When the mask comes off

Inthefullspectrum · 2021-06-09T10:53:08+00:00

“He says ‘his friends are paid costumers” “His friends are still here” Run, girl, run. Take the babies and never look back. That sounds awfully like a group r***** thread to me, I don’t care who calls me drama queen. Sadly, probably this woman has not social safety net to go to.

shelballama · 2021-06-09T10:16:41+00:00

Imagine being 22 and trapped with three kids and an abusive husband. I hope she has the strength and the support she needs to leave.

Bombs_ · 2021-06-09T10:25:13+00:00

"I'm ok with insults" excuse me?

thepinknotes · 2021-06-09T09:51:47+00:00

What kind of cancer of a person treats their spouse this way??

This uncouth jackass humiliating her at only 22 with THREE of his babies.

THIS is the hallowed SAHM honor that the manosphere says is better? This? She's trapped.

If you're a young woman and you found this post, for the LOVE OF GOD do NOT put your life in the hands of a man. Make sure that even if you end up a SAHM you have the skills so you can rely on yourself when these men show their ass.

Hope for the best and plan for the worst. 22?

No ma'am.

pancakeshoney · 2021-06-09T09:30:13+00:00

22/F

She probably sacrificed her education to get married to this manchild.

Platipus6 · 2021-06-09T09:33:25+00:00

Relevant once a week

curlywurlyprincess · 2021-06-09T09:34:18+00:00

Why has she not specified his age? He’s probably 7-8 years older.

Anyway the pandemic hasn’t turned him into ‘anything’. This is who he always was and now he’s comfortable enough to show it because she’s trapped with the kids. He will continue to pull stunts like this because he doesn’t respect her as an equal, he never did.

This is why it’s important to carefully choose the father of your kids.

Fuckdoesithurt956 · 2021-06-09T12:04:09+00:00

It's telling that he's not embarrased to admit to his friends that his wife doesn't enjoy sex with him. A normal man would be devastated by it, but he's not, and I guarentee it's because he's got a sidepiece giving him an ego boost.

Confused_One_ · 2021-06-09T09:28:53+00:00

This post is exactly why we never stop vetting, especially when a woman becomes a SAHM and sacrifices everything.

There’s so much subconscious victim blaming in her post, and she still believes things they can “talk things out.” It breaks my heart that this young woman has resigned herself to this life, and is willing to accept this abuse.

jupiterstef · 2021-06-09T09:42:49+00:00

men love humiliating women, i swear it’s one of their favourite hobbies.

AcadiaLeather5071 · 2021-06-09T09:36:09+00:00

Jesus Christ... Imagine being legally shackled to a LVM like that...

islandmaiden · 2021-06-09T10:42:16+00:00

Of course he hates you, no one who loves you will do something like that. He ain't normal

Lazy-Design1979 · 2021-06-09T11:16:02+00:00

Yeah, that's not funny...that is seriously abusive. What was he gonna do if his friends took him up on the rates thing? Pimp her out? To say nothing of the fact that even if this relationship is salvageable, his friends are going to see her as "available" after that performance because he's given them the green light. Guaranteed one of them forces themselves on her at some point. I'm afraid for her safety.

StrainingMyNeurons · 2021-06-09T10:19:29+00:00

Can someone direct this lovely lady here to see how much support she’s getting?

hopeful_flounder93 · 2021-06-09T11:17:43+00:00

How fast do you ladies think this scrote would get over himself if she straight-up left? Let him "sit on his ass" all day with their 4 kids?

Shit, even for a weekend. Just a few days to put him in his place. Would work WONDERS I bet

Edit: If you LITERALLY cannot trust your children's lives not to be in danger around a man, you need to get them away from said man. We shouldn't imply that she should stay to protect them. THEY ALL NEED TO LEAVE.

I'm not advocating for her to stick around while he jokes about gangraping her, and I'm not advocating for her and the kids to stay.

