What's your opinion on men who are older than 30 dating women who are 18 to 25 in age?

LupeDyCazari · 2022-12-15T05:05:13+00:00

I don't see anything abnormal about a 30 year old man dating a 25-28 year old woman.

It's a bit different when she's 18 and the guy is in her 30s, obviously because more often than not, she's doing it out of desperation, either guys her own age don't want her, or she is in dire financial stripes and she needs all the help she can get, so she dates an old man.

And no, most middle-aged men, that is to say, most men who are in their 30s do not age like Keanu Reeves, Brad Pitt, Chris Hemsworth or Henry Cavill, so the chances of a random middle-aged guy being attractive enough still to get the sexual attentions of a 18-22 year old, attractive woman, are pretty slim.

Ok-Map-7596 · 2022-12-15T04:11:24+00:00

What's your opinion on the fact that women date men around the same age as them and 30-year old trying to hit on an 18-year old girl will most likely be rejected?

EugeneCezanne · 2022-12-15T05:01:14+00:00

I mean nobody needs my stamp of approval to date.

That said as someone who is 23 years old everything about dating a guy that age seems like a horrible idea. And if a friend ever directly asked my opinion on it then and only then would I tell her my reservations about it.

FckItDog · 2022-12-15T05:24:04+00:00

If I see a 30yo dating someone younger than 21, ill basically assume he only wants her for sex, I can't think of anything else that someone so young could bring to the life of a 30yo man. Fine by me if its consensual, but I can't believe he loves her and that their relationship is serious.

hypotenoos · 2022-12-15T04:14:14+00:00

Plenty of 18-25 women with a kid…or a couple.

KlingKlangKing · 2022-12-15T06:04:24+00:00

This is mainly a pipe dream though. Most 30+ dudes will get rejected by women this young

Coolio_Street_Racer · 2022-12-15T05:11:33+00:00

I feel like 23-30 is more suitable age range. 18-23 are just formative years and people are not fully developed.

Plus a high age gap relationship has much higher probability of divorce. Along with getting married when your young.

I'd say just find a women who is around 25 years old that you are attracted to and compatible with.

I think if you find someone who is a "perfect match" that is 18-23. It's a little better. But if your actively pursing women because of their young age, that is not socially acceptable.

2022-12-15T09:14:30+00:00

There's a massive difference between being 30 and dating a 25 year old, and being a 35 year old who actively pursues teenagers. The latter is totally creepy, I don't care if that's not considered politically correct on this sub. I thought it at 18 and I think it now. You literally admit in your post it's because you can't get women your age, if you can't get women your age I don't know why yiu think you can get teenagers.

BigZaddyZ3 · 2022-12-15T04:13:28+00:00

Isn’t 18 to 25 a very big range in this scenario?

No one will care about a 30+ and 25 year old dating. (No one normal anyways…)

30+ dating an 18 year old is a rare scenario that’s mostly reserved for elite, higher status men anyways. (Aka the exceptions to the rule) It’s not really prevalent enough to stress over.

Also the woman in question is an adult and can make her own decisions in both cases so, who cares.

OkProfessional9405 · 2022-12-15T04:12:48+00:00

[permanently deleted]

cruciod · 2022-12-15T05:23:36+00:00

It's really weird if the woman is 18-19 and you'll get a lot of judgement from people like me. People at that age have barely made it into the adult world and are far more susceptible to being used and exploited by older people. Regardless there is like barely any middle ground between someone who's either still in highschool or just started uni and someone who's a 30yo.

Once women are in their 20s though I generally don't care. If you make a mistake because you dated an older guy then that's a mistake you just have to own and learn from.

BirdMedication · 2022-12-15T06:25:09+00:00

It's cringe, but that age gap is pretty much a reddit manosphere fairy tale. 20yo women don't want you lol.

Novadina · 2022-12-15T05:53:00+00:00

My husband was 30 and started dating me when I was 23… so I know at least some of them are fine and it doesn’t necessarily mean they have weird ideas about women. But of course some do, men vary a lot!

My husband is just kind of a late bloomer and we happened to fall in love after being friends - it’s not that he thinks women over 25 have “infected brains” or are ugly or that he would be able to use his additional income to his advantage somehow with younger women (he didn’t even make more money than me).

How do you feel when men are dating younger women?

Honestly I couldn’t care less who men date. I have opinions on men who go on about how much better teenagers are though, or how women their own age are hideous bitches. But if everyone is an adult their dating life is their business.

