Q4M What’s a high n count? How does that affect a woman’s ability to lock you down?

GottaPSoBad · 2022-07-11T22:46:46+00:00

I'll just preface by offering my personal philosophy:

Don't ask questions you don't really want the answer to, and, barring that, focus more on context than raw data. Basically, most guys are better off not asking. The ones who insist on knowing should ask for explanations, not just numbers. This applies similarly to women when asking comparable questions to men.

1) what n count is too high for an LTR?

Varies by age, and I really try not to judge or even ask (following my own advice). Being into double digits during your twenties, particularly early twenties, is probably a bit sus though. Similarly, being at 20+ during your early thirties is kinda pushing it.

2) what n count is too high for casual?

Like someone else said, being truly casual means this shouldn't matter. I also don't believe in the FWB-to-LTR pipeline as a rule. I think that's just a fantasy which women (and a few men) fall into naively.

3) Do you ask a girl her n count?

Basically "no." I'm probably capable of handling the answer, just not particularly interested. I care more about her overall behavior and track record, not just raw numbers.

(How early in the dating process?)

If I did ask, I'd think it wouldn't be super early. Weeks or months into knowing them maybe. I know that'll probably sound counterintuitive to some lads here, but the opposite sounds weird AF to me. Like, I'm asking a chick I'm still getting to know, possibly on a first date, "how many people have you slept with"? Hell no. That's autistic AF. I'd get a drink thrown in my face and I'd deserve it.

4) Does fucking on the first date make you not want to LTR someone?

Me personally? No, it's not exclusionary. I'd take it as a compliment. I do recognize it's a signal of sorts tho. I'd probably ask about it later, and I'd want to know this isn't something she does all the time. If it was, then that would be a hard pass.

Assume you know nothing about this woman’s previous sexual exploits except bare numbers.

I get why you added this qualifier, but I would just say that's not real life nor terribly helpful. Context matters a fuck ton.

Bikerbats · 2022-07-11T19:59:15+00:00

I don't know my N count, but it's well into triple digits, so here goes:

1, never cared. Never asked.

2, never cared. Never asked.

3 answered

4 Nope. That's actually my story. My wife and I had these great intentions of maintaining a casual relationship, failed at remaining casual, been married for a lifetime now.

cloudydays84 · 2022-07-11T18:53:19+00:00

Idk, probably around 15 or more, considering age, will probably have me raise an eyebrow
Probably around the same range
No, it's not something I'm actively thinking about when dating a person
I don't really care. If we fuck on the first date it's not going to make me less invested in a long term relationship but it's not going to make me more invested either

wtknight · 2022-07-11T19:02:46+00:00

I don’t have casual sex. I don’t have relationships with women who have casual sex. I’d judge her N based upon whether she acquired it through relationships or through casual sex.

Do you ask a girl her n count?

No. I try to ascertain her attitude towards casual sex and if she has any casual sex history, though.

Does fucking on the first date make you not want to LTR someone?

I’d never have sex on the first date. Even making out with her would bother me, unless perhaps it was with someone whom I already knew very well.

Vtridolla · 2022-07-11T18:58:07+00:00

I don’t have a number that’s too high, as I’m very promiscuous myself. You don’t trip off the women that came before you and I won’t trip off the men that came before me.

See above.

Fuck no that’s not my business, we go get tested and we handle our business.

No but i do really appreciate women that make me wait, anticipation is fucking amazing.

FatmanSlim93 · 2022-07-11T23:45:14+00:00

I’d say like over 10-15. Once it gets past that I don’t think I’d care where the relationship is going so it wouldn’t matter.

Electrical_Coat_8714 · 2022-07-11T19:20:29+00:00

1.) N/a, I don't care as long as you are loyal to me in OUR relationship.

