Porn ruins men

blackmetalbetty · 2022-01-25T19:15:15+00:00

Learn to make her orgasm and the switch would flip on. No one wants to bang someone who can't get them off for all the mental preoccupation with sex they tote. I'd be angry if I entered a relationship with a dude that thought sex would be like "in the porno/movies" even when I'm in my own dark place mentally. I mean comparing inaccessibility to sex to being a malnourished prisoner?? Lmao

When you can't make someone orgasm, they start to associate you with that inability even before y'all sit down at bed's edge. If I saw someone (a partner, coworker, acquaintance, service worker at a eatery I frequent) who CONSTANTLY let me down and drained my energy with their incompetence, I'd dread encountering or interacting with them. That's something alot of men don't understand. If I associate you with one sided/no happy ending sex, why would I be a "return customer" (unless I'm self harming). If I associate you with always fucking wanting something from me (but never giving/completing my gratification) I'd avoid you and recede more into myself like this woman. He's talking about the life he trapped himself in, but she is trapped as well. No orgasms (I doubt he tried everything, short of vigoruously record scratching her clit with ungroomed nails or that other stupid shit they do), a baby that requires an exigent amount of care, and a relationship that's about to devolve into unconscionable affair over something as habitual and nonurgent as sex.

BedazzledSwashbuckle · 2022-01-25T20:20:14+00:00

I never pass up a chance to post this wonderful, truthful, so very accurate article for any lurkers who may be thinking it's a moral argument that's causing us to be so harsh:

https://emmalindsay.medium.com/porn-makes-men-terrible-in-bed-6e4df5f73200

edwardianemerald · 2022-01-25T17:04:28+00:00

REMINDER that this mess of a man did not marry his kinky exes (if it was so important to him, why didn't he marry them?) and now he is comparing his wife to kinky exes that he is no longer with.

ASeaOfQuotes · 2022-01-25T16:04:27+00:00

There’s too much to unpack here, but this is a perfect example of two very unhappy people continuing to try to “work it out” and then shooting themselves in the foot by having a child together. No matter what happens now, someone suffers. The parents, the child, separately or together, doesn’t matter. Someone will continue to suffer for the rest of their 3 lives and it’s simply a choice of who.

Geocities_SEO_Expert · 2022-01-25T17:35:07+00:00

Page 4 has one of my pet peeves, the men who feel wronged because they had to go from school to work, because their parents wouldn't/couldn't sponsor any party years. Work, work, work, WAAAAAH! Welcome to life, buddy.

He's 29, the baby has been in existence for less than two of those. If he had a regular college education, he had years 22-27 to go to work, come home, then go out to party. He had roughly half a decade to cruise for ass at bars. These men never grow up, and their childishness usually comes at no small cost to a woman who started growing up before age 12.

thinktwiceorelse · 2022-01-25T16:46:13+00:00

Every single one of his exes orgasmed, except this one. Yeah, right.

Fuckdoesithurt956 · 2022-01-25T18:08:00+00:00

This feels like one of those missing missing reasons posts, where the wife would tell a whole other story.

But what we can tell is that he's obsessed with doing degrading sex acts, harasses his wife until she "gives in", sees no reason to be involved as a parent if someone else is there to do it, doesn't do romantic guestures or gifts to make her feel appreciated or loved, only compliments her when he wants something aka sex (and she knows it), has lost all motivation in life because she "puts off" anal, and would have already cheated on her if he could.

Edit: found the original thread. OP'r dirty deleted his comments, but the replies show that he is a porn addict (a few times daily, contrary to his OP), doesn't do any domestic work because he doesn't see it/know how, and also his wife can get off with a vibrator but he doesn't like to use it on her because it's too hard to hold and he feels inferior. Oh and he's only been in therapy a month.

MsWriteNow07 · 2022-01-25T18:43:52+00:00

This SOB wrote FIVE pages about why his wife is a frigid shrew because she won’t have anal or give him blowjobs while he’s DRIVING. Yet his wife is begging him to spend time with their only child and he won’t because: 1. He’s too busy with work, Reddit and drinking and 2. His MIL is living there, so she can do it instead. No wonder this idiot’s marriage is failing: him. No time for his child or quality time with his wife. Nothing about complimenting her after the baby or trying to create any non-physical intimacy. But pages about his dick

ohnomaxwellslaws · 2022-01-25T16:55:52+00:00

I'd probably find someone who'd like to fuck me if I went to a bar on a friday.

