Something I’ve noticed time and time again is that typically women really don’t know what they want until it’s actually happening right in front of them (even despite the fact they seem incredibly sure they do). My reasoning is because in almost every discussion topic surrounding relationships, there is always the option for women to turn a positive into a negative based upon feelings as opposed to what is actually occurring.

A Twitter thread I saw outlined a scenario in which this typically occurs:

-husband speaks with wife about lack of intimacy. He is told she is exhausted and needs more help around the house (choreplay). Says this would help her. -husband helps more. No change in intimacy results. -husband speaks to wife frustrated and echos his concerns. -wife proceeds to get angry at her husband because he was only helping to get sex, not just to alleviate her stress and needs.

In the example above, we have a man who clearly made his concerns clear to his wife, she informed him what would be more beneficial, he proceeds to adhere to the terms, she then weaponizes those same terms against him. When I’m reality, he actually was trying to solve both his problem AND hers. Yet she only sees herself as the victim despite getting the assistance she asked for. There are countless other similar examples like this one I’ve seen.

Here’s my point. All of this “open communication” talk is layered over the fact that it has to agree/identify with the woman’s worldview and feelings. Otherwise, it’s likely labeled as selfish, uncaring, manipulative, etc. and the man is actually doing himself a disservice.

Thoughts?

EDIT: the responses seem to indicate that even if a potential solution is offered, it should not be looked at as a potential solution. Which… was the exact point.