Q4M: How do you define “fat”?

MalePsychopath · 2023-05-05T13:58:21+00:00

It’s a visual judgement. If you have too much body fat or a poor fat distribution, you’re considered "fat".

satisfiedmind- · 2023-05-05T13:25:12+00:00

Body structures vary wildly which contributes to someone’s overall appearance, along with muscle mass.
For example models with very small waists tend to have long bodies, meaning there’s more space for internal organs. People women with short bodies will be wider and never get such a small waist.

I live in the UK and I’m recovered anorexic. I’ve never been overweight, so these factors might affect my classification. The women in those images seem a bit plump/overweight, but not obese.

Extreme-Boot-8792 · 2023-05-05T13:01:20+00:00

probably the same how they define "short"

just my 2 cents

udxxr · 2023-05-05T13:03:52+00:00

Men are going by looks. No one's asking a girl their BMI before rejecting them.

I think we can agree though that there are people who can hide the weight well, and there are people whose weight is plainly obvious. I recall a fun little experiment a poster did a few months ago where they had a lineup of overweight men and women and asked people to rate their attractiveness; maybe someone can do the same for individuals who may be teetering between normal and over weight.

There may be cultural factors in there too. As I'm Chinese I'd consider all the women in that picture are absolutely overweight at least. But black and latino americans might think some of those women are a normal or even healthy weight, since obesity is more common in their communities.

Mr_Chad_Thunderpenis · 2023-05-05T13:34:08+00:00

Those women look fat to me. End of story.

Rahim556 · 2023-05-05T14:50:08+00:00

I said this in another post and I'll say it again here:

Just because the average girl/person in America is fat, doesn't mean I'll accept that as average. We have an obesity epidemic in this country. Never in the history of our entire species have we been this fat. Fat is not "normal," no matter how widespread it becomes. I'm not attracted to fat. So if 50% of the girls in the dateable age are fat, those 50% are eliminated off the bat as even being potential options. So they don't play into the average for me. Also, the average woman in the world isn't fat, go to India or Thailand or any number of countries and most women won't be fat there. Our attraction doesn't change to "adapt to what's around us," it's largely static and ingrained through thousands of years of evolution. Just like if every man in America suddenly became 5 feet tall. Women wouldn't adapt to start liking that. It would be unattractive still.

When I think "average," I don't think of a statistical average, because being fat is a choice ultimately. Every single person on this earth has the potential to not be fat as it's nothing more than simple math and the laws of thermodynamics, calories in calories out. Someone being fat has made a decision, one way or another, that the effort required to not be fat is not worth it (because it does require serious effort for some, I don't deny that).

So to me an "average woman" means baseline normal, neither negative nor positive. For example, a 5 is a woman who's not fat (which would be negative) but also not fit and toned (which would be positive), and her face is not ugly (which would be negative) but also not beautiful (which would be positive).

Even if we got to where 90% of ppl were morbidly obese and 600lbs for example, that will never be average or normal for me, and I cannot accept that, as it's not normal and a choice to let yourself go.

Same for men too btw. An "average man's body" is not fat, but also not muscular and cut. Just normal. The difference is men tend to find a not fat/normal woman's body attractive, while women tend to not find a normal man's body attractive.

And btw: all the women in the picture on this post are fat (or at least overweight). The one on the far left isn't fat fat, just bigger than I prefer (I like slim and petite women). I would still hit it tho. The 2nd from the left I would hit it too, as she's more "thick" (but still fat) as her stomach looks flat(ter). Still much bigger than I prefer tho.

tawny-she-wolf · 2023-05-05T13:29:57+00:00

I feel like these days people forget how quickly you can be objectively (BMI) obese (unless you’re a professional athlete where muscle mass flaws BMI). In a lot of people’s minds “fat” = my 600lb life morbidly obese but anything less severe than that is “curvy” or something

Now in terms of attractiveness some people wear it better than others depending on how tall or well proportioned they are.

biscuitcatapult · 2023-05-05T14:09:01+00:00

Height is numerical/quantitative. Weight is numerical/quantitative.

