Q4M: to What is on your list of requirements for a wife?

Zabadoodude · 2025-06-26T16:13:15+00:00

I Wouldnt autisticly send her a list of requirements before we even get to know each other, but as we date she will definitely learn what's important to me. Just off the top of my head, in no particular order:

Kind

Affectionate

Attractive

Loves me

Loyal

Similar core values, even if politics differs

Open to having kids

Generally positive personality

Not a hot head

Fairly competent and independant

Logos1789 · 2025-06-26T22:02:41+00:00

I would never get married.

WebNew9978 · 2025-06-26T16:27:22+00:00

What do I want in a relationship with a woman: Musts:

Someome who is attractive in my eyes

Kind

Mutual attraction for me

Understanding

Respectful

Sense of humor

Honesty

Empathy when needed

Compassion

Individual uniqueness

Boundaries

Communicates well

Take care of themselves (hygiene, grooming, etc)

Proud of who they are

Not a big deal:

Any Tattoos (not on face)

Different hobbies compared to mine

Isn’t into my hobbies but lets me continue them.

Little overweight (like they weigh a little more than me)

Doesn’t have a full knowledge of Asperger’s but at least understands and willing to learn if need be.

Smart (like if they didn’t go to college, NBD to me)

Red or blue hair (I do like blue)

Bald

Not a dealbreaker but preferably don’t want:

Smoker

Somebody who gets wasted every time they drink Unusual hair color to a degree (like purple, yelllow, green, etc.

This defiantly isn’t a marriage list but rather if I ever went on a date, here’s what I think I would like from it. Of course this list is from someone who’s never been on a date so it could have easily changed if need be.

Edit: I would never send a woman a list. I would instantly creep her out and she would ghost me.

Livid-Log7463 · 2025-06-26T19:24:25+00:00

Willing to settle for me, and maybe not extremely mean.

JohnaldJr21 · 2025-06-26T16:47:18+00:00

I find her attractive.

Makes me laugh.

Likes nature.

Reads.

Independent.

Similar values and a few shared interests so we can do stuff together.

Financially smart, I would be willing to take on a provider role but if something were to ever happen to me I would want my potential wife to not be completely lost.

Has something she’s extremely passionate about outside of work.

Works out consistently and prioritizes her health (I work out consistently and prioritize my health).

Being a religious isn’t a requirement but I became more religious this year and it could be a requirement one day in the future.

We can agree to disagree with some things politically (I’m a moderate who’s lost faith in both political parties)

I don’t have a high body count and I don’t aspire to have a high body count so I’m looking for someone who shares that value with me.

Loyal, kind, thoughtful, and affectionate but I feel like that’s a given.

Decent at communicating.

Artistic_Speech_1965 · 2025-06-26T16:17:23+00:00

a prayer
kind
supportive
patient
nuturring

And most important, someone whose life style is compatible

Stock-Argument-1040 · 2025-06-26T22:44:05+00:00

I don't have one. Am I supposed to have one? Idk the only thing that's like a hard and fast rule is that our values and goals align.

Feeling_Ad_1034 · 2025-06-27T00:22:17+00:00

I too would make a list like this if it got me engagement on social media like I’m sure it did for her.

Fan_Service_3703 · 2025-06-26T17:38:48+00:00

Fully financially self sufficient.
Sexually dominant.
Not religious or traditional.
Not right wing.
Not emotionally closed off.
Not racist, sexist (to either gender), homophobic or transphobic.
Smart/Stylish (or at least have more of a unique personal style than the generic jeans/tshirt/trainers that most people wear nowadays)
Doesn't shave legs (highly preferred but so rare it would be illogical to make it a dealbreaker)
Someone who sees the deeper aspects of society and the world and can hold their own in deep philosophical discussions.
Enjoys cuddling and affection beyond just intimacy.

My girlfriend does most of these, and we connect well enough that the rest don't matter.

Icyfemboy · 2025-06-26T15:57:26+00:00

Pretty

Normal BMI

Kind

Nurturing

Competent

Chill

FredWest_2 · 2025-06-26T16:10:09+00:00

I am married, so can I share my list of what I was looking for when I was dating with the intent of marriage instead? I actually wrote them down in a Whatsapp note at the time.

Attractive.

Fit.

Between 26-32 years old.

Loyal.

Nice.

Undergraduate degree minimum.

