do the people here actually observe the things talked about in this sub in real life or is it more about what happens on the internet?

thetruthishere_ · 2022-02-01T05:52:44+00:00

I feel like its another planet here a lot.

Do I think some of the things said never happen, no, its just not a norm.

I learned 'male nature' by 11 when 30+ year old men hit on me and my friends riding our bikes home for dinner back in the 70/early 80's.

Are all men like heck no but I didnt need a pill to know some men are bad. You dont need pills to know life isnt perfect and there are crappy people out there on both sides.

cvslengthbucketlist · 2022-02-01T02:32:10+00:00

I think the "equal value" thing is something you observe a lot, even outside of dating: people want the best they can get in exchange for what they can offer. Most of the time people of equal looks pair up because that's the easiest way to show your value, but it also explains mismatched couples because the less attractive person is usually remakable in other ways that aren't obvious. Also people can increase their value situationally and through luck. So "leagues" in real life actually allow more ways for people to move up than you would expect.

As for the other stuff it really depends on the specific topic you're talking about: different theories have varying levels of truth in them but a lot of the theories that people throw around in here are based on generalizations, very limited anecdotal evidence and bad interactions with the opposite sex. So I would take them with a good helping of salt.

logiauser · 2022-02-01T03:10:59+00:00

I have a close friend who is 5’3” and not the most attractive in the face. Watching him trying to date is just tough.

He’s a high earning, successful, hilarious, knowledgeable, all round good guy and he can’t get any traction. If he was just a few inches taller, he’d be doing OK.

It’s a daily reminder that when all is said and done, all the wishy washy language is just fluff.

Have another friend who is like 5’4” but jacked, full head of hair, and handsome AF. I thought this guy, despite his height could get anyone he wants. Yeah he gets all kinds of flings but no one keeps him around. Settled with a not too attractive single mom after getting tired of the circus.

This stuff is real and if you’re a guy, you see it.

Feisty-Saturn · 2022-02-01T05:10:58+00:00

I have posted about things I’ve observed as well as stats. Someone’s reality is not going to be the reality of the vast majority. So if there are stats that show what is happening more often, I don’t see why we would recognize that.

87AudreyHorne · 2022-02-01T06:02:11+00:00

i been reading some of the stuff and it sounds like we life in completely different planets.

Same, sometimes I don't know if people here are older or if Americans are just weird but I feel like many are describing some imaginary dynamics from like 50ies US? I don't even know adult women who are housewives!! And that word, "provider", my god...

And then the other part of it I think comes from online dating which is I guess where they see people put in specs about what they want in a partner which of course sounds kind of impersonal and lacking human depth because how could it not considering the platform?

I talk to people irl about some stuff discussed here but it's more like people having a discussion about things they read on line rather than taking it seriously. Most people by now understand the basic concepts but we all joke about it.

sootlord · 2022-02-01T11:04:07+00:00

Everything I comment on here is from personal life. After getting Red Pilled I dated alot and hung out with strippers for a long time.

The only "realization" I had is that all the women that had interest in me were single mothers and no matter how much I changed my game I could never get a woman my age or younger with no baggage (I'm 29 now for reference) Its frustrating.

If you don't have a certain look about you, girls dont want you.

MrMushySauce · 2022-02-01T02:38:53+00:00

Based on reading posts, a lot of people live in internet-world. I hear many people from both sides recite talking points like they're reading off a script and never gave it any thought.

Personally, I see a lot of TRP irl. That said, the real life version is a lot more laidback and sensible than the internet all caps rage machine. For example:

It's a lot more, "Brad turned into a fat piece of shit, won't work, and hasn't shaved in 3 weeks, so I left him"

Than it's

"Brad went from making $80,000 to $70,000 and his six-pack is now just a toned stomach, so I traded up for Chad who makes $200,000 and has a 12-pack."

onJuputerandMars · 2022-02-01T05:37:38+00:00

I don’t think it’s justified. This space pops tf off I was not prepared.

Ive never met someone that self identified with a pill color. I’ve never met someone going off about high value / low value x. I’ve come across some shitty people- mostly cis dudes. I’ll just continue to call it like I see it and do my thing away from all that.

flapperfemmefatale · 2022-02-01T06:48:06+00:00

For me, it's not even close. The guys I know who would (according to this sub's standards) be at the bottom of the barrel in terms of attraction are all married and happy. I know only two women my age who are single moms, and they're both in relationships, went to graduate school, and have their own careers.

