Gender misconceptions

MasterTeacher123 · 2024-02-27T12:43:50+00:00

The boldness of the average man in terms of approaching. The average dude don’t got the balls to hit on women he finds attractive unless he’s hammered at a club or bar

Soul_vaccine · 2024-02-27T14:49:57+00:00

That men are violent predators.

I think the source is a very real fear of men because of men who are criminals.

I get it. However, I’m still allowed to complain about how it bums me out.

TotalTravesty · 2024-02-27T13:13:54+00:00

That men are simpletons who can’t understand emotional nuance and just want food and sex to achieve the pinnacle of happiness. This misconception comes from both inside the house and from the female pick me community. No clue why. Perhaps because certain people who are tried of being adults are trying to get their whole gender to get treated like children again? Perhaps because having a reputation as The Woman Who Understands Men is way more tempting than actually understanding men? Either way it’s annoying and the opposite of advocacy.

BeepBeepYeah7789 · 2024-02-27T13:28:17+00:00

That men just can't (or don't want to) keep it in their pants.

nosingaboutonreddit · 2024-02-27T16:17:48+00:00

That women are innately born with the knowledge of how to clean, iron, sew and cook. Oh, and we enjoy it and naturally all women in relationships are to blame for an untidy house.

Makuta_Servaela · 2024-02-27T13:42:53+00:00

Sex inherently has some permanent corruption ability on us (ranging from "hymen breaking" to "men's DNA collects in our brains". Even lesbians push it with the "Gold star" thing, implying just as much as straight men that penises are some kind of cursed object.
That acknowledging women's less upper-body and grip strength is implying that women are weak/dainty/have less value than men/ aren't strong in other ways.
That lesbians are somehow more violent than straight men. That myth gets debunked every time it rears its head, but men still bring it up when we talk about male violence in relationships.

Few-Laugh-6508 · 2024-02-27T12:43:42+00:00

That women all have sex on tap and that makes their whole lives a breeze, all women want only the hottest, tallest, richest men, and all women are after men's money.

This is the biggest echo chamber for these things that I have ever seen.

Muskelmaus · 2024-02-27T12:28:15+00:00

Women are all a hive mind, like the same things, and have the same opinions.

Gravel_Roads · 2024-02-27T14:08:52+00:00

That men only need their "balls drained and belly full" to enjoy a relationship. (And all the other iterations that suggest men have almost zero standards and would live in a filthy cardboard box if it weren't for the desire to impress women.)

Men are just as complicated as women. Men who think they would be happy with "a woman, any woman, it doesn't matter who" are so far removed from social settings that they don't realize relationships are MOSTLY TALKING and hanging out and sharing your interests with each other. People who get together with the mentality that desperate "anyone will do" energy are the ones who end up sleeping in separate bedrooms because they don't really know anything about eachother and don't really know how to learn.

ArmariumEspada · 2024-02-27T13:01:55+00:00

That male sexuality is shallow, carnal, and rooted in physical pleasure, but female sexuality is conversely more “mature” and rooted in emotional connections and personality instead. And that women are supposedly not carnally minded or shallow when it comes to a man’s looks.

Ok-Dust-4156 · 2024-02-27T13:09:04+00:00

Absolutely yes. Idea that men are some sort of superhumans that can just "man up" trough everything is false. Idea that if you're successful in one field then it will give you confidence when you deal with women is false too. Same with strange idea than men are born with understanding of women, I personally seen women who were surprised that you have to learn that and not have this knowledge installed into you from birth. Men aren't some sort of animals that can't control their behaviour and lust, it's just an excuse that some shitty men use to explain their shitty behaviour. "Being a man" how it defined by media and society is just a very bad deal for men.

Fan_Service_3703 · 2024-02-27T12:32:20+00:00

Men are more looks focused than women. Not sure where it came from, likely from women being treated as property, and therefore not being valued for much except their looks. It's definitely not something innate.

AstronautExisting230 · 2024-02-27T18:10:08+00:00

that women are these fundamentally evil, non empathetic, creatures that just use men for their own benefit.

Adventurous-Fox-62 · 2024-02-27T13:22:55+00:00

Almost every post here is a misconception, because people forget to touch grass and forget that PPD is not representative of any group. But in real life, people rarely have false misconceptions. Or it's just my environment, that is very open-minded. Other that women being better caretakers it's hard to remember any often held beliefs.

howdoiw0rkthisthing · 2024-02-27T14:15:56+00:00

That women are less capable or even incapable of love.

