Paternity Tests, why is it so taboo?

Undedmekko · 2023-01-02T15:32:24+00:00

If she’s leaving me because I asked for a paternity test, I definitely want that paternity test.

OrionBartholomew · 2023-01-02T15:23:19+00:00

Immediately after she left him, she filed for child support.

Crunchy_toast_01 · 2023-01-02T16:25:53+00:00

I also saw that post the woman said that the baby had different coloured skin from him but kinda looked similar to him maybe that's why he asked for the DNA test..

Some people were telling her that it should be okay and she should give the guy his peace of mind and do the test..

Others were like you shouldn't be with someone who doesn't trust you..

vmBob · 2023-01-02T15:44:08+00:00

France actually made it illegal unless there's a court order. Apparently the results of the tests were far too disruptive to society.

https://www.ibdna.com/paternity-testing-ban-upheld-in-france/

SebTheMenace · 2023-01-02T16:57:12+00:00

Is it true that in some countries it is illegal for men to ask for paternity test ?

Ok-Translator2294 · 2023-01-02T15:22:50+00:00

Even the thought that women can indulge in infidelity is repulsive to some. It hurts their feelings and the idea that only men are the ones who cheat.

We can eliminate the whole lack of trust debate by making paternity tests and prenups mandatory. But of course you won't see many women supporting that.

PuertoRock007 · 2023-01-02T15:23:41+00:00

The truth is that if it were the other way and it was men that got pregnant, women would be getting DNA test and they wouldn't care how we felt. Then they would just be talking about a woman's right to know.

KateOfLate · 2023-01-02T17:08:36+00:00

Personally, I think every child should be given a paternity test at birth. That way it takes the "you don't trust me" out of the equation. It would be just be one of the many tests a newborn is given.

Reasonable_Listen514 · 2023-01-02T15:35:52+00:00

Not sure why guys ask permission to DNA test. Just swab the kid and send in the test. If it's a match, she never has to know the test was done. Know the laws in your state. Even if you sign the acknowledgment of paternity, most states have a grace period where you can be taken off the BC if a DNA test shows you aren't the dad.
If you do ask, it should not be a surprise. This is the kind of thing you need to make your opinion known on before getting a woman pregnant. You could always frame it as making sure the baby wasn't accidentally switched in the hospital, which has happened. Mom should want the peace of mind of knowing for sure she left the hospital with the right kid.
Men need to hold their ground on this issue. It needs to become commonplace for every birth. It is the only protection men have against getting exploited by a sexist family law system that has no problem making a man pay for a kid he didn't father.

abusmakk · 2023-01-02T17:26:06+00:00

I became a father yesterday, and today I received a document that I have to sign and return to the government. Although I trust my girlfriend, I do believe that a paternity test should be mandatory just to take all doubt away.

She knows, the kid came out from her. We have to trust her. And I assume most women giving birth are truthful to their partner, there are enough examples to make sure that a paternity test is worth it.

And God forbid you can ask for a paternity test. The entire society would go bananas and point at you as the bad guy.

rickmackdaddy · 2023-01-02T16:36:44+00:00

Baby already born? A swab of the inside of the cheek is all you need for a paternity test, mail it into a lab. You could do 23andMe or any other genetic test too, doesn’t have to be paternity, but if you both do it it will tell you if you’re related.

LowlyLizzieBCG · 2023-01-02T17:12:35+00:00

Accountability. Never popular. Facts. Also not popular. Leads to accountability. Lol

throwaway3569387340 · 2023-01-02T17:54:33+00:00

Somewhere between 10-20% of men in committed relationships are raising at least one child that is not biologically theirs without their knowledge.

Draw your own conclusions.

spinbutton · 2023-01-02T15:51:54+00:00

I love the idea of paternity tests. I think all new Borns should be checked and if necessary ensure the correct parents are taking responsibility for their child

mrkpxx · 2023-01-02T17:22:59+00:00

Paternity Tests should be mandatory.

heydickbags · 2023-01-02T17:33:52+00:00

She left him before he found out the truth lol

A_for_Anonymous · 2023-01-02T15:28:46+00:00

It's taboo if not illegal because it's not convenient for women.

Perfect_Sir4820 · 2023-01-02T18:46:42+00:00

Anything done with the express purpose of holding women accountable for their actions is taboo.

ItPutsLotionOnItSkin · 2023-01-02T18:52:12+00:00

The biggest thing that makes it taboo is that it takes away a potential source of income from the mother. If it is found out that the child is not his than the mother has to find money to support it and if the mother can't the government has to. It's just easier and more profitable to tack it on to a male who has the potential to support the child, mom and government.