And other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself.

lansburysoda · 2022-01-25T15:55:45+00:00

She recently gave birth, he’s never given her an orgasm, but she won’t give him road head or anal 😕 and anal is his KINK 😢 time for divorce?

millennialpink2000 · 2022-01-25T16:21:14+00:00

He doomed his own future. Rather than marrying any of his exes who gave him sooooooo much anal, he married the madonna trying to change her. It didn't work, and now he's crying and blaming her. Suck it up buttercup, you chose this. You don't end up married with a kid by accident

aquietsword · 2022-01-25T20:47:16+00:00

Grown ass men still want surprise blow jobs in their car? There's so much more wrong with this guy but that part was extra special.

Platipus6 · 2022-01-25T22:18:29+00:00

Man writes a 3 page diatribe about how he's depressed, demotivated, unenthusiastic, floppy, useless, pushy, entitled, whiny, has no desire to act like a normal adult, partner and father, and can't cope.

Completely unironically, whines about his wife being unenthusiastic.

These asshats truly believe that with the power of our pussy, they'll magically spring into action and be the most involved, energetic, amazing, loving, respectful, connected husband and father ever, if they just got to stick it in our bumhole.

purasangria · 2022-01-25T20:52:41+00:00

Men are so lost without sex, it's pathetic. Remember this whenever men have the audacity to ask you what you bring to the table.

Poorfck · 2022-01-25T16:08:42+00:00

He wants to climb on a motorcycle and crash into a wall because.... his wife won’t try anal? Okay.

TERFSareawesome · 2022-01-25T16:24:40+00:00

I love when men say stuff like "She's been WITHHOLDING anal from me since we met". Those little sentences reveal so much. As if anal sex is something he's just innately OWED from his partner for existing and her not giving him sexual access to her ass is some kind of crime. Like she's a thief who stole something from him and won't give it back or a boss who refuses to hand over the final paycheck. It's all so antagonistic, hateful, and entitled.

Mcccy · 2022-01-25T16:23:59+00:00

Are they THAT Clueless??

A) Her mom opened her eyes about how little he contributes with house/baby work.

B) He talked about his ex and how he'd tOtaLlY get f#cKed if he wanTed toNighT. She can tell he is thinking like this.

C) The baby is 9months old, you aren't ALLOWED to have sex after birth for at least 2 months. Also she's probably wrecked from breast-feeding or from waking up every 2 hours to look after the baby.

D) "I'm AlwYS diplomatic and Ask her How ShE iS" So like, tbe absolute bare minimum???

TERFSareawesome · 2022-01-25T16:23:08+00:00

I really never trust men who say things like "I'm neither fat nor skinny". Translation: I have the body of Seth Rogen with a huge gut and love handles, but women want to have sex with him in Hollywood movies, so what's the problem?

alpinepunch2021 · 2022-01-25T17:03:14+00:00

God I hope his wife finds FDS somehow and never gets coerced into doing any of this shit. The constant comparing to his exes (why are they exes? Either they dumped him, likely because of how fucking demanding and petulant he is, or he dumped them for reasons that mysteriously never into his comparisons with the mother of his child) somehow offends me more than his desperate need to recreate porn IRL. Like, he legitimately thinks that just because he married this person he's somehow entitled to all this inane shit from her - like he's so utterly clueless about just how single and alone and *gasp* sexless he'd be without her. I guarantee you the reason she's so uninterested in having sex with him (aside from the obvious one of having birthed a child recently) is because she can sense his off-putting desperation and entitlement.

Edit: Also, I just noticed the 'I'm not the guy who just throws money at my wife, expecting to buy her loyalty, and she's not the type of person to expect to be treated like a princess' thing. Being anti 50/50 or anti cheap wedding rings was one of the FDS tenets I had the hardest time wrapping my head around, but setting aside concerns of how things aren't 50/50 since women have to give birth and face far more medical complications from having sex than men, the thing that really convinced me that 50/50 was bullshit was that the kind of man who adamantly argues for it tends to also be the kind of guy who acts like this woman's husband. It's a heuristic for general assholery, selfishness, entitlement, and just downright poor theory of mind in men.

scorchedsouI · 2022-01-25T16:04:50+00:00

"I'm not the guy to take a woman's panties off and jam it in!"

