Guys and watching porn

nonplussedminus · 2024-02-25T20:20:28+00:00

I didn't watch porn growing up and people told me it was weird that I didn't. Certainly far more off putting than watching it. As far as I can tell the porn hate is mostly just a cheap way to rag on men because almost all dudes have watched porn at some point in their lives. But it's weirder to never have watched it.

Professional_Chair28 · 2024-02-25T20:16:37+00:00

Maybe the people complaining about porn aren’t the ones starting an OF…

hey-momo · 2024-02-25T23:35:00+00:00

i don't like porn and i don't like onlyfans. i don't tell my boyfriend he can't watch porn but if he did it too much it would totally turn me off him, i just can't respect a guy that spends a lot of time in base physical self-indulgence instead of having self control and channeling his extra energies into being great. especially when i do give him a good sex life already. it's like.... watching an obese man addicted to fried food stuff his face all day with a giant bowl of cheese puffs.

Old_Initial_9778 · 2024-02-25T20:36:45+00:00

These are two entirely separate subjects you’re talking about. I don’t know why you’re assuming a person believes on thing also agrees with the other,

ComfortableJeans · 2024-02-25T20:15:11+00:00

I imagine there's not much cross over between the Porn Bad and OnlyFans Good crowds.

That venn diagram is most likely just two separate circles.

howdoiw0rkthisthing · 2024-02-25T21:18:05+00:00

Personally I don’t care that my husband watches porn because I watch porn. We often watch it together. One day I said, “do you think porn is bad for us?” He replied, “oh absolutely” and then we continued.

Valuable-Marzipan761 · 2024-02-25T20:37:56+00:00

Let's be realistic. 99% of women that don't want their partner watching porn, are not on onlyfans. You're doing the classic thing of "wow, these two people are contradicting each other despite being the same sex. Who'd have thought it?"

Highonuppers · 2024-02-25T20:27:55+00:00

I doubt the people who are against porn are the same saying OF is okay. I also bet that a minority thinks that OF is “female empowerment.” Personally, I have no problem with people watching porn occasionally and in moderation because porn is addictive, and it’s been proven to be harmful with several negative effects in the brain, body, and relationships.

Few-Laugh-6508 · 2024-02-25T21:18:32+00:00

I dont think any woman who has a problem with porn is also literally producing said porn.

Part of the issue is porn changes how you respond to arousal and sex. It however is "easier" and "more exciting" so consequences be damned.

RatchedAngle · 2024-02-25T22:04:22+00:00

Because no man who watches porn would be okay with his girlfriend making it.

He sexually prefers hot crazy women but his girlfriend is stuck being the “safe good girl” who’s marriage material.

He will watch porn but simultaneously denigrate porn stars. Porn stars are allowed to be hot and sexy but his girlfriend is required to be pure and innocent and sweet.

It’s the double standard. Women don’t want to be the “safe option” either. Watching porn usually means you aren’t putting a lot of effort into seeing your girlfriend as a sexual being or elevating her pleasure in the bedroom.

If men took the energy they put into building up their spank banks and put it in the bedroom, their girlfriends would actually orgasm every now and then.

GridReXX · 2024-02-25T22:04:12+00:00

I find both distasteful.

Gitsumrestmf · 2024-02-25T20:22:04+00:00

It's not so common for women to have an OF, especially outside of English-speaking countries. As for porn, there are many reasons why it's...probably not a good sign in men.

Perfect-Resist5478 · 2024-02-25T20:17:36+00:00

There’s probably not a whole lot of overlap between the women who have a problem with their bfs watching porn and the women who do OF. It’s almost as if AWANTS

Tall_Simple7307 · 2024-02-26T01:21:25+00:00

Shaming language to lower your "value" or remove you from the discussion.

Those type of women want to have your cake and eat it too.

You're a bad person if you watch pornography, but you're also a bad person if you shame her for creating pornography. She will call you a misogynist, and if you ask her the definition of it she will cry and you're labeled as a "bad guy". It's a power move

Cethlinnstooth · 2024-02-25T20:31:21+00:00

Both change one's opinion of a person.

I don't particularly give a shit if my opinion of some random female acquaintance changes to thinking she's excessively reckless and dumb as shit for not finding a better way to make money. I can easily push her further out in my friends circle or all the way out.