SpikedApe · 2023-01-02T17:43:12+00:00

Saw that same post.

Suggest paternity test seem like a solid good idea to do in this day and age where 30% of fathers end up raising a kid that's not theirs.

34 downvotes

Great success

CawlinAlcarz · 2023-01-02T17:31:12+00:00

It's pre-programmed gaslighting by the feminist agenda. Honestly, you could argue that it might be pre-programmed throughout the history of organized society.

Cuckoldry has been around since there have been two men and one woman around... so... forever.

People agree to get STD tests before they start having unprotected sex with each other.

Men are asked by women to blindly "trust" that the woman takes her birth control regularly - when we all know good and fucking well that this trust is misplaced quite a bit more often than anyone is actually comfortable talking about.

The paternity issue is perhaps the biggest "checkmate" move that unscrupulous women have against men today. Mandatory, or routine paternity testing of ALL births would remove a MASSIVE piece of leverage for such women, and so they are programmed to react as if the very idea of paternity testing would be a complete affront to them.

wiptcream · 2023-01-02T21:54:19+00:00

i’ve heard it all: “you should just trust me, dead beat, POS, denying his child blah blah blah.” then it came back negative. then it’s water works “i don’t know how this could have happened”

GltyUntlPrvnInncnt · 2023-01-02T17:34:09+00:00

Because so many women would be caught cheating on their spouses. They can't allow that to happen.

CutiePie0023 · 2023-01-02T18:52:18+00:00

Personally I think paternity tests should be mandatory. I mean what’s the big deal about wanting to know that that’s your kid?

Martian_Expat_001 · 2023-01-02T19:12:39+00:00

Asking a woman about paternity implies she's a whore. The trick is to have it as a mandatory procedure by the hospital in order to remove the accusation. Even if only 1 percent of men suffer paternity fraud that's still almost four million in America.

ConestogaCreek · 2023-01-02T22:17:18+00:00

Anything women don’t like is bad. That’s the rule.

ABVerageJoe69 · 2023-01-02T17:48:34+00:00

I felt this way before having a kid. I’m 6’9” and my son was off the height charts at 2 months old with many similarities, so don’t think it’s needed for me. My brother in law on the other hand, had a black baby despite being redheaded with nearly no pigmentation and I felt like an actual crazy person while everyone played along with “that’s his baby” for months before a test was done.

HumpableJson · 2023-01-02T18:17:20+00:00

In short, it's considered taboo because god forbid a woman is made uncomfortable in today's society lmao

bailjoh · 2023-01-02T17:19:43+00:00

It’s not a big deal, if she thinks it is then that’s her problem. Don’t raise anyone’s kids but yours. Keep that in mind at the voting box for school board elections too, you are not responsible for other people’s kids.

Standard-Broccoli107 · 2023-01-02T16:50:23+00:00

Because of a percieved lack of trust. Many people (myself included) is averse to conflict. So we wait to talk about stuff like this.

Then when men after birth demand a paternity test it looks like they dont believe the baby look like them and they expect infidelity.

There is an easier solution to this, but that requires that we take the bull by its horn: we need to tell women that we want a paternity test asap. Preferably before there is a fetus. This way its easier to say that its not distrust but simply a policy.

63daddy · 2023-01-02T16:42:25+00:00

It’s taboo because add use paternity fraud is committed by women against men. If it was the other way around we would go to extremes to prevent it and defrauders wouldn’t get off so easy.

aigars2 · 2023-01-02T17:23:25+00:00

Lack of information. Men don't realize each third kid born is from another man.

Rexcadere · 2023-01-02T18:44:00+00:00

It's not the kind of equality feminists are fighting for.

binkerfluid · 2023-01-02T22:33:27+00:00

She had the nerve to say her priority was her kid.

I told her her top priority was her ego and she was giving her kid a statistically worse outcome because he asked a question that many others didnt and got burned on and she got offended.

Its easy for her because she knows 100% but a many guys were deceived by girls they trusted 100%

but this is exactly why its bullshit when women say "you can get a paternity test whenever you want now, theres no reason for the hospital/govt/whatever to be involved"

TrapLordSteezus · 2023-01-02T18:11:09+00:00

It's simple manipulation, women have mastered it against men. THEY DON'T WANT TO BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE. So hold them all accountable. They're gonna spew hateful misandryst rhetoric and call you an incel and blame the manosphere. Just like when they encounter men doing anything else that's completely justifiable that they don't like. Women were championing this broad to break her family apart. Selfish and self serving alone.

justthinkingabout1 · 2023-01-02T18:35:46+00:00

It’s the first time in history (new history) we’ve been able to expose female dating strategies. Paternity fraud has been statistically huge, globally.