Translation: I'm not your usual rapist, I'm a coercive rapist. Now give me pussy.

The_Cat_Empress · 2022-01-25T22:16:38+00:00

I skimmed this after the “aNaL iS mY KiNk” crap reared itself in his whiny diatribe.

I’m sure she can sense he’s cheating on her in his mind with his pst exes and feels it in the way he looks at her. She is probably feeling like crap and demoralized because her scrote of a husband doesn’t do anything intimate besides asking for sex.

And with stories like these you don’t get the whole picture. How often does he ask for degrading sex? Does he even contribute to the house or chores??

These men feel entitled to so much even when their wives just popped a kid out. I feel SO BAD for her!!!!

inlovewithaloser · 2022-01-25T18:57:49+00:00

It’s always “Me, Me, Me” with these LV guys.... they can’t possibly fathom that their wife/girlfriend also has sexual desires/libido and that she may be suffering or struggling as well.

TERFSareawesome · 2022-01-25T16:06:20+00:00

God he’s so porn sick with his “surprise bjs and anal kink”. Your wife is not a sex object to play out your fantasies from porn!

MyLifeIsWandsXIII · 2022-01-25T21:34:03+00:00

For some reason I get the feeling that he's failing to mention certain things and leaving a lot out. I'd love to hear the wife's side of the story.

KindredMaximus · 2022-01-25T21:44:04+00:00

He's so disconnected from ''the baby'' - he'd be a lot happier if he could see value here and bond and play with his child. There is nothing in this world like the love and smiles from your own baby and he's missing out. In the future - like so many men before him - he'll blame his wife on why his child takes no notice of him. My ex had the temerity to ignore our children and then blame me for ''keeping them away from him'' - he didn't even speak to them when they asked him a question when they were little - why would they bother when they were teenagers? I would warn him that he was missing out and seeing children as a burden and not a privilege promotes this bad attitude that men have once they start having a family. And lack of sex is like getting water every 3 days - how DrAmAtIC - and they call us drama queens. Pathetic.

Hhjjuuy · 2022-01-25T16:04:51+00:00

I really don't understand thus need for ongoing "experimenting" with sex. I thought it was a cringy term when I was a teenager but it at least made some sense at the time. But what unholy "experiments" are you doing when you've been together long enough and fully enough to be married with a child?!

ETA And oh nice he's literally just raping her. She says no and he pesters her until she gives in.

Why didn't he marry the women who loved anal and endangering the lives of those around them?

keep_my_stuff · 2022-01-25T18:49:07+00:00

The comment about her postponing doing a painful and humiliating sex act makes me feel so sad at the state of everything. The state of men who feel bad about themselves because they don't get everything their pornsick self desires. The willfull misunderstanding of "postponement" and the nagging about sex.

The state of women who keep the door open instead of saying eww no, because they are afraid if they say "actually I don't want to do 4n4l ever“ he will leave. How sad.

Buggy1218 · 2022-01-25T16:31:19+00:00

No wonder the wife isn’t attracted to him. He “isn’t in the habit” of caring for his own child so he shoves it off on the MIL, and then resents her presence.

She’s the live in nanny and wife’s mother, have some respect dude.

xfelugirlx · 2022-01-25T21:22:02+00:00

Wtf with all that porn fantasies, divorce him asap

cryptohobo · 2022-01-26T00:56:03+00:00

I like how he says he can’t cheat because he’s married with a kid. Buddy, that isn’t why and you know it.

miwamus · 2022-01-25T17:37:54+00:00

He started out sounding reasonable and then proceeded to describe a man so unattractive to women that my pussy dried up to the level of my mouth.

AP__ · 2022-01-25T19:08:37+00:00

“I spent my 20s taking care of my parents”

You literally said in the past that you sold your car for an automatic to get road head dude…

DivineGoddess1111111 · 2022-01-26T02:50:07+00:00

That's a lot of words for "I'm looking for an excuse to have an affair."

PollyannaPenny · 2022-01-26T03:28:30+00:00

As the mother of a one year old, this post hurt me. I hope this woman runs away with her mother & her baby and doesn't look back.

