Men simply want virgin women because of security and feeling of being special.

autistic_cool_kid · 2025-07-18T07:33:10+00:00

I'm going to be brutally honest. How can you say wanting a virgin partner is not related to feelings of insecurity and then write a whole post where every argument is based on insecurity and fear?

RegionComplete · 2025-07-18T10:55:26+00:00

Virgin adult women in the real world are nothing like unicorn fantasy you guys conjure up in your head.

badgersonice · 2025-07-18T11:13:20+00:00

If the way to make someone feel special is to be chaste and wait for that one person… then what you are arguing is that men who do not deliberately choose to stay chaste before her do not care about treating her like she’s special.

Isn’t obvious that if you feel that it’s critical for her to be a virgin for you to “feel special”, that you are telling her she’s nothing but another fuck hole if you have not diligently preserved your virginity on purpose?

So have you deliberately preserved your own chastity in order to make this virgin feel special?

I’ll also point out that most of the virgins you wanna fuck probably don’t care about making you feel special when you would never do the same for them. Most likely, you will only ever treat her like she’s just another used up napkin once you’ve fucked her. After all, she’s not a special special virgin anymore after you “ruin” her— she’s just one more worthless fuck hole to you after you take her virginity.

Edit to add: your perspective is merely a cultural viewpoint, and it’s pretty alien to westerners to view a woman as unforgivably ruined by having sex. Even centuries ago, the Christian west did not support your view that sex makes a woman disgusting, unforgivably unclean, and unmarriageable.

Unfair_Detective_993 · 2025-07-18T06:51:15+00:00

Please cite sources or examples for no.3:

How will an animal identify a low body count animal?
Why doesn’t evolution simply encourage the Bruce effect in females?

How do you think your reasons rank against the theory that humans are serial monogamists, and not lifelong monogamists?

day_dreamzzz_ · 2025-07-18T06:50:53+00:00

The problem is that most men would never wait til marriage if they actually do meet a virgin woman.

No-Ad8127 · 2025-07-18T07:56:35+00:00

Men do not want virgin women. Even young men of average age 21 preferred women with 1 sexual partner in her past over virgins, in a study on exactly that. This goes up with age. Young virgins prefer other young virgins.

This is from another study regarding sociosexuality and how it makes a difference in what kind of sexual partner count leads to what kind of willingness to form a relationship. Sociosexuality is about attitudes, behavior, and desire for sex outside of a committed relationship (broadly speaking). This is also for an average age of ~21. Sex partner count preferences or accepted ranges increase with age.

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Steamed_hams_ · 2025-07-18T08:10:36+00:00

man go outside and speak to people hey, internet has rotted your perception of women and the world.

No-Ad8127 · 2025-07-18T10:00:25+00:00

If a man thinks that a woman would stay loyal because she was a virgin when she met him, he’s in for a reality check. If we check the divorce rates, one of the most frequent demographics is women that married too young or married their first.

Artistic_Speech_1965 · 2025-07-18T06:44:08+00:00

Well, you know r/TwoXChromosomes is an echo chamber as well as other subbredits so don't expect seeing results of objective universal scientific studies in each post

In the other hand two men could want a virgin woman for completly different reasons

No-Hovercraft-455 · 2025-07-18T10:08:30+00:00

I don't know any women who actually bother to think back to their past sexual experiences, because once the bond that made them do it is gone so is the attraction to that memory. It's not validating to them, it's just unnecessary. I am sure that if you took a poll, mere mention of their ex's bits is going to make most women heave.

And I realise this (very obvious) bit of info isn't as clear to men as it is to women because I can see by their behaviour that they assume that same things about them that made her want them once somehow still work but by and large women don't work like that.

Also the statistical likelihood he gave her even a single orgasm is pretty low. So even if there was a woman who actually wants to think or remember their ex's bits even existing, you are safe with so little effort it's practically laughable. Even if there was a woman who actually had lot of sex probably most of it wasn't that spectacular and you have the advantage of having all the time in the world to figure out how to make it good for both of you, if it's long time commitment.