Trust but verify. They fucking hate that.

LoomisKnows · 2023-01-02T18:18:33+00:00

I saw this thread too and made the mistake on engaging with these whackjobs and essentially they just view it as him accusing her of cheating and that he should have stated he wanted a paternity test before they had sex? I have yet to squeeze any thing out of them that I can understand it's all boiling down to 'man has rights? Bad, bad man woman good'. It literally boils my blood.

craigmunday · 2023-01-02T19:56:09+00:00

This is a matter of women wanting equality when it suits them and maintaining special privileges when it does not.

Women hold privilege when it comes to reproduction and paternity. Men deserve the same level of assurance that women automatically enjoy when it comes to paternity.

All newborns should be paternity tested and this is especially true if the woman didn't take the man's name

gnarlin · 2023-01-02T22:15:01+00:00

This is why paternity tests should be mandatory and done as a matter of fact.

astrorebel · 2023-01-02T19:27:42+00:00

Saw the post as well. Seems to happen a lot in that sub, divorcing over seemingly trivial things. Whatever happened to communicating Something in that marriage must not have been right to begin with.

Zefram71 · 2023-01-02T23:45:54+00:00

It implies they're a cheater? Or they did cheat and aren't sure who the father is and want this guy on the hook. Cuz he has money, and is a decent dude.

Walsy · 2023-01-02T16:22:16+00:00

On an individual basis, a paternity test is no big deal; but if men in general found out exactly how many kids they’re raising that aren’t their own, there would be mandatory paternity tests overnight. Women fear the accountability and loss of power they would have if this was brought to light

ChaoticBorya · 2023-01-02T20:00:08+00:00

Paternity test should be mandatory just like driver’s license…

Codename-18 · 2023-01-02T17:07:15+00:00

Because it's their game. It's deception, as usual. "Trust" is a container word, it may mean whatever, if a thing is very important to a partner but doesn't take anything away from the other it should be done, it's Paretian logic. If she doesn't do it, she doesn't love him enough to give him security.

dojoboy · 2023-01-02T18:26:31+00:00

It should just become mandatory by law for all pregnancies. A man’s natural right, it is.

Once required by law, relationship issues over the paternity test are avoided.

2023-01-02T18:15:40+00:00

It should be mandatory, period

notreallyme762 · 2023-01-02T20:22:53+00:00

I’m for mandatory paternity testing before the birth certificate is signed. Paternity fraud is rampant in the US. It should be a felony.

EviessVeralan · 2023-01-02T18:26:33+00:00

For some women asking for a test out of nowhere would be an accusation of cheating.

For most people, cheating is considered immoral.

cuppa_tea_4_me · 2023-01-02T20:25:12+00:00

Why ask. Just swab the kid yourself.

hatefulreason · 2023-01-03T00:09:04+00:00

could've been worse...or it still could be for some unfortunate sucker

the child will probably end up posting on reddit too

https://archive.ph/K7w1p

Educational-Bad-3610 · 2023-01-03T07:21:26+00:00

Not a dad or anything like that but 1000% support a DNA test to prove that the child is mine. I've seen enough videos and read enough articles to be supportive of this movement. Let's go the extra step and say that if a female claims you're the dad and the test proves otherwise. Said female WILL be charged with fraud.

That alone should cause enough people to say "nope im not claiming any child support" and walking away

chugonthis · 2023-01-03T09:00:58+00:00

It should be standard procedure

JohnWM1984 · 2023-01-03T12:17:32+00:00

A man has the right to know if a child is his. If the child is not his then the child is not his responsibility and he doesn't owe that child anything.

bnhncnyc · 2023-01-03T12:41:53+00:00

It should be mandatory straight after every single birth and women's opinions/feelings about this should be systematically disregarded.

Joey9221 · 2023-01-02T17:39:49+00:00

Although it can be seen as an indicator of trust. If I don’t have any reason to doubt the child is mine, I won’t be even asking it. If I got the slightest idea a girl might be having some side-dishes, I would definitely ask it.

HumpableJson · 2023-01-02T18:16:01+00:00

It's people just getting their feelings hurt when it is something that I think every man is justified in wanting. Imo the girl left because he was probably right and she used him "not trusting her" as an excuse to leave without validating his request. Now she gets to go tell everyone how much of an asshole he is for wanting it. The biggest issue to me is that I've heard hospitals don't want mandatory paternity tests because they need both people present to sign that birth certificate but idk how true that is. I DO know how fucked the system is when it comes to dad's rights in parental court so if that IS true I'm not surprised.

toobroketobitch · 2023-01-02T18:16:22+00:00

Tell them outright in the beginning of the relationship, so you get your baby if it is indeed yours.

