Why are pick me girls criticised?

VictoriaSanford0 · 2021-09-24T19:17:10+00:00

Same reason simps/white knights are criticized. They often go against the female imperative to impress men and rarely end up with those men in any meaningful way anyways.

Cuntwaffe2 · 2021-09-24T19:11:23+00:00

To me, a pickme is someone willing to throw other women under the bus to get the attention of a man. It's embarrassing, but of course it sounds good to you.

quiturbitchn · 2021-09-24T19:13:50+00:00

A pick me girl is a girl who adapts her entire being to appease the man she is with. She has no personality or interests of her own. Sometimes she may nefarious intentions of just getting money from a guy. But bottom line pick mes aren’t genuine or authentic they change like a chameleon to whatever man gives them an ounce of attention

wtknight · 2021-09-24T19:13:21+00:00

Being a pick me is an invitation to being used. Some men won’t take advantage of a woman like this, but most probably will.

Dapper_Art_8269 · 2021-09-24T22:55:03+00:00

Pick me is not the same as a normal, loving woman who cares About her man but also about herself.

Pick me is a doormat.

CFinCanada · 2021-09-24T19:38:35+00:00

A PickMe girl says they are "not like other girls" (tm) and puts down women in general as a way to set themselves apart. They're self-loathing and have no self-respect. Men sense this (I mean, they advertise their desperation for male approval) and walk all over them. They are extremely likely to be cheated on or abused.

milkyymochii · 2021-09-24T22:36:42+00:00

What a lot of simple minded males cannot wrap their little heads around is that women are not jealous of pick me’s.

Any time this topic comes up, males are foaming at the mouth to say “women are just jealous of pick mes!!” which couldn’t be further from the truth.

Majority of women go through their OWN pick-me phase. If being a pick-me is so great then we would stay that way. A pick-me is a woman with low self esteem who bases her worth on male validation. She will throw women under the bus, gladly partake in misogyny, claim to be “not like other girls”, and generally just be an embarrassment.

Its very demoralizing and super easy to be taken advantage of. Beta males love pick-mes because thats probably one of the only times they can flex real social/relationship power. Pick-mes are pushover women who are easy to use, abuse, degrade, and control. The fact so many males desire this dynamic is very sickening. I wager all the males here would never want that for their daughter.

wateroclock · 2021-09-24T20:32:03+00:00

They think it's analogous to men who settle for single moms or sluts. That is, "pick me" girls are like men who submit to the other gender's "virtuous partner" fantasy.

moosemc · 2021-09-25T16:52:39+00:00

They're criticized by the FDS crowd. Basically for not making men pay dearly for every ounce of affection and attention.

Because the FDS crowd believe they have something priceless to offer. And they would like to tell you about it. A lot.

midwestufohunter · 2021-09-25T19:47:15+00:00

because people who prioritize being picked over anything else are dangerous to themselves and others.

as a kindergartener i reported being sexually abused by an older boy at the park to the boys mother.

i was 5, this is what i thought was the right thing to do.

she said "boys will be boys" and gaslit me about feeling traumatized by it.

I never told another soul for 30 years.

This is an example of how pick mes are dangerous.

ashleyrose56 · 2021-09-24T22:31:39+00:00

Because they are insecure, co-dependent and mostly mentally ill women who neglect their basic emotional needs and life to be chosen by any man. The important thing here is ANY MAN. They don't have any standards. If I was a man, I wouldn't see the value in someone who would date anyone who gives her the bare minimum of attention. They are also magnets for abusive and toxic men who will take advantage of them, because they don't vet men. They also take the men's role aka proposing to men, buying their own ring, pay for themselves while their are performing every feminine role: house chores, sex, "submission". They are the ultimate losers and it's sad to see. We critize them because we want them to wake up.

PlayfulLawyer · 2021-09-24T19:18:52+00:00

Well to be fair it is pretty cringe when some people try too hard and anyting, "pick me" girls included, but we know which type of people are doing the most criticizing and it's the feminist deception strategist group of people, if you as a man find a woman that you like that genuinely makes your happiness a priority, that's a great indicator that she's the right one , don't listen to them broads on that other site a lot of misery loves company lol

thetruthishere_ · 2021-09-25T00:11:27+00:00

Pick mes to me are women that let men walk all over them. Same thing for simps, they let women walk all over them.