2.)N/a, I completely don't care

3.) No, I'm only slightly autistic, and if it's really something that beats how I feel on 1 and 2 she will eventually tell on herself

4.) No, her actual actions and mannerisms are what makes me want the ltr, I've both gotten sex before an official date (we were friends for years and I asked her straight up if she was trying to fuck). And after several "unofficial" dates (taking her out before we actually agreed to be together). Both felt like natural pacing and I didn't feel left to wait OR like one was putting out too fast. If it feels right go for it, if it doesn't, don't.

midwesternMD · 2022-07-11T21:35:06+00:00

Mid 30s man here. For the record, I think n count is a bullshit metric.

1) too high for LTR?

I might get antsy if she’s been with 30+ men. I suppose if she’s north of 100, I might not consider her for LTR material. But realistically, the reasons why she’s north of 100 are more than likely the issue.

2) cutoff for casual?

None. My threshold for casual is: not fat/attractive enough, not crazy, nonsmoker. My LTR dealbreakers like cheaters, single mothers, etc are all non-issues for casual.

3) do I ask her for n counts?

Fuck no. I basically don’t care what her n count is, I don’t expect any woman to answer honestly at any time, and I don’t want her to ask about mine. Plus, I can’t imagine any circumstance in which asking about n count directly is socially acceptable/appropriate.

4) does fucking on the first date change my opinion about LTR Vs casual?

No. Fucking on the first date tells me that she’s really into me, and gives me some insight into our sexual compatibility. (I expect that the first couple of times are slightly awkward getting-to-know-you sex) Every tidbit of information I glean from our conversations is what dictates LTR vs casual. Whether we have sex on the first date or the tenth date doesn’t factor into LTR vs casual. Well, except in the case that if we haven’t physically progressed/hooked up by the 5th/6th date, I begin to lose interest/begin to get concerned that we’re sexually incompatible. I don’t think I’ve gone on a 10th date without hooking up more than 1-2 times in my life.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2022-07-11T18:51:27+00:00

1) not an issue unless you make it one

2) not an issue unless you make it one

3) never because it wasn’t an issue

4) never thought about it. Usually it was. “That was good let’s find time to do it again.” If I liked her

Also the average lifetime for men and women is. 4-8 So most people are in a general range despite all the PPD talk.

343_peaches_and_tea · 2022-07-12T01:39:03+00:00

[permanently deleted]

801735 · 2022-07-11T18:57:23+00:00

3) No. Don't ask questions an honest answer to which you're not really ready to hear.

4) No.

Assume you know nothing about this woman’s previous sexual exploits except bare numbers.

Bare numbers? What kind of wishful thinking is THAT? Have you any idea at all how easily and often women lie about numbers?

AcanthisittaExotic81 · 2022-07-12T00:28:08+00:00

anything past 3, or any "casual" ONS encounters would make me not take them seriously (looking for something serious, but its lame to shame people about bodycount--if you arent compatible/feel weird about it just dont date them), ideally looking for a virgin currently tho
not unless i'm interested in the answer
no

daddysgotanew · 2022-07-12T01:58:20+00:00

1). 10

2). 0-Infinity. Doesn’t matter, it’s not going to last anyway

3). No. I’ve gotten good at making estimations

4). No, that will all depend on whether I actually like her or not once I know her. I’d actually prefer to always have sex on the first date. I know she’s actually attracted to me, and it gets all the awkwardness out of the way so we can start actually getting to know each other without the pressure. You won’t get past 3 dates with no sex with me anyway at this stage in my life before I disappear.

Puzzled_Carob_2742 · 2022-07-12T04:44:53+00:00

Probably about 20. There’s no real cut off, I’ve dated women with higher numbers that behaved better than some with lower than that, but it’s around there that more often than not they’re damaged goods and don’t know how to be secure, loyal, kind, whatever.
Probably somewhere between 50 and 100. Again, no hard cut off, only encountered two or three women that had been around that much and it only took about a week of seeing them for me to become completely disgusted with them.
No. You can usually get a good idea and make a solid estimate without asking, and it’s why I say there’s no hard number.
No. If I like them I make my intentions obvious and then sleeping with me on the first date won’t change that. If I don’t like them so much and I’m not communicating an obvious desire to date them and they still want to sleep with me, then it’s a red flag, but again it doesn’t change anything because I wasn’t considering them a match in the first place.

