Approach Us!!!

20Humble5050 · 2021-12-03T19:44:25+00:00

As an ugly man, for every girl like you that wants to be approached more, there are ten who would label me a creep for doing a perfectly innocent approach and potentially ruin my social reputation.

BL00DINMYEYES · 2021-12-03T19:12:28+00:00

The average guy wont make a move until he’s 100% sure that you’re interested in him due to fear of failure, being uncomfortable, and turning an interaction awkward. Make it obvious, flirt a little bit. Watch some videos on signs a girl likes you/ iOi’s and hope he catches on to those.

Loki25HMC · 2021-12-03T19:10:26+00:00

Approach us then!!!!

Firc · 2021-12-04T01:59:36+00:00

While I agree with the post, lets not forget who this is coming from. This is a 41 year old women (good looking) with 2 kids. You seem nice but I would never actually approach you in real life with intentions of dating or hooking up. Young men are probably not approaching what appears as friendly older ladies. Most older ladies are friendlier with me simply because they are already taken and happy. They don't have their guard up like young girls who get hit on all the time. The people who are telling you to approach us in this case are correct. You have to be a bit extra in order to convey what you want at your age.

Woujo · 2021-12-03T21:18:09+00:00

Most guys cannot appreciate women they do not know. The anxiety is too much.

I have also found that some women just look mean, even if they are not, and those women rarely get approached, but women who "look" nice get approached a lot. You may have resting bitch face.

eatmorefootball · 2021-12-03T19:59:38+00:00

Look, I don’t mean to be the guy crying out about how hard men have it but come on now, give me a break. If it’s so easy, why don’t you start approaching men?

Obi2 · 2021-12-03T20:57:11+00:00

The prettier you are the less you will be approached. Fear of failure is the main reason guys don't approach in general. The guys who DO approach, a good amount of them are probably over confident or narcissistic. Where are you going to in your free time? Guys are constantly being told that approaching girls you do not know is creepy. I was just having this convo with some coworkers last week and all the girls were acting like only serial killers do that.. I haven't read all your posts to get context, but I would just give a dude a compliment, an obvious one and if he takes the bait then good. Don't say you like his shoes or his coat, tell him you like him smile or his eyes. Then linger for a bit with open body language. Sometimes dudes need a few minutes to gain the courage. I'm a pretty good looking dude with lots of "value" in terms of height, athleticism, education, and work.. but even for me and guys with more power than me it can be difficult to not worry about getting turned down, especially in public.

Moctezuma_93 · 2021-12-03T20:19:50+00:00

This just isn't sound advice. Not all women want to be approached by men.

genoherpasyphilaids · 2021-12-03T20:33:59+00:00

God forbid you have to do more than just smile to get attention 🙄

2021-12-03T21:16:00+00:00

How should we approach ?

What to say and what NOT to say.

Help a newbie out

Redis_Sara · 2021-12-03T21:43:16+00:00

I have the handsome but shy syndrome so I can’t approach for shit….

chuckvsthelife · 2021-12-03T22:01:16+00:00

For every person who says they wish they would be approached every guy hears 10 that say that just being out in public isn't permission to be hit on.

PiratesFan1429 · 2021-12-03T19:37:04+00:00

Wanna go out? I'll show you my baseball card collection

2021-12-04T01:02:24+00:00

I do, and Its almost always positive and goes somewhere. It's the subtle hints, girls are great at indicating interest imo. They will come standby me, or look at me, or say something just stupid/silly to me.

I've learned is if you are picking up something in the air around an attractive girl.. it's probably you just sensing the reality of the situation. She's into you, you should reciprocate, relax, acknowledge what's happening and take control so she can relax too and you can break the ice.

It's then on me to do something about it. Sometimes I don't sometimes I do. It's all fun though. I love girls they're so cute and fun xp When you can start identifying when a girls dropping subtle hints just relax chill acknowledge it be honest w her tell the truth. If ur worried about what to say just be honest your honest self is ur Tru self. Good luck homies thank u OP girls just b horny too

2021-12-04T05:31:43+00:00

Looking @ your post history..... I 100% (don't) believe this post whatsoever.

Qbertyy · 2021-12-03T21:57:04+00:00

I think most men at a certain point in their life just give up on trying. In a culture where men are expected to do so much and get no appreciation for anything they do it seems a lot better to just not bother with most women. Most don't care that a girl is pretty as much anymore, there's tons of pretty girls out there. Show men that you actually care and not just trying to get attention.

