The text that started it all … this is when I learned what gaslighting was …

Aina98 · 2021-07-18T12:49:50+00:00

You don't get it. He watches porn to study human anatomy. No jerking off here.

LaTaina87 · 2021-07-18T10:24:22+00:00

After I discovered he had FOLDERS of the women he had filmed himself with having sex (lots of folders on his laptop!) and then finding his filthy tablet filled with more porn and a secret “chaturbate” account … he had been tipping girls to watch them but always denied having extra money to take me on dates, buy things for the apartment, or even buy himself fucking underwear! He always did this … I’m so happy I’ve been free from this “man” for a year now. I’ve felt like I’ve taken full breaths again since he left! Be safe ladies …

IAteTheDragon · 2021-07-18T10:36:05+00:00

A. S. T. E. A. M. 🚂

ShieldMaidenLagertha · 2021-07-18T10:33:40+00:00

Fuckin’ Jared.... 🤣

🤡: SeLf AsTeAm

throwaway88043468 · 2021-07-18T12:18:37+00:00

"Self -asteam" oh my God lol I can already tell you were(are) profoundly out of this man's league. It's crazy, all the goodness men will throw away so they can clutch their fucking porn.

Repulsive-Ad1092 · 2021-07-18T14:37:52+00:00

“You’d be more attractive if you didn’t have issues with porn” 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

happytoll · 2021-07-18T13:37:43+00:00

He doesn't watch porn - just creates it.

The term LVM doesn't suit him and neither does NVM - he is the definition of adding negativity to your life, maybe for years to come.

Can we add the term TVM - Trauma Value Men?????

Taping someone without their consent with high probability of putting it on a porn site he "doesn't jerk off too" - is super traumatizing. I don't think some of them consented to sex either.

Lavender_flow · 2021-07-18T10:33:02+00:00

Proud of you. What a loser. He is absolutely disgusting. 🤢🤢🤢

pqrsthrowawayyyyy · 2021-07-18T11:26:18+00:00

“Bye Jared” needs to be the new “Bye Felicia”. It’s a wonder to me how Jareds are almost invariably little dipshits.

GoddessIxtab · 2021-07-18T12:39:20+00:00

Can we take a second and talk about the weak argument that is: "it's because of your insecurities you don't want me to x"??

Because correct me if I'm wrong, but insecure people tend to let others walk all over their boundaries, and then make excuses as to why... People who are insecure certainly don't make demands. I see this narrative from a lot of redditors and it's so dumb..

Nadaleenatasha · 2021-07-18T12:54:42+00:00

Bye Jared

ello-motto · 2021-07-18T10:25:52+00:00

I already knew he was a LVM with that grammar, punctuation and spelling. 😬

Good on you girl. More men need to be rejected based on their porn-sick habits. We are not coddling these losers anymore. They get so defensive about their jerking they need to twist it and blame real life women over the ones that don't even know they exist.

hopeful_flounder93 · 2021-07-18T14:17:20+00:00

"tHiS iS sO dOuBlE sTaNdArD"

Jared's high "self-asteam"

warinmymind94 · 2021-07-18T11:01:58+00:00

Gaslighring of that dumpster fire made "a steam" lol. Jared is a huge LVM glad you saw your worth and we welcome you here. You deserve so much better.

complex_answer_22 · 2021-07-18T16:47:01+00:00

This is why I fully advocate digging. We have intuition ladies, and if you feel like something is off, it probably is.

honeybadgerattitude · 2021-07-18T20:42:37+00:00

I really think we need a website, something like dontdatehim.com where women can search for names, pictures and locations of men they’re potentially dating to make sure they’re not worthless pieces of 💩

Superb-Cancel9071 · 2021-07-18T11:24:04+00:00

100% he was jerking off every time, unless he couldn't get it up.

mamadgaf · 2021-07-18T17:53:56+00:00

Woooooowwwwww. “I watch porn because of my low self-esteem but if you felt better about yourself you wouldn’t care.”

I dated a man who had a porn addiction. I didn’t know, I found out after he moved out and was packing his things (I literally threw him out and wouldn’t let him back when he faked a heart attack to try to get me to let him stay so I left him at the hospital and didn’t let him back into the house). He lied about how much he made and hid money from me. Let me pay for everything for over a year while I was struggling over ending my abusive marriage. Later found out through my oldest that he was watching porn on the couch in the living room while sitting across from me. WHO DOES THAT? I would wake up and he wouldn’t be in bed and he would be outside having a cigarette (I will never date a smoker again) and watching porn (figured this out through bank and phone records). Well, watching might not be accurate, he was paying for cam girls, what little but I found it looks like he would pay for pics and videos and also to chat. Meanwhile I was practically BEGGING him for sex. He was barely interested and rarely could stay hard for very long anyway.

When I found out about the porn, everything made sense because he acted like an addict but he wasn’t using drugs or a drinker. Even when I contacted his family about him needing to leave, they asked me over and over again if he did drugs. He wasn’t working by that point (of course not!) and I sure as hell wasn’t buying him drugs.

He was such a mess, last time I heard he was still in a homeless shelter (a “residential facility,” which is a longterm homeless shelter with programs to help adults get back on their feet - most of these adults were abused as kids and addicted to drugs). It’s been more than a year and he’s still unemployed without even an apartment. The few times we texted (I have since deleted and blocked him), it was a new sob story about how he “has to come to terms with how much (he) hurt everyone…” blah blah blah POOR HIM. And I partially bought into it, assuring him he was a good person! Ah, my pickme days! At least I had to good sense to stop there.

