Most women fuck with men in an attempt to get commitment and get dumped either before even establishing a relationship or have STRs with them. That way they quickly rack up n counts close to or above 20.

Unless you are interviewing every woman you’ve observed, you have no idea what their sexual habits are either way.

I'm interacting with them enough to get a good idea. Either because im interested romantically in them or because they are in my extended social circle. That 20 year old chick in that class thatI know has been in an LTR for 3 years probably doesn't have that big of an n count. That chick we know has been single for years and is partying every weekend probably isn't a virgin 😂 . N count isn't that hard to determine once you know what to look for.

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from my perspective, the "younger generation" gets along in a more real way than ever before b/c people open up to each other about sexuality, mental struggles, substance abuse, and even loneliness in ways that may have seemed less socially acceptable before. women are not put on pedestals and seen as real human beings outside their pussies and men try to control their thirst out of respect, to the point where they're not approaching women in public very often unless at parties and etc. yeah, a lot of men and women hate each other too because of how honest everyone is and how playing games/manipulation/toxicity is literally just out in the open now, so along with being able to trust each other more in one sense, they are also less able to trust each other.

i'd also say that a lot of men and women still find it difficult to get along, but more because of 1) lack of trust aforementioned and 2) major social anxiety (understandable and i feel it).

i feel like there was always one sided attraction and "nice guy" vibes in friendships between men and women and that was just socially acceptable and not voiced aloud, but it's not acceptable nowadays and both men and women are just aware of that now so people are more aware of possibly orbiting (a lot of women don't like orbiters; a lot of men don't like to be orbiters).

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That thread with all the women claiming they prefer low n count men is kinda funny.

Yeah some might prefer one for marriage but I garantee most of them choose the high n count men for fun or when they want to explore their sexuality.

So you know that stereotype women complain about that "men are so sexist/hypocritical and want to fuck the sluts but marry a good girl" ?

It seems like some women have the same mentality. They like hooking up and exploring their sexuality with the high n count men but when it comes to someone they want to split the responsibilities of paying off a mortgage and raising kids they disparage the high n count men as gross/unfit/more likely to cheat ect and the low n count guy is suddenly "peak desirability"

Only difference between the women who want to fuck high n count/marry low n and the men who want to do the same is the women will on average be a lot more successful at it. It is at best a fantasy for most men, but for women it is easily made a reality if they actually want it.

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I always think it's funny how that characterize the high-n men. Ugly, gross, disgusting, manipulative, etc... They can't help it, they have to imagine some disgusting slob.

The thing is, I've known a few VERY high-n count men (mid to high triple digits), and none of them were remotely like that. One was a 'pretty boy', thick curly black hair, very good looking, with an absolutely MASSIVE cock. One was the spitting image of Leonardo Dicaprio (seriously could have been his long lost twin brother) but was a footballer player and on steroids. So Leo with muscles... you can imagine how much attention he got. He didn't even have any game, he just sat there and women would line up to throw themselves at him.

High-n men are high n for a reason. They are not schlubby, greasy, manipulative, etc... That's just hamstering.

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high-n men are attractive, and hence successful with women

yeah they tend to be good looking (but some don't even have to be according to this sub's male posters who say honestly that they are average-to-decent, not the top 20%, but can still rack up high numbers). and yeah, good looking men are successful with women, at least sexually.

but the post asked for opinions on LTRs/marriage.

The this is, women like high-n count men

women with average to high n-counts who literally don't care about n-count and/or are very sex positive and/or participate in casual sex may like high n-count men. or just men that are attractive. (i think the ideal is a person who is attractive but has a low n-count voluntarily, for anyone).

it's like how men routinely force themselves not to care about a woman's past b/c she's attractive af, i see it all the time.

different types of women exist!!!

It's not a negative

assuming this is true, it's a negative to blow up someone's ego or get involved w/ men who will obviously hurt you which is why i try to look out for my friends 😁

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The pretty boy with the big dick was a friend I worked with, I was a bouncer and he was a DJ/MC. Basically just paid to flirt and draw more women in to the bar. he was generally a nice guy, but had a massive ego (understandably).

The Leo-clone with muscles was a bouncer with me at another club (I worked a number of different clubs over the 5y at uni... just trying to get as many hours as I could since uni was expensive). He was a genuinely nice guy, but he was a massive slut. Could not say 'no' to a pretty girl. We 'let him go' because we would constantly find his post empty and he'd be in the basement banging 2 or 3 chicks at a time when he should be working. Bar's are pretty lenient about that sort of shit, but you still have a job to do...

It was funny when he would come to the club even after he was fired, because he knew everyone and the place was busy. A few times his gf/'baby mama' (and in this case I use that phrase literally) would come running in and scream at him for cheating. Out of all my time working there were 3 woman who were legit 10/10s, and his GF was one of them. She'd run in no makeup, sweatpants and sweater with baby puke stains, and still turn more heads than all the dolled up chicks shaking their ass on the stage. And yet he cheated on her endlessly, and she always went back to him. He might as well have been the poster boy for RP/BlackP.

He wasn't a bad, or manipulative guy, not overly confident, decent in a fight but nothing special, not particularly interesting and no game, just very good looking and could not keep his dick in his pants.

Had a 3rd friend who was my manager but also what I would consider a good friend, and not just a friendly acquaintance. He has the highest n-count of anyone I know, or that I know of. We estimated that it was around 2000-3000 unique n's. That's not a joke, nor an exaggeration. The guy wasn't that attractive, maybe 6/10 or 7/10 at best, and in his mid 30s. But... he was truly gifted in a way I've never seen before. He had some sort of 2nd sense when it came to 'slut radar'. He could pin-point with amazing accuracy the girls that just wanted to fuck. Maybe they had gotten out of a bad relationship, or maybe they were feeling 'down', or maybe it was that time of the month and were feeling horny. To this day I don't know what subtle cues he was picking up on, but he was a savant when it came to knowing what women were down to fuck.

Groups of girls would be coming into the club and I'd say 'so which one's are going to go home with a guy' and he'd point out 1 or 2, seemingly at random. Sometimes the hot ones, sometimes the ugly one's. But every single time he was right.

I haven't seen him in a while, and for all I know he's died of STDs. I had to block his email because it was an endless barrage of pictures of him fucking chicks. He was a great guy, and we would have lots of interesting conversations about philosophy or just life in general; but he had a libido that was out of this world, and an ability that made that sort of lifestyle a reality.

[–]Bandit174🦝 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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If you don't mind me asking, what is your n count?

I don't want to go into specifics, but while I was significantly less than theirs, it was partially by choice. I wasn't too interested in ONS/STRs. I had no game, but I was 5'11 and anywhere from 220-230lbs of solid muscle, so it didn't really matter. I got hit on all the time, cold propositioned, etc...

If you're in the top 20% there's more than enough women to go around. You're just swimming in attention. I had more than enough girls, and some stupidly hot one's too, to assuage my ego.

Also in regard to the big dick guy, do you think guys with big dicks get around more in general?

Without a doubt. The girls definitely talked about it, and word gets around quick. At first I was like 'him!??' but once in a while if he got really drunk he'd whip it out and he had a pornstar sized dick. I didn't actually measure it, but it was substantial.

So it just makes me think those guys must get around more and end upcoverrepresented in womens sexual histories.

Without a doubt. Many girls are curious about it. I don't know if it lead to more LTRs or not (like it matter in the long run), I never really asked him. But it certainly led to many ONSs.

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Do ppl think that the idea of “being meant for each other” is misguided? I (male) was talking to my mom the other day about my requirements for a gf and I said she needed to have 6 figure job, enjoys her work, and is a 5-7 face-wise. I feel that her having a 6 figure job and enjoying it probably speaks a lot to her personality already.

While this criteria isn’t common, it’s also not super rare. So it made me think that women and men are not rly that special. The difference in enjoyment between one partner vs another may not be that large. And the likeliness she divorces is also not going to change that much.

Also think about the probability of finding "the one" within a couple dozen dates. Considering all the possible options out there, it seems fishy that you can find "the one" that easily. If there really was someone special for you, it would take hundreds or thousands of dates to find "the one".

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They have simple things and just save/invest all their money so they can retire earlier, or have a good fund for their kids etc.

These are materialistic ambitions focusing on material comfort.

To be honest the stay at home moms tend to care more about brands and "nice things" because they spend more time looking to stuff, and the latest iphone / car tend to excite them more than the 6 figure earners. Most of the excitement of materialistic stuff comes from your ability to show off that you can afford it,

Materialism has a broader meaning than that which it seems to connote to you.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Materialism

Most people I know making 6 figures aren't even materialistic.

I have earned six figures or more per year in every job I have held since my first full year in my first job out of college, my wife did in her second full year in her first job out of college. We graduated from college almost thirty years ago. Every professional in my field earned at least mid six figures a year, more than half earned seven, some eight, and a few nine. Until recently, everyone in my immediate social circle did so, including all of my friends from high school and college. In the neighborhoods and towns in which I lived as an adult until fairly recently, the average household incomes were mid six figures. I’m pretty familiar with the culture of people who are 65th percentile earners and above in the US.

In the last few years I have moved to a place in which most people are not six figure wage earners, my immediate social circle has changed dramatically, and the bulk of the people in it are not in the 65th percentile or above of earners in the US. I started noticing the cultural differences earlier though as my wife began a business (in a different field than her former profession) and her clientele were also mostly not six figure wage earners.

It has been my experience that on the whole, the culture of those in the US earning less than six figures is substantially less materialistic than the culture of those earning six figures and more. Perhaps this is because there is also a significant urban/rural divide which features in my experience of both cultures. But were I choosing a potential wife today, I would absolutely and unequivocally choose a rural (say Montana) farm girl, from a conservative family, who worked hard on the small family farm and had no ambitions towards a six figure career as such women tend to be substantially less materialistic (in both the specific definition above and in the connotative sense you ascribe) than women with ambitions to earn six figures annually.

[–]chalkandapples1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Maybe I'm not too familiar with what you consider materialism to be. Do you consider a non-material life just living off the land or something? If you live in a city, where you need to buy things to keep a comfortable life, can you do so non-materialistically?

Like you said, maybe you just prefer a rural life rather than an urban one? That sounds fun too, and maybe I'll try it one of these days. But making enough money to easily change lifestyles is nice too.

I make the in middle of 6 figures and my husband makes 7 figures at the moment. We've always been city people and I feel like we live a pretty low key life. All money does is give us freedom. If investing and saving up money for comfort and early retirement is materialistic, then I don't think it's even that bad. What is your description of a non-materialistic vs a materialistic person?

Given you graduated 30 years ago, you've lived a lot more life than we did so I'll respect your wisdom. I can check out a rural area and it will probably be fun, but I can feel it in my blood that I'm a city person.

You must be retired already right? Maybe I'll mellow out as I get older too and retire. But right now I'm full of energy and just want to charge forward and see what I can accomplish you know.

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Well, I mean, when I choose to commit to a person they become special to me by virtue of filling that spot in my life. My husband is special to me because I love him and have built my whole life around him and we have a shared history, home and family together. I cherish those things so they, and he, are special to me. But if I had never met him I would have probably met someone else I could have been just as happy with. He's not special to me because he was some preordained "one" I was "meant to be" with, he's special to me because of what we share and what he's come to mean in my life.

It's like, I love my cat because she is my cat. I could have taken any cat home from the shelter and would probably have loved any of them just as much. But I didn't, I took this one home, so this is the one I have that bond with.