Fat is a qualitative description we give to someone that visually addresses the balance between height and weight.

There is no magic cutoff number that means a person is fat or not, because it’s all relative to the observer.

BMI does it’s best to quantify obesity, but it’s not a perfect measurement tool, since it goes off pure numbers instead of visual appraisal.

wtknight · 2023-05-05T14:09:13+00:00

Body fat percentage is the real measure, but this is harder to calculate than BMI, so most men use an eyeball test. Many men want a woman to have a BF% of 21 to 24 percent, which signifies fitness. Some men will accept up to 32%. Anything above that should probably be considered overweight, although some chubby chaser guys don’t mind that.

ComfortableOk5003 · 2023-05-05T16:02:05+00:00

All the women in the picture are fat, I don’t find them attractive

Ps stating most men aren’t attracted to fat women isn’t hating on fat women

IceC19 · 2023-05-05T13:54:09+00:00

And a reminder that complaining about girls being undatable by being fat means nothing if you’re talking to an American because the average person in that country is fat. Only 1 in 3 adults in the USA are the recommended weight for their size.

It actually means you wouldn't date a fat woman, point.

The obesity levels in younger people are quite a bit lower than that of the general population.

Also, I thought you weren't obligated to accept what is available to you and could just stay single.

Mandy_M87 · 2023-05-05T13:26:50+00:00

If someone is clinically obese, they are fat. If they are overweight, but not quite obese, I'd say they are chubby.

Note: I say this as a fat person

politicsthrowaway230 · 2023-05-05T12:56:26+00:00

Tbqh I don't think these people are fat to the point I would consider them unattractive. None of them look particularly close to morbidly obese. To me they look completely fine. Am I blind?

Looking at the BMIs, they've picked women slap bang on the border between overweight and obese as well.

Hard_Corsair · 2023-05-05T13:17:17+00:00

My personal view is that the difference between thick and fat is whether the body is bouncy or floppy. That means you really need to see someone in motion to make that call, rather than a static picture, unless they're obviously morbidly obese. That also accounts for different distributions on different people.

LoopyPro · 2023-05-05T14:17:16+00:00

Body-mass index (BMI) seems to provide an accurate enough indication. (aside from exceptions like muscle mass or missing limbs)

BMI > 25 by definition means overweight. I can't speak for everyone, but it seems fair to assume that generally above a certain index value, a negative correlation between BMI and attractiveness occurs. The exact point where a woman is considered 'fat' is of course subjective, but not random.

quaker5 · 2023-05-05T14:26:55+00:00

to me, fat means rolls and flaps but I like bigger girls so the threshold is a bit high.

RedditAlt999 · 2023-05-05T15:25:04+00:00

If a woman is 170+, typically she passes the eye test for "fat", depending on height and build of course.

King-SAMO · 2023-05-05T16:58:21+00:00

The FUPA, her waist/hip ratio, and cottage cheesiness; women can be quite heavy and still be dead sexy as long as these three features are square.

its a bit of a catch 22; bigger women can be very attractive, but it usually takes nearly as much work as fit women put in.

Heinz37_sauce · 2023-05-05T17:45:11+00:00

To me, fat = obese. None of the women in the title photo are truly fat.

96tillinfinity_ · 2023-05-05T21:06:59+00:00

The thing is men, especially different races of men have different definitions of “fat”

Black men are much more likely to be attracted to heavier/thicker women than other races so their definition of fat and, say, a white man’s definition of fat can be very different

As a black guy who grew up with equal amount of white and black guys, I cant stress this enough

Neat_Coyote_8187 · 2023-05-05T23:39:00+00:00

At the very least don't weigh more than me.

TheRedPillRipper · 2023-05-05T13:09:08+00:00

how are guys defining fat?