Alonso81687 · 2021-12-03T20:44:53+00:00

No, you.

flying-pancakes · 2021-12-04T05:13:55+00:00

There's a sub clause in the bro code where it states that every pretty girl has this one male friend who's trying everything he has to get out of that friend zone. So as a sign of respect to our fallen brother we delay the first move .

Robertelee1990 · 2021-12-03T23:03:32+00:00

I’m not joking or trying to be mean or anything like that.

Even ugly guys? Like I don’t approach people Because I’m fat and my face isn’t very nice and I don’t think anyone would enjoy taking to that let alone dating it.

chris23399 · 2021-12-03T23:39:20+00:00

where are you from? I feel like its more US culture

darksword2020 · 2021-12-03T18:54:18+00:00

Make eye contact 3 times with the next guy you want to approach you. Yes, you may have to go a little out your way on the third time.

Do it today and let us know what happened.

Let the social expirement begin...

Alex_O7 · 2021-12-03T22:48:07+00:00

Mmmh I think you have to mention more things, like context, places and even city/country you are referring.

If you go in a library for example, don't expect to be approached, even you make big eyes and smiles at a guy. Probably he is not there to flirt to begin with.

If you just walk around and look at guys you like it would be difficult to recieve a lot of cold approaches, I would say that only a 5-10% of guys are bold enough to make a move like that, unless they are not out there for your very same reason.

If you want to be approached you have to pick the right place and time, like go to bars, clubs and/or hang out in street if that's a thing I your city or go to a mall. I that case I bet my pp you will find out a lot of men interested in you.

P.s: probably there were some guys that was giving you sign of interest but you were not into them/noticed them 😉

Disturbed_Aidan · 2021-12-03T23:12:47+00:00

But I’m SHY

L4V1 · 2021-12-03T23:55:12+00:00

What can we say and or do AFTER we approach? oh great wise one.

I myself can be causal and everything normally when talking to any woman. BUT when I put it into my head that I actually WANT to hit on or talk to a woman, I feels like I’m trying too hard.

Xuke88 · 2021-12-04T01:22:38+00:00

Yeah but I think ur talking about wanting ur dream guy to approach. If a guy approaches but doesn't meet ur needs, he is a creep and ur running. Why should a guy volunteer for embarrassment and self esteem pain?

letmereaddamnit · 2021-12-04T02:11:48+00:00

Yeah it's weird; when I was growing up most stuff was saying not to do this. Like if you go up to a woman because she's pretty that's sexist and bad! Don't hit on girls in public you'd just bother them! Stuff like that in TV and movies and stuff, then you go online and you always hear about toxic masculinity and mansplaining, if you aproach a woman that's cat calling and it makes you evil. It seems like everything was telling me not to chase after women they don't like it.

And here I am at 23 and it turns out that much of that was bullshit. Turns out when you call a girl beautiful she smiles. Alot of them want to be talked to, shoot your shot holmie.

AUsernameTakenNot · 2021-12-04T03:10:49+00:00

So what if the pretty girl is using her phone ( IG, Facebook....) Makes the pretty girl seem unapproachable

2021-12-04T04:30:30+00:00

If I’m going to be real here, if guys aren’t approaching you then your either never outside, overweight, or so beautiful that men are scared to even look at you.

loofyd · 2021-12-04T11:50:12+00:00

I'm saving this post, I'll look at it every time i feel too scared to approach a girl or ask one to coffee

Don’t assume a pretty girl has a bf!!!

I do this quite often, any advice on how to throw this fear out of the window ?

I would love if more men would talk to me and try to get to know me

Hypothetically say if a guy approaches you , what do you like to talk about with him ?

And how can he effectively get to know you ? Asking because i want to ask this girl out but I don't know shit about what to talk about if she agrees

Thanks for this post, it means alot to guys like me who think approaching girls whom we don't know will get us men in big trouble !

Cheers ✌🏽

Neckyourself1 · 2021-12-03T20:35:18+00:00

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BlackBatman91 · 2021-12-04T00:05:47+00:00

We do, but you ( women) give us the cold shoulder as if it we committed a crime by trying to talk to you. Not saying you do this but a lot of women are only interested in talking to a guy that she herself finds physically attractive.

