My friend matched with a guy on OLD. He sent her this..... what in the???

fingernmuzzle · 2021-07-09T23:09:35+00:00

Guy, fuck all the way off. My ADDRESS???? 😂🤡

_cnz_ · 2021-07-09T23:58:23+00:00

I still don’t understand why women today are still on OLD if they’re getting shit like this….

08__80 · 2021-07-10T00:03:51+00:00

AIM preferred...

AIM still exists??? This dude has to be at least 50.

catlady4u · 2021-07-10T00:33:56+00:00

We should make a form for men with the yes/no dealbreakers being:

Do you have at least one 'crazy ex'? Are you bald, fat, short or ugly? Do you believe in 50/50? Do you consume porn in any way? Are you on Reddit?

Can anyone add to this?

tactical_viper · 2021-07-10T01:58:58+00:00

“I just like traditional women.”

Lol baby please. Y’all be wanting 20 year olds but good luck finding one of us that has these archaic viewpoints on appearance. Who tf is gonna police their SO into not having tattoos, piercings, or colored hair? Men are whack.

I just love how they think they can do this shit but male attention is not rare nor is it a commodity. He will get nexted into oblivion and then complain that all women want Chads and don’t want to take care of his unwashed ass.

Twohagsover30 · 2021-07-10T01:06:30+00:00

AHAHAHAHAHAHAH. No.

Block/delete

'lol it's a joke' -scrote

insert forever silence -FDS practitioner

heroic_nincompoop · 2021-07-09T23:29:06+00:00

OH MY GOD, this reminds me of those intensely cringy videos male YouTubers make when they ask their female fans to impress them over Discord or apply to be their girlfriends. Like CDawgVA calling up girls grilling them on their suitability as girlfriends. I know it's a joke but still... ewwww 🤢 and In all these types of videos, the female fans jump through hoops trying to impress the guys, who just clown on them for views. So em-bar-AZ-ing

jupitaur9 · 2021-07-10T03:35:17+00:00

This was written, not just to weed out, but also to try to piss off women who won’t “qualify.”

Note the bit about not wanting the “services” of anyone who can answer yes to any of the bottom section questions.

If they find a pickme who does disqualify herself but tries to explain to gain acceptance, he’s got a live one. Someone who will be in a permanent one-down position, apologizing for not being his dream girl.

greatmoonlight21 · 2021-07-10T02:29:37+00:00

Wait a second. Why does it say "we are not currently interested in your services" at the bottom in small font? Who is we??

shelballama · 2021-07-10T01:31:18+00:00

The weight, tattoo, natural and current hair colors and "have you ever been a man" really did it for me. Launch the whole man into the sun

Edit: SOMEHOW MISSED THE ADDRESS PART, I'M SCREAMING

insurrectionaryINTJ · 2021-07-09T23:20:27+00:00

Dude wants a woman with no tattoos, piercings, or dyed hair, yet likely has a protruding belly, bad skin from abusing alcohol and junk food, a small ED peepee, and no sense of style.

Astral_weaver · 2021-07-10T05:54:12+00:00

I saw this shit on another sub in reddit, instantly down voted it.

We cannot afford having men believe that they deserve to dehumanize us like that.

Boondersnoontch · 2021-07-10T00:55:41+00:00

Harry Potter and the Audacity of This Scrote 🤣🤣🤣

SuitablePerformance3 · 2021-07-10T00:21:02+00:00

He's red pilled for sure, also note the majority of the questions have to do with contact info, basically stalking info. Either way this is pathetic and incel af, goddamn losers.

BlairWaldrfsHeadband · 2021-07-10T00:12:45+00:00

The worst thing about this is that this absolute scrote clearly did not write this ~oFfiCiAl gIrLfRiEnd ApPlicAtIoN~ he found it somewhere in a musty corner of the interwebs (probably complete with moldy cum rags) and thought it was so clever he adopted it for his own use without even making it timely or relevant. Bro, MySpace? Home phone? “AIM preferred”?? He’s hoping some pick-me will jump through this ridiculous hoop like “tee-hee, he’s so creative! And he has high standards!” and he can’t even bother to put the smallest amount of effort into updating it for the 21st century. I think I lost brain cells reading that and writing this but THE AUDACITY

Painfulmenstruation · 2021-07-09T23:12:03+00:00

“Do you whistle on a regular basis?”

