Men: why do you think we don't ever get rejected by you?

Mrs_Drgree · 2021-04-19T13:37:36+00:00

No leading questions

Laytheblameonluck · 2021-04-19T07:25:33+00:00

RPers aren't upset that women don't initiate first contact. Normal guys are.

The thing is, players work on their game and skills on how to pick up women and use them for sex, whereas the average frustrated chump does not.

That's how players get high n-counts.

I posted a question asking why women don't initiate more to stop this cycle, and they reckon that if they initiate contact a guy will use them for sex, because he's not going to be 100% into her.

¯\(ツ)/¯

-Ivar-TheBoneless · 2021-04-19T11:20:34+00:00

Well the few times I rejected girls it was for a very good reason. For example the girls that only want me after they became single moms, or the chicks that wouldn't give me the time of day before I had money but all of a sudden like me now.

bowserfire73 · 2021-04-19T12:11:47+00:00

The average guy isn't going to reject a girl unless he's already in a relationship. You're only talking about top tier men.

passepar2t · 2021-04-19T08:08:57+00:00

I can guarantee that you don't get rejected as much as we do.

mxp68 · 2021-04-19T08:11:26+00:00

I’ll suggest two possible reasons:

The guy is attractive and he has a lot of other interest so he doesn’t want to start a monogamous relationship. This is the most common reason.
Or, the guy is only average looking, so he is rarely if ever approached or propositioned by women. So when it happens, he is suspicious of it.

I have had the second happen to me. A woman flirted with me hard enough that I started to wonder what was wrong with her, or if she had other motives I couldn’t figure out at the time. Is she about to steal from me? Take my wallet?

“Chads“ are used to women flirting, but I don’t think most average looking men are accustomed to women bold enough to make the first move on them.

kipndip · 2021-04-19T10:49:15+00:00

I’ve seen plenty of really cool, attractive girls get left for no reason. Or they leave because they find out the dude is a psycho(pretty common IMO) I’ve been living with two girls the past couple months and I’ve seen it all. Funniest yet is when they give the “decent” guys a chance and the minute they start getting laid they turn into egotistical pricks with high standards, just to come crawling back. Don’t get me wrong, I’m as shallow as they come but I’ve definitely seen a different perspective this last couple months.

thro_away_2021 · 2021-04-19T09:31:17+00:00

Honestly, reading your post I thought you had a point.

Then I read your other posts in your profile, and it’s like... overtly obvious you hate men and carry some serious baggage surrounding them.

I can guarantee, the crimson flags you carry around is why you’re getting rejected, not your looks. You’re objectively really pretty.

But holy crap if you said half the shit to me I saw on your r/femaledatingstrategy posts, I would rather coat my dick in honey and thrust it into an anthill then spend time with you.

And whether or not you mention these things with the men you approach, you carry around the attitude of these. Men aren’t as emotionally obtuse as you claimed in one of your posts. We can actually pick up on a lot, especially from body language.

I suggest some introspection and self reflection.

maybeathrowaway85 · 2021-04-19T07:45:45+00:00

Because men's standards for women are basically non-existant. Most men do not have the luxury to reject someone who approaches them (and you know, they probably won't get approached at all unless they meet SOME standards of women to a certain degree)

MisterShogunate · 2021-04-19T10:26:56+00:00

Easiest solution is to just go out and meet people in real life. Most of these weird people are online and primarily look for partners online because they are too afraid to go out into the real world since the real world is not friendly to alternate realities and delusions.

It also test your personal delusions. You think you are attractive? Go out and meet people where you can't pick out the best angle for your photos or carefully construct your posts. I've met tried to meet women online and they all have something wrong with them tbh.

ChibsFilipTelfordd · 2021-04-19T09:37:07+00:00

Thanks for telling everyone to look at your profile. I found a previous post of yours. I feel very sorry for you that you think of men this way. I respect women and love women, i can't imagine hating women the way you despise men.

To others too lazy to take a look; some quotes:

Second of all, maybe if they didnt perve on, assault and murder every woman that was this trusting and defenselessly kind to them, we wouldnt be so reluctant

And

Because theyre over dramatic, violent, self obsessed creatures that literally think dominating and fucking women is the meaning of life.

And

men's ideals of being noncommittal shitheads that objectify women and just want to fuck us

But i truly feel sorry for you. Being mentally ill to begin with snd then eating a heroic dose of cannabis edibles while in the midst of a mental breakdown may have caused permanent damage. I suggest stepping away from dating altogether until you get your mental issues sorted.

