Why do men let their gfs push them around?

EulenWatcher · 2023-12-05T04:49:04+00:00

a) What you can see might be happy relationships with partners wanting to please each other and doing things for each other. No harm in it, although it heavily depends on the context and you didn’t really provide any examples.

b) Sometimes partners use each other as an excuse not to do something. It’s not that they boss each other around but for some reason it’s more acceptable to say that you have plans with your SO rather than you just don’t want to hang out with your friends today or do this particular thing.

c) Some men just as some women don’t mind being boss around a bit and go with the flow without putting much efforts into deciding for themselves or planning things out.

d) Some have unhealthy relationships or poor boundaries and instead of voicing their opinion just agree on everything with their partner in attempt to avoid conflict whether it’s reasonable or not.

e) Some women just as some men are over controlling and want to have full control over their partner’s social life so they strategically make plans for spending time together in order not to let their partner to hang out hairy friends they disapprove.

h) Basically e but a worse variant with an abuser slowly isolating their victim.

i) Sometimes people also just outgrow their current social circle and they want to concentrate building their family. For their friends it looks like them having a controlling partner though.

wecovetwhatwesee · 2023-12-05T07:08:56+00:00

He doesn't want his pussy source to flee.

Traditional-Good1724 · 2023-12-05T06:20:13+00:00

Why do men let their gfs push them around?

desperation for anyone whether or not the person is good for them,

and fear of losing their gf if they don't behave like sycophants

19whale96 · 2023-12-05T08:01:11+00:00

I've had this done to me when I was younger and I felt the same way. Comes down to: they know you'll be there when they find time, their relationship isn't secure enough for them to depend on her in the same way. It's bro code you come to understand over time.

daddysgotanew · 2023-12-05T14:04:56+00:00

Most men are pussies, especially when they’re trying to get access to pussy.

Every time I hear “happy wife, happy life” I just think oh, you poor loser….

Ecstatic_Edge5825 · 2023-12-05T13:15:09+00:00

I dont know what kind of men those are, but I set my boundaries straight and it works. I give words of appreciation and kind gestures to my gf all the time, but I’m not afraid to say “you shouldn’t do that if you respect me” when I feel like it. I’m always collected and respectful but direct. She says it’s hot when I do that, and we have been successful even though there’s several differences between us.

I honestly don’t know why these women don’t lose attraction to these pushovers, it’s probably just the possessive type- I know of couples like this but could never be a part of one. I have a submissive side but only in an appropriate context, respectful partnership and mutual effort is an non-negotiable basis for me.

Safinated · 2023-12-05T04:59:04+00:00

Pussy

KorinTowerFreeloader · 2023-12-05T14:34:31+00:00

BB relationships at work.

MasterTeacher123 · 2023-12-05T13:14:36+00:00

Because those guys are scared they will never see another vagina again

-since · 2023-12-05T15:22:05+00:00

Only top comment should be:

They don't want to raise a bigger shit storm. Being submissive and compliant is less trouble than pissing her off or causing a greater conflict.

This is the primary and most common reason men placate their women. Not pussy. Not simping.

It's keeping a semblance of peace due to power imbalance.

moosemc · 2023-12-05T15:40:02+00:00

Tops and bottoms.

They have a way of finding each other.

philseven12 · 2023-12-06T02:30:22+00:00

The dude just wants to not be alone, the woman feels like she is settling but not able to replace him with a "better" guy who will fully commit to her. So she tries to bully him to make herself feel like a bad bitch

Gravel_Roads · 2023-12-05T11:13:19+00:00

Some men like to be submissive.

exponentialtaxi · 2023-12-05T05:15:06+00:00

She's really good to me and it makes me want to put in my share of the work to make her happy
In relationships you make compromises for each other, I might go with something even if I rather not, and she does the same in other cases
If the demand is too unreasonable and she has never done something similar for me I can/will just deny it

wheartv · 2023-12-05T19:47:48+00:00

They have a t shirt that says

“I have the pussy so I make the rules”

Women actually believe this and are surprised when a guy drops them on their ass

literaryhogwartian · 2023-12-05T12:49:26+00:00

I'm the organiser in my relationship. I inform my husband what's happening and where we are going because I am the organiser. I am great at organising. My husband is not. This is not me pushing him around, it's simply my role in our lives.

This does not mean I'm in charge. It just means I sort the itinerary.

Oneoft · 2023-12-05T07:42:03+00:00

Cause I love her bro next question

AngeCruelle · 2023-12-05T06:32:52+00:00

Freedom is a heavy burden. There are men who function best when they're told what to do and when. My love is one such person. He doesn't hesitate to fulfill my every wish, to the point where I've at times wondered if he has any will of his own. Luckily, I don't need him to.

