Is the PUA community basically dead?

putcoolusernamehere · 2022-07-13T16:19:14+00:00

I’d say the idea that there needs to be a “pua” community or even the term “pua” at all is dead. Modern advice is focused way more on self development and internal growth

Medical-Weird-2444 · 2022-07-13T15:18:52+00:00

I would say yes is dead. But game didnt change so the old stuff have still value in them.

BV_Matters · 2022-07-13T15:18:58+00:00

[permanently deleted]

itsamatterofattitude · 2022-07-13T15:41:56+00:00

It wouldn't say it's dead, but it's definitely on life support. The biggest difference is the advent of online dating and apps. Before, PUA was about going out and making approaches. Now, it's focused has shifted to creating a profile that'll generate the most matches/likes, text game, and how to escalate as fast as possible.

It's less about the psychology and art of PUA, and more about cheap tricks and click bait tactics.

These_Invite · 2022-07-13T17:34:54+00:00

Well let me tell you my story, just kind of throwing this out there. In 2012 I got divorced, from what I've been reading. I guess that was a really good time to be in to pick up. I went on a string of bad dates and started learning about the community. I didn't pay anything, I just read and watched a lot of free stuff about game, and creating interest, and just kind of generally learning about how to make a first date to go well. For me it was never about getting as many numbers and as many girls as I'm possibly could, it was just learning about how to make a first date go well, meeting someone I wanted to be with. And it worked. The pickup community for some reason is hated by the incel community, which I've never understood. I mean if you want to get girls it's not being celibate, then wouldn't you want to learn game? I mean literally the answer to that problem is staring them in the face and they hate it. Whatever. That's all I got to say about that

SoumarRu · 2022-07-13T19:14:52+00:00

Gen Z is really different, they grew up using Instagram, TikTok, snapshot and almost everything happens online.

Success with women nowadays means having a very good instagram profile with pictures showing high value and social proof and sending likes, dm's and replying to stories.

This is not easy for the average man because height, looks, social status, matter more than ever and the competition is extremely high.

And also covid years changed a lot of things. People are afraid to get close to each-others and starting a conversation.

also Fear of being accused of harassment and destroyed reputation.

GordonGecko69 · 2022-07-13T21:04:27+00:00

Real PUAs never die out. They just move on when they can’t go out 6 nights a week anymore. I got into the game in 2003, a little before the book The Game came out. That caused a HUGE influx of wannabe’s. Some crossed over to real deal Mack daddies. Some moved on. Being a committed real deal PUA kinda takes over your life.

I got out of the game when I met my wife. We are still married now. I came to this group like the old ass MF I am to try to give sagely advice. What I have gotten is some of the most vaginal punk shit in response to my comments, so much so that I stopped commenting as much. The savages are fewer and farther between and what is left is a bunch of man buns who are all up in their feelings. The PUA community was never about getting to know someone on a personal level or making real and lasting connections. It was about getting laid. It isn’t about being yourself or any of that crap. Being yourself was why MF were virgins and seeking out the PUA community in the first place.

And contrary to what was said, the game did not get played out and women did not start seeing through it. Yeah, you got the book and the reality show and all that crap. But it’s less about a specific script and more about understanding the concepts. If you play chess and do the same opening moves, eventually that shit stops working. Do you stop playing chess or do you find another opening move?

As I said, i am happily married and I don’t color outside the lines. But I can say that I have used the same tactics I used to use to get laid nearly every day in business and other areas. The dynamics are the same.

DestinyChitChat · 2022-07-13T15:48:52+00:00

Imma vet. Been doing it since 2009. I'm married now but game fundamentals never change.

Lots of these guys are either hardcore into direct method and think there's no point in learning or they are full of anxiety and overanalyze everything down to the emojis.