PlayfulLawyer · 2021-04-19T08:17:24+00:00

Well women do get rejected, just not at the same clip because they don't do most of the approaching and most single guys aren't going to reject an attractive woman coming after them, as far as what you said specifically I highly doubt that you get turned down a lot for your looks before you even get a chance to truly talk to somebody, your attitude might be a turn-off I don't know, but that aside women do get rejected for sure but nowhere near at the same rate

Andress1 · 2021-04-19T09:49:32+00:00

I'm a man and I rejected many women...and they weren't ugly. I only like cute girls, and they were never interested in me, because they were out of my league. My league is average girls. Or it was like that before corona.

During corona I got an amazing job and kickstarted my career, and got into good physical shape (many people told me i'm very fit) and became more attractive. But i'm not meeting many women currently to see if anything's changed.

So I don't want women approaching me. I want the women I really like to do it. But that's totally unrealistic.

grahamcookiefart · 2021-04-19T08:17:38+00:00

RPers say women are never rejected, yet boast about how they reject women.

Sad_Top1743 · 2021-04-19T07:20:43+00:00

you might get rejected because you seem alt (pink hair) and that can be weird.

But most women have a false sense of perception since their SMV is inflated. The average guy is objectively above average if he's 6 ft has a good job etc.

decoy88 · 2021-04-19T09:11:35+00:00

Men: why do you think we don't ever get rejected by you?

Because the vast majority never actually initiate with men. And I don't mean "initiate contact" or strike up a conversation, that's small fry. I mean making actual, solid undeniable moves to express interest and risk direct rejection - asking for a number/asking out to a date.

Sure women can get rejected down the line and often do, but men here are usually discussing the initial approach...

Women are afraid to pursue guys they like for the exact same reason you are. Rejection hurts. It's exhausting.

holy shit! this is the first time I've seen a woman directly admit this on here. You're absolutely right.

Most of us have tried pursuing men and have been kicked to the curb hard enough to grow cautious.

oohh there it goes, I was about to give props for being upfront about the core reason - rejection tings and can feel scary, and women rather someone else that's not them risk that stinging and scary thing.

Women in general that tried to approach and failed did not get "kicked to the curb hard enough" lol. they experienced normal rejection, often only trying 1-3 times max in their lifetimes ever. Let's be real now.

Women being more romantic and asking out every guy they see would not solve all our problems because, not every guy is desperate to get with just any girl, and plenty would reject us.

Women being more romantic and asking out every guy they are interested in only helps to serve women, as it enables them to go for what they really want and reach satisfaction when that pursuit is successful. Every woman that shakes off the gender status quo around this reports better outcomes.

bilged · 2021-04-19T13:05:30+00:00

I get rejected, a lot. A. Lot.

OK

And no, I'm not psychotic either.

I'll take your word for it.

You can browse my profile if you must, I'm a perfectly normal attractive woman.

Well if you're not psychotic, you sure are wearing a psycho's uniform.

IntelligenceLtd · 2021-04-19T10:41:46+00:00

I reject women all the time lol

2021-04-19T13:16:32+00:00

If you’re addressing the question to men generally and not just redpillers:

It seems you’re constructing a bit of a strawman here. I don’t really see anyone out there proposing that women should ask out as many men as possible a la the “cold approaches” that shy men and pickup-minded guys are encouraged to do (matter of fact, cold approaching is without a doubt the quickest way to maximize rejection if anything). If people are proposing this, then it seems particularly tone deaf.

It’s not that women asking men out would solve all the problems in dating, but it would at least alleviate for quite a bit of the flightiness, mixed signals, head games, and missed opportunities that come with “the chase.” Men receive a lot of mixed and even incorrect messages for how we ought to approach women, it would at least help establish effective communication.

Furthermore, there’s an argument that women taking more agency here would help out with the vetting process on their end. If she’s taking a more active role in selecting partners rather than waiting around to see who approaches, she can figure out what she likes/dislikes more effectively.

As for rejection, well, no pain no gain. It happens, not everyone is going to like you. I think it’d be quite humbling, as a lot of women seem to inflate their egos and think of themselves as more of a priority than they ought to right out of the gate based on solely being approached rather than getting into the fray and risking their ego for once.

masterdarthrevan · 2021-04-19T16:11:36+00:00

I don't think you will ever know the amount of rejection men in general feel. The amount of times you get rejected will likely represent the inverse , likely you succeed 80% of the time and fail only 20% of the time ( which is avg for women) whereas men fail 80% and succeed only 20% . I appreciate that you think you can empathize with us but you Seem to underestimate the extent of how many failures we must endure.