AilynCcasani · 2022-12-15T06:40:57+00:00

I’m very hypocritical about this I would say “I hate it” in a normal conversation but it’s something I (a 22yo) would do 🤪 lmao

chingness · 2022-12-15T13:44:29+00:00

When I was 16, I briefly dated a 24 year old. (No sex). I thought I was so cool and mature. I wasn’t. He was a creep. I ended it when I found him too pushy.

Youth is attractive - we know. It’s not an issue. Young men are hotter than old men too. Some older men age wonderfully - some badly Some older women age wonderfully - some badly

What a lot of men don’t understand is that the creepiness comes from specifically liking a woman for youth and not for the whole person. Or for taking advantage of a young person who hasn’t fully developed. Damn I thought I knew everything at 18/19 - didn’t we all? 😂

Older women warn younger women not because they are jealous or competing but because they also had experiences with older men when they were young and they didn’t end well for them.

That said - in the situations where both parties are definitely happy then go for it.

ziriani · 2022-12-15T14:33:41+00:00

I’m 20 and I wouldn’t. I like dating men closer to my age, and 4 years older is the highest I’ll go. Personally I instinctively don’t like it when I see it (one is after sex, the other money and something about how openly transactional it is puts me off) but it’s also none of my business. If they’re happy, they’re happy.

AngelxEyez · 2022-12-15T17:33:58+00:00

Men and women who are 18+ are allowed to dat who they please. I'm 25f and my bf is 24m.

My previous relationship was with a 32 year old when i was 22/23. I liked that i was "mature" enough for him, and i was attracted to him. It ended up being the most mentally draining and emotionally abusive situation I've ever been in in my life. it was awful, it took me months to get out of the confused mental fog he put me in. He was manipulative, I'm certain he had actual NPD, he love bombe me, then entirely switched up once he "had" me.

it was the more draining and awful time of my life. It took soo much willpower to escape. thank fucking god i did. he's no dating a girl i used to best friends with when we were younger. so she was 24 when they met, and 25 now. i feel soo bad for her. i know she's experiencing the same horrible manipulation and emotional abuse that I did.

I have a strong sense that ANY of the men on this sub 30+ trying to date 18-25 year olds would likely treat them the same way he treated me. reading this sub, its very likely that he followed content similar.

can a 30 year old treat a younger women right? sure, but its HIGHLY improbable/ nearly impossible that a man who spends time in places like this won't be treating the young women the same my ex treated me. Manipulation and mind game. precisely whats taught in these spaces.

Withholding attention to get what you want, literal silent treatment, dread game, negging, gas lighting, isolating me from friends, etc. left me feeling awfully confused, and took a lot of work to get right with myself once i escaped. i wouldn't wish that on ANYONE.

dukesaces · 2022-12-15T04:08:51+00:00

If they're both legal adults there is no problem with it. If women are allowed to have standards they themselves don't meet then so are men.

saraimarsena · 2022-12-15T04:30:10+00:00

my 34 year old ex boss used to date my extremely gorgeous 21 year old friend. he was very rich, fit, and conventionally attractive too. worked in sales so he knew how to socialize.

it was abundantly obvious though to everyone around that he’s extremely immature for his age, but hey, worked for them.

Wobblewobblegobble · 2022-12-15T04:35:02+00:00

These type of questions are pointless. Date whoever you can at any age.

lolthankstinder · 2022-12-15T05:03:28+00:00

The president of one of my dance clubs dated a guy in his 30s. They broke up and then she started hitting on me. She seemed super mature and had her shit together, so I assumed she was in grad school and around 24. Turns out she was 19!? And she knew I was 27 and was still hitting on me. Like damn she even knew how to look/act older. She knew exactly what she was doing...

Hating a man in an age-gapped relationship is demeaning for the woman who CHOOSE to be with him. She's not prey, she's a grown-ass adult. She can make her own damn choices. He's her prey for all we know.

2022-12-15T06:10:06+00:00

Mentally and emotionally, a 30yr old man is the equivalent of a 20yr old woman. This is the only way in which it makes sense.

redditmcx · 2022-12-15T06:20:45+00:00

Maybe it boils down to statistics and selection bias. Aka Who’s left/single. A successful man in their 30s who wants a partner might desire to find an amazing woman in her 30s but most of those women are taken. The good ones have had 10 years to date and had a multitude of options, and most likely will have settled down by then. So the only pool to draw from that isn’t picked clean is younger women who are still dating.

prizefighterstudent · 2022-12-15T06:34:28+00:00

I’ve been to LatAm and Asia. Friend groups / couples range in age from 18-35. As long as you’re fun, decent looking, and have something to offer, it’s a way more open environment. It’s the same in Europe from what I’ve heard. They don’t see it as some sort of “predatory” behavior by men — tons of chicks have dated older guys and seen it as either a positive experience or just normal.

