How can men be desirable to women under late-stage capitalism?

Dapper-Suggestion462 · 2025-08-22T15:16:29+00:00

They cannot

The internet/capitalism and the easy dopamine online has made both genders optional for each other unless they want to make beautiful babies….

AngeAware · 2025-08-22T13:47:51+00:00

Child poverty rate is over 25% in some U.S. states. Clearly desirable broke men exist for better or worse.

I think that many Redditors who claim that women are universally seeking ambitious and successful men are quite frankly sheltered. They cannot comprehend that poor people who are going to be poor for the rest of their lives, accept that their children are going to be poor, and have no desire to improve their circumstances exist. See The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls.

Lemon_gecko · 2025-08-22T13:53:01+00:00

Okay, i can't answer for most women here. I'm an outlier here, but just putting it here for a chance it might be useful. I'm a childfree and i don't look for provider. Without kids it is possible to go 50/50 or more like to each their own and share what necessary.

My reasons to be with a man simple as he should make my life more pleasant that it is without him. Meaning that i have to enjoy his presence. He has to be interesting (for me), he has to be a safe space for me, someone i can open up to. I'm out if he makes my life harder, meaning if i need to serve him in some way, if he starts to trow a tantrums or manipulating me into changing. If sex is all about him and i "have to" satisfy him. In short a man is not supposed to be a chore to maintain.

So if a man treats me well (i'm not talking about princess treatment, just as a friend), if we can connect, if we're interesting to each other, if sex is good, we share important values and both are adults who not burden each other, i'm all up for it.

mlo9109 · 2025-08-22T13:48:30+00:00

Related to economics? Realizing that life costs what you put into it and not all women are materialistic monsters. I dated a so called male feminist who wanted me to work and earn at least 6 figures to support his lifestyle.

He has a 6 figure union job and lives in a small, fairly LCOL town but spends on dumb shit he doesn't need while crying poverty (new car, gaming system, etc.) We could live fairly comfortably with less spending.

I work remotely but aspire to be a SAHM and am willing to make sacrifices to make that happen (only one car, thrifted clothes, not eating out, etc.) He called me a peasant for aspiring to a simpler life.

I guarantee if the roles were reversed he'd call me a gold digger for expecting him to earn the 6 figure salary while paying for my hair/nail appointments, designer bags, vacations, etc.

attendquoi · 2025-08-22T13:30:47+00:00

I think it's less about being more desirable and more about who you're choosing to pursue. If you can't fill the role of provider, find a woman who earns her own money and doesn't need one.

(This means y'all need to start giving a fuck about what women do for a living and how much they earn)

MoreSanitizerPls · 2025-08-22T13:55:02+00:00

If this were true all the men in the trailer park would be single but a lot of them have multiple baby mamas.

The most desirable women will always have their pick of the litter and more often than not they will pick a man with means. With that being said most men would save themselves a lot of heartbreak if they stopped attempting to chase those women.

Obvious_Smoke3633 · 2025-08-22T14:04:09+00:00

Men can be desirable to women under late-stage capitalism by offering more things of non-monetary value. Such as: emotional intelligence, being physically attractive and hygienic, and true 50/50 partnership, including things like: cleaning, cooking, planning, being romantic. Most of all a lot of men have to stop deluding themselves into thinking that they need to be "better" than their partner. Men love hierarchies and desire to "feel" above women. Understand you're going to be in a partnership, not in charge, not the leader, not the final decision maker. Actually grasp the whole full entire concept of partnership and respect their partner.

Downtown_Cat_1745 · 2025-08-22T14:37:31+00:00

They can be pleasant companions and help towards common goals. Having a partner pulling the rope in the same direction makes life easier. If a guy is just dead weight, it’s better not to have him.

That means if you’re both working the same hours, you should both do chores.

