There is a double standard where it's socially acceptable for women to be rude and controlling with their male partners.

Former_Range_1730 · 2025-01-20T14:38:47+00:00

Ofcourse. That's why men should stick with women who actually like men, and stay away from the women who hate men. As the women who like men tend to not be rude or controlling.

And when they are rude and controlling, it's more in a light hearted way where you know she loves and respects you. While the women who hate men are venomous.

Woke_Wacker · 2025-01-20T14:51:59+00:00

The double standard extends much further than these examples. For example, any statement generalising women is quickly pointed out as mysogony, but the same people who condemn such statements often use statements such as, 'not all men but always a man', blissfully unaware they are commiting to the sexist rhetoric they supposedly condemn.

There are many double standards in modern society pertaining to men and women. All you can do is call it out whenever you see it and hold people accountable for their double standards.

hearyoume14 · 2025-01-20T20:46:49+00:00

I’ve seen both men and women be abused with my own eyes and the reaction to it is markedly different. If a man says a female partner abused him it’s automatically “What did you do you do to make her mad?” while if it’s the opposite there is more concern for the female victim even if some people are jerks about it.

TermAggravating8043 · 2025-01-20T13:55:24+00:00

This just shows what your viewing mate. It’s your algorithm and everyone one of your “sources” is a TikTok video designed as bait for men like you.

This is not normal relationships, and if you believe only woman are rude or controlling of their partners you are either being exceptionally naive or you are deliberately ignoring the domestic abuse numbers.

Clean-Luck6428 · 2025-01-20T19:28:55+00:00

Met up with a long time friend I hadn’t seen from high school. We started chatting about building PCs. His gf overhears the conversation and walks over. She interrupts him and says “not everyone is interested in your nerdy hobbies” when we’ve literally helped each other with PC builds in the past.

Even though I wasn’t the target. I was a little depressed for a few days after

kexavah558ask · 2025-01-21T16:28:35+00:00

4 clear examples of this in my close family, 3 of which I got to witness up close quite often. Men who are treated like shit, humiliated for their interests and activities, who cater to every whim of their wives every waking moment; who, clearly against their will, back their wives when the latter start unreasonable conflicts with other family members or third parties.

It pains me so much how I couldn't be with my grandfather as much as I wanted in his later years because my narc grandmother raged against me for perceived slights (not feeding her god complex),and demanded that he joined her, which he did out of fear, apologising behind her back.

My mother married a narc abuser like this grandmother of mine, my father. The difference is that she stood her ground, as she was encouraged to by others, and eventually they separated.

The women? They kept mistreating their husbands until the latter died, or still do to this day. No consequences, a chilling fear of calling them out grasps everybody around them, as their husbands would react in anger at anyone who suggested that it's not healthy.

Seeing it so many times I'm wary of yielding to any chick's attitude. It doesn't get better, and I'm better off alone than with that energy in my life.

SnooCats37 · 2025-01-20T15:33:28+00:00

Op you really need to stop using social media algorithms as sources for what you perceive as reality in society. The more you watch something, the more that comes up. It makes it seem like issues are bigger than they are. Men and women can be awful to each other, they both can be abusive to their partners. It doesn’t mean in general there is a double standard. In reality, it doesn’t matter which partner was being nasty, they would be called out for it and rightfully so.

MrTTripz · 2025-01-20T15:23:51+00:00

It depends what the motivation of the comment is, the context and the tone:

"You're not really going to wear that, are you?"

This could be anywhere on a spectrum from controlling/abusive to honest/helpful.

Situation A:

Person W and Person H are getting ready to go to a dinner party. Person W controls Person H's access to their mobile phone and their bank account. If Person H tries to spend time with friends, person W gives them the silent treatment.

Person H is putting on clothes that person W deems inappropriate. It is said in an aggressive tone. If person H defies person W, there will be consequences.

Situation B:

Person J and Person S are getting ready to go to a dinner party. J & S have a healthy and equal relationship.

Person S is putting on clothes that person J deems inappropriate. It is said in a exaggeratedly shocked tone. A playful disagreement follows where both parties bring up examples in the past where their taste hasn't matched. If person J defies person S, there will be no consequences.

Controlling and abusive behaviour is frowned upon, but not all behaviour is controlling and abusive.

No-Rough-7390 · 2025-01-20T15:08:51+00:00

Women “wearing the pants” in the relationship has largely been normalized via the media and crap tv shoved down our throats for about 25-30 years. You say that, people will chuckle and no one bats an eye.

You say that the guy has the final say, people immediately assume some kind of abuse is at play (even at it’s lowest level).

Pretty fucked up.

Equal_Connect · 2025-01-20T14:09:58+00:00

Pussy whipped is a real thing where men are so scared of their wife leaving they will do literally anything to please them and the word no is not in their vocabulary. Typically these dudes end up getting cheated on or divorced because the woman doesnt take them seriously since they dont have a backbone or any balls to stand up for themselves.

