What does agreeable mean to you?

mrcs84usn · 2023-02-07T03:33:03+00:00

Agreeableness is one of the big 5 personality traits.

Here’s what psychology today has to say:

Agreeableness is a personality trait that can be described as cooperative, polite, kind, and friendly. People high in agreeableness are more trusting, affectionate, altruistic, and generally displaying more prosocial behaviors than others. People high in this prosocial trait are particularly empathetic, showing great concern for the welfare of others, they are the first to help those in need.

Aubrey_D_Graham · 2023-02-07T04:00:58+00:00

This sounds exactly like the 3 F's: Fit, Friendly, Feminine. This man has probably listened to Kevin Samuels.

A man hopes this would screen women like when women put no man under 6 on their bio.

NotARussianBot1984 · 2023-02-07T02:25:14+00:00

Hey plat, I'll give a good example of disagreeable I had.

Matched with a girl on Tinder, had a fun date at the beach, she escalated flirting in a very sexual manner, I do my best to reciprocate, good time. Another date later that weekend, we have some fun date and some decent sex. Going along ok.

So later that week maybe next week, we're texting and flirting, she sends me a nude, cool. Im a guy, I appreciate that. But I appreciated it too long I guess lol. It's over Snap so once it's gone it's gone, and I'm not a dick to save them.

She gets pissed I took 8 minutes to say she was sexy. Ok...skip forward to another day. I'm busy helping a friend build a chicken coop. I let the girl know I'm busy today so will reply when I can.

I hear my phone go off. Ok I'm busy I'll answer later. An hour later, another message. Ok I have a minute free. I check the phone and see 2 msges. First one was a normal conversation text continuing off, the second, a pic of her breasts.

See now I know better! I know I better reply right away and say "damn you look good, wish I was there" or something affirmative. Didn't wait no 8 mins this time lol.

Her response? "Oh so you only reply when I send nudes?"

Sometimes, a girl just wants to start shit. That is disagreeable. I ended things that day. Life too short to always be wrong.

Flightlessbirbz · 2023-02-07T09:06:07+00:00

“Agreeable” in this context is code for “submissive.” Don’t care what anyone says about the technical definition of “agreeable,” nobody puts that in their profile unless they’re into RP shit and looking for a submissive woman. So if that’s not the type of man you want, take it as a big red flag. Most of these guys are in fact hostile and will make everything a win/lose game.

King-SAMO · 2023-02-07T02:50:21+00:00

Some guys mean submissive, but it could also mean someone who uses their words like a grown up and doesn’t automatically escalate shit. The antonym of “combative.” It could also be in the context of someone who is easy going and not too demanding.

i never put that in a profile because its kind of a reddish flag, and besides; announcing that you’re disqualifying people who like to disagree with you is just asking for trouble.

Willow-girl · 2023-02-07T05:23:15+00:00

"Agreeable" is a kind of covert contract between rich men and the women in their lives, i.e., :"I'll give you access to my lifestyle in exchange for you going along with whatever I want/say."

My last husband tried to pull this shit with me. Didn't work too well.

CruelAngelGradThesis · 2023-02-07T03:36:01+00:00

In this case probably just games to bait the most angry disagreeable women possible for hate sex

Fearfactoryent · 2023-02-07T16:18:58+00:00

As a female, to me it means not arguing for the sake of arguing. I have a lot of female friends who knitpick their partners for every little thing, I think it’s the most annoying thing ever. I couldn’t marry someone that was always criticizing me

INFPneedshelp · 2023-02-07T02:32:30+00:00

I think he wants to run the show and wants someone to follow him. I would run

januaryphilosopher · 2023-02-07T10:56:24+00:00

Specifically putting the word "agreeable" instead of words like "nice, kind, friendly" suggests he's looking for someone to follow his orders. It's a word hardly used in this context by men who aren't into the manosphere and want a specific kind of woman and dynamic.

nastyfella · 2023-02-07T03:27:24+00:00

Not argumentative. But I’ve never heard someone ask for this before, and paired with feminine and fit? Weird. Red flag.