Jaded_Interaction162 · 2023-12-05T07:24:57+00:00

Yeah I've seen this happen a lot. Even with guys who could easily replace the gf, they let her wear the pants. Maybe it's love?

OmoshiroiKudamono · 2023-12-05T05:34:38+00:00

When you say "attraction," there is physical attraction and there is resource attraction.

She is ONLY with them for what they PROVIDE. It is NOT LIMITED to only money. It can be energy, attention, and/or time as well.

She does NOT "respect" them if she acts like that to them.

NickTesla2018 · 2023-12-05T11:58:29+00:00

'Tang. And not the orange kind.

volleyballbeach · 2023-12-05T19:17:46+00:00

A lot of the same reasons women let their boyfriends push them around

throwaway316stunner · 2023-12-06T15:25:50+00:00

Because it’s either that or have NO ONE.

jamacianmecrazy67890 · 2023-12-05T09:19:33+00:00

Men generally don't have power. Their only options are take it or break up and be single for a long while.

AceOfSpadesGymBro3 · 2023-12-05T11:28:28+00:00

Because many men grow up with the idea that pissing a woman off is a fate worse than death. Or close to it. I'm being serious. It's the way many women exert control. It took me quite a few years to realize that I did in fact have the right to stand up for myself and do what I want when in a relationship even if the gf gets pissed off or upset.

Or to put in another way, the reason is fear of losing her. But once you get over that fear, women stop having any power over you.

RevolutionaryOkra679 · 2023-12-05T13:08:12+00:00

Cuz pussy is the ultimate bargaining chip

WilliamWyattD · 2023-12-05T15:58:58+00:00

How often is the girl in the wrong, though? Or how often is she nagging him to do shit he should just naturally be doing if he was a responsible adult with his shit together?

badeulicious · 2023-12-05T07:00:10+00:00

Some people like being led. Some like leading.

TomKikkert · 2023-12-05T10:34:21+00:00

Throw ten men together who don't know each other together at a barbie and at the end they are best mates.

Throw ten women together who don't know each other together at a barbie and at the end you don't get the same result.

ArguesAgainstYou · 2023-12-05T10:58:29+00:00

What’s weird is the girls never loose attraction like the red pill would have you believe.

Do you know this for a fact? Like do they still have a good sex life?

TheGreatBeefSupreme · 2023-12-05T11:41:35+00:00

It’s pretty normal behavior. Because there are more men than women in the dating pool, women have an easier time finding and entering into relationships. Men need to bend over backwards if they don’t want to be single.

Not every relationship is like this, but enough are.

macone235 · 2023-12-05T04:43:26+00:00

The only relationships I see with women pushing their man around are women who have settled, and resent their man for making them lead.

NefariousnessMost660 · 2023-12-05T16:25:11+00:00

Femdom fetish

coping_man · 2023-12-05T19:30:46+00:00

because she's in demand and she can feel it

bigbenistan · 2023-12-05T19:58:38+00:00

Because sex

CryptoCrackR · 2023-12-05T20:15:10+00:00

This shit blows my mind every day. I have a unique insight on it, I think. I’ve never had a serious/long term girlfriend cuz I was a loser in high school, then went hard red pill in college to compensate and ended up only having fwb/hookups since. End goal used to be gf but with all I’ve seen now I’d rather stick to what I’m doing cuz I value my freedom and sanity too much. When I got “hard red pilled” as a shy STEM major freshman my conclusion was to join the most fratty frat I could get a bid from, cuz well, girls love frat boys. I ended up getting a bid from the frat that’s essentially Animal House reincarnated in the 21st century at my university, and I survived pledging. By my own admission I tolerated some… questionable treatment… but I was convinced it was necessary. And dammit I was right, it worked, kinda hard to have bad luck with girls when there’s 50 drinking Michelobs in your foyer twice a week. BUT since getting initiated I’ve discovered that EVEN THESE GUYS get bitched by their girlfriends to an insane degree. We’re talking about some damn near caricature level frat boys too, the type where if a fellow brother slights them they’ll break their bedroom door down to fight them, the type that drink 5 days a week, don’t give a fuck about anything guys. Not the type I’d ever expected to see get pussywhipped. And yet for half of them, if their girlfriend tells them they’re not going out tonight, they tuck their balls between their legs and quietly fall in line. Hell I’ve seen a couple forgive blatant cheating if the girls pretty enough. TL;DR: Pussy will make a man do strange things, and no pussy will make a man do strange things. Gunna wasn’t playing, that shit is powerful.

RevolutionaryJob7908 · 2023-12-05T20:35:53+00:00

Threat of woman going tinder, leaving him next day.

