Do older women have less value in the dating market than younger ones ?

jaansm · 2023-02-07T20:40:12+00:00

are you new here

EulenWatcher · 2023-02-07T21:18:35+00:00

Older people generally have less options dating-wise, because the majority of youngsters aren’t up to dating someone much older. Men can compensate with wealth and go a few years younger, but few will pull out girls in their early 20s when they’re in their 40s.

Having said that, what people prioritize ideally, i.e in a theoretical situation or when they’re asked about it, and who they go for in real world are often two difference people and sets of traits and there are studies in the topic if you’re curious about it.

Bekiala · 2023-02-07T21:20:13+00:00

Sadly some women say that they were hit on the most at 13 or 14. Ugh.

There are indeed people who like partners their own age. I want to think most people want someone close to their own age but this might be hopeful thinking.

PMmeareasontolive · 2023-02-07T21:05:00+00:00

So by "older woman" we mean a 22 year old?

No, unless the older woman is looking for a subset of men who are "HVMs" who want to date very young women. If our hypothetical older woman is looking only for that level of koality, she may be up against it. But is she really missing out on "value" tho?

With a few exceptions like the above, no, it is absurd.

MyLastBestChance · 2023-02-08T01:28:09+00:00

As an actual Dino-woman for whom “the wall” is a hazy memory…objectively yes, subjectively not in any noticeable way.

Think of aging as an effective filtering mechanism. The pool is undoubtedly smaller but the sorting process is far easier and the water is far calmer and clearer.

Looks still matter, a lot, even in one’s dotage. But…accomplishments, success, adulting skills also matter in a way that they didn’t in the hormone soaked twenties, musical chairs 30s and midlife crisis/newly divorced 40s.

That’s not to say that there aren’t immature , geriatric wanna be fuckbois, but they are easily identifiable caricatures rather than real contenders. They are the balding, paunchy cartoons in yellow pants making fools of themselves over 21 year old hostesses or the overly moussed, fauxlex wearing elderbros with absurd sports cars haunting college bars like the ghosts of hangovers past…bless their hearts.

There are also a fair amount of never married/no kids men. There’s generally a reason for that. They are best left to their own devices.

Thankfully there are also plenty of wonderful mature men who are reasonable, rational, attractive and capable.

Think of it as a welcome distillation. I have fewer time wasting distractions, plenty of viable options, and no real complaints 🤷‍♀️

22IsThisIt22 · 2023-02-07T20:55:10+00:00

Men are biologically programmed to be attracted to youth and beauty. Youth because it gives better chance at reproduction and beauty because it signals good genes, which means good candidate to reproduce with. So of course older women are less valuable. Was this meant as a rethorical question?

INFPneedshelp · 2023-02-07T21:23:20+00:00

But there are exceptions! I've met some lovely men who think crows feet are beautiful and find smart women who have accomplished a lot of things in life intoxicating. Dont let it get you down.

gofigure62 · 2023-02-07T20:57:15+00:00

Men, young or old will want to fuck anything. I'm in my 30's and the barely legals are obsessed with me for some reason. I find it disturbing. Early 20's seem to like me the most and I don't understand why because the feeling isn't mutual.

I've found that all ages of men from 19-56 are interested in seriously dating me.

As with anything, it depends on the woman. Whether or not she's considered "attractive", what the general population is like where she lives and how outgoing she is. Also depends on exactly what the man is looking for.

I've also noticed a trend of older women 40s+ seriously dating men 10+ years younger than them. I don't agree with it, but I've noticed more women discussing it online and in my social circle. I don't consider all of these women particularly attractive either. Sometimes I think it mostly has to do with availability. I've notice women in their 30s or younger don't actually go into public places and face to face socialize with strangers to the degree that older women do. Most of my female friends that are my age and younger never want to leave the house or do anything that doesn't involve someone else's house.

noafrochamplusamurai · 2023-02-07T21:17:33+00:00

If that's the same data that indicated that men were more likely to actually message women closer to their own age the answer is no

Flightlessbirbz · 2023-02-08T02:53:26+00:00

To men, women/girls peak around 12. But men don’t stop bothering women our whole lives, or even sometimes after we’re dead. So it’s a little confusing!