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They are the ones you meet at convenience stores, and probably do not receive many, if any welfare. Welfare is mostly for those without anything. As other people put it, many are also living with their main families, as they alone cannot afford a very wealthy life by themselves alone.

My uncle and aunt are immigrants in the US right now, both are high-school graduates, and pretty bad ones at that. Uncle is a car's salesman working 8hrs a day and aunty is a house cleaner working around 4 hrs a day. They together earn enough to be within the best well off family unit on this family.

They have a car, are paying for a comfortable house and never once they had to ration food. heck, they are down right fat and sick right now for eating so much bought/canned goods.

Many westerners think that life as a poor person in the west is hard. But from my perspective, even some minimun wage workers there have an easier life than rich folk I know here. Just the concept of being able to afford living alone or just with one single generation, to me, is a miracle.

Thus, in my opinion, If you are not in some big city center, like NYC or the silicon valley, you can live quite the worry free life with your earnings as a high-school graduate in the west.

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this isn't for me to answer (so ignore this if you want 😅), but from the reverse perspective, that is a plus for me 😇

Anime is just so mainstream these days. I really don't think anyone would care.

i agree w/ this, i think (close-minded imo) people who aren't open to any media from non-Western countries may have a problem, but i think that's also hopefully a minority of people.

there's also stereotypes about people who like anime or other maybe nerdier or niche media, but there's tons of popular hot influencers and just generally hot and/or socially well-adjusted people irl who like anime so that kind of changes things (and there always have been, most people just hid it before. even now i wouldn't go around blasting it, but it shouldn't be something to think less of someone about).

edit: also it's really the people who get overly obsessed about anime women/men to the point of not being able to discern the difference between reality/fantasy that give anime fans a bad reputation. if she wasn't able to "tell" that he was an anime fan, he's probably in the clear lmao.

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[–]Throughawayman80808Love is a labour 🤗😒 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Ugly girls are dangerous because they're always settling, not necessarily settling for less than they can reasonably get, but less than what they want. And when a better opportunity comes by they have absolutely not incentive to jump ship. Especially considering a lot of less attractive women crave male attention, but what people don't understand is that they do not want to be seen as attractive by A man, they want to be seen as attractive by MEN, widely.

Basically the threshold of attractive enough to get them turned on is always going to be less attractive than the men they're capable of getting to commit to them. This is why a lot of less attractive women just drop out of dating completely and focus on hobbies.

Where as a attractive or above average girl whos dating below her league (and the guy isn't wealthy) has to have something about that man that she sees in him that she likes, because she has no reason to settle outside of the fact that she sees something special in that guy. There's genuinely more security in that relationship because there's greater certainty that they're not settling.

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interesting to see how people maintain their relationships and how their dynamics evolve over time

At its core, it's really very simple. The woman needs to feel that the guy remains her best option. This can happen three ways:

She loses her looks at least as fast as he loses his. She feels she can't do better. Unfortunately, online dating has given even homely middle-aged women almost unlimited options so this doesn't really work anymore.
His career/business takes off and the family prospers. She feels she can't do better. Unfortunately, in today's you go girl, you deserve it all world female expectations have increased exponentially. Eventually, the guy will fail to meet her ever-increasing expectations.
The guy stays/becomes more attractive than the woman (i.e. doesn't get fat and stays in shape). This is different than #1 because in that scenario both parties lose attractiveness and today's post-wall woman feels she can do better. In this scenario, even in today's sexual marketplace, she feels she cannot do better so she stays.

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just looked at the stats and it seems for both genders the use is highest from 45-64, and past that age, it goes back down a bit to similar percentages to 20-44 y/o. i dont think it has anything at all to do with this tbh, depression is usually such a looming figure that it distracts me from even thinking of relationships at all. i promise you plenty of married mothers feel just as depressed as childless women and single mothers (and apparently live shorter lives), but i think at that point they feel like their sadness is unfounded which is sad.

not surprised that under 20 the usage is less b/c people are hesitant to be on meds while growing (a good number of people i knew went to therapy though)...

but it def feels like college aged women AND men currently are heavy on the meds. i actually just got prescribed them but im a little scared to start, though i really don't see any other way 😹my psychiatrist also said she's been seeing a lot of other college students. so yeah, plenty of young healthy women are on antidepressants

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No lmao, they literally just don't want a relationship. I feel the same way, if only i weren't holding onto religion, but i am and that's the main reason why i'm not having casual sex 😅 i believe in dire consequences for myself b/c of it. but i can't just not have sex forever, so a relationship is the best i can do and the emotional bond is just a plus. i don't want kids either so eh.

basically, casual sex > relationships, but that's different for some girls based on personal morals.

the girls who i know who are having pretty casual sex or at the very least extremely quick series of relationships or FWBs (of all ages) are very attractive, can get the man they want but instead either play him or just let it be known they mainly want sex, and are having fun.

relationships are so stressful, i totally understand them!! the cheating, the manipulation, the headache of having to talk to someone everyday or even live with them. sadly that's all i've been raised to do, i believe in a higher power, and i don't want to disappoint my parents.

btw, i'm not implying all young women are riding the CC or whoring themselves out or anything. there's a variety of young women out there, i'm just saying that there is a brand of millennial and gen z women that is able to "plate" men very masterfully and who actually find thrill in manipulation and i'm just impressed, it comes naturally.

[–]TheJim661 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]athrowaway2832221 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

And yet the hotter the woman, the fewer partners she has. .I wonder why that is.

I've seen this (there was a post here about it actually), but I genuinely believe this has changed over time (before attractive women just got their high value man and just stuck with him but that's not the case anymore) b/c some of the most attractive men and women I know are having a variety of sex. It's pretty much expected that the average attractive young woman today has bodies on bodies b/c relationships aren't stressed anymore. Though, the only women who don't again have personal morals that stop her or got lucky with one their first relationships with a man who treats them right.

Sometimes it's because the attractive woman was cheated on or etc. and that sends her into a toxic spiral realizing that anyone can be done dirty (literally it doesn't matter how attractive a person is, they can be done dirty) so what's the point of a relationship, and so she just plays the game herself since romance is dead and sex really isn't and has fun while at it. A larger number of millennials and gen z women are also 1) LGBTQ+ and/or 2) childfree so that probably affects things too, so many pretty girls are bi ❤

[–]TheJim661 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]athrowaway2832221 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

The female imperative is serial monogamy, not polyandry.

Casual sex is technically serial monogamy anyway. It's having sex with one person... just different partners, one after the other in a period of time.

It doesn't matter what the female/male imperative is when this is just the facts of the social scene nowadays.

Plenty of genuinely attractive, sexually successful young men whining about women doing them wrong/cheating/being sluts and wanting a relationship. That's literally where the term "she's for the streets" comes from. Plenty of genuinely attractive, sexually successful young women swearing off relationships and uncaring of men talking shit (because they might talk shit but they still worship her). Plenty of women not putting value on sex but putting value on money, and therefore selling looks in whatever way possible to get through school and then finding a real career. That's the reality, you can't tell me this isn't what you're seeing either and that it's not different from even a decade ago.

Sure but the more attractive they are, the less likely it is to happen.

Wrong, it seems like the prettiest girls are being cheated on by men that look like thumbs. Crazy! If Beyoncé can get cheated on ................

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Come on, you’re in the business of stories

“I travel internationally, covering [whatever your beat is, you’re smartly vague about it on here. Business? “Covering multi-national corporations and holding them accountable to the public.” Lifestyle? “Covering the subtleties and unique aspects of individual cultures around the globe.” Finance? “Covering the inner workings of some of the world’s most powerful entities and people.” Etc, etc)

Well what do you make?

sly smile

“I do well for myself. That said, I’m constantly jetting off to new places, so I don’t like to be tied down with lots of “things” I’d otherwise have to put in storage”

Give me 15 minutes with your story, and I’ll have these chicks convinced you’re journalism’s James Bond without ever telling them your cash situation

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the military really made me never want to eat them again after giving us cheap boxed lunches with hardboiled eggs in them

Lol I can see this. I have a bunch of friends who have maaad chickens so I almosy always eat fresh eggs that they give me. I've also got scrambled, sunnyside, omelettes, and nest eggs down to a god damn science.

Eggs are one of the most common allergenic foods in the US. My lungs felt like they were on fire if I ever did any physical activity and as soon as I stopped eating them, that feeling disappeared

I can see this for sure. I think I used to be slightly allergic to them, but it's gone now after I've been eating them alot more for a while. I used to get a distinct tingly feeling in my throat when I would eat them.

They're a pretty great food if youre measuring protein/dollar though, only thing better is basically chicken, so I eat them all the time these days.

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Possibly, I think it's the kind of thing that works better for some people than others. I'm quite wee so I can't realistically eat a lot of food - I could easily and happily eat all my days calories in one sitting but then I'd be starving a few hours later. Maybe if I did it gradually it would work better but my current routine works for me as it keeps me feeling satisfied through the day.

A lot of people overeat and don't even realize it. The US really has an unhealthy attitude toward food, and they encourage it because it's a very profitable industry $$$.

Oh definitely, it's a problem here too. Partly I think it's just become so common and accepted to eat out/get takeaway that no one really thinks about what's going in to their food and all the extra fat and sugar it takes to make it taste like that. Even if it's not fast food but a nice restaurant; those fondant potatoes have been cooked with a whole pat of butter and there's probably more butter to thicken your sauce etc.

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There's some evidence that going too long without eating spikes gherlin, which causes many people to overeat when going out of the fasting state

That might only be true for people who are new to fasting. Grehlin spikes at usual meal times and only for about two hours. If you ignore it, it goes away, and you can reduce both the intensity and frequency by - doing intermittent fasting.

There's also some evidence that anti-catabolism is reduced as you're not eating your protein intake spread out throughout the day.

The body actually spares muscle with prolonged fasting as long as it's not longer than two or three days. This, again, might only be true for people who are new to fasting. The body adjusts after becoming used to the change in eating frequency.

I don't think this is that important for the average person trying to lose weight (could be for someone who's been seriously training for years though).

Yeah, I'm not sure how it would affect everyone who is training but there are some people who report better results with fasting and training. It's even advised for people to train on an empty stomach as it increases fat loss.

[–]Banned_BY_SOYMEN2 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

The body actually spares muscle with prolonged fasting as long as it's not longer than two or three days. This, again, might only be true for people who are new to fasting. The body adjusts after becoming used to the change in eating frequency.

This is simply not true. Part of the reason why it's counterproductive is due to the fact that those amino acids in your muscles are not being replaced in your body. Which brings me to something else I forgot, it's very hard for most people to down 150-180 g of protein between 1 or 2 meals.

Yeah, I'm not sure how it would affect everyone who is training but there are some people who report better results with fasting and training. It's even advised for people to train on an empty stomach as it increases fat loss.

Fat loss is simply requires a caloric deficit. I don't think anyone would suggest someone train on a completely empty stomach, as they would likely lack the intensity to be able to train at an effective level.

In regards to fasted cardio, which you're likely referring to:

A meta review of five independent studies on fasted vs. fed cardio concluded that there is no difference in fat or weight loss between them, but that there also likely no detrimental effects to fasted cardio.

[–]TheBookOfSeil1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Which brings me to something else I forgot, it's very hard for most people to down 150-180 g of protein between 1 or 2 meals.

You really don't need this much protein unless you're doing something like bodybuilding, and your body will usually let you know if you need more than you're getting, in which case, you just eat more.

Fat loss is simply requires a caloric deficit. I don't think anyone would suggest someone train on a completely empty stomach, as they would likely lack the intensity to be able to train at an effective level.