There’s an old manosphere bit, “men love idealistically, women love opportunistically.” In other words, men are the hopeless romantics who have to take the redpill if they stand a chance and women are actually the pragmatists when it comes to relationships.

Kept me up at night until I found out that idealistically means just that: they love the idea of a woman, not the woman herself, and then claim to be more virtuous for it.

A lot of this miscommunication comes down to the conflation of love and puppy love or lust.

FineDevelopment00 · 2024-02-27T12:36:35+00:00

What do you feel is the biggest misconception about your gender that gets posted all the time?

That we - not individual bad eggs as undoubtedly exist in the human race unfortunately, but my sex as a whole - gleefully live for making men miserable, because it's supposedly inherent to our nature.

And what do you think is its source?

Manosphere rhetoric flimsily supported by speculative evo-psych, and some guys' personal experience with individual bad eggs. Some of those guys even have a thing for toxic types, and/or follow redpill advice which ofc attracts toxic types, and then assume AWALT.

Do you think it's completely untrue and made up to fit a narrative?

Yes.

Due to a person's limamated expression with your gender?

In some cases, yes.

Could it even be a media stereotype that gets bashed about?

Oh, definitely. The media twists a lot of things and presents them as the norm when they aren't.

why do you think we see multiple posts about the same things and are people aware of the echo chamber we become when this happens? Is there a barrier in posting for some people and what intresting topics often get missed as we seem to be talking g about the same three themes.

Some spaces will ban certain topics. Therefore people who wish to discuss and debate those topics flock to other spaces which allow freer discussion and debate which is fine. But I also suspect there are bots and human agitators spreading toxic propaganda on the Internet to further divide the populace by any means possible, including instigating gender wars. Some people fall for it and some don't.

butagoodpersonality · 2024-02-27T18:17:26+00:00

It’s gotta be hivemind. While I think there’s something to be said for social validation from your friends and Preselection I feel it’s just such a cop out to say women all think the same.

In a lot of ways women all think the same in a lot of ways men all think the same in a lot of ways humans all think the same.

AnonPinkLady · 2024-02-28T01:17:40+00:00

Just the general idea that women don’t pine for men romantically or ever get rejected, don’t do romantic gestures and are selfish and passive. I’m extremely romantic and always have been and I grew up an ugly duckling. I got rejected constantly. I had crushes all the time. I asked boys to dances, I made them gifts and drawings. As an adult I’m a hopeless romantic still. I asked my boyfriend to be with me, I said I love you first and many times over. I hand dipped a hundred strawberries in white chocolate and drizzled them with pink chocolate and a dash of white sprinkles on top for our anniversary. I make him video game assets and characters, I make animated videos about us. I care so much and I give so much just to be told I don’t exist. It’s so frustrating.

RubyDiscus · 2024-02-27T14:40:36+00:00

That women have life on "easy mode".

As if somehow having more opposite sex attention makes up for having to menstruate each month and having loads of potential problems related to ovaries or uterus and child birth.

Men who think women have it easy are delusional.

Thrashing around in pain a portion of each month and having surgeries for endometriosis ain't easy mode bro.

obviousredflag · 2024-02-27T17:20:26+00:00

What do you feel is the biggest misconception about your gender that gets posted all the time?

That men struggle to get into relationships or don't have regular sex in their relationships. There isn't a single piece of evidence that points into that direction, while all the evidence supports that very few men are perpetually single and very few men have no sex in their relationships against their preference.

The source for that is incel infested subs like this. Meeting so many men with a shared situation and views makes it appear as if it's a way larger percentage of men than it actually is. Also, they actively inflate their numbers and claim they are "average men" while they are absolutely not average men. Because if their situation was typical for "average men" then they would have a solid case to be furious about some cultural situation that is responsible for their situation. And that we would need societal movements and change to get to a just system. Being many has a lot of benefits to get what you want.

Yeah, it is made to fit the narrative that there is something systemically broken with "modern dating" (as they call it) and "modern women", because how else could men be single or in sexless relationships?

The sexless relationship part is a coping mechanism to attack anyone who said: "wait, actually most men are in relationships so that you claim most men have trouble with finding a partner can't be true" with a rebuttal "yeah maybe, but those men are super unhappy in their relationships because they get not sex and are just used as cash cows". Which there is also no evidence for. Men are happy in relationships overall.

Add in studies, articles or the posts to help support debates and give context.

