There are no "intimidated" men.

Maxarc · 2021-11-26T14:11:58+00:00

Isn't it pretty easy to change your view on this? It's, of course, context dependant. Some women use it as copium, others use it as legitimate and true criticism. Of course men can be intimidated by women, it happens all the time. This is because society teaches them that they are less of a man when someone decreases their relative power. This often makes more traditional men intimidated by intelligent women, women that earn more than them, or women that had more sexual experience. In the eyes of the more traditional man, decreased relative power means decreased manhood.

The women that use it as copium, on the other hand, often use this idea to backwards rationalize losing a debate or being turned down by a guy. This is equally as ridiculous, because it doesn't necessarily have to be true that the man was intimidated. It could simply be because he felt like he was right, or because he wasn't attracted.

ImNotHereForFunNoWay · 2021-11-26T14:49:17+00:00

It's messy.
Tbh, Ive been out with women who intimidated me slightly - beautiful, successful, confident, powerful etc. I suppose it's a subtle intimidation, thinking 'hmmm, am I good enough?' However, this feeling would never result in me (or, I imagine, most most men) leaving her.

There's absolutely no question that this term is thrown around and overused by women who are left/rejected for being hard work, boring or difficult.

'He left you because u were a rude arsehole not because u were successful and ambitious!'

On that note, I also think there is something to be said here about female friends often just gassing each other up without question. 'U were too good for him.' 'U deserve better' etc.. No not all of u deserve better, sorry!

Anyway, nuance is key as always..

pdoherty972 · 2021-11-26T15:26:57+00:00

Woman says that men are intimidated by her. This is a lie.

AKA "I'm a bitch and men can't stand me"

Mrs_Drgree · 2021-11-26T13:26:15+00:00

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LotBuilder · 2021-11-26T20:05:50+00:00

Men may fear rejection, but they are not intimidated by women.

livs4drpepper · 2021-11-26T14:11:59+00:00

the point I think the person who originally posted about men being intimidated by her is that sometimes men(probably women too just speaking from my experience) will dislike a woman for what they view as a positive trait

Like oh you work too hard, you’re too sexy, you’re too kind to strangers, and it’s like if a woman values these things she feels like woah woah these are things you should like about me so it feels like they’re just intimidated or scared or feel inferior when in reality they might just be thinking of the negative outcomes of all of these traits

Idk I think both sexes can definitley feel “intimidated” by eachother seems like OP is just playing semantics and thinks another word would suit better you can just say annoyed or doesn’t like

redditthrowaway1478 · 2021-11-26T12:24:21+00:00

I used to be intimidated by beauty.

Mrs_Drgree · 2021-11-26T13:13:35+00:00

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gofigure62 · 2021-11-26T13:41:56+00:00

IRL humans, which men tend to be most of the time have feelings of jealousy and inadequacy. These feelings can compound and make someone feel intimidated.

Often times when speaking of a person feeling "intimidation", they mean that they feel inadequate, they feel 'below' the woman in some regard. Either from her outgoing personality, her beauty, her finances, or her education.

No sane or reasonable person would conclude that men never experience feeling inadequate or intimidated by other humans who also tend to be women.

The "fantasy" aspect of this sub where men aren't people and don't experience well documented human emotion is really disturbing.

sypherprince · 2021-11-26T20:19:51+00:00

Correct. I am not intimidated. I am annoyed

Initial_Chemical7121 · 2021-11-26T12:23:15+00:00

All depends on the woman I guess.

Zerofication · 2021-11-26T19:26:31+00:00

Women explain things to themselves in a way that makes sense to them, and since they mostly do things based on their own feelings, they project that into men thinking that men too do things based on what they feel. Men project their rationale into women as well as they often explain what women do based on power or monetary benefits even though women just follow what they feel.

In other words, men view their feelings in terms of reasons, women view their reasons in terms of feelings, and both project that into the other sex.

TomorrowsWar · 2021-11-26T12:41:37+00:00

Feeling intimidated is a normal feeling everyone feels. The idea that you think it’s somehow a lie is silly based off that fact alone. Seriously

SladeWilsonXL9 · 2021-11-26T15:47:53+00:00

I shared this story before but I'll share it again. I once dated a woman who was 3 years older than me and who made more than me. She made 6 figures and had a big position in Port Authority. I do not make 6 figures, but I'm doing alright and never have to worry about where my next meal is coming from.