I have to assume this is due mostly to socioeconomics. I don't hang out with people who do drugs other than weed, or have been to jail.

happy_petite_spartan · 2022-02-01T07:27:01+00:00

Never met a single person in real life who knows what these pills are. Personally, I don’t really know much about each and I don’t care enough to know

bison5595 · 2022-02-01T11:19:27+00:00

Our own experiences are anecdotal. That’s why the red pill relies on statistics. People will claim they have a friend who breaks all these norms, but most likely they are the exception, not the rule. I date interracially, but the stats say black men marry black women at an 83 percent clip. Statistically men are taller than women, so it’s impossible to have all these 5’5 men hooking up with these 5’10 women that people on Reddit would have you believe. 85% of stay at home parents are women, but women on this app will have you believe they would love to have a stay at home husband

Notanothrshitthrow · 2022-02-01T09:44:17+00:00

It always makes me laugh when a Redpiller backs up their views with "look around you, it's obvious!"

Yes, I have looked around me. I go to bars, clubbing, interact with mixed gender friendship groups and guess what? I don't see many of the Redpill phenomenas happening on any mass scale.

LowCreddit · 2022-02-01T03:01:41+00:00

We tend to self sort. Ugly single people drop out of beautiful people's lives by 35, usually earlier. It's like discussing the housing market for zoomers with my boomer parents. They still think most young men are getting jobs, buying houses, and marrying in their 20s. Their only curiosity is why more young people don't go to church.

If you want to know what real life looks like, go through your elementary year book and track down each person. Realize that this is the outcomes for your socioeconomic group. Life is a bit better for those above and much worse as you go towards poverty.

lonely_mixtape · 2022-02-01T04:42:02+00:00

Personally I have never witnessed many of these ideas in real life. At least not to the extent that many people on here claim and definitely not enough to consider it the norm. A lot of that might have to do with where I live and the kinds of people I choose to surround myself with and engage with. I wouldn't invalidate someone's experiences if they feel these ideas to be true in their own lives, but alot of them simply aren't real for me.

Generalizations never seem like a good idea to me, and it seems to be most of what I see here. I won't disregard that some ideas are true. Like being wary with people with a history of promiscuity is a good idea, or that women tend to like tall men. But there are always exceptions to these things and sometimes it gets taken too far. Not just trp stuff, but with all of these radical positions.

That's just my opinion, but I agree that some of the things I see on here appear to be based on an entirely alternate universe to me.

LiftSushiDallas · 2022-02-01T02:36:18+00:00

I've never had men inquire about my N count or what sex acts I did with exes.

I never had my options decrease as I got older. The QUALITY of the men I dated after my 20s was much higher than in my 20s.

And high value, professional men do care about a woman's education and job. Not specifically her income, but they are not dating a woman working at Arby's with a high school education. They would be embarrassed to bring her around friends. My man values my stability and that I have accomplished more than just being born with a vagina.

LalaTheSecond · 2022-02-01T04:12:58+00:00

Absolutely fucking not. This place is like watching animal planet.

Im_The_Daiquiri_Man · 2022-02-01T03:29:20+00:00

I witness or experience brutal RP truths every week.

I challenge anybody to go to a bar or club and not see this shit play out on any given Friday.

The same thing happens at any social gathering, just in more subtle ways.

RP hit home with me because of how closely it correlated with my life experience up until that point and how well it explained the cause and effect of them.

MsGoogleEyes · 2022-02-01T06:12:04+00:00

ok guys im going to go to sleep. thx for your participation and comments. i would close down the thread but i like what we have here. (also i dont know how)

im in the us so its dark so gn. dont let the bed bugs bite (ha).

BasicallyYogurt · 2022-02-01T13:05:33+00:00

Most people come here to try and defend team women/men as a proxy for defending their own life. So they'll say anything or have whatever opinion. Men are shallow, women have it so tough in dating, attractiveness doesn't matter, blah blah blah.