Doesn't live with parents (preferably homeowner).

Has a job she cares about.

Doesn't have or want kids.

Likes cats.

Doesn't do cocaine.

Doesn't mind me drinking socially.

Doesn't mind that I have a munewari/doesn't want me to stop getting tattooed.

thisaccountaintrea1 · 2025-06-26T15:55:09+00:00

Requirements:

Kindness
Good communication/conflict resolution skills
Center-left to left-wing political views
Spiritual/religious, but not to a fanatical degree.
Shared hobbies and interests (she doesn’t have to like ALL of the things I like, but I want us to be excited about at least some of the same things).
Wants 2-3 children.
Health and fitness are important to her.

Not Required, but Strongly Preferred:

Black or mixed with Black
Great ass
Likes to read

I’m not currently looking for a serious relationship, but when I do start looking for one, I’m going to attempt to screen for these qualities when deciding which women to ask out. No need to hand someone a list; you can almost always find out everything you want to know over the course of normal conversation.

nefnaf · 2025-06-26T17:49:52+00:00

ass so fat
wants to fuck my brains out morning, noon, and night

Clutterboxx · 2025-06-26T17:30:35+00:00

Massive tits

Fat jiggly ass

Tight gorrila grip pussy

No public hair

Not fat

6 feet tall

Pretty face

Blonde hair

Blue eyes

Must be German, Austrian Or Swiss

Earns 100k a year minimum

No single mothers

Must cook

No pronouns in bio

Must not watch reality TV

Virgin

Must want sex on tap

Ok_Use7 · 2025-06-26T16:02:26+00:00

Attractive

Cool

Progressive

Has to be a girl’s girl

I would never tell potential dates this. Puts pressure on them to conform to my likes and needs and I don’t want anybody to feel like that.

If somebody sent me their list of requirements before a date, I’m ghosting them.

M3taBuster · 2025-06-26T16:15:17+00:00

- Needs to be at least somewhat physically attractive to me, which in practice means somewhat pretty face, not too thin or too fat, long hair, and shorter than me. I also don't like excessive tats or piercings.

- Needs to have the same/similar sexual and relationship experience as me. In practice, that means she must be a virgin, because I'm a virgin.

- Similar lifestyle. No clubbing, partying, excessive drinking, smoking, or drugs.

- Similar values. In practice, she'd need to be right-of-center politically, as a good catch-all.

- Similar hobbies/interests. I'm a nerd, gamer, weeb, I like movies, fitness/bodybuilding, D&D, and hiking. So gotta share at least some of those.

- Just a pleasant, non-annoying personality.

Don't really care about anything else. Don't care about confidence, ambition, anything financial, could be jobless or homeless for all I care. Doesn't even need to be particularly smart or funny.

And no, I wouldn't outright list my requirements to a date. But I'd obviously be internally vetting for these things.

Gold_Sheepherder6569 · 2025-06-26T16:36:43+00:00

Be at least a 4 in terms of looks
Be kind and pleasant to be around
Have some ass
Don’t be obese, overweight is acceptable but not obese
Don’t be bad with money
No older than 40
Don’t hold bigoted political beliefs

thunderchungus1999 · 2025-06-26T22:21:46+00:00

To everyone who's hellbent on not dating overweight women...

Cowards lol

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Gravel_Roads · 2025-06-26T17:14:04+00:00

I’ve been with my LTE for over a decade and known them for almost 3 decades. So I’d say their characteristics ring my chimes the most.

They’re always growing and changing.

They care about what they care about no matter what other people care about.

They’re creative and write and make art.

They can move quick and make decisive changes when the pressure is on.

They can relax when the pressure is passed.

AreOut · 2025-06-26T17:25:26+00:00

Respect&integrity(not allowing her "friendies" to decide for her), everything else is less important.

yourfavoriteblackguy · 2025-06-26T17:28:43+00:00

Likes me and vice versa

Kind

Competent

Chill

Okay with being better at somethings and vice versa

Not locked into gender roles on either side

Good Listener

Accepts responsibility/accountability

Independent

Not afraid to voice their opinion

No. I don't share this. I go on a date and throughout the date I determine if they have these attributes.

Also these are not REQUIREMENTS but things I look for. However if they lets say are good listener, but aren't as free with gender roles as I like that's not a deal breaker.

Ruztomski · 2025-06-26T19:45:49+00:00

That she doesn't send lists of requirements to human beings.