Its how I personally see it.

SpanishM · 2021-09-24T21:13:45+00:00

They are criticized by feminists because they are dissidents of feminism.

BlackPorcelainDoll · 2021-09-24T23:52:53+00:00

The question is not "what works/does it work?" (because X does work - relative to whatever context) just like 'simping' works.

The question how it works:

Understanding the Pick Me, The Caring Woman, and the Distinctions: https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/ma4qqv/comment/grre5ah/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

The illusion is males inability to discern between the woman that 'prioritizes' his well-being over hers as a matter of goodness and habitual care above that of performatively deceptive women that prioritize the male for transactional benefit or to 'satisfy the female imperative'.

The pick-me is a woman that runs a series of performative, reactive or expectantly feminine traits/behaviors on 'males' to extort particularly of women that score high on narcissism, Machiavellianism as I predicted in this post.

Which comes as no surprise being linked to sexual deception: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S019188691930042X#:\~:text=Dark%20Triad%20traits%20are%20related,of%20deception%20in%20mating%20contexts.

Similar to thinking housewives are logically distinctly different from gold diggers due to habitually performative behaviors - when the latter is more overtly honest than the housewive that claims an innate moral superiority over the gold digger through religious magical-thinking with it's series of inexplicit claims and deceptive justifications based off incoherent magical belief systems.

Indeed, "Traditionalism" has always been worship of the woman - but men still feel otherwise; that there is an innate 'care for the man' in this set-up that is otherwise no less true than a modern gold digger in poverty.

I would count 'Born Again Christian Women' (or religious X-tian women) as a subset of faux performative femininity to extract gains to satisfy the female imperative (this may be why it is increased in preference in older women) that appease highly subjective moral standards from an unknown 'agent' called God, but the criteria in what determines objective moral conduct remains independent of faux performative morals - and the "Pick Me" is a dubious one at that.

JumboJetz · 2021-09-25T12:51:56+00:00

I’m convinced no one likes simple answers. So men and women come up with complex paradigms and counter productive rules in dating so unscrupulous people can sell eachother complex systems to follow.

FabulousFuchsbau · 2021-09-25T21:17:54+00:00

Because they’re female simps that why. They’re like the guys who believe women can do absolutely no wrong(can we please stop reinforcing this we’re people too and people do fucked up stuff) and will let a woman walk all over them with a smile on their face. I have no respect for simps of any gender.

OneAngryBlutbad · 2021-09-25T23:48:56+00:00

PickMes make horrible partners and even lousier lays. Why do I know this? Because I dated four seriously through the years or at least tried, the rest were just ONS and only six were passable enough in bed. With two it was like fucking a wet mattress, with the other three they were too fucking noisy and acted like we were in a bad porno(in my defense I was fucking one in a bathroom) and the last one gave the lousiest head I’ve ever experienced in my life. This is coming from a man whose wife accidentally scraped him with her teeth and did some damage. They have no personality to at least keep things a little exciting, they’re not blindly loyal like everyone assumes here they’re just good at pretending to be into everything you want and like because they can’t live without a man/can’t live without some dick. Intelligence is usually the absolute bare minimum or they’re complete fucking idiots who need to lead around like children, if you don’t constantly give them attention they start nagging you nonstop, if they give up their plans for you they’ll later blame you for it, if they devote their life to you they expect you to become their pet(it’s not the other way around contrary to what the knuckleheads here think) and good luck having them around any other women in your family you care about. They’ll try to micromanage THEIR relationships and their husbands/boyfriend’s when it’s none of their fucking business. So glad I broke out of this fucking phase in my life otherwise I’d be in literal relationship Hell.

TL;DR Get a PickMe if you want starfish sex, over exaggerated porno moaning, a blank slate with no hint of life behind their eyes, nagging, getting blamed for everything and being unable to take them anywhere without them starting some sort of drama.