I do care if I am in an established relationship with a fully grown man and my opinion of him becomes significantly lower due to a new stupid habit he acquires. Throwing the whole man out because he's become more pitiful and easy dopamine driven than the average fifteen year old boy is a massive goddamn hassle...but keeping him around like that is intolerable. Do I care when random men who are nothing to do with me become coomers? Nope. That's their problem. They can wank the entire rest of their earthly days away in the privacy of their own residence and I don't care. Splash everything you are and could be up against the underside of your desk. It's yours to spend.

Geselshaft · 2024-02-25T20:47:17+00:00

Porn is competition for women. They don’t want you looking or dating other girls, and porn is no different.

harmonica2 · 2024-02-26T00:20:31+00:00

As for porn ruining relationships, how does it exactly? The guy just spends too much time watching it?

Otherwise_Aioli_7187 · 2024-02-25T20:31:33+00:00

I think men are shamed for porn usage because there seems to be an increase of male porn addiction right now and alot of women have been speaking out about how it’s ruined their relationships, interactions and perceptions of men. Only fans creators are still heavily stigmatised for their profession but it maybe viewed as empowerment in some peoples eyes because it’s the creators choice to do their own content and be sexual liberated. whereas, it’s heavily documented that the porn industry is unethical , filled with abuse and trafficking.

RealMenEatPussy · 2024-02-25T22:26:35+00:00

Because it makes them insecure.

Independent_Sell_588 · 2024-02-25T23:11:31+00:00

OF is not female empowerment. It’s degrading. Women shouldn’t do onlyfans just as much as men should not watch porn.

Legitimate_Type_1324 · 2024-02-25T20:10:34+00:00

No one really cares much. It's just reddit being reddit

januaryphilosopher · 2024-02-25T20:53:13+00:00

I wonder why people would tell off people who are exploiting others and not the ones being exploited?

Safinated · 2024-02-25T21:25:41+00:00

Both are shamed for their deleterious effects despite the demand

ShakeNBake007 · 2024-02-25T22:03:56+00:00

Women are hypocrites. Every girl I've ever dated had porn in their browser history. They get jealous of everything you look at or spend time doing. I had one ex tell me she thought I loved my playstation more than her. Now an Onlyfans isn't an ideal occupation. But in this economy if I could earn more by beating off online than I do working. I sure as hell will. People need to learn how to separate fantasy from reality. If she isn't actually meeting up with her customers and he isn't with pornstars. Just let it be. This world has real problems.

Soloandthewookiee · 2024-02-25T20:11:48+00:00

Why are men still shamed nowadays by women for watching porn (in a relationship or even single) but its okay for a woman or someone they know to start up an OF because its female empowerment

Oh, that's because the world you described is made up. Dudes watching porn is so common it's basically considered universal while women doing Only Fans is still heavily stigmatized.

This is really just a post to complain about women doing Only Fans while also making it seem like women are the hypocrites.

SlowEffective8146 · 2024-02-25T22:23:30+00:00

Because men are shamed for anything and everything; you'll learn that being a man is a crime in the eyes of libfems

PixelizedPlayer · 2024-02-25T23:10:13+00:00

Most of the women i've had relationships with enjoyed watching porn with me. Don't waste your energy around women who shame men. Just find the ones who have the same values as you. If men just ignored the women who shame men then they would probably stop doing it since they no longer get attention from the attempt to shame.

The same way women who do only fans don't care that men shame them, they just avoid socialising with those men.

-Shes-A-Carnival · 2024-02-25T21:08:13+00:00

lol women don't think having an OF is ok

coolusernameHi-5 · 2024-02-25T21:18:42+00:00

I'm a guy and I don't watch porn. When I need to jack off I do it without porn.

Competitive-Ask4393 · 2024-02-26T09:22:24+00:00

They're both shit.

Porn fries your brain and your perception of the world.

OF girls are deeply insecure and validation seekers. The type to get their current bf stabbed and robbed because some new dude gave them validation.

Reason why women get mad about guys watching though is they want to be the center in their mans life but at this point its insanely hypocritical. A lot of women (i'd say 50%) watch porn and it's 100x worse than what most men watch on average. Most have a weird have your cake and eat it too approach where it's considered cheating / disloyal for men to watch but when she gets home, she's finger blasting herself to some gangbang / rape play (yes check studies, these are some of the most popular categories for women).