ThanosSnapsSlimJims · 2025-06-26T20:27:42+00:00

If he loves her more than she loves him, and it's not equal, there's gonna be resentment. 300k salary? Basically, she wants to be a trophy wife.

Wants to protect her even if divorce? WHAT She wants a simp.

voxpopuliberty · 2025-06-26T21:54:38+00:00

Virgin

I care about other things but they're negotiable

Trancetastic16 · 2025-06-26T22:24:09+00:00

I do my best to be direct as soon as possible when meeting new people in general because I’m an unconventional dating prospect filtering for similar.

My requirements for a romantic partner would be:

Bi-romantic, because I’m Non-binary
Monogamous
Mutual attraction (including aesthetic attraction if they are Asexual)
Child-free
Is okay with Pets
Mutual compatible life values, for me that would be living a peaceful life as a left-leaning Centrist…
…and anti-marriage…
…and frugal.
Fully open to and willing to engage in switching gender roles and dynamics whether she specifically enjoys them too or does so for my sake
Self-sufficient with her income and lifestyle, including if she were a safe prostitute or homeless so long as she is shelter-secure.
Takes decent care of her health and hygiene.
At least some shared hobbies related to entertainment/art/sports/learning about the world/travel/recreational drugs/etc.

Ultramega39 · 2025-06-26T22:50:35+00:00

Between the age of 19-24

Shares similar values. Like family, loyalty, honesty.

Isn't promiscuous

Is compassionate, kind, ambitious.

Is slim or fit

Is willing to take things slowly in a relationship.

Wants to have children and is good with children.

Isn't a Athiest.

Doesn't constantly talk about politics

Isn't a political extremist (far left or far right)

Has intresting hobbies

Likes cats

r2k398 · 2025-06-27T00:21:12+00:00

Faithfulness, honest, intelligent, considerate, family oriented, financially stable, responsible, and not promiscuous.

Goonerlouie · 2025-06-27T00:27:58+00:00

Only one requirement for me:

All other typical requirements must be sacrificed for the greater good of the relationship. Individuality must be eliminated for the collective. Especially if there are kids involved

SteveSan82 · 2025-06-27T04:37:02+00:00

Virgin.

MistaCreepz · 2025-06-27T18:26:16+00:00

A face that will still look good when she's old

I like being around them all the time

That's all it really took to marry my wife... the rest of her issues we've worked on along the way... mine too

James_M_Croft · 2025-06-28T15:06:04+00:00

Sexual satisfying.
Reasonable
Not an annoyance.
Self controlled.
Mature.

midnight_blue77 · 2025-06-29T05:57:23+00:00

I'm anti-marriage so...

The only way a woman will ever get a ring on my finger is by slipping it on my cold dead hand.

You should probably rephrase your question and ask what do we require in order to commit to a woman.

Also, I have noticed that a lot of guys here are just mirroring the rehearsed and phony answers that women often say when they're asked this same question. They're not being genuinely honest about what they're looking for.

Throw_r_a_2021 · 2025-06-26T16:22:54+00:00

Attractive (to me)

No tattoos

Not career oriented

Never married before

No children

Compatible personality

I will almost certainly never get married. Fine with it though. I’ve seen how great a toll that a failed marriage can have. If I can’t get married to my idea of a perfect 10, why would I bother taking the risk?

Ok_Play4544 · 2025-06-26T16:17:01+00:00

Prenup!

Environmental_Day558 · 2025-06-26T16:22:47+00:00

Her post is 100% rage bait lmao. She sprinkled some reasonable things to make it seem legit.

I'm already married though I can post requirements from before then. One hard non negotiable is no kids and do not want any kids ever. Could be perfect in every way but that's a deal breaker.

Requirements: Attractive. Not demanding 10/10 supermodel but I had to like looking at her. Enjoy her presence, Not a mean, rude or condescending person. Goals in life align (for example if she wants to backpack across different foreign countries for half the year each year that wouldn't work out due to my work). No hard drugs, anything snorted or injected is a no.

Preferences: Fit. Good with handling money. Not of an Abrahamic religion (idc what she believes but I'm not religious and not converting back). Younger but not too much younger, mid 20s range is fine. Doesn't club hop. Plays video games.

growframe · 2025-06-26T16:24:58+00:00

I don't want a wife, but for an LTR

Attractive

Enjoyable to be around

Enjoyable to date

Similar-ish values

Alligns with my lifestyle

Also, do you share that with your dates?