I'm not talking about a completely fasted state where all of your muscle glycogen stores are depleted. You can work out in the morning after a good 14 to 18 hours of not eating and be fine.

This still might not apply as much to people whose bodies aren't used to exercising without food, but I've been living like this for almost a decade now and it's not difficult.

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COVID brought us some very good things

It brought many of us WFH positions, where we no longer had to scrape and crawl our way through a ruthless commute to make it to work everyday.

In addition to this, it digitalized the modern working world, and it's finally taught some of these numb-skulled, good for nothing boomer fucks that we can do our jobs as effectively at home.

This in turn gave us lower transportation costs, lower stress, and more time to catch up on sleep.

It gave time for people to learn how to cook and prepare home cooked meals.

It helped many of us save money and become more financially conscious.

It gave us time to reflect on our lives and how we should move further with it.

It helped us avoid toxic people we would have either had to see otherwise.

It gave some of us time to get jacked, start a new business, or learn a new skill.

We got to see the greatest forms of human hypocrisy, especially during the riots and protests this past summer.

Many people got to adopt suffering pets without a home.

And hey, it owned some of the boomers for us too!

AutoModerator · 2021-03-01T21:00:14+00:00

This weekly thread is designed to be a place for all the funny discussions on PPD. Feel free to post off-topic questions, information, points-of-view, etc......

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Do you want a joking answer? Because the caffeine in men’s tears kicks coffee’s ass

Or a serious one?

Because I believe in equal access to opportunities. I don’t have the right to walk into an operating room and perform surgery, but I should have the right to go through school and earn that right

Because as much as women have made strides - to the point that we have to worry that our daughters’ advancement isn’t coming at the expense of our sons’ wellbeing / success in certain areas - there is still some shit out there that just isn’t cool. And while I do believe that male and female natures are what they are, I do think that we can taper the worst of our behavior to each other:

My body has been groped and grabbed by men more times than anyone on here would believe - places you do expect it (the subway) and places you don’t (looking at you, CVS). I have enough life experience to know that some men believe they just reach out and touch regardless of what I want
I’ve been told by a male client at a trade show to go put on a lower cut blouse and a push up bra
Just tonight, one of my best friends called me upset that her husband’s good friend of 30+ years drunkenly sent some very sexually aggressive text messages to their 16 year old daughter, who he’s known since she was a literal baby
Because my weight has been brought up in performance reviews (edit - for those who haven’t seen my pictures, I’m slim. And in shape.)

If that shit happened at a club, then fine. Price of entrance to a meat market. But this shit happens every day to women, and we need to have more honest conversations about it

And for the record, I do think our culture can do better by men, too. While I did back Me Too, we did a shit job in handling it in two areas - Aziz Ansari (seriously, I can’t figure out why he was cancelled) and not taking seriously the sexual harassment of men and abuse of boys (Bryan Singer, for one, should have been raked across the coals. I’m convinced he only ducked being the gay Harvey Weinstein because it was too inconvenient to really discuss gay culture in terms of the young and horny “anything goes” scene)

Anyhow, that’s my simultaneous rant about why I’m a feminist, and why being a feminist doesn’t mean I’m blind to the fact that men have their own special disadvantages

[–]Kaisha0012 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Because I believe in equal access to opportunities. I don’t have the right to walk into an operating room and perform surgery, but I should have the right to go through school and earn that right

Sorry but that's not feminism. Feminist believe in Equity and equal outcomes, not equal opportunities. The latter is called egalitarianism.

My body has been groped and grabbed by men more times than anyone on here would believe - places you do expect it (the subway) and places you don’t (looking at you, CVS). I have enough life experience to know that some men believe they just reach out and touch regardless of what I want

This is not exclusive to women. I guarantee I've been 'handled' more times than any non-stripper/sex worker on here. The difference is that most women don't find most men attractive, hence they don't want to grope most men. But put a top tier man and give them a few drinks and well... no demographic is handsier than cougars.

In fact most of what you say, while shitty and shouldn't happen, really has little to do with feminism.

[–]angels-fan1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]SmurfESmurferson9 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Because the feminists I know, the ones who taught at my university, weren’t Tumblr anger phase feminists. They are all perfectly rational folks who believe in equality of opportunity (primarily) and stuff like making sure that men don’t grope random women

I mean, hell, even NOW - probably the closest we have to an “official” feminist organization - officially supports including women in the draft

People who live in conservative areas think feminists are screeching blue haired harpies who want to kill all men. Or radical feminists who want to do the same (sometimes literally). And yeah, those people exist. But they’re the fringe elements, like the morons who invaded the Capitol on Jan 6th are the fringe GOP element

Living where I do now, the caricature of feminism I see from people I know in rural areas looks exactly like the caricature of political conservatism I see from people around here (a very blue area)

EDIT - feminism is problematic as hell in a lot of ways. It’s definitely a spoiled white woman’s movement at this point. But it can be both problematic and actually have some strong points

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While I did back Me Too, we did a shit job in handling it in two areas - Aziz Ansari (seriously, I can’t figure out why he was cancelled) and not taking seriously the sexual harassment of men and abuse of boys (Bryan Singer, for one, should have been raked across the coals. I’m convinced he only ducked being the gay Harvey Weinstein because it was too inconvenient to really discuss gay culture in terms of the young and horny “anything goes” scene)

not just two areas. feminists also conveniently ignored asia argento being outed as a predator by jimmy bennett, the guy who literally played her son in a movie like a decade earlier. i remember the photos of them in bed together. he is half her age and was 17 at the time, she was 37. then she paid him off so he’d stop talking about it publicly.

i didn’t see the feminists who were backing the movement talk about this story much or cancel her the way they did harvey weinstein and bill cosby. seems like they had a sort of allegiance to asia since she was backing the movement so hard.

i can only imagine how many more stories like this are out there and we just don’t know because the men didn’t come forward or were quietly paid off.

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Moving this comment from this OP here for more convo.

That tweet has garnered a lot of interesting takes.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You bring up an interesting thought exercise.

A lot of women seem to feel this way, so you're not alone there:

especially since I doubt I'd have a high enough drive to satisfy even low libido men (after a honeymoon period).

I wish cxj were still here because he and I hypothesized the ultimate end game was going to be many women quietly GTOW and co-parenting their respective kids as a joint unit (a throwback to pre-nuclear family).

He admitted most men and women also have very different cohabitation styles, "men belong outside," which makes it difficult for many hetero couples to get along swimmingly co-habitating and/or raising a family together.

Your OP made me think of this tweet/Tik Tok.

The quote-replies to that tweet were interesting:

(The last one is the theme of this whole subreddit sometimes *laughs in smh**)*

[–]Kaisha0015 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]TheJim663 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]GridReXX5 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

I don't see though how the nuclear family prevents women from forming connections and companionship with eachother.

It's not just the connections and companionship.

Having your "older auntie" or "MIL" or "mom" or "sister" stay with her for the first year of motherhood is likely more helpful to women than her husband.

Multi-generational dynamics like that are fairly common within many cultures that aren't so "isolative."

It's even as simple, for example, as my mom choosing to move literally .2 miles from her parents' house. I always wondered how my mom and dad worked full time, were on PTA, coached our little leagues, held family game night, and still survived. It's because they heavily leaned on the support of family/friends. It's because my mom was not shy about taking mental health moments and hanging out "with the girls."

Or, for example, my friend who grew up in South Philly. Her cousins lived next door. Her dad's parents lived around the corner. There was always "help." Parents want to go on a date? Just drop the kids off at "so and so's" house no questions asked.

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[–]GridReXX2 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Yeah. Most women thoroughly enjoy the companionship, fellowship, and nurturing support of other women they value as loved ones. The Western nuclear family and supreme "individualism" "my immediate family and no one else!" isolate women who appreciate those things and it doesn't bode well for her mental health nor her male mate's tbh.

My former colleague moved from NYC to Seattle to start with a start-up we were both at. He and his wife are African (Nigerian). His wife had just had their first child. The PNW barely has any African Americans, let alone any Nigerians. And the passive nature of the culture here doesn't lend itself to neighborly vibes and easily generating a support system of friends, etc.

Long story short, she couldn't take it and moved back (with their baby) to North Jersey to be near her mom, sisters, cousins, and comforting network of female friends. He was able to get his job back at his prior company and moved back to be with his family several months later.

Her husband (whom she loves) did not have the capacity to provide her that communal comfort and household help she desired as a new mom.

[–]OXOzymandias3 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]Kaisha0015 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

But concepts like "mommunes", pragmatic lesbianism, non-romantic marriages is a bit of a different thing than support of an extended family and friendships.

Not really. Women function best in groups. Call it what you want, but for women to be happy they need to be part of a functional group, and feel accepted by it.

The nuclear family with the typical SAHM (ok not so typical now but still) isolates women, and they often suffer because of it.

Historically women lived in communes/groups/extended families/etc... it was very rare (and risky) for a woman to be alone and so they have adapted to seek out companionship at nearly any cost.

I think it's one of the underlying and driving forces of feminism, which is one of my biggest issues with feminism. It's a real issue that needs to be addressed, but women are too busy blaming 'men' than to actually sit back and realize the issue largely has nothing to do with men.

Even the links she linked are largely anti-male, because most women feel that somehow it is men not upholding their part of the relationship, when men aren't really equipped to handle the sort of emotional rollercoaster women unleash on other women on a daily basis.

[–]GridReXX3 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Even the links she linked are largely anti-male

Eh, nah. The quotes I listed aren't "anti-male."

The only one that even mentioned men and could be perceived as such is that last one about "cishet men" and a guy tweeted that.

This was also from a man:

"My former wife & I have talked about how we should have done this instead of trying to force ourselves to be the stereotypical spouses. We want different things romantically but we make good friends & co-parents."

Here's another quote from a man:

"no I'm like really jealous I had a guy friend I wanted to do this with but he's straight and let his guy friends talk him into thinking the idea was gay"

It is interesting you interpreted the other ones as "anti-male" though.

Not mentioning or centering men =! "anti male" or "misandry" or "hating men"

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[–]Kaisha0015 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

and this is what I'm asking. You can't just lump all that shit together like "This was always the case.". When did women ever live in women communes? Other than 1970s womyn's land nonsense?

Look at any indigenous group. Whether it be African's, or South American's, etc... The hunter/gatherer lifestyle had women at the center of the group, with men heading off to hunt/fight.

Even with most North American/European tribes. The women live together, either in the same housing complex, or separate sleeping 'huts' with a central fire pit or 'hall' where pretty much all domestic duties are shared.

A little further on in history and we still see extended families living under the same roof, forming the same basic female hierarchy/structure. While the elite's/aristocracy lived closer to modern people (ie. isolated family units) they weren't really isolated as they had servants/slaves to manage.

Modern nuclear families are a crude imitation of the ancient aristocratic lifestyle, with technology replacing servants/slaves. But it really doesn't translate well.

Take a look at these pictures of an uncontacted indigenous group. One or two large dormitory like structures that everyone lived in.

Extended family in particular is very different than that.

Not at all. Tribes/clans are just the next step after 'extended family' gets a bit too large.

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Also, I simply found that paleo tweet cool and wanted to share!

It is cool.

I hope this edit better explains the sentiment I meant to convey with the previous comment? What does it matter to a woman in a relationship what "other men" have done? She cares about the value-add of her mate, not "men." She's not fucking the world of men. She's fucking her man.

Because the government, with the expressed consent of women, has offloaded much of what a man brings to the table. Forcing them to provide it, but now get none of the 'reward' because it all goes through the government middle-man.