Eyesofmalice · 2022-07-12T13:18:39+00:00

This is all of course a personal opinion so it shouldn't count for anything other than as a sample to determine a pattern. Having said that:

100
300
No, never
Not at all.

SantarpiosPizza · 2022-07-12T18:00:00+00:00

Anything over 12.

Solid-Operation-8266 · 2022-07-13T15:17:43+00:00

Body count doesn’t matter. I’m not looking. For commitments but I have fucked plenty of women in relationships. I was the second dick to some of them. Then 100th for others. When someone comes around she wants to fuck, she will.

SilentFroggy · 2022-07-11T20:41:41+00:00

2-3 max. No casual sex/hookups.
I don’t know why it would matter.
Maybe.
No clue.

Meihuajiancai · 2022-07-11T20:37:51+00:00

1-2. Unlike many others on this sub, N count is not something I worry about, unless it's crazy high. What matters to me is who she racked up her numbers with. If the guys she racked up those numbers with consistently have a trait that I don't have, I consider that to be a flag of whatever shade of yellow that is closest to red. Not a deal killer, but almost a deal killer.

Never have I asked but it's not hard to tell if you don't come off as caring about it. Just listen intently and fill in the blanks.
No, it means we had a great time and she likes me.

Hard_Corsair · 2022-07-11T21:43:45+00:00

When she’s lost count.
When she’s lost count.
Yes, usually early on. I ask a lot of questions and get a lot of intel.
I fucked my ex on our first date, and I fucked my current girlfriend within 24 hours of our first date.

SmakeTalk · 2022-07-11T21:56:48+00:00

Number doesn't really matter to me at all, context is important though. If she's never held down a relationship and she's either a virgin or has slept with enough guys to show she's literally never tried committing to someone for more than a month... I'm out.

I don't date casually anymore but I don't have a number for that, at least not one that's realistic or that I've ever heard directly.

itm4l2000 · 2022-07-11T23:49:16+00:00

Higher the better, if she can give great blowjobs only an idiot would leave her, amirite men 😉

Slight_Fig5187 · 2022-07-12T09:28:15+00:00

You forgot to add: how important is your own "body count" (horrible expression) as a man when judging a woman's sexual past?

Because if you think your own is not important, that's blatant hypocrisy.

And if yours is very low or non existent (which is perfectly fine), you might just be scared of being compared to others.

My advice to women: you don't need to give this information to anyone.

back_in_blyat · 2022-07-11T18:51:50+00:00

1) Not a hard number, but 1 serious boyfriend every 2 years since age of sexual activity is my hard line. Most girls I talk to end up being between 22-26, so that puts it between 3-5 as an acceptable range.

2) n/a, if its truly casual it doesn't matter by definition and gets thrown out the window along with a host of other standards that would apply for an LTR

3) I avoid outright asking, but its fairly easy to ascertain. "How many serious relationships have you had" + "have you ever had a one night stand" are innocuous enough if the topic of prior relationships is brought up to give you a fairly reliable estimate.

4) If I genuinely believed her answers to the above it would not matter if I also thought of her as relationship material prior to sex

CoachPRIPecho · 2022-07-11T21:57:43+00:00

Very very important. To me it determines the value of rhe woman. It depends of the years but if a 20 year chick had more then 10 bodies im outta there. How can you be a high value woman with lots of casual sex partners?

Spinning4plates · 2022-07-12T18:51:21+00:00

3
∞
Usually some time after we've started fucking, never before then
No

AutoModerator · 2022-07-11T18:44:44+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

PlayfulLawyer · 2022-07-11T22:22:21+00:00

1) what n count is too high for an LTR?

It's not a specific number but a certain amount within a certain range will make me raise an eyebrow, if I'm dating a chick who's 30 years old and been with 15 guys, not that big a deal, if I'm dating a chick who's 19 and been with 15 guys huge red flag

2) what n count is too high for casual?

As long as she has no diseases I'm cool

Do you ask a girl her n count?