Anyway, on our first date she kept mentioning she makes 6 figures and her position, when the check came she insisted on paying because you guessed it, she makes 6 figures and I don't.

Second date was just like the first date, 6 figures this, 6 figures that, she just got an awesome condo in such and such. A lot of bragging. When the check comes, same thing, she'll pay it because she makes so much money. When I paid she told me she doesn't mind paying for me because she knows how expensive NYC is, and she can afford it because she makes 6 figures lol.

Anyway, I told her this is not working out because all she does is mention how she makes so much money and she belittles me and is condescending because I don't make as much as her. What did she say in response to me clearly expressing myself? "I am intimidated by a strong independent woman."

What a joke, this was in 2016 before I ever joined reddit or new what FDS was, but looking back I wouldn't be surprised if she was one of those FDS losers.

Edit: grammar problems, how embarrassing.

NarniaFox · 2021-11-26T13:17:59+00:00

Men can be intimidated by women, but the OP in the post you're talking about wasn't really clear about what his definition of intimidation is. In my view it's very close to insecurity and often it is insecurity of any sort. "I'm not good enough for her/she has better options/I have nothing to offer her". Sometimes it's reality, sometimes it's all in his head.

I don't think I've experienced it personally, as I'm not in the position to intimidate anyone and men usually see me as a "safe" option, but I know women who do intimidate men either just by their appearance and the way they "carry" themselves or by their career success.

Creation_Soul · 2021-11-26T12:37:46+00:00

I don't know if this is exactly "intimidation", but I know an ex-couple who met in university (studying the exact same thing)and started similar career paths (at the same time as they finished university at the same time)

But within about 3 years, the woman proved more ambitious and better in the field they were working in and advanced her career much faster (both in terms of hierarchy and income). The guy tried to keep up with her but couldn't, but his ego (or maybe fear) also didn't allow him to just let it go and accept the situation and in the end he broke-up with her because the pressure he put on himself was too much, he overworked himself and got burned out.

SonicBackScratcher · 2021-11-26T15:29:17+00:00

Men who think women can't be intimidating never met the head of my specialty department. Relatively short, frail woman, and she could make or break you. And she did it without trying. She was no nonsense and a single slight rebuke from her was enough to get you back on track.

bluehorserunning · 2021-11-26T14:53:13+00:00

I've had men whom I had expressed no interest in, with no prompting from me, tell me that I was intimidating. The context was one classmate in my organic chemistry class, and a couple of junior students in my aikido dojo.

AbbreviationsHot1200 · 2021-11-26T21:46:02+00:00

As Patrice O'Neal said, men are better than women. Men who feel intimidated haven't realized that yet.

Rough_Collections · 2021-11-26T15:00:30+00:00

Some men who have been raised predominantly by women have been conditioned to fear women and the consequences of a woman's wrath. BUT most men who have broken that leash or are leaders are not intimidated by women. Men who are in power do a MeToo calculation and realize that dealing with certain women is not worth the hassle. Also many men have realized that the easiest way to get out of a toxic relationship is to stroke a woman's ego and tell her that she intimidated them. It's kind of a logical trap because for you to reject that excuse is to admit your attracted to weak men and that is a reflection on you so women tend to be grumpy about it but leave the guy alone after the breakup. That same man will turn around and pick a woman that is more suitable and the ex's anger will be directed at.....the other woman aka" the weaker" one. Manipulative but necessary in this age.

Wonderful_Desk · 2021-11-26T12:33:11+00:00

Even though this is a cmv, it’s for sure wrong. Some women use it as a cope, but a lot of men downplay the power women have that ISNT correlated to brute strength or size. This is just men looking at one thing and not realizing their simple nature prevents them from seeing the importance of other factors they don’t find important

taapy234 · 2021-11-26T14:17:49+00:00

Men do get intimidated, but not for the reasons women claim. I mean... sure, for the beauty part if the woman is actually hot and everybody knows it. Or if she's actually popular in some way.

