The only men getting consistent action are men with no/ loose standards

idrinkapplejuice42 · 2021-06-13T22:19:20+00:00

I get a feeling this is part of the reason I have trouble. Im not looking for the perfect girl, but Im not into girls who smoke/vape, are lowkey drug addicts, who wear excessive makeup, who are fat, etc. I honestly think this rules out most single women.

Ormriss · 2021-06-13T21:25:15+00:00

I would agree in part. Maybe not the 'only men' but men with lower standards can typically sleep around more.

I have a friend who is 31-32 that I was a little jealous of, as I am coming up on almost a year with no dates while he is often deciding between two or three women at a time. He finally showed me pictures of these women and it was a bit jarring. The ages were all over the place, from 18 to 55. Some were considerably overweight, most I would not have given a second look. Maybe two out of the ten or so he showed me were what I would consider attractive, and one of those was married and cheating. He had no intentions of having a relationship with any of these women, and in fact, he broke it off with one woman (the 55-year-old) with the excuse that he wanted to have kids and a 'real' relationship one day.

I've also seen one co-worker's father go from woman to woman. He's addicted to crack, to give you an idea of his status. He has also fathered 32 children (so far).

TLDR: trashy men will sleep with whatever woman will have them.

Weary-Invite1606 · 2021-06-13T22:19:55+00:00

Idk what no/loose standards mean.

Men who get consistent action are mostly in LTRs tbh. Casual sex/dating isn’t really as common as people think because most people who are single aren’t having sex.

Given this, most men who are in LTRs are there because their SO meets all their standards and more, whether they be loose/tight. They’ve worked hard to cultivate a strong, solid, equitable/happy relationship that works for them and that typically requires a partner of high quality.

So what I’m getting at is, how much action you get consistently doesn’t really depend on the quality of your partner because most people who get consistent action are in LTRs.

wtknight · 2021-06-13T17:34:30+00:00

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Flightlessbirbz · 2021-06-14T01:34:44+00:00

Being okay with being with someone who isn’t an 8+ isn’t “no/loose standards” since the vast majority of people are 4-6. No reason to think you should be able to get with someone far above your looksmatch. But yes, having high standards in comparison to where you personally stand is a good way to be single and not get laid. Is that actually surprising? Everyone is entitled to their standards, but no one should be surprised if they don’t get what they want when they’re too high. And yes, as a man, you will have more frequent sex with a better looking woman in a relationship than you will with casual sex because more women want relationships than casual sex.

cowfishAreReal · 2021-06-13T18:48:32+00:00

You know that when women are unavailable they're usually dating someone right, witch means those women youre talking about are dating, mostly men

Zombombaby · 2021-06-13T22:25:11+00:00

Technically you have more sex inside a marriage than when you're dating or single. As a married woman, can confirm.

Creation_Soul · 2021-06-13T21:33:04+00:00

If you are talking about casual sex (with multiple partners), I would agree. If you are talking about all sex, then no.

I have a Chad cousin (with good success on dating apps) and while he has had sex with way more women, in terms of raw sex numbers I have the "advantage". Sure all that sex is had with only one woman inside an LTR, but I am not complaining. Why my raw numbers are higher is because I get no "downtime" or "dry spells".

xFallacyx69 · 2021-06-13T21:33:30+00:00

Nothing wrong with having crazy monkey sex with a chick you don’t plan on marrying while you’re between relationships…

International_Care14 · 2021-06-13T18:42:49+00:00

I made a chadfish with Tyler Maher, in the bio I wrote I was jobless, and had hot ass women begging for sex within 2 hours.

Top tier men can have all the standards they want, they fuck a lot, and a lot of hot women. Also, if you don't fuck a ton of hot women, you aren't top tier or Chad.

https://vimeo.com/437187273

This is 6'5 Tyler Maher btw, if you don't look like that don't say you're a Chad.

Five_Decades · 2021-06-13T23:08:40+00:00

If you're in the top echelons of men you can have whatever standards you want and get lots of sex and options.

If you're an average man, you can (probably) get a lot of sex if you're willing to do it with women who are 1-3s or if you're willing to be with slutty, damaged women.

Maxarc · 2021-06-14T00:31:07+00:00

Research has proven men have looser standards in general for women. (See swipe app data).

