Why do straight women like other women so much more than they like men?

yemma257 · 2024-07-29T06:41:00+00:00

Dealt with this a lot as a bisexual woman. Straight women would rave about how much they loved me and how much easier their lives would be if they could date me instead, “you’re literally my wife 🥺 ily girl if I’m not married by 30 please let’s buy a house together and grow old”… yeah that kinda BS.

I think it’s a situation of “the grass is greener on the other side”. Straight women romanticize wlw relationships and friendships until they actually have to deal with the nitty gritty of it. Like a falling out with a friend. It’s like a switch flips and they become evil. Most misogynistic and hate-filled beings ever. I’ve seen more misogyny from women than men sometimes.

It’s funny they assume being lesbian or bisexual is some paradise where you just “date your best friend” and “have cute picnics”. Like no, we still fuck and hookup and have shitty communication and ghost just like straight men do to yall. Lesbians/other women can be fuckboys too lol. I think it’s also a situation where some women choose horrible men and see their typical, normal girl friends as angels since they actually see them as people. Rose tinted glasses type beat.

Cant comment on the attractiveness thing since there’s very few women I wouldn’t bed LOL, because I’m mainly attracted to women moreso than men.

sweetestpineapple · 2024-07-29T12:25:06+00:00

Finding someone beautiful is different than finding them sexually attractive. Women generally put more effort into their looks with fashion, hair and makeup. That’s why different “types” of women can be considered beautiful. Straight women admire dedication to beauty routines and aesthetics and are way more likely to notice things like manicures and nice eyebrows. I think women find other women more interesting because they tend to have common interests.

mlo9109 · 2024-07-29T10:50:24+00:00

Not all of us do.. as the lifelong victim of mean girls, including my own mother, I have a healthy distrust of other women.

I have even had mean girls pretending to be my friend. Between that and the MLM huns, a woman being nice to me is sus.

The idea of living among all women or in a matriarchy sounds like hell on earth to me. I do not find my gender superior.

Novel-Tip-7570 · 2024-07-29T11:31:08+00:00

I am not sure that's really true. However, I understand why it might look that way form the male perspective. Women tend to present a united front when it comes to men. However, they can be quite bitchy to each other.

EulenWatcher · 2024-07-29T12:19:46+00:00

Not straight, but I’m gonna reply anyway.

I think both men and women are so used to the idea that women are valued for their appearance that we just pay more attention to it. I might be wrong, but I think there are more depiction of women’s bodies in the art.

Considering personality I think it’s similar to men claiming that other men are easier to deal with, they’re funnier etc. If you look at your own post history, you’ll see yourself praising men and criticizing women a lot. People have easier time relating to their own gender and it’s easy to fall into a cognitive mistake of seeing your gender in a better light, especially when you have more positive experience with it than the opposite gender.

Anonynymphet · 2024-07-29T16:45:19+00:00

I don’t hold these beliefs, I think women are just as boring/interesting as men. I can appreciate a woman’s physique and not want to have sex with her, because I’m not insecure about my sexuality (unlike men who get worried they’d be called gay). Gym bros big up each other’s appearances all the time, and I view it quite endearingly tbh.

Big-Calligrapher686 · 2024-07-29T15:21:44+00:00

For the same reason men like men more than they like women despite ostensibly being straight. They understand them more (in general) and can therefore empathize with them more. I don't think it's much more complicated than that.

Arch_Null · 2024-07-29T21:12:32+00:00

female socialization makes people more pleasant and fun to be around than male socialization does.

Flightlessbirbz · 2024-07-30T01:29:51+00:00

Same reason straight men tend to like men more as people than they like women as people. People tend to like people who are similar to them. You won’t hear men complimenting men’s looks as much, but they will say men are more interesting and women are boring. In both cases, it’s simply because they usually don’t share as many interests. If anything, women are usually more willing to listen to men talk about their interests than the other way around.

As a neurodivergent bi woman, I can tell you that women aren’t always so accepting of women if they’re a little different either. Men also aren’t always accepting of men who aren’t like them. Gender is just one commonality, things like socioeconomic status and interests play a big role too.

GridReXX · 2024-07-29T16:23:37+00:00

So many women are beautiful, stunning, and very aesthetically appealing, while nearly all men are unappealing and it's extremely rare to find an attractive one. Overall, the female form is simply much more attractive than the male form.