Beginning-Ad-8041 · 2022-07-13T16:18:37+00:00

Still some good coaches left, after RSD got canceled that was kinda it for organized pickup at least for a while, those coaches are kinda like islands all to themselves

Most that are left are very good as the content of what they teach is more practical and effective

I can’t speak for other cities but Vegas still has a very strong scene as I took a bootcamp in November and it was really good

MrDownhillRacer · 2022-07-13T18:52:55+00:00

Yeah, I'd say PUA is dying.

Even though one can do PUA without being a greasy, creepy slimeball, there has always been an uncomfortable amount of overlap between it and greasy, creepy slimeballs that have kind of painted the entire thing in the public eye. So, with more people talking about very important issues like harassment and sexual violence, the whole movement has kinda been under heat, and a lot of the internet PUA guys have re-branded as "life coaches," something more palatable in this era. They've stopped giving advice on how to get laid and have scrubbed their content on it from the internet. One can be interested in learning how to get laid more without being the sort of person who mistreats or has unhealthy views of women, but because the wider world doesn't really comprehend that fact, scrubbing the PUA content is better for optics, which is unfortunate for people who aren't slimeballs but still want to access resources on improving their skills at getting laid.

Also, on communities such as this, you have far more inexperienced people looking for advice than experienced people sharing advice. You often have the blind leading the blind. I myself am no expert or guru, so I'd like to be able to come here and get tips from people who are more experienced than I am. But most times, I come across people even less experienced than I am, and also people giving out terrible advice. I feel like user flairs might help in that respect, but at the same times, how would mods verify that a user is really the sex machine he claims he is?

YouGotTangoed · 2022-07-13T16:40:59+00:00

If you want to see why/how this happened, just go on r/dating. Any mention of anything slightly out of the norm, and you’ll get downvoted to hell, or kicked out

CompetitionFair7686 · 2022-07-13T16:15:14+00:00

You are literally in a PUA forum even if it’s not called PUA, and instead called seduction.

The only thing that died is mystery method because game theory has evolved beyond some of his most absurd ideas (like negging or peacocking), but core principles (High value, Qualification, Seduction, Kino, Empathy, Escalation) are still intact.

etherealromance · 2022-07-13T17:56:44+00:00

It’s not dead cuz I still go out six nights a week haha

Krouser1522 · 2022-07-13T17:51:25+00:00

Pretty much most of the coaches are not active anymore but there is still plenty of the teachings you can find it. But it’s much harder to find the good advice since many of them went underground.. PUA helped me a lot back in the day a lot of the younger guys just don’t have access to the same resources I had which sucks because I know so many guys legitimately need the help

red__what · 2022-07-13T22:01:15+00:00

I cannot stress the importance of in-person approach.

It is a cheat code (ToddV said it) and it puts power back in the hand of men and not an algorithm.

Can vouch.

Handle-me-timber · 2022-07-13T16:29:04+00:00

It’s an outdated system. The new model is self improvement and social awareness. It’s basically become the equivalent of being labeled a feminist as a woman these days.

cancertable · 2022-07-13T18:09:12+00:00

Definitely regressed after RSD flushed their Facebook pickup communities down the drain. There is still some good content coming out of jeffy as he’s the only one that seems like he still cares about game overall. All of them still do boot camps and stuff but it’s kind of under wraps.

Tyler’s self development teachings are still framed through the lens of success with women and they’re pretty good.

Honestly their social circle/ig clout strategy is so effective now in this day and age.

John Anthony lifestyle still gives good tips but it’s mostly online game as it’s the most effective way to get women imo.

sorry4beingawkward · 2022-07-14T03:10:41+00:00

What’s PUA? I’m trying to use context clues but yeah still not sure.

celestial-kitty2 · 2022-07-13T17:12:12+00:00

The “me too” movement killed it

1keentolearn12 · 2022-07-13T15:20:23+00:00

Most instructors have become lifestyle teachers now

ThatGuy_Nick9 · 2022-07-13T15:33:30+00:00

It’s still alive but it’s evolving. A lot of monetization has flooded the industry and a lot of PUA “professionals” are just trying to sell product and gather clicks. You see a lot of “buy my book where I explain how I got to bang 2 new chicks everyday for ten years and you can too.” Also, day-gaming is much less appealing now as women have been fairly clear that random men approaching them in public is scary for them. I feel like most PUA is just content now. Now the community is flooded with “incels” who use fundamentals of seduction as a way to justify or excuse their rage, scammers/hustlers just trying to sell a book, and the majority of people who are just quietly learning seduction in their own practice.