The man has been in jail for sure.

Whistling is a huge faux pas in jail, a big breach of social etiquette. Any man who is weird about whistling definitely served some time.

ergonomic_logic · 2021-07-10T00:04:38+00:00

So clearly he doesn’t actually want to date…

👀

This is like the guys who put copy pastas in their profile that are geared more towards making sexist men laugh than attracting women.

Equal-Ear2312 · 2021-07-10T05:18:12+00:00

"Justin approved"? Hol' up!

lemme get my examining tools for Justin and I'll find him subpar in just 3 seconds.

this is disgusting. I have encountered list-dudes myself. they were usually highschool boys and even the girls in my class made fun of the list requirements.

but grown men doing the list-thing? this is not "order a ffffemaleeeee", you moron!

top_of_the_stairs · 2021-07-09T23:22:25+00:00

You know what I "deem necessary?" The exact location of where this guy must place his application: anywhere within his Sigmoid colon that pleases him best 🤷‍♀️ Heck, I'm a generous soul; he can go a bit deeper to his Transverse colon if he likes 👍

......but yes, deep & far beyond the Rectum, that's where this application belongs 🙂

Novemberinthechair · 2021-07-10T01:57:54+00:00

He got that from Fifty Shades of Grey. The psychotic man drew up a contract for the dipshit girl that included a legal obligation to keep her pubic area shaved at all time...among other things.

That book is toxic waste. I hate that it became mainstream and became synonymous with progressiveness.

kaoutanu · 2021-07-10T02:24:52+00:00

AIM? Did grandpa send this through on a fax machine??

switchitbitch · 2021-07-10T03:34:42+00:00

Ew what a dumbass

VividPsychology7 · 2021-07-10T08:41:42+00:00

Yet if she were to send him an “official boyfriend application” in which he had to state his height and penis length, men would be outraged

Apprehensive_Ad_7917 · 2021-07-10T06:53:56+00:00

Obviously an instant block but I’d absolutely consider sending a clown college application in response to this lol

pikachu4me · 2021-07-10T01:57:25+00:00

I've seen applications like this before, usually from guys who would complain about women leaving them on read after sending it to them. LVM are pathetic.

Reception_Queasy · 2021-07-10T11:18:03+00:00

And what? Is this guy a 6 foot tall, attractive looking, well muscular, well mannered, has his own apartment, doesn't have any toxic friends or family, won't push her BOUNDARIES, makes atleast 80k+ a year, Doesn't do any of the crap he's stated he doesn't like himself. Give me a break. You can have standards that you live upto. Also, application form? He's not worth it. He's going to cry and join the RP movement in a few years, if he hasn't already.

shockingupdate · 2021-07-10T04:45:04+00:00

I remember this OG meme. It was funny back in like 2005 but now it’s pure cringe. Multiple questions about her ears? Why???

fireforestfairy · 2021-07-10T11:08:14+00:00

It's creepy how this application is asking for her full name, residence location, phone number, and email. It's almost like he's a scammer who wants her personal information.

Kristeninmyskin · 2021-07-10T14:41:48+00:00

Wait till he sees the boyfriend application I’d send him! Height: Penis length: Girth: How well do you cook? How often do you clean the whole house? The kitchen? The bathroom?

Please attach bank statements, investment statements, 401K information, health insurance card, clean bill of health with no STDs, references from at least three ex girlfriends supporting your sexual ability, lack of toxicity and manipulation and absence of crazy relatives. And of course, pictures.

honeybadgerattitude · 2021-07-09T23:37:59+00:00

Damn it! I’m out. I’m a whistler. 😗

justiceforamy · 2021-07-10T01:47:18+00:00

This is all awful but MySpace ? Is he using the same form since 2006 ?

mamadgaf · 2021-07-10T15:51:33+00:00

I love this because these guys so clearly vet themselves out. It’s so easy when they’re this obvious.

maggiebear · 2021-07-10T04:16:09+00:00

I would have soooo much fun filling this out.