Mr_Chad_Thunderpenis · 2023-02-07T21:36:36+00:00

Younger women are on average more physically attractive than older women. Men almost always overwhelmingly prioritize looks. I mean this is a very easily observable fact in the real world.

SlyStocks · 2023-02-07T21:36:37+00:00

Obviously yes. Water is wet. Women like tall men more than short men.

BulletReaper · 2023-02-07T23:01:00+00:00

2 years makes a huge difference for women and 2 inches can makes a huge difference for a man. Ironic

Kinneia · 2023-02-07T23:51:39+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Sea-Professional-594 · 2023-02-07T21:35:39+00:00

When will we be freed from the shackles of this damn survey

Scarce12 · 2023-02-07T20:47:43+00:00

Yes, older women have less market value in the dating market than younger women.

However the average women is allowed to just be.

NotARussianBot1984 · 2023-02-07T21:05:21+00:00

Of course not, we're all unique snowflakes, we're special, and you can't generalize value across people. If there is a trend, it's just a fluke.

INFPneedshelp · 2023-02-07T21:21:21+00:00

Yes generally (though I hate using the term "value" when it comes to people) but as I always say, anytime you are rejected by someone who would judge you for being older, that's a good thing. That's not someone who would treat you well in a relationship.

Capeninja · 2023-02-07T21:30:26+00:00

As they age people on average grow less physically attractive, less sexually curious, and more emotionally jaded. Additionally they tend to come with more baggage, like children, annoying exes, or just the general pressure to settle down.

The reason men don't strictly decline based on those factors is because women like the experience, wealth, and status they gain over time.

But men are significantly less likely care about a woman's experience, wealth, or status. So aging is unfortunately basically just a negative for her desirability.

Believeinyourflyness · 2023-02-07T21:32:10+00:00

Ohyarlysmiles · 2023-02-07T21:51:41+00:00

Yes and no.

Relative to herself a woman loses value as she ages.

But relative to others is a matter of how hot she is and how well her looks keep up over time.

But, and I've noticed this as well, it's easier to be an older woman's best option, so they tend to be more attentive and nice.

Younger women hard push the fact that they have options into your face both in how they talk to you and how they behave towards you.

Which is why dealing with older vs younger women requires different skillsets.

Teflon08191 · 2023-02-07T23:17:13+00:00

And it's like the average woman isnt allowed to juste be.

I don't understand this mentality. Average (which I assume means "older" in this context) women are "allowed to be" just fine. They just aren't going to be considered as attractive to men compared to women younger than them.

You're framing it as if it's some kind of violation of "average" women's human rights that men are attracted to youth and beauty. Why?

bentandbest · 2023-02-08T03:23:06+00:00

Depends on the young woman.

A 50 year old woman in incredible shape with a sexy face has higher smv than a 19 year old fatty

WilliamWyattD · 2023-02-08T04:12:10+00:00

Men weight fertility cues such as neoteny and beauty far more highly relative to other criteria that women do. But while women weight a broader range of criteria more equally, they are also more selective overall with a kind of cutoff or threshold system. So it is hard to have an apples to oranges comparison.

Nevertheless, this does lead to women, on average, losing raw desirability to men at a greater rate as they age than vice versa. However, 'less value' on the dating market is more complex. Various factors work to constrain male choice to their own age range, including female preference, social pressure, and even men's own better natures.

So yes, women do lose mate value as they age, but not nearly to the extent they decline in raw attractiveness.

AmbitiousCamp5942 · 2023-02-08T04:39:00+00:00

Im 27 and my options have steadily improved with time. A lot of successful men want an equal. There's a lot less competition for me when success filters out most women. Meaning I need to be hotter than other women at my level of success, not all women.

Round-Relative-7859 · 2023-02-07T21:14:30+00:00

Every single man I’ve lately is not only younger than me, but when I say “I’m too old for you” they all say pretty much the same thing. They’re tired of the young ladies out there who play games juggle multiple men. They all want older women who are settled, know what they want, and don’t play games.

TheRedPillRipper · 2023-02-07T21:09:51+00:00

I’m not expecting smart answers

Either you’re asking in good faith, or not.

I thought mentalities had evolved

They have. Physically though? Is a different story.

Godspeed and good luck!