It’s largely and almost exclusively a North American issue where people get uptight about age difference, namely older dudes and young women. They don’t care about the flip side at all, though. Older women are mature and empowered. Older men are predatory and “can’t get a girl their own age”. It is what it is.

LotBuilder · 2022-12-15T15:30:51+00:00

I think the gap between 18 and 25 is enormous for women. A 25 year old has been out of high school and experiencing adult life for 7 years. My opinion and experience is that 18-21 are still pretty much kids where a 24/25 year old woman can have a maturity level to connect with as a grown man.

TryLambda · 2022-12-16T00:17:08+00:00

They are smart !

lle-ell · 2022-12-16T15:09:02+00:00

Just depends on what each person wants to compromise on. People make trade-offs to get what they want.

I studied with a model-gorgeous girl who is now married to a 15 years older guy in IT (24 & 39 years when they married). He's good looking for his age, but still. My guess, from knowing her:

His thinking (probably) + she's super hot, highly educated, and young enough to have multiple kids with me - she's pretty selfish, got mental health issues and DEMANDS kids and to be a SAHM asap

Her thinking (probably) + he's rich and will take care of me when I have kids asap, and he's good looking for his age - he's a lot older

And they both decided that it was a good trade-off for them, apparently.

johnnyGotHisTabla · 2022-12-15T04:22:21+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Philosoferking · 2022-12-15T04:22:39+00:00

I see all too often how people say a man who is older has no business dating an 18 year old.

What they are saying is that the man is wielding his age, experiences and maturity, as a weapon to entice younger ignorant girls.

But what they fail to mention is there's plenty of girls who are chomping at the bit to be with an older guy.

In their minds he is probably still wrong for being with her even though she's doing the chasing. They believe the moral action is "sorry you're too young for me."

Aromatic_Shop9033 · 2022-12-15T04:53:58+00:00

It's positive because it's me. 😄

41, fiancé is 21.

puts on flamesuit

search4bigfoot45 · 2022-12-15T13:40:58+00:00

Younger women in their late teens and early 20s rarely date much older men outside of golddigger/sugar daddy type situations. They usually want hot guys their own age and think old men are gross. The Red Pill community acting like these age gap relationships are common shows how disconnected from reality they are.

SmarmyPapsmears · 2022-12-15T04:10:31+00:00

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alphasupremacy5555 · 2022-12-15T05:28:13+00:00

There's nothing wrong with it at all. Absolutely nothing wrong with it.

Women who are in the 18 to 25 age range are the sexiest and hottest women. They're not set in their ways and they're less likely to be heartbroken. The younger she is the lower body count is likely to be and are more likely to be wife material. They're also the most fertile so it's easier to have kids with them.

They are the prime age, the most marriageable age.

Impossible_You_8555 · 2022-12-15T04:36:32+00:00

Younger woman are awesome.

imissze90s · 2022-12-15T06:12:27+00:00

Men can't want younger women but women can want tall men, rich men, full head of hair men, etc.

2022-12-15T07:45:48+00:00

young women are creeped out by 30something baldies

Apprehensive_Cut_146 · 2022-12-15T07:06:26+00:00

Disgusting, but its bot my business

DisasterPeace7 · 2022-12-15T04:16:16+00:00

I got no problem with it obviously, if it makes them happy , so be it.

Especially if they hot ones, that's when the older bitter feminists REALLY get married lol

Que the " cHiLdReN", "pReDaTory" and "w0mEn thEir oWn aGe wAnt n0tHinG 2 d0 wiTh tHeM" crowd 🤣

NaturalBridge12 · 2022-12-15T04:58:02+00:00

That’s the goal

2022-12-15T07:53:48+00:00

I have nothing to add to the discussion as it's been hammered put innumerable times. Can't you use the search function?

Psych_FI · 2022-12-18T18:48:21+00:00

I’d find it strange but if they are consenting and strangers I’m going to mind my business. If it was my friend I’d raise my concern clearly and would be creeped out. I can’t imagine bringing a 30 + year old guy that’s go plenty going for him wanting to hang with gfs under 25. By around 24/25/26+ I wouldn’t bat an eyelid.

th30n34nd0nly0 · 2022-12-15T04:38:22+00:00

I see it all of the time. It makes sense. Why would a successful 35 year old man commit to a 35 year old woman? Women over 30 that are single generally aren't worth a damn.