But if you're an regular guy in real life, not a bluepilled woke warrior white knight, or a loser internet radfem who frequents fds or PPD, it's clear as day how things work. No dumb strawmen arguments are going to convince them about bluepilled bullshit. It's like telling a guy the sky is green.

We all know a great guy with unfortunate physical features that struggles with dating. We all know the short guy, the ugly guy, etc. and the pain they have to go through realizing how superficial things are. You spend any amount of time on a dating app. You go to a bar. A club. Social gatherings. Same dynamic, everywhere.

PPD is a fairly useless debate sub because the biggest dating problems are really only experienced by one side of the population. Combine that with the inability for most women to understand men and most women here having a weird axe to grind, just leads to meaningless, circular, discussion.

LeadInfusedRedPill · 2022-02-01T02:47:36+00:00

Most people who come to TRP and decide to stick around do so because it resonates with many of the experiences they've had in their lives.

KingWhoCared86 · 2022-02-01T02:25:57+00:00

I’ve seen my fair share of pick up artists and examples of AF/BB. And a potentially dangerous incel in the mirror ever day. Lol

But on average, hardly anyone I encounter fit any of the pill definition. Just people getting through their days.

Platinirism · 2022-02-01T10:33:37+00:00

I’ve seen Autistic 9/10 tall white blond depressed Chad having two women who are literally strangers grabbing his arms trying to pull him out of his seat just to dance.

There’s only been two relationships I’ve personally seen where the man was the bad looking one, one ending in brutal divorce, the other they never have sex even though he wants it, because she “tried it once, and has no reason to try again”. Meanwhile she’s kept making excuses to talk to a particular bartender because he was hot.

The guy with the highest N-Count out of everyone I personally know is 6’2.

The men who are struggling the most in dating just so happen to be the guys who don’t care about their appearance (or was born unlucky, like being 5’5), meanwhile some of the most boring men I know have several women chasing them.

Personality is a meme. Focus on looking attractive everyone.

Gerpstarg · 2022-02-01T05:31:36+00:00

things i spotted in real life

skinny tall guys with short chubby chicks - all the time, women dont want their looks matches, they want more - a 5/10 chick wants a 7/10 guy and so on

as soon as a girl that likes you gets your attention, she looses interest, if you want her interested dont give her attention

as a guy better looks = more success, this whole "game" or "personality" is only a small fraction of your success, as long as you are attractive you can say anything and she will still like you

those a 2 ultimate redpill truths that i see in real life, first hand experiences literally daily

woke----- · 2022-02-01T02:30:06+00:00

People definitely larp it up in here but I’ve had guy friends who I legitimately can’t bring my female friends near for fear they’d make an ass of themselves.

ahandtoyourdarknessx · 2022-02-01T02:51:01+00:00

I think there is a lot of confirmation bias and using extreme examples. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who looks like a stereotypical Chad. I’ve seen girls say they want a guy over 6’ on dating apps, but I’ve also seen the same amount of girls say they only want black guys. So if being over 6’ is a requisite then so is being black.

I was behind a black couple at the grocery store today the man was really fit and he was an inch shorter than me and his girlfriend was about the same height as him.

Girls don’t like being ignored or treated badly. The guys who got laid a lot in high school and college were actually really nice to the girls they were chasing, it wasn’t until after they had sex that they became assholes.

There’s this red pill idea that women want to compete with other women but that never worked for me. If I tried to show off other girls I was talking to I got labeled as a player.

Now after you’ve had sex then it’s a little different because the girl is attached.

Also I think most guys are attractive enough that if they style themselves right they’ll be able to attract women.

The real problem is that these communities are toxic because it’s people getting all their information from other people in the same situation as them on the internet.

I think a lot of women are insecure and actually date down or they are scared of the chad types because they think they’ll be cheated on

Complete-Temporary-6 · 2022-02-01T03:35:42+00:00

Everything I talk about is based on real experience.

decoy88 · 2022-02-01T06:36:34+00:00

My talking points come from a range of sources

Anecdotal personal experience with dating (online and offline)
Anecdotal stories and opinions shared in my multiple social circles - this includes men, women, virgins, sluts, conservative sex-havers and the like
Larger sampled research on dating subjects - including marriage and divorce rates in the west (USA and UK), sexual partner count surveys, abortion stats, effects of class/income level on behaviours, studies about sexual behaviour by age etc

All of these combined to inform me that most people (man and women) are drawn to follow the path of least resistance, and do what they can to get by, with dating taking up from a small —> very significant part of their life depending on the spare time and adult has.