Round-Relative-7859 · 2023-02-07T21:23:01+00:00

Yes, women who get old lose sexual value, but don't worry, older women still have more value than most men and they know it. These women just hate the fact that the huge sexual power they had naturally drops by age. It is just power lust, power of influence that almost no men ever had, pure entitlement.

Karens are not annoying women, they are normal average women that have not got the memo they are older... they act as young women act, but they do not have the youth and enchanting look younger women have. They have not adjusted their entitlement.

Older women also get other forms of value, such as being moms, grandmas, and wives, but women who don't become any of that in the first place will not reap those benefits on social status, which makes getting old harder for them.

RealAmericanWeasel · 2023-02-07T21:30:33+00:00

I am attracted to females my age (40s) or in their 30s. They do not like me.

Short-Fingers · 2023-02-08T04:34:23+00:00

Due to porn and beauty products older women can still enjoy plenty of sex and sexual attention from men of all ages, including younger men. The more jaded she becomes though the less attractive she is, which is the same for men as well I’m sure. No one wants to date a jaded superficial person seriously.

Although harsh, the number one thing that lowers a woman’s value is her being a single mom, especially if it’s a mixed kid for some people. And the most likely cohort for single moms is older women.

Willow-girl · 2023-02-08T06:47:57+00:00

It depends on whether she retains her good looks and refrains from having children, particularly boys.

At 20, nearly all women are attractive, thanks to the bloom of youth, so a 20-year-old girl will have tons of competition from her peers.

Ten years later, that will no longer be the case ...

2023-02-08T07:01:38+00:00

When you put women right next to each other - what do you expect?

nemma88 · 2023-02-08T09:54:15+00:00

Objectively yes, though in practicality for most people it matters little.

SoldierExcelsior · 2023-02-08T15:26:23+00:00

Many men start balding at young ages I know guys who started loosing their hair in their 20s..but hair doesn't make the man competency dies do I care if the man next to me in the trenches us baldingor not hell no I care if he can shoot straight maintain his composure and keep his shit under fire.

Women just refuse to accept that males and females aren't the same and the world ask different things of us.A balding man can still be a competent provider and protector wtf does hair have to do with anything...and I say this as someone who has a full head of hair.

With that said men are visual we get hard and sexually aroused based on the appearance of a woman sex is impossible if a man isn't aroused men are biologically programed to be attracted to young fertile women it's a waste of our time to be attracted to women past their prime that can't conceive or have a higher chance if dying in child birth

All the feminist BS can't undue 10s of thousands of years of evolution.Imagine if men where attracted to 35 year old women 200 years ago all of these men's resources would be wasted on women that can't even reproduce or die trying its bad enough at any age but older women have worst odds.

20-22 isn't a significant difference physically hell I doubt I could tell the difference they both look like children to me at my age and I wouldn't take anyone under 25 seriously but by 25 Caucasian women especially start to show signs of aging because they want to stay out in the sun tanning...By 30 they look fairly weather worn by 40 it's a wrap.

If I had to choose who to take home for the night it would probably be the 20 year old in theory she should have less bodies and be tighter all around but I would date the 22 year old atleast we could have a drink together.

herinquisition · 2023-02-08T19:08:32+00:00

Imo, dating gets better in your 30s - I could include late 20s here as well. I think dating as a woman in a major liberal city in your 30s is arguably better than dating in your early 20s for several reasons. I think this myth of the wall is mostly true in more conservative areas and countries with overtly patriarchal and old fashioned views. Like in at least one Asian country, I've heard it's really hard for women to find relationships or marriage at 30. I can't remember which one though. They literally have parents putting ads out for potential suitors. Very different culture and I won't deny their struggle. This may be a large part of the world. It really depends on location though, as cultures and adherence to traditional attitudes will vary.