The postpartum period is rough (ESPECIALLY if she had a complicated delivery). If this scrote wants her to put out, the best strategy is to do things like cleaning the house without being asked, make sure the baby has clean/sanitary bottles, take the baby for a few hours so she can sleep for a long stretch, etc. Listening to him whine for sex just makes her feel like she has another, less cute baby to take care of. Its NOT sexy!

I feel bad for their baby. Even if the parents divorce, s/he has to live with that dynamic for the rest of the parents' lives

daisy_0720 · 2022-01-25T19:15:31+00:00

Is he actually whining about having to be an adult and the fact he can't anally rape his wife in a moving vehicle?

These men are literally brain-damaged, I swear.

starlight_sequence · 2022-01-25T16:22:52+00:00

This made me physically ill to read.

CheetahEnergy · 2022-01-26T04:26:37+00:00

One of the saddest parts of all this (so many to choose from) was when he learned to drive automatic for the sole purpose of getting blowjobs while driving. This man is a pathetic excuse for life.

FI-REfox · 2022-01-25T16:54:14+00:00

Married 1 year with a 9-month old baby... I can't say for sure who "baby-trapped" whom into a shotgun wedding, but based on how incredibly unhappy his wife is, it seems pretty obvious. I don't know what sunshine he blew up her ass to convince her to keep this baby, but he's living the consequences now.

randomgirlimok · 2022-01-26T06:02:51+00:00

You can give a man everything- a loving wife, great family, support him, cook, clean etc until he is 85 on his death bed with dementia and the wife is changing his underwear for him. but it all comes down to “but I don’t get enough SEX” and he will throw it all away in the blink of an eye.

LindaBitz · 2022-01-25T17:30:45+00:00

I would really like to read the comments on the original post. Did a bunch of people agree with him?

dogfart4 · 2022-01-25T19:22:28+00:00

He switched his car to automatic for a blowjob….wtf?

FlockAroundtheClock · 2022-01-26T06:13:11+00:00

This was SO disgusting to read. Especially his complaints about “putting off anal” even though it’s his “kink” and he’s “done it with all his other partners.” Then later he claims he hasn’t dated much? Fuck this guy. Yeet him into the sun.

Salt_Satisfaction · 2022-01-26T10:29:14+00:00

He asked her WHAT? Giving a blowjob while the man is driving is so degrading. Ultimate LVM ego trip. I've always thought that was incredibly arrogant. And he asked her several times to do that??

There's more to unpack obviously but this detail was enough. I would break up if anyone asked me to do that.

Mysterious_Call_924 · 2022-01-25T19:47:20+00:00

Good god I couldn't even finish reading this

if there are just soooo many women willing to have kinky sex with him, why didn't he marry one of them, hm?

CheetahEnergy · 2022-01-26T04:29:09+00:00

Also thank god the wife’s mom is in the house to actually support the wife. Poor thing seemed pretty right high risk for post partum depression given her sad excuse for a partner

Typical_Candle_5627 · 2022-01-26T05:37:20+00:00

sickening. this for sure would have been both of my exes. this guy is absolute filth and does not deserve a child. his wife doesn’t want to give him blowjobs and do anal after childbirth?! i cannot

ShieldMaidenLagertha · 2022-01-26T04:03:55+00:00

Honestly? He’s never made her orgasm but they both thought it was good idea for the 2 of them to pledge an eternal commitment to each other? Wtf is wrong with people?

BornToBeWildType · 2022-01-26T09:43:03+00:00

Countdown to cheating in 3...2...1...

hexriot2001 · 2022-01-26T22:55:35+00:00

TLDR: me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me.

ShittyPianist · 2022-01-25T20:18:41+00:00

I'm on the fence about pinning this down to porn. There's a lot here. His wife might have postpartum or something, or have had the "husband stitch" or something that made sex painful and is too embarrassed to talk to her husband. Or maybe, the husband is not living up to his writing here and is making her feel like crap on the regular. Or ya know, just him not being a proper dad and chalking that up to "women's duties" is just killing her interest in him.

Like others have said, this definitely feels like a couple who had a hail mary baby to keep the relationship going.

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Title	Porn ruins men
Author	lansburysoda
Upvotes	529
Comments	162
Date	January 25, 2022 3:51 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/scgs4w/porn_ruins_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/porn-ruins-men.1097616 https://theredarchive.com/post/1097616

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