WYenginerdWY · 2023-02-07T03:42:13+00:00

Given that this person is also a man who has self identified as conservative, I'd say the practical meaning is "will continue to smile, silently and endlessly, while I shit all over their hopes, dreams, and personhood".

It's code for I'm a walking red flag and you should probably stay away from me

ivyleaguehoodrat · 2023-02-07T02:32:33+00:00

In this context it means “I took the Kevin Samuels pill” 🤮

Academic_Snow_7680 · 2023-02-07T14:17:55+00:00

It means "does as I want and tell her"

It means "puts me first".

Massive main character syndrome.

Stunning-Potato-1984 · 2023-02-07T02:26:47+00:00

It's a euphemism for doormat.

toasterchild · 2023-02-07T02:10:05+00:00

I think it means - I have a fragile ego and when people disagree with me I can't handle it.

curealloveralls · 2023-02-07T07:52:10+00:00

Sounds like a boomer way of saying “vibes”

EasternToe3824 · 2023-02-07T15:37:24+00:00

It is not about feminine traits but compatibility. Agreeableness as per the five factor model runs on a spectrum and is an indicator for conformity and the ability and willingness to negotiate and compromise.

If both people in a relationship are low on agreeableness they will constantly butt heads over the smallest issues. If this is not the relationship you want it is better to opt out. Same with 2 push overs since there will be no decision made if none backs it up. The constant standstill breeds resentment until it becomes a motivator.

So what this guy wants is at least not a woman that constantly tries to walk all over him. He will most likely not be compatible with a woman that views herself as opinionated or has a combative attitude, i.e. argue for the sake of it or to get a reaction.

At least this is how I understand it.

RealAmericanWeasel · 2023-02-07T21:26:00+00:00

He may not be looking to appeal to you.

gate18 · 2023-02-07T03:12:16+00:00

Ass a woman this reads as a bit hostile.

As a man, I totally agree.

The first comment is

Agreeable in general means not causing an argument and escalating thing’s unnecessarily.

If that's what it means, it's a given, no one wants such a person. You as a woman do not want a man that starts an argument and escalates things unnecessarily just because, I don't know, you smiled at the waiter.

But you, surely, wouldn't need to ask for that on your profile. You'd expect men (humans) to be agreeable (if that's the definition)

SolidPuzzleheaded984 · 2023-02-07T03:19:19+00:00

Classic guy in his 40s asking for fit feminine and agreeable lol

_kittykat69_ · 2023-02-07T02:19:20+00:00

Cringe af

Ok-Professional3832 · 2023-02-07T02:14:01+00:00

Agreeable in general means not causing an argument and escalating thing’s unnecessarily.

It’s only okay if you can whisper what you want seductively into his ear in your language of choice.

He won’t specify which secondary language you must whisper with, but whisper you must if you are to be feminine.

Way to cherry pick an easy target op lol

I would prefer someone agreeable though. I don’t mind having adult conversations with a partner, but there is a time and place. It’s not at a restaurant causing a scene, it’s not taking issue with every little thing, it’s not arguing over where we go every single time.

Agreeable.

Birb-brained · 2023-02-07T07:40:10+00:00

Agreeable to me means positive, polite, altruistic, generally kind. Not a red flag to me personally. I’m more worried by that French comment. It’s a bit try hard.

Edit - oh just reread that is what he is looking for and that he is not describing himself as agreeable… hmm. That changes the context a little for me? Not sure why? Maybe it’s because I’ve seen it so many times used in context of wanting a ‘submissive’ girlfriend??

draiki13 · 2023-02-07T14:15:52+00:00

I do not think I can judge his definition of agreeable but I can say what mine is.

It’s someone who is willing to cooperate with me and trusts me to make good decisions even when it’s maybe not exactly what that person wants. That last part is more of an exception than a rule. They also do not seek arguments unless necessary.

Being disagreeable is a massive turn off. I have a couple of female friends who pick apart literally every interaction I have with them. It’s just exhausting drama because I looked at them wrong or used the wrong tone or didn’t text for a week. And we’re just friends. That’s why some (most?) men want agreeableness.