Otters-eating-tacos · 2021-06-09T11:34:01+00:00

This is what the manosphere wants

sleepysiri · 2021-06-09T11:03:14+00:00

He’s so cruel that she became accustomed to it.

catlady4u · 2021-06-09T11:18:55+00:00

Take your babies and leave him. I'm not sure what other advice there is to give.

You can't reason with and cOmMuNiCaTe with someone like this scrote. He despises women. It's going to escalate, and the kids will grow up learning abuse is normal.

I agree with others this is a significantly older scrote. This young woman may have gotten married to escape an abusive home life, frying pan > fire. I hope she reads about herself on FDS and finds the strength to leave.

pickmieshaexorcist · 2021-06-09T12:15:55+00:00

Hmmm she writes exactly like the poster we talked about yesterday whose husband demanded bjs after labiaplasty. Down to the random red hearts, refusing to respond to most replies and if she does respond, trying to rationalize the abuse.

Really don’t want to be That Guy (Lady?) but I’m a little suspicious? Or maybe this is so awful, I just want it to be fake, idk.

shelballama · 2021-06-09T10:29:37+00:00

What struck me was "I'm OK with insults." Why????????

And also that's she's pregnant again with this loser and is just 22 🤡

Would bet a lot that she has low self esteem/ was groomed. Homegirl needs to gtfo of there and fix her shit.

pickadaisy · 2021-06-09T12:20:19+00:00

She didn’t mistakenly say it’s a job. She does all the work and never comes.

She tried to stand up for herself and he found a way to remind her he sees her as his property. I…can’t.

Mcccy · 2021-06-09T13:02:44+00:00

And we all know he's at his 30s-40s. This creepy pedo just rushed to trap her with kids as soon as she hit 18. Wish she realises the situation she's in and leaves him before it's too late..

restlessGal · 2021-06-09T10:29:36+00:00

Imagine having children with a loser like this… God I feel so sorry for her, I hope she gets out

Phoenix__Rising2018 · 2021-06-09T10:30:22+00:00

"why does he treat me like this?"

BECAUSE YOU LET HIM.

Lets all take a bet on the age gap here too. I just don't even know how you let someone impregnate you twice by the age of 22.

FrenchHeel · 2021-06-09T13:18:36+00:00

4 under 4 at 22. Omg. I hope she can escape this abuser.

Watzoo · 2021-06-09T13:26:23+00:00

So hear me out: sleeping pills. Unisom has gel caps.

Nothing major, no harm. But if he’s snoring after dinner every night, that frees up a lot of her time to get the kids and her to bed. Maybe job hunt a little online. Collect herself in a quiet house every night and plan.

uaintshieeet · 2021-06-09T13:40:48+00:00

Fun fact: If American women earned minimum wage for the unpaid work they do around the house and caring for relatives, they would have made $1.5 trillion last year.

RabidWench · 2021-06-09T16:47:06+00:00

I think this world needs shelters for women like this. I know there are shelters for domestic violence victims, but I want there to be a gentle sanctuary where they can take time to get on their feet. Bring the kids, we'll help you find a job, resources, a new home. Does anyone provide this for women escaping emotional and financial abuse too? I am so sad for this woman.

munissa · 2021-06-09T13:44:34+00:00

She’s defending the piece of trash. He’s definitely much older and sex with him is most definitely a chore.

Woman_on_Pause · 2021-06-09T15:05:53+00:00

She is bowing down to him, even in this post. "I think he took that as an insult but I swear that wasn't how I meant it"

*sigh*

LilithWon · 2021-06-09T15:15:08+00:00

This man is an abuser.

Lavender_flow · 2021-06-09T12:02:49+00:00

He compares her to a prostitute and laugh about with his friends. Divorce him now. Like jesus

Mella_20 · 2021-06-09T15:27:27+00:00

He's being an abusive fuck for the sake of it. He knows what she meant by the sex thing, but he's committed to misunderstanding her. He wants any reason to punish her, and the "sex as a job" thing was the perfect opportunity. What an abusive fuck.