ProductivityMonster · 2021-12-04T06:12:27+00:00

It's funny that you have a lot in common with younger guys (both annoyed at the amount of work it is to approach/lead). At some age, the tables do turn. Usually it's guys asking out the hot, young women and then as they get older, usually the women actually have to do some work beyond looking pretty. It's usually a shock to them as they've been utterly spoiled their entire lives with male attention up until ~35 years old. Consider that a lot of the guys are really kind of tired of it after ~20 years of hard work hitting on flaky, young women with lots of options - that's why they're very quick to leave and not willing to put up with non-reciprocation/initiation.

EDIT: I would also add black women to that list of people with fewer options and to a lesser extent fat women (although that's usually within one's control). Basically younger white/asian women who are not fat have it super easy.

TLDR; "the wall"

LandscapeClear1630 · 2021-12-04T01:48:54+00:00

Stop waiting for men to do the hard work.

DO IT YOURSELF! Approach men!

2021-12-04T06:03:14+00:00

Why don't you just approach guys? Seriously, I'd be surprised if you didn't get a date off your first try.

Hagi89 · 2021-12-03T21:48:00+00:00

So where would you like to be approached. Because few days ago i saw a similar post but she said quite the opposite. So I am not sure :(

redeyerds · 2021-12-03T22:44:35+00:00

Maybe your giving a vibe to not approach you.

ImanShumpertplus · 2021-12-03T23:17:41+00:00

going to a coffee shop tm morning

i will approach a girl while i’m there

2021-12-03T23:52:36+00:00

I think the last 5 or 6 girls I've approached had boyfriends. I don't want any drama so it ended there.

5_7pickup · 2021-12-03T23:58:10+00:00

Oh I approach you girls… alot

2021-12-04T01:02:11+00:00

We're a small community in contrast with the male population!

We must be protected

2021-12-04T01:20:49+00:00

I do not approach girls that can't look in my eyes for at least 3 seconds. I think that, just this, is a good initiative from women and make me know that they are approachable.

Make eye contact and smile, pls :)

Edit: No one likes to be a creep, I have been in some situations myself.

IamWisdom · 2021-12-04T02:34:32+00:00

I did cold approach last summer for the whole summer, granted it was probably pretty bad cold approach. But I still only ever got 1 date from it and the girl ghosted me. So now I just do night game and dating apps and I have wayyy more success doing that.

YoDaddy1069 · 2021-12-04T02:46:11+00:00

I’m really glad to hear this. I just got out of a serious long term relationship and I’m trying really hard to put myself out there and approach a lot of women. Unfortunately, I have a cell phone full of #s but I just can’t seem to land a date. It gets me down sometimes, but after seeing this, I’m gonna keep my chin up. Thank you!

SharkAttack-920 · 2021-12-04T06:09:45+00:00

So, ridicule by pompous vanity driven women is non existent? Maybe try to govern within before outsourcing. Tell all ur girl friends to not trash someone if they approach them respectfully. I say the same with us men. Don’t encourage shit behavior, and maybe the change will happen naturally

EthanWaberx · 2021-12-04T06:34:17+00:00

This is incorrect. Do not approach wemon you don't know. Seriously, they will humiliate you.

alienStarDawg420 · 2021-12-04T07:27:19+00:00

Hmm lots of software engineers that have little social interaction on the day to day basis most likely does reduce the pool size?

2021-12-04T08:09:45+00:00

I literally asked my girlfriend today if before we met I asked her for her number and we were strangers she would’ve said no.

s373n11 · 2021-12-04T08:20:21+00:00

Some girl on tiktok said to not approach women you don’t know. Sorry, our hands are tied

Ragnarok992 · 2021-12-04T08:26:39+00:00

Idk last time i wasn’t even doing shit (using my phone) i was called a creep by 2 good looking girls and almost got in a fight with some of their friends.

In this day approaching a woman is a an issue that can go south asap

ruddywaters · 2021-12-04T09:08:31+00:00

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throwMeAwayTa · 2021-12-04T09:45:11+00:00

You're preaching to the wrong crowd unfortunately; really you need to be spreading this message in feminism and similar subs. Of course sadly I don't think your view will be quite so well supported.