I don't think most straight women feel this way. I think women might think more women than men try harder to "present as aesthetic." But seeing how many women really love and appreciate the male form when it's physically good looking or when the guy looks like he gives a damn, I seriously doubt women don't find men physically attractive. I've seen too many women ogling over male Olympic swimmers to think women don't find the male physique attractive. (inb4 "that's apex fallacy!" Last time I checked men are mostly salivating over physically attractive "apex" women.)

Relatedly: displays of male sexuality are disgusting, while displays of female sexuality are sexy and hot.

Can you elaborate? Male sexuality isn't default "disgusting." I don't think women think that.

However, male sexuality when expressed by many men does come off more violative, violent, and aggressive than female sexuality. For example, men make more "rape" jokes than women.

This seems like women accurately observing some differences between how men and women express and display their sexuality, comparatively speaking, and generally speaking.

Women are so extremely interesting, cool, and fun to talk to, while men are just bland and have no personality.

Eh. I've heard more men display this sentiment about women than I've heard women express this sentiment about men.

Furthermore, people prefer to hang around people they can relate to and who respect them on a basic human level. I assume “mutual likability” goes for both women and men when choosing who they want to hang around.

Women are also so much more caring, empathetic, mature, and emotionally intelligent than men.

Men on this very sub have said that they find women to be more nurturing, empathic, caring, and "mature" acting than men.

As far as intelligence, I have a hot take that people who are more empathic in a “measured” way (a.k.a. more able to easily consider multiple perspectives a.k.a. who possess the ability to "problem-frame") are going to come off more intelligent. This isn't a gender thing, per se. It's a skill issue.

HighestTierMaslow · 2024-07-29T22:05:02+00:00

I dont get this. I dislike men and women equally. Ive been screwed over by so many female friends I could write a book. Pretty much all flaws discussed here about men I see women do. Hence my "No pill" flair.

concretecannonball · 2024-07-29T08:42:38+00:00

Men also find male displays of sexuality to be disgusting unless they’re the one doing them, to be fair

Women ARE more empathetic and emotionally intelligent than men, it’s not an opinion thing. Obviously it’s easier to build friendships and have a better opinion of people who have the skills that make them easier to communicate and spend time with.

katecard · 2024-07-29T06:46:34+00:00

Because women don't hate other women, and it's nice to be around people who don't hate you and see you as inferior.

rosesonthefloor · 2024-07-29T11:08:05+00:00

I don’t know, I think the heterosexual “default” implication comes into play for a lot of this here, where women complimenting women doesn’t necessarily imply desire and has a generally expected set of responses, while complimenting men usually implies desire and can lead to unintended/unexpected responses. It’s easier to get to a place of emotional intimacy in a friendship when you have less uncertainty how the other person feels about you.

In a lot of ways, it’s just that women are “safer” in a sense - generally I can assume, as a woman, that if a woman is being nice to me, helping me out, etc. that behavior won’t “turn off” if I’m not interested in sleeping with them. So I don’t have to worry about my behavior on such a detailed basis or consider like “would this give her the wrong idea?” in the same way I would with men.

It’s not about who is more attractive or interesting. I love learning about people and asking questions about themselves, and honestly I find something attractive about most men because everyone’s overall “package” of features and qualities is so unique.

However I’ve also noticed that my conversations with men don’t often lead to the same level of detail that my conversations with women do. As a result, my friendships with men are more surface level than my friendships with women. There’s also no implication of desire in asking a female friend to hang out solo vs. a male friend. So it’s a lot easier and more comfortable.

Add that to the women’s in-group supportive bias and you have women supporting women on principle a lot of the time - like in bar bathrooms lmao. Whereas it’s just harder to have that same type of relationship with men, in general. So men are in the “out-group” in a sense, from that female bonding support.

Whether or not that support is genuine from other women is a different question though.

Edit: specifically to your point about male/female sexuality and how it’s portrayed - that’s in large part due to media. The 90s/2000s were FULL of depictions of girls being hot two-dimensional characters, the idea that two girls kissing is the hottest thing ever, etc. While the depictions of boys were “they’ll fuck anything” or they’re always horny, etc. We’ve been told for decades at this point that men are insatiable nutjobs when it comes to sex, and women are the beautiful objects of their desire. Not hard to believe that that’s been internalized by some of the population to varying degrees.