EDIT: Conversations and examples used in PPD primarily reference dating apps to prove “all dating behaviour” and social media to prove “all genuine opinions on dating” failing to see the issue with trusting these mediums.

Add that to a popular disdain for basic normie hobbies like drinking and clubbing, encourages the stereotype of basement dweller shut-in and possibly autistic

FilmStew · 2022-02-01T04:58:06+00:00

I think a big reason for any of these approaches is to really see what will happen long term and it’s a response to most relationships straight up failing.

At the end of the day, most talking points are predictions.

jasonology09 · 2022-02-01T08:58:14+00:00

I can only go off my own experience. I'm not tall, not rich, not famous, not very good looking, and not white. Given those traits, according to the pill-truthers, I should be a kiss-less virgin, destined to a life of celibacy and loneliness. But that hasn't been true at all.

I'm sharing some of my own experience, not to brag or as some kind of flex. But to illustrate my greater point. I've had all kinds of relationships with all kinds of women; long-term, short-term, casual, fwb, etc. I've been consistently sexually active since I was in my teens, and have had a wide variety of relationships with women who looks-wise, were way out of my league. I've also seen guys in my social circle, who are in every way just average, have similar or greater success dating and sometimes even marrying great women.

Given my experience(s), and those of my peers, what's more likely here? That I am some kind of outlier that has just been extremely lucky for the past few decades? Or that just maybe, the whole "pill" thing is not the absolute truth, but a convenient way for those who have not had success to rationalize and/or avoid any responsibility for their lack of results?

I would never presume to think that I'm right and a whole community of people are wrong, but if I had to bet one way or the other, I know where I'd put my money.

pokemin49 · 2022-02-01T09:40:17+00:00

I realized this stuff in high school. I just couldn't articulate it. I remember there was this 9/10 blonde girl in my class, and whenever she talked to someone, they would practically fall to their knees. It was like she had some aura of splendour. She once talked to this group of chubby-faced average dudes, and it was absolutely painful to see the brutal mogging. On the surface it seemed friendly, but it was devastating to see the comparison. Like everyone could tell this isn't right.

odd_cloud · 2022-02-01T11:30:27+00:00

Ok, so some of my stories. In school and uni all girls liked several handsome guys.

A woman had her fun in 20s and is considering "more types of men" in her 30s.

A woman married a guy who was popular among women. Then she divorced and married a guy who had liked her in high school.

A woman swiped left on all men on tinder in her area.

One of my friends is handsome and constantly is dating someone, another one is not attractive and lost his virginity in his mid 20s with a prostitute. Also he hasn't had much of success since that.

I've seen women approaching handsome guys. It never happened to me or to my not handsome friends.

ZealousidealAd7191 · 2022-02-01T11:41:23+00:00

I personally have been making red pill observations since before there even WAS a thriving online red pill community. And the environment has only gotten more toxic since then

Apprehensive_Boat_70 · 2022-02-01T11:51:32+00:00

I have a big family, so when I was a kid i could observe the behaviors of many of my not so modest cousin, certain things that we see guys say about sluts here are true, although i had that way of thinking before even discovering this sub and the pill movements, not as strong, but my aversion to sluts wast there.

most of the things red pill talks about arent completely right, for example they say that if you re alpha enough, a slut wont cheat on you, the truth is a slut will cheat on you wether you re "alpha" enough or not, the only difference is that if she knows you wouldnt tolerate it, she will try harder to hide it from you.

Not all women lie about their past either, i overheard one of my cousins having a conversation with her mom and some other woman sayin " when I met my husband i told him that i fucked every guy i wanted because thats what i liked it" the guy still accepted it, super secure of himself like the cheap ass cumpdumpters that flood this sub say, fast forward a few years and she cheated on him with random douche in a club on a foreing country, her excuse is that she was drunk, one of my other cousins saw that and tried to tell him through facebook, but since the cheater had access to her husband's facebook, she deleted the message, ironic eh? Thats the only time i know she cheated on him, who knows how many other times she has cheated on him, but if the guy was "secure" enough of himself to accept her when she confessed how much of a slut she was, i guess he ll be secure enough to accept being cheated on a few times eh?🙂, Also she says she doesnt wants to grow old with him, she is already planning how to divorce him after their kids grow old, how do i know? I overhead another conversation of her. 🤷🏻‍♂️

Those arent the only horror stories i witnessed about the things talked in this sub but one of the many. Thats why i see through the gaslighting about the sluts that lurk around in this sub throw.

sernamedeleted · 2022-02-01T16:02:25+00:00

They don't have real lives. Complaining about the internet is all they know.