CradlingBrokenGlass · 2023-02-07T14:38:17+00:00

A woman who isn’t agreeable is a red flag for me. To me high agreeableness means she will care for her family first and be a good mother.

Sea-Professional-594 · 2023-02-07T19:07:20+00:00

Harvard men 🚩

LadyofTheGreyPath · 2023-02-07T22:46:04+00:00

I keep any feminine traits I have to a minimum. In public I'm cautious and cordial, with people I'm close with I'm outgoing and more friendly, with the person I am intimate with he sees the submissiveness. These aren't traits I use in everyday life, easy to take advantage of those and I'd rather not learn any horrific lessons in what happens when you're agreeable with the wrong person.

TaxNegative161 · 2023-02-07T02:01:11+00:00

There is no such thing as masculine and feminine traits in my opinion. There are traits that are more common in men than women, but they are socialised into us. They are either good traits, or bad traits in my opinion.

There's nothing wrong with being agreeable, but I've met a lot of women that are so socialised to be agreeable that they find it difficult to start even a minor disagreement, and that can be a problem. You have to look at traits wholistically.

Unfortunately either your Li k is fucked or my app is so I can't comment on the link.

Spirited-Track4414 · 2023-02-07T03:30:47+00:00

41.. lmaooooo yea ight

I-wanna-GO-FAST · 2023-02-07T04:23:15+00:00

It means he's probably looking to avoid the type of woman that is constantly looking for things to be offended by, such as innocuous preferences stated in a dating profile. I.e. things that someone that could be described as "disagreeable" would do.

themostgianthorse · 2023-02-07T02:43:53+00:00

It means don’t be a bitch.

No_Reflection_798 · 2023-02-07T03:36:05+00:00

Non-combative. Nice. Even-emotions. Truly communicative. Not, "I'm fine".

Steakman1 · 2023-02-07T03:48:31+00:00

If we go off the literal definition, it means either to be enjoyable and pleasurable, or to be willing to agree on something. In that sense, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting a woman who’s agreeable.

But I think many men who want an agreeable woman actually want a woman who lets them make all the decisions. Which I suppose in traditional households that was the norm, though maybe not necessarily to that extreme unless we’re going back to the colonial era or something. I can see how from the pov of men it can potentially sound great to have that power. But I’m not sure if all those men understand the responsibility that would come with it. I think very few men witb that preference are in a position to have an agreeable woman in that sense where the relationship would actually last.

The nuance I suppose with this is even if both the man and woman have equal say in a decision, someone has to make the final decision if the man and woman disagree. So then the question is who should have that final say? Someone has to be able to otherwise a decision may never get made.

I also think the men who want an agreeable woman in the sense of the literal definition probably aren’t putting on their dating profiles that they want an agreeable woman. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think men generally want a pleasurable woman who is willing to agree on things. So it probably isn’t very necessary to point out that preference.

Holden_Frame · 2023-02-07T05:50:54+00:00

Here's an example from a past relationship.

A new Chik-Fil-A opened up down the street. We were both pretty excited about it.

We had made plans to go to a nice dinner at a sea food place, but before this she drank some weird "digestive aid" concoction (that she invented herself) which caused her to vomit and have stomach issues.

I was disappointed because I had flown in to visit and this was a special occasion dinner, but I understood fully. I emphasized to her that it was all ok, and that her health is the priorty. I was as comforting as I possibly could be.

I got her into bed, got her a bucket to throw up in if she needed it, brought her water.

She didn't have thermometer, so I told her I would go to Walgreens to get one for her, and also pick up some antacid / pepto / etc, but that I needed to eat along the way.

I went and got all her stuff, and on the way back noticed the Chick Fil A was open, and I was starving so I went.

I ate on the way, and when I got back I brought her all her stuff, and was getting her meds ready when I mentioned I had stopped by the Chick Fil A.

She started screaming at me and crying about how "selfish" I was for "going without her" (a place she'd been to before btw). She didn't talk to me for the rest of the night and remained bitchy through the weekend. Keep in mind, this was after our dinner got cancelled, and while I was going out to buy her meds / supplies with my own money.