If it comes up sure, outside of that there's other ways of finding out a ballpark estimate, because honestly I don't believe them to tell me the truth anyways lol, most women know that they have a vested interest in lying about their body count, unless they are a pornstar who everybody knows, expect the numbers to be fudged up a bit

Does fucking on the first date make you not want to LTR someone?

Both of my most serious relationships we fucked within the first week of knowing each other so no it's not a deterrent

SmarmyPapsmears · 2022-07-11T23:10:38+00:00

1: I don't have an official number, but anything after 15 and she's probably losing points imo

2: None? Who cares about casual.

3: After sex but before I decide to commit. I'd say around 60% of the time, women would bring it up first.

4: Yes, fucking on the 1st date is minus points.

extrachromie-homie · 2022-07-12T02:41:56+00:00

20+
None. But my condom better be bullet proof
Not directly. If she’s a LTR we’ll talk about past relationships, but I wouldn’t straight up ask how many people she’s fucked.
No. I think more women would be put off by first date sex than men.

RahLyt · 2022-07-12T03:01:13+00:00

I honestly don't care. I just do when girls change their narrative because they are seeing me. Comes off as really fake. If you are fucking on the side while you're telling me you're not ready, I'll move on.

dbz19_kai · 2022-07-12T09:33:36+00:00

Depends on age, person, circumstances, and who you’re asking.

Basically for me, compatibility and shared views and values is a big factor for me. I also don’t want to feel like I’m getting the short end of the stick

wb19081908 · 2022-07-12T11:40:10+00:00

20 tops. Ideally five to ten

jackedsoon · 2022-07-12T18:57:05+00:00

none
none
no never asked
no

smallstarseeker · 2022-07-11T20:46:14+00:00

Even 1 football team is too much for my tastes.

I require a virgin, a woman which wasn't spoiled by a single football team in her life.

coastFI_chaser · 2022-07-11T21:42:14+00:00

[permanently deleted]

hotpinkpurple · 2022-07-12T01:49:27+00:00

For me, no n count is too high. I’m slut positive!! Lol!! I honestly really don’t understand why this matters to people.

What if you meet the person of your dreams who matches you in every way, including their outlooks on life in the current moment, but they happened to have a sexual past? You would really give up on that? That’s just crazy to me.

Miserablemermaid · 2022-07-11T19:11:42+00:00

3
50
I guesstimate from context clues; asking is pointless.
Depends. Does it come off like she's fucked on the first date before? If so, yeah, she's got no chance at an LTR with me.

AelfredRex · 2022-07-11T19:56:14+00:00

I'd date a porn star so none of that matters to me.

Play_Muted · 2022-07-11T22:50:16+00:00

0+ too high

kjk67895 · 2022-07-11T18:55:26+00:00

Minimum of 10 bodies I want experience
Minimum of 20 so I can actually orgasm
I ask for fun, but it has no bearing on anything really.
Not at all. Tbh with Tinder body counts are just going to get higher for certain people, especially pretty/desirable women. So it doesn’t matter.

Zcuzz · 2022-07-11T20:05:18+00:00

LTR - Age is a factor, but if you average more than one guy a year, you have pretty much already proven you aren't LTR material. One every other year starting at age 18 sounds reasonable.

Casual - I don't care. As long as she doesn't give me a disease it holds no relevance.

I never ask a chick her n count because she's probably just going to lie anyway. Sometimes they tell the truth and the number is horrifying (I was madly in love with a girl and she revealed that she an n count of hundreds and I never looked at her the same again).

I had a two year relationship with a woman i had sex with on the first date. We just had good chemistry.

y2kjanelle · 2022-07-11T21:42:50+00:00

For me, in my mind any history of casual sex i will treat her/our sex as nothing special. As her/our sex is worthless it also means i will not stop fucking other womam. She will have to prove her value in other ways. "what she bring to the table" .