The average age for marriage and child birth has increased. I think now there are more first-time mothers in their 30s than the youngest women. The median age for first-time brides is now 28 for women in the USA, but some states have a lower or higher median. In NY, it's 29. In my home state, MD, it's 29. In Utah, it's little over 24.

https://www.prb.org/usdata/indicator/marriage-age-women/snapshot/

I think dating in your 30s is better because you may likely know yourself more and have learned more about the world and relationships. Young couples have higher divorce rates than couples who marry in the late 20s to mid 30s, and age gap couples have astronomically high divorce rates. So when (or if) we envy young women being oogled for their perkiest everything, we need to think about what there really is to envy. Once you get into the data, if you live in the United States and especially in a metropolitan area, the answer seems to be...well, not much. Young couples are also likely to struggle economically more, which means their children will have less accesss to good schools and lower quality of life. And even more interesting today is now, middle class marriages are starting to disappear. More educated women in higher tax brackets are more likely to get married and less likely to get divorced. Don't mean to be classist because shit sucks, but there's a correlation happening that should be highlighted. These "she hit the wall" mythologies are not only false, but actually can harm your life and future if you ever take that to be synonymous with "young women have better relationships, get divorced less, and have better lives." Research says that's a negative. There's even more research now showing that older paternal age is correlated with birth defects, issues in childbirth and even issues in pregnancy for the mother. So yeah...I'd think carefully before dating a much older man, but that's just me. Do you, spring chickies.

Back to dating in my 30s - I think your selection is generally better, imo, as you will have more access to a different caliber of men if you're educated and have a career, generally. And that's about depth, intellectual compatibility, financial success, etc. We like looking at young men too, don't get me wrong. I had opportunities with younger guys, but there are too many cons across the board on average. Older women, imo, will likely present very differently in the world and in dating, and could be more attractive overall to certain kinds of men, even if those men would have been most *sexually* attracted by 18 year old you (and that's not even guaranteed). I think that's the thing - people conflate interest in sex with interest in relationships. I believe there's one study (may be the same one) where even though men said the youngest women were most attractive, they were more likely to approach women closer to their age. A lot of older men have no interest in talking to a 20 year old. Younger, sure, but the youngest? For a lot of social stigma and actual compatibility reasons, I think a lot of the men many women would desire most wouldn't be interested.

Kaminaxgurren · 2023-02-07T20:50:17+00:00

Yeah, if the day comes in my mid thirties that I can actually be attractive to women, no way in hell I am looking for women my own age that I'm either already not attracted to or know I won't in 10 years.

Of course, that's just my preference, and I don't think I'd want to speak on the overall "dating market"

_BlueShark87 · 2023-02-07T21:15:52+00:00

Well yes, men are naturally attracted to beauty and younger women tend to look better physically. Men also tend to like youth for fertility and children. Also if a guy cares about body count, a younger woman usually has a lower one.

DiamondLilyD · 2023-02-07T22:50:28+00:00

Meanwhile men who are balding and getting frumpy are seen as having "charm".

Nahhhh just ugly and delusional lmao

John_Oakman · 2023-02-07T20:54:14+00:00

Different values, as older women tend to bring maturity and wisdom, things that while are valuable to like minded people, are negatives to those who want to take advantage and exploit others.

Reasonable_Volume_96 · 2023-02-07T21:16:28+00:00

lol - Men who find a 20yo more desirable than a 22yo (they'd only know their age on OLD apps) are looking for naive women they can manipulate. The older you get, the more worldly and learned. You gain wisdom and can see the 🚩🚩🚩 far earlier at 30yo than at 20.

That's what they want. To groom young women or to date them without the requirement of putting in the amount of effort they would have to with a woman 25+ who's brain is fully developed

wtknight · 2023-02-07T21:12:06+00:00

[permanently deleted]

ComfortableOk5003 · 2023-02-07T21:09:38+00:00

Asking question, not wanting answers or thinking the answers are bullshit because they don’t echo your sentiments is dumb af

Funny how you bitch about mentalities evolving but don’t address that by and large women look for tall men who are ambitious and well established, successful (usually making more than women) but that’s an old mentality too…

It’s a fact that women have a biological clock…so yes if a man is looking to start a family would it be smarter to look for a 30-35yr old or a 25-30yr old??

Men are hard wired to give priority to certain things just as women prioritize certain different things…deal with it.

