If women treat sex as a reward, men should treat his money as a reward.

TopShelfSnipes · 2026-05-26T18:36:18+00:00

It's easier to just not date people who think of sex or money as a reward or as gold stars to exchange for the reward.

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2026-05-26T18:58:36+00:00

I’m so glad I am not in this kind of relationship and would never let myself be in one

Downtown_Cat_1745 · 2026-05-26T19:21:40+00:00

Ultimately, it’s better to be in a relationship that is not transactional. Like, if you have to ask someone what they bring to the table, you probably shouldn’t date them

Afraid_Fondant_7903 · 2026-05-26T18:58:20+00:00

Or date women who are sexually attracted to you and want to sleep with you because they are horny

Mindful_Insights · 2026-05-26T18:49:49+00:00

Men lose these arguments when women become self sufficient. He needs to hire the help he expects from his partner. She was never an employee.

Expensive_Lion1807 · 2026-05-26T19:01:38+00:00

So…you’re saying that men should look at relationships like hiring a mommy?🤣🤣🤣

No thanks. Keep your money and your mess.

Gilmoregirlin · 2026-05-26T19:30:17+00:00

But if I make more than him, his money is not a reward?

lesliecarbone · 2026-05-26T18:52:35+00:00

There isn't enough money in the world to make me want to spend my days cooking, cleaning,
and taking care of someone else.

IcyTrapezium · 2026-05-26T18:42:12+00:00

You have to have extremely low self esteem to date anyone who views sex with you as a reward. People who have sex to feel good are the people who actually enjoy sex and they are better in bed.

Any woman who uses the word “provision” when talking about a man is conservative and conservative women usually don’t really like men. They think of men as spiritually and morally beneath them, like dogs. They may treat a man as a “leader” but it’s because they don’t want to think and want to sit back and get “princess treatment.”

y2kjanelle · 2026-05-26T20:02:34+00:00

not a concern tbh bc men are poor asf.

Bubbly_Ganache_7059 · 2026-05-26T18:51:12+00:00

This seems very specific to a very specific kind of dynamic if you catch my drift. Most people have their own jobs and their own lives outside of their partners and if they live together there's shared expenses. I think what you're describing belongs to people with certain dynamics. It sounds more like you're specifically talking about relationships where one partner works and the other doesn't but again, the majority of relationships don't have that kind of dynamic, and it's up to the two individuals with that kind of arrangement to work out specific details of said arrangements.

(Edit) Also I'm pretty sure it goes without saying that if both people work then cooking and cleaning should be something that both people contribute towards and do for each other.

Ranziel · 2026-05-26T18:58:31+00:00

Better opt out of relationships at that point. What a nightmare. We have to be better than this, otherwise it's all over.

Perfect-Resist5478 · 2026-05-26T19:39:49+00:00

I make a fuck ton more than my man, so k?

Lost_Reaction_5489 · 2026-05-26T18:56:30+00:00

Isn't this what transactional people already do?

jorts-enthusiast · 2026-05-26T19:07:47+00:00

Maybe don’t date people who treat sex and money like rewards for anything?

Gravel_Roads · 2026-05-26T18:37:49+00:00

Shoot, bro, take it further into “I am the Prize” and you’ll start developing a whole ass self esteem.

ladybird_00 · 2026-05-26T18:41:18+00:00

Actually, the more effective option would be to treat attention as a reward.

socraticsnail · 2026-05-27T02:29:06+00:00

My partner and I just reward one another daily with our continued shared presence in our shared life. Idk about y’all but that’s way easier than keeping score or being bitter all the time.

BlerdyBTwitch · 2026-05-26T18:42:08+00:00

This sounds so conservative. One day, I hope people take a more leftist approach to relationships that isn't so transactional and dehumanizing. (Had to edit the voice texting)

PuzzleheadedRow9896 · 2026-05-26T18:40:08+00:00

Lmao. My man couldn't ever have afforded my cooking or caretaking. My cleaning maybe, I'm pretty mediocre on that front. Lord, men gotta stop thinking their wallet is that fat.

Lenovo_Driver · 2026-05-26T19:06:09+00:00

See yall pursue low iq trad women who need your money and then label these lowlife pickmeishas modern women when none of that shit involves modernity.

>does she cook, does she clean, does she take care of you?

Are yall looking to date a woman to be your partner or a version of your mother who lets you fuck them if you’re a good boy?