Lokipoki29 · 2021-04-19T10:54:18+00:00

Women’s idea of average is 6 ft , 6in, 6 figures + some criteria on face also there was literally a post on fds stating that

Jakeybaby125 · 2021-04-19T07:54:22+00:00

Because most men have very low standards for who they would consider dating. From what I've seen on Reddit, even being a girl is optional. Me personally, however, I have a few standards that a few might not live up to. Men are also hardwired to reproduce with as many women as possible to keep their legacy going. While this doesn't mean that all men just want sex and will always say yes to it, it means that men are more likely to accept a woman asking them out so they can spread their seed. Hope I'm making sense

ItsOK_IgotU · 2021-04-19T12:17:30+00:00

I think it’s funny that men here think:

“If you were into causal sex, you wouldn’t be rejected”, while also saying “standards too high” and “shooting out of your league”....

Women are rejected plenty, and reject plenty. Men are rejected plenty, and reject plenty (BUT are more willing to simply have sex with someone “below their standards”, because “they aren’t relationship material”).

I’ve been rejected by both men and women who were not “out of my league”, it all comes down to preference. I have also rejected men and women who I was not interested in because A) they wanted sex only, while I do not participate in “hook up culture” and B) their personalities weren’t something I was fond of.

What the men here mean, when they say “if women would approach more.... blah blah blah our loneliness would be less” what they mean is, “women should be more open to no strings attached sex because that is what we want”.

They can’t seem to understand that majority of women are not interested in “no strings attached” sex... if they, if we, were... then we wouldn’t have a vetting process to protect our mentalities, or prevent spread of STIs or unwanted pregnancy...

Dudes will never “understand” because they have the option to just leave whenever they feel like, and we get stuck dealing with the repercussions of our actions (sex). Dude can get an STI sure, but until they understand what goes into pregnancy, carrying to term, or termination... they will never be able to understand why most women are not looking to sleep around with any and everyone (like so many of the men here claim they (men) are).

They can tell us we do not face rejection, or say “it’s not like when we face rejection and get laughed at and belittled” because they are men, and they do not see what it is we go through.

Men here would be HAPPY if a woman just used them for sex, you read it all the time in this sub, and in various other subs across reddit. You hear it from your friends and family too. They just will not get it.

To think that a man would be happy with a group of women they aren’t interested in shouting from across the street “hey baby, let me suck your dick”, or being approached after dark while they’re walking to their car, or backed into a corner at a bar/club... just because the women doing this only want sex from them.

If roles were reversed, they’d bitch about how nasty women are (oh wait, they already do...) and they wouldn’t be into it, but they just cannot see it that way because it very rarely ever happens to them.

Edit: You guys can downvote me all you want because you know I’m not bullshitting. That’s fine. But seriously. Think about it.

If a group of below average women came at you with sexually explicit dialog, you wouldn’t be into it as much as you claim you would be... that’s just a fact.

The only way dudes would be into it, is if the women doing such were of above average attractiveness. So.... 🤷‍♀️

AnonPinkLady · 2021-04-19T07:23:57+00:00

I want to add that rejection is more complicated than "am I attracted to you" etc.

Just because most guys wouldnt turn down the opportunity to sleep with a woman doesnt mean those same men wouldnt reject her when she suggests wanting a romantic relationship with them.

Guys want to bang me all the time but when they realize I'm actually looking for something special and romantic, they want nothing to do with me 90% of the time or play the "let's see where this goes" game. It hurts just as much.

Also I've had a complicated crush on a guy for the last year. Who is single, and we got along great. He doesn't like me back. It happens. All the time

geyejoe7 · 2021-04-19T11:06:47+00:00

Most women that get rejected are rejected by guys in relationships or by Chads.

Chasing men that are already taken or too hot for you doesn't entitle you to say "wow I've been rejected so much".

Most women, overwhelming majority,. won't ever know how it is to be rejected by so many women. Women that are single, and sometimes even below your looksmatch.

It's overwhelming the amount of rejection men get compared to women.

kor8der · 2021-04-19T08:41:34+00:00

Of course women get rejected, it's just less likely than it is for men. Lots of men have things like a preferred type, or an existing romantic partner.