I have done that in >100 comments, citing studies, posting pictures of data/graphs/ articles. I have used every evidence there is to show how the men in this sub are mostly wrong about the stuff they believe.

It has not changed a SINGLE INDIVIDUALS MIND. Because they don't want to believe the truth. It hurts to know that you are one of the few single percentage guys how is a foreveralone rejected incel in your thirties. It hurts to know that people just like you are successful in mating, because that means it's actually YOUR issue and not women's/society's/culture's. So the normal thing to do is reject all the evidence, close your eyes, go to your echochambers and listen to content creators who tell you exactly what you want to hear. Then you adopt some ways to get out of having to deal with evidence, like "surveys are all lies", "women lie", "men lie", "government lies", just like the conspiracy theory idiots or religious people "God works in mysterious ways" when there are obvious contradictions that would lead to a breaking down of the ideology.

This whole sub is pointless. Nobody comes here, open to change their mind. I am just here because i like to argue and read mating science.

Gold_Supermarket1956 · 2024-02-27T18:51:21+00:00

That were all big scary sexual predators who only think about sex and violence

Zealousideal_Bar_749 · 2024-02-27T12:40:35+00:00

That men are entitled.

I've never met a man that didn't take for granted, to a self-destructive degree, that everything they get in life they have to fight for it. Whether they analogize it as hunting, or conquering, or just working for what you get, it can be communicated in a dozen ways, but a lot of guys are toxically "meritocratic". It's all about results or nothing. If you can't feed yourself then you starve. No one owes you anything. You don't deserve anything. Unless you go out and earn it or take.

That's how hustlers do, it's how hunters do, it's how conquerors do, it's how the ambitious do.

This idea that men are entitled I think is a mixture of projection from women and also a misunderstanding of certain kinds of discourse. In modern times, meritocracy is at least the expectation of most people even if we all also know that the world is run by favoritism, nepotism, pure dumb luck. So it would make sense that women wouldn't really want to sit with how arbitrary their relationship to men is. They engage with us in a very haphazard way.

In terms of how they handle access to the opposite sex, no one is more entitled than women are. In civilized society, you're way more apt to find a woman that doesn't know how to take a no. You're also more likely to find a woman that trivializes men's sexuality as easy.

We just sensationalize it when men can't handle that women are other people that don't want them or want to put up with laziness, but we normalize it when a woman does it.

misunderstanding of certain kinds of discourse.

Also, women just see men complaining about relationships and love and sex like an expression of entitlement when it's the entire opposite. Men who want things to be different are recognizing that the way things are is entirely out of their control. They don't own you, you are entirely outside of their ability to change and affect.

What women call entitlement is just impotence and frustration. Neither of which they see as valid emotions or traits in men. The idea of a weak and tired man wanting any kind of love in his life is viscerally disgusting to many of them so they bring out the entitled card.

While of course, they're sitting comfortable somewhere enjoying a dating culture where their access to basic human connection exists at a fingertip, saying that men are entitled.

UpbeatInsurance5358 · 2024-02-27T12:58:28+00:00

That all women can just have sex and have an army of male admirers at beck and call.

Safinated · 2024-02-27T15:27:38+00:00

I don’t think there’s many misconceptions. Just attempts to push their own self interest

For example, men know that women don’t value sex the way men do, but they try to argue that we do or should. Because equality, or they’ll kill us, or women are evil

TheGreatBeefSupreme · 2024-02-27T12:21:14+00:00

That men are suppressing their emotions when they aren’t expressing them in a way that someone else deems appropriate. I believe that actual emotion suppression among men is rare. Men (by nature, I’d argue) just have a much narrower emotional range than women do. We don’t have the highs or the lows. Sometimes we literally just feel nothing.

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lolthankstinder · 2024-02-27T15:31:37+00:00

I think the idea that “men care more about looks” is a misconception that actually comes from women having generally unrealistic/inflated physical standards of men. Women are less likely to find comparably desirable men attractive so when interacting with comparably desirable, realistically attainable guys, women are perceived as “overlooking looks” rather than having unrealistic physical standards/expectations.

CraftyCooler · 2024-02-27T12:39:43+00:00

I think that one of misconceptions of men about themselves is that men are more rational sex, but facts seem to to contradict this statement. Proof:

men are more likely to participate in gambling(gambling is irrational)
men are more likely to commit suicide - self harm is not rational
men are less likely to pursue education - more education statistically brings more income
men are more likely to be incarcerated
men are more likely to be addicted (be it drugs, alcohol, video games, porn) - addiction brings down quality of life, so is irrational.
men are less likely to seek help in situation of mental health issues - even though these issues are more likely resulting in suicide

All these irrational decisions driven purely by emotions are leading to much shorter lifespan of men. I think that this "rational men" stereotype bring more harm than good, even though in theory it is favorable to men.

nsfw_trapsarentgay · 2024-02-27T16:30:41+00:00

That women aren't in competition.