Women are still supported by men, you take them out of the equation, modern society and the cushy lifestyle is allows goes out the window. Sure women work, but the vast majority are directly or indirectly subsidized by men.

[–]GridReXX2 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

If you removed the government, most of the people "subsidized by the government" would resort to unregulated and unlawful means of income.

You'd have even more men resorting to drug/arms/whatever dealing and muggings, as well as the below.
And even more women resorting to sex work, as well as the above.

Most of the men and women in my network have careers or work multiple jobs or gig-work AKA they support themselves. It's all a grind.

You could make the case that men could opt out of doing things like "creating the internet and construction work" since women have opted out of sexing men as a reward for those things.

Maybe that'll happen. Atlas Shrugged or whatever.

Life is incentive-based.

And ultimately when one person's desires and boundaries run incongruent with the other person's desires and boundaries, conflict/discontent etc. arises.

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Western women will never band together and decide fucking men they don’t want to fuck is the best strategy forward.

I never even suggested that as a solution. Why do you leap to that?

And basically you're saying that society can burn as long as you get to fuck chad. How is that any less ridiculous than your scenario?

Or unless civilization reverts to something less comfortable (insert war torn community full of unbridled violent masculinity where even the men are scared 24/7).

Why not do something to prevent that instead of letting it get to that point?

In the eyes of those women, you’d rather her feel like shit and a blow up doll/cum receptacle for the validation of a man. It doesn’t sound all that noble to her.

That's just an entirely self centered world view. There is no nobility in attraction. Sexual attraction is an animal urge. Using higher thought to widen the pool of who you find attractive for the sake of society would be noble.

Men agreeing to ignore their nature's so everyone can have a family a spouse a piece of the American dream is noble.

Only fucking chad is not noble no matter how you want to phrase it.

The men here hate religion and call it “sky daddy,” but religion did a superb job at indoctrinating men and women that sacrifice in the realm of sexual desire and proclivity was best for the greater good.

It is? How is it not? It's what allowed society to be built didn't it?

What do you suggest?

Get rid of no fault divorce and impose high taxes on single mothers and unmarried women. The tax burden would be so high it would be more troublesome to not be married.

Then women would pair off with their looksmatch, because they couldn't just detonate society with zero repercussions and couldn't just be chads harem.

The weird thing i find about women in this sub is they screech about marriage having higher incentives being bad, but they are all supposedly happily married.

It wouldn't even effect them but just the idea of some young 4/10 not getting chad dick enrages them. Why?

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Women find 80% of men unattractive chad is just a short hand way of referring to the 20% of men women do find attractive.

Why are women's desires more important or noble than men's? Let's say you're right, which I don't agree with, and I am asking women to ignore their desires.

Why is that less noble than women doing whatever they want society and men be damned? Why is the concept of "if I'm getting mine fuck everyone else" noble in your opinion?

No more no fault divorce along with stiff tax penalties for single women would certainly help.

Women don't like admitting to the concept of looksmatch because it would mean admitting their standards are broken. It's a perfectly reasonable method of assessment. X/10 should be with X/10, or close to it. It's not even really debatable.

The most telling thing is that women DO end up with their looksmatch but only after they decide they are done being used. Proving they know who their match is but don't like to expect it

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The nuclear family was ~~created~~made dominant by the Roman Catholic Church by implementing the Rule of Seven. This refused the recognition of marriages between those closer than second cousins. We carry this restriction in our laws to this day. This had no Biblical basis but was a power grab by the RCC to break up the clans where cousin and closer marriage was frequent. You can actually go to the Middle East now and see the pre-nuclear family since they still operate that way.

EDIT: Created is too strong of a word. There are three major forms of family in the world: clan, nuclear, and matrilineal. All three always exist together in every society. They are the true separators of class. The clans fight each other for territory. The nuclear families either work for the clans or live independently on the edges. The matrilineal families are at the bottom.

A clan is a larger-than-nuclear family, usually highly blood related, that uses its combined wealth and labor to out-compete nuclear families. They usually spring up around income streams like rentable land. Personal property doesn't exist formally. You are the steward of a certain set of the clan's resources with the Patriarch being the head steward.

The nuclear family is the father, mother, and their children for a time. There is usually not enough wealth to support a clan. Each child must eventually fend for themselves and start their own nuclear family.

The matrilineal family is a mother and her children. She usually lives off of prostitution and the generosity of others. The father is usually gone or unknown. Depending on how normalized the family status is, her brothers will actually step in for the father role, for the children only.

There are sometimes mixtures of these. The most famous, recognized version is the Roman concubinus marriage. The traditional manus marriage transferred the bride to the husband's clan. By leaving for her father's house for a few days every year, the bride would avoid this transfer. She retained her status in her father's clan and so did her children.

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I looked it up. Google is a wonderful resource.

Because I don’t need stats to know that people see the world in different ways.

I don't either I need stats to prove the world should be seen a certain way.

I enjoy debating perspectives, not artistically shrieking about numbers

Anecdotes are meaningless though? It's not 'artistic" to say that.

Your opinion is that men cheat a bunch and that means that their choice for monogamous society is meaningless.

My opinion is that we don't have the proper stats to say that men's monogamy based society decision was wrong.

Then you just start being condescending instead of providing stats to back up your claims.

I don't need a source for that men created society or that they chose strict monogamy. If you want to say men are cheating at remarkable rates you must provide a source that isn't less than 10k people from 1960 that was done for the explicit purpose of selling books.

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Lmfao, two virgins don’t get vd.

Here’s some more history for you

In Britain the ideal of the middle-class wife, safely installed with her family in a bourgeois home, was the universal ideal. But the repression of natural urges led to a dark underground world of debauchery and vice. As the purity of the wifely figure was promoted (once-a-month sex was generally considered enough), prostitution became more widespread than ever before. In 1839, in London, a city of two million inhabitants, there were estimated to be around 80,000 prostitutes. Later in the century Prime Minister William Gladstone found the problem so pressing that he would walk the streets himself at night and counsel these working girls. Some courtesans, Lillie Langtry for example, reached the highest echelons of society and even managed to retain an air of respectability. But venereal disease was rife and syphilis spread wildly between prostitutes, their clients and their clients' families (Randolph Churchill, father of Winston, is a well-known example).

One million men and 80,000 whores? Constrained by all that monogamy they decided on?

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What is best for everyone, men women and children.

Okay is that every man, woman, and child or just the select group that one aligns themself with. Because for a substantial portion of history men were perfectly willing and ready to enslave other people to their detriment.

Hypergamy creates single mothers and lonely men. Bad for men women and children.

How so? And what about women who are hypergamous but don't produce children?

Why should we have laws at all if individuals shouldn't care about the greater good?

Society shamed hypergamous women heavily, so even if they wanted to they couldn't because they'd be shunned.

Doesn't that produce unhappy women then, how is that for the greater good?,

Now that nobody is there to scold them they act like children eating ice cream for breakfast when their parents aren't home.

It seems like there's still plenty of people to scold them (try living in the Bible belt of the U.S.) but they just don't seem to care anymore. And don't forget the role men play in hypergamy because it doesn't really work without them

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Yeah, I mean we live in an obesogenic society (which seems to be getting worse) such that mundane ignorance, poor impulse control, etc. make it easy to eat one's self into being overwieght/class I obese (Maybe bump it up to obese/class II obese for short people.) but when we're talking class III obesity and beyond we're probably looking at serious psychological problems and not going to see a lot of ACE scores below four.

My sister and I are in the four or more category (uhh...6 on the 8 scale, which is apparently good for a nice twenty year reduction in life expectancy, and hers may be higher than mine depending on whether she was molested or not) and she eats her feelings/likely has a BMI over 50 while I spent most of my early 20s with a bad enough PTSD and drinking problem that I lost 70lbs in 18 months then kept at a BMI of 22 while drinking enough natty ice or steel reserve to pass or blackout every night (Please don't do this; it's no way to live and I'm glad I didn't die.).

It's heartbreaking to see and frustrating because I/our father and stepmother can't force her to seek psychological help (and there's no guarantee that it'll work; speaking from personal experience it can be immensely helpful but it's not an instant fix and it can take a fair amount of education to find a practitioner that specializes in the particular trauma one is suffering from) and she's well on her way to eating herself immobile.

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I don't find weight lifting fun at all. I resent women for lowering men's productivity and making men work out by selecting for muscles. In the 21st century, muscles have no societal benefits aside from getting women. It's detrimental natural selection (and same with height). Muscles and height don't actually improve society. The physical issues and lower life expectancy of height and the wasted time and food for muscles is bad for society.

Muscles just increase your metabolic rate, slow down your movement and waste food (and time and energy getting that food). Where is the skinny boi love (for average skinny men who aren't tall or genetically gifted)?

I'd rather get outside and jog, bike or play sports instead of staying cooped up in a small space moving iron with other dudes grunting and as an adult, ain't nobody got time to do both.

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Haha, funny story ... the assistant manager at the auto parts store I use is female and we got to chatting one day when I was in buying brake parts. She said that most of the men who come into the store walk right past her and go up to one of the male employees if they have a question, even though she's worked there longer and knows more than most of the guys.

When I went back to return the old calipers for the deposit, she happened to be working that day but a guy was running the register. When I explained that I needed a core refund, sure enough -- he turned to the assistant manager and asked her how to do it!

When I was in high school, I loved working on cars and wanted to go into automotive engineering, but my parents said nobody would hire a girl to do that job and they certainly weren't wasting their hard-earned money to put me through college for it. So I became a waitress instead ... sigh. I'm glad that women nowadays at least have a shot at working in male-dominated professions!

When I applied for the sign job, I didn't figure the contractor would hire me outright, so I told him my boyfriend and I would be working as a team, even though my man is disabled and really isn't up to that kind of heavy work on a regular basis. I was about six months into the job before my boyfriend let it slip to the that I was the one actually doing most of the work, and I guess at that point, the boss must have figured he might as well let me continue. Whew! Been working there going on three years now.

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They get no social validation from cheating

What about personal validation? Remember, women have about the same addiction to social media as men have for porn. This is why women constantly talk about not falling for "manipulation" and constantly fall for the mind games and find men attractive who breaks past her shit tests.

Women often complain they don’t orgasm from casual sex.

Usually women get better orgasms from her cheater than her (non) committed partner. The mix of excitement, taboo, secrecy, etc keeps them engaged. AF/BB is extremely perfect scenario that women dream of all the time, and you can observe this from all their complaints women trot out everyday (online or irl)

Men on the other hand cheat if he is deprived of intimacy or just for sexual release and variety. Secrecy from men is only to cover up those things. The exception though is women with high n count also crave sexual variety and release too.

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Except everyone thinks that no anti SJW Millennials exist and that all Zoomers are all these great anti SJW heroes.

i don't think people generalize the generations like this really, though i will say that it feels like as far as Internet politics goes, millennials are more associated w/ "SJW", liberalism, tumblr, buzzfeed, etc. -- but that doesn't mean every millennial individual is seen like that.

edit: gen z are more associated w/ leftism, anti-capitalism, anti-bigotry, while also a debatably new form of bigotry, anti-SJW, etc.