Vyrnoa · 2021-09-26T20:15:08+00:00

Simple. Because they are insecure pushovers. They seek male validation to feel better about themself. Not because they want you to be special. It doesnt matter to them which mans boots they lick. As long as its a man theyre fine with whatever.

They put other women down because of their insecurity. They feel the need to compete because if they acted normally nobody would go for them.

So if thats your kind of a woman then go for it. But dont expect them to also be emotionally and financially independent. Most arent. Most are clingy and drain you.

Most of them have no original ideas because they change their personality depending on who theyre trying to please. They have no standards. No self respect. Which is why they often end up abused. Theyre the human equivalent of a wet piece of cardboard.

M3taBuster · 2021-09-25T02:55:38+00:00

Only women hate "pick me"s, and they hate them for the same reason you'd hate someone for outbidding you at an auction. Women who are willing to be subservient to their partners make dating more difficult for women who aren't. They are driving up the price of boyfriends and husbands, which makes women who aren't willing to pay that price bitter.

Personally, I think they're great. Hoes mad lol.

SoMuchForLongevity · 2021-09-24T19:11:40+00:00

Is she a simp for her partner?

That's the answer in a nutshell. People who adjust their beliefs and lifestyle just so someone will be with them are seen as rather pathetic.

MasterTeacher123 · 2021-09-24T21:22:47+00:00

I don’t want my girl to be a “pick me”.

vial_of_music · 2021-09-24T23:41:44+00:00

r/notliketheothergirls

hi_and_fuck_you · 2021-09-25T00:14:53+00:00

lmao because they're not compromising with regular guys. they're trying to compromise with shit heads or dudes way out of their league by being easy. these girls are called practice girls and regular guys wouldn't want to end up with thema nyway

SouthernGrass3 · 2021-09-25T00:57:33+00:00

People associate being a “pick me” with being a doormat, or coming across as desperate. Compromising is important and deferring to someone who has earned your loyalty is appealing to a lot of men , but acting like a doormat tends to lower your value in the eyes of the opposite sex and some men/women will see it as an oppunity to treat that individual poorly.

Im_The_Daiquiri_Man · 2021-09-24T21:26:40+00:00

FDS: A pick me is a woman who talks bad about other women.

Also FDS: Fuck all those non FDS women! They are useless trash pieces of shit.

Once again, the Free Dinner Society women have invented a straw man concept (see rape culture and toxic masculinity) as a catch all for whatever doesn’t serve them.

You shaved your 70’s bush so your man wouldn’t get hair stuck in his throat?

PICKME!

You watched sports with him and dislike rom coms?

PICKME!

You criticized Becky for cheating and said you don’t like angry feminists?

PICKME!

This shit is more transparent than Saran Wrap.

SaBahRub · 2021-09-24T19:35:50+00:00

Because they’re the ones whining, usually

It’s annoying, just like niceguys whining

“I did X, why didn’t Y result?”

goatismycopilot · 2021-09-24T19:51:40+00:00

I don't have a problem with the pickme chicks. Like if you want to go scrub your bfs toilet and number his socks on your days off you go sister. But the reality is if a hotter chick comes along pick me girl is gonna get dumped.

I think there is a bit of a tik tok or Twitter war between the pick me chick who advise women to cook homemade meals and let their loser boyfriends fist them in between gaming with bros on the weekend and feminist chicks.

Observing friends and co workers the pick me chicks are always the most disappointed by marriage because it is more of the same after a few years they are Ike shit . Of people I know, the happiest women are the wealthy ones, the bitchy ones and the single ones.

Pickme chicks are like potted meat after a few years.

vial_of_music · 2021-09-24T22:59:43+00:00

Ah yet another post going “pick me girls.. what’s wrong with them?”

Well just head on over to r/nicegirls for a small glimpse of why it’s not healthy to be one or to be with one!

Also, a relationship that spawns out of desperation is not going to be good one.

razormachine · 2021-09-24T19:35:10+00:00

Because they crash the value of other women.

