Do you see men's very low standards for sex as a good or bad thing?

paidshill29 · 2023-03-18T19:32:42+00:00

As a man who has refused sex with women who don't meet my standards, I view men who have extremely low standards as desperate and pathetic. I absolutely see it as a bad thing.

RatchedAngle · 2023-03-18T19:16:48+00:00

Here’s the problem:

Men (primarily redpilled men) believe that women value commitment 100% and sexual attention 0%

So it goes like this:

Men want sex, women want commitment.

The truth is that women also desire sexual attention from men. I want my husband to think that I’m hot and sexy. I want him to lust after me the same way he would lust after a porn star. In other words: I want him to see me as the Madonna and the Whore.

For example: when my husband left his ex for me (she cheated on him), his ex went on and on about how he “downgraded.” She posted on social media about how she was better than me, sexier, hotter…so on and so forth. Mind you, we were all very young so expect the immaturity.

And you know what? People agreed with her. I was conservative and plain and “wife” material, whereas she was hot and kinky and wild. Her Instagram was full of thirst traps. I was humiliated. Men lusted after her. But me? I was invisible.

Even though my husband chose me, even though he committed to me, I still felt inferior to her because she was considered higher on the female sexual hierarchy. She was more of a sexual being than I was. She was the sort of girl men lust after…and I was the sort of girl you marry when you’ve had your fun and you’re ready to settle down.

Because wives and mothers, we aren’t fun, right? We’re not like Belle Delphine or Riley Reid. We can never compare (sexually) to the women you lust after. Reddit is full of women lamenting that their husbands choose porn over them. Reddit is full of wives and mothers who feel insecure because their husbands can’t stop staring at hotter younger porn stars.

You could say “oh well those porn stars will hit the wall and be miserable and lonely” but you know what? None of that matters when you’re a young girl and you want guys to lust after you the same way they’d lust after a porn star.

Men can say all day every day “well I wouldn’t marry a porn star, I want you because you’d be a good wife and mother,” but that doesn’t change the fact that the porn star will always have a monopoly on your lust and sexual attention.

So what motivation do women have to be good wives and mothers? We no longer require commitment from a man for financial security. And getting sexual attention from men is really fun and validating and enjoyable.

To make it perfectly clear: it is men who make it so fun to be slutty. It is men who give women the motivation to be slutty.

Think of when a man cheats on his wife. He might think he’s using his mistress and degrading his mistress, but in reality it’s the mistress who is degrading his wife by stealing her man. The mistress knows it. The wife knows it. All the women watching from the sidelines know it. Only the man, in his delusional mind, thinks that he’s the one using the mistress.

The wife might try to convince herself that she still wins because he’s still committed to her, but all the women in her social circle know she’s lying to herself.

So by having such low sexual standards, men provide infinite sexual power to women.

And women have a choice:

Do I want to be the lonely dumpy housewife whose husband jacks off to porn every night, or do I want to be the hot girl who would make my husband’s eyes fall out of his head? The Madonna-Whore complex dictates that I cannot be both.

Women are starting to choose the latter even if it means losing out on marriage.

Soloandthewookiee · 2023-03-18T19:02:53+00:00

Bad thing because so many dudes use "I'm willing to stick my dick into any woman" as an excuse for how hard men have it in dating, like women should feel lucky that so many guys are desperate enough to fuck them.

When you see a good looking guy hooking up with a rather unattractive woman, or just barely "plain Jane", do you think "hell yeah dude" or "dude, really?", or do you not care?

Why the hell would any rational person care who someone random person is dating, and why are you assuming that just because she's physically unattractive that it means he has ~~no standards~~ very low standards?

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2023-03-18T18:41:20+00:00

Bad thing, if only because I'm tired of the whining. ''Waaah, women are deluded and think they're hot even when (I think) they aren't''. Well, if a bunch of guys weren't going after anything vaguely female-shaped with a pulse we wouldn't have this issue now, would we? Who inflates those egos you keep complaining about? Santa? The Easter Bunny?

JNRoberts42 · 2023-03-18T18:39:46+00:00

I don't care either way, so long as everyone is happy. Get some.

But men use their lack of scruples to indict women for refusing to fuck or date down as if their standards are a moral failing. As if a woman who is cautious is shallow and uncharitable to lonely, horny men.

But women's chances of having orgasm with a stranger are low, even lower if that stranger is repulsive to her. Men are most likely going to enjoy a satisfactory sexual experience, far less likely to get pregnant or physically overpowered or coerced/forced to perform an act they don't want to.