Women think we are intimidated by them for making more money, or because they have "better" jobs, etc.

What actually happens is we sense that you are not actually relationship material. We instinctively sense the hypergamy from women even if the man is not redpilled. We also sense whether the woman is "high maintenance" or not too. We know women treat man's money as "our" money whereas her money is "her's" which is quite common in many relationships. We also know women will secretly detest you if you don't fulfill the masculine gender roles to its fullest extent by "providing" for her in some way even if she makes more than you, etc

We also know women in general are not known for their loyalty, and will jump ship if things get boring or "abusive" (not as defined by the dictionary but as defined by feminists) or if she finds a "better" man than you, etc.

Its not intimidation. Its can be anything that ranges from off putting to incompatible to unattractive to annoying to downright awful.

True intimidation do happen but they are rare.

Lameador · 2021-11-26T14:28:56+00:00

In dating, some women , usually with high professional status, involuntarily give some men the impression that they are out of their league or that « the door is closed » so the ontimidated men don’t even try to flirt with her. Which is a pity because she could be welcoming their gallantry

This phenomenon definitely exists. The same way some high intelligence people fail at communicating efficiently their message to normal intelligence people

On the opposite, as « I intimidate men » is a possible reason for failure in dating that preserves female ego, it is often used wrongly as a rationalisation that allows avoiding self awareness of more ego-damaging reasons for lack of romantic success

smaran13 · 2021-11-26T16:14:15+00:00

I don’t want to intimidate any man so as to prove the virtue of my feminism or my woman power or whatever. And I don’t want to be intimidated either. “Intimidated” in dating is code for turned off, being miffed, and feeling that the other person is either pretentious, defensive, or unwelcoming- all three are undesirable when meeting a prospective date.

Just be normal, warm, reasonable and polite. No need to show off or actively try to intimidate anyone. You’re benefitting no one, least of all yourself.

CosmicBioHazard · 2021-11-26T16:22:24+00:00

I only ever hear ‘intimidated’ to mean ‘she wasn’t up to his standards and he turned her down’

Like ‘oh he’s intimidated by sexually liberated women’ or something. I never hear ‘she’s too good-looking and the dude was intimidated to approach her’ which is something that actually happens.

It’s the same line of thinking as when a woman gets turned down and she says ‘his standards are too high, he’s not that desirable’, to which my response is ‘if you don’t think he’s desirable then why were you hoping he’d be into you?’

IcarusKiki · 2021-11-27T01:04:09+00:00

if a young Adriana Lima walked up to you i guarantee you would be intimidated. but i agree that most of the time its copium for being a bitch

a-little-spice · 2021-11-26T13:33:13+00:00

This is one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever seen. Plenty of men are intimidated by women

modidlee · 2021-11-26T12:15:40+00:00

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TotalTravesty · 2021-11-26T13:22:53+00:00

Every week there is a PPDer or PPDers who throw a fit because a woman laughed at a man.

They express horror that women are getting more educated and better employed than men. They don’t even want to see women in action movies (a work of pure fiction!)

This entire generation of “lost males” is based on the fact that they can’t get women to depend on them like their grandfathers did and how that terrifies them.

This sub is just a big ol’ list of the ways some men (couldn’t be me…) are intimidated by women. And women know this. Want to see an intimidated man? Get two female friends to stare at one and snicker to themselves.

CrabMaster69xx · 2021-11-26T12:17:12+00:00

I don't even understand how you could be intimidated by a woman that isn't like Amanda Nunes?

Like what are you gonna do to me? Hit me in the head with your law degree or tell me to fuck myself in 3 different languages?

Intimidation is purely physical. Women don't have the ability to be intimidating.

Think about this.. A 6'4 bodybuilder vs a 5'4 partner at a law firm. Whos intimidated by who?

Jamless_universe · 2021-11-26T13:20:03+00:00

Men are often intimidated by women who are high earners,highly educated,very smart,extremely attractive aka out of his league.

But that's okay.

Women are intimidated by some men too.