Obvious_Smoke3633 · 2025-01-20T14:14:25+00:00

This is a meme trend by men for men lmao. You take actual online memes and have an existential crisis over it. The dad in the first video is hysterically laughing with his wife and joking around. They look like they've been married for 20 plus years, so what if his wife tells him to tuck his shirt in so his belly isn't poking out? My boyfriend tells me I have broccoli in my teeth all the time so I don't walk around looking stupid. None of these things are insulting.

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throwaway1276444 · 2025-01-21T09:37:59+00:00

I am not taking the abuse angle here. But this has been like this since I was a child.

If a guy wants his girl to dress a certain way it is sexist. Yet wives all over are getting their men to dress to their preferences.

If a gay asks a girl to shave, sexist. Yet women will tell their man exactly what should be shaved and what shouldn't.

Wife can comment on her husbands weight, man should not.

I have met many women that conform to the same standards for men and women and are not sexist about it. Yet that is still out of choice, not societal pressure.

OwnedIGN · 2025-01-21T10:03:03+00:00

🤷🏻‍♂️I’m just gonna say it; I am okay with some double standards.

SliceNDice432 · 2025-01-21T16:24:31+00:00

I mean, these are just weak "men" that let it happen. Nip that ish in the bud the first and it won't happen.

Fickle_Friendship296 · 2025-01-21T18:34:38+00:00

That's why you don't deal with those types of women. It's that easy.

Schleudergang1400 · 2025-01-22T11:25:03+00:00

So you think i won't be able to find examples of rude and controlling men, where the comments agree with the man and say it's about her not respecting him? Where it's clear, that the woman could not control the man the same way?

spaffedupthewall · 2025-01-20T19:56:30+00:00

Glad to see the comments on this one make sense. A lot of women either hate men, or begrudgingly 'put up with them'. The minority of women who aren't like this will never make the kinds of comments in your post.

oppositegeneva · 2025-01-20T15:21:29+00:00

I’ve witnessed this, but only with the women my brother dates…and he seems to only date psycho’s.

Everlovingwhat1010 · 2025-01-20T16:36:53+00:00

I agree. I do think there is a bit of a double standard when it comes to clothing.

SnoopyDru · 2025-01-20T15:23:02+00:00

Enforce your boundaries and leave.

DapperDan1929 · 2025-01-20T17:15:42+00:00

*says

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Just_Natural_9027 · 2025-01-20T14:19:56+00:00

There’s plenty of opposite type relationships.

rag3light · 2025-01-20T19:17:32+00:00

Modern society embraces the infernal hence women are celebrated for leading and fighting men.

Bottom line: whenever a woman disrespects you you need to treat it as though satan himself appeared and proceed accordingly.

Usually the answer is to just drop her.

AlmostKindaGreat · 2025-01-20T20:05:29+00:00

It's a double edged sword.

Men are expected to be strong and without insecurities. A disadvantage is that they are freely tested for this at any time and if they display insecurity it's considered their fault for being weak.

Women are expected to not be as strong, which is a disadvantage. An advantage is that it's considered out of bounds to poke at their insecurities.

Quad-Banned120 · 2025-01-21T01:37:21+00:00

Source: my personally curated ragebait / brainrot algorithm

ThatBitchA · 2025-01-20T16:32:57+00:00

You're interpreting silly jokes as rude and controlling.

I've seen that video is hilarious. It's a bunch of comments that are said over the course of a long-term relationship where's mutual respect and admiration.

They couple is laughing. They are having at the remarks she's made.

This feels like not understanding the difference between rude and controlling and a healthy laugh filled relationship.

Inabind369 · 2025-01-20T14:48:42+00:00

Have you experienced this with any women you’ve been in relationships with? I’ve never experienced it

EetinAintCheetin · 2025-01-20T19:27:24+00:00

I’d like to see a woman try that with me.

Appropriate_Cow1378 · 2025-01-21T02:38:23+00:00

I think this is just a over-balancing socially because for most of history women literally had zero real choices. We didn't get to choose who our partners were, we didn't get to choose how many children we had, we didn't even get the choice of saying no to sex (see: 1993, when marital rape was outlawed in all 50 states. That's only a decade before I was born..)

That being said, I think most well-balanced people recognize a healthy relationship isn't controlling. A controlling relationship is an abusive one, and I think if your partners are dismissive and callous if you brining up how you feel about that gets you called a wimp.

Nobodyz_Nikki · 2025-01-21T00:07:58+00:00

Yes, there are double standards in life. It's a double standard for men to murder their wives and children and society be desensitized to it but when a wife does it then there's a cause for concern about what's happening to women's ability to nurture and be nonviolent.

And sorry to tell you this but there are some men that enjoy it and feel better because of their wives rudeness. There's literally a name for it...

Anyways, they're men and they'll survive.

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Title	There is a double standard where it's socially acceptable for women to be rude and controlling with their male partners.
Author	Glass-Carpenter8963
Upvotes	168
Comments	358
Date	January 20, 2025 1:48 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1i5qj31/there_is_a_double_standard_where_its_socially/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/there-is-a-double-standard-where-its-socially.1541682 https://theredarchive.com/post/1541682

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