This seems to be true for sex. However, keep in mind that dating app data is very skewed because of the male to female disparity. This market dynamic allows women to be way more picky. There also was a study in where they had women on these apps rate men on their looks, which was brutal but unhelpful for general claims too, because again: the skewed supply and demand creates a suction effect for picky women. More lenient women either don't need the app to find a partner, or quickly disappear from the app; while the picky ones remain and can stay there because they get countless matches until they find the right person. This makes the data unhelpful for broader claims, because the study has a bias towards women that are already prone to being picky.

I noticed that people on this sub sometimes use motivated reasoning as a way to underpin their beliefs (this is not pointed at you specifically O.P, maybe you have other data too). When they find dating app data the narrative usually goes something like: "I knew it! Even the dating app data shows it." But there are more dynamics at play that need to be considered. We can never get good broader data from these app studies because of that gender disparity. What these studies tell us is more narrow, namely: how women and men behave on these apps specifically, but not in general or in real life. To prove this claim we need studies that analyse how women behave outside of these apps in a balanced environment with equal gender distribution. Because people adjust their standards to their environments and situations.

midwesternMD · 2021-06-13T19:30:11+00:00

Depends on how you define “no/loose.” I get somewhat consistent action (prepandemic, of course. Though admittedly my dating app activity is heating up this summer.)

I have standards. Single mothers, smokers, women who appear fat… I pass on all of them.

I’ve learned that single mothers get clingy when they learn about my career (and ostensibly what I can materially “provide”). That makes even good casual sex with them not worth the headache.

I’ve been with a fat woman once. I had to fake an orgasm to extricate myself from her place. Never. Again.

Smokers have always been disgusting to me. In fairness, I’ve never dated one. Tolerating the smell of a smoker/patient is trying enough, and that’s my job. Hell if I’m going to willingly subject myself to that on a date.

CrackLover420 · 2021-06-13T19:31:00+00:00

So you hardly have any experience with relationships, but insist on having high standards?

Super-Peoplez-S0Lt · 2021-06-13T18:09:29+00:00

It's more of a scarcity issue a lot of men have. When you have little to no options, you're more than willing to accept anyone available.

SmurfESmurferson · 2021-06-13T23:19:32+00:00

You guys always forget about the good looking guys who are there for a good time - not scheming assholes, guys with morals who aren’t looking to be dicks. Sex is part of a good time

ThatAdvantage6989 · 2021-06-13T18:27:26+00:00

We have to have loose standards because women are generally incapable of meeting reasonable standards

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Naus1987 · 2021-06-13T22:32:09+00:00

I think standards is too vague a term for your argument.

I find it pretty plausible that good looking men with high standards in beauty are able to find pretty women to sleep with if the only standard for a fling is they look pretty, lol.

If a pretty guy is just looking for sex then there’s no reason to have an emotional/intellectual standard when searching for a fling partner.

—-

With that said, I still do believe that ugly men can absolutely find ugly women to sleep with. I think both genders tend to have higher standards than themselves, but it is true that lowering standards does open up more opportunities for sex.

Still, as an asexual person myself—the whole idea of only wanting sex from a person is beyond confusing. I’ve done “teh sex,” and it’s not as life changing as people make it out to be, lol.

Sometimes I wonder if being ace is just a blessing in disguise ^{.^}

OnlineProfile69 · 2021-06-13T23:40:23+00:00

I think you just have to be realistic about your own SMV. All men are sexually attracted to Hot girls but not all men are Hot guys. If you're a Hot guy you're gonna be able to get laid with those Hot girls pretty regularly, being that you have some form of "game" as they call it. If you're not a Hot guy you need to be more realistic and "lower" your standards. Maybe shoot for an LTR. In my experience pretty girls are more likely to have sex with a guy not quite on her looks level in a committed relationship.

DireLiger · 2021-06-14T01:08:12+00:00

Most men want an 8+ lookwise?