I think you guys are projecting your own shitty objectification of women on how you assume they will think of their ex (which in all likelihood they just won't because woman who is done with a man tends to really be done). Maybe have some empathy they need to put up with your lot and don't create more problems that don't actually exist, it will just make you nervous.

ZaneBradleyX · 2025-07-18T06:45:28+00:00

At the end of the day, it’s just a preference like any other. Whether someone desires a partner with 0, 1, 10, or 100 past partners, that’s their choice. Nothing is wrong with having a preference, as long as you’re not shaming people who don’t meet your standards.

fucksiclepizza · 2025-07-18T08:45:39+00:00

I don't know any dudes who want virgins, I certainly don't. Some of us have evolved beyond thinking as if we are animals.

flipsidetroll · 2025-07-18T07:46:13+00:00

Men can want whatever they want. No one is telling them otherwise. The difference is simply that they must hold themselves to the same standard they expect from women. You want a virgin? Then don’t go around fucking multiple women. You are instigating the cockfight if you sleep with multiple women who sleep with multiple men. Funny that your insecurities don’t show up then. Only when you want to relationship her, does it suddenly manifest. We call that bullshit.

r2k398 · 2025-07-18T06:43:03+00:00

I don’t want a virgin or the town bike.

PerfectWorking6873 · 2025-07-18T07:12:07+00:00

Boring 🥱. People like you are looking at each genders as if everyone is the same and cookie cutter made in a factory. With this sort of mentality you may as well just find one of the "products" that appeal to you physically and marry her. Because apparently as females we are all same same with no differences in mind and feelings between other women. We are just made and programmed in factory. Our physical has differences but the rest of us is just the same. Or better yet, just buy a sex robot who is programmed according to your factory stereotypes of women because then you won't even need to pay for her dinner, it will never complain to you etc.

As for virginity, that may have flew in the middle ages where women had no income. So it could have been "girl exchanges her youth, beauty and virginity for a rich husband who can give her lifestyle". But when are people like you going to realise that we are now in 2025 and not the middle ages and that women don't NEED your money? Most women have their own income. So we don't need to play the virginity card any more as a COMMODITY to get mens money/lifestyle. Women earn enough to live just fine. And few men are on the income level of millionaires or billionaires that we even need to in essence sell our virginity just to live in his mansion.

Again, most mean on Reddit are not millionaires with some exquisite ease lifestyle that we as women are trying to fight over.

So regardless how butt hurt and ego crushing it may feel to a man that his girlfriend has had sex with another man/s prior, he/you need to understand that this is 2025 and we arnt going backwards!

2025 means if you want a virgin then YOU need to also lead by example by also being a virgin! If I saved my self for marriage do you really think that I will marry a man who was a prior f"boi? No way 😎.

Sorry bro but you need to fix your incredibly insecure ego.

Particular-Set5396 · 2025-07-18T06:37:45+00:00

Are you 14? Because you sound like you are 14.

KayRay1994 · 2025-07-18T06:45:52+00:00

“Men” = you and the few very loud weirdos who agree with you.

Every argument you gave can be rebutted with a simple phrase: “grow up and get over it”

Outside_Memory5703 · 2025-07-18T06:38:34+00:00

No, men are quite up front that they don’t like other men touching their things

Especially with their dicks

Sex is dirty and bad, remember ?

IridikronsNo1Fan · 2025-07-18T06:36:54+00:00

The real reason is that lots of guys have 0 or less than 0 experience with sex and feel inadequate, or they are so awful at sex that they are not going to be compared favorably to anyone, ever. Instead of doing the responsible thing and getting good at sex, they double down.

Why even get into a relationship in the first place if you're going to be so puritanical about it?

throwawaytradesman2 · 2025-07-18T08:24:35+00:00

A few things here.

You make it sound binary between virgins and non virgins I'd say its more realistic to put into categories of women who've had casual sex and those that have only had sex in relationships.

2.

We all know in general men are the greatest losers of divorce.

People keep saying this on this sub but I still dont beleive it, its either even or if anything women come off much worse. For multiple reasons such as ageing is more likely to have reduced mate value of the woman than the man. The woman might now be a single mother which makes it harder to find a new partner. For the man having kids from a previous relationship is not as much of a negative for obvious reasons.