Titfortatertot · 2022-07-13T23:07:05+00:00

God I hope so

Freevoulous · 2022-07-14T10:54:52+00:00

the newest cohort of men (low 20s) are very culturally different: more fatalistic, more effeminate, easy giving up. THe PUA movement rose in the 1990s where Self-Improvement was the new religion for men. Now its self-pity, and learned helplessness.

CantaloupeFamiliar47 · 2022-07-14T14:54:30+00:00

PUAs are shadowbanned out of existence because the woke overloads (tech giants and their platforms) decided that being attracted to women is sexist. Anyone who tries to post PUA content on modern platforms gets shadowbanned.

AKA what happened to RSD, other big dating companies.

Also... Social media has changed the game. Instagram, OnlyFans, TikTok let's the top 1% of attractive / wealthy guys directly access beautiful women. These wealthy guys can invite 15 or 20 beautiful women that they've never met off of Instagram to an all expenses paid vacation, which has never been possible before.

If you're a really beautiful girl, you could probably DM a celebrity, wealthy guy, or high status guy and most likely get a response.

The most attractive 1% of men and women have such an unbelievable amount of abundance it's hard to comprehend.

poly_nerdy_panda · 2022-07-13T18:32:48+00:00

RSD made and killed PUA because their "tactics" didn't get anyone success. Mystery never grew his game, all the other "players" just try to book boot camps for 4k a person and mostly by default become marketers not PUA's.. the only good guy in the community left is John Anthony.. I would say Adam Lyons but he is now a marketer as well

Matty2Phones · 2022-07-13T16:50:58+00:00

Along came Tinder and DMs and “Mystery” was not very cool anymore. The Game, the most shop lifted book at Barnes and Noble in all of history

donaldtrumpsmistress · 2022-07-13T19:53:20+00:00

Depending on where you're at there's still a bunch of active telegram groups. As with everything else in the community, 80% unhinged weirdos, but I've met some cool dudes through them.

mabden · 2022-07-13T20:30:41+00:00

Just like Video Killed the Radio Star, Internet Killed the PUA.

attlif · 2022-07-13T22:28:28+00:00

OP, married now divorced? It’s a different world, have fun.

Beneficial-Tip-4044 · 2022-07-13T23:27:11+00:00

id say the whole cancel culture took over, basically bunch of women gather around online and shit talk about these PUA's and ruin their pages

Beneficial-Tip-4044 · 2022-07-13T23:30:12+00:00

id say the whole cancel culture took over, basically bunch of angry girls gathered online to shit talk anything that they disliked. PUA's being one of their main ones

dryo · 2022-07-14T01:08:04+00:00

I'm your age, and also was into PUA 10 years ago, I could tell you by experience that, since 2012, a lot changed, there was a lot info out there, an everyone was pouring in the same peacocking nonesense, so, Sasha Day game started uploading infield videos, plenty of guys turned to Day game, since I'm already taken, can't tell if women have become more defensive about it or not.

Also, the game has shifted through different lines of seduction communication, Tinder and Bumble and then take the leads through text.

Now, the algorithm in those apps got exposed recently, it favors the best looking and shadow bans users even if they have premium on, so picking up numbers and effective texting is still the way to go these days, no need for "PUA jargon anymore" the whole scene has become more discrete and direct.

biokaizen · 2022-07-14T13:22:26+00:00

60% men dont know what to talk with girls on tinder or whatever, I did lot of fakes girls profiles though my life and the average men is so patetic, they only know to ask questions.