Modern women are educated, employed and independent. They fuck because they want to and not because it’s their wifely duties like the uneducated women of the 1950s who lived lives solely to cater to men.

bluestjuice · 2026-05-26T19:55:44+00:00

I disagreed with that post and I disagree with this one too, but if all else fails, at least can the people who think this way date each other and leave the rest of us out of it?

purplejellyotter · 2026-05-26T19:58:03+00:00

I have sex when I want to have sex. I'm not rewarding anything.

Old_Assumption4020 · 2026-05-26T22:15:19+00:00

How about this:

Wherever you're a man, woman, non-binary person or whatever; and you're in a relationship that feels transactional, instead of turning it into a game and trying to "win", you can just

And I need you to hear me out here

You can just move on!

pie-mart · 2026-05-26T22:18:46+00:00

They already do. They go to strip clubs and OF and reward women in those fields with money. Women understand this and see this from men and thus often decide against being with men because they chase after sex first and foremost while pretending to be a family driven man

oppositegeneva · 2026-05-26T23:28:52+00:00

This already happens

Desperate people will always fall for miserable transactional relationships

Altruistic_Look_7868 · 2026-05-27T02:15:14+00:00

Then have something to offer in a relationship other than money. Easy, right?

Right_Teaching_8193 · 2026-05-27T05:49:38+00:00

Sex as a reward is weird. I don’t think it’s fair to say a lot of women are narcissistic without calling out men for doing the same and reducing women to their bodies so much they feel it’s their only bargaining chip for being treated decently at all

Financial_Leave4411 · 2026-05-26T21:38:28+00:00

As men are more desperate than women for sex and romance this is going to blow up in men’s faces 🤣 Men are like dogs and women are like camels but sure let’s play this little stand off game. 👍 It will only lead to women having more leverage as men get more and more frustrated while women sit back and enjoy their books, plants, cats, friends, travel and whine.

RightWindow5284 · 2026-05-26T21:05:07+00:00

The problem isn’t “women treat sex as a reward so men should treat money as a reward.”

The problem is treating a relationship like a video game where you hand out coins and orgasms for good behavior.

Sex isn’t something a woman “gives” and money isn’t something a man “gives” as payment. In a healthy relationship, both people choose to share sex, care, time, and resources because they want to, not because they’re being trained like pets.

Also, not all women are sitting there withholding sex to manipulate men, and not all men are walking wallets whose only value is provision. Reducing each other to “sex provider” vs “money provider” is exactly how you end up with resentment, cheating, and people feeling used. If your partner is genuinely selfish (only cares about what they get, never about what they give), the answer isn’t to “punish” them with bare‑minimum money or bare‑minimum sex. The answer is to leave and find someone who actually wants a partnership instead of a power struggle.

Relationships work better when: – Sex is about mutual desire and respect, not bribery. – Money and provision are about teamwork and shared goals, not leverage. – Both people can say “I need more from you” without turning basic care into a conditional reward.

You’re right about one thing: the “sex is a reward” mindset is toxic. The solution isn’t “fine, I’ll treat my money the same way.” The solution is to stop dating people who see everything as a transaction and build something with someone who doesn’t.

ThatBitchA · 2026-05-27T00:58:00+00:00

they only care about the man to the degree he satisfies her needs

That's kinda the whole point......

Why would I be in a relationship with someone who doesn't satisfy my needs?

I have my own money, so I'm not sure how his money is a reward.

Sex isn't a reward. I don't know any women who see sex as a reward. But there's plenty of men in this sub who view sex as a reward for their good (or lack of sex for their bad) behavior.

KoninginVanRotterdam · 2026-05-27T01:13:47+00:00

PROVISION? 😂😂😂

For what? How much? From who? To whom?

Women own their own money. We don't need your lunch money.

Its been going on for quite a while. Might want to catch up with reality because this comes across as really stupid.

exhaustedstudent · 2026-05-27T01:31:22+00:00

I mean, you have literally just illustrated exactly why women fought so hard for equal access to work and pay. I don't think this is the "gotcha" that you think it is.

MarioWilson122 · 2026-05-27T22:24:46+00:00

The problem is this still turns relationships into a reward system while pretending it is criticizing reward systems.

“If she performs well enough she earns more provision” is not fundamentally different from “if he performs well enough he earns more sex.” It is the same transactional mindset flipped around.

Also the post acts like only women evaluate men based on usefulness while literally arguing men should scale investment based on performance. That is the exact same conditional framework.

The bigger issue is modern dating becoming overly transactional on both sides. Too many people are treating relationships like optimization contracts instead of partnerships.

Also some of the frustration here probably comes from men realizing that “provider” alone is not enough leverage anymore. Women can work now, so a man bringing money to the table does not automatically create admiration, attraction, or loyalty by itself. That changed the dynamic heavily.