Safinated · 2023-03-18T18:33:28+00:00

I’d say “bad” but only because the “reason” for it (more offspring) isn’t really relevant anymore.

But we should never force anyone to do anything.

Diligent_Divide_4978 · 2023-03-18T19:30:24+00:00

It’s good for women who want the same thing as the men you’re talking about but bad for average men who desire a looksmatched partner.

But it’s inevitable. Men rate the majority of women as average or above while women rate 80% of men as below average. Short of a cataclysmic societal event, I don’t think anything will change this reality.

jmoincali · 2023-03-18T18:42:50+00:00

Honestly, I wish mens sex drives werent so high and we could do without like women can...but there would be a downward death spiral in this world's population if that were the case.

Women would be happier in a lot of things but would find it impossible to maintain a relationship with the men they desire since we'd become much pickier. Sex makes men do very shortsighted things in womens favor

LiftSushiDallas · 2023-03-18T18:43:29+00:00

I have no judgment on it. Every man and woman is responsible for their own sexual marketplace strategy.

MILFBucket · 2023-03-18T19:24:48+00:00

Bad. We should shame men for doing that. It ruins everything down the line for the rest of us.

Deshaun-Kobe · 2023-03-18T18:35:38+00:00

Ok there's two routes you can view this

I see it as just how it is since the male sex drive is just that strong to have low standards when coming to sex

The second is even if men were to increase their standards it won't necessarily make a big change but l will tell you that the dating economy would collapse if the standards were raised even for a little bit

learn2earn89 · 2023-03-18T18:44:30+00:00

I’d say bad and I’m a woman. I’ve had a married Chad try to get my attention (back when I wore a mask so he couldn’t see my full ugliness) but it made me feel like utter crap.

SDW137 · 2023-03-18T19:30:32+00:00

I see it as a bad thing. And for reference, I'm a guy, with high standards.

NockerJoe · 2023-03-18T18:41:44+00:00

The way I see it if men weren't going for it aggressivley there'd be less sex in general, including enjoyable, good sex. The premise that things would improve if men were as selective as women claim to be what would probably mostly happen is everyone is hyper passive and actual mutual attraction would be vanishingly rare so things just wouldn't get off the ground that often.

The premise that being hyper selective is natural and good is implicitly based on the premise that if you do make a selection it'll probably work out, or that you can somehow make things go more or less on your preferred timetable easily.

Though I will say I don't care who individual people are activley fucking. Out in the real world there are plenty of fit and cut chubby chasers and plenty of traditionally attractive people with dating problems and people who have other shit going for them.

wtknight · 2023-03-18T20:53:34+00:00

I don't see really good looking men with unattractive women in long-term relationships. As for sex, they are obviously trying to do things on easy mode if they are hitting on women much less attractive than them.

I think that it's a bad thing when anyone pursues casual sex.

neetykeeno · 2023-03-18T22:46:20+00:00

That men have such low standards is a terrible thing. It is part of the reason men won't just go away when women refuse them. Guys know that enthusiastic sexual participation is better but they are kinda sorta willing to lower their standards on that and go for women who they have to nag or pressure into sex. Terrible, just terrible.

RocinanteCoffee · 2023-03-19T00:07:13+00:00

When you see a good looking guy hooking up with a rather unattractive woman, or just barely "plain Jane", do you think "hell yeah dude" or "dude, really?"

You have no idea what his tastes are.

People even on this subreddit cannot even agree if a famous Hollywood actress is a '4' or a '6' or a '9', even the most pilled of them.

You may think she's a 'Plain Jane' but he could be one of the guys on this subreddit who finds women who don't wear makeup, don't get manicures, don't formally style their hair hotter.

You don't know what their types are. Some people (like me) like fat people and are attracted to them.

You can't glance at a couple and know what their tastes are.

On another note, anyone who would pretend to be attracted to someone they don't find appealing just to get a date is doing something deceptive, unethical and sleazy.

While there are deceptive sleazy people out there, painting most men with this brush is inaccurate and misandrist.

M3taBuster · 2023-03-18T20:56:24+00:00

It's a bad thing that (many) men have two different sets of standards for sex and relationships, because:

- It confuses women, because they by and large only have one set of standards that applies to both sex and relationships. So they don't understand that just because a man finds her attractive enough to fuck, that doesn't necessarily mean he finds her attractive enough to date seriously. So they get "pumped and dumped", hurt, and filled with baggage.