TrueStorms · 2021-11-26T13:42:45+00:00

There absolutely are intimidated men, the word has become so loaded that you don’t comprehend the meaning anymore. It’s not an insult and nor is his being intimidated some kind of compliment to the woman.

KingInTheNorthVI · 2021-11-26T14:22:01+00:00

This is complete bullshit if you put the average man in a room with Instagram models he's going to be 9/10 too intimated to talk to any of them.

Demasii · 2021-11-26T14:24:03+00:00

Woman says that men are intimidated by her. This is a lie.

No it's not.

A woman says this when she couldn't win with a guy, but needs some excuse to tell her friends and protect her own ego.

Intimidation is not a good thing. It's not protecting her ego. It's literally knowing your flaws.

Devourer_of_felines · 2021-11-26T14:36:59+00:00

Well if a man is just too afraid of rejection to shoot his shot in general I’d consider that intimidated.

Although the only time I’ve seen the word used is when women in Guardian and Huffpo articles justify to themselves why they’re single well into their middle age. In which case the idea is just patently ridiculous; successful and good looking women are not struggling on the dating scene and are more likely to be married, not less.

dumbnunt_ · 2021-11-26T13:32:53+00:00

They're intimidated by women who make more money than they do and who are smarter or taller or better at sports.. list goes on

deste_eloise · 2021-11-26T16:20:38+00:00

The amount of triggered guys in this thread is proving otherwise lol

upalse · 2021-11-26T13:28:49+00:00

Your mom would disagree.

DarkSp3ctre · 2021-11-26T15:17:52+00:00

I’ve been intimidated by women before. Usually I don’t even approach those women though.

Substantial_Wasabi · 2021-11-26T15:32:46+00:00

Men have literally told me they were too intimidated to approach me the first time they saw me but okay

relish5k · 2021-11-26T15:56:05+00:00

A friend of mine is a kick-boxing instructor. On her OLD she had all these photos of her (looking fit and hot) in extremely aggressive postures. I don't think men felt like she was tyrannizing or oppressing them with these photos. But I did tell her that softer, more feminine photos would encourage men to view her favorably, and make her seem in greater need of a man in her life.

Ohyarlysmiles · 2021-11-26T19:08:41+00:00

LMFAO

There are plenty of intimidated men. Wow what a joke of a post.

Common wisdom: if a super hot woman walked up to a single dude and told him she was down to fuck and had a room they could go to (assume it's known that the place is safe), most every guy would sign up no hesitation.

Reality: In that scenario, the majority of men would agree but not be up to going straight to a private place to fuck this woman. They'd 'have to get comfortable.' They'd have to 'talk to her.' They'd have performance anxiety, etc. etc.

That right there is intimidation.

A lot of the butthurt anger fantasies of TRP/manosphere/whatever are borne of intimidation. Honestly, the obsession with past partners and whatever --- let's just assume all the narratives surrounding the research on the topic is true and that the infidelity risk is higher or whatever --- comes from fearing failing to live up to previous partners. The Cock Carousel and its attendant revenge porn the Wall come from the fears surrounding female sexuality, i.e. intimidation.

Men will go to the ends of the earth to avoid appearing or seeming intimidated and so they will cloak their intimidation with another banner.

Mustbeaight · 2021-11-26T20:10:36+00:00

Nah dawg. There is this girl at my apartment complex that I just noticed one day. Taller than me beautiful and thick asf( in all the right places) . She also has a very stern demeanor. I did feel intimidated. But not scared. I just felt like she was so far away out my league in every way and i could never in a million years no matter how much better i become get or keep a girl like that around. And I think i saw her at my gym while working she was working out with her boyfriend . And oh boy that feeling of mine was just confirmed. The dude is like 6’4, jacked, handsome (pauuussseee) , white etc etc. I just laughed to myself and said ofcourse this is her dude. Makes sense. Couldn’t have imagined any guy being below that being good enough to even make her smile at them. I wasn’t even planning on approaching her at any point obviously. It just noticed it while going about my activities. I only recognized her at the gym because most girls aren’t built like her

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historyhill · 2021-11-26T16:18:52+00:00

I was told once by a guy in a bar (who I wasn't even talking to beyond pleasantries) that my height was intimidating, but that could have just been a failed negging attempt.