3.

"When men cheat women ask do you love her? And when women cheat men ask did you fuck him?"

This might be true but its nothing to do with men and women having some special insight its just because it speaks to our insecurirties women are insecure about men loving someone else and men are insecure about women finding someone more sexually attractive than them. IF anything it would make more sense from a practical sense if the questions were reversed.

A lot of your reasoning is about the idea of women comparing mens sexual performance and this is way way overstated. 99% of a womans enjoyment in sex comes from how much they love the man, not how good he is. IF she cheats with an ex its not because hes better in bed.

This is kind of a side point but media, online and everywhere is obsessed with sex style where the man is dominant and that dynamic gets all the attention but the vast majority of women don't actually like sex like that, some do, but most don't. Being good at sex with those normal women is not difficult it mainly comes down to being kind and not selfish in the bedroom.

day_dreamzzz_ · 2025-07-18T13:08:46+00:00

Yh…and???

That doesn’t change anything cos non virgin men and virgin men a like want premarital sex.

Unless a man is willing to wait TIL marriage he shouldn’t be taken seriously if this the opinion he has.

DietTyrone · 2025-07-18T14:23:11+00:00

I think the one part you're right about is that men want to feel special, they want to be the preference of the person they're with, not just the most convenient option at the moment or the backup plan. However, that's everyone. Women like to feel special too.

Where I disagree with you is that women need to be virgin as a requirement for men to feel special to that woman. It can be, don't get me wrong. But I think the majority of adult men could care less if the woman is a virgin. They'll care if she's a 304 though, and racking up a higher body count than John Wick.

Complete-Record5167 · 2025-07-18T18:22:18+00:00

Oh deer…what has the world come to??? A man wants to feel special to his wife/girlfriend. Sometimes the posts on here are a bit ridiculous. Why is it okay for a woman to want to feel special, but not a man.

midnight_blue77 · 2025-07-19T07:54:10+00:00

Let's cut all that jazz and get to the point:

Men prefer virgins and women with little sexual experience because they just come with a lot less baggage and aren't as jaded and screwed up as promiscuous women.

The "virgin" part is a lot more important for what it consists of between a woman's ears than what's between her legs.

It is not more complicated than that.

Leinadro · 2025-07-19T16:50:06+00:00

It's TwoXChromosomes. You may as well ask white supremacists about why black people have a preference for something.

NoDanaOnlyZuuI · 2025-07-19T17:24:56+00:00

Wanting a partner with similar values and lifestyle is valid. No one’s saying you have to date someone you’re not comfortable with. But let’s not pretend this is about compatibility when it’s clearly control and ego.

You’re masking insecurity, fear, and entitlement as “biology” or “male nature.” What you’re really saying is that a woman’s worth depends on how untouched she is. Gross. Virgins aren’t inherently more loyal, moral, or better partners, they’re just less experienced. And that makes you feel safer because you’re scared she might compare you to anyone who came before.

Comparing a woman’s sexual history to a man’s financial status is a false equivalence. Money can support a household. A “body count” can’t ruin one, unless your self-esteem is too fragile to accept that she had a life before you.

You’re not citing biology, you’re cherry picking fear based justifications to shame women for having autonomy. And those studies about partner count and divorce show correlation, not causation.

You want trust? Build it. You want loyalty? Earn it. But stop pretending your insecurity is some moral high ground

ComplexAttitude4Lyfe · 2025-07-19T22:07:55+00:00

Then when are men going to stop trying to sleep with every woman they date?

Because they are just as capable of not sleeping with women. It just appears men will totally cheer on another man sleeping around while saying women should remain virgins.

-Kalos · 2025-07-18T10:41:15+00:00

Only men with no experience want women with no experience.

Superb-Foundations · 2025-07-18T15:41:02+00:00

So.... you're insecure? Are you insecure about your manhood? Like... I'm so confused by the point of this post other than, "we want virgins so they have nothing to compare us too!" But when I told men I wait 6 months to have sex they overwhelmingly said I was a prude, thought I was special, or "no man would wait that long!". 😂😂

Then when men actually have sex with a virgin and she doesnt immediately orgasm from being jackhammered, like the women in porn, they are frigid.