No different then when men checkout a girl and get labelled as cheater while she's eye fucking and flirting with the guy at the gym and the mans labelled "insecure".

Avoid porn addicted men, Avoid OF women. Don't interact with people who hold double standards.

campskills21 · 2024-02-26T14:25:44+00:00

Women are the queens of double standards.

Literal_Jesus_ · 2024-02-26T18:57:40+00:00

I more mock the consumption of it and subsequent disgust with SW as a concept.

I don't care what people do in their free time by themselves. But I do think if you're anti-OF you shouldn't be watching porn of any kind. Bc OF content is usually made more ethically than anything coming out of a production house.

ArmariumEspada · 2024-02-25T20:34:59+00:00

The more blatant hypocrisy is women who shame men for watching porn, but who themselves watch porn, indulge in erotica, use sex toys and openly discuss masturbating and sex, shame men for their penis size and sexual prowess, etc. That’s the hypocrisy that needs to be discussed.

Cnb30 · 2024-02-25T21:05:23+00:00

Hard to blame men for turning to porn when women these days are so difficult. Everyone has a right to pleasure.

TRTGymBro · 2024-02-26T11:51:27+00:00

First of all, who cares what women say or think. You will be much happier and more confident when you stop caring about women's thoughts on things. It truly doesn't matter. 90% of the time it's lies and bullshit just to see how easy it is to manipulate you and shittest you. Apparently, it seems to be working with 99% of men, because you get your panties twisted in a bunch over every little thing women say. Imagine some Neanderthal being told by his cave chick - you can draw naked women on the cave walls and look at them. Lol, he'd boink her on the head with his bat so fast, she won't be able to say her name.

Second, you can do whatever the fuck yoy want with your time and with your penis. They belong to you. If you let women control what you do with your time and your penis, then you are a pussy and you deserve to be treated like a slave.

Lastly, you should probably not watch porn because the psychological effects are actually detrimental to you.

KayRay1994 · 2024-02-25T21:35:32+00:00

because free porn often lies on exploitation - trafficking for amateur sex work at worst, and cohered women at best. Independent porn, while this is all still possible, it is far less likely - really the difference is you’re supporting exploitative entities for free content vs paying for an independent creator

With that being said, while OF is better than traditional porn, it’s still porn and it’s still bad for you. OF may be better than professionally shot or amateur porn purely from a workers rights pov - but from an actual effect on you, its still porn, and porn is still something you should not engage in as it has tons of negative effects.

wtknight · 2024-02-25T22:06:46+00:00

Women don't like porn because they think that the women who are doing it are being victimized. They also don't like the increasingly violent nature of a lot of porn.

That doesn't apply to OF (as far as I know). The women are making a free choice to do it, and, from what I've heard, it seems to be just women showing off their bodies to men and talking to them rather than violent enactments.

Of course, women shame the creators of the demand rather than the suppliers of it. Partly because many of the women need the money. Mostly because the creators of it are mostly on "Team Woman".

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John_Oakman · 2024-02-25T21:15:41+00:00

Single males are supposed to use the time & energy saved from not watching porn to pursue moral virtues & self improvement instead. That's the implication from the anti-porn crowd, and are they really that wrong for wanting more people to better themselves?

Hotsexygirl9 · 2024-02-25T22:31:26+00:00

r/loveafterporn

RubyDiscus · 2024-02-26T07:50:34+00:00

I don't care about porn.

Watching porn doesn't automatically mean they are addicted.

The women who have an issue with it usually are envious/jealous and see it as cheating.

AK_Aries · 2024-02-26T12:19:57+00:00

Please don't get me wrong But let me describe porn to you in a few words. It's when fog sets in and never leaves. it's when every memory is such a blur , it's when you procrastinate forever and only find energy to watch even more porn, mote scrolling and another dopamine hit... Anyone selling their pics/vids on onlyfans is an object. Objects are baught and sold and have a price tag determining their worth, when men stop watching and buying into that shit ,women will stop producing it.

Gilaridon · 2024-02-26T14:17:01+00:00

I see a good number of people saying "I doubt the people who are against porn are the same saying OF is okay."

I don't think OP is setting the comparison of "people who are against porn" and "people who are okay with OF". Seems like they are moreso comparing, "people who are against men watching porn" and "people who are okay with women making porn".