Perseus_the_Bold · 2022-02-01T17:36:38+00:00

I actually practice everything I preach.

Anyone who has to use Math to figure out dating probably has bigger problems in life than not finding someone to date. The spectrum comes to mind.

Ex_Machina_1 · 2022-02-02T22:01:36+00:00

I really feel lots of this stuff just reinforces itself. Its like the more people spend time talking about it on the internet the more they see it in real life.

I myself regularly experience the opposite of everything talked about here i really wonder if most people just have created fantasies they live out via online communities.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2022-02-01T07:22:43+00:00

The amount of women in relationships and married that I know cheat or that have directly told me they are down to fuck is pretty eye opening.

So yeah, stuff from the sidebar? Yeah. It is true and always has been.

The wall? Meh, partly true. It's not age alone. It's 1) the compounded effect of years of abusing the body and 2) men deciding to chase less as they grow older. Besides, if girls just want to have sex, it's an open buffet all the way until their 60's. And the ones bitching they can't find a partner were are always dysfunctional to start with but people just don't put up with them anymore. The functional ones are paired up.

AWALT? It can't be true. You can't generalize 3.5 billion human beings. But it's also true that women are not this angelical beings some of us idealized in our younger years.

If you're bald, chubby, round faced and short, you're fucked. Like super fucked. These guys are single forever. And their singledom reinforced their social incompetence which makes everything twice as bad. They are as hopeless as an obese girls thinking she's hot.

Zerofication · 2022-02-01T03:18:22+00:00

If a lot of sensible people agree on something, then it's unlikely to be false. So in the worst case scenario, the pills will be partially false and mostly true as they cover a lot of topics.

King-SAMO · 2022-02-01T03:43:14+00:00

In my lifetime, I’ve seen a fair bit of baby trapping, paternity fraud, and one rape accusation to which I am personally the alibi. Also, come on one of the basic premises of rp is that hawt dudes fuck more, who hasn’t seen that shit?

doenst mean that there are any real life justifications for nothing, though.

nemma88 · 2022-02-01T09:18:19+00:00

I can pick out examples of all the pills in my life, I'm sure everyone could if they tried to confirmed each pill based on experience.

We have pretty large networks. People will pick out one or two examples when looking to confirm X pill of choice, and skip over anything that doesn't fit, or when it doesn't fit they try and phrase what might be wrong and fill in the gaps with assumptions to hamster towards their desired pill.

I know short men who struggle I know short men who don't. I know men who need to be more assertive, I know men who need to be less. I know men who need to get out more, I know men who need to shower more. The highest n count guy I know is nothing like RP, though I think he could fit into a niche nerd chad role for blackpill.

There is no one size fits all dating advice. Purple pill is the way.

Jakes1967 · 2022-02-01T09:25:43+00:00

do the people here actually observe the things talked about in this sub in real life or is it more about what happens on the internet?

My wife believes, that women age like prunes, so you tell me...😂

CentralAdmin · 2022-02-01T13:37:30+00:00

Let me see. I knew a guy from high school who was crazy. Like he needed pills or he would freak out and threaten to harm himself and others crazy.

This dude was tall and good looking. He had a string of hookups and short term relationships. He would meet a woman in a club, make out with her on the dancefloor and fuck her at his place. Within a week they would be over.

This guy was more likely to breed than any other, more stable, kinder man that approached those same women. I met a few of them. They were not equally nuts. Not even close. They were looking for some excitement and found it in the wrong place.

Knew many young women who dated thugs and shitty men. They complain about them but they go back to them or are one of many girlfriends these dudes have. That girl next door in your middle to upper class neighborhood you are crushing on? She is fucking a drug dealer for free weed. So many single moms whose baby daddies are in jail...