High tier women KNOW that low tier women are going to muddy the waters and they want it that way.

"Not all women want a hot guy." Says the 4/10.

So now the 10/10 woman gets to keep shopping.

"Where are all the good men?" Says the 3/10.

The 9/10 gets to keep being hypergamous and sleeping around, joins only fans and gets 100k in 6 months.

"Women aren't just sleeping around!" Says the woman who can't afford to.

High tier women know they are abusing not only men but OTHER WOMEN because it's a competition for status. And there is NOTHING women can do about it, other than blame men. "Men are gross for being attracted to her."

"Shes petite and hairless, not like real woman like Bertha. Men are pigs."

"I think body hair is sexy because I'm too lazy to shave. Men who don't like it are gross, even if they manscape, trim and shave themselves."

It's blaming men for not scraping the bottom of the barrel because women can't compete. And if they COULD compete they'd be showing off their accolades not trying to handicap the playing field to lower men's expectations.

DarayRaven · 2024-02-27T12:44:43+00:00

What do you feel is the biggest misconception about your gender that gets posted all the time?

That men are hypergamous

apresonly · 2024-02-28T00:17:16+00:00

the idea that men and women are equally moral is absurd to me. i actually don't even buy that the men who say this really believe it. though i 10000% agree evil women, female predators, abusive women, etc exist, i just think when you average it out w the general population women are wildly more moral than men, due to how men and women are socialized differently (not biology).

Elliejq88 · 2024-02-27T17:08:46+00:00

By far that women find average men unattractive. Seems to be the basis for a lot of woman hatred and this assumption is wrong.

The vast majority of people end up with their looks and socioeconomic match. The vast majority of people fall within the realm of average.

CryptoThroway8205 · 2024-02-27T21:53:04+00:00

I think people don't know what it means to be masculine. If you asked people to define it people would say it'd be lifting weights, chopping wood, and fixing cars or plumbing/electricity without hiring an electrician.

It's more biological. We want our kids to succeed so raising kids and providing are masculine traits. There's a belief that men today are weak(emotionally) but they're spending more time with their kids and I think that just means they're returning to a natural behavior like their ancestors who undoubtedly helped raise the kids in their tribes.

I used to grapple with whether KPOP stars were too feminine and whether they were a positive portrayal. Most people in the west still consider them effeminate because of their slim but fit bodies. But Korea is considered very patriarchal and these guys despite their weight are able to provide and are very responsible working long hours with few vacations. Perhaps there's more to being masculine than being bigger and a better fighter in a society where lifting an air conditioner and shoveling snow after your snowblower has done the hard work are the extent of your physical needs.

I'm not supposed to answer for women but I think this idea that women shouldn't work because tradition is wrong. I've recently read a good idea that women have always worked. In hunter gatherer society women were gatherers. In agrarian societies they were tilling the fields and harvesting when not raising a baby. This idea of a single provider income only lasted for a while after industrialization among wealthy families where women could afford to be sahm, and where only men could be paid and ended some time after World War 2.

Realistic-Chest-6002 · 2024-02-29T05:54:04+00:00

A lot of women seem to think that men are just magically immune to any kind of threatening behavoir. But in reality men are more likely to get murdered, robbed, or physically assaulted by strangers.

Stuff like "I wish I was a man so I could go walking alone at night." Like sure, we aren't nearly as likely to get sexually assaulted, but that's about it.

KorinTowerFreeloader · 2024-03-01T08:07:22+00:00

Men are shallow, and women are not. Bullshit. Women are more shallow and care about looks more than men do. A 5/10 man will happily date a 5/10 woman. A 5/10 woman will only look at 8/10+ men. The only exception is when she gets run through, older, etc., but then, by definition, she is not 5/10 anymore. Also, that would be simply a woman looking for a betabux, not someone she respects.

Gender misconceptions

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Title	Gender misconceptions
Author	spanglesandbambi
Upvotes	17
Comments	360
Date	February 27, 2024 12:05 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1b1a9al/gender_misconceptions/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/gender-misconceptions.1246587 https://theredarchive.com/post/1246587