Zoomers are pretty much worshipped no matter what they do.

i think that's because the majority of zoomers (+ gen alpha) are still kids so kids are coddled.

plus millennials hate us b/c the previous gen always hates the next one it seems, especially people who really identify w/ the generation identity, i think that's just the way life goes (but i hope gen z never grows to be super bitter about younger generations 😅it'll prob still happen but i hope we think about "ok boomer" when that time comes and rethink it perhaps). but i wont call you guys old dont worry!!! <3 love u

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This is quite interesting. I work in aviation where there is a tendency of blaming culture or scapegoating culture. I had difficulty to adapt to this. Especially when my boss would bluntly (and sometimes curse) state something about my performance in front of his other staff involved. I learned that its just his manner of doing accountability efficiently and everyone gets their fair share of this. It taught me a valuable lesson about taking criticism. However, apparently he did the same with my other coworkers before and this (male) coworker reported him to HR quite often due to his manner of speech. Whereas me and a couple of other women he mentored does not. I have seen that women have a tendency to complain in front of other people not trustworthy who distorts the facts and the news gets reported in a negative light to that other party involved and sometimes HR gets involved even though the women did not intend to escalate the situation this way. Office politics in general is a complex maze but most important is to know who you're talking in front of. If you have an issue with someone state it bluntly even though it's uncomfortable but never accusingly. I learned the hard way that this can often clear misunderstanding and wrong assumptions. Instead of reporting to your superior's boss or HR. That just makes you look like you can't handle adult problems.

[–]athrowaway283222blue is my fav color -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link

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here's something that actually happened to me. We had about 5-6 women and 2 guys working in the same general area.

A guy makes a joke to me, essentially teasing me about something. It's innocuous, we lol, we bond, we have a good time and we forget about it.

Next day I'm called into HR office and asked if a guy ever said something offensive to me. By that time I have no clue what they're talking about. They have to explain to me exact wording that was used. I have to dig in my memory bank because it wasn't memorable at all, and explain that it was just a joke and wasn't offensive. Had I said that it was, I suspect that he'd be fired as he was still in trial period.

I learned months later that one woman made another woman report the guy to HR for being mean to me. But the damage has been done in a sense that we were never safe to ever have any fun conversations around women again.

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Every time there is an influx of pinkpill/fds type posts like recently I get really confused over these people's perspective on the relationship between a woman and her personal agency. It really seems absurd how fast and inconsistenly the figurative protagonist women switches from quasi omnipotent, amazing, in control of everything and the foundation of all that is good in the world to a helpless, naive, pure little creature that has no way of identifying and fighting back against the total corruption known as men. Suddenly there is no potency, no agency and they are victims in the devils palm. It's such shallow dichotomic thinking, mostly to keep their own ideology intact... because without both those inconsistent parts together... women would actually be flawed humans...you know... like the other humans

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Suddenly there is no potency, no agency and they are victims in the devils palm.

Being caught off guard or taken by surprise is a thing, you know! I have experienced that sort of brain freeze myself. I'm not so sure most guys wouldn't react the same way under identical circumstances; the difference is probably that it doesn't happen as often. Let's say you're a straight man and your male boss, with whom you've had a totally normal workplace relationship up to this point, calls you into his office then unexpectedly puts his hand on your crotch. Do you think you'd be freaked out? Have the presence of mind to react appropriately? Yeah, maybe not, huh.

I think there is a reflexive or evolutionary component for women as well. In a dangerous situation, our instinct often is to keep your cool, just play along and look for a chance to escape rather than confronting a molester/attacker (who is likely to be bigger and more powerful, physically or socially). Probably we are descended from women who managed to keep their cool and get out of dangerous situations ... because the ones who fought back didn't survive to tell the tale. Unfortunately in modern times this tendency can lead to some post-incident ambiguity, i.e., was she raped even if she seemed to be enjoying it in the moment?

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Not from USA.

As I understand boy and girl scouts do different things/have different programms. so I'm all for boys being able to go to girl scouts and girls - to boy scouts.

Some girls want to do "boy" stuff and some boys want to do "girl" stuff. I'd say allow them.

When I went to school we had crafts class that was separated by sex. Boys and girls were in different classrooms and did different things. Girls were sewing, knitting, cooking learning how to tie a necktie (as I understand so that the wife would be able to tie the necktie for her husband). Boys (as far as I know) were taught how to repair household furniture (and maybe build them) and were repairing school chairs and desks during lessons. One day our teacher got sick, so the boys teacher "took us in". Gave us a pieces of wood and saws. Told us to saw the wood in a straight line without using markers. I enjoyed sawing wood much more than knitting and sewing.

Bonus: is it the girls fault that the boys start to behave differently when a girl is near? Maybe the girl went to the boyscouts because she wanted to do the same stuff that the boys were doing.

[–]angels-fan1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

I'm sympathetic to girls not having a similar experience available to them.

And no, it isn't anybody's fault that the dynamic changes when a girl is introduced into the group. It just is.

We have a multitude of places where girls can gather and be free of the influence of boys and nobody dare try and suggest they should open that up to more feminine boys that might like cooking and sewing and such.

Even things like girl only coder camps where they expressly forbid boys from joining because it intimidates the girls. I would use your own words here, is it the boys fault these girls feel intimidated?

In short, I think it's wholly immoral to break up a boys organization where boys can be boys without the external influence of a girl in their midst just for the sake of the .1% of girls that might want to do boy things.

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https://youtu.be/dASGgwBNSuE

Anyone remember that cartoon, recess? Its crazy to look back at this episode and see how ahead of her time Ms. Grotke was, for better or worse. In the show she is kind of portrayed as a loveable but wacky and eccentric out there hippie.

In the first 30 seconds she is passing out books and says "Now remember class, please take this new history book with a grain of salt, since it focuses primarily on the history of white western males"... "Now lets read about how the barbaric europeans stole this country from the native americans".

In the year 2000 when this was released, im sure most viewers seeing this would find it humorous and percieve it as out of touch and radical, the whole delivery and air of it accommodates that as well. Thats the "joke" and kind of schtick of her character. It would be presented a lot differently if it was meant to be taken seriously, they would have tried to plant a seed instead of just making it a throwaway joke.

Later in the episode she says "Remember class, your essays about how the settlers should have behaved upon their arrival on the shores will be graded for both spelling and sensitivity."

Crazy to think about the attitude shift since then, and how this is basically mainstream these days.

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or because you care about them having a good time?

Sure, I don't think the actual reasons matter much.

how do you know women are the ones bad at it?

Because they're so bad at the easiest type of sex (masturbation). To be fair, the quality of the sex will be more dependent on the guys performance than the girls, since men play a more active role in most sexual encounters (we're usually the ones doing the fucking).

because scissoring, fingering, eating out, etc. can get old and people like to try different things, yeah. speaking of lesbians, they do a better job of satisfying women than men. most women can't cum from PIV.

And I would assume gay dudes have better sex than straight couples. Knowing the equipment your working with is a huge bonus. That's why it's funny that women complain about sex when they can't even figure out their own shit.

[–]athrowaway2832221 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Sure, I don't think the actual reasons matter much.

i feel like they do, but wtv

Because they're so bad at the easiest type of sex (masturbation).

1 in 5 means 80% of women are still cumming from masturbation. again, you know it's much more difficult for a woman to cum. what determines if you're good at sex is how much your partner enjoys it, i think, right?

since men play a more active role in most sexual encounters (we're usually the ones doing the fucking).

sure

And I would assume gay dudes have better sex than straight couples.

i'd assume so because they work w/ the prostate more often lmao

Knowing the equipment your working with is a huge bonus.

true

That's why it's funny that women complain about sex when they can't even figure out their own shit.

women can make other women cum, that's what determines that they're good. it doesn't matter if they can't make themselves cum necessarily i think

[–]NiceGuyNumber41 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

1 in 5 means 80% of women are still cumming from masturbation. again, you know it's much more difficult for a woman to cum. what determines if you're good at sex is how much your partner enjoys it, i think, right?

That's all masturbation. Including women who's clits are beat to death with their vibrating robodicks.

I agree that it's more difficult than men, but that's just because biology requires it for procreation. I firmly believe more women would have good sex if they took more responsibility for their orgasm, including learning their body instead of assuming someone else will do it for them.

i'd assume so because they work w/ the prostate more often lmao

You've clearly never had a bad blowjob. I still shutter when I see girls with big teeth.

women can make other women cum, that's what determines that they're good. it doesn't matter if they can't make themselves cum necessarily i think

If you can't make yourself cum, it's stupid to think someone else will. But that's just women's lack of accountability.

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i've actually never done PIV. :O

Well, take your time, know your body, and know the potential consequences.

i don't plan to anytime soon b/c i place value on it/want to wait. i can get myself off (without toys), and do pretty much whenever i get an itch. my libido might change on antidepressants though, and a lower libido may even be better so i don't get distracted by it during a pandemic when i should be concentrated on studying.

Seems smart. SSRIs didn't lower my libido, but made it almost impossible to cum. Made my ex tap out several times until my body got used to the drugs (off them now and personally discourage their use, but to each their own).

i'm just repeating the common perspectives of other women here

Women do that a lot. They just kinda run with popular opinion even if they know nothing of the subject themselves. Men of course do it, too, but it seems especially prevalent in women. Probably due to women being more social in general.

[–]athrowaway2832221 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Well, take your time, know your body, and know the potential consequences.

thank you for the advice, yes i definitely plan on it 😁

SSRIs didn't lower my libido, but made it almost impossible to cum.

that would suck a lot. i'm going to be on SNRIs but i hope it lowers my libido altogether, not make it harder to cum oof

(off them now and personally discourage their use, but to each their own).

why is that?

Women do that a lot. They just kinda run with popular opinion even if they know nothing of the subject themselves.

i don't do that for everything. i just speak to women about sex on a pretty regular basis, and have a range of n-counts among friends/women that i talk to. logically, it doesn't make sense that sex would be for me to pleasure myself. i can do that on my own (and luckily so can 4 in 5 women!), the point is to make someone else feel good and have that person make me feel good. you don't use logic even if you have never experienced something?

Probably due to women being more social in general.

maybe. i don't consider myself much more social than the average man though, but i do speak to/have spoken to a lot of other women about this b/c i need to know to prepare myself (and they say to prepare myself for disappointment, which makes me not want to even more).

[–]NiceGuyNumber41 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

(off them now and personally discourage their use, but to each their own).

why is that?

My personal experiences were not great, so naturally I'm biased. But after my negative experience I started doing my own research. There actually isn't a whole lot of hard evidence that serotonin levels have anything to do with depression. (It's impossible to measure seratonin levels in living people, IIRC). Nor is there enough research on long term effects to make me comfortable with it.

i don't do that for everything. i just speak to women about sex on a pretty regular basis, and have a range of n-counts among friends/women that i talk to.

It was just a general observation on women and not meant to be about you specifically.

logically, it doesn't make sense that sex would be for me to pleasure myself. i can do that on my own (and luckily so can 4 in 5 women!), the point is to make someone else feel good and have that person make me feel good.

I gave you a few examples of how a women might pleasure herself during intercourse. Perhaps ask your female friends if any of them ever touch themselves or use toys during sex.

you don't use logic even if you have never experienced something?

Idk if logic is the right word for that. But yes I also use other's experiences to try and understand things I haven't experienced myself. That doesn't mean I necessarily believe them or think that my experience will be like theirs.