Initially it’s The Eye Ball Test. As there’s no hiding it. Objective metrics like BMI aren’t really factor. Unless one is right into programming, and nutrition, most go by appearances.

That said there are products out there, that can deceive. My partner used them postpartum. So that’s a factor too.

Godspeed and good luck!

Workaholiconew · 2023-05-05T13:33:18+00:00

Q4M: How do you define “fat”?

Obviously it varies amongst people. For example, as a Brazilian, most of what americans would consider "normal weight" is considered fat in most of Brazil. And Of course someone with big breasts/ass but no belly would not be considered fat.

But considering the following image. I would say any woman with more than 30% of fat would be considered "starting to get fat/chubby". With 40% without a doubt be considered fat.

how are guys defining fat? Are we talking a few pounds overweight? Obese? Morbid obesity? Are we using the BMI? Are you just going by looks?

Outside of professional settings (some of us are doctors after all) most men define fat as "someone whose amount of fat deposits, significantly decrease our sexual attraction".

Are you aware people distribute fat differently?

Yes, but at a point it is irrelevant, if you are 40% fat... you need some absurd level of odd distribution of fat to be attractive.

And a reminder that complaining about girls being undatable by being fat means nothing if you’re talking to an American because the average person in that country is fat.

It is biology, we just dont like fat people, and dont wanna be suffering for tolerating someone we dont like around us, there is nothing you, or anyone can do about it.

It is like saying women should be forced to marry those they dislike.

Devourer_of_felines · 2023-05-05T15:26:58+00:00

Take a closer look at the photo - it’s airbrushed to hell and they’re literally posing to look as flattering as possible.

If you’re asking for a rule of thumb; if you by default have a noticeable double chin or your waist is more than half of your height; you’re fat.

UnusualInjury5506 · 2023-05-05T13:25:59+00:00

The red pill doesn’t hate fat women. It doesn’t hate anyone. It simply states the facts. Most men find fat women unattractive or less attractive than fit women. That’s a fact but “fat” is a relative term. Most men will call obese women fat but they may not consider overweight women to be fat. The answer to your question is that men are not really defining it they are just looking at how big a women appears to be and deciding for themselves if they find that woman attractive or if she is to fat based how she looks. So it’s subjective to the man. Generally speaking the more a woman weighs the less men are going to find her attractive.

noafrochamplusamurai · 2023-05-05T13:54:55+00:00

The rule for fat or not is simple, does your gut hang over your belt?Do you have more cellulite than muscle? Weight, and BMI aren't very useful until you hit the extreme ends. I'm 6'2, and according to bMI scale, 160 lbs is a healthy weight for an adult male of my height......

politicsthrowaway230 · 2023-05-05T13:04:15+00:00

I don't define fat? I actually don't even think about whether someone is 'fat' or not. I look at a women and men as whole people, not as physical attributes. To me it's not a "fat woman", it's who that person is.

I have been attracted to women who have been called fat by others. I have been unattracted to women who would be considered "fit" or "sexy". Attraction is about the whole package, the whole person, not just one or two things about a person. I made a conscious decision not to think about weight of other people that much, and only worry about my own weight as it relates to my health.

AreOut · 2023-05-05T15:47:37+00:00

it's individual, I'd say anything more than 15% BF for man and 20% for woman is fat, so I'm technically fat as well (at 20%)

bread93096 · 2023-05-05T16:33:26+00:00

I think all these women look sexy, and imo preferable to thin girls, I wouldn’t consider any of them fat. Most I wouldn’t even call chubby, besides the one on the far right. I’d guess they’re around 25-30% body fat, I’d consider 30-35% to be chubby, and 35%+ to be fat. Even then, there are some fat women I find attractive, mostly because they still have an hourglass shape, and their tits/ass are bigger than their stomach.

MoldovaImComing · 2023-05-05T14:42:17+00:00

If you don’t workout for an hour 5 days a week and don’t eat clean, you’re fat.