What are you?

pussandra · 2021-06-14T01:39:49+00:00

With your dating app example, is it not more likely that women just spend more time and money on appearance? The average woman is objectively more attractive than the average man. And those males that try are often trying to reach some arbitrary marker of masculinity rather than appeal to what women actually want to see. Plus yall are terrible at taking photos....

violetskies7 · 2021-06-14T03:03:16+00:00

as a woman, i don’t really understand the rating scale. don’t different men find different things and different women attractive? how can someone be an 8 across the board?

it makes me wonder what i would be. not that i really care, but it’s curious. my boyfriend would say i’m beautiful, a ten even. i’d say i’m beautiful, but i wouldn’t want to put a number on it.

riches2rags02 · 2021-06-15T05:09:45+00:00

Are you saying you're consistently single or you don't manage LTRs very well? It's not clear. I'm going to assume you mean you rarely land a date because you're picky. Anyways, I think we basically agree with eachother so let me just give my two cents:

The average man "swipes right on apps" a lot because he has no power/value and the cards are stacked against him.

The above-average man (TBH, the creme of the crop) doesn't need to "swipe right" nearly as much as the average man to score a match. They can afford to have "tighter standards" yet still achieve a higher success rate than the average man with "looser standards".

Tinder "swipe data" is not an accurate representation of reality. So that's why the apps are broken, not why dating in general is broken.

You can try to rationalize that the average dude just needs to "not give a F" and he'll get consistent action, but I don't believe it's that simple. Most guys aren't getting consistent action. But, technically, you are correct on average: if a man targets below his looks/status-match more often, he's bound to get more action. Pure economics.

I think you're trying to highlight the issue that some (or most) men don't shop below their personal standards very often and lock themselves out of consistent action. I know I've passed up numerous opportunities for superficial, selfish reasons.

Ultimately, the man who can get truly consistent action without needing to compromise his standards is, like you stated in your OP, the 90th/95th percentile man.

It's more or less a crap shoot for everyone else.

cockandbaltorture · 2021-06-13T17:31:51+00:00

orrrrr.... genetics predetermines your ability to get matches for casual sex and you can have little to no changes on that? Girls weigh everything in an LTR, while throwing all those standards out in favor of looks for casual. If you don’t have those standards, you go to LTR for attractive girls.

Idesmi · 2021-06-13T20:25:21+00:00

You are right. It's just not worth it if you have to lower your standards.

boomershack · 2021-06-13T21:07:31+00:00

Standards? It is 2021 bro, just smash and live your life.

wtknight · 2021-06-13T18:11:38+00:00

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a14deadpool · 2021-06-13T20:59:00+00:00

Depends on what you mean by loose standards. I am picky too but when it comes to looks that’s it. When it comes to personality it doesn’t really matter that much. So yeah I have low standards for personality but high standards for looks.

midwestufohunter · 2021-06-13T17:38:04+00:00

So... men who actually like women? 😂

wtknight · 2021-06-13T18:36:01+00:00

[removed]

Starphysics · 2021-06-13T23:08:50+00:00

I have high standards and get laid all the time.

infps · 2021-06-14T01:29:53+00:00

Not the only men, but the men I have known who had the highest non-prostitute "N-counts" also had the highest prostitute N-counts almost always a little higher than the non-prostitute counts.

There's a lot to the vibe that you aren't gonna make more out of this or get all soppy and starry eyed or clingy or whatever. You wanna fuck, girl wants to fuck, it really can be easy, but it needs to be fucking easy.

LMM-GT02 · 2021-06-14T08:09:56+00:00

You have more options banging busted chicks and breaking hearts.

Why does it got to be like this?

throwawaythis2020 · 2021-06-14T09:54:30+00:00

Most guys get with 4-high 6 (not quite a 7) & tell themselves they’re 8+ lol I see it all the time

manfrom-nantucket · 2021-06-14T14:57:54+00:00

When looking for sex the only standards a man has to worry about is that she doesn't have a disease.

When looking for commitment however those standards kick in.

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2021-06-14T19:32:29+00:00

Duh.

Willow-girl · 2021-06-14T13:51:35+00:00

My boyfriend jokes that he had a four-page test to administer to prospective girlfriends, but I skipped it by passing the oral exam.

Title	The only men getting consistent action are men with no/ loose standards
Author	onlyfacts_nofans
Upvotes	87
Comments	310
Date	June 13, 2021 5:20 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/nz170b/the_only_men_getting_consistent_action_are_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/the-only-men-getting-consistent-action-are-men.782538 https://theredarchive.com/post/782538

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