SteveSan82 · 2021-04-19T11:12:19+00:00

RP doesn't care. You are thinking of the blue pill

Platinirism · 2021-04-19T08:30:03+00:00

When we say men’s standards are low, we mean most men are happy with a generic kind average women.

Your profile suggests your an alt girl with pink hair and bi-polar disorder, I wouldn’t call you a normal woman personally.

These three things alone will turn off a lot of men, which is good for you as it means it’s easier to find a guy you’ll be happier with in the long term, but it does mean you’ll be getting rejected more than usual.

Ok_Razzmatazz_1751 · 2021-04-19T08:42:08+00:00

What men want a good woman chasing them technically , isn't that confusion ? Doesn't that come off aggressive to some guys ? Idk 😐 seems kinda confusing what men actually want these days if going by what this poster stated.

2021-04-19T11:04:09+00:00

Nobody is "begging" you to do that, especially any RP men.Women not approaching is advantageous.
Women should get rejected much much more.It would be quite great If women experienced the pain of rejection more. I see no downsides in women "getting hurt","getting exhausted" and "getting kicked to the curb" because they sure don't care when that happens to men.

_lemazaki · 2021-04-19T11:08:07+00:00

Men Rejection = 70% or more
Women Rejection = 30% or less

=/

couldbemage · 2021-04-19T09:58:23+00:00

So I actually looked, like you suggested. You're solid in the category I'd describe as being made entirely of red flags. Unlikely to find an ltr unless you're nonmonogamous or the dude just plain sucks. You sound fun, but in a roller coaster sort of way.

old_wise_man_ · 2021-04-19T09:49:45+00:00

Yep. It’s weird but a lot of men won’t accept a girl asking them out. Where I live since the man is the one who should ask, a lot of guys reject girls because “they didn’t follow the procedure “. Whatever . You do you.

Happyhguru · 2021-04-19T09:27:02+00:00

Because most of the men in this subreddit are highly undesirable and never in the position to reject a woman, even an aging woman such as yourself

NoneOfYourBusinessPS · 2021-04-19T07:23:20+00:00

It's simple. Men think women owe them something, somehow. Centuries of brainwashing has put this in their heads as something "normal". They think women owe them time, compliments, affection, sex, smiles, etc. When women start waking up and realising that they don't owe men SHIT, men's brain can't handle the switch to their reality and they start getting angry and aggressive, as is their usual tactic - if you have no brains/arguments/intellect, all you have is aggression and intimidation. So, yeah. There's your reason. ;)

Shadowgirl7 · 2021-04-19T09:19:28+00:00

For centuries men could do whatever they wanted and they were protected by society. All they had to do was pay a dow to the father of a girl and they'd get a wife to take care of the house and have their babies. He could treat her like shit and could go around fuck other women, the woman could not leave him because her family would not accept her and would just say it's part of being a good wife. A guy could be the biggest piece of shit on earth and he still would have a wife.

Atfer centuries of privilege in which they could do whatever they wanted, could be shitty but they still had a partner, they are now loosing it. So they are upset. Sort of like when you take a toy from a kid and he throws a tantrum because he wants his toy back.

Pilling_it · 2021-04-19T09:22:28+00:00

I do think and know women get rejected by men.

Well fucking duh.

Mocha-Beans · 2021-04-19T10:13:24+00:00

Males aren't asking for normal women to approach, they only want hot women to approach them.

You have to understand, when males say "women" they only mean the attractive ones. Unless they're bitching about over weight women.

AnonPinkLady · 2021-04-19T08:15:14+00:00

I think you're right. These days a lot of men will avoid women with mental illnesses like being borderline because that is often tied to extreme cheating or other highly undeseriable things. However that's for something serious. I don't think men avoid such women just for sex.

A rising amount of women are afflicted with mental illnesses like that. I think the idea that men don't reject is old thinking that maybe was valid way back and only true insofar that back then the possible ills of relationships wasn't something men were aware of because it was shushed down or otherwise just not something we would talk loudly about. So back then these women would overall probably be happier as they got taken care of, but cause a lot of problems. Like argue with the husband one time and then the milkman, postman, fireman and etc. would be offered a good time while the husband was at work.

ComplexProjection · 2021-04-19T08:57:58+00:00

A lot of RPers are upset that women arent more romantic and affectionate towards men, and imply that we should hug, flirt with and ask out random guys as much as we can to give them a chance or whatever.