Pua community is necessary for average men to improve the online conversation with women or face to face

Chicagoj1563 · 2022-07-14T14:18:03+00:00

One thing I noticed is when some of the influencers started getting attacked and shut down, lots of people started creating private communities. They are out there, but you wouldn't know about them. guys are more serious and there is usually a few who actively cold approach and post field reports. So, I think its more underground now.

Add to that, there is less awareness of the old school ideas. Many guys now are drifting back to its all about looks, read models, etc...

The big one these days is guys thinking everything has changed because of tinder and online apps, they develop a looser mentality. If you work on yourself, learn game/social skills, learn to be attractive in person, none of the app culture matters. But, guys will keep complaining as if the dating world has come to and end. The apps and social media are irrelevant if you have good game. If you can convey you are a really attractive man in person, women will respond. Apps are for average guys, not high status men who have worked on themselves and learned game.

Its sad, but the content is still out there if you look for it. Hopefully a new larger community will develop at some point. After RSD folded, it really killed alot of the momentum.

burakbenxd · 2022-07-14T18:01:53+00:00

I wouldn't say pick up is entirely dead. I read the book Mystery published, and it had some good pointers. But, it's sort of out-dated, but the core concepts can be utilized for 2022. The emergence of OLD really eliminated a lot of practical PUA strategies. Like the idea of attraction ---> comfort ---> seduction, kino, social value, etc still hold a lot of value. That's primarily why I like cold approaching. When you approach a girl has literally like 2 seconds to decide whether she's going to say, 'sorry I have a boyfriend, or I'm not interested in talking'.

I personally still cold approach because most guys make a tinder account, and swipe left and right. So, attractive girls may get approached in a lot of bars/clubs, but in day-time the amount of guys that have the balls to go up is low.

Now, if you're an absolute creep, you'll be escorted out of the premis where you're day gaming, or get in trouble. Either way, I wouldn't say I'm a PUA, but, I know what I'm doing when I cold approach. And I don't do online dating, fuck that.

SharpAd3703 · 2022-07-15T02:39:38+00:00

Playing with fire interviews Adam Lions Two weeks ago. https://youtu.be/twTrrGiRXtY

18cmOfGreatness · 2022-07-20T05:31:28+00:00

PUA movement was destroyed by feminism. It started from the fall of RSD and now pickup is replaced by "self-development", which isn't a bad thing actually. There a lot of resources on youtube.

Few_Sheepherder9554 · 2022-08-09T18:48:11+00:00

Does anyone has the course STREET ATTRACTION APPROACH TO LAY by STREET ATTRACTION

Beezus333 · 2022-07-14T00:31:04+00:00

Dude nowadays these girls could care less about pickup lines, they literally want their cake and wanna eat it too! Most girls in the dating field are scandalous whores str up. Just think about it for one sec, only fans exist, 10 years ago that shit wasn’t around. This is a new age my friend, and men like you need real talk. And tbh Reddit is notorious for liberal leftist bs lies that push femine 💩 like what I’m saying is misogyny, 😂 let them ban this comment to prove what I’m saying is truth! 💯

eszibit · 2022-07-13T15:18:45+00:00

People grew up

Shrodax · 2022-07-13T16:16:48+00:00

I think they all converted to fundamentalist Christianity and/or pivoted into alt-right politics...

BravoPUA · 2022-07-13T17:11:16+00:00

I still teach full time, things just pivoted for me from boot camps to private 1on1’s. Because no one wants others to know they had to learn this stuff/associated it with.

There really never was a “community”. There were forums and small groups of guys around the US /world that would meet up…but most learned what they needed too and moved on.

Silly to be going to PUA meet ups when you have a family at home.

distawest · 2022-07-13T20:12:49+00:00

The old guard is not active anymore, but the game never dies!

Game principles are eternal, like the 10 commandments ... follow them and thy prosper

Otec_Fedor · 2022-07-13T15:26:21+00:00

It's all about looks now. Just be attractive, use dating apps and don't be "weird" whatever the fuck that means

cronasminate · 2022-07-13T20:05:12+00:00

There was never a PUA community. It was just an industry full of coaches who tried to scam lonely young men into spending 5k on a pointless bootcamp. Now that they've scammed most of everyone, there's no more money in it since the majority of the market has been saturated and cooled down, so less scammer are keeping it active.