Myplummms · 2021-06-09T15:28:23+00:00

Men always treat women that are SAHM nice in the beginning because they're getting what they want but then begin to take them for granted. The "office wife"/sleeping with the secretary is a cliche for a reason.

driverslicensebyOR · 2021-06-09T15:34:53+00:00

it is because he hates you, sis. i want to hug her and send her our way

Equal-Ear2312 · 2021-06-09T17:53:14+00:00

Scrotes vehiculate this lie that SAHMs sit on their ass all day.

I've heard it before. I've seen it in other Reddit posts before.

Sahm is a full time job with no pension and no resting time if the other person is a scrote. You can get cancer and not have money to have a regular screening.

GabbaG0ul · 2021-06-09T14:25:52+00:00

All of this over some burnt chicken tendies.

TriniGold · 2021-06-09T17:02:19+00:00

Oh my gosh! I gasped. He brought over his friends to treat her like a prostitute. He had to get his gang to enforce his abuse because that’s what’s narcissists do.

He felt belittled and held accountable for his poor lovemaking and had to put her back in her place. Jeez, the pain of this.

Princesspeach8188 · 2021-06-09T17:15:42+00:00

Divorce. Now.

She is 22 years old with 3 children under the age of two and according to him, she sits on her ass all day? Horrific.

I want to have children and stay at home to raise them when they're young for at least a few years, but stories like this really scare me. It's why it's so important to continuously vet, have your own savings, never EVER be scared of divorce, and have a strong escape route should anything go as terrible as this.

Muffcakelord · 2021-06-09T13:57:54+00:00

I wish it was possible to simply step into each other's shoes for a month. He has to go down on her 4/5 of the times they get frisky without getting his dick touched (to make him understand what not expecting reciprocating means), alongside with them both switching all tasks. I bet you my LIFE in at least 99/100 cases, men would be regretting ever insulting their SAHMs after this trial.

Edit: yeah also giving birth cannot really be simulated so while she's working on that, at least for 6 months he should be doing both all home tasks and work outside of home tasks at the same time. Maybe, MAYBE he gets to experience a fraction of the fatigue and mental issues of pregnancy that way

capresesalad1985 · 2021-06-09T15:34:50+00:00

I know the husband is absolute garbage fire here but the friends too!!! What the hell!? Not surprised he is surrounded by NVM. Laughing at prostituting your friends wife?? That’s disgusting.

Waste-Win · 2021-06-09T13:22:19+00:00

I feel so terribly sorry for this poor woman, sadly she is too much into being a pickme to wake up and realise her husband sucks, she is way too young to be the mother of 3, but well I would bet everything I have on my bank account that her husband is at least 8 years older.

TheQueenQuasar · 2021-06-09T15:21:03+00:00

I'm 70% sure I'll get shamed or chastised for this because I'm probably not going to come off as super supportive. This isn't to say that I don't feel bad for her because I do. I feel awful because the guy is trash and she is so young to be dealing with that. And I absolutely think he is at least 8 years her senior and he is absolutely abusing her. The only rates he needs to be concerned about are the averages of all the jobs she does. She would make more than him. Salary.com reports that the "median annual salary of a mother is $178,201 – more than a $20,000 increase from the 2017 salary". He needs to shut up and be grateful instead of being entitled. And instead of seeing how sex is a chore for her as a reflection on him probably being a selfish 'lover', he decides to embarrass her instead?? All my SAHM friends can't wait to hop on top of their husbands because these men don't treat them like garbage.

I'm not a SAHM or even a mom at all but it still makes my blood boil when men claim SAHMs don't do anything when they should know it's a 24/7 job.

I hate how she says something along the lines of 'well the kids have a dad so there's that and that's important'. Yeah they have a crummy dad present teaching his boys how to treat women and if they ever have girls, what they should be treated like. He might be present but he's still trash. This is almost equivalent to 'at least he doesn't hit me so he's not physically abusive' as if that's the only type of abuse that exists.