Voldyz · 2021-12-04T12:37:24+00:00

Sometimes what seems as obvious to a woman is very, very confusing to a man. If you like a guy, step it up a bit

unlivedbread · 2021-12-04T18:50:27+00:00

How'd you go about opening though? I usually say "hey I was walking by, thought you were pretty and wanted to introduce myself". I hear this is too direct though, how'd you go about it?

elvissayshi · 2021-12-03T20:06:01+00:00

or how about you do some approaching yourself

me personally i was brutally shot down the last time i tried. she made sure to dance on my grave, call me broke, poor and laughed in my face (funny bc i had just closed on a half a million dollar home). the reason? i spent 1-2 dollars on some nuts and bolts in her store and that's all i ever bought.

but to hell with that level of disrespect. will never approach again.

Comand94 · 2021-12-03T19:27:59+00:00

I don't intend to be mean, but I suggest you do the approaching yourself if you're so eager to find a guy. A lot of men would appreciate something like that and you are likely to get positive results from single guys, and the guys with girlfriends will mostly give you good reactions too, a woman with confidence in her resolve is quite the sight.

It is a better, more powerful experience to empower yourself than to ask someone to do it for you - look at the guys who are happy even though they got rejected, you wouldn't believe it, but asking someone out with no expectations makes you feel good about yourself in a neat kind of way, it's something everyone should try if they can.

PanchasX · 2021-12-03T21:36:21+00:00

Please approach us!!

Far-Difference6591 · 2021-12-03T21:54:09+00:00

What men would really benefit from, is tips, tutorial on tht correct way to approach a gal like you? The proper space to give so a gal doesn't feel cornered. That we need to be direct, respectful, confident, smile.

To not be focused on scoring the number, but just having a nice, positive interaction with another human being that we fancy.

Guys? Not succeeding when trying? Doesn't mean you/ we failed, or mean you have to get pissed. They is Not what's up. Very often, No doesn't mean she's not interested.

She could be happy in a relationship, in between figuring out the one she is in?, Just got out of a long term and wants some time, space. Not in a good mental and or physical space for dating? Work, school stress? We Don't have to take No so personally.

No thanks can mean not right now. Gotta Stop menacing women when they say no.

Realistic_Status · 2021-12-04T04:25:12+00:00

i do but you all flake. theres no hope. its women that dont value men approaching them. maybe because you girls get it from many guys everyday. such as tinder,fb instagram etc etc. you girls are blessed you can get the d anytime you girls want.

caracers510 · 2021-12-03T21:12:10+00:00

Will I end up with you if I try? 😏

bholeezus · 2021-12-03T22:15:53+00:00

Appreciate your post, sometimes we get in our heads because we live in a disconnected world due to tech. Also, coming off as creepy seems to be another detterant. But, usually, physical contact a brush on the arm or touch of the hand are great indicators of interest that I have noticed. Anyways, if you smiled and waved at me in SoCal. We'd be going to D-land real quick. (Disneyland)

ShredableSending · 2021-12-03T23:33:50+00:00

So I gotta say, that only time someone compliments me on my looks, they're typically someone's grandma. The couple times that weren't, married women. I feel like I'm not the slowest guy out there, but I'd be shocked if someone came on to me in public, probably wouldn't know what to say.

Personally, I see quite a few pretty women on a daily basis. But I'm driven by personality first, looks are 1a. And it's not possible to get to know a personality within the 30s a pickup line usually lasts.

Hope you find someone to connect with!

2021-12-03T23:45:15+00:00

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AVGVSTVS_OPTIMVS · 2021-12-04T00:13:51+00:00

This. This is what I've always told other men when they ask me how to get a girlfriend. Just approach them. Don't care if they think it's creepy. If they're creeped out by a man approach them (how DARE us lol) then that's their problem.

But it'll help out alot if women started approaching us too.

averageguy4you4 · 2021-12-04T00:19:10+00:00

I'm glad I read your words cause every time I see a pretty girl I think she wants to mind her business and not being annoyed. They keep saying women are approached constantly, also in inappropriate ways, they made cat calling illegal and, even tho I wouldn't be inappropriate, it hinders me a lot!

socialanimal_us · 2021-12-04T00:29:56+00:00

Trying to solve that and people not meeting generally at www.YouTube.com/socialanimal - I am always looking for people to do my subscriber challenge if anyone is interested ;)

blunt_eastwood · 2021-12-04T01:10:33+00:00

You wanna go out?

enzotoretto · 2021-12-04T02:11:01+00:00

I got you 😎

livinin82 · 2021-12-04T02:44:08+00:00

Hi…do you come here often?

roakmamba · 2021-12-04T03:37:49+00:00

Wanna go out?

yuckyuck13 · 2021-12-04T03:56:53+00:00

I think this has to do more with fear and societal judgement. I'm in total agreement with your post though. Some interaction will go well, some won't. It's all a learning experience and how will anyone learn if they don't make the attempt. And the majority of women are totally cool with a simple chat up. So why not make the attempt even if its a loss. It's a learning experience. Some, maybe most, just don't have the gall to do it.