You'll still see some blog spammers and coaches on here who are too dumb to realize that the money has moved on.

redvelvet_oreo · 2022-07-13T20:29:10+00:00

It seems to me, everyone seen the PC police closing in, and shifted gears or the smart ones did.

Gotta keep the money coming in.

But regardless the core concepts for picking up women are the same and they will always work because of the nature of women.

You don’t need a script, this isn’t a sale, in sales every sale is supposed to be the same process more or less.

In pick up the key is stimulating a girls emotions, every girls is different and responds to different things , but they all are emotional.

I always cultivated game being in the moment. Get the best results and I also feel the best because I’m living in it vs rehearsing what I am doing.

PullHerMando · 2022-07-14T01:04:32+00:00

Being fake made the leaders feel like shit so they changed lol.

Saz_0618 · 2022-07-13T16:45:19+00:00

No dating in general is dead. As a man you can be accused of the most heinous crimes from just cold approaching women. So why take the risk of ruining your entire life? Not to mention I was raped and sexually harassed at my job by women, so I’m just completely checked out, but that’s my opinion.

ResponsibilityKey427 · 2022-07-13T19:06:12+00:00

Dating apps and ig killed it.

But honestly dating apps is the most efficient way to get hookups.

Which is what young men want.

cormacru999 · 2022-07-14T01:03:41+00:00

I certainly hope so. It was dumb as best & open harassment at worst. I'll say this over & over, stop asking other men to teach you how to interact with women - start paying attention to what women say about interacting with men. Men love to think only some men are bad, you'll often see men tell women that they must have been dating boys instead of men, but the reality is men's behavior is pretty bad, men are deeply fragile & resistant to growth, especially the ones who send me hate mail to prove I'm wrong. lol

PossessionSecret3195 · 2022-07-13T16:51:57+00:00

New to this …..but can anyone please explain what is PUA or daygame ….these terms are not usually used in my country.

Secrecy_Guaranteed · 2022-07-13T16:55:32+00:00

Dead? How so? Pua is game and game is interacting with people. A lot of guys went to social circle game and online. But approaching girls in a club is timeless. Day game may be rarer, but still ongoing just because you don't want to lose the opportunity of approaching someone you will never see again.

MO_drps_knwldg · 2022-07-13T16:59:52+00:00

Yes, being an attractive person with developed social skills is what matters, it’s what’s always mattered.

Pickup artists have now rebranded themselves as “Dating” or lifestyle coaches.

Live-Ad-6309 · 2022-07-13T19:55:11+00:00

Yeah. PUA has become very niche since most of the big fish got scared away by media smear campaigns

trevboyardeez · 2022-07-13T22:48:49+00:00

they moved over to r/cringe

Vespe50 · 2022-07-13T19:01:41+00:00

Majority of them are in jail for sexual crimes, I suppose...

AlphabeticalMedical · 2022-07-13T20:11:27+00:00

Not dead. Just need to know where to look. Big community on twitter

DatingCoachSebastian · 2022-07-13T20:38:07+00:00

It’s not dead man, it’s still there. It’s just not as prominent as it used to be because of the times that we are living in. Plenty of cool you tube channels out there with solid pua’s - check out leading man attraction 👊🏻

PlayaLarga · 2022-07-14T15:58:54+00:00

PUA never really worked. It was just people selling you fantasies. It all got exposed years back. Now men are learning to just work on themselves to better attract partners.

beenpimpin · 2022-08-15T07:36:10+00:00

Unfortunately PUA effectively boils down to harassment especially when becomes cultish like it did 10 years ago, hundreds of guys in my city alone were out 7 days a week approaching strangers and saying the most outlandish shit to game them. One dude was straight up approaching girls and telling them he wants f*** them in the ass because PUA coaches taught him you have say crazy shit to spark her interest.