No

HandCoversBruises · 2025-06-26T17:07:35+00:00

Tall, beautiful, happy to be around, not dumb, thick thighs.

TopShelfSnipes · 2025-06-26T18:35:31+00:00

In no particular order,

Physical Attraction
Sex-positive views
Mutual Interests
Has own interests, willing to indulge my key ones
An "introverted extrovert" or an "extrovered introvert" (Someone who has the capacity for both)
Gainfully employed
Believes in egalitarian relationships, "partner in crime mentality"
Self-sufficient
Financially responsible
Capable of getting around on her own
Sense of humor, capacity for sarcasm
Openmindedness, naturally curious
College educated, intelligent
Physically fit/active lifestyle
Shared goals in life and shared preferred lifestyle, along with a plan to attain both
American or Canadian family and extended family that is fully Westernized
Enjoys music and the outdoors
Heterosexual, cisgender, with compatible preferences for sex
Not rushing to marriage
Dates for fun, not like a job interview
Capable of having fun together
Suitable age

Got them all in my wife.

Embarrassed-Neat6745 · 2025-06-26T16:12:30+00:00

At this point, I’d marry any woman with integrity, character, and merit.

As far as I can tell, they don’t exist.

SuperSpartan13 · 2025-06-26T18:04:22+00:00

Must be around my age or a few years younger
Must always be and have been very sexually conservative (2- body count)
Must have never had or is currently carrying a child
Must not have any major genetic deformities or diseases(stds)
Must not be considered obese and be willing/able to have a fitness oriented lifestyle, overweight is fine
Must be at least 5 feet tall and under 6 3, preferably my height
Must not have debt over 20k
Must have not partaken in hard drugs, and be willing to quit soft drugs, (nicotine/smoking, alcohol, weed).
No large/numerous tattoos or piercings/branding/other body mods, preferably none
Must be chill/not high maintenance
Must not accept polygamy
Must speak decent english
Must not have a felony or heavy time in prison

pretty sure this weeds out every possibility

MalePsychopath · 2025-06-26T19:25:07+00:00

not older than 20
pretty face (min 7/10)
great body (small waist, wide hips, great tits and ass)
super virgin (khhv)
IQ above 130
kind, nurturing, compassionate, supportive
likes animals and children
agreeable
funny
kinky with a high sex drive
rich parents
parents not divorced
keeps body always hairless
not a feminist
extremely attracted to me, almost obsessed
polite and has good manners
curious and playful
enjoys cooking and cleaning
determined to stay thin and fit for as long as possible
no long or fake nails
dresses well when in public
no baggage (not jaded or bitter)
no major disabilities
no major mental illnesses
atheist or agnostic
good with money
humble
not jealous
laughs in a good sounding way
not materialistic
not too far left or right politically
takes care of her health
long hair
good teeth
doesn’t smoke
doesn’t drink excessively
doesn’t take any dangerous drugs
good communicator
pleasant voice
smells fantastic
long fingers and toes
artistic talent (must be good at something like drawing/painting, writing, singing or playing an instrument)
doesn’t talk too much
honest
loyal
minimal tattoos and piercings

nonquitt · 2025-06-26T19:41:27+00:00

Just a few things but it narrows it down a lot:

Must have:

Top school or “equivalent”

7/10 without makeup

I light up when around her

Freak in sheets

Nice to have:

Tits and ass — can compromise. Smart girls have small boobs for some reason.

Lower-Director1043 · 2025-06-26T17:07:34+00:00

Looks good naked, and a solid routine to maintain it,

-pretty

-stem bachelor's degree i dont want no bum with debt !

-Can cook well 3 meals a day/all days of the week

-Can not make everything about herself

-a woman's values are pointless cause when your life is easy, you can have all the values in the world

-can take care of my parents

-good with kids

-not addicted to social media and celebrity gossip

Title	Q4M: to What is on your list of requirements for a wife?
Author	Windmill_flowers
Upvotes	4
Comments	214
Date	June 26, 2025 3:42 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1ll3f42/q4m_to_what_is_on_your_list_of_requirements_for_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4m-to-what-is-on-your-list-of-requirements-for-a.1555640 https://theredarchive.com/post/1555640

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