[–]athrowaway2832221 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

My personal experiences were not great, so naturally I'm biased. But after my negative experience I started doing my own research. There actually isn't a whole lot of hard evidence that serotonin levels have anything to do with depression. (It's impossible to measure seratonin levels in living people, IIRC). Nor is there enough research on long term effects to make me comfortable with it.

makes sense, i don't think it's supposed to be a cure but rather is supposed to subdue some general anxiety and suicidal thoughts. if i feel more negative effects than positive i'd stop though. i think serotonin and norepinephrine respectively have a lot to do with depression and anxiety based on what i've read and learned about in class, but interesting

It was just a general observation on women and not meant to be about you specifically.

yeah i know, i just don't know if it's true that women do that more often than men

But yes I also use other's experiences to try and understand things I haven't experienced myself. That doesn't mean I necessarily believe them or think that my experience will be like theirs.

to each their own

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My dog was attacked by a pit bull a couple of years ago at a dog park and the owner pulled the typical "He's usually so nice and friendly" and then almost immediately contradicted himself by saying actually his dog is aggressive and I should have asked him to put the dog on a leash before I entered the park. (Because, you know, having an aggressive dog at an off leash dog park is a great idea in the first place.) It was like pit bull owner bingo.

Crazy that dogs bred to point will point, dogs bread to herd will herd and dogs bread to fight will _______.

Ding ding ding. People's ignorance on this subject astounds me. I have even known some very sweet pit bulls, and I own an aggressive breed myself, so it's not like I think they can NEVER be good dogs. But they are literal killing machines in the same way border collies are herding machines.

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Please don’t respond unless you are the kind of guy to get upset when women fake orgasms. It doesn’t really shed light on why some guys get upset when you comment “I don’t care if the woman orgasms” or “it’s her responsibility to get herself off”. That isn’t relevant or helpful.

So I’ve noticed something. A lot of men get border line upset when you fake an orgasm. One could say it’s that a nice partner wants to please his lover, right? I am wondering if it’s because when a woman orgasms, she kind of loses control and losing control gives men sort of power over the woman. Maybe guys get upset when women fake it because it stings the pride but more so, it gave the false impression of giving that kind of power over you, when you always had that control and just let him think he did. Does any of that make sense? Any honest guys out there wanna confirm or deny this?

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Thought experiment:

You land on a planet that has two types of creatures, one has laser vision and the other can breathe ice.

The world is chaos and everyone is taking advantage of one another.

So you propose they each give up their respective powers, so that a stable society can be built. They agree with this.

Society flourishes.

Once society is nice and established the ice breathing creatures decide they should be able to breathe ice whenever they want, but that the laser vision creatures should still refrain from shooting lasers.

So now the ice breathers get to enjoy what society built on their broken agreement and it's still illegal for the laser vision creatures to use their power.

Is that fair? Why should the laser vision creatures not use their laser vision? Why should it be legal for only the ice breathers to use their powers?

If you haven't already surmised this thought experiment is meant to explain why society is currently unfair to men.

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How can I believe multiple things at once? Some would say the ability to hold and parse multiple truths simultaneously is a sign of higher intelligence, but I digress...

You clearly missed the gist of that thread.

What incentives do modern women have to do what you want them to do?

Be explicit, what do you wish for modern women to do?

What I did was offer scenarios where women have sex with / engage romantically with men they don’t necessarily desire:

hyper masculine environment where women need men for protection and safety from other men or extreme nature
a conservative environment where a dominant dogma (religion) lists out the sacrifices and harsh penalties (eternal damnation and community exile) for not abiding
institutional disenfranchisement where women are unable to provide for themselves meaningfully, so they must rely on men

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Their natural biological advantages.

Women have sex. They can basically dangle sex as a carrot to get what they want.

This is why women weren't killed in wars.

Men have superior physical strength, they can use this as a threat real or implied to get what they want.

When society was formed men agreed to not use their biological advantage of strength in return women had to pair off early and stay married so they couldn't lord sex over men to get what they want.

Then women decided holding up their end of this bargain was oppression and now they are free to use their natural advantage to get what they want but men are still expected to observe their original agreement.

The questionI'm asking is if that seems fair and what compels the men to continue observing the deal women broke? Why was women's end of the bargain oppression but men's isn't/ wasnt?

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The only reason women weren't subject to laser vision is because they were using ice breath.

Women absolutely could use sex to get what they wanted in nature. The only issue was it was not an absolute power.

Women chose the men, men made the choices. Even in modern times women prefer dominant men. You're acting like they would have chosen passive men that would let them call the shots when that's just nonsense.

Men controlled women to the extent that they did (I don't agree with victim porn nonsense women always had a say) because women wanted to be controlled.

So you're saying current society is specifically unfair to Men and that's okay because there was a point in society where it was unfair to women? So it's like a tit for tat? The Men of modern times need to suffer inequality because women who lived long ago had to suffer from men who lived long ago?

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Rape is illegal and some coercion illegal, but there are plenty of gray areas men exploit. Don't pretend not to know what I'm talking about

I don't know what you're talking about. People are losing their jobs and being asked to resign for asking women if they can kiss them.

I thought that was literally what you were supposed to do, ask for consent. But now asking a woman you find attractive to kiss is sexual harassment.

And then they have to deal with 1) a furious man,

Who will go to jail if he acts on his fury.

a man they're gonna have to have sex with at some point.

In return due whatever you want.

Most women don't do this because not everyone has the kind of personality that can handle manipulating people. And there's ultimately no benefit to it

Every non disabled or disfigured woman cashes in on their pussy privileges. When there were harsh social stigmas against divorce and cheating, women couldn't leverage their sexuality in this way.

This is why women said they were oppressed, because they knew they had power they couldn't use.

Because the dangling-carrot woman who's avoiding unwanted sex with man...is doing a gross performative dance that feels just as degrading being a cam girl would

And yet they do

[–]kissmetilyouredrunk1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

People are losing their jobs and being asked to resign for asking women if they can kiss them.

In some hyper-woke work places. Sexual harassment has happened to me at jobs before, no one cared. And the work place is only one place men interact with women

Who will go to jail if he acts on his fury.

After he does something really terrible to you. Women have evolved to be wary of that

In return due whatever you want.

Most men aren't this desperate. And most women don't do this because they know from personal experience that when a man feels like he's owed sex, he'll act like he's owed sex. And the consequences could be pretty terrible for you

Every non disabled or disfigured woman cashes in on their pussy privileges.

Give me specific examples of the kind of things they do

And yet they do

And it feels degrading and awful. Try it yourself. Go to a gay bar, find a man, lead him on, see if you can manipulate him "to do anything" (lol), and deny him access to your body at the last minute

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I’ve seen a lot of women say that men will hit on them or flirt with them in person, but when it’s time to ask for the number/date it doesn’t happen. It only really happens online, meaning most of the time they get asked out its online.

It’s like the internet either instagram, Snapchat or traditional sites allow dudes to be bold in a way they wouldn’t IRL. This is also a reason why some women complain that guys talk one way online but when it comes to the date they’re really shy in person.

I told this story before of One girl I knew who said she met this guy on match. They exchanged numbers And he was very flirtatious and sexually aggressive. She was cool with that cause she thought he was hot and wanted to fuck him lol. The date comes and dude is very shy IRL, she’s like where was this charismatic dude who said he couldn’t wait to get his hands on her.

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Speaking of the “duping thread”, How exactly does “lying” to get sex work? The most common example I hear from women is “him saying he loves you when he doesn’t believe it”.

But if I lie to Scarlett Johannson and tell her I love her she’s not gonna fuck me, she kinda has to want to fuck you before. If it was that easy, older virgins would be going up to girls they like saying I love you and the panties would start dropping left and right.

Now that I think about it I’ve slept with over 30 women but only said “I love you” to about 5 girls(4 GF’s) in my life and they all fucked me BEFORE I said that, whether I was lying or not(I wasn’t) My current GF is an example, we were smashing before anybody said I love you. Honestly I said it for the first time about 2 weeks ago, and I’ve been fucking for like 2 months now.

I would argue that the vast majority of sexual encounters(like 90%) happen before the guy says “I love you”, whether he’s telling the truth or not. A lie to get sex to me would be Like, “I play for the knicks”, so you fuck em because you think he’s a millionaire and will change your life lol.

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A hot guy with no job can still be suave, confident, charming, and command a space with his presence. All of these things inspire respect. A woman with a job or without a job can be seduced by him. Hell he prob garner the respect of hella men too. She will only begin to lose attraction if his lack of job starts affecting her lifestyle. Which is when his incompetence on the “earning a living” axis will be top of mind and turn her off.
yeh. Incompetent has a definition. One can be incompetent at something. A man could be incompetent at inspiring female arousal, but totally competent at pedantic and inane Reddit quibbles.
I never said a woman can’t find a man you think is a loser hot? I literally said a woman like snookie may find a loser like a jersey bro “hot.”

I think you’re confused

Yes I think you are.

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hot guy with no job can still be suave, confident, charming, and command a space with his presence.

Halo effect. You think he's these things BECAUSE he's hot.

Hell he prob garners the respect of hella men too.

Jobless fuckboys don't get respect in the same way that people who inherent millions don't get respect.

yeh. Incompetent has a definition. One can be incompetent at something. A man could be incompetent at inspiring female arousal, but totally competent at pedantic and inane Reddit quibbles.

All you need to inspire arousal is looks and she will fill in the blanks aka halo effect.

You CAN inspire arousal other ways but if you are good looking enough you don't need to, it will be ascribed to you regardless of what you do.

A quiet reserved ugly guy is a loser the same guy but hot is mysterious.

A short guy who thinks he's tough has a complex but a tall guy who thinks he's tough will likely be seen as tough

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I don't agree. By default women will halo effect attractive men.

Two men with the same mannerisms, one hot and one not will have different assessments from women.

Looks absolutely create tingles or women wouldn't admire make models and the like.

The only one hamstering is you. You can't admit the halo effect is real and two guys who look different but act the same will be considered differently by women.

Got guy is reserved and quiet?

He's mysterious.

Ugly guy reserved and quiet? Friendless loser.

The best example of this was my buddy and his ex. He got her number at a party from her friend and started texting her.

She loved it and would say how cute it was.

I asked her how she would have felt if the same thing happened and he was an ugly guy.

It struck her like something she'd never even considered and she said it would have been creepy

[–]GridReXX2 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

We rarely agree so nothing new here.

A man who looks like a troll but has a commanding presence will garner my respect and depending on the moment might get me to view him sexually despite his looks.

A man who looks like a model but has a commanding presence will garner my respect, and because he’s cuter-faced, I’d be more open to thinking about him sexually because his face doesn’t scare me.

Why can’t you admit that the halo works with behavioral cues?

Men here seem to only apply it to looks and it’s inaccurate.

As I just described, a man who is quietly commanding in his presence triggers something in most women and will have her double take add /a sexual lens even if he doesn’t “look like Adonis”

That is a sexual halo created by behavioral cues that inspire respect and arousal in women.

Also I am only talking about faces.

A man who is slovenly and blubbery and smells and looks gross and unclean could never garner my respect at all. How he presents would signal to me he doesn’t have respect for himself.

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[–]GridReXX2 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Define “attractiveness.”

We’ll never agree. Men and women calculate sexual attractiveness very differently.

edit

halo effect: the tendency for an impression created in one area to influence opinion in another area.

The halo effect is a type of cognitive bias in which our overall impression of a person influences how we feel and think about their character. Essentially, your overall impression of a person ("He is nice!") impacts your evaluations of that person's specific traits ("He is also smart!").

“Halo effect” is not exclusive to “he has pretty face so I think he’s funny too!”

This is the myopic application many men here use.

“Studies” about attractiveness exist because men are obsessed with it. It’s why there’s a plethora of non peer reviewed studies about “n count and women,” but less about “n count and men.” Because women don’t give a fuck.

And women don’t need a study to explain the obvious that I described that seems to not be clicking.

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I find the constant refusal to understand what is being said “hamstering” by men.