Lavender_flow · 2021-07-18T10:35:03+00:00

Self a steam 😂😂🤏🤏🤣💀 im dead

__kamikaze__ · 2021-07-18T18:19:29+00:00

“If you owned what you got”…. Love how he blames it on her. The problem is you JARED 🤦‍♀️

pinkflorist · 2021-07-18T11:47:22+00:00

“Self-asteam” 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

4evaneva · 2021-07-18T11:58:45+00:00

asteam 😂

arnezuara · 2021-07-18T11:25:43+00:00

How did you manage to snoop on his laptop? Tell me because I’ve never done it to anyone (maybe I should’ve, who knows what my ex was hiding).

PinturaMagnifica · 2021-07-18T16:38:51+00:00

What is it with dumb as shit, NVM named Jared?? 😂

Big-Respond8481 · 2021-07-18T17:16:37+00:00

Double standard, but wants to force her to have a relationship with him when she isn't interested anymore.

thatjimmylove · 2021-07-18T17:24:28+00:00

Bye Jared is now my energy for the rest of the year, good job!

Nephelaei · 2021-07-18T11:45:06+00:00

Self-asteam LMAO

StrategyEven · 2021-07-18T11:54:38+00:00

He can't even spell esteem. Shame.

lvoncreek · 2021-07-18T13:53:28+00:00

ASTEAM

Princess_Vegeta_ · 2021-07-18T16:27:39+00:00

“Bye Jared” 😩🤣

Yellowsunflowerlover · 2021-07-18T18:57:18+00:00

Scrote should be embarrassed of himself, he can't even spell and sounds like a porn addict 😬

MissIncongruousNY · 2021-07-19T00:17:37+00:00

ASTEAM. I actually vet men for spelling. Typos are fine. But if they say “how are u” or “cus that is what I want” or can’t spell esteem or other important words, it’s an automatic block from my end!

sleepysiri · 2021-07-18T17:23:20+00:00

every phone comes with an autocorrect, there’s no excuse for self ASTEAM 😭

miwamus · 2021-07-19T00:31:05+00:00

He's the guy that reads Playboy "for the articles."

Equal-Ear2312 · 2021-07-18T19:54:41+00:00

Bye Jared 😂😂😂😂😂🤧

purasangria · 2021-07-18T22:09:53+00:00

"Asteam?" I cringe. These mantrums all sound alike.

Also: Refuse to argue over text; it's not productive. Makes for good screenshots, tho. 🤣

Watzoo · 2021-07-18T13:54:07+00:00

He’s a little confused, isn’t he? Jerking off is normal human behavior for both genders. Porn is not.

onceuponasea · 2021-07-18T16:58:29+00:00

Asteam, duh

Angrboda229 · 2021-07-18T15:42:22+00:00

As a creative writer, his texting hurts me. I can't date someone who can't spell correctly or use proper grammar and punctuation, unless it has already been proven you can actually spell and are just using shorthand.

It directly correlates to someone's level of intelligence as well as emotional development. Look it up like I do or just don't speak to me at all. Why are men so comfortable with being stupid and low effort? We all take the same education levels to a certain point.

I always like to see examples of gaslighting in real life. It helps to put things into perspective how subtle or explicit it can be. Some women just don't see certain manipulations or choose not to see. It's such a part of most men's dialect to openly manipulate women that they feel no remorse doing it, except when it's done to them then they get angry at being treated "unfairly".

swaylyn · 2021-07-18T15:35:52+00:00

Low self -asteam

I…can’t get past that. ASTEAM

Does… autocorrect hate him or?

platinumprimarina · 2021-07-18T17:11:43+00:00

Self ASTEAM though 🙃

Aik2 · 2021-07-18T18:50:52+00:00

"self -asteam"

camille_san · 2021-07-18T22:09:02+00:00

Self-ASTEAM 🤣🤣🤣🤣💀

TumbleweedForeign699 · 2021-07-18T22:22:45+00:00

Self asteam 💩

whatevertoton · 2021-07-18T22:48:44+00:00

Self-asteam. Enough said. 🙄

whenthingsconsidered · 2021-07-19T01:33:30+00:00

what the f is self-asteam? Scrotes can't spell

Party-Promise-8840 · 2021-07-19T03:49:36+00:00

“Bye Jared” 👏 That was great. 😆😆😆

mynameisrominka · 2021-07-18T15:35:16+00:00

Ewww this dude

Sister_cat · 2021-07-18T18:09:12+00:00

All i can say is asteam

MeanCow6 · 2021-07-19T10:18:27+00:00

If there are any HVMs named Jared out there, I feel sorry for them now.

VividPsychology7 · 2021-07-19T10:25:46+00:00

“Self-ASTEAM” 🚂🚂🚂

😂😂😂😂😂😂

radsera99 · 2021-07-19T11:07:35+00:00

Lmao ‘if you owned what you got’ shut up coomer

Salt_Satisfaction · 2021-07-20T02:27:42+00:00

The texts were good but what made me cackle was his last message. It makes him sound like a kid.

Title	The text that started it all … this is when I learned what gaslighting was …
Author	LaTaina87
Upvotes	1186
Comments	155
Date	July 18, 2021 10:19 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/omnxu5/the_text_that_started_it_all_this_is_when_i/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/the-text-that-started-it-all-this-is-when-i.793398 https://theredarchive.com/post/793398

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