- It causes said women to have an inflated perception of their own attractiveness, which prevents them from pairing up with their looksmatch.

- It also causes them to rack up their n-count, making them less desirable to their looksmatch, and less fit for a LTR.

- It forces the women who do know that men have two sets of standards to be even more cautious and selective, which makes it unnecessarily difficult for men who want LTRs to approach women.

thelittlemermaid99 · 2023-03-18T19:32:40+00:00

I'm just curious, where do these men with very low standards live? What do they do? How do they look like? Where do you meet them? Why are they so desperate to fuck someone they're not attracted to in the age of HD porn, Onlyfans and realistic sex dolls? Cause I've personally never ever met one in real life. I have no doubt they exist, but are there really so many of them? My (mostly average) male friends and relatives would never fuck a woman leagues below them. They follow insta models and they talk shit about unfuckable 'ugly' (perfectly average, just not insta model tier) girls all the time. My average female friends also never had 'chad' fwb-s.

kirasenpai · 2023-03-19T00:44:44+00:00

Yeah i wish men had higher standards… i mean if an avarage woman can get 80% of the guys and an avarage dude only like 20%… it makes it much harder for men… woman’s perspective is kinda skewed in a way that they get way too much attention just for their looks.

As for myself… i would prefer to not care at all

That__EST · 2023-03-18T18:40:20+00:00

When it comes to the continued existence of our human species, I think it's a good thing.

I wonder where we're headed as a species. We've had a long time of trying to be life long monogamous. But I think that were really headed for a future of amiable co parenting.

LupeDyCazari · 2023-03-18T19:56:28+00:00

What low standards for sex?

Unattractive men are the ones who have low standards for sex, and they are the ones who have low standards for sex because they are desperate.

And yes, overweight, plain guys with nothing interesting or appealing to them are unattractive.

I have never seen a good-looking guy hooking-up with an unattractive woman. Rather? Geez, she looks like the elephant man?

I've worked as a waiter in popular restaurants, coffee shops, bartender in popular bars and nightclubs around the world, and I've worked as a host in a host club in Tokyo. I have never seen a good-looking man entertain a woman who was ugly, fat, or unattractive in any way or shape.

Either the men you call attractive are average-looking and you can't tell the difference between a hot dude and an average-looking dude or an ugly dude, or the women are not nearly as unattractive as you claim to be, which means they are hooking-up with men who are in their own league in terms of looks.

I don't give a fuck about what men do.

It's up to men to either accept their league, and no, women in their league are not fucking Chris Hemsworth, or to improve themselves to the point where they can attract the women they want to attract, organically, without having to use money.

Hmmm, I have very high standards in the women I smash, which frankly is one of the reasons why I Haven't been able to clear my lifelong dream.

To fuck a thousand women before I die of very old age, and if I was like these chumps who will fuck jabba the hutt as long as it has a pussy, I'd have gotten a lot closer to my most beautiful of dreams by now, instead of panicking because I'm already in my thirties and I've only taken to bed three hundred women, and I gamed the system a lot by partaking in the lovely services of high-end escorts.

I have really high standards in women, and if I can't pull what I want naturally, I either go home and jerk off thinking about Kim Kardashian, or I hire an escort with that body type.

Sadly for me, ever since I was young, the only ''type'' of woman that is into me, naturally, without me paying cash for it, is the very pretty, very feminine type with a flat ass and small tits and narrow hips.

Eh, it's better than nothing, I guess.

You would ask, ''but bro, how do you have so much time to enjoy yourself like that?!''

I've been a kept man for years now, a house husband. Houses here are tiny so you find yourself with a lot of time to enjoy yourself.

Get yourself a beautiful Japanese woman with low self-esteem and a lack of understanding of how attractive she is and you got it made, brah.

whitehack · 2023-03-19T13:53:59+00:00

Key word here is MOST men's low standards for sex. MINE aren't low (waiting for trolls to come running in... and ready to stand my ground lol).

ragman75 · 2023-03-19T16:36:16+00:00

i dont think they are low at all from what we can see from dating app data, the avg man finds the avg woman avgly attractive, which is sufficient for him to want to have sex.

relish5k · 2023-03-19T19:40:46+00:00

Men have a very low investment in reproduction. It makes sense that they would have lower standards for investing their penis (if not their resources). It’s not necessarily bad as long as they don’t wreak havoc on women’s lives and spread STDs.