Next!

insertcredit2 · 2021-09-24T19:28:50+00:00

The issue with pick mes is they're selling a false narrative. They're not going to continue to pretend to enjoy whatever they are lying about as it'll make them miserable. They will either out themselves and make you dislike them or they'll keep living the lie and they'll resent you for making them be someone they're not.

FatmanSlim93 · 2021-09-24T19:40:27+00:00

Because she’s the kinda chick to put out for anyone to get attention and will probably cheat cause she needs attention so badly. Having a gf/wife who’s somewhat disagreeable prevents that and makes for a better partner.

ameminator · 2021-09-24T19:41:41+00:00

In my opinion, everyone is most happy with genuine attraction, intimacy and a real connection. (Whether this is possible to find in our society is a different question). The only bad thing I have to say about "pick-me"s is that they may fake a real connection just to have a boyfriend - and it could be any boyfriend.

However, if everyone has genuine intentions, who could possibly criticize that. Some people legitimately don't believe that such a real connection is possible, and (in my opinion) unfairly attack such people who look for that and may make compromises for such a relationship.

sublimemongrel · 2021-09-24T19:42:43+00:00

It’s the same reason lots of Manospherians dub men “simps” and “betas” if they do things that are kowtowing to women

heyitsjeape · 2021-09-24T20:06:58+00:00

Where do you find these females you speak of? I don’t know of anyone ever waiting for me to pick them.

gimpgirl555 · 2021-09-24T20:08:44+00:00

What is a pick me girl according to you? Is she a simp for her partner?

This shows the Pick Me mindset:

https://youtu.be/f2KP9fYZUWA

JacobMoogberg69 · 2021-09-24T20:51:37+00:00

All women are pickmes with the right guy, lol.

AtomicMGTOW · 2021-09-24T22:20:28+00:00

The bitchy jealous entitled disagreeable women that want control hate having to compete with a cooperative agreeable submissive woman cuz they'll lose every time.

I think this is exactly why the word slut was created. I believe women created the word slut. Back in a time when women needed men to commit to them they would withhold sex until they got some form of commitment. How can they compete with the slut who gives it away for fun and free?

So women stopped using the word slut. What they did instead was convince all the girls to be sluts. They told me that it was good for them and that men were oppressing them if they were holding out.

monstera-delicious · 2021-09-24T23:18:14+00:00

For me a pick me is a woman who has no self respect and does anything and everything just to get a man's attention. I was a pick me so I know from experience.

It's pathetic and it's not an indicator of good self esteem. A pick me is a doormat to men and no one actually commits to her because as said before, she has no self respect.

just_a_place · 2021-09-25T00:08:04+00:00

Because they have enthusiasm for pleasing men and other women hate that because they feel that these girls are ruining the game for them.

The type of behavior a typical pickme displays is usually agreeableness, charm, enthusiasm, and seeking men's validation and display joy, pride, and comfort when men give them their time.

Personally I really love pickmes and I believe we should validate them more and give them respect and kindness for their effort, it would be so easy to fall in love with one.

Physiologist21 · 2021-09-25T05:36:37+00:00

If you saw photos of "pick mes" vs the people insulting them you would understand instantly.

Their profiles work just as well though really.

Miserable_Yam4778 · 2021-09-24T19:56:30+00:00

Pick mes generally don't actually make good partners because they want "a man," not you specifically. RP men talk about wanting genuine desire, but to the pick me, whatever man she has in her clutches is a placeholder, a prop in the fantasy she's created about the life she's living.

And what's rarely discussed is the backlash you'll experience when you fail to play your role in her make-believe.

lilybeth_luna · 2021-09-25T03:09:46+00:00

It’s just an insult feminazis use to shame women who don’t think they’re victims of patriarchy and are willing to not be a bitch 24/7. Bitches just mad they won’t get picked.

cuckspace · 2021-09-25T01:52:38+00:00

Why do women hate on the most beautiful woman in a social setting, call her a slut, call her stupid etc.? Because she has something they don’t have and they want to eliminate the competition. A slut deflates the price of sex. A beautiful woman makes other women seem bland in comparison. A pickme might lower men’s tolerance for the crap that average women throw at them.