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BigPhilip · 2025-07-18T12:17:48+00:00

TLDR

I am not a manwhore, so I wanted a woman who was celibate like me.

And I found her.

Other wimmin mad, but I don't care. LOL

EducationPatient4622 · 2025-07-18T13:21:22+00:00

Im a man and i dont want a virgin. Sex is going to be boring, AF. She knows nothing.

Plus, she has no clue on how to please a man physically and psychologically.

I wont generalise but i wont make a case based on exceptions either.

Adorable-Humor1107 · 2025-07-18T15:25:46+00:00

In my experience most times I’ve heard a guy complain about his girls body count it’s because he’s insecure I personally do not care and I will continue to not care a women with more experience in bed is a good thing if anything I’ve dated women with low body counts and I’ve dated women with high body counts I didn’t notice anything different between them other than personality pick your partner right and you won’t get your heart broken

ASnowfallOfCherry · 2025-07-18T16:04:07+00:00

Reason 1: women with multiple sexual partners cause more divorce than someone not. We all know in general men are the greatest losers of divorce. They are I general not good idea for a long term relationships for men.

And here is a evidence many already heard of but i know someone gonna say: "evidence?"

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10989935/

same for men, so men should pass on casual sex or premarital sex. Oh they won’t?

Reason 2: women with multiple sexual partners tend to bring moreinfidelity than women with less or none. No one wants to live with the thought of their partner have higher chance to cheat on them.

Sources:

https://np.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/00224499.2016.1145182?utm_source=chatgpt.com

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21675178/

same for men, so men should pass on casual or premarital sex. Oh they won’t?

Reason 3: women with multiple sexual partners bring more competition and danger to a man's life. How? She will mostly make a compression her current partner and past partners, idk any men who is comfortable with that.

> same for men, so men should pass on casual or premarital sex. Oh they won’t?

I’m not living my life based on what some hypothetical man in the future might think. Neither do men.

preferablyno · 2025-07-18T16:34:47+00:00

I honestly don’t understand how anyone doesn’t like party girl types better so much more fun lol

Virginal girl seems like a path to a dead bedroom

ThatBitchA · 2025-07-18T16:44:19+00:00

If a man wants a virgin because of "security" and "feeling special," that tells me he's bad in bed and he doesn't want me to know that he's bad in bed.

A man wanting a virgin, specifically, tells me he doesn't know where or what the clit is or know anything about foreplay.

So those kinds of men aren't ones most women aren't interested in anyway. Especially the virgins.

2025-07-18T16:54:27+00:00

The people who post about wanting to sleep with virgins have obviously never slept with one. The sex is usually awful and many times doesn't get much better.

Sophiatab · 2025-07-18T19:59:27+00:00

Adult virgin women don't want inferior men. So if a man wants a virgin wife, he better be prepared to offer something way above average. Whether that's voluntary virginity on his part, physical appearance, social status, wealth, or most likely a combination of all these qualities, its going to have to be as exceptional as she is.

2025-07-18T20:22:33+00:00

First: No, it's not a universal preference as others have pointed out.

Second: You can have any preferences you want. I don't even think you have to be a virgin yourself to want a virgin for a partner.

Just a few points to consider: - The lower divorce rate for virgin women can very likely be explained by religiosity. (Otherwise, it doesn't really make sense e.g. that the divorce rate for women with two partners is higher than that for those up until 9 partners). - Religiosity is a whole lifestyle. Remaining a virgin for religious reasons indicates that the virgin person takes their religion quite serious. It will be difficult if their parents doesn't share the belief. - Wanting a virginious woman for non religious reasons (as the ones given by you) would've been a red flag for me, even when I still was a virgin. Why? Because your reasons reek of insecurity due to low self-esteem and/or a proness to anxiousness. At best that's just unattractive, at worst it poses the risk of controlling behaviour inside a relationship. - Your partner may be as inexperienced as you want, it's likely that your anxiety will still reek it's ugly head. Then you have a problem with her fantasising about another guy and looking at them in the wrong way. - Romantic relationships are never fully secure. She can always fall out of love or develop a crush on someone else. While it's important to not be a doormat and overly naive, trying to get a false sense of security isn't the way either. - If you marry a virgin, the likelihood that you'll be sexually incompatible is just higher (you're buying the cat in the sack) - If someone manages to abstain from sex for an extended time and it's not for religious reasons, it's more likely that sex just isn't that important to them, i.e. your getting yourself a low libido partner.