Then there was the string of women who were in LTRs a friend was banging. He would find out later when their partners message or call him angry about what happened and he would have to break the news that she didn't say she was married or had a boyfriend. Dude was annoyed because he wanted a girlfriend and they never seemed to want to commit.

A woman I knew in her early 30s was dating a guy older than her. They were living together. He wasn't earning much. She earned more than him. What got to me was she would talk among her friends about finding a dude who earned 6 figures so she could stop working. She dumped the guy and never found anyone who could measure up. She was okay looking but overweight. Chronically single in her 30s. She thought the grass was greener. Meanwhile, it turns out the dude she dumped was fucking someone else anyway...

A different woman I met was also chronically single. She was in her 30s and figured she would be married by then. But no man was good enough. She turned them down because they were too ugly, too poor, not educated enough...she figured she was worth way more and just would not settle for men, some of whom were really not that bad. She overestimated her worth and got jealous of other women in her family who were married.

You can also look on the sub r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen for screenshots of conversations, threads, posts, dating profiles and articles about modern women overvaluing themselves, wasting their youth, practicing AF/BB, and becoming single in their 30s wondering why a rich, handsome, tall guy hasn't snapped them up yet.

wtknight · 2022-02-01T11:17:14+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Aldabruzzo · 2022-02-01T13:15:25+00:00

Yes. See red pill played out all the time in real life.

softdimple · 2022-02-01T11:52:38+00:00

everything that’s mentioned in fds I’ve seen online or witnessed firsthand. a lot of men like to think it’s toxic and just baseless “man hating” but if they were to browse the sub and try to understand a womans pov they’d understand it better. the issue is that men can’t do that, they love being victims and throwing out numerous whataboutisms.

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EstablishmentKooky50 · 2022-02-01T08:16:59+00:00

According to my own, personal experience the core claims of Red Pill are valid and accurate to a high degree in real life and online as well. Things like men and women have different standards and expectations, that the genders are equal in value and yet different, that life is best - relationship-wise - when men and women are complement to one an other, that hypergamy is a thing and it's not something to be shamed or to be ashamed of, that physical attraction and sufficient resources is a key for men to have more options but it is not a guarantee for a successful relationship.. That women love competent men who can lead and they will keep testing your abilities.. That none of this is a "straight jacket".. That the first person you must hold accountable if your life is sucks is yourself, that stoicism doesn't mean that "men don't cry" or can not show emotions at all.. That both men and women are equally perfect or equally flawed and no one should be put on a pedestal just for their sheer existence, that there is no "The One" who is meant to be for you but almost everyone has the potential to some degree to be a great partner. The idea that men should not settle for an LTR or family until they are financially sound....

I only wish i knew about these things in my early twenties.

FenaPugi · 2022-02-01T09:37:48+00:00

i been reading some of the stuff and it sounds like we life in completely different planets. im actually curious.

PPD is pretty much representative of the kind of debate/ diatribe you'll see in the House of Commons and/or House of Parliament minus the think tanks, political favours and lobbying.

In all honesty, this sub probably won't survive the incoming IPO but it would be interesting if a sub could try to adopt/ imitate house of parliament except it'd be solely for sex and gender issues.

Suck-Less · 2022-02-01T09:42:11+00:00

It’s real life that brought me here, so absolutely yes.

cryptothrow2 · 2022-02-01T09:45:31+00:00

I've seen every perspective work

KirthWGersen · 2022-02-01T10:17:01+00:00

I only talk about what I observe in real life (and the experiences other people have told me about).

This means all my comments and views and inherently subjective.

Since we are just a bunch of strangers exchanging impressions, I think this is far preferable to referring to problematic psychological studies, which are usually restricted to a subset of a particular social class and culture and/or do not replicate.

As a result, I think we should all have a bit more humility about the nonsense we spout here.

FizzleMateriel · 2022-02-01T11:11:34+00:00

I have a friend who isn’t ugly but has unattractive facial features, he had everything else women say a man should have except a ripped body (he’s more like skinny lean toned), and he had to settle for his girlfriend.

His girlfriend is a college student 7 years younger than him with a below-average face and she speaks broken English.

omegajelly200 · 2022-02-01T13:07:32+00:00

There is one that comes to mind.