How do u treat casual woman different. Like visiting a brothel u wouldn't want anyone to see u. I wouldn't want to walk around holding a woman hand past another dude that had fucked her casually. I would feel sick and disgusted with myself for being with a casual.. I just wouldn't have the pride walking with her. It a rule I have with my ltrs never hold my hand or show affection if we are around a past guy is around.

3) Do you ask a girl her n count? (How early in the dating process?) 4) Does fucking on the first date make you not want to LTR someone?

U never ask, if u do she wont put out. Its more of a read between the lines when talking. We are our past life experiences so it's impossible to hide.
Double edges sword, if u waited and other men in her past didn't that's a hit to my ego (pride) no way.. Personly I would rather she put out on the first date, then again I've only been on one lunch date in my life, that because i wanted to take my car for a spin. some men have a different opinion on this. I don't won't a born again virgin that's run-through.

Specialist-Action-33 · 2022-07-11T20:24:04+00:00

Women are going to lie about their n-count of they think its high. At this point, its hard to believe anything thst will come out of their mouths in regards to n-count.

1) what n count is too high for an LTR?

It depends on her age. If shes around my age (mid 30's) then ~20 is too high

2) what n count is too high for casual?

That idc because if its casual, then I don't plan on letting it manifest itself into a relationship

3) Do you ask a girl her n count?

I would but like I said earlier, mist high n-count women will lie just so a man won't run off. I usually find out a couple of years later whether or not her answer is the same as when I first asked her.

How early in the dating process?

At least after we slept together

4) Does fucking on the first date make you not want to LTR someone?

I don't think it does

loganmacoy · 2022-07-12T02:35:57+00:00

More than 10 partners it is likely that woman is going to divorce with in 5 years.

https://www.reddit.com/r/KevinSamuels/comments/osaby8/controversial_studies_linking_dating_past_with/

Miserablemermaid · 2022-07-11T19:59:19+00:00

>what n count is too high for an LTR?

More than 7-10

>what n count is too high for casual?

No N count matters

>Do you ask a girl her n count?

No.

> Does fucking on the first date make you not want to LTR someone?

Yep.

cunningcaring · 2022-07-11T21:02:25+00:00

Forget n count. It’s irrelevant. Don’t ask, don’t tell.

Focus on the important aspects of a person.

mustbepurged · 2022-07-12T03:45:26+00:00

4+ is too high for an LTR.

According to an in depth study, women’s likelihood of divorcing increases almost twofold if she has more than one premarital sex partner. That being said, I will tolerate 3 but no more.

https://ifstudies.org/blog/counterintuitive-trends-in-the-link-between-premarital-sex-and-marital-stability

There is no limit for casual if I am sure that she does not have loose flaps and a sexually transmitted disease.
You can get an idea of her n count by her lifestyle, how she interacts with her friends, and how she treats her parents. It is careful observation of what she does and not what she says.

4) I would be highly suspicious if she fucked on the first date, but wouldn’t write her off as LTR material right away. I would need to carefully observe from an objective perspective and not let the fact that she put out on the first date cloud my judgement.

There is no exact science to this, and on a personal level there are too many variables. For men, my advice is to set boundaries and stick to them when vetting for an LTR, and do not budge unless there is solid and sound reason to do so.

2022-07-11T18:46:01+00:00

Assume you know nothing about this woman’s previous sexual exploits except bare numbers.

Even that, it's just whatever you're told. It seems silly to care about something unverifiable. You either have to accept that reality or be single.

Sad_Top1743 · 2022-07-11T19:01:18+00:00

10
25? This one’s harder, if I feel like she’s too slutty I’m gonna be worried about diseases.
Never
Not really

backcourtjester · 2022-07-11T19:25:44+00:00

Why the hell would there be an n count too high for casually fucking?!

ChibsFilipTelfordd · 2022-07-11T20:24:16+00:00

1) what n count is too high for an LTR?

Maybe at my age (25)...50? 75? I'd probably still date if that was the only red flag. But it is a red flag. My preference is 5-20=N. My N is 24.

2) what n count is too high for casual?

And next couple of questions.

N/a. Though triple digits would make me wary of std.