RapTVCalifornia · 2021-12-04T03:59:01+00:00

I’m Sorry I will never approach women again

K_Sleight · 2021-12-04T04:00:53+00:00

Frankly, I scare people, and have no idea how to make an appropriate approach.

Chad_Thundermember · 2021-12-04T04:01:00+00:00

You're a breath of fresh air, lady-OP.

dark-_-thoughts · 2021-12-04T05:21:57+00:00

Honestly I don't assume women have significant others unless they tell me they do or they're wearing a ring. What I do assume is unless they are staring at me they don't care one way or another about me. And me approaching them it's not appropriate. You got to remember guys do not understand signals and convert signs.

2021-12-04T06:59:38+00:00

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2021-12-04T08:30:05+00:00

In this day in age men are so scared to even breath next to a woman due to any move being sexual harassment or being called a creep. Especially hot women. Don't wait on a man to approach you, you'll be waiting forever. Women have to make the first move. Thank the modern feminists for that one. Woman up and get out there. It's like a lioness on the hunt. Have fun with it. Plus it keeps you in control of the encounter.

Ill-Entrepreneur7400 · 2021-12-04T10:51:38+00:00

For me personally, approaching girls has been fun and positive (after you get over the initial fear) even if they wouldn't give me their Instagram or number, it was still a good experience. Sure, we have some outliers that want to make you feel like what you've done/doing is wrong and that you should feel ashamed, but don't let them stop you guys, because there is a girl like op that's just waiting for a guy like you to walk into her life.

bloopblapbleep · 2021-12-04T10:57:39+00:00

Lol one day it’s “approach us” next day it’s “don’t approach us do you know how scary it is?”

twa8u · 2021-12-04T13:31:25+00:00

Why dont you APPROACH MEN since its YOU who wants a relationship? First of all, who knows you're "PRETTY" and you're telling men OWE you a relation bcoz you THINK YOU'RE PRETTY. Come on, grow up. If you want the job you want, education want you want then better WORK for the relationship you want.

Comradecraig · 2021-12-04T14:11:37+00:00

100% chance this account is a man. Women despise having men approach them in public when they're just trying to go about their business.

icanchi · 2021-12-04T14:50:58+00:00

This is a man. Or a woman with serious attention issues.

A_solo_tripper · 2021-12-04T14:58:16+00:00

The dating market will tell you how pretty you are. Not trying to diss you or put you down. But, stateside, if you are pretty, you are getting approached, catcalled, free drinks, asked out, etc.

Hell, even not pretty women get asked out. When was the last time you spoke with a man?

player89283517 · 2021-12-04T15:09:08+00:00

We don’t assume you have a bf we’re afraid you’ll think we’re harassing you

ha_ku_na · 2021-12-04T15:13:35+00:00

Seriously, this is 2021, ask out the guys you like instead of waiting around.

2021-12-04T15:23:51+00:00

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Mr_Wazanskiiii · 2021-12-04T15:38:06+00:00

I appreciate the encouragement, really. I don't have too much of an issue if I'm waiting for something next to her and she isn't closed off, which is pretty easy to tell if she is. It helps if something is going on to comment on that isn't part of or hanging off her body, but I have commented on shoes or something similarly innocuous. But basically she was right there to talk to and was probably pretty open and smiley, or trust me, I wouldn't have had the courage. So making that opener is fine. However, it's the picking my ass up and moving across the room to do the same thing that I find impossible. Even if the signals are there. I don't know what it is. I know I'm always fine after I get past, "Hi.", assuming she engages, but... I don't know. I know the advice is to not think but act, but it's just that 8 seconds from my seat to hers where my stomach climbs into my nostrils. Anyway. I wonder if others aren't like me, where they could climb a lower bar, but literally approaching a woman is our Everest. Especially one as beautiful as you are.