KurkTheMagnificent · 2021-11-26T16:52:36+00:00

Intimidated (aka unattracted) to women who are:

taller than me

make significantly more money than me

smarter (IQ wise not crystalized intelligence) than me

I consider myself good looking, so physical attractiveness isn't a deterrent.

Also it is typically a combination of the above that will exceed the threshold; rarely one by itself will scare me. Also adjustments are made for age. Someone older than me I would expect to have a leg-up.

They're rare, but do exist. I find many of the "simps" for these women want them to be their mom lol.

Classic_Touch · 2021-11-26T17:35:18+00:00

I only say it because I have been told many times I do or am. I personally don't see why they would be.

hudibrastic · 2021-11-26T17:55:57+00:00

There were times I felt intimidated, when the girl was clearly out of my league (and it was just a date, we were not together)... Never because “she is smart” or “she is independent” or “she has a successful career” or “because she says what she thinks”, or other bullshit women invent to cope with rejection

Jakes1967 · 2021-11-26T17:57:05+00:00

Woman says that men are intimidated by her. This is a lie.

No, there were definitely women who intimidated me, when I was younger.

A woman says this when she couldn't win with a guy, but needs some excuse to tell her friends and protect her own ego.

This definitely happens, but there are definitely also women who intimidate men.

blood-soaked-earth · 2021-11-26T18:12:53+00:00

lmao you're fucking stupid

KikiYuyu · 2021-11-26T18:21:35+00:00

I'll grant you that a lot of the time, probably the vast majority of the time, a woman saying that a man was intimidated by her is just lying or coping.

But it's ridiculous to make a claim that there are NO intimidated men. It's something you can never prove, and it's something you never could have actually confirmed. How could you be so confident about something that's so broad, generalizing, and not based on information you lack?

migmatitic · 2021-11-26T18:25:15+00:00

Intimidating women just make me slower to approach them b/c I'm inclined to pedestalize them & gotta knock it off. Def not going to leave them—"intimidating" just means they're are hot asf for whatever reasons

Laytheblameonluck · 2021-11-26T18:39:03+00:00

This is a no brainer, men are intimidated by women because of the trouble they can cause.

Women think the guys are avoiding them or starring st them because they're sexy when in fact the guys often just see trouble.

Pigeon-in-Boots · 2021-11-26T18:43:55+00:00

I'm sure of the billions of men that have existed a few have, in fact, been intimidated by a woman. Especially men that aren't comfortable with a woman making more money/being more successful. And I'm sure some women have been intimidated by men.

StinkingDischarge · 2021-11-26T19:06:17+00:00

Her: "I'm a strong, independent woman with an advanced degree, a great job, a high income a luxury car and a beautiful house. Men are intimidated by me"

Translation: "I'm an intolerable bitch"

sarkington · 2021-11-26T19:09:46+00:00

People can feel any way they want. And some men have said they feel intimidated, like the OP of that post, and I believe them

Taipanshimshon · 2021-11-26T19:34:54+00:00

I know several women who should intimidate men. And other women. All of humanity really.

The same goes for some men I know.

Some people are indeed intimidated by others because of their psychological development.

ruboyuri · 2021-11-26T20:21:42+00:00

Why don’t you believe men?

SaBahRub · 2021-11-26T21:51:26+00:00

OP was a dude. He said he was intimidated. He outlined very common scenarios where men try and bring women down a peg (see: negging in dating, sabotaging and being controlling in relationships)

I am shocked you don’t believe a man

Reisiluu · 2021-11-26T22:16:00+00:00

What are men afraid of that women could do? According to this sub: divorce rape, baby trapping, paternity fraud, false rape accusations, dead bedroom whilst trapped in marriage, being cheated on, being settled on, being used for their money.

Men can be afraid of some women. Usually it's not because she's waving a gun at him. It's because she tells him she "forgot" to take a pill or two.