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Treacle-Flimsy · 2023-05-05T14:14:59+00:00

When I mean fat, I mean "can't do basic tasks, have a wheelchair because I can't walk, didn't shower for x days because I can't" fat

Ohmaygahh · 2023-05-05T14:19:45+00:00

The World Health Organization states "Overweight and obesity are defined as abnormal or excessive fat accumulation that presents a risk to health. A body mass index (BMI) over 25 is considered overweight, and over 30 is obese. The issue has grown to epidemic proportions, with over 4 million people dying each year as a result of being overweight or obese in 2017 according to the global burden of disease."

It is regrettable that the WHO, an important and oft used resource the world over, uses BMI as I believe, and the National Institutes of Health says, "Because BMI utilizes only body weight and height and does not take into account overall body composition, including muscle weight, muscular individuals may be classified as obese. Consequently, even though it is widely accepted, BMI may actually be a poor indicator for obesity in the adolescent athletic population."

Because of this, BMI is an extremely imperfect metric to identify individuals that are fat. This metric should be retired. I believe bodyfat% is the superior metric to use to ascertain whether someone is fat or obese.

What is considered lean or carrying excess fat differs between man and woman. A woman at 20% bodyfat can be considered very fit while a man at 20% bodyfat is on cusp of average/regular/to slightly getting in shape.

My definition of a woman being "fat", meaning her carrying extra weight is actively making her less attractive, would be a woman's body fat % being 30 or more. Pay less attention to the scale weight, and more on what your body looks like compared to the sample pictures. You don't need to get a DEXA scan ( Dual-energy absorptiometry , widely considered the most accurate method for body composition analysis trusted by research and elite sports labs across the world today) to know whether you are fit or fat.

Ciabatta_Scoober · 2023-05-05T14:23:04+00:00

Waist to height ratio has been shown to be a better health indicator than BMI, with a general cutoff that waist circumference should be half a person’s height or less.

I don’t think guys can look at someone and judge this exact ratio, but in general can tell how wide they are at their waist compared to how tall they are.

lolthankstinder · 2023-05-05T14:47:31+00:00

I would consider the women in the link you sent to just be "out of shape", not fat. The female equivalent of this might be disliking guys that are very thin and skinny without any muscle mass because they just sit on their computer all day not eating or moving.

There's a site called My Body Gallery where women can upload pictures with their height and weight. Looking through that, I determined that I tend to find women within the US CDC healthy BMI range of 18-25 as having the most attractive bodies across all heights. Around 25 and above, it starts to vary. Muscle is more dense than fat (example pic). Progress pic comparisons show that women can be the exact same weight but look more lean and fit by replacing fat with lean tissue/muscle through consistent diet and exercise. Women with higher BMIs due to more lean tissue still look great.

In terms of dating/redpill, I think testosterone makes it easier for guys to develop lean tissue so it's not as significant in filtering guys. As a result, women may pay more attention to other, potentially invariant qualities like height which can be very frustrating to a lot of more mentally/economically/vertically "average" lean men.

OpticalEpilepsy · 2023-05-05T14:49:40+00:00

I personally go by stomach is wider laterally than hips

Most men go by noticeably above average weight to height ratio irrespective of proportionality

thedeadpill · 2023-05-05T14:57:11+00:00

I don’t think anyone’s asking for a potential partner’s BMI. I would say ‘fat’ is just shorthand for ‘unattractive because they’re bigger than I’d like’. In your image, all of them are fat, though some of them are more attractive than others because of the way they carry it.

But, I wouldn’t say there’s some BMI line or fat percentage I won’t cross except at unreasonably high levels (like, it’s very likely I won’t find someone with a BMI of 40 or 40% body fat attractive).

SecondEldenLord · 2023-05-05T15:44:41+00:00

I am a personal fitness trainer so any bmi above 25 is considered overweight and any bmi over 30 is obese. Obesity is also an actual medical condition that puts you at risk of coronary heart disease, stroke, sleep apnea, etc.

