Let’s put aside individual experiences for a second and just look at the population level logistics.

At work:

• Equal pay
• Equal roles & duties
• Equal status

Then comes dating:

• Men are still expected to pay more (or everything) while courting
• Men are expected to plan, organize, and “give her the experience”
• Men must take the lead, perform, and prove their value

Then if you make it into a committed relationship? Equality is suddenly back on the menu. (Often men still providing more even if she's contributing).

We’ve removed men’s traditional upside of a stay-at-home wife who manages the domestic sphere, removed any expectation of female dependency, removed “men are the heads of the household”, but quietly kept all the traditional obligations for men during the most vulnerable, high-effort stage.

You can’t have “equality in everything” except the expensive, performative, high-risk part where men have to audition.

Of course men are checking out. Not because they hate women. Because the math doesn’t math.

And what’s actually happening? Men are putting their heads down and gravitating toward manosphere "self-improvement", grinding to be in the top 10% for wealth, status, looks. Why? Because once you clear that bar, you don't have to perform as hard anymore. You can be more passive. The dynamic flips. The hustle is front-loaded so you can finally opt out of the courtship grind.