Also would it not be logical to say that less baggage younger vs older

VasiliyZaitzev · 2023-02-08T19:06:37+00:00

I’ll let you peruse this and determine the answer yourself

https://www.businessinsider.com/dataclysm-shows-men-are-attracted-to-women-in-their-20s-2014-10?amp

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LoopyPro · 2023-02-07T21:23:34+00:00

In the dating market, yes. Youth is an important, but not the only, criterium. Men are hard-wired to appreciate fertility for their mating strategy. Men's brains are literally programmed to base something primal as sexual desire on that. The so-called peak age is around early 20s, after that it declines. Of course there's more than age. There are other qualities a woman could have that determine her dating market value (e.g. agreeableness, femininity, etc.)

Please bear in mind that dating market value and a woman's value as a person are completely unrelated.

SaucySascha · 2023-02-07T21:27:17+00:00

CLyD3_H3ffalump · 2023-02-07T21:43:01+00:00

You're more than free to just be, but don't expect men to still find you as attractive anymore. That's the difference, a younger girl can just be also but difference is she will nonetheless catch the eyes of all if not most men that see her.

puririnpa · 2023-02-07T21:51:05+00:00

looks>age generally, one can be 30 and look young.

Scared-Tea-8911 · 2023-02-07T22:10:35+00:00

Older women can have considerable value/pull in more niche markets. Just going on an app and swiping is probably skewed toward younger women, because there is such a buffet of choice available to peruse. However, if you are a member of a niche community or group, that will always help as members of niche groups can sometimes have trouble dating outside their niche.

I believe female attractiveness is supposed to peak around age 24. Anyone post-24 may have a bit of a challenge in terms of physical attractiveness, but will have the benefit of life experience to help round them out.

Additionally… physical attraction is not the only thing that matters. While a 20-year old in a particular context might be more “attractive” than a 22-year old, as long as you are over someone’s “base attractiveness threshold”, your personality and life experience is really what shines.

Hope this helps! 💕

Fun_Push7168 · 2023-02-07T22:49:26+00:00

The age chart here is pretty accurate IMO if we're looking at the general market and what happens.

https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2018/08/online-dating-out-of-your-league/567083/

Bear in mind they measure success by when people get responses and by how high rated the people they interact with are. This is not just sheer volume. It's success with those you are actually interested in.

UneastAji · 2023-02-07T23:22:46+00:00

For once a french girl post there but damn, you do not paint a good light of us.

You're a lesbian feminist separatist, why do you care about what men like in women?

I thought mentalities had evolved

Mentalities evolve, truths do not change.

mostly incels and pickmes

A 100% fit for you.

bluestjuice · 2023-02-07T23:26:35+00:00

I guess it depends on what is meant by “less value.” Are more men on the whole going to potentially be willing to consider dating a 22-year-old than the same woman at 32? Probably? Is the 32-year-old woman going to have a dramatically harder time finding a man she wants to date than the 22-year-old? Doubtful.

the_butter_lord · 2023-02-07T23:35:55+00:00

Yes next question

Electrical_Funky · 2023-02-08T00:24:55+00:00

Uh, yes

Its inarguable men are visual creatures. And in general, NOT FOR EVERY WOMAN, but in general the younger and youthful you are. the better looking you are

Purebredasianbro · 2023-02-08T00:27:32+00:00

All else equal yes. There was a study that for every year a women was over 30, she had to be earning 7k a year more compared to a 30 y/o version of the same profile

Aromatic_Shop9033 · 2023-02-08T00:46:15+00:00

Yes.

/thread

LowCreddit · 2023-02-08T01:12:33+00:00

mentalities had evolved

Sex is at the core of biology and evolution. You aren't going to change billions of years of evolved behavior with a hundred years of signs at bus stations.

Age is a tradeoff. Older women are typically better at being mothers, but less capable of becoming mothers. Women peak when their fertility losses begin overcoming their mental growth.

CLyD3_H3ffalump · 2023-02-08T01:17:00+00:00

Appreciate the ominous forewarning, when that starts slapping me in the face I'll have to make some changes. Till then, reaping the benefits of my MGTOW years.

Ohms2North · 2023-02-08T01:27:28+00:00

Nah. I prefer older, less attractive, bitter women

BohemondTheCrusader · 2023-02-08T01:28:45+00:00

Of course???