SoulBadguy0408 · 2023-05-05T17:27:35+00:00

I think the proper way to define fat is going to medically depend on various factors as far as how much it impacts your health, although as far as using fat to say I won't date morbidly obese women that'd be the point where it'd be a turn off for me. I don't mind an overweight woman, but there obviously are limits

revente · 2023-05-05T17:42:18+00:00

Overweight.

I'm a 191cm 100 kg guy with some muscle and all of my gfs were about 170-175 cm 50-55 kgs with long slender legs.

I don't like chubbies. But it's not like i feel the need to insult them.

Women from the photo are clearly out of shape.

StopTheIncels · 2023-05-05T18:28:07+00:00

I'm going to say this for the 6969th time. A BMI > 24. Balk at me all you want about how it's not a good measurement of individual 'fatness'. It's the literal medical definition.

ryboto · 2023-05-05T18:52:25+00:00

I can visually determine...fat wrists/arms and thick ankles? hiding fat...but necks and faces can give it away. On dating profiles if they only show their face, it's generally questionable.

prettymuchredpilled · 2023-05-05T20:32:57+00:00

Proportionally high levels of body fat with a poor distribution. There is no exact quantification behind this (it varies somewhat depending on men's preferences) but for example someone like Lizzo I would consider undeniably obese.

purplish_possum · 2023-05-05T21:01:56+00:00

If her circumference is greater than her height she fat.

Ohyarlysmiles · 2023-05-05T21:38:32+00:00

omeone gave links to women who would be considered obese based on their BMI

Those women look pretty chubby.

the average girl is technically fat

Yup. That's a 5 in America.

Wooden_Ad_2591 · 2023-05-05T21:39:42+00:00

Adipose tissue

DapperDan1929 · 2023-05-05T21:57:46+00:00

Women’s boobs get smaller when they lose weight lol

2023-05-05T22:47:41+00:00

25 pounds overweight to anyone over 100 pounds overweight and beyond

SkookumTree · 2023-05-06T02:04:28+00:00

Ballpark? BMI 35+; there's maybe 5 points' worth of wiggle room there for the powerlifting types and maybe those that got lucky with fat distribution.

If your BMI's 40 or above, you're carrying excess fat.

bootyhunter69420 · 2023-05-06T04:55:54+00:00

Give me a person and I will tell you. Women wear their weight differently. And it can be relative to the man doing the judging.

just_a_place · 2023-05-06T08:02:49+00:00

Fat = Deformed.

MxMaster9907 · 2023-05-06T09:42:20+00:00

For me being overweight is being fat.

Imo, men start looking chubby at 20% body fat

Women start looking chubby at 25% body fat

BeepBeepYeah7789 · 2023-05-06T14:23:58+00:00

Like some others have said, it's kind of a subjective thing.

It's POSSIBLE for me to consider a woman "fat", yet still be attracted to her.

Some smaller women are attractive to me; some are unattractive

Some bigger women are attractive to me; some are unattractive.

The criteria I personally use are these (and they don't necessarily have to all apply to the same woman):

If her upper arms are bigger than my thighs

If she "waddles" when she walks

If she has rolls and flaps

If her butt is big enough that I could sit on it.

If she gets winded and out of breath too quickly

If her breasts end up under her arms.

In any case, I prefer a woman who has enough fat and muscle that I can give her a hug without "breaking" her.

bifewova234 · 2023-05-07T12:58:30+00:00

BMI and body fat percentage, the latter being more meaningful but difficult to measure accurately.

captaindestucto · 2023-05-08T02:39:54+00:00

40 years ago this "body type" would have been rare.

Title	Q4M: How do you define “fat”?
Author	LillthOfBabylon
Upvotes	15
Comments	181
Date	May 5, 2023 12:47 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/138knmc/q4m_how_do_you_define_fat/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4m-how-do-you-define-fat.1218087 https://theredarchive.com/post/1218087

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