SeanBatemanJr · 2022-07-13T17:23:33+00:00

My hope is that smart stuff from the community was integrated into society at large and bad stuff, like over-thinking, over-gaming, delusions of being special and superior because of possessing «secret knowledge», was discarded.

VikrantBh · 2022-07-13T19:52:54+00:00

What are thr best practices guidelines and books to follow, I am bit new to the game just haven't done it in 12 years.

Vanhelsing2020 · 2022-07-13T21:44:26+00:00

There will always be a market for men helping other men to get women.

Even the best guys out here only close 10 percent of anything they approach. Point being, it's not easy to have sex with lots of women as men.

Men have to have done something that pre qualifies them in the eyes of women (6:66 etc) . Women don't have to do anything, just be hot.

Billion dollar industries are built around men not being able to get sex from women. The strip club business would not exist if sex was easy for most men to attain. Porn would not be as popular as it is. Only fans as well.

Its not called the pua community anymore, but you better believe what ever they call it now... It's still very alive and well.

Like_My_Turkey_Cold · 2022-07-13T22:44:42+00:00

Settled down / met the kind of girl that early PUA me would've loved to have dated. I still help my friends all the time with it, but I myself have been out of it for the past few years.

masszt3r · 2022-07-13T23:16:56+00:00

Pandemic unemployment assistance?

ccrispy333 · 2022-07-14T02:18:08+00:00

did you get any you-know-what?

TheEkoz98 · 2022-07-14T03:32:59+00:00

Is simple pick up still around…

theweird_blonde · 2022-07-14T08:26:20+00:00

I’m sorry what is PUA? Could someone explain?

Curia-DD · 2022-07-14T13:42:41+00:00

I really hope so!!!

Jewellinius · 2022-07-14T17:08:29+00:00

Todd V and theres also a guy named Mike Mehlman, and Summers, Tusk, King Col, bunch of other guys, so i think its not.

MetronTheCollector · 2022-07-15T00:42:39+00:00

A lot of factors killed the PUA movement. Here are just 4 of them:

ONE - There was no qualification to become a pick up coach. Any guy could take a few pics with random women in clubs, upload them to a website, then call himself a coach and start charging thousands of dollars. Students had bad experiences with these fake teachers, so they left the community and told others to stay away. In other industries like accounting, it's regulated and a person needs at least 6 years to become qualified (3 years at uni, 3 years to do CPA). The dating coaching industry isn't regulated like that.

TWO - Too much bad information. A lot of these fake gurus would write books or make video courses that didn't teach anything useful, and sometimes even made guys worse. While there are a few good sources of information in the PU industry, most are useless. This ruins the reputation of the industry.

THREE - Online dating lead to less guys cold approaching and using PUA.

FOUR - A lot of guys who joined the community did it to give themselves a new identity and fill a hole in their existence. The problem is doing this makes you worse as you place too much pressure on yourself around women. The best way to become good at connecting with women is to have something better to do than chasing women. Guys who already had an identity like writer, engineer, etc, who joined this just to learn social skills could get results if they found the right resources. But a lot of guys joined this to make being a 'player' their identity and source of self esteem. And that only leads to failure.

ToHelp3897 · 2022-07-24T05:54:11+00:00

I dont think PUA community died, I think it just transformed into something. Like, I would say the self improvement community is the new transformation of that.

IntovertPartyHardy · 2022-08-06T16:30:04+00:00

Figure it out yourself. We could be talking about lemon bars instead.

kannitt0 · 2022-08-08T05:11:50+00:00

Excuse me guys, what does PUA stand for?

Title	Is the PUA community basically dead?
Author	BV_Matters
Upvotes	250
Comments	355
Date	July 13, 2022 3:16 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/vy5nvz/is_the_pua_community_basically_dead/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/is-the-pua-community-basically-dead.1254576 https://theredarchive.com/post/1254576

Comments