THAT is what "agreeable" is NOT, and there are a staggering amount of women who pull shit like that.

Yokowi · 2023-02-07T06:13:02+00:00

Female here. I see it as pleasant to be around. Non-bitchy if you will. Not a doormat. Just pleasant.

2023-02-07T06:57:01+00:00

Just being normal and not put your small anxieties and neuroticism front and center of the relationship.

You know when a dude ruins the whole date because he can't drop how friendly you were with the waiter? That's you when you push a dude on small shit.

Now as a red pill dude I get it, you want to see some man come out and play and you learned that being a cunt gets the arsehole out. But even forr arseholes that's tiresome and overplayed. Only dudes that have no real love for your personality and only want the chemistry will put up with that constant expectation of - show me your fangs daddy - every day after a hard day at work.

And I say neuroticism because it's genuinely a mental health issue. If you go to a good therapist(a behavioral one, not a talk one) he will walk you through the same line of introspection: is that topic important, do you want to make that evening that night about that topic? Is this a pattern you do regularly? What resolution are you expecting from this pattern?

_demidevil_ · 2023-02-07T12:00:10+00:00

“Agreeable” = easy to manipulate. BUT should that woman be manipulated in to an abusive relationship she is suddenly to blame for not leaving and agreeing to that treatment….

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despisedlove2 · 2023-02-07T02:48:36+00:00

Women tend to have more agreeable personalities than men. Given that the ad mentions feminine, asking for agreeable is just redundant.

Of course, if a woman hates the idea of being considered agreeable, she isn't relationship material anyways. The chip on that woman's shoulder will always get in the way.

md8716 · 2023-02-07T05:48:52+00:00

There are a lot of people out there that simply can't just chill the fuck out and go with the flow. Like let's say we go on a road trip. Being agreeable means you're not going sit there and micromanage the schedule, fight every petty battle or disagreement, or need to feel informed and in control the entire time.

This trait is not as common as you'd think, and a lot of people try to conflate it with being a pushover because maybe they feel seen or something, idk.

Nihi1986 · 2023-02-07T03:21:58+00:00

Dunno, something bad cause I girl I was seeing told me I was too agreeable🤷 so I suppose it's a bad thing, I guess I was exuding beta energy.

Then I also had a date where the girl smiled and told me 'you are very agreeable! And wanted something serious...

Anyway...agreeable: useful beta slave / boring, lazy no drama boyfriend. It means one of those two things depending on the person who evaluates you.

Edit: the one who called me too agreeable was because we met when she wanted, where she wanted, and went to have dinner where she wanted and I agreed even with the dishes. Well, she wanted waffles, I like waffles too, and they are cheap, so why the fuck would I disagree with your idea of getting waffles...?😑

Safinated · 2023-02-07T03:31:56+00:00

Doesn’t argue, disagree, discuss or fight

DryOutcome3407 · 2023-02-07T04:41:49+00:00

Able to easily reach common ground

BrummieAMN19 · 2023-02-07T08:44:52+00:00

That guys a PUA, I know so cause that comes from this YT channel I used to watch and he got his bio from him lol and I use parts of it too.

NationalistGoy · 2023-02-07T15:05:05+00:00

No arguments so going for the username. Honey if I cared what people think of my username I wouldn't have used it.

22IsThisIt22 · 2023-02-07T17:51:47+00:00

A pipe dream. Modern women are proud to be "boss bitches" who "need no man". And then they wonder why they share their life with a pet in stead of another human. Modern women are even so deluded, they think that being disagreeable is a positive quality.

Mustbeaight · 2023-02-07T03:04:21+00:00

He’s 6’3 . It doesn’t matter what he says

statsfodder · 2023-02-07T12:41:36+00:00

Perfect bait for all the toxic feminists to rear their heads.. well done.

DicamVeritatem · 2023-02-07T02:59:55+00:00

It means not being a ball breaker.