Aimeereddit123 · 2025-08-22T14:16:41+00:00

I love that you are asking this, but I’m cautious, because men will ask, but then argue with our answer 😆. But anyway, it’s true. In the past, women provided the baby, and men provided for the baby and mom. That was their main relationship value. These days, everyone except the damn elite are living wage poor, so fine. If men need help now with rent and bills from women, then they HAVE to bring something else to the table. Over and over and over again, we answer yall men by saying we want higher emotional intelligence from you. The type where you get therapy, learn yourself and others, and how to be an equal team player in our relationship. We want open communication, humor, cheap dates, easily given affection and vulnerability. We want the man involved in the making of ‘couples friends’, and joint help keeping up with them. We want MEN to read and watch relationships books and videos. We want them to emotionally grow and learn how to be emotionally invested. For some reason, this stuff freaks men out, and they argue that it makes them a ‘beta’. It’s absolutely ridiculous. It makes them not divorced, is what it makes them! I’ve said for years that the new currency for men will be emotional intelligence.

Suspicious_Glove7365 · 2025-08-22T16:08:19+00:00

Have. Your. Shit. Together.

Don't be a burden by making me clean up after you, make plans for you, worry about you, etc. I refuse to be with a man who is directionless, lazy, addicted to anything, or doesn't have healthy communication. Have mental health issues but refuse to go to therapy? Bye. Have no money and are not working hard to get more money? Bye. Take responsibility for yourself, be a good person, be supportive of me, don't be a slob, don't be low effort. I do not want to take care of you. I do not want to worry about if you're going to do the thing I asked you to do. I don't want to even ask you to do it. I want you to think of it on your own.

In other words: be an adult.

Avast_Lion · 2025-08-22T16:18:36+00:00

I don’t want a provider, nor do a lot of women I know. I have a low-salary white collar job, and I’ve dated broke guys and rich guys alike. My preference would be for a man who makes about the same as me, but that’s like my preference for a man who is a good dancer or has curly hair—I consider it a bonus, not a requirement.

The thing about evolutionary psychology is that it is, by definition, speculative. We have no way of knowing whether women’s desire for rich men is biological or cultural. Because, in the leftist feminist urban US culture I belong to, wanting a provider is pretty rare, I tend to think it’s the latter. My advice to you would be to look for women in those cultural environs if you can. If you can’t, there’s always learning to dance—I’m not joking, I think men underestimate how much women go nuts for that shit.

Siukslinis_acc · 2025-08-22T16:44:44+00:00

Being a co-op partner whose company i enjoy.

JadeGrapes · 2025-08-23T03:24:29+00:00

The same way urban Black men and Hispanic men have this whole time? It's only the white guys that are like "women with their own money aren't forced to tolerate meeeee!" - their women have been working this whoooole time.

Ever heard the trope of the "Latin lover" or wonder why some black guys wear evening suits instead of jeans to everything? Because If you can't bring the cash, you have to bring the cool.

Make yourself presentable at your top ability, make being romantic into a hobby, hit the gym, get haircuts every 2 weeks, learn to cook, take her dancing so she lights up the whole room, be nurturing, learn massage, befriend her family.

The same way women put a ton of effort into looks & charm & fun (when they bring their A game)... the same way women picked up earning, men are gonna have to pick up fawning over someone.

Women want companionship too, it's kind of bleak for guys to think they can only buy her attention.

AutoModerator · 2025-08-22T13:28:37+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "Debate" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Redhotangelxxx · 2025-08-23T10:19:21+00:00

Depends on the woman obviously

chalkandapples · 2025-08-22T20:42:33+00:00

I'm someone who cared a lot about financial stability and earning potential when dating. I definitely do look for men that has a certain background and economic reality. Because all else equal, having money is often better than not having money. But similarly, as long as the relationship is good and the person is a good person and not taking away from my life, usually having another person around is better than not.

To me, most people are great, and it's better to have them around than not. This applies to men too. Is it better if they also have money that can make both you and your potential children's lives easier? Yes, but if that's not viable then too bad.

Title	How can men be desirable to women under late-stage capitalism?
Author	AresThePacifist_
Upvotes	49
Comments	301
Date	August 22, 2025 1:28 PM UTC (11 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1mx6jhx/how_can_men_be_desirable_to_women_under_latestage/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/how-can-men-be-desirable-to-women-under-late-stage.1560186 https://theredarchive.com/post/1560186

Comments