It's not a refusal, it's that BPs consistently say contradictory things, then get angry when this is pointed out. Turning to shaming and slander instead of realizing that what they are saying is logically inconsistent with both their actions and previously espoused beliefs.

For example we start with:

A hot guy with no job

Right off the bat you've established that she knows this man is unemployed.

She will only begin to lose attraction if his lack of job starts affecting her lifestyle. Which is when his incompetence on the “earning a living” axis will be top of mind and turn her off.

And then we hit this. Now it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that man without job = man with no money. If it wasn't an issue initially why is it suddenly an issue later/down the road? Why have the goal posts moved?

Either women are completely retarded, or they are intentionally ignoring clear and obvious red flags (I choose to believe the latter... but BPs seem insistent on convincing me it's the former).

We know young men are retarded and do these sorts of dumb things all the time. But we don't coddle them, we tell them to stop being dumb-asses and 'don't stick your dick in crazy' and similar shit.

But when women say or do dumb shit somehow they feel they are granted immunity to their dumbassery and shouldn't be called on it?

It's not because of 'changing life goals' or 'manipulation' (at least not on his part) or 'incompatibility' or any other ridiculous post-hoc rationalization you ladies come up with. It's because you let your vagina do your thinking for you. It's only 'complicated' because the truth is something you don't want to admit.

[–]GridReXX1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]Kaisha0012 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Who said she was investing in him long term?

Because in the context of the thread your reply was an example of how women get 'deceived' or 'manipulated', with some weird tangent into 'respect' that made zero sense.

And before you say 'nuhh uhh' this was literally the 1st line:

Speaking of the “duping thread”, How exactly does “lying” to get sex work?

But let's say that's not sufficient. Even you said:

She will only begin to lose attraction if his lack of job starts affecting her lifestyle. Which is when his incompetence on the “earning a living” axis will be top of mind and turn her off.

When would this ever happen if he was only a 'hot fuck'? There's no reason his lack of employment would have any impact on her lifestyle if all she is doing is fucking him on the side.

Given the context of the thread, and in the very response you made, you've contradicted yourself.

I find the constant refusal to understand what is being said “hamstering” by men.

It's called hamstering (I mean I prefer the term mental gymnastics or cognitive obfuscation but PPD vernacular and all) because it makes no sense. You say completely contradictory things, sometimes in the span of nothing more than a few sentences.

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There's no recovering from that. You can't form a relationship with a woman who was sleeping with someone else while you were dating.

This post, red pilled AF

Imagine looking back at your relationship if you stayed with her. Remembering your first date or that time you went to your favorite restaurant together. Now realise that she probably went back to his and got fucked afterwards, or that she was texting him to arrange their next session while you sat talking happily.

lol at OP defending her:

She said since our first date she stopped trying to meet people and didn't go on dates with anyone else, but also continued sleeping with this other guy because it took so long for things to get serious between us.

She wasn't meeting new people because she was already dating (fucking) someone else

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Doesn't make it true just because I think it, does it?

there's literally no way to know if a person likes you unless they show it to you. words are meaningless ("i love you" blegh), actions show true intentions. so if a person doesn't show someone that they like them, intentions can get misconstrued. i know b/c i am a perpetrator of terrible communication but i try to do better.

She's sitting there like: "omg I didn't receive a love letter from him in 2 months, he must not love me anymore!!!"

Meanwhile the guy is sitting in the dirty foxhole, sieging Carthage for 3 years.

cute reference, but texting/calling someone everyday because you like talking to them and want to get to know them (especially when you're not living together) is expected nowadays from both ends, does it really sound so ridiculous to you that people like to talk to express interest? 😅radio silence or minimal interaction could mean he's just playing with you, leading you on, doesn't like your personality. why would someone want that?

i think OP in this case knows he likes her b/c he shows it in other ways but usually this is just the bare minimum today.

[–]geyges🐇 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (22 children) | Copy Link

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[–]DragoonXFury25 Yr Black Virgin Skater Nitbag -1 points0 points1 point 5 years ago (20 children) | Copy Link

[–]angels-fan3 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]DragoonXFury2 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Interestingly enough, a lot of people thought she was user who newly arrive on the PPD scene but she mentioned that she had previously been posting here for user under more than one username.

Here's a screenshot for proof: (yes, I said this because I had a gut feeling this may come in handy someday...)

https://ibb.co/n02GMKc

Putting that aside... I remember in the beginning of her arrival (under her new username), a lot of people (mostly male users) couldn't wait to tear her a new one but couldn't she didn't "ride the CC", had an N count of 1, lost her virginity late to a non-archetypical "Chad" and was autistic. She was the embodiment of an "unicorn"; NAWALT.

The other reason people couldn't because she never (really) resorted to berate or slander or showcase bitterness about men as a whole. In fact, she was quite the opposite.

[–]angels-fan1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]athrowaway2832221 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

i just looked up her account and her commenting style is very different from mine :o where's the splattering of emojis? the lame attempts at (mostly gen z) humor??

i do switch b/w a serious tone in some comments though, my own form of code switching to let 'em know when i'm to be taken 10000% seriously 😤

It's like I'm already seeing 🦋 and 🌈 whenever I read whatever you write (which sounds like my kind of girl).

HAHA i just text like this and can't be bothered not to let personality show even on the ever-serious reddit (also virgin anime nerds are my fav type of boy, as a fellow virgin anime nerd 😌).

Unfortunately not a twin, she's almost twice your age (well, that is what she says...)

i seee interesting

Didn't you see my flair? I'm a NPC. My best work is done in the shadows....

i do be an npc too tbh 😹i'm here to give everyone a good mouthful of bluepill/no pill

edit: i also discovered this sub by chance, and this is named "throwaway" but it's really basically my main acct at this point b/c i created the other one for like no reason when im mainly commenting on this sub or lurking 😭

[–]DragoonXFury1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

i just looked up her account and her commenting style is very different from mine :o where's the splattering of emojis? the lame attempts at (mostly gen z) humor??

Well, she did have a tendency for writing like that on PPD. Her age perhaps shows but similar in essence.

i do switch b/w a serious tone in some comments though, my own form of code switching to let 'em know when i'm to be taken 10000% seriously 😤

Are you an xxFP by any chance? Kind of reminds of the Genie from Aladdin.

HAHA i just text like this and can't be bothered not to let personality show even on the ever-serious reddit (also virgin anime nerds are my fav type of boy, as a fellow virgin anime nerd 😌)

Oh really? Perhaps I attract a certain type of woman then. 😉 The mysterious ones who like to elaborately put on a persona... 😏

i do be an npc too tbh 😹i'm here to give everyone a good mouthful of bluepill/no pill

According the PPD continuity and narrative, virgin women are highly "desirable" so you cannot be an NPC by default. 😱

[–]athrowaway2832222 points 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Well, she did have a tendency for writing like that on PPD. Her age perhaps shows but similar in essence.

omg maybe we could be friends... do you think it'd be weird to message her...? jkjk

Are you an xxFP by any chance? Kind of reminds of the Genie from Aladdin.

the way you're spot on, i'm an ENFP lmao like consistently and i've taken multiple tests and also tried to determine the functions on my own. so cool!! but i feel like i am very much in the exact middle on the introvert-extrovert scale.

i'm also constantly wondering whether i have ADD/ADHD and apparently a lot of ENFPs wonder the same thing

Oh really? Perhaps I attract a certain type of woman then. 😉 The mysterious ones who like to elaborately put on a persona... 😏

no elaborate persona here, i'm just myself !!! but yes maybe you do, like attracts like after all 😌(p.s. speaking of anime what are your favorites??)

According the PPD continuity and narrative, virgin women are highly "desirable" so you cannot be an NPC by default. 😱

apparently, for some reason (very archaic imo), but i'm always gonna be out here defending my promiscuous sisters 😤heavy on the bluepill teehee

[–]DragoonXFury1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

omg maybe we could be friends... do you think it'd be weird to message her...? jkjk

Well, if do decide to give her a message, tell her "Dragoon said 'Hi'".

the way you're spot on, i'm an ENFP lmao like consistently and i've taken multiple tests and also tried to determine the functions on my own. so cool!! but i feel like i am very much in the exact middle on the introvert-extrovert scale.

I had a massive hunch that you're an ENFP but I said xxFP to cover my bases. I was actually hoping you were in fact an ENFP.

the way you're spot on, i'm an ENFP lmao like consistently and i've taken multiple tests and also tried to determine the functions on my own. so cool!! but i feel like i am very much in the exact middle on the introvert-extrovert scale.

Well, ENFPs are often considered to be introverted extroverts due to them being preoccupied in their own fantasy lands (Ne and Fi).

i'm also constantly wondering whether i have ADD/ADHD and apparently a lot of ENFPs wonder the same thing

Yep, a lot do. It sounds like an ENFP thing. Probably due to the overbearing Ne and lack of Si.

no elaborate persona here, i'm just myself !!! but yes maybe you do, like attracts like after all 😌(p.s. speaking of anime what are your favorites??)

Exactly, like Genie. All those "impersonations" are actually just extensions of himself (Ne and Fi) and knows exactly how to enact them like you in the comments (Te).

Well, I'm an INFJ so I do on elaborate personas (cough cough my flair).

My favourite anime are Dragon Ball Z, Ghost in a shell: Stand alone complex, Bleach, The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya and Yu-Gi-Oh! GX.

apparently, for some reason (very archaic imo), but i'm always gonna be out here defending my promiscuous sisters 😤heavy on the bluepill teehee

Ah well, that's PPD for you.

[–]athrowaway2832221 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Well, if do decide to give her a message, tell her "Dragoon said 'Hi'".

definitely will do!!

I had a massive hunch that you're an ENFP but I said xxFP to cover my bases. I was actually hoping you were in fact an ENFP.

niiiiice you're so good at this!! i can never get how some ppl are so good at this tbh haha one of my friends speaks using a lot of the function terminology too and to me it's like tongues :O sometimes, although astrology is even more of a pseudoscience, people also happen to be spot on with that and it's v interesting. do you have positive interactions w/ ENFPs usually?

Yep, a lot do. It sounds like an ENFP thing. Probably due to the overbearing Ne and lack of Si.

**_** probably haha still trying to figure out function speak.

Exactly, like Genie. All those "impersonations" are actually just extensions of himself (Ne and Fi) and knows exactly how to enact them like you in the comments (Te).

sounds like me!

(cough cough my flair).

a masterpiece of a flair tbh

My favourite anime are Dragon Ball Z, Ghost in a shell: Stand alone complex, Bleach, The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya and Yu-Gi-Oh! GX.

good taste!!! i grew up watching DB & DBZ (as well as Naruto, Pokemon, Yugioh at times but that's definitely much more blurry to me, Sailor Moon, and some others). special place in my heart for them. along with some shonen faves (Naruto + Shippuden, HunterxHunter, Jujutsu Kaisen, etc.), i'm definitely also into seinen (like AOT, fave), romance, and shojo animes personally 🙈

Ah well, that's PPD for you.

that's what i've come to understand haha

[–]DragoonXFury1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

niiiiice you're so good at this!! i can never get how some ppl are so good at this tbh haha one of my friends speaks using a lot of the function terminology too and to me it's like tongues :O sometimes, although astrology is even more of a pseudoscience, people also happen to be spot on with that and it's v interesting. do you have positive interactions w/ ENFPs usually?

Thank you. I'm very interested psychoanalysis and social dynamics so I spend a lot of my free time researching and looking up related to that stuff. I've also spent a lot time studying the different types and the functions.

I actually don't know much about astrology but I'm willing to find out more about it with someone who is well versed in it (I'm naturally curious about almost anything).