WiiWynn · 2023-01-02T18:51:30+00:00

That’s a sure fire sign it wasn’t his kid.

bifewova234 · 2023-01-02T19:44:04+00:00

Something to test for in utero when you're doing all the other genetic tests IMO

Illadrex2 · 2023-01-02T20:47:59+00:00

It's a method women use to shame you for thinking it's possible they stepped out on you...an easy way to gaslight men and thus further manipulate them. Don't fall for it.

Firedamp_Weaponry · 2023-01-02T20:51:51+00:00

Yeah whenever I'm talking to a guy who's girl is expecting I always tell him to do a paternity test once the baby is born. Very easy to collect DNA from the inside of the cheek, and a test doesn't cost too much. If the results come back and say you're the father, great! Throw the test away, don't tell her. Telling her at this point won't achieve anything other than needless drama, so just keep your mouth shut. You bet this is how I'm doing it if I ever have a kid.

stunspot · 2023-01-02T22:23:25+00:00

Every mother in history has had assurance as to paternity. Any woman who would deny a man the same surity is suspect. If she doesn't want a paternity test,you absoLUTEly need one.

2023-01-02T23:21:52+00:00

Should be mandatory before the name goes on the birth certificate. If they can req female reproductive rights in Insurance plans (HBC, contraception etc) they can require blood tests for us

rabel111 · 2023-01-03T00:30:44+00:00

The paternity test erases the "getting away with it" zone that has been enjoyed by adultery for millennia. If every father was entitled to know with equal certainty to every mother, would that be so bad?

The faux offense used to silence men who need to be certain of their fatherhood is simply that, false offense. Trust has nothing to do with certainty, and everything to do with tracing genetic predispositions to disease, wellbeing and geneology.

whats-her-tits · 2023-01-03T00:36:01+00:00

They shouldn't be taboo. I would never cheat on my husband, but if he were to ask for a paternity test I'd be happy to get one done. It honestly sounds more sketchy when a man asks for one and the woman says no. It makes it seem like she has something to hide.

odysseytree · 2023-01-02T17:12:43+00:00

Men don't have the loudest voice in any media communication. So it has become a taboo to talk about because it favours welfare for men.

McFeely_Smackup · 2023-01-02T18:41:23+00:00

It's his fault for asking.

Do it quietly, privately, and go on from there.

Naru4odo · 2023-01-02T20:07:21+00:00

Listen men, you don't need permission, always get it done as a mandatory thing, and you don't need to let them know. They only need to know if the test shows it's not yours. No need to ask or get permission just get it done and move on. Better to know than pay CS for 18 or more years.

_BlueShark87 · 2023-01-02T22:51:24+00:00

Because a lot of women who argue against it have the most to lose from it.

ChaosOpen · 2023-01-02T21:50:16+00:00

Let's face it, she was leaving her boyfriend because she was relatively certain that the child wasn't his and she realized he wasn't so foolish as to simply take her word for it. People who are worthy of your trust tend to have no problem with you testing it because they know it will only vindicate them. The only people playing the "don't you trust me card" are people trying to hide their lies behind it. Either way, she was about to have another man's baby and a paternity test would only serve to expose her lies. Her dropping him so quick was most likely due to having another man already lined up, more than likely the child's actual father.

OrionBartholomew · 2023-01-02T15:35:32+00:00

This is really important to know: Marriage was designed, largely by women's influence, but most certainly by the anti-male, misandric state (males with a lot of power who need women's votes to survive), to ensure men's disposable income falls into the hands of women and the state.

The historical jurisprudence on marriage backs me up. Look up 'Compulsory Conjugality'. It's all about trapping men into passive income streams for women and the state. Marriage is the shackle to the matriarchal plantation.

Also, look up "Meretricious Relationships" and "Committed Intimate Relationships" and "De Facto Marriage/Union". It's all about directing the flow of money from men to women and the state.

trolsor · 2023-01-02T18:31:32+00:00

I wonder, how many sharia man have that type of problem :)) possibly their only issue is being not able to remember which kid from which wife .

YesYesYesVeryGood · 2023-01-02T19:17:43+00:00

As a male with a vasectomy and test results showing that I am sterile, I am the type of male that would be asking for a paternity test.

If the test comes out that I am not the father of the child, I would not be supporting the child and may terminate the relationship.