I do understand you don't want to do all the work but maybe setting us morons up for success a bit more to where we can take over simply by closing the proximity gap might be an interesting experiment.

P.s. now that I wrote out the way I've been able to strike up a conversation in the past I'm feeling kind of funny about it. I guess I'm more or less said that I'm able to say hi when I have a captive audience... 😬 But they weren't. It wasn't the barista. It really is when we're waiting to order a beer, or waiting for our floofy coffee drinks to come up. And again, I don't think I've ever asked for a number this way.

KND_DNK · 2021-12-04T18:16:10+00:00

Make sure to make it obvious you find us attractive!!!

According-Mobile-993 · 2021-12-04T18:22:29+00:00

I mean it’s pretty insane that your first course of action is to blame men for your loneliness. Look at how lost you are when a man doesn’t approach you. If a man acted like you you’d be like “omg he’s so insecure”. Just that little bit of work and you’re screaming “men approach usssss” maybe you know now why they’re tired and don’t want to approach you.

BradleyX · 2021-12-04T23:16:48+00:00

I’d approach you, you’re hot!

Fr4nko_ · 2021-12-05T08:40:26+00:00

Why dont you approach? girls are so funny thinking guys should approach

Srivastava123321 · 2021-12-04T02:34:50+00:00

Maybe because you are a single mother post-wall ?

KingOfTheNorthern · 2021-12-03T23:23:55+00:00

Hahaha after being rejected thousands of times, why the hell would I do that again?

okcomput3r · 2021-12-04T08:26:11+00:00

I’m from the UK where approaching a stranger and talking to them is viewed as a cardinal sin unfortunately

jreddittwice · 2021-12-03T19:24:45+00:00

I think it is possible you are intimidatingly hot, and that may be your challenge. Some women (like I see my wife) are so sexy or ooze such sex appeal that the little head interferes with higher processing and I think that is a skill necessary to negotiate the waters of seduction.

Thanks for this though, it is a great reminder that leagues have a lot more overlap than we think.

Global-Bridge-6787 · 2021-12-04T03:06:50+00:00

Nope feminist has ruined it for the rest of us. Plus when a guy does approach a girl then you immediately get freaked out and call him a creep. Most women do not want to get approached by a stranger. I will never do it because I could go to jail for even saying hi to a girl

RainbowChardonnay · 2021-12-03T21:18:11+00:00

Wow. So much pushback on this woman’s request to men on a sub about how to seduce women to actually approach a woman. You men are mystifying.

LongLiveMacdre · 2021-12-04T02:00:20+00:00

Approaching most women nowadays isn’t worth it, end of story.

mrrooftops · 2021-12-04T16:27:03+00:00

Fishing for compliments and attention.

2021-12-03T20:37:08+00:00

Honestly it all depends on where you are at. There's usually a time in place for men to approach women. Most men lack some form of capacity to cold approach.

ramb0285 · 2021-12-03T21:46:38+00:00

No u

ramb0285 · 2021-12-03T21:47:42+00:00

No u

AstronautCrash · 2021-12-03T22:32:02+00:00

You in AZ? Cause I would try to talk to you in a heartbeat if I saw you.

YetzirahToAhssiah · 2021-12-03T22:47:10+00:00

The more attractive the woman, the more enormous and terrifying the BF

Complex-Indication · 2021-12-03T23:34:53+00:00

Hey, /u/bridgetthebanker ! You look stunning and thanks for that bit of motivation from your post. I'd totally strike a conversation with you, if we were in somewhat approachable radius lol. Don't listen to ppl saying you or other girls should approach "a million times".

JackTheRipper_17 · 2021-12-04T00:31:45+00:00

Hey u/bridgetthebanker, how's it going? You look really pretty and friendly too, so I wanted to say hi :)

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-12-03T21:03:14+00:00

You remind me of a girl I work with. She is cute and desperate to be put in some cuffs and ropes and have her brains fucked out of her head. But I think she may give off a bit of a desperate vibe to guys, cause they don't approach her. Maybe just be more indifferent and rub one off at home before you go out.

kbecel · 2021-12-03T22:43:21+00:00

Guys. Listen to this girl and stop being pussies. They want to be approached. Don't be afraid to fail once in a while

2021-12-03T21:26:56+00:00

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bholeezus · 2021-12-03T21:54:56+00:00

Appreciate your comment, sometimes we get in our heads and think that we are coming off as creepy even though it's the most natural way to meet people. Kind of funny we're told as kids to be wary of strangers then as adults we need to interact with strangers. Anyways, if you were in SoCal and you approached with a smile and wave we'd be going to D-land real quick. (Disneyland)

davedude97 · 2021-12-03T22:02:18+00:00

Hey! let's go out on a date 😏

Mmm91for · 2021-12-03T22:41:38+00:00

What’s the best way to seduce a milf?