TheAvocadoSlayer · 2024-07-29T23:32:39+00:00

These women you’re talking about are incredibly delusional. I cannot imagine painting every single woman with the same brush. Women are human beings, this means they have the same inherent capacity of being terrible human beings as men.

januaryphilosopher · 2024-07-29T11:55:28+00:00

Men support men the most and women support women the most. People generally prefer to socialise with those who are like them and it's in their interest to lift up people like them. Of course men do this but it can look a bit different. They often call even very pretty women plain or ugly but won't even pass remark on the looks of men or even say they look great well into old age, they often support male sexuality while ignoring what women want or saying it's the same as what men want or they should submit to what men want otherwise it's weird and gross, and they usually prefer to socialise with other men and say they're much more interesting or less drama.

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2024-07-29T17:42:50+00:00

I think it relieves each other's low self confidence. They can overlook their flaws as mens faults because they are 'good enough' for their friends.

It's a coping mechanism based on ignoring ones flaws

CherryPieAlibi · 2024-08-28T06:22:31+00:00

I don’t think majority of normal women hold that belief but as a woman, of course I would prefer to hang out with women! We can actually relate to one another. As a woman who has always had an easier time befriending boys due to mother issues, the army has surely fixed that. Being around 95% males at all times has made me so desperately miss being in female spaces. Or just having girlfriends to be girls with. And about the looks things, I think women are just the fairer sex. I mean, look at them! But I think it’s totally unfair to say that men in general are ugly because that’s so untrue

Salt_Mathematician24 · 2024-07-29T12:48:09+00:00

Patriarchal culture and the male gaze coding beauty and sensuality a female trait combined with gap in understand between the sexes and general safety concerns of women.

SaBahRub · 2024-07-29T11:11:25+00:00

What is your problem with women liking other women ? You guys like your own gender, why can’t we?

-Shes-A-Carnival · 2024-07-29T12:22:42+00:00

neither of those two things are remotely why or are anything women actually express at all.

operation-spot · 2024-07-29T17:42:51+00:00

The best way I can explain it is that I really like myself so I like seeing aspects of myself in others. When I’m walking around I see most women looking extremely put together while a lot of men don’t. I like the same things as most women and we’ve had similar life experiences so it’s easier to connect with them compared to people who have extremely different lives than me.

In terms of sexuality, there’s nothing to reconcile because seeing the beauty in someone doesn’t make me want to have sex with them. To the point about men being amorphous blobs, I think that’s more about lacking an aesthetic and fashion sense more than anything else. When you look at men’s clothes they do nothing to accentuate the body and actively cover the things that are even mildly interesting to look at.

In short, my admiration of women is not sexual, it’s aspirational.

chalkandapples · 2024-07-29T17:51:37+00:00

I don't know if it has to do with being straight or not, but if you're a woman your friends are also women. You tend to like the group you're friends with.

And for some reason women seem to have a connection with other women. I feel comfortable running up to any woman to ask for help, there seems to be an inherently "I got you" thing with other women.

Other women are also very in-tuned with me emotionally, like if I had emotional turmoil, they feel like a warm and safe place.

This is on top of me actually have nothing in common in terms of interest with a lot of women. My hobbies and interests are very male dominated, and most women are not fun to talk to. They're actually rather boring to talk to and the entire time I would struggle to join in on their discussions because we have so little in common. I have a lot more fun with men than women, but I still have a natural bond regardless with other women because of all the things I mentioned before.

From a sexuality perspective, I just don't want to date or have sex with women. I don't think it's something you have to explain why on, I just don't.

I do think men are fun, brave, and cool to be around. But there's not that natural bond like I have with other women. When I have problems I want to turn to women, when I enter a room full of strangers, I look for other women even though the guys are probably talking about stuff I'm more interested in.

My husband is someone I would want to turn to more so than other random women, or even close friends these days. But that's because I spend 80% of my waking hours with him and he knows me much deeper than a lot of my friends do now. From an emotional confidant perspective women are naturally better than him, but he makes up for it by spending more time with me and knowing me better.

flipsidetroll · 2024-07-29T13:00:25+00:00

First, where did you hear this bullshit? I have never heard a single straight woman say those things. So you either move in a very strange circle or you’ve heard it once and are repeating it, or you are a red piller posting shit to karma farm and probably use it on another site when you get three whole women who might agree with you. Either way, it’s complete horseshit and you are a juvenile fool.

Title	Why do straight women like other women so much more than they like men?
Author	f_lachowski
Upvotes	74
Comments	298
Date	July 29, 2024 6:25 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1eeskqq/why_do_straight_women_like_other_women_so_much/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-do-straight-women-like-other-women-so-much.1525651 https://theredarchive.com/post/1525651

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