To expand on this;

I thought mentalities had evolved

What does this nonsense even mean? The only 'evolution' that controls what men find attractive in women is... evolution... which did not select for men who went after less fertile (i.e. older) women.

launcelot02 · 2023-02-08T01:45:43+00:00

Depends on what value you are looking for, but definitely not the same.

countofmontecristo20 · 2023-02-08T02:15:39+00:00

Op sounds angry probably not getting dates.

Adept-Unit930 · 2023-02-08T02:56:29+00:00

MotleyCrew1989 · 2023-02-08T03:30:09+00:00

Take two pictures of the same woman (one who allways kept the same lifestyle), when she was 20, and other when she was 25 and you will see changes, neither good nor bad, but still noticeable.

For example, the teen like waist is long gone by 25yo, just google Megan Fox in "Transformers 1" and five years later in "this is 40", still a beautifull women, but not with the same waist.

RX-HER0 · 2023-02-08T04:50:28+00:00

Well, I mean, yeah. It's just that women are generally prettier when younger. Is what it is - It's the same with guys, but only to a certain extent, because men usually have a better time aging and can use the extra time to generate wealth.

Lameador · 2023-02-08T06:19:54+00:00

Is water wet ?

OpeningInner483 · 2023-02-08T06:20:17+00:00

Older women are sexier, but a shorter fertility window makes them less desireable if you want kids

Ok_Scene_1799 · 2023-02-08T10:01:43+00:00

it's like the average woman isnt allowed to juste be.

yes they are when they are young, they got all the power, attention, value...

while men have to work hard to get their value.

so it's only fair that later men get what they worked hard, and women get what they didn't work for

beleidigtewurst · 2023-02-08T11:34:53+00:00

I saw a OKC survey that says that women who were 22 were already considered l'ESS attractive than at 20 which is insane

You got it insanely wrong.

Women of 20-23 were dubbed most attractive by men of ALL ages considered (which was 20-50 I think).

For women the figure was very different depending on their age. Oldest women opted for "-5 years", yougest for +2-3 years.

Top-Cry-5321 · 2023-02-08T11:43:29+00:00

Depends what the man has in mind - reproduction or just to get laid.

purplepillowed · 2023-02-08T13:20:05+00:00

I’m in my early 40’s and my ideal relationship range is +3/-5 years. My wife is 5 years younger.

My physical attraction range is probably 25-49. Sure there are attractive women slightly below or above that range, but I want someone who looks like an adult, not a child or an old woman.

The women I find most attractive are in their mid 30s. So, youth is attractive, but it’s relative.

Ok_Thought_1818 · 2023-02-08T13:25:36+00:00

In this thread: massive coping from women. Nothing new ofc.

asslite · 2023-02-08T15:00:04+00:00

I think young women have the largest access in the dating pool, and it does go down as you age, but I think it's more so filtering out men who target very young women. In a way, consider it a blessing.

caption291 · 2023-02-08T16:11:15+00:00

I saw a OKC survey that says that men who were 2 inches bellow 6' were already considered l'ESS attractive than at 6' which is insane but just goes to show 2 inches difference can really impact the amount of likes a man receives. Meanwhile women who are fat and getting lazy are seen as having "charm".

I thought mentalities had evolved but there are still surveys that show women like very tall men. And it's like the average man isnt allowed to juste be.

(I'm not expecting smart answers since this sub is mostly women and feminists but i'm still trying)

Healthy-Educator-267 · 2023-02-10T02:31:33+00:00

Older women are less interested in being on the dating market. But conditional on being in the dating market, they get a lot of interest, usually from men around their age or up.

2023-02-12T17:11:56+00:00

No but men who literally can't get a date will say yes

Physical-Pie748 · 2023-04-28T18:54:20+00:00

according to

https://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2015/07/03/ok-cupid-data-on-sex-desirability-and-age/

Womens Dating Value peaks from 20-26, mens dating value peaks from 24-32. And after 26 men always have more dating value. so yes, older women have less dating value than younger women if you believe ok cupid data.

Title	Do older women have less value in the dating market than younger ones ?
Author	Lavender211
Upvotes	24
Comments	311
Date	February 7, 2023 8:30 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/10wc8rn/do_older_women_have_less_value_in_the_dating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-older-women-have-less-value-in-the-dating.1151579 https://theredarchive.com/post/1151579

Comments

You got it insanely wrong.