One of the topics talked about here, like women showing indicators of interest in talking with a man, smiling, playing with her hair, looking in the eyes, etc are bullshit because the real, TRUE, FOOLPROOF indicator if a woman is interested in a man, is her willingness to follow a man.

Don't follow a woman. Women are actually very used to men becoming their puppies and orbiters. They will ignore these men while being a little bit annoyed inside while acting friendly in the outside.

Men like to make the mistake thinking that if they keep following behind a woman the woman will develop attraction for him. My observation is that it is not actually the case.

Instead of following a woman, for example, when she goes out for lunch, invite her instead to go for lunch -with you- and you walk ahead of her expecting her to follow you. Or you extend your hand to a girl, bring her out to a dance, and then isolate her from the crowd at a club and sit down together at a table instead of you sliding to sit next to her at a club and asking. "Can I buy you a drink?"

Not only is a woman's willingness to be isolated and follow you is a super-strong indicator of a woman's interest, it makes a man more charming and macho in her eyes as well. Look, there is a man who is confident in himself and is willing to walk away leaving her behind if she refuses to follow him!

Don't' chase women. Make women chase you instead, and if they refuse, next.

fikus_the_old · 2022-02-01T13:15:17+00:00

Online is more clear cut, but in general mostly yes. Too many examples of how society treats 1-4's and short men.

To be fair 1's and 2's women are horribly treated as well. They might get laid now and then but it will probably be a very degrading experience.

Removing the romantic and traditional bullshit from dating made it free market, and paretto rule and gross inequality go strong there.

Unwanted men having to listen how they are the oppressors (which is mainstream opinion now, it used to be other way around) makes them mad as hell.

One difference is that men are more dangerous as we show more solidarity to each other as a gender and we are more action oriented, which makes us more vocal about how messed up all of this is. And we all got greedy dreams from almost any media being produced in the west.

vivvienne · 2022-02-01T13:29:38+00:00

It depends on where you live. Liberal city in America with a bunch of young people, yes, I found it's often not much different from the topics talked about on the internet.

Karmanger · 2022-02-01T14:11:12+00:00

Yes, people live in different worlds and that is to be expected. Each City, County and state is different. Life in NYC is going to be different than life in Mississippi, I think a lot of people conflate their normal for everyone elses normal.

Also no matter how you want to dress it up and hide it, women and men live very different experiences. Those experiences also vary depending on location, a man who attends a female dominated college will have a different outtake on gender dynamics than a man who went to an all male college. A man who grew up seeing his mother abused, will have a different out take on gender dynamics than a man who grew up with two functional parents.

Caio_dos_Hack · 2022-02-01T14:49:44+00:00

my (20M) personal experience with escaping the blue pill behaviours is very illustrating.

in the beginning of 2021 I got dumped and screwed over by my ex, a tall, masculine, not bright and not attractive girl (who i thought i deserved at the time). entered a deep state of depression that was only healed when i started working on myself in different ways (making money, working out, hair grooming, buying better clothes, skin care…).

at the start, i would not have problem attracting some women, but it was always the ugly or fat ones and tbh, i experienced that for a while and this helped me get more comfortable around them and my self esteem got so much better… but at a point, i felt that my value had grew a lot and i could no longer keep seeing those women, bc it disgusted me.

started to party a lot after october, made some girl friends and started to get around 4 girls each party, and the cutest ones. my confidence went trough the roof, i didn’t even need to chase them, they would come to me… . they would say i had this fuckboi vibe, but i didn’t give a fuck, that’s what i wanted lol

i never tried any RP dating strategy bc i never felt the need to. i’m a very extroverted and outgoing person, but understanding the female nature better (in the RP view, which i not totally agree) made it easy to achieve my objective in the moment and now that is having fun with hot girls.

i no longer hookup with below average girls, don’t act like a guy who is scared to lose them, don’t show my feminine side as easily as before and i make them chase me purely by demonstrating my value subjectively.