Thekurdishprince · 2023-02-07T02:38:34+00:00

Idk he probably added it to provoke some people on dating apps or even to filter. Agreeableness simply means taking the back seat in the relationship while he leads! I know this is not a popular opinion but as a man you either lead the relationship or it will not work out long term since every fucking decision need equal input and all the equality feminist nonsense.

Personally, i would advice the guy to remove agreeableness for better results because even if a woman is agreeable her feminist brainwashing will get her offended by that. Also his last sentence is great i use the same one but obviously not french just another language

Cannonball_21 · 2023-02-07T13:39:53+00:00

It means don't question my decisions or actions. Don't disagree with me. Don't have any problems.

Puzzleheaded_Joke394 · 2023-02-07T14:29:26+00:00

Uh oh stinkyyyy...Another no no word we can't use

CriticalPolitical · 2023-02-07T16:59:41+00:00

Omelette du fromage

FlyV89 · 2023-02-07T17:14:35+00:00

That he doesn't like women who have an opinion about everything.

And I mean... I have to agree.

I don't want to hear a woman's opinion. Should I be forced to just because I'm having sex with her?

I swear I would kill myself.

I'm currently dating four women. I don't think I've ever asked any of them "what they thought about..."

Reasonable-Steak1848 · 2023-02-07T17:58:46+00:00

I'm the biggest disagreeable person. I don't even try to be i just am 😭🤣

Educational-Ad6210 · 2023-02-07T18:32:23+00:00

Any man who wants a woman to be agreeable and understands what exactly it means is looking to exploit her. That’s what agreeableness means - willingness to get exploited.

A lot of people here confuse disagreeable and volatile/hysterical. A disagreeable woman will not go out of her way to start shit nor will she be aggressive. You will not necessarily figure out that she is disagreeable on the first date, she can actually come off as very sweet.

If she raises her voice or is being all bitchy for no reason - she is volatile. Calm her down and tell her you acknowledge her fears/feelings or some shit, don’t start arguing with a neurotic person, they need support and assurance because they are probably scared and defensive, not combative.

kimkarbashian · 2023-02-07T20:51:55+00:00

Placcid

givesmeconniptionfit · 2023-02-07T20:54:30+00:00

Women are, on a balance of probabilities, naturally more agreeable than men. The problem is, agreeableness has been heavily stigmatized by feminists, because disagreeableness gets shit done when change needs to be made. Now that there isn't much gender inequality, it should be a time for masculine/feminine dynamism, so that both genders can display both masculine and feminine traits to suit their needs.

Unfortunately, most women read statements like this as if the men want them locked in a basement when they're not needed. All they're actually doing is suggesting they want someone that can be submissive when the moment is right

KikiYuyu · 2023-02-07T21:13:02+00:00

I know what agreeable means as a word in the dictionary, but I know it could mean different to different people.

For example, how do I know that for this guy it doesn't mean "door mat"? I'm not going to assume that's what he means, but I have no way of confirming that it isn't what he means either. So now I have to worry about that until it's resolved.

FadedTony · 2023-02-08T01:06:42+00:00

Non confrontational but not necessarily a "push over"

Weird_Stick_2962 · 2023-02-08T07:26:32+00:00

It means that he wants someone who is submissive, will blindly follow him, and never challenge him without expecting him to prove that he’s capable of leading. I would consider this a red flag and move on to the next. Not even worth the time in my opinion.

RocinanteCoffee · 2023-02-08T22:25:23+00:00

If it's in a dating PPD context?

Likely to not 'rock the boat' even if the boat should be rocked.

Likely to defer to the other person in the room, put their pleasure before their own, sometimes without negative effect, sometimes with detriment to their own well-being and the well-being of other vulnerable/agreeable types in the vicinity.

snsjsthrowj · 2023-02-11T06:41:07+00:00

Agreeable translates as submissive to me......

anonymous-platypus1 · 2023-02-13T06:52:08+00:00

6’3 lol

Title	What does agreeable mean to you?
Author	anonymous-platypus1
Upvotes	40
Comments	269
Date	February 7, 2023 1:42 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/10vousz/what_does_agreeable_mean_to_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-does-agreeable-mean-to-you.1151691 https://theredarchive.com/post/1151691

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