SchmidFactor · 2021-12-03T23:34:14+00:00

Thanks for your post! What are some good places/settings to approach women? I am usually comfortable initiating and talking to women, but I work from home and don't get to spend much time at places where women hang out.

mynameizham · 2021-12-03T23:41:20+00:00

Do you go up to men?

ChefArtorias · 2021-12-03T23:44:11+00:00

Do you have intense RBF or something? You're hot, kind of surprising that you'd get a noticable lack of attention.

Revolutionary_Wind_8 · 2021-12-03T23:47:40+00:00

Well, I’ll be. honest here.

We’re afraid to approach you because of how horribly it could turn out in this day and age

merchant_of_mirrors · 2021-12-04T00:00:06+00:00

How about approaching you online? 😏

lana_del_reymysterio · 2021-12-04T00:00:42+00:00

Aside from starting conversations with guys, do you also give green light signals for them to approach or escalate with you?

Meaning like making eye contact from across the room and smiling, having an upbeat vibe when talking to them, directly flirting with them, touching them etc?

Hot_Role9647 · 2021-12-04T00:18:16+00:00

In your opinion, how would you want someone to approach you ? Like what is something you would wanna hear when a man approaches you

alienStarDawg420 · 2021-12-04T00:18:23+00:00

Where are you located? I wonder if the city/setting plays a role in this

MauPow · 2021-12-04T00:45:09+00:00

no u

WeCanDoThis74 · 2021-12-04T01:02:19+00:00

I casually flirt with girls all the time, but they always brush it off as friendly. I hesitate to ask girls on dates because I never know what to say or do on the dates.

edit for context

the-wifes-bf · 2021-12-04T01:38:22+00:00

Approach you? Alright, here’s me shooting my shot. Let’s go for drinks

Altruistic_Field2134 · 2021-12-04T01:46:57+00:00

OP I do not know why your getting such hostile comments from dudes when all you were trying to do is just say "hey some women like to be approached and you should not be afraid". Your doing gods work so have my upvote!

ConstantPeak1816 · 2021-12-04T01:59:01+00:00

I always ask myself: "is she out of my league?" Thats why im single

Avidestroyer · 2021-12-04T02:13:16+00:00

How you doing¿

Eobardthawne89 · 2021-12-04T03:08:36+00:00

Let me see you. 🧐🧐

Oriential-amg77 · 2021-12-04T03:14:35+00:00

Bro groups of women, 2-7 are the most approachable, couples are just fodder for throwing cheesy pick-up lines at the guy/gal.

FaithInStrangers94 · 2021-12-04T05:34:27+00:00

How would you like a guy to come up and talk to you?

I’ve tried a bunch of different approaches and none are received real well

glenmorangie_brain · 2021-12-04T06:33:54+00:00

I'm curious, but where do you socialise?

vinnievu141 · 2021-12-04T06:50:53+00:00

I wish it was that easy to ask you out, but I need to establish good relations with your friends there and comfort and rapport and flirts before I can reach that stage. I am still trying to get those down.

adsq93 · 2021-12-04T08:47:11+00:00

I get what OP is saying.

Just talk anything to any girl. It can be the silliest topic ever. Even if you gain nothing from it, just do it.

I talked to a random girl at Marshalls. Just said that I genuinely like on of her tattoos. We talked for like 15 minutes. She gave me her phone number.

VDKay · 2021-12-04T10:34:10+00:00

Approach Us!!!

"... So I can get all the validation I need, feel better about myself, and eventually have more dating options (statistically higher-quality men), even though I'll still opt for my abusive ex the moment he texts me."

Jokes apart, if not for game and humor, you would reject 99% of people in this sub no matter how desperate you are.