3) Do you ask a girl her n count? (How early in the dating process?)

Nope. In fact I've been asked more than I ask someone straight up.

4) Does fucking on the first date make you not want to LTR someone?

NO!!! The exact opposite. If someone doesn't fuck me on the first date I assume either they're potentially using me for money and dates, or worse, we're sexually incompatible and they're a conservative with their sex life.

ThrowawayYAYAY2002 · 2022-07-11T20:50:15+00:00

1) Over 10/12.

2) There isn't one.

3) Not directly, but I squeeze it out eventually.

4) No.

HazyMemory7 · 2022-07-12T02:52:52+00:00

Around ~10 or less is reasonable. For casual n count doesn't matter. I have never outright asked "what is your body count" but you can generally tell based on their attitudes towards sex, intimacy, and relationships.

RearwindowPinecone · 2022-07-11T19:37:17+00:00

Its average mens revenge fantasy,they got reject from the women out of their league and they dreamed one day these women would chase them🤣

Longjumping_Mud7294 · 2022-07-12T07:23:11+00:00

Only weird insecure men worry about it.

GottaPSoBad · 2022-07-11T21:00:22+00:00

[permanently deleted]

lukehighwalker15 · 2022-07-12T05:13:20+00:00

Hmm the lower the body count the more I’d appreciate her. But like it’s not a deal breaker.

I never asked but I haven’t been with too many women.

I once asked this question would you marry someone with the same body count as you? So like if you say no. Then I just think ur doing something wrong.

Diddy_1978 · 2022-07-12T12:38:18+00:00

I believe my partner is aware my body count is not particularly low, although not crazy high and although he never asked. I have had several very long relationships and also some sex only, FWB, ONS. I am more experienced than him but he’s good in bed and I like him and chose to be with him. Not sure why he should have a problem with that. I bring an awful lot to the table, too.

CTZStef_Qc · 2022-07-12T00:14:13+00:00

I don’t understand shit with all those abbreviations… is there a glossary somewhere?

SkeletonMagi · 2022-07-12T02:50:02+00:00

My new metrics for sexual partners: * Unicorn - no digit * Virgin - single digit * Normal - double digits * Slut - triple digits * Pornstar - quadruple digits

I would never consider an LTR or marriage to a slut or higher. She’s just likely damaged and my dong won’t compete. I ask n count on a date usually by revealing my very, very low n count first.

ex-turpi-causa · 2022-07-12T10:42:06+00:00

There's no set n-count, as the number itself isn't the important part but rather what the number says or might say about the person's values, emotional history and relationship experience. For instance, someone with a lot of partners might have committment issues, trust issues, or similar. They may not see sex as a form of love. Or they may not have had any serious relationship experience, all of which are causes for concern but never really automatic deal breakers.

That said, there is still a line where it starts becoming disgusting to think about, for both men and women, but that depends on age and time frame. For me personally I think that line would be too much above 20 partners at around age 35 (which is already like double the lifetime average). Similarly too many partners over the course of a year or other short time frame would raise alarms, say more than 3 per year. For casual sex, which I tried but never was really a fan of, I'm not sure why the number would matter or how likely it would be for this sort of conversation to come up as it's a bit personal and intimate.

But again, it's not the number as such; but rather what might have happened and the person's intentions in racking up those numbers and having that much sex with strangers. For instance, it might speak to some sort of trauma, or lack of understanding of the opposite sex (i.e. not being able to identify "players"), emotional naivety, viewing sex and intimacy as wholly seperate, an overriding need for validation, being insecure and so on.

I don't typically make a point to ask but relationship / sexual history does usually come up in one way or another in my experience. If the person can't be transparent and talk openly about their past then that's a red flag for me. Sex on the first date would not automatically be a deal breaker for me but again would depend on the circumstances and the overall chemistry between us.