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NockerJoe · 2022-12-15T04:25:44+00:00

The women incokved are co senting adults and can do whatever they like.

Radiant_Specific6542 · 2022-12-15T05:02:00+00:00

I think it's s none issue. The only people who have an issue are those who are extremely hateful ant ironically enough don't realize they are.

KayRay1994 · 2022-12-15T06:49:56+00:00

ah yes the age gap stuff again, if y’all are a similar enough stage in life and there isn’t a blatant power imbalance, go nuts. A 25 and 35 year old, for example, are more likely to be at a similar stage than a 30 and 20 year old.

Besides, more women are staying single longer and aren’t really settling till their 30s - so the excuse of “most are taken” is kinda becoming less true as time goes on

2022-12-15T07:37:43+00:00

18 and still in High School? Problematic for obvious reasons. 18/19 and out of high school? Go for it, though a good chunk will lack life experience/maturity/awareness and it's not in their best interest to date older people, this goes for guys with older women too. But like 20-ish+ have at it. They're gonna be mature enough to know what's up. Will they want a 30+ man? Probably not if you're not a millionaire, really hot, or a celebrity.

KingWhoCared86 · 2022-12-15T10:20:52+00:00

I feel kind of odd about it. I’m 36 and have a great connection with a girl who is 27 and the idea of a relationship was kind of turned off after finding out because I feel she’s too young for me.

januaryphilosopher · 2022-12-15T10:41:35+00:00

Surprised that she went for it for a start. Women that age aren't generally into men that age, and those who go for those kind of relationships generally have low self-esteem and/or were passed over by men their age. But I guess men who are still single at that age are leftovers in their own way. These relationships are rare. I'd also hope they were careful as these age gaps lead to significantly increased risks of various problems. I wouldn't recommend it, but I don't usually need to tell that to women my age who see it as gross anyway. Older men on the other hand often think it will work out fine, and then are surprised when it usually doesn't.

KekeSmall · 2022-12-15T11:05:48+00:00

That’s still a big range though. 30 yr old man dating a 25 yr old isn’t the same as him dating a 18 yr old.

SmilesLikeMardiGras · 2022-12-15T11:17:51+00:00

Jimmy Crack corn and I dont care

Stunning-Potato-1984 · 2022-12-15T12:49:02+00:00

For some reason Chacey Poynter comes to mind.

Long-Review-1861 · 2022-12-15T12:54:13+00:00

Good for them ?

Kstand22tv · 2022-12-15T13:06:44+00:00

18-25 is such a wide range of adulthood. There’s at least 3-4 different life stages in that range.

A 18 is fresh out of HS. A 25 year old could be married and already started their family and no one would trip.

SoIlikeMangos · 2022-12-15T13:15:02+00:00

I just like to know what the hell they have in common. As long as she's a consenting adult, who cares

Lyzard96 · 2022-12-15T15:01:07+00:00

My personal limit for an age gap is 10 years. So beyond that I do tend to get pretty judgemental and squicked out. 35 and 25 is not that big of a deal imo but 25 and 55 is disgusting.

ohdiddly · 2022-12-15T16:05:27+00:00

Couldn’t care less

HighestTierMaslow · 2022-12-15T16:16:28+00:00

A 30 yearold dating a 25 yearold is fine. I'd say younger than that though, mostly likely (theres always exceptions but they are exceptions)

They are:

-superficial

but more so

-need to be in control and wear the pants, they like to manipulate women but will probably get defensive about it if you call them out on it, they need to have everything their own way

They dont want an equal partnership.

Maleficent-Paint-343 · 2022-12-15T16:16:30+00:00

In the end who gives a fuck. Mainly on Reddit people have the guts to “voice their concerns”. I’ve met plenty of young women in their early 20s who say they don’t care about age, don’t mind 7+ years difference or say that they do care but eventually end up with a 30 year old because “it just happened”. In other words, they broke their own rules.

Women who spend their days shaming men on social media, real life or wherever aren’t an indicator of everyone’s opinion. Men will get rejected regardless of age, but what makes your success is persistence, value, confidence. Not age. The only reason statistically women date within their age group is because most men can’t be arsed to play the game long enough to find a girl out of their league.

launcelot02 · 2022-12-15T16:22:47+00:00

What is your opinion of 18 to 25 aged women dating older than 30 men?

I mean come on. For women it is the money and status that an 18 year old man can’t provide. And older men date younger girls for looks and fertility. It is a game as old as human civilization.

Teflon08191 · 2022-12-15T16:46:26+00:00

30 dating 18? Kinda weird.

30 dating ~22+? Perfectly normal.