RPers are not upset about women not initiating, BPers are. They are not upset because they know women initiate most of the time. You can find that in any game manual, where it says to look for IOIs. Those IOIs are initiation.

NICHIJOU2411 · 2021-04-19T09:13:51+00:00

How many women are rejected vs men ? Which gender asks out the other more? IMO its more women tend to not face as many rejections as men do. I’m also sure that y’all would have a easier time finding at least something than men do.

abaxeron · 2021-04-19T09:43:47+00:00

why do you think we don't ever get rejected by you?

Because I have never rejected a woman who openly expressed her sympathy.

(not that it should matter when plenty of you admit you arent appealing).

It does matter because even an ugly guy still has 10 fingers, a tongue, and possibly a couple sex toys. Since so many women are simply physically weak to the point they can't "do the work" in bed (say, orgasm in cowgirl position, because fatigue interferes with pleasure) and just lie there and expect to be satisfied, their appearance is the only thing that actually keeps the process fueled and greased.

Rejection hurts. It's exhausting.

"Therefore, only men should experience it"

Most of us have tried pursuing men

https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/dgc3kr/q4w_englighten_us_on_your_confession_of_feelings/

None of the respondents in this thread said they confessed their feelings to a man definitely more than 4 times. For most, it's 1 or 2. We're having women in their 40s and 50s here, with N-counts of dozens sometimes, and turns out none of them actually tried to pursue a man harder than barely minimal effort.

BROWN-TOILET-PAPER · 2021-04-19T10:42:18+00:00

Men: why do you think we don't ever get rejected by you?

I definitely don't think this. I've rejected way more women than I've ever been with. I don't like women asking me out. At all. Throw me some signals, but don't ask me out. And recognize my disinterest. The only women that pursue harder aren't attractive enough for me, in my personal experience.

A lot of the guys here probably saying all this get little to no action in the first place. And those are guys you don't give a shit about. So you're complaining to the wrong guys.

I've always said women should not ask out men. Men are more likely to lazily say yes to women they are not attracted to for easy pussy. That's what women don't get about men. A lot of men may never bother to pursue easy pussy, out of guilt, but might say yes to it without even thinking about it. With no feeling to it.

Tradition is tradition for a reason. Stop trying to not be women, stop trying to act like men. And don't listen to these betas that are gonna come in with their story about how their wife asked them out.

lestratege · 2021-04-19T11:10:33+00:00

I get rejected, a lot. A. Lot.

Please quantify. How many times has this happened to you in your teens? In your twenties? In your thirties?

poopiedoodie710 · 2021-04-19T11:16:37+00:00

It’s not that we don’t think women get rejected, it’s that we know women don’t usually initiate and thus don’t have to risk being rejected; women often take a more passive approach to dating and count a man not approaching them as “rejection”. Men also don’t expect you to “hug, flirt with and ask out random guys” to give us “a chance”, but for all the sex positivity and independence pushed by women, they still don’t initiate or put much effort into courting - that’s what we actually want, rather than this one-sided expectation of: “prove yourself to me and maybe I’ll pick you over the other guys I’m talking to.”

I think maybe you need to reflect on your own attitudes towards men given your posts - you paint men in broad strokes by saying we “terrorize women” and thus you have a right to be afraid of us and avoid us yet you’re on here complaining you can’t get a quality partner.

And if FDS is sooooo great, how come it isn’t working for you? Do you really think men want to be with someone who holds those attitudes about us, or uses manipulative tactics to get what they want? And isn’t one of FDS’s credos that they don’t approach men? The women on that sub tend relentlessly shame other women who approach men and call them “pickmeishas”, etc

CERTAINLYnotsoup · 2021-04-19T11:36:45+00:00

while I do agree with some of the guys on here who say most women aren't initiating nearly as often, which is def true,

the problem comes when you guys take this and assume that dating is incredibly easy for women in general when in reality you're thinking of like the top 20%. It's really just not helpful to view things this way, and inaccurate.

I suppose all in all, it makes sense to say women have it "easier" since biologically we have higher standards, but it's certainly not something to be directly bitter about towards real women, who probably don't experience this to the degree you think.

Anyway maybe you will listen to me, a girl who's not on /FDS, when I say we both are right in some ways, but some of you guys are being bitter and generalizing way more than reality calls for.

You want to have a better love life? Well, same as any of us, you need to stop griping and work to improve yourself.