Easteuroblondie · 2023-01-02T22:09:28+00:00

theyre taboo because they basically imply distrust and that the woman has possibly had more than one partner.

i probably wouldnt like it because of those underlying implications, but I would do it if they really wanted it. no one likes having their loyalty brought into question i guess. same sort of reaction when a women asks to see your phone

periodicchemistrypun · 2023-01-03T01:54:50+00:00

There are better times to ask than when the child’s been around for months. Do it early.

Minute_Ad_1494 · 2023-01-03T02:33:29+00:00

I think full DNA tests should be standard at birth, because they show you what health conditions the baby is at risk for.

However I don't agree with the premise of this post. If a man asks his wife specifically for a paternity test, he's insinuating that she's cheating. Of course she's gonna be upset about that.

PM_ME_YOUR_LAWNCHAIR · 2023-01-03T09:30:51+00:00

I'm bi, and I don't know if I'm going to end up with a man or woman, but I do know I want kids. Paternity tests are a necessity! Switching babies happens; it's not common, but it happens!

DullSpark98 · 2023-01-03T10:32:29+00:00

She was cheating

EvidencePlz · 2023-01-02T15:43:02+00:00

Saw a post on another sub of a girl leaving her boyfriend because he asked for a paternity test

It's normal. There is a gazillion of things that are considered taboo to western women (and the cancer has already spread to other nations too), and there are gazillions of completely unknown reasons she might dump you any time at a moment's notice. Once a upon time a woman dumped me simply because I asked her to verbally humiliate me for 5 minutes on the phone ( I have the humiliation fetish). And this is a woman who I knew and dated for four years and she was so madly in love with me that she tattooed my first name on her arm and told me she'd marry me the moment I propose.

On the other hand, this very same woman wanted to give me a rimjob (that was one of her fetish), mind you, which I found disgusting and very politely said "no", but what I didn't do was to pack up and leave.

My point is: asking for a paternity test is not the only reason she might wanna leave you. There could be lots of other reasons she could come up with. Dating, relationship, marriage etc nowadays are like the wild wild west except for the fact that you are just one man fighting an entire army, and the woman is the judge and jury. It's not worth it at all unless you got a lot of spare money (think Jeff Bezo level money) and time to waste. You also need to be a very brave person physically and mentally. A single false accusation of rape, sexual assault etc from the woman and it's game over for you and your future.

Working-Independent8 · 2023-01-02T19:42:44+00:00

It's such a difficult one. I'm imagining right now that I've gone through the pain, mess, and gore that comes with birthing a baby and am in the most vulnerable place of my whole life. Then my husband, the one person I can always trust to love and protect me, asks for proof that I haven't gone and slept with another guy and cuckholded him.

I'd be devastated he thought me capable of such a thing, especially if our relationship has been great up until that point. I'm not sure we'd recover from something like that in the context of my own situation (married, not someone who has ever slept around/done the one night stand thing, faithful and very communicative about where I am/who I'm with etc)

On the other hand, I can understand the doubts that some men have and sympathise with that whole "but what if this baby isn't mine" thing. I really do.

But what's the answer? Making tests more of the norm would work for me. Do a quick cheek swab when you're weighing the baby and doing that whole cleanup thing, and Bob's your uncle.

Then it's not out of the blue. Everyone knows what to expect, and there are fewer cases of paternity fraud.

MusicFinal · 2023-01-02T20:42:30+00:00

Agreed. However, purchase your own test and proceed.

reverbiscrap · 2023-01-02T18:49:59+00:00

I told my wife before we had children I wanted paternity tests for any we had, and it was non-negotiable.

She agreed easily, and here we are.

mllhild · 2023-01-02T20:07:56+00:00

Because then all the cheating sluts would have to use condoms while cheating and they dont want to. Also imagine the horror of having to actually bear your husband/boyfriends child.

quantainium_pasta · 2023-01-02T21:03:39+00:00

It is taboo because most women and all male white knights want only what's best for the woman.

Since a paternity test can hurt the woman (aka, whoops you make a lot of money but you're not the real father), they want to do everything they can to stop it, including shaming anyone who wants a test, and acting shocked and offended if anyone tries to get one.

volstock2098 · 2023-01-02T21:58:31+00:00

Because ONLY women get to choose if the sex happens. Men are just rutting beasts, incapable of restraint. Hashtag end rape culture.

So, if you're asking for a test you're questioning the process in which a woman decided to have sex after the fact. Only women can do that.

Valzemodeus · 2023-01-03T00:04:18+00:00

So, as a gay man, I kind of feel like an outsider when I weigh in on these things.