Apprehensive_Boat_70 · 2021-11-26T22:24:11+00:00

Definetly there are intimidated men but not for reasons you think, remember that a man even admitting he has troubles with women makes him object of ridicule in the mainstrean culture, you as a man cant just say you suck at dating withouth being looked down for it rather than helped, not to mention there is still a considerable amount of people who have the ridiculous belief that if a man doesnt has a woman by his side then he is worthless, he doesnt has women throwing their panties at him? He is worthless, this creates a situation where for a man, to be rejectded by a woman is to be rejected by society, even if it isnt true, thats what all men who were raised under those toxic beliefs experience at their deepest subconcious level, but it can be cured, and once it is cured, the feelings of intimidation will go away in a flash.

However if a man doesnt wants to date a woman for wathever reason, he aint intimidated by her, he is just not into her🤷🏻‍♂️, a man who is actually intimidated by women rarely if ever rejects a woman.

Cheap-Pound7001 · 2021-11-26T22:32:05+00:00

The only women who intimate me have loaded guns pressed against my temple.

Being a bitch isn't the same as being intimidated.

NewWayNow · 2021-11-26T23:06:16+00:00

If I feel a woman is "out of my league" in terms of looks I guess you could say I'm intimidated.

You could also say a lot of guys are intimidated by women taller than themselves.

Schicksalschatzz · 2021-11-26T23:46:12+00:00

Are some soy infested males of 2021 intimidated by women?

Sure

Are most of the men who women purport to be "intimidated" by them, actually intimidated?

Obviously not.

Insidious-Sid · 2021-11-26T23:56:23+00:00

High earning women have difficulty with lower value men. But it's not because these men are intimidated.

I don't want a $200 European sports sedan because I can't afford the oil changes.

High value women are the same thing. Men want an equal partner, or maybe where he slightly out earns her. WHY? Because men KNOW that women cannot be happy with a lower value man. Women are hypergamous. Women trade up, not down. Women want MORE than their last man brought to the table, not less. Women's standards go UP as they age, not down.

So, high value women want to feel intimidating to men but I ask them this.

Are you intimating to an equal or better man? No, you're not.

Just because a man can recognize a woman out of his league and avoid her doesn't make him intimated. It makes him intelligent.

michael1962-01 · 2021-11-27T02:31:24+00:00

I am intimidated by feminists and landwhales and uglies.

Must be some deep limbic system program error deep inside me.

cupcakegensis · 2021-11-27T06:31:05+00:00

I mean we've a been afraid of a woman before. Teachers, moms, doctors, policewoman all intimidate us. I know in my debate club many people were intimated by a specific girl who could win at any style with no prep. There is a bully in an office I use to work that most of us were intimated by.

Megabyte7637 · 2021-11-28T02:14:14+00:00

Interesting.

nevetz100 · 2021-11-28T06:02:09+00:00

Ight y’all you can be a male and be intimidated by a women.

I have met both men and women that have psychopathic / sociopathic tendencies and that can be terrifying in some settings.

Regardless of gender.

KickAss2021 · 2021-11-28T06:03:33+00:00

Literally it's just insecurities being confused with intimidation. If she has a b face that could be seen as intimidating

RIchardjCranium · 2021-12-01T22:50:49+00:00

We’re not intimidated. We just don’t want or need a loud, bossy pain in the ass.

Chaos_and_Horny · 2021-11-26T21:04:03+00:00

im intimidated by the majority of women, dont know what you are talking about

Flightlessbirbz · 2021-11-26T19:36:06+00:00

Except the OP of that question is a guy, and he must have felt intimidated by certain women before, or otherwise why ask it? I think people use the word “intimidated” in different ways. It doesn’t always have to imply some kind of fear, sometimes people just mean that they see someone else as “above” them in some way and therefore feel a bit inadequate around them. Like maybe they’re a lot better looking, clearly smarter, higher economic class, etc., so you assume they must think badly of you. Pretty sure that’s what the OP of that thread was talking about.

That being said, I don’t believe being “intimidated” is a common reason to reject someone. So in that way, it’s a cope. More likely he just didn’t think she was hot enough.

Title	There are no "intimidated" men.
Author	redditthrowaway1478
Upvotes	108
Comments	391
Date	November 26, 2021 12:13 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/r2lt9i/there_are_no_intimidated_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/there-are-no-intimidated-men.1086464 https://theredarchive.com/post/1086464

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