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Anxious-Tailor-7182 · 2023-03-18T18:43:25+00:00

Sex is sex. And there's no correlation between how girl looks and how good she's in bed. If your dick likes her then it's good. Worst thing you can find is nice and pretty pillow princess.

warramite · 2023-03-18T19:18:34+00:00

The standards are only an issue because of the mismatch, if both women and men had low or high standards there'd be much less an issue

rodeopete3281 · 2023-03-18T19:41:34+00:00

I find the ease in which someone generalizes an entire gender, as a bad thing.

The rest is irrelevant.

lle-ell · 2023-03-18T19:59:33+00:00

Bad thing, tbh.

cowfishAreReal · 2023-03-18T20:07:12+00:00

Each person's standars is their own business. Have them as high or as low as you want. Just don’t complain when nobody meets your high standards or when other people aren't willing to fuck anything like you

gymbro718nyc2 · 2023-03-18T20:53:15+00:00

Not only is their low standards for sex a bad thing, but generally being so easy about sex is actually the one thing that keeps men from getting laid more. Every woman wants a challenge. It's the reason groupies will line up outside of a rock star's dressing room and be the 15th girl for the night to suck his dick and although he will never ever commit to her, she is excited to do it. It's the reason women go after men who treat them badly and never stick around. They are a challenge. They are hard to get. They make her do actual work.

A guy who basically says "I will have sex wjth anyone who will have me" is actually the least attractive thing you can think of. Of course, men want easy sex. They will never turn down easy sex. So they project this onto women and they think in order to get sex I have to offer easy sex.

Women think the opposite. They want a challenge. They want a guy they can work for. So they project their mating mechanism onto men and act hard to get, saying stuff like "well, if he wants me, he will have to wine and dine me, and do this that and the third".

Both of these strategies work terrible for the sexes.

SoulBadguy0408 · 2023-03-18T20:55:02+00:00

It seems like a problem if men are so horny they're willing to fuck anything but don't have plans to take it any further and don't make that clear up front although if women are cool knowing a guy isn't into you like that and still getting fucked that's on them then at that point

KayRay1994 · 2023-03-18T20:58:47+00:00

depends - if this person is simply someone they’re interested in, then no. If you actively aim for less attractive women just to sleep with them, then yes

harmonica2 · 2023-03-18T21:44:28+00:00

I thought the only reason men have no standards is because the high standard women keep on rejecting them, thereby forcing them to downgrade, if that's not the reason?

Some-Web-1213 · 2023-03-18T21:45:05+00:00

There is no reason why an attractive dude should be able to just hook up with a girl on his level of attractiveness because a woman carries primary responsibility for sexual contact. So it makes perfect sense that he will have to go down the attractiveness pyramid to get an easy lay.

LeatherCarpet6791 · 2023-03-18T21:54:19+00:00

i am a man who find most women attractive and fuckable .

For me its a good thing i can use it to my advantage to be more picky ll put those point on personality and morals

(If im turned on by both i wil move to the other box quicker personality,morals,intelligence etc)

howdoiw0rkthisthing · 2023-03-18T22:36:57+00:00

It’s not good or bad, it simply is. Indifferent AMALT is the redpill women need to take.

Flashy-Country-800 · 2023-03-18T23:29:14+00:00

Good or bad depends on the goal.

Is the goal for men to have sex? Sure, then it’s better for him not to discriminate as it increases the chances of him having sex.

Is the goal to foster a society with monogamous marriages producing children? A lower bar for sex than commitment is probably not a good thing.

peanutsetgomme · 2023-03-19T00:16:42+00:00

He lost value

Podlubnyi · 2023-03-19T01:30:31+00:00

If you as a man describe yourself as having very low standards, do you wish you weren't willing to fuck down so much?

Can't speak for anyone else, but I have a category entitled not even if I was desperate. It's a long list..

Barely-moral · 2023-03-19T02:11:51+00:00

It is a good thing because it makes men believe that having sex with a woman they find attractive enough to have sex with is an achievable goal. All they have to do to get it is to work a little more, improve a little more, be a productive member of society.

Society works and exists because men believe that the actions that make it work increase their chances to have sex with someone they find attractive.

If they were attracted only to women they have no chance to be with then they will not do anything because there wouldn't be enough of a reward.

FrivolousMood · 2023-03-19T02:15:16+00:00

This is the consequence of men having 100 times stronger sex drive than women.