mayoissandwichpus · 2022-02-01T17:05:38+00:00

I haven’t changed what I’m looking for or my value system even a little bit by reading this sub. I think I’m just curious about what other people think. I am a 6’5”, 10% body fat, college educated, trilingual, classically handsome, white, financially successful Man and I am totally geared for being in a committed monogamous relationship, even though I get offers and get asked out all the time by women. I could text four women right now that would have sex with me before sundown, but that life doesn’t interest me. I am looking for a woman who is agreeable, humble, loving, supportive, gives me lots of sex, is “attractive enough” and is resourceful enough that if I were sick or incapacitated somehow, she will be able to care for me the way that I can care for her, is gritty and brave. I don’t care how much money she makes, I don’t need her to “Impress my friends“. I don’t need her to look good on Instagram. I just need her to be a good woman. I’m 100% convinced that I will find my person, but there is no such thing as a soulmate, that to sufficiently humble and determined people cannot only make it work but turn it into something absolutely beautiful.

Loki433 · 2022-02-01T18:07:09+00:00

I’m young and I’ve been lurking here for a min but I’d thought I’d offer my two cents

I don’t really subscribe to red pill ideology because I think the community as a whole is kinda weird and I don’t really care enough to try and hyper analyze ppl like that and I think everyone’s different and humans are more complex than that so in general I’d describe my self as squarely purple-pilled

However, as a young guy with plenty of female friends I can’t help but notice some of the stereotypical “red-pill” stuff that they have described to me.

For example one time I was out at a bar with a couple of friends and my guy friends and I saw a women that was wearing something that flattered her ass very nicely. Our female friends responded to how we acted and we somehow started a conversation of what women look for in dudes. Every one of my female friends basically said the following

Height
Face

And that was it. Sounds a whole lot simpler and superficial than a lot of women here describe.

Another time I had a friend ask me if there were any women at my university that I liked/had a crush on. I showed her an Instagram profile of this girl in one of my classes. She agreed she was pretty and told me to slide in her DMs. I asked her how a guy should approach this and what he should say and she told me this straight up.

“Honestly it really doesn’t matter what you say. There’s no need for a clever joke or pickup line. Just say hey, because no matter what you say the first thing a girl’s gonna do is go to your profile and see if you’re cute. If not, we won’t entertain it. If yes, we’ll respond even to a hey or wyd”

Pretty interesting if you ask me.

Again these are just 2 my own experiences with my own friends but then again by nature of OP’s question your asking specifically for anecdotes

Ohmaygahh · 2022-02-01T19:26:36+00:00

do the people here actually observe the things talked about in this sub in real life or is it more about what happens on the internet?

Yeah. Every time I open bumble, hinge, tinder etc. I recognize the very same women out in the street, the train, the bars. I overhear the convos during brunch, see the DMs and some will secretly admit to the FWBs most keep.

And this isn't partime aldi cashiers, broke burlesque dancers or inclusive community outreachers.

These are doctors, lawyers, nurses, account managers, founder and CEOs of their own company. Heterosexual women like dick... but with so many caveats. And many will deny it.

Dance, monkey. Dance.

the-lone-squid · 2022-02-01T20:02:23+00:00

Ignoring the extremists on this sub I absolutely see all this stuff play out in real life. So often that i really can’t believe it’s even debated.

JumboJetz · 2022-02-02T05:52:44+00:00

People are very different so I havent seen one ideology working. The things I see on here in my experience being true:

Way more men actively do online dating than women meaning women have a much, much easier time getting interest and date offers and men struggle to get even a fairly unattractive woman out on a date in on,one dating
Rich men (millionaire or more) do better with women
Short men have a more difficult time with women

Those are about the only hard truths I see on here. Everything else is opinion.

No_Regular1586 · 2022-02-02T06:20:19+00:00

Wtf is white pill? Sounds cringe

chromie96 · 2022-02-01T02:44:20+00:00

I've observed it, yeah. But it's not all of men or all of women. Each gender is not a hive mind that all thinks and acts the same way. There is so much nuance to the subject that i feel gets lost on everyone that's hard core one or the other.

Initial_Chemical7121 · 2022-02-01T04:02:10+00:00

I knew two actual incels in HS but besides that not really

Title	do the people here actually observe the things talked about in this sub in real life or is it more about what happens on the internet?
Author	MsGoogleEyes
Upvotes	63
Comments	302
Date	February 1, 2022 2:13 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/shj98m/do_the_people_here_actually_observe_the_things/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-the-people-here-actually-observe-the-things.1098582 https://theredarchive.com/post/1098582

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