Element_Girl · 2023-12-05T21:41:49+00:00

Your evidence is anecdotal and not a reflection of reality. Maybe your personality attracts friends who can't speak up for themselves. You're the common denominator here

razten-mizuten · 2023-12-05T21:43:54+00:00

Sorry is your complaint that your male friends hang out with their girlfriends when they’re asked to?

BigCriticism412 · 2023-12-06T00:36:55+00:00

Lol, I've had plenty of relationships and as soon as I noticed she was telling me what to do/who to hang out with, I immediately ended it. Zero fucking regrets.

boom-wham-slam · 2023-12-05T07:02:41+00:00

Its true because most men are weak and let their gf walk all over them like a door mat.

mike-sonko · 2023-12-05T05:02:54+00:00

Because they are natural-born simps. Look at Will Smith. One of the highest rated actors whose wife is a D-List actor at best. Yet guy was abused, cucked and humiliated in public by her and still seeks her approval. If simping and lack of backbone is in your DNA there's not much you can do about it.

RidingRedHare · 2023-12-05T10:20:27+00:00

This is normal. Many women behave like that. They will bitch at their boyfriend or husband if the guy doesn't do what she wants him to do.

CraftyCooler · 2023-12-05T09:12:25+00:00

I think that for most guys things like going out, where to go on vacation, what to do on weekend are bit like 'whatever'. I have my hobbies - I usually go alone to philharmonic or to jazz concerts - and that is something i care about, I also hang out with people from my university and from current and previous jobs. Socializing with my wife's friends is whatever to me. I do not like nor dislike my wife's friends - so if she wants to meet with them - i can go.

wtknight · 2023-12-05T13:40:15+00:00

The men who are like this are probably this way because of their need for regular sex and their perception of how difficult regular sex is to obtain.

grown_folks_talkin · 2023-12-05T16:13:18+00:00

Most men aren’t cut out for small constant confrontations. Women have more argumentative stamina. So the guys just go along with it until they ultimately rebel, often leaving.

MaleficentSun3923 · 2023-12-05T07:25:29+00:00

Pragmatic solution to prevent headache. Women just tend to be spoilt brats more often. Someone has to keep the peace around or else it would just be a chaotic toxic relationship. One person being mature is all it takes usually.

Sometimes it's worth the headache, but most of the time it isn't because it's about petty stuff.

You're going to have a lot of headaches and many failed relationships if you can't give in time to time. Same goes for women. One time the guy gives in, other time the gal gives in. Keeps the peace.

Living with other people isn't always harmonious.

TomKikkert · 2023-12-05T09:32:50+00:00

Female control like this is tolerated by society.

yarro27 · 2023-12-05T06:21:07+00:00

Because your friends are like domesticated dogs and waiting for next command from the owners.

Peacesquad · 2023-12-05T13:44:45+00:00

Lack of confidence. Scarcity mindset. Feminism. Men scared to be men. So many other things.

SavingWagyuPork · 2023-12-05T14:27:35+00:00

Cuz those men are spineless lol. We need a couple of them in this world.

Tywinlol · 2023-12-05T10:32:02+00:00

Because abuse is excused, tolerated and even encouraged when abuser is female and victim is a man. I guarantee you thay if it were other way around the same bluepilled people who say men love it, its just compromise and so on will scream coercive control, emotional abuse and so on. They don't see man as human beings just as utilities to be used and abused.

KingLancelot1991 · 2023-12-05T05:09:49+00:00

Fantastic question.

0DarkFlirty · 2023-12-05T15:00:47+00:00

One has pussy One is pussy

harmonica2 · 2023-12-05T04:47:08+00:00

This would seem contradictory what guys often talk about here, that most women are only wanting to date men who the take charge type.

ArtifactFan65 · 2023-12-05T05:07:39+00:00

Either they don't have enough alpha qualities or they don't even realise there's a power play happening in the first place

UglyDude1987 · 2023-12-05T14:01:41+00:00

Most relationships are like that with women holding the power in the relationship.

mods_have_small_ween · 2023-12-05T15:43:40+00:00

How do you know they dont lose attraction? are you aware of their sex life and how often they have it.

Sometimes women start to become controlling. They put a whole bunch of roadblocks and gatekeep access to sex. The man must do x,y,z and is rewarded with sex. If he fails, or doesn't listen, he gets no sex.

Mobrowncheeks · 2023-12-05T05:38:16+00:00

Because the consequences of not doing what she wants, especially in a relationship the guy wants to be in. Are worse then the consequences of say, not hanging out with the boys this time

fakingandnotmakingit · 2023-12-05T20:54:19+00:00

While I acknowledge that there are some controlling women out there, I do think there are other explanations

I know a couple where the guy hates organising. They definitely follow a more he earns the money, she does all the cleaning labour dynamic

He's actually a very sociable guy. He just also hates organising. He's also terrible at marking things down on his calendar.