(and fyi, the girls with the highest standards tend to go for guys with high standards as well, so you're probably shooting out of your league, which is a universal problem)

Lokipoki29 · 2021-04-19T11:43:14+00:00

Went through you profile to see if you were as pretty as you claimed , Nope you are at best average the only reason people might tell you that is because you are white and have tons of makeup on not to mention that coloured hair is awful There is clearly some chubbiness on your face, plus face is only one part of the argument maybe your body is ugly ?( it matters more than face anyway)

Don’t get me wrong you are still out of my league but then that’s not a compliment as almost every woman is

Now that we have established that you are not a “ perfectly normal attractive woman” maybe you are shooting too high ? , you can’t expect Chad to commit to you if you are only average . You can still fuck him though

Paranoidexboyfriend · 2021-04-19T11:43:53+00:00

No one here is a Sith lord. There are no absolutes, obviously. Everyone in here is talking about general trends. Do women get rejected sometimes? of course they do. Is it anywhere as often as most men do? of course not.
If I said "men are taller than women" would you come in here with "nuh uh some women are 6'0 while there are men that are 5'2!" well no duh. We are talking about trends here. We are talking about generally predictive characteristics of society, not immutable laws of nature.

SherdyRavers · 2021-04-19T12:22:46+00:00

I agree not all men are desperate. Maybe the men you’re approaching don’t like girls who do cosplay and have pink hair.

PoliticsIsBroken · 2021-04-19T12:33:55+00:00

If a woman is rejected, it's usually because the guy is taken or is out of her league. I've never, literally never, seen a woman ask out a guy less attractive than her. Guys get rejected by people in their league all the time.

D4sthian · 2021-04-19T07:37:32+00:00

We all get rejected from time to time. I think men who think that are only going for the top 10% of women. Ofc those won’t be rejected as much (and if they are, they’ll make sure you won’t see it and won’t know about it), and they forget there are average women out there that are NORMAL PEOPLE WHO WANT NORMAL LIVES ffs.

Kemence97 · 2021-04-19T10:03:52+00:00

Because men like this aren't using logic. They are frustrated, and they project it on women.

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Inner_Egg8160 · 2021-04-19T09:11:05+00:00

What are the actual circumstances of these rejections? Like how are you going about asking these guys out? Are they strangers?

I only ask because when I was a young and self-conscious virgin I occassionally had women come onto me and I was attracted to them and willing to date, but I figured they'd somehow gotten the wrong impression of me and if I'd agreed I'd be found out and they'd be dissappointed. I also rejected women I was more comfortable with without realising I'd rejected them like one said to me, tbf after giving loads of signals I was oblivious to, that "we'd make a great bf/gf" and it flew over my head and I essentially rejected her.

Edit: Also, funnily enough, I assumed at the time that some of those women just wanted to hook up which isn't really my scene.

mandathor · 2021-04-19T09:57:58+00:00

I would think that long term stuff a girl will get rejected more often than with short term. Short term, girls don't have a problem. Long term they will they will, probably because they guy is already in the act of pursuing another girl and he almost got the girl, they are in a relationship, the guy makes all the considerations on how it will be living with this person, or they are out of your league. I would think that girls tend to aim too far above their league, even if the guy seems average.

Rejection in high school isn't that representative of your sexual value, here guys/girl will sometimes reject guys/girls they wouldn't otherwise reject due to some silly mind games in their social circle "duuh, your having sex with that weirdo?".

parahacker · 2021-04-19T10:09:35+00:00

Agreed.

But I think the disconnect here is scale. What you're describing, it's not a man thing or a woman thing. It's a sales thing.

Americans especially, we have an instinctive aversion to being sold on something. Every waking moment, men and women both are constantly filtering out messages trying to trick us, get us to buy in, to act, to pay, to 'learn more by clicking here', to drive off on exit 47 for gas and a burger, to call 800-SHADY-LAWYER if we've been in a car accident.

And then we try to talk to each other. And... ask someone out. Or be asked out.

The scale, though - it's different for men and women. At the very least, there's this cultural belief that women can get interest without trying, that they'll walk down the street and men will try their luck, etc.

It ain't so, really. Not to that degree. For some it is, but far from a universal female experience. But it's what we all think is. And that affects things.

What men do know is that it doesn't happen to them (except it does, I've been catcalled by women on multiple occasions). Better to say though that it really doesn't happen to most men that often.

Most men don't get opened by a woman more than, say, once or twice a year at best. Unless they go to the right parties.