Reciprocity matters, but once both people start mentally itemizing every act of care, provision, affection, or effort, the relationship usually becomes miserable pretty fast.

C0mpL1c1t · 2026-05-28T00:45:11+00:00

If someone treats sex as a “reward” rather than a mutual joy GTF away from them!

Acrobatic-Monk9735 · 2026-05-26T19:14:37+00:00

Sex is a reward because it can ruin our bodies and risks our lives. Our RMV/ SMV goes down with every new partner. Men also get retroactive jealousy over anything we may have done in the past (such as degrading and painful sex practices like anal sex) or how fast we did it. Men make it very clear that they will use us as holes that they pump and dump, without our consent, if they don’t find us attractive enough to be in a relationship with.

Men should be extremely grateful that we allow them access to our bodies. It should be considered as an honor that they appreciate and are grateful for.

To view the women one has sex with as disposable trash or worthless because of her past or unworthy or a relationship because of her appearance is true narcissism.

Tons of men come here and gloat about pumping and dumping women. Or wishing they could pump and dump and humiliate women via retroactive jealousy. They aren’t grateful for sex.

We also risk pregnancy. Men are very loud and proud that they consider financial abortion a human right and want the ability to legally abandon their own kids that we produce for them. If anything goes wrong, we risk humiliation and degradation from other men, who blame us and say we should have picked a better partner. We make ourselves and our future offspring extremely vulnerable any time we have sex.

Edit: downvote all you want but everything I said is right. Men speak of sex with women, single mothers, and child support in a degrading, bitter, and hateful fashion. We make ourselves incredibly vulnerable for them. They should be grateful.

SylvarGrl · 2026-05-26T19:12:35+00:00

Selfish people are going to be selfish. I agree with you that sex shouldn’t be a reward; if you don’t want sex, don’t have sex. Using it to manipulate someone else just demeans both parties.

I don’t agree with your idea that the person being “rewarded” with sex should resort to the same behavior around money, though. If transactional behavior is ruining a relationship, the issue needs to be worked out or the relationship should end. Adding more transactional behavior is only going to escalate problems that already exist.

PositionStandard6089 · 2026-05-26T23:36:59+00:00

"Does she cook, clean and take care of you?"

i'll never understand why people think you need to have a vagina in order to cook and clean.

Emotional_Meal748 · 2026-05-26T18:45:10+00:00

I would use the word commitment instead of money. It’s more general

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No-Hovercraft-455 · 2026-05-27T01:01:38+00:00

Okay so we are earning the same and if I'm a good partner I get to spend like 75% of the money cause I get to spend mine and then half of his? Sounds good to me. And during the times I'm being bad partner I still spend 50% because it's my money. Sure sign me up.

ResponsibilityAny217 · 2026-05-27T04:42:54+00:00

How much money and what is the bare minimum?

These was a suggestion before that men pay their wives for her labor. So she cooks, cleans then she gets paid a actual salary.

There was also a suggestion before that men pay their wives for sex.

Key_Championship6642 · 2026-05-27T12:25:08+00:00

This already exists, it’s called having a sugar baby

Otjahe · 2026-05-27T14:17:52+00:00

Why would you want to be with a woman who doesn’t have a sex drive and sees sex as a reward?

Go for normal women who also enjoy sex

JPDL · 2026-05-27T23:59:15+00:00

i don't think treating relationships as even more transactional is gonna make the problem go away, acting out of vengeance towards the opposite sex will just hurt both sexes more and more, we can only control what we can do but that means avoiding engaging in relationships with people that have values incompatible with ours, not actively seeking it and perpetuate the cycle. sometimes the only way to win in a fight is by refusing to unsheathe your sword.

going__nowhere · 2026-05-28T18:54:17+00:00

Men already do that

AggravatingFlow1178 · 2026-05-30T04:15:47+00:00

If A women treat sex as a reward, A men should treat his money as a reward

I could agree to that modification. In that scenario both people are being toxic and not operating as a couple, they are operating as a prostitute prime subscription.

Broadly, neither men nor women should treat sex nor money as a reward.

Barely-moral · 2026-05-26T18:43:17+00:00

His money, his attention, his efforts. Everything.

If you want something from me then give me what I want. There will be trade or there will be nothing.

Title	If women treat sex as a reward, men should treat his money as a reward.
Author	Consistent_Iron_5115
Upvotes	42
Comments	264
Date	May 26, 2026 6:31 PM UTC (1 month ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1tofrkh/if_women_treat_sex_as_a_reward_men_should_treat/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/if-women-treat-sex-as-a-reward-men-should-treat.1581313 https://theredarchive.com/post/1581313

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