Let us do our work here! We are trying to get better at flirting and socializing in general so we can keep carrying the conversations for lazy-ass people. If you want more men in your life, go out there and meet them and approach them yourself. You have the tools right in this sub. Sounds scary? Oh! You bet!!

Placher1 · 2021-12-04T12:28:23+00:00

Ok let's go out 🙃😂

Equivalent_Ad7389 · 2021-12-04T13:58:43+00:00

I cold approached a girl at the store today. Looked at her and said "Have we met"? She said "I don't think so." I replied "Well I think we should meet." She immediately smiled and said I have a boyfriend. So I said but you want to upgrade right. She laughed. I said "what happens when he breaks your heart?" That's where I come in. Then I said I'm just messing with you, have a good day. You have to be playfully persistent, not needy persistent. Have some confidence in yourself and assume she wants you, but she just might be unavailable.

The women worth approaching deserve to be approached. I honestly hate it women approach me, not that it ever happens much, but it feels too easy like you didn't earn it. Rejection feels good, it's like you leveled up.

So yeah I believe you. Sometimes men are afraid to approach really attractive women though. They just automatically tell themselves they aren't good enough or she's probably married.

Don't listen to any of these dudes saying you need to approach, they're just being pussies and are too afraid to approach women. Men need to learn to be comfortable with rejection, and the only way to get that is by doing it. Any girl worth it is going to be a little bit of a challenge, it's just a shit test, or compliance test, and you'll feel so good about it.

Being okay with rejection and the tension of approaching, with a "meh" attitude is highly desirable by women.

Theory_Agile · 2021-12-04T15:19:56+00:00

Some men are just tired of dating, usually a pretty girl means shes obsessed with her self and all she is really looking fornis free attention and validation from men. On the othet hand most girls will say men are creeps and always bugging them, is it a surprise guys arent approaching you? I recommend you take yout own advice and shoot your shots.

2021-12-04T15:52:47+00:00

Why don’t you ask out?

malcolm_reyn0lds · 2021-12-04T17:20:51+00:00

Theres tons of guys approaching you, just not the ones you want to lol. And you are probably with your kid, so that would be kinda weird..

SnooObjections4345 · 2021-12-04T17:21:41+00:00

It should be equal. I’m jealous of you girls. You can go to a club and the guys just come to you. That never happens to men.

Aerial_penguin · 2021-12-04T17:42:21+00:00

How young of guys are you looking towards?

Nearby_Advance7443 · 2021-12-04T17:47:17+00:00

This. It’s on my mind to make doing so more of a constant priority. I’ve just been pretty socially awkward most of my life. I make up for it by acting like a clown (to varying degrees of success). But I’ve grown a lot in recent years and it occurs to me that if I master inner and outer game that I’m an ideological package. Right now I’m about to do a big cross-country move where I know no one, and I’m not great at juggling too many big objectives, so I’m not focusing on this that much. But after I get settled, this is one of my biggest goals in the next chapter of my life.

And looking at your profile, you’re fucking gorgeous. Not having a boyfriend makes you more approachable, but having one would make taking you out or into my place all the more fun (lol I identify how Bond originally said to Vesper that she wasn’t his type because she was single).

cory7990 · 2021-12-04T17:49:47+00:00

And say what? What is an appropriate way to approach a situation of asking out a total stranger based on nothing but there looks?

2021-12-04T18:23:18+00:00

I tried to, way back. Crippling approach anxiety always held me back. So... yeah sorry, as much as I'd love to, I just can't.

omegam4n · 2021-12-04T18:51:15+00:00

Well if you wanted male attention you posted in the right place.

2021-12-04T19:26:49+00:00

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2021-12-04T20:39:40+00:00

Yea please approach us

2021-12-05T07:00:44+00:00

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Alpharettaraiders09 · 2021-12-06T11:33:52+00:00

Bc a lot of men are afraid of rejection and need you to let us know when your interested. One thing ive learned over the years, is A LOT of pretty women dont get approached bc we as men dont want to get rejected and or too intimidated by how attractive you are and "we arnt your type".

Shoot your shot. Rejection is all about how you react and can handle it. Hurts at first, walk it off, and approach the next.

getyahfuckingyeeted · 2021-12-06T19:45:03+00:00

why cant women ask men out?

Title	Approach Us!!!
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	835
Comments	479
Date	December 3, 2021 6:47 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/r864gb/approach_us/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/approach-us.1271337 https://theredarchive.com/post/1271337

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