I get that it's a "lack of trust".

However, I also acknowledge that "trust" is all too often used as a weapon by liars.

Quite frankly, if she has nothing to worry about then she should not be upset that he is taking measures to ensure his trust was not violated. It's not a paradox. It's a matter of not leaving things to chance.

She wants him to trust her. She isn't going to lift a single finger to punish her sisters when they pull bullshit? She's not going to punish them?

She has done nothing to earn that trust by default.

You don't get "obligation" without fulfilling obligation.

No free lunch.

The price of holding someone else up to a higher standard is that you allow yourself to be held up to a higher standard.

chortle-guffaw · 2023-01-02T16:12:46+00:00

There's no reason he needed to ask her for a paternity test. He could have done this discretely.

BirdicBirb505 · 2023-01-03T03:05:33+00:00

It would imply infidelity. Or at least the assumption of infidelity on your behalf.

hehimCA · 2023-01-02T18:35:17+00:00

Should be mandatory.

OctaviaPinfold · 2023-01-02T19:30:42+00:00

People who argue about trust probably do things behind others' backs they shouldn't be doing. The thing is, whether you trust somebody or doesn't have no barring on what that person does or doesn't do, there's no connection. You can fully trust somebody and that somebody can still cheat on you and the reverse can also be true. Arguing about trust makes no sense, that's not how the world works, people won't not cheat because somebody trusts them, and cheating is incredibly common. Also, there's a 1:1000 predicted chance that a baby gets switched in the hospital, too, the worse the healthcare system is where you're from, the more neglectful people are and the higher this chance gets.

And as you said, children are a way too important commitment in your life to leave anything up to chance.

planned_serendipity1 · 2023-01-02T20:49:33+00:00

I recommend that men talk to their SO about this issue early in the relationship. Do it in a roundabout way but let her know that you will be asking for a paternity test. When they know up front it won't be a surprise and they will be less offended.

tum1ro · 2023-01-03T06:15:41+00:00

Last week I has a discussion about this topic with a female working colleague. I was defending that with today's technology, all the babies should have a paternity test at birth done in the hospital, just like the many other tests that are done.

She was astonished and asked me why would that be necessary. My argumentation was the following: imagine that a woman raises a kid for 18 years, only to discover it was exchanged at birth in the hospital and she raised someone else's kid. "That would be terrible" - she said. Now imagine that we have a cheap and easy way to make sure the baby is the correct one by putting a barcode bracelet around his leg. "That is the thing to do". Ok, now imagine that you are a man and now there is a cheap and fast way to make sure that you will be raising your own kid and not another man's kid. Wouldn't that be also important? "Of course. You have opened my eyes to a problem I didn't knew it existed"

These tests are also important for the child as they do not discover at 15 years old that the guy the call father is in fact to a blood régates parent.

Devi1s-Advocate · 2023-01-03T01:09:29+00:00

If its a big deal theyre likely trying to hide something and you should want that test even more.

pm_me_your_buttbulge · 2023-01-03T01:44:41+00:00

The implication is she might have cheated. Most people don't cheat - which is why it's a fairly serious implication.

Practically everyone gets hurt when it's even lightly implied you colored outside of the lines.

But, like drunk driving, the odds of a bad thing happening are fairly small. The consequences of a bad thing happening are very big though.

When drunk driving, most people get home safely with zero issues. Like it or not, you can even be fairly drunk and succeed regularly at getting home. This is why most news reports talk about how absolutely shit faced someone was when a thing happened.

Similarly, when an event happens, people's lives are ruined. Even the kid will be hurt when the person they think is their father - isn't. Even if you're a fucking amazing dad - the thought in the back of their head will be "why didn't my bio dad want me?" even if he was never told.

Below, without sources but let's go with it, 1 in 5 men aren't the father. 80% of them are though. But 20% isn't tiny to the point of being insignificant either.

Still though - no one likes the accusation of even the possibility they cheated.

Prenups are slightly different. At least the person wanting the prenup is, for a fact, able to take care of you. So if you love them, and trust them, it really isn't a big deal because you're set.

I had a DNA test for an accusation. Wasn't mine. 20 years later she still thinks I'm the bio father and it must have been a mistake. Some women really are desperate for a specific reality to exist. That's the same chick that caused me to realize how toxic feminism is and how toxic many of the women were in my life. They made a lot of wild assumptions about me and when it was all shown to be bullshit, funny how they shut their mouth real quick but never apologized. They are not friends anymore.