What's the saying? Half your age plus 7?

feanoric · 2022-12-15T17:03:19+00:00

Dependapotamus209 · 2022-12-15T17:37:31+00:00

18 is legal age for any man

Ok_Raccoon8214 · 2022-12-15T18:42:51+00:00

As a bi woman (27) I find it mentally draining talking to almost men or women younger than me, there’s a disconnect in conversation and priorities and I’m not interested in that. I also prefer a more matured body and someone that knows who is more experienced sexually. I dated 10+ years older than me when I was 18 though, so I get it. Although the guys I dated then I see now we’re really lame and didn’t have the pull to date anyone worth while their age so I was an easy target.

PMmeareasontolive · 2022-12-15T18:52:39+00:00

I think MILF Island is a more likely future.

djmedicalman · 2022-12-15T19:42:09+00:00

Being one myself, I can tell you that we're fucking awesome.

Flightlessbirbz · 2022-12-15T19:45:55+00:00

Huge difference between 18 and 25, so I will give two answers. One for the 18-21 range, and one for 22-25. Dating someone who isn’t even old enough to drink legally when you are 25+, let alone 30+, yourself is just weird and creepy and tells me you’d probably also date an underage teen if you could get away with it. I don’t care what anyone says, there’s no way to make it seem okay or healthy.

Now for the 22-25 age group, it really depends. Some people this age are pretty mature, others are not. From the woman’s perspective, I would see it as a red flag if a 30+ guy was intentionally pursuing all/mostly women in this age group. If a friend or future daughter asked me what I thought, I would be honest that I think it’s a bad idea to date more than ~5yrs older in your 20s. But at that age, they are old enough to make their own choices in this regard.

TheMedsPeds · 2022-12-16T02:42:09+00:00

It really just depends and there is a huge difference between a dude in his 30's going after a woman closer to 25 than one going after one close to 18.

Guys who go after chicks, let's say under 21, just give off huge creep vibes. It's true that it's only natural that the older women get the less likely they are to be single, especially if they are worth a crap. But there really is no good reason to only look for chicks that young. I can only think of bad intentions (ignorant, less experienced, won't pick up on your red flags as easily) plus how a man over 30+ can emotionally connect to a woman who can't even buy a beer yet either means, he straight up doesn't give a shit about her personality (so shallow) or is REALLY emotionally immature himself.

As for the aging thing, in my experience this "woman old lady at 30" crap is purely a porn thing and a manosphere thing. As a 32-year-old woman, I don't find I really look THAT different than I did in high school and think the same thing about many of my peers. A person I work with (a woman) thought I was 23.

Do some of us rapidly age? Sure, but usually if we do that it's because we either had a few kids, smoke, do a lot of drugs, have extremely stressful lives, don't get sleep. If you stay in shape, don't have a bunch of kids, moisturize your face, avoid heavy drugs alcohol and smoking. You don't really start to look older until your mid 30s.

So if some dude IRL in his 30's says he doesn't want to date a 26-29 year old because "they aren't as hot as an 18-year-old" I think he's full of shit. If he said "well most women over 25+ aren't single and if they are there is probably a bad reason" that's one thing, and that's fine. But if it's strictly about her "not being as hot" I am raising an eyebrow hard.

Fearless_Trouble_168 · 2022-12-16T03:41:34+00:00

18 isn't 25.

I get why many men date younger. A 25yo woman, as you pointed out, is carefree and doesn't have life baggage yet.

But 18? She's a baby adult. There's a reason people side-eye guys in their 30s dating women that age. I knew an older guy dating an 18yo (and by dating I mean he had a sugar baby); he constantly complained the sex was terrible and she was immature.

Yeah, dude. You're "dating" someone who's barely had sexual experience and whining she's not a pornstar. You're dating a teenager and shocked she's not mature.

Humans have phases. Yes, it's normal to judge someone in the grown ass adult phase going for someone in the teenage phase. Every guy I've known who dates a teenager when he's 30+ is extremely emotionally immature and that's why he dates so young.

Again, 25, different story.

rosiivelvete · 2022-12-22T01:51:55+00:00

There is à huge différence between à 30 yo dating a 24-25 yo and an 18 yo. But otherwise i dont really care. Just hope he wont waste their youth if he's a predator.

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Title	What's your opinion on men who are older than 30 dating women who are 18 to 25 in age?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	7
Comments	300
Date	December 15, 2022 4:00 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/zmbj5i/whats_your_opinion_on_men_who_are_older_than_30/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/whats-your-opinion-on-men-who-are-older-than-30.1208120 https://theredarchive.com/post/1208120

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