YeaNobody · 2025-07-19T00:56:30+00:00

I never cared about whether or not a girl was a virgin.....if anything it was a negative really.

Puzzleheaded_ghost · 2025-07-19T03:22:12+00:00

For me, it's very simple - success in LTR drops significantly when the body count exceeds 5. I don't care how many men you fuck, but I do care if you leave me. Pain, you know, that matters.

This virgin, this tradition that. Yes, there are biological reasons for ensuring paternity. Gene tests are sufficient it a woman agrees to it.

Try being a kid in a broken white trash family. Then you'll understand. It's the kids who pay.

sweetbunnyblood · 2025-07-19T05:26:16+00:00

I think it's just biological

Prize_Willow_5325 · 2025-07-19T06:39:07+00:00

You need to correct your grammar and spelling, it makes this unreadable.

LaManoInvsible · 2025-07-21T21:18:11+00:00

My issue with this post and the post cited is that over simplify this stuff...

BlessdRTheFreaks · 2025-07-18T06:30:44+00:00

I think it's actually from the carnal height of descrating innocence.

TheBrizey2 · 2025-07-18T06:44:33+00:00

No you’re wright, every man secretly wants to be as secure as Little Bill from Boogie Nights.

gslzhytvrq · 2025-07-18T06:37:46+00:00

Men and women are different. This is the justification that many women use for their hypocritical standards like expecting men to put in 1000x more effort in courting them or desiring assertive strong men while being a passive wallflower herself. Anyone that even hints to men being misogynistic for preferring low n count women just needs to cope that men and women are different.

TubularBrainRevolt · 2025-07-18T10:14:49+00:00

Men want virgins because they think that they are going to be more faithful. Faithfulness means higher likelihood that no bastard children will be produced. Still, this is not a surefire method for the man. Infidelity exists and existed forever. It is an evolutionary logic very simple to understand. Still culture plays an important role. For example I have been exposed to virginity content much more through Reddit posts from the US rather than living in my country in Europe. Let me disagree about the animal kingdom, because mating strategies vary a lot. Usually polygynous species with particularly large or dominant males look for inexperienced females that they can protect. There are species where the females hold much more power. Also stop visiting 2x chromosomes, it is an extremely toxic community.

Xeltar · 2025-07-18T12:12:54+00:00

This reminds me of that one Indian guy who posted this exact same thing.

It's insecurity, and makes no sense since men are more likely to be unfaithful in relationships according to GSS. If she's with you and not her ex, that means she chose you over all her other options.

Clutterboxx · 2025-07-18T12:19:36+00:00

That post reads like it was written by a child

GKilat · 2025-07-18T15:55:09+00:00

Two reasons, being the special first and the desire for that tightness of a virgin. That's the real reason behind the desire for virgins. It stems from our childish nature of wanting to be special by being the first and from the assumption that experienced women are loose and unsatisfying. Everything else is an attempt to make it reasonable. I went through this phase and found it only messed with my head and dropped it after making me suffer for so long worrying about it.

If you think about it, you aren't confident if you constantly worry about the woman comparing you to her past partners and you failing at it. Rather, why not take it positively and her seeing how much her past relationship sucks compared to now with you? If her past relationship is so good then she wouldn't have break off with them. Use that reasoning in saying you can be better than them.

Patient_Recording_96 · 2025-07-18T08:16:36+00:00

And women desire manwhores... so... what shall we do?

Title	Men simply want virgin women because of security and feeling of being special.
Author	Master-Praline3326
Upvotes	29
Comments	360
Date	July 18, 2025 6:28 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1m2uz3c/men_simply_want_virgin_women_because_of_security/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/men-simply-want-virgin-women-because-of-security.1557456 https://theredarchive.com/post/1557456

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