LeButtMonkey · 2023-01-03T04:06:55+00:00

If paternity tests became normalized and generally accepted it would narrow women's options for maximizing the extraction of resources from and the manipulation of men. Whether they feel they'd ever exercise them or not, women cling greedily to their options and privileges, just in case (lacking consistent, internal ethical strictures and facing no external accountability, women like to keep their options open). Believe it or not, the writer of the Reddit post whose girlfriend left him is better off without her. The idea that a woman would be offended by the requirement of a paternity test is absolutely absurd. One can only imagine the increasing number of unreasonable expectations and demands such a woman would make of her partner in the future. I have no doubt that if women's parentage was not guaranteed, you'd hear every woman on the face of the earth screeching in unison that maternity tests were a human right (to be paid at taxpayers expense, of course, to make up for someone's oppression... somewhere... 150 years ago....chained to the stove....math is sexist....the "ooga booga, aint I scary" patriarchy or some shit like that).

HearMeowWorsen · 2023-01-03T10:31:21+00:00

Because women know that most of them are cheating, disloyal tramps. Hell, in France you're not even allowed to do one without a court order because SO many sluts were cheating on their men it was going to literally disrupt their civilization.

ButInThe90sThough · 2023-01-03T01:55:12+00:00

"French psychologists suggest that fatherhood is determined by society not by biology."

Fuck they bastard, honestly... I'm glad this shit isn't american law.

https://www.ibdna.com/paternity-testing-ban-upheld-in-france/

cjgager · 2023-01-03T02:10:02+00:00

it's reasonable to assume - the more partners a girl has the more antsy she might be

randonumero · 2023-01-03T03:24:54+00:00

It's taboo because every women claims to not be that type and in many situations if you aren't the dad, the woman is screwed financially. I'd say a huge reason is also the state. The state hates to be the baby daddy and that's why laws are written to ensure there is one on record.

Honestly I can see how some women would see it as a lack of trust but to paraphrase my friend's dad the only grandkids he knows are really his are the ones that came out of his daughters.

I have a kid and I'm not married but I got a paternity test. I had a married co-worker and every kid he had with his wife was paternity tested. They did have fidelity issues but even without them, it's a smart thing to do

RoninUnderground · 2023-01-03T04:02:26+00:00

Many women want unconditional loyalty without having to earn it.

needalife94 · 2023-01-03T05:27:39+00:00

Me personally, I think paternity tests should be mandatory. Like after the baby is born the paternity test should be applied. I remember hearing about a study that showed 1 in 4 men are raising a child that isn't theirs. Also the show paternity court shows a bunch of "your not the father" type of moments.

ThaRedHoodie · 2023-01-02T20:45:11+00:00

Don't even ask, just do it. Not knowing if a kid is yours isn't something women can relate to. They wouldn't understand, and it's none of their business.

Vanishingastronaut · 2023-01-02T21:53:21+00:00

I saw that post earlier, I have a high school story where a couple friends had a child, the woman started saying it wasn't his, he got a paternity test and it was in fact his.

Just because you are in a relationship and everything is perfect today, doesn't mean tomorrow will hold on to that promise. Her also wanting to up and leave because he's concerned about the paternity of the child is also concerning but let's jump over that lol.

ButInThe90sThough · 2023-01-03T01:49:07+00:00

Saw the same post. Somebody said "and I'd take him to be put on child support right after".

The irony.

adam-l · 2023-01-03T05:59:28+00:00

Paternity tests should be mandatory.

SnooBeans6591 · 2023-01-02T19:37:17+00:00

I would always do a paternity test without asking, if the results showed I wasn't the father, I openly ask for a test.

Unless I told her that I would always want a test before she even got pregnant, I'll not tell her about my intentions.

ghosquetti · 2023-01-02T21:14:39+00:00

I dont think a father wanting a paternity test is an issue as long as its brought up in a kind, respectful way (if there's no suspected cheating obviously). Specifically if a man wanted one no matter what when the child is born, but it should be mentioned beforehand and not just sprung on someone right after they give birth. However i did see the post you're talking about, and while i do think she is either leaving something out or overreacting, the way he did it was pretty rude. The child was already 3 years old from what i gathered, and she stated while the child is the same skin tone as her, they look just like their father. He essentially brought it up as she states out of nowhere, casually, and it was immediately a ultimatum. Essentially "i have decided i want this and if you dont get it we are done." Without any further conversation or elaboration until a day later. So, i dont think the main issue is the paternity test OP.

