This is why we can’t even trust the “good” guys.

Nifteroni-and-Cheese · 2021-04-14T01:12:34+00:00

Also a valuable message: bad guys aren’t bad to everyone they know, so trust women when they tell you something alarming about a guy, even if you could never imagine doing something like that.

SolunaJune · 2021-04-14T00:33:08+00:00

Ted Bundy walked his coworker Ann Rule to her car for her safety. Don't trust any of 'em..

emptiness1017 · 2021-04-14T02:07:57+00:00

Trigger Warning **

I once had a sober friend drive me home and we had a great heart to heart. Then he came on to me and I rejected him. He got angry at me rejecting him and forced himself on me. He left and tried to act like nothing happened and when I addressed it he tried so hard to deny it.

My Friend and I were very close friends and had known each other since middle school. When this happened I was about 23. This was someone I considered a great guy. Never let your guard down ... even “Nice Guys” are monsters.

**** I told my then boyfriend now ex-husband what happened and he accused me of cheating. Because I was very much controlled by my ex I never reported anything. I was afraid of how he would feel going through pressing charges and he was already angry with me.

NotSoSmartChick · 2021-04-14T03:19:40+00:00

25 years ago, I was friends with benefits with this really good guy, our situation ended when he met someone he wanted to marry.

A few years later, he was on the front page of our newspaper, he’d shot and killed his wife before killing himself. It was timed so that her teenage daughter found them when she came home from school.

You truly never know.

Mcccy · 2021-04-14T00:07:49+00:00

I don't think I'd be able to trust another guy again if that was me tbh.

When I was working at a bar few years ago the boss next door seemed like a ' good guy'. He was around 50, everyone liked him and he always brought us stuff for free.

One night I saw him beating up two drunk women cause they puked on his car. He pushed their heads on it repeatedly till the neighbors woke up and stopped him. He of course got out the next day cause money and he's still allowed to work with drunk people.

donttextme_k · 2021-04-14T02:00:06+00:00

That’s why my mom never lets me sleep over at anyone’s house as a kid without any women in the house, no matter how well she knows the man

WorkaholicParty · 2021-04-14T03:23:14+00:00

So basically I'm not paranoid, my anxiety isn't irrational - got it.

howdoilogoutt · 2021-04-14T10:40:51+00:00

Girl my family knew let a friend crash at hers for the night, he ended up raping her and killing her. It's terrifying you really can't trust any of them.

505ithy · 2021-04-14T03:51:18+00:00

Omg There was an old coworker me and my friend used to go out to clubs and to play pool with. He deemed super chill especially compared to the super chauvinistic machismo nasties worked with. He just got arrested for beating his baby mama with a hammer and her condition is bad. You don’t know.b

numbers213 · 2021-04-14T01:58:49+00:00

This reminded me of my best friend. She went to college in the mid west. She had a friend that on her 21st birthday was shot down by her dorms. Her friends birthday was like 10 ish days before mine. She called me panicked that on my 21st I'd die too. Her friends boyfriend of 5 years killed her. Why? There was no reason. He just did it. I never met this girl because I live extremely far from the college but I think about her sometimes about the phone call I got from my best friend crying that I can't die too. That she didn't get to even graduate college. Her life is gone because of why? Some guy she was dating thought he could take it? I'm tearing up just writing this.

adeecomeforth · 2021-04-14T04:07:44+00:00

My special needs brother had a therapist who would come to our house for a few hours, we were all fond of him and thought of him as family, really nice guy. He decided to go back to school to continue get his Master's and we didn't hear from him after a while, then I found out he was in jail for killing his own mom.

lillylilacladybug · 2021-04-14T00:04:08+00:00

That is truly frightening. They need to crack down on punishing johns and not just sex workers. I say put them on the sex offender registry minimum tier one lifetime members but that won’t happen.

jargon_explosion · 2021-04-14T01:21:11+00:00

Enough men, with enough victims, who, as she says, are indistinguishable from other men and although we love to think that we can perceive deceit, we are all bad at it as most of us want to believe the best in people.

I'm reading "Predators" by Anna Salter and it is both sobering and terrifying.

elementalvirago · 2021-04-14T02:43:15+00:00

men: "not all men!!!"

women: "still too many men"

me asking FDS: "where are these (non-perpetrating) men?"

