/post/1148632

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