And to a small extent I think I agree. There's no shortage of woman that are bothered by men liking social media posts of women in bikinis (or dressed in some sexual manner) but are fine with women posting such things.

This is a double standard I've dealt with in marriage as well. It's fine for her to look at, ogle, and talk about women but if I do much as look at a woman it's a problem.

obviousredflag · 2024-02-26T14:58:26+00:00

I have never been shamed for watching porn by anyone. Who are you talking to? Where do you get that from?

XXXblackrabbit · 2024-02-26T16:09:10+00:00

I’ll play devils advocate here: it’s like a drug dealer refusing to date a drug user. Yeah it’s messed up because the drug dealer is profiting off selling the drugs, but why would they want to date a junkie?

Soul_vaccine · 2024-02-26T16:32:09+00:00

It’s just shaming. Trying to make men feel ashamed of their sex. Men are allowed to be sexual creatures. There’s nothing wrong with watching porn from time to time. What’s wrong is to pretend you aren’t a human being who wants sex from time to time.

reggieLedoux26 · 2024-02-26T16:34:48+00:00

The same double standard applies to sex toys. If a woman owns a vibrator she’s empowered. If a guy owns a flashlight he’s disgusting.

edjohn88 · 2024-02-26T18:16:20+00:00

I will say that reliance on porn is unattractive for good reason and for women it’s probably a subconscious connection between “jerks off daily” and “cant get a girl” remember preselection works forwards and backwards. If a guy is endlessly single, there must be something wrong with him.

It’s also not a bad thing to carry a little guilt if you’re heavily reliant on porn yourself… using it constantly saps your motivation to seek real life experience. Not that every man needs to be fapless, but the more often you choose to go out and interact rather than stay home and beat off, the more successful you’ll be and definitely more happy and mentally healthy in the long run.

commentasaurus1989 · 2024-02-26T19:16:18+00:00

Wow this is the first time I’ve ever seen this topic come up what a fresh and unique perspective

/s

Savings_End8992 · 2024-02-26T19:23:50+00:00

I (man) have been watching porn for close to 20 years. I have been always very open about it (except to my family - we never talk about sex). During these 20 years I have never been shamed once. Not by friends, peers, stramgers, no-one. Even though I am visibly wearing a PornHub logo on by backpack and I do promote porn verbally and I am looking to start my own audio-based channel for women.

777RocketGuy777 · 2024-02-26T21:15:34+00:00

Not every women you know has an only fans bro

bluestjuice · 2024-02-26T22:09:09+00:00

People have complicated contradictory thoughts and feelings about porn. Because it’s sex work. Because it’s sex. Because it’s sexy. Because it turns them on. Because it disgusts them. Because the ethical implications aren’t clear. Because, like other artifacts of the digital era, the science is still working on exactly what the long-term effects on the population level will be.

Most people don’t even have personal internal consistency on this topic, let alone has some sort of mainstream cultural understanding coalesced. We should honestly keep talking about it.

Satan_and_Communism · 2024-02-26T22:23:56+00:00

Where have you met people who actually have these two views thoroughly?

apresonly · 2024-02-27T00:34:27+00:00

because porn shrinks your brain, lowers your ability to pair bond, lowers your interest in sex with human partners and makes you a shitty lover

a health conscious person isn't going to want to partner with someone who thinks this is okay

Siliconmage76 · 2024-02-27T17:37:29+00:00

Too many times I have read or heard from various girls about their boyfriend cant keep a hard on for longer than a few minutes but then jump up with their phones and run to the bathroom for an hour.

Porn addiction is real and serious problem for men under 30 these days.

Comprehensive-Bed35 · 2024-02-28T01:31:27+00:00

Simple answer that NO ONE will admit to:

BECAUSE THEY ARE HYPOCRITES!!!

What Causes Hypocrisy? At the root of hypocrisy is fear and low self-esteem. We use hypocrisy to avoid looking at our shortcomings and figure out our part in it. It typically stems from a sincere belief that we should not be held to the same standards as others because we have better intentions.

Women: the truly bitter and insecure gender, since 587,000 BC.

Title	Guys and watching porn
Author	khaste
Upvotes	22
Comments	163
Date	February 25, 2024 8:09 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1azxisp/guys_and_watching_porn/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/guys-and-watching-porn.1246432 https://theredarchive.com/post/1246432

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