Midaycarehere · 2023-03-19T02:49:23+00:00

I ask every man I date about their sexual experiences. The minute they tell me they dated women only to screw, I need to know why. If the answer isn’t, “I was 16 (or younger) and an asshole” then I pass.

I want a man who values sex, period.

MistyMaisel · 2023-03-19T03:22:31+00:00

Bad. I find it gross honestly. And it has often made it difficult to believe a man is genuinely into me or thinks I'm special or beautiful or sexy. Because those words don't seem to mean very much coming from men. I honestly tend to feel more complimented by women saying I look good than men in like 95% of cases.

blaizken_420 · 2023-03-19T04:34:11+00:00

Very bad.

Miserable-Original · 2023-03-19T04:51:28+00:00

Bad, it reinforces alrighty giga inflated female egos

DisasterPeace7 · 2023-03-19T06:30:47+00:00

Good, if men had the same sexual drive and standards as women that human race would have went extinct a long time ago

StaticNocturne · 2023-03-19T06:43:35+00:00

There's nothing alpha about having a high body count if that's the result of desperation and low standards. It takes more fortitude and integrity to turn down sex and manage your animal impulses.

WilliamWyattD · 2023-03-19T06:58:14+00:00

Men's much more flexible attraction floor is necessary to facilitate more pairings. However, the issue is that men are able to act upon it too easily. Sex seems to lack consequence; when sex required a relationship, men had to balance out the fact that they found many girls attractive with the reality that they would also have to be in a relationship with that woman.

No-Chance-8405 · 2023-03-19T10:33:50+00:00

People will have their reasons why they chose one person over the other, so I don't care.

I personally prefer men with higher standards. It wouldn't be flattering knowing that you are easily replacable by any other woman who is not straight forward ugly.

I also believe that having low standards can easily lead to putting only little effort into the act since it becomes a numbers game and the man will simply move to the next best one if he can't get sex from me immediately.

Finding someone attractive for their uniqueness allows on the other hand to build a connection that makes sex (any anything else for that matter) a much better experience.

Men with low standards are extremely unappealing to me, no matter how good they look.

MotleyCrew1989 · 2023-03-19T11:30:35+00:00

I think it is more of a necesity, if men were as picky as women we wouldnt be arround eight billion people worldwide.

I go "you motherf*cker" for a gorgeous girl, if it is below average I stat to question why he is with her.

Nihi1986 · 2023-03-19T13:24:29+00:00

It's a terrible thing and perhaps the core of many current problems with both dating and relationships, and it affects men and women.

1- The least attractive men and even many 'average' men end up with nothing or terrible quality.

2- Sex is often how a relationship starts, those relationships tend to be incredibly one sided, with the woman enduring all sorts of shit, sometimes abusive, which is not bad just for women, it also give us a bad reputation. A man who knows he's clearly dating down and for sex will treat you decently at best if he's a good person...if he's not, welcome to the relationship where he makes fun of you, complains about your body, you aren't valued, forgets your anniversary, flirts with other girls, cheats...

lallelelu · 2023-03-19T18:37:12+00:00

Bad it’s sad and honestly disgusting

ResponsibleUmpire752 · 2023-03-22T06:54:23+00:00

Who cares who's hooking up if both people are into into it?

Brandy96Ros · 2023-03-23T06:21:20+00:00

Bad thing. Men aren't interested in pleasing the women they perceive as having some major physical flaw (whether it be too chubby, flat boobs, flat ass, weird looking vulva etc) and are therefore only interested in their own orgasm. Because men are more visual than women they tend to be hyper-focused on women's features. Any woman who doesn't meet their personal preference is just for their selfish sexual use.

Sure, I could easily find a man to have sex with tonight, but there's a very low chance it will be a pleasurable experience for me. This is what male incels don't understand. They think that more men wanting to use me as a fleshlight is a privilege. But women want to be desired and appreciated and have good sex, not treated as someone worthy enough for you to stick your dick into for five minutes of foreplay-less jackhammering.

InjectAdrenochrome · 2023-03-29T04:20:32+00:00

I see men with low standards as weird. They're usually not terrible people but idk why they have such low standards

Title	Do you see men's very low standards for sex as a good or bad thing?
Author	brilliant22
Upvotes	16
Comments	180
Date	March 18, 2023 6:23 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/11uvtgk/do_you_see_mens_very_low_standards_for_sex_as_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-you-see-mens-very-low-standards-for-sex-as-a.1180371 https://theredarchive.com/post/1180371

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