TodTheRod01 · 2022-07-12T12:46:55+00:00

I'd say the personality traits and what not that lead to a high N count would naturally make me exclude someone...if she can't remember all the guys she's slept with...odds are, to me thats not a good fit long term.

no threshold for N count for casual

as far as body count for LTR, i've never given it a number but lower the better...BUT if she's slept with 1 dude but is a total bitch...her lowe body count doesnt put her ahead of the girl who is just as attractive as her but has slept with 5 dudes.

NotARussianBot1984 · 2022-07-12T14:15:27+00:00

1) no limit i care about the person. My current gf is over 90, she's amazing in and out of bed. 2) see 1.
3) yes and early. After i demonstrate i dont judge girls are more honest.

4) if the sex is good i will want a relationship more. Bad sex is a deal breaker.

decoy88 · 2022-07-12T15:10:46+00:00

Q4M What's a high n count? How does that affect a woman's ability to lock you down?

High n count is >12-15 I’d say. N count alone wouldn’t affect it.

1) what n count is too high for an LTR?

None. It’s more about how it got there.

2) what n count is too high for casual?

None. It’s more about how it got there.

3) Do you ask a girl her n count? (How early in the dating process?)

Yes, usually after the first few fucks.

4) Does fucking on the first date make you not want to LTR someone?

Not at all. It’s how I roll. The longer the wait, the less likely the LTR.

0-13 · 2022-07-12T15:16:04+00:00

Count means absolutely nothing if they protect themselves. I’m young and I’ve had virgins and very not virgins and it changes absolutely nothing.

AnnoxisTenebraerum · 2022-07-12T16:25:28+00:00

So, N-count is a measurement, and I do not think it represents well the thing it strives to observe. Specifically, it needs to be completed by the average length of the relationships in question. Five relationships that lasted on average 2 years will look a lot better than if they lasted 2 months. Concretely though, giving you an exact number is pointless, you still need to enact proper judgement.
Fundamuntally, it is bullshit to have such requirements for a casual fling. The tacit aggreement of a casual is "I will use you purely for my sexual pleasure and you will do the same to me".
1. To complement aformentioned explanation, I think casual relationship are a net negative for everyone involved, generally speaking.
No. Frankly speaking, there is no need. Social medias are such an easy information source that stalking her for a few hours should be all you need to get an idea. Or even ask her friends. As said before, the exact number does not matter much.
It will be a red flag. Frankly speaking, if you want to fuck me in the first few minutes of having met, I will be slightly flattered, but then I will be reminded she does not care about what I am actually, which, considering I only want a long-term relationship, would be a dealbreaker.

Teflon08191 · 2022-07-12T16:46:59+00:00

Her attitude towards sex determines if she's LTR material or not. Her n count is only a clue.
The only off-putting thing about high n counts for casual is risk of STDs.
No. That's something that's meant to be sleuthed out, not asked explicitly. Like her age.
No, but it might function as a clue in regards to question 1.

CucumberAdditional39 · 2022-07-12T22:43:07+00:00

It depends on a lot of things. So, first, the number of men she's slept with doesn't bother me as much as the things it may indicate as a red flag. STDs are more common with more partners and women are more sensitive to catching them. Women that have had a lot of partners may have trouble keeping them, which could indicate serious issues. Women that have had a lot of partners may be prone to cheating casually when things go wrong or there is an argument here or there. A woman with a super high body count is like a man that won't stop talking about his ex and why it's all her fault. It isn't a problem that he has an ex, but rather the indication from the ex. I have had Women who have had a lot of partners before, but seemed reasonable, sane, faithful, and decent... I didn't have any problem with it. One turned out to be crazy anyway, cheated on me, and then got AIDS... Still, that is the main thing. To a much lesser extent, there is a bit of a psychological thing knowing someone else has been with your woman before, but most get past that relatively quickly.

Title	Q4M What’s a high n count? How does that affect a woman’s ability to lock you down?
Author	SignalThanks6766
Upvotes	19
Comments	359
Date	July 11, 2022 6:44 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/vwpq8a/q4m_whats_a_high_n_count_how_does_that_affect_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4m-whats-a-high-n-count-how-does-that-affect-a.1123139 https://theredarchive.com/post/1123139

Comments