WhiteRollins24 · 2023-01-03T01:30:16+00:00

When the time comes I will tell my future GF if I can have a paternity test BEFORE the baby is born. I don't understand why paternity tests are so taboo for people who are in relationships or marriages, but I think men should ask for a paternity test in the beginning of the relationship/marriage or at least before the pregnancy/early in the pregnancy or before the due date(when the baby is born).

Incogneto308 · 2023-01-03T03:58:29+00:00

Because the test would prove the kid isn't yours.

ForgotOldAcc-_- · 2023-01-03T04:54:07+00:00

U know the answer

Dasherlink · 2023-01-02T18:21:02+00:00

I feel like if you NEED to do it to trust your partner, this ain't your partner

forgottenmeh · 2023-01-03T02:47:05+00:00

BECAUSE ITS ACCUSING HER OF CHEATING! its a massive insult and break of trust. unless you have real cause to believe she is cheating you are just insulting her

SecondEldenLord · 2023-01-03T01:12:58+00:00

Sounds to me like the father just dodged a bullet from a potential cheater.

StingRayFins · 2023-01-02T20:10:58+00:00

The one I hear is babies cannot consent to it

compellinglymediocre · 2023-01-02T21:22:04+00:00

i tried to crosspost it to this sub. I didn’t get the big deal

starsfighte · 2023-01-02T21:54:28+00:00

i don't now how the paternity test done in your country but so easy to do no need for here consent ,,, just a check?!

hooklips · 2023-01-02T18:12:12+00:00

It necessarily implies infidelity. Obviously.

TwinkForAHairyBear · 2023-01-02T22:56:58+00:00

Lol the replies there are insane and selfish.

Most relationships are based on trust. If there is no trust then relationship doesn't make sense because why would you be with someone whom you don't trust. "Paternity tests aren't about mistrust" total bullshit. Unless you're Saint Joseph, the statements "I trust my wife that she didn't have sex with other men and even if she did she'd tell me" and "the child isn't mine" are simply contradictory.

Imagine your wife going through your text messages once in a while "it's not that I don't trust you, but you know, I can't afford having you get another woman pregnant".

If you and your wife don't trust each other you two aren't a marriage, you're roommates. Which is fine, as long as BOTH sides view the relationship the same way.

Sharp_Hope6199 · 2023-01-03T01:47:31+00:00

From a loyal woman’s perspective, if I were ever asked for a paternity test, it would completely destroy the relationship. Because it would show that he didn’t trust me, and I can’t build a relationship on that level of doubt.

I believe when a woman realizes she’s pregnant, the man should decide whether or not to take that responsibility. To sign the birth certificate accepting responsibility.

If they split later, and custody/child support is involved, then a paternity test should come into play. If the child is not his, he would have no further financial responsibility or parenting time than his own free will.

Just remember that, though not incredibly common, chimeras exist, and it’s devastating personally when paternity tests turn out negative. (That’s for both men and women to be aware of, not just men).

On the other hand …

Maybe it would be a good idea to normalize DNA testing to be as routine as any other immunization. That way the parents will find out if anything in their genes has been passed down, like specific diseases. Both parents would need testing to, for science, and a greater understanding of how genes move through generations.

I think that in order to minimize social disruption, we would also have to normalize caring for children who aren’t biologically ours (especially for fathers), and possibly provide a stipend or subsidy to families that stick together with an array of genetic offspring.

Emotional_Art_4628 · 2023-01-02T22:23:37+00:00

I think it shouldn’t be taboo. If someone has any doubts about parentage, they should be able to ask without people judging them for it. However, she shouldn’t be judged for leaving him either. Relationships are about trust and if anyone can’t trust a partner enough to believe them on whether they are the father of their child the relationship has already fundamentally seen it’s natural conclusion.

Seamonkey_Boxkicker · 2023-01-02T16:07:17+00:00

What makes you think they’re taboo?

tonando · 2023-01-02T18:53:16+00:00

You can't just put a cotton swab into everyones mouth. People would rebel!

2023-01-03T12:57:56+00:00

Paternity tests should be mandatory when the couple is not married. The husband should at least be given the option of a paternity test if the couple is married.

SupremeFuzler · 2023-01-03T13:00:18+00:00

I was tempted to get a paternity test when my wife cheated and destroyed our marriage with the kind of callousness that would shock Dahmer. But you look at him and the kid is very, very clearly mine. He's damn near a clone lol.

Title	Paternity Tests, why is it so taboo?
Author	stupidfock
Upvotes	875
Comments	443
Date	January 2, 2023 3:09 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/101eud9/paternity_tests_why_is_it_so_taboo/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/paternity-tests-why-is-it-so-taboo.1147458 https://theredarchive.com/post/1147458

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