So his wife literally tells him things like "tomorrow you said you were having drinks with x and on Saturday we're both seeing x and y, and on Sunday we're free but you said you wanted to see if z was free for surfing. I'll ask him if he is"

I find the dynamic weird. But it's their lives and it works for them.

Some people believe they and their partners are a package deal (e.g. Where I go you go and vice versa) some people don't. When these people get together that's a source of incompatibility.

Personally I don't believe in package deal couples. But I know people who do. I wouldn't be able to be with a guy who does. But some people stick out this incompatibility for some reason

ApprehensiveAsk3377 · 2023-12-06T04:28:41+00:00

They need choices to not have to do this

throwawayqqzz · 2023-12-05T11:10:26+00:00

Woman happy = sex or bj

Woman unhappy/mad = no sex or bj

As simple as that.

anon1029436292 · 2023-12-05T05:51:33+00:00

Because men would rather pretend they are being pushed around then admit they love their girlfriends and want to spend time with them over their mates, or that they cba to do a boys activity so use their girlfriend as a convenient excuse.

ConanTheCybrarian · 2023-12-05T11:13:06+00:00

"let"

ick

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TWCDev · 2023-12-05T22:16:38+00:00

I think because society in general allows or even encourages guys to push making mature decisions onto women supposedly to allow them to have more fun but often leaving the guys clueless in navigating adult life. Even when the guy is mature, tv and movies still show women bossing their guy around and their guy just wanting to play games or watch sports. It isn’t like women have any more reason than men to want trash taken out, to prioritize spending quality time with family, with having a nicely decorated home, whatever, it’s just that society has robbed most guys of the opportunity to mature their thinking. In my relationship, i have a rule that i don’t ever want to hear any requests unless it’s a favor for them. No “can you take the trash out” requests, no “can you fold your laundry”, not anything, ever. Instead, we communicate by stating personal needs that benefit ourselves or state problems that we as a group have with timelines if something is timely. “The trash has raw food in it so might start to smell soon but i’m busy finishing a chore”, “can you put a load of my laundry in the washer”, etc. either a problem that needs to be solved or a favor. It works because when we each take care of things when we have time and know about it, no orders necessary. There is no job that belongs to any of us, though i cook more because i prefer gourmet meals and they prefer “simple dinners” It took a long time to get one of my partners (i live with 2) to stop giving us commands. She grew up that way, but it doesn’t make for a happy partnership, we don’t want a parent, we want an equal partner.

No-Click9406 · 2023-12-06T03:48:06+00:00

because peace is better than excitement most the time.

H_T1998 · 2023-12-06T23:01:03+00:00

Low testosterone

SnooMarzipans6929 · 2023-12-06T23:28:17+00:00

They probably lost hope in finding a nice woman. And I don't mean nice like "nice girl". I mean one that better aligns with what they are looking for.

It's sad. But not all women and men have this kind of relationship either. I think this is a gross generalization. I respect my boyfriend and love him dearly. He does in return as well. I would never think for one second to push him around or treat him like a lesser person and he would never do that to me. I wouldn't put up with it first of all, but he's also not that kind of person at all.

Don't settle for this crap no matter who you are. Be better and expect better.

mechanical_fish_81 · 2023-12-08T00:01:18+00:00

Its an excuse.

Your mate is married now or in a relationship. Why would he want to go to the bar with you just to watch you chat to women and talk about your dating life. He abandoned that lifestyle, so it makes sense he does not want to be part of it.

People in relationships and people who are single, have different lifestyles.

Or maybe they have kids and just can't be arsed doing the stuff you do as they have other pressing stuff to do.

Or maybe they would rather spend money elsewhere.

Not saying what you are saying happens doesn't happen, yeah there are controlling women just as there are controlling men, but some guys have low self esteem and do not think they can do better. But at end of the day, its their life their choice.

Different lifestyles do mean different responsibilities.

All that said, it is annoying if the relationship ends and they come running back as though they havn't fobbed you off and expect things to get back to how they were. Life moves on bro, sorry bro, you ain't my bro anymore, I have a new bro.

Like I will always make time for friends, if I am seeing someone. But there are certain things I am not so fussed about, as tbh I would rather be getting some sort of quality time (whatever you class as quality time) with partner rather than doing single dude stuff.

No-You7911 · 2023-12-08T04:23:30+00:00

It is called going to jail for assault with no evidence because we are supposed to believe all women.

Title	Why do men let their gfs push them around?
Author	BrightProduct5135
Upvotes	55
Comments	188
Date	December 5, 2023 4:36 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/18b3vun/why_do_men_let_their_gfs_push_them_around/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-do-men-let-their-gfs-push-them-around.1240053 https://theredarchive.com/post/1240053

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