This is why I had to stop reading that subreddit because I think most of the women don't go there for actual advice, especially if people tell her she needs to analyze his actions and leave him in the dust. They want to be told to stick it out, it's ok, give him time, yeah you are crazy, stop being so emotional, blah blah blah. They also want us to make excuses for him like she does and when people don't, the woman defends him, which in turn still makes me believe even more she wants people to tell her to not give up hope, etc. It's exhausting.

I think she should find some resources and leave him like the dust he is. The process might be slow but she can do it and hopefully safely as well.

Imaginary-Driver-767 · 2021-06-09T17:07:29+00:00

She’s 22 and a mom of three. If this sorry excuse of a man is in his late twenties to thirties or beyond I’m gonna puke.

dembar126 · 2021-06-09T17:51:09+00:00

Men: "Part of my wife's JOB is to have sex with me."

Wife: "I see having sex with you as a job or chore."

Men: ....😠

waitingforsunlight · 2021-06-09T18:19:15+00:00

22 with three kids...mother of God. She has several children to take care of most likely before she ever learned how to be an adult herself. Also, notice how she mentioned her age and her kid's ages but not her husband's age. I would bet a serious amount of money he's AT LEAST 27 and they were either in a whirlwind relationship and got pregnant accidentally/he sabotaged her BC OR they've been together since she was a minor and he groomed her.

GabbaG0ul · 2021-06-09T14:25:21+00:00

Yep, men will squeeze all the resources possible out of you. Then publicly humiliate you the moment you push back. Not even pushing back really.

Jaelismyhomegirl · 2021-06-10T02:55:23+00:00

I think my pregnancy… young children, and a new baby… has been a lot for him

for him

🤯🤬

Elegant-Emergency-60 · 2021-06-09T18:36:28+00:00

Jesus fucking Christ. Girl leave his ass. And shame on his friends for not getting up and leaving when he pulled that stunt. I don’t care who you are if you use my presence to abuse your partner I’m out and I’m never talking to you again.

veniphyl · 2021-06-09T10:00:13+00:00

It's a stupid life choice in most case if you choose to be a housewife. Even more stupid to marry and have kids at such young age.

asteria2002 · 2021-06-09T14:29:38+00:00

Op what is the link? Can you invite her here, so she can get the support she deserves?

QueenCrownn · 2021-06-10T00:32:35+00:00

I went to find her post, but it was locked for commenting. The part that really got me was, “I’m ok with insults“. What kind of environment did she grow up in and now live in to be ok with insults??! That’s scary that she said that. She’s clearly being abused and is ok with it. That’s very sad. Someone told her to leave and she responded with…she doesn’t want to leave. She’s blaming herself and her kids and covid about her husband being a shitty person, when it just seems like his personality.

When her brain becomes fully developed she’ll realize that she should’ve left. By then her kids will be a little older and then she’ll blame staying on the kids. Then by 40 she’ll get divorced because only then she’ll realize what she put up with. Also by then he would’ve probably had multiple affairs that she forgave him for.

Fun_Tangerine4494 · 2021-06-10T04:43:16+00:00

It’s so rough seeing someone be where I used to be. I don’t have kids (thank the fertility gods), but man the shit I used to put up with.

I want to take their face in my hands and let her know she would be happier alone. Parallel parenting is a thing. She doesn’t have to put up with this garbage.

Condom-Ad-Don-Draper · 2021-06-09T22:40:21+00:00

She should have negotiated her rates, then realized even her husband couldn’t afford them and left. 😅

AbbyDean1985 · 2021-06-10T10:57:59+00:00

Sounds like she's married to an abuser. I bet this is an age gap relationship too.

2021-06-09T14:44:40+00:00

[removed]

i2aminspired · 2021-06-12T05:24:52+00:00

Reason #9,999 not to get married if you're a woman.

Title	When the mask comes off
Author	Confused_One_
Upvotes	666
Comments	119
Date	June 9, 2021 9:20 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/nvrig2/when_the_mask_comes_off/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/when-the-mask-comes-off.783585 https://theredarchive.com/post/783585

Comments

I've heard it before. I've seen it in other Reddit posts before.

for him

for him

for him

for him