DandelionScreaming · 2021-07-10T03:38:56+00:00

“Hi, fill out way too much information and meet my exact standards and don’t you dare lie once because I WILL check through… MySpace.” Because of course everyone’s greatest fear is being rejected by this dude. It’s referred to as a service again at the bottom. Ah crap, my ears are pierced 2/16 of an inch, guess I’m getting rejected. Anywhooo. 🤷‍♀️ Also… we? Was this a group pamphlet they all borrowed? Lol.

millennialpink2000 · 2021-07-10T02:11:11+00:00

Call this guy Keith Sweat because he's got it twisted. He's NOT the prize. Dump him in the trash where his abusive ass belongs

annalmsw · 2021-07-09T23:48:12+00:00

Home phone? AIM screen name? This is from the 2000’s.

ferretcat · 2021-07-10T17:09:20+00:00

“AIM prefered” ok, dinosaur.

LovedDemons · 2021-07-10T13:51:39+00:00

I'd say she should print this out and send him a pic of her throwing it in the trash, but this garbage isn't even worth the single sheet of cheap copy paper.

freedrinksbadadvice · 2021-07-09T23:19:40+00:00

I need him to have every available seat.

Hhjjuuy · 2021-07-10T07:27:57+00:00

>100 & <175

I hate this.

Throwawaydrew54321 · 2021-07-09T23:54:33+00:00

AOL preferred lol

Throwawaydrew54321 · 2021-07-09T23:53:55+00:00

AIM preferred lol

platinumprimarina · 2021-07-11T00:20:14+00:00

The word that jumps out is “services” like he’s hiring her as a maid or something instead of looking for an equal partner. What a joke.

Wild_Artio · 2021-07-11T00:14:03+00:00

I don’t know if this a joke? Is he trying to be ironic? I’m so confused/disgusted

PeanutButterPigeon85 · 2021-07-10T09:05:18+00:00

Some might see this post and think it's fake, but I know that it's not. My best friend matched with a guy like this. He sent her a 500+ word essay about what he will require from her (e.g., immediate responses to any messages he sends) and how she needs to understand that he's superior to all women and most men. He explained in the essay that he expects a woman to serve him and put him first in everything. Because he's an Upright Christian Man (TM). And this was all before they'd even exchanged greetings!!

AbbyDean1985 · 2021-07-10T22:59:51+00:00

She blocked him, right?

notroyaltyyet · 2021-07-10T22:22:51+00:00

Super late to this party but this is like that book, The Rosie Project. The main protagonist has Aspergers (I think) he's also a scientist and makes a screening questionnaire to meet a potential wife. Its a funny book. It's not funny doing it in real life though. But I bet that's where he got the idea - it's not even original.

XxShykatxX · 2021-07-10T19:56:45+00:00

Uhm, relationships shouldn't be a business deal. What worries me the most is the "we" part. Who is we?

LunaPlanner · 2021-07-10T18:23:09+00:00

This seems really old. Who still has a home phone? Or AIM? And there isn't anything about social media. I doubt your friend's match made this, he probably just found it online and couldn't even be bothered to bring it up to date.

midwesternwinds · 2021-07-10T12:13:52+00:00

Like this doesn't have enough red flags, it shows he didn't even read it since it refers to using Myspace. Bad reading comprehension alone is a turnoff.

RabidWench · 2021-07-10T07:15:33+00:00

I'm shocked the deal breakers are in section 3; that should be the title of the whole document.

revengeofgivingtree · 2021-07-10T02:25:23+00:00

Some of these questions are appropriate, but most of them are BS. Asking it this way says "I am completely tactless"

FDS-GFY · 2021-07-11T13:37:50+00:00

AIM? What is he, 60 years old?

FDS-GFY · 2021-07-11T13:37:16+00:00

Every time I come here my jaw falls on the floor.

kangaskhaniscubones · 2021-07-10T21:13:24+00:00

😂 This is like 15 years old since it talks about AIM. Probably the guy was making a bad joke

Title	My friend matched with a guy on OLD. He sent her this..... what in the???
Author	krissycole87
Upvotes	583
Comments	126
Date	July 9, 2021 11:08 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/oh6yht/my_friend_matched_with_a_guy_on_old_he_sent_her/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/my-friend-matched-with-a-guy-on-old-he-sent-her.790655 https://theredarchive.com/post/790655

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