SpringJonesOcean · 2021-04-14T01:17:25+00:00

Yikes.

But it makes sense. We never really know a person. And every mass murderer/abuser/batterer/rapist has people in his life that are, "SO SHOCKED."

Apricot_Ibex · 2021-04-14T17:26:08+00:00

Even after men murder women and children, there are pickmes sympathizing with them, asking what "made him snap" and picking apart the victims. If he seemed like a Nice Guy, was quiet and unassuming, the pickmes will say the woman must have been the catalyst for her own death.

Look at the Chris Watts case. Pickmes are sympathizing with this sociopathic meat-suit because he's soft-spoken and his wife was "dominant." He killed his entire family, including two small children! It doesn't fucking matter that he was "polite" or quiet on some Facebook videos!!!

_queeeen_ · 2021-04-14T01:34:33+00:00

Anyone else shrink at the term “sex worker”? It feels like a double insult: the fact that she had to work in conditions of commodified rape, and that this term makes it seem like a sunshiney free choice to be in this line of work.

Honestly I prefer the term “prostitute.” It’s more genuine.

AnonPinkLady · 2021-04-14T03:49:19+00:00

Honestly these days when i hear the whole not all men bullshit I just say "yes all men" because so so many of them are the problem its immeasurable

InnocentlyDistressed · 2021-04-14T03:44:24+00:00

Wow! That’s a scary af thought.

i2aminspired · 2021-04-14T14:08:20+00:00

No such thing as a good or nice guy. They're all just biding their time until they find an opportunity...

looking-for-freedom1 · 2021-04-14T01:07:19+00:00

Wow 😲

CatlovesMoca · 2021-04-14T04:50:51+00:00

A murderer? A MURDERER??? A guy who committed homicide?

.*faints.v

favoritesound · 2021-04-14T02:28:45+00:00

Holy shit.

Yogacat4 · 2021-04-14T01:33:38+00:00

I’m sorry, what? The other woman was part of a vulnerable population. So the guy was really sociable and friendly yes that wouldn’t surprise me.

thowawaywookie · 2021-04-14T04:15:18+00:00

[permanently deleted]

breadandbunny · 2021-04-14T02:55:13+00:00

That is absolutely terrifying. I can't imagine that happening to me. You never really know a person.

Newwavesupport3657 · 2021-04-14T07:54:10+00:00

Holy shit this chilled my blood

3lbsofjewelry · 2021-04-14T02:41:54+00:00

Gotdayum. That took a turn I wasn't expecting.

laylamiller · 2021-04-14T03:47:13+00:00

Well damn.

2021-04-14T17:19:47+00:00

Great. Now we all get to lower the bar for “a good man” to “has he ever murdered anyone female” ... and feel super grateful to him for being “one of the good guys” if he can slither over it.

Previous-Focus-2013 · 2021-04-14T13:40:08+00:00

Madonna/ whore syndrome showing

She was lucky he didn’t realize coworker is also “ female human that can have sex”or she would end up in a ditch too

imalreadydead123 · 2021-04-14T09:07:01+00:00

I would replace " some" by " many"

yoursultana · 2021-04-14T01:26:00+00:00

[permanently deleted]

pleaseunplugheater · 2021-04-14T14:49:13+00:00

New member here. I’m officially fucking chilled to my core. A point I’d like to share: My daughter goes to a family-owned nursery school run by a man, his wife and daughter. Although the community upholds the facility in high regard, (been in business for over 30 years) I always had a odd feeling about him changing the children who have occasional potty accidents. My spouse thinks I’m being weird by having reservations about my observation. Of course he sides with the man...they all have skewed logic and primal brains incapable of the depth of understanding and instinct a woman possesses. I thank FDS for putting words to my innermost emotions and thoughts.

Title	This is why we can’t even trust the “good” guys.
Author	elementalvirago
Upvotes	9577
Comments	147
Date	April 13, 2021 11:44 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/mqejpl/this_is_why_we_cant_even_trust_the_good_guys/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/this-is-why-we-cant-even-trust-the-good-guys.1188465 https://theredarchive.com/post/1188465

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