xQueen-Bx · 2021-09-24T19:44:06+00:00

https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/e24974/pick_me_and_cool_girl_are_just_the_new_slut_in

IcarusKiki · 2021-09-24T20:03:47+00:00

We hate the most in others what we see in ourselves. Most women who complain about pick mes were former pick mes or current pick mes that don't like when other women steal their thunder.

chalkandapples · 2021-09-24T21:10:32+00:00

I'm a bit conflicted by the definition of a pickme. To me, it's a gradient of how much you're willing to sacrifice to make the other person happy. You can do it a healthy amount, which is great in a relationship. But I feel like when people say pickme, and simp for guys, they're usually thinking about someone that goes too overboard on it and is just being a doormat and taken advantage of.

What is too much is also different for each scenario. You can do a lot for your partner, but it's ok if he does a lot back for you. The same amount of effort could be considered too much if your partner is not reciprocating.

Sharp_Slide6806 · 2021-09-24T21:49:39+00:00

The FDS women are not the type of woman you want to be associated with. They are like a somewhat-decent looking librarian that thinks only in philosophical terms and generally plays on fervent bitch mode. You don’t want one of these self proclaimed high value womans. They are sort of like incels but they are attractive enough to get some attention, but you’ll end up in a jam.

Go for the pickmeshas. Those are the biological women that understand society and will make you happy.

NUKE_DEMOCRACY · 2021-09-24T22:46:15+00:00

same reason dudes criticize simps, beta orbiters, thirsty guys, etc

parfaitimme · 2021-09-25T10:00:47+00:00

They're just funny cos more often than not they don't even get picked despite all the effort. They do get used though, sometimes for years (see "forever gf"). Some do get married to losers and end up on Reddit asking people how to make their hubby stop paying for OF and playing videogames while she's working three jobs and doing all the chores and childcare. Maybe that's success for them, idk

grand_tiremaster · 2021-09-26T19:26:52+00:00

I've been called a pickme MANY times, by other women, simply for being conservative, blunt, having a crude sense of humor, and for having opinions that aren't very popular. I am not a pickme. If all the men in the world turned leftist my opinions would not change to pander to them. I think the pickme thing is actually rather misogynist, it implies that anyone who isn't a FDS extremist, can't think for themselves pretty much. Internalized misogyny coming from women who claim to be against that stuff.

A woman that voted for Trump? Pickme. A woman that actually likes video games? Pickme. A woman in male dominated careers? Pickme. Literally any woman going against the grain of what is seen as acceptable or popular, is a pickme. I'm tired of that crap honestly, it pits us women against eachother, instead of us coming together and supporting eachother, which is what feminism is supposed to be about right? Shit like that is why I don't like modern feminism and I frequent subs like the anti-feminist one. Me being there and conversing with men would make me a "pickme". Fuck off with that. Just let people enjoy things.

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Yokowi · 2021-09-25T13:22:56+00:00

I believe you can figure this one out on Your own...

upalse · 2021-09-25T15:28:50+00:00

It's the female version of "haha, what a simp", though there's more of slut shaming undertone to it.

xxshidoshi · 2021-09-26T13:53:11+00:00

Pick me girls enable toxic and sometimes abusive behaviours in men like gaslighting. They’re happy to bend their knee for anything their man wants like an absolute doormat. They don’t have any standards or self respect and they get no reward from their man as most the time the man is absolute lazy as she is expected to do all housework.

PopRevolutionary1475 · 2021-09-24T20:38:48+00:00

A pick me woman is a woman who is super bold in her sexual advancement.

Within 5 mins of conversation, she tries to bring me back in a secluded area to give a blowjob, handjob, or a quickie sex.

Then afterwards, she starts demanding my attention and time.

Why are pick me girls criticised?

Comments

Flexible to the extreme

Avoids explicit communication

Low self esteem

Misogynistic

Maybe Unfaithful

Mental issues

Title	Why are pick me girls criticised?
Author	Mark_Freed
Upvotes	33
Comments	494
Date	September 24, 2021 7:09 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/puqgak/why_are_pick_me_girls_criticised/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-are-pick-me-girls-criticised.1074532 https://theredarchive.com/post/1074532