Hmmm... I have a few ENFP friends and we get on really well. I also have an younger sister who is an ENFP and we get on very well. (I hear INFJs and ENFPs are very compatible types?) Can't really speak for romance though but I do easily find ENFP girls attractive.

_ probably haha still trying to figure out function speak.

Yeah, kind of similar to how people speak on PPD with all the terminology. I would say the function speak becomes more easier to understand when you become well verse in the cognitive function theory.

a masterpiece of a flair tbh

Yep, and that 23 is gonna become 24 soon!

good taste!!! i grew up watching DB & DBZ (as well as Naruto, Pokemon, Yugioh at times but that's definitely much more blurry to me, Sailor Moon, and some others). special place in my heart for them. along with some shonen faves (Naruto + Shippuden, HunterxHunter, Jujutsu Kaisen, etc.), i'm definitely also into seinen (like AOT, fave), romance, and shojo animes personally 🙈

That's cool, I spent my childhood watching these shows too. DBZ still remains my favourite all-time anime though.

I actually read Attack On Titan but I might watch the anime eventually. I also think it's shounen and not seinen.

No shame in shoujo and romance. I love romance too. The physical manga collection I actually own is a shoujo manga called Full Moon Wo/O Sagashite. The first anime I went out of my way to watch in my own time on the computer was Peach Girl (I also rewatched it recently).

Target demographic doesn't mean much to me. I watch whatever I'm interested in watching. Two of my favourite all time shows are 90210 and Pretty Little Liars.

I'm not a gatekeeper.

[–]athrowaway2832221 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Thank you. I'm very interested psychoanalysis and social dynamics so I spend a lot of my free time researching and looking up related to that stuff. I've also spent a lot time studying the different types and the functions.

i'm interested in psychoanalysis as well!! i feel like i can get a really good read on people, but i struggle with categorizing them in any sense. that's really cool.

I actually don't know much about astrology but I'm willing to find out more about it with someone who is well versed in it (I'm naturally curious about almost anything).

i know a bit about astrology, it's cute and i don't entirely believe in it but i do like conversing about it. i'm also very naturally curious haha if i had all the time in the world, all i'd do is talk to people about different things they're knowledgeable in

Hmmm... I have a few ENFP friends and we get on really well. I also have an younger sister who is an ENFP and we get on very well. (I hear INFJs and ENFPs are very compatible types?) Can't really speak for romance though but I do easily find ENFP girls attractive.

nice!!! yes one of my best friends is an INFJ, we definitely get on pretty well :)

funny enough, just a few minutes ago i saw an MBTI type tiktok pop up on my feed about ENFPs (i never had MBTI type tiktoks pop up before haha). the way that tiktok literally just reads my mind (and internet history probably)...

it was about how ENFPs are so super social w/ introverts but go a little blank w/ other extroverts. i guess this plays into that ambivertedness that most ENFPs have, b/c that is so relatable.

I would say the function speak becomes more easier to understand when you become well verse in the cognitive function theory.

definitely. i've become well-versed (against my will ahhhh) in PPD-speak haha.

Yep, and that 23 is gonna become 24 soon!

happy early birthday!!! i'm up another decade a little later this year too oof i kind of want to just freeze time or stop the earth and step off haha

DBZ still remains my favourite all-time anime though.

a quality classic 💯

I actually read Attack On Titan but I might watch the anime eventually. I also think it's shounen and not seinen.

awesome!!! yeah a lot of people read it but i don't want to spoil it for myself.. i already had some things spoiled by accident oops but it's beautifully animated. i see, i thought it was seinen but it does have the typical shounen elements as well!

No shame in shoujo and romance. I love romance too. The physical manga collection I actually own is a shoujo manga called Full Moon Wo/O Sagashite. The first anime I went out of my way to watch in my own time on the computer was Peach Girl (I also rewatched it recently).

yes of course haha, no shame! i know of men, women who watch and read shoujo/romance as well, they're beautiful genres. interesting, i'm going to search up that manga haha cool! Peach Girl is definitely a classic.

Target demographic doesn't mean much to me. I watch whatever I'm interested in watching. Two of my favourite all time shows are 90210 and Pretty Little Liars.

I'm not a gatekeeper.

same here for sure.

[–]DragoonXFury1 point 5 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

i'm interested in psychoanalysis as well!! i feel like i can get a really good read on people, but i struggle with categorizing them in any sense. that's really cool.

To be fair, I spend a lot of time abstracting and conceptualising things so I got good at categorising.

funny enough, just a few minutes ago i saw an MBTI type tiktok pop up on my feed about ENFPs (i never had MBTI type tiktoks pop up before haha). the way that tiktok literally just reads my mind (and internet history probably)...

I think it's getting to the point that it has passed pretty blatant to almost embarrassing now. Google knows you are on PPD 24/7 (well almost 24/7).

it was about how ENFPs are so super social w/ introverts but go a little blank w/ other extroverts. i guess this plays into that ambivertedness that most ENFPs have, b/c that is so relatable.

I think my sister mentioned she experiences this as well as an ENFP. I think this common for both INFJs and ENFPs. I'm more reactive in temperament than ENFPs depending on the environment so I come across both ways at times too.

happy early birthday!!! i'm up another decade a little later this year too oof i kind of want to just freeze time or stop the earth and step off haha

Planning on taking a lot psychedelics with my friends so definitely looking forward to it.

awesome!!! yeah a lot of people read it but i don't want to spoil it for myself.. i already had some things spoiled by accident oops but it's beautifully animated. i see, i thought it was seinen but it does have the typical shounen elements as well!

I know what you're saying but there's actually a more simple way of figuring out. You look demographic is made for. AOT is published in a shounen magazine so that determines its demographic.

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I don't think it's most ppl tbh, I think most ppl are okay with sporadic texting if the communication is consistent enough for them

could be true!! i feel like this gen is really big on texting/calling/facetiming as ways of communication on a daily basis, from my experience. but nothing beats actual quality time in person

lmao, is it really that rare ? I know a couple of other ppl who ditched smartphones and either have a nokia 3310 type of phone or pulled out their old blackberry

this... is actually so freaking cool. i don't know anyone who's done this (except maybe for a burner phone) but whenever i see someone bringing back 2000s shit it's always cool af to me

yeah we can still call through his flip phone but texting long sentences isn't possible. its really a 2010 flip phone where you have to push 3 times to get the letter you want lmao yeah at home he does, he just never takes it outside lol

ahh i seee, wow what a throwback. why doesn't he take it outside if u dont mind me asking? curious

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Women can't be pressured into sex.

If someone that you don't like is asking you for a favor, it's easy to say no.

But when women feel conflicted when being pressured, it's because they actually like the guy. Women are contemplating trading sex for the attention. If a women has sex when she feels she is being pressured, it's because she really likes the man, because her need for his validation and attention supersedes her feelings of being pressured. It's a tradeoff that women make: his attention and validation for sex with her.

If a woman has sex with a man pressuring her, she must really like that man.

I'll break down the other part of the psychology. Because women get into hypergamous relationships and get free attention without giving any value in return, they feel indebted to men because without sex, the women simply aren't offering much value to the men as the men offer to them. Women then feel that they must have sex to make the relationship more balanced instead of being a value leech, because they know they're not valuable and are not satisfying the needs of the men.

[–]thefaultinmyfart 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You do have a point that many women seek validation from men and thus when a men starts seeking sex they give in due to this craving of attention. This is why I always recommend that before a she starts dating, a women should seek self validation first so she is not emotionally desperate for validation from men or anyone for that matter. This is why I pay attention to my spirituality, mental state and emotional state. Get therapy. If you can't afford that seek self help books, podcast, cultivate your spirituality (through any way, philosophy, religion, taking nature walks and reflecting). This advice applies for both men and women but women I think tend to be more emotionally desperate in relationships if they don't have this sorted out and think a relationship will give them the validation they need.

It's true that psychologically we are more blind to the treatment of people we consider friends or like. This is why you need to properly judge people who approach you (but still he very classy and kind in how you treat people even the ones that don't meat your standard). When you can self validate yourself, i find you know your worth. Because you put work in your self to make yourself someone deserving of a good relationship. You will also tend to take more accountability of your actions. You will also not give your heart so easily to a man that is not treating you right.

So yes, if there is an imbalance in value worth women will try to compensate with sex. That's why women need to put more effort into cultivating their value. Firstly they will not feel inferior. Secondly they will know themselves if they really do like you and take accountability of their actions enough to reflect on their choices if they take the chance on you.

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"Watch what women do, not what women say" is somewhat misguided. Yes, what you obeserve women do should take precedence, but what they say should not be completely discounted out of hand. I think a more nuanced view would be to not take what women say at face value. Once you develop a redpill lens, you can more effectively sus out what they are actually saying. You can also get insights into their motivations, worldview, thought processes and from there reverse engineer it for your own gain.

Take for one example women's hysteria about being raped or killed. Now you might personally think its overblown, but you should definitely account for the fact that this is something baked right into most women's consciousness, regardless if you think it is valid or not. What should you do with this information? You should put some effort into disarming them of that fear. Yesterday was kind of a lightbulb moment for me, after having sex with that woman who believed I was so considerate even though my intent is simply to use her for sex.

Lets look at Ted Bundy. When he was luring women to his car, he wasnt coming up to them acting like a deranged killer. No, he was acting like an affable stand up young man. Im sure the thought of him killing them was not even something that passed through most of their minds until it was too late.

Now of course im not saying you should be exactly like Good Ole Ted 🤣. But theres something to take from this. There can be value in what women say, you just have to learn to filter through the BS and then use it for your advantage.

Oh yeah, on a side note:

Amogus

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I don’t even know why i bother with this garbage sub anymore. You can’t even make mention of typical human dynamics that any normal person recognizes as universal without getting attacked by these dudes who, IDK, I think just get triggered by any mention of sex simply because they aren’t getting any or aren’t getting the sex they think they deserve.

Literally guys calling themselves red pill — a sub that teaches men how to manipulate their way into women’s pants — saying men don’t lie to get sex.

Smdh

And btw downvoting something — besides being against the rules here — doesn’t make it not true in the real world.

Edit again: reading more of the responses I think the real knee jerk is anything that challenges their belief that women are swimming in privilege and thus never experience anything bad that wasn’t their fault.

TLDR: you can’t talk to 90% of the men on this sub anymore. Their minds are closed. There’s just no point.

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Again if evolution cared about women's pleasure, intercourse would be orgasmic 100% of the time

Right so it don't care at all if you like hot men or not. If it didn't care about your pleasure you would not get pleasure from sex with hot men.

Your saying evolution cares about your pleasure with hot men.

Being disgusted and terrified by sex with low value men has nothing to do with pleasure.

That doesn't make sense since those feelings are what prevent you from getting pleasure from sex with ugly men.

In fact it shows what intercourse can be for women—violating, horrific, traumatic, etc

BUT WHY would evolution care? Why would evolution ensure sex with ugly men be traumatic if it didn't care about female pleasure?

Female arousal exists to encourage women to have sex, but they only want sex with the right man, in the right context.

Which is to say evolution compels you to look for pleasurable sex when you just said it didn't care about your pleasure!

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Why would evolution care what you think is traumatic if it doesn't care about your pleasure?

This makes no sense. It has nothing to do with pleasure. Evolution wants us to do things that improve our fitness and avoid things that are dangerous. How does sexual pleasure factor in to not wanting a man's low value genes?

Rape is the number one porn category and sexual fantasy statistically speaking.

Among women who watch a lot of porn. They're already outliers. The idea