Women... it's a bit more than that. Average women - it may be safe to say, 5-6 times a year at least.

So the difference isn't night and day, but it exists. Add in that those averages are chopped up, and you get women on the one hand who are like you and wonder what all the fuss is about, and women on the other who are not even all that more attractive but walk down the barrio and get holla'd the whole time (but what's not said is it's mostly 'cause all the people there know that woman) etc.

It's a mess. There's truth to what you're saying, but there's truth to what men are saying too. Just gotta keep level and approach every situation like it's a new one.

Teflon08191 · 2021-04-19T11:29:18+00:00

Why do you keep begging us to pursue you all like crazy, as if we wouldnt get hurt just as much as you do.

Maybe as a good faith gesture that women are willing to finally acknowledge that "equality" isn't a buffet where you take what you like and leave what you don't?

They aren't, of course. Which is presumably how you managed to type all of that without stopping and thinking "hold on, am I being hypocritical here...?"

wateroclock · 2021-04-19T11:38:34+00:00

I don’t believe a word an unironic FDS poster says. You’re misandrist.

Mustbeaight · 2021-04-19T11:40:40+00:00

Lol who are the men getting approached.. I’m pretty sure what you consider average is well above average.. I’ve never heard of an actual average guy get approached.. it’s mostly the most attractive guys that get approached by women.. and Ofcourse you will get rejected by a few because they could be simply out of your league.. is this what guys call Apex fallacy?

4derp · 2021-04-19T11:47:50+00:00

Actually, I just want you to stop moaning about being hit on. A guy has to try his luck. You could take each attempt as flattery instead of moaning about how guys only want one thing and it's disgusting. That'd be neat.

I didn't understand the fuss until I got older and was being pursued by the type of women I wouldn't want to date. I still wouldn't moan about being hit on, even though some take rejection real ugly like. I'm just flattered that after I've established myself and after women have had 4 kids to 3 different guys that they would want me to fill the void in their wallet.

Have respect for the game and your value in it. When your value is gone, you will miss it. This is something your cool wine aunt would have told you if she wasn't a rabid cat collecting feminist. Maybe you can hand this knowledge onto the next generation.

colgateexpert · 2021-04-19T11:52:42+00:00

You do but for every one guy that rejects you there's 10 guys asking you out

Extremely__Moderate · 2021-04-19T12:07:26+00:00

I was thinking back on it.. most of the women I have rejected over the years were because they were doing something immoral or going to get me thrown in jail.

Some examples:

Was couch surfing in my youth, and the lady of the house wanted to perform oral on me.. she was persistent, but I rejected her over and over. I was not going to disrespect her husband who was so nice as to let me live in his house.

16 Year old girl in Florida when I was 21 did just about anything in her power to get with me, I refused.. I don’t fuck kids

Single mom in Florida wanted to get with me (she actually sexually assaulted me, snuck into my bed and performed oral on me, once I woke up fully, I bitched her out) I rejected her because she was known to have HPV.

I could probably think of some other times, but those came to mind first.

ElleDreamface · 2021-04-19T12:10:54+00:00

Plus men say they want women pursuing them, the reality is not being the 'chaser' will eventually turn them off entirely.

Flightlessbirbz · 2021-04-19T12:16:56+00:00

Even worse, they’ll string you along as a placeholder while they’re waiting for their dream girl to come around. I’d rather get a straight up rejection if someone isn’t interested.

Det_Steve_Sloan · 2021-04-19T12:32:03+00:00

A lot of RPers are upset that women arent more romantic and affectionate towards men, and imply that we should hug, flirt with and ask out random guys as much as we can to give them a chance or whatever.

I mean, you just made this up. RP'ers don't say this. At all.

Naus1987 · 2021-04-19T12:39:56+00:00

Everyone hates rejection, but I’d rather take a shot and miss than never take a shot.

I couldn’t fathom sitting back, and praying someone cool made the first move. The sheer lack of control terrifies me.

It’s ironic. People have often said I was brave for being so bold, but the truth is that I’m absolutely terrified of not trying and having regrets. I’ve done a lot of stupid shit in my life, but I’ll never hit the grave regretting not trying something I wanted or asking a woman out I was interested in.

Some people live their whole lives wondering “what if,” and I can barely make it through a day without finding out.

I’m not brave. I’m horrified of apathy. It scares the hell out of me!!

4everrekt · 2021-04-19T12:50:12+00:00

I don’t think it’s RP specific to think women live life on ez mode when it comes to dating. That’s more of a complaint of an average guy who has no game, wanting someone else to do the difficult work for him.

It’s very difficult to imagine someone turning down an opportunity for something they were actively looking for though, so I think there is info missing from your post.

xFallacyx69 · 2021-04-19T12:54:30+00:00

You don’t get rejected nearly as often.

But it is hilarious to see you guys claim that fear of rejection keeps you from approaching, but you want equality? No you don’t lol

TheBookOfSeil · 2021-04-19T13:23:21+00:00

Can't get rejected if you never approach or ask anyone out, right? That's the main reason why.

Jakes1967 · 2021-04-19T13:27:12+00:00

A lot of RPers are upset that women arent more romantic and affectionate towards men..

Yeah NOT, most men don't give a shit.

We get rejected sometimes. seriously.

I've rejected more than my share of female advances, primarily as I was in a relationship etc.

Why do you keep begging us to pursue you all like crazy...

We don't and nobody really cares

Women being more romantic and asking out every guy they see would not solve all our problems...

This reeks of desperation

EdwardCircumcizehand · 2021-04-19T13:33:48+00:00

Because you come from Femaledatingstrategy. Men from sea to shining sea can see so many god damned red flags from the way you act that you will never find a decent man, they all run the opposite direction

Your sub is so fucking toxic that they have a private Discord called TheDarkTriad and encourage girls to express those same traits, which are the three traits associated with Psychopathy/Sociopathy.

Your sub is for misandrist femcels that’s so shit even Vice did an expose on it: https://www.vice.com/en/article/akdm4a/female-dating-strategy-relationship-advice

You call men scrotes, you don’t talk to any man who isn’t “666” (6ft+, 6 figure income, 6in+ dick) and you probably act entitled to men and their attention while offering nothing yourself except an ok face and a lifetime of misery

If you cut your misandrist bullshit and act like a somewhat normal human being, you probably would get more dates. Instead of using your face and age as the only selling points, have something of value like a personality not built on hating men

Rockbottom503 · 2021-04-19T13:47:01+00:00

You have to approach people to risk rejection. The experience of 'men' collectively is that women do not approach them as a general rule, they have to do that. There are always going to be exceptions to that rule - especially where women are only interested in men more attractive than they are.

NoneOfYourBusinessPS · 2021-04-19T17:46:48+00:00

Woman does anything wrong. Men: It was her own fault, she's responsible for her own actions.

Man does anything wrong. Men: 1 billion excuses as to why it wasn't his fault but a woman's fault instead. 🤡

At least you're good entertainment value. 😂😂😂

whosthatcreep · 2021-04-19T23:19:58+00:00

Lmao I rejected plenty of girls who where smarter nicer and cuter than you are

AnonPinkLady · 2021-04-19T23:40:59+00:00

Honestly guys I'm getting real tired of you dodging the question. Hardly any of these comments are actually aimed to prove a point.

I will no longer be replying to comments like:

"Ewww I'd reject you too"/"you're the problem because your hair/FDS, etc"

Personal attacks are childish and only further suggest you have no ground to stand on. You're just avoiding the topic at hand and focusing in on me to put me down. Also it's against the rules

"You're lying/exagerating/it doesnt actually happen"

There are literally millions of examples of attractive women being turned down all over the internet. This is pure denial

"You've only gone after chad"

Lol, just no. Big assumption, you're just wrong. Read the above argument about the millions of examples of attractive women being rejected by average guys

"Women get rejected because they want relationships, all we want is sex"

That doesn't make it any less valid. Rejection is rejection. Wanting to only fuck us and use us for our bodies is a degrading form of rejection. Youd get sick of too if you weren't so envious of it and obsessed to see how lonely and dehumanizing it is. Idgaf about you not getting casual sex and how that's different from romantic rejection, that's not relevant to the post, that's just you looking for a way to win the pity Olympics. Also even as for sex, I can definitely be sure I'd get a no from some guys. Either way, rejection is rejection the point is we struggle with it just as much as you and it wouldnt solve anything to push us to deal with it more

Title	Men: why do you think we don't ever get rejected by you?
Author	AnonPinkLady
Upvotes	57
Comments	434
Date	April 19, 2021 7:14 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/mtv9cw/men_why_do_you_think_we_dont_ever_get_rejected_by/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/men-why-do-you-think-we-dont-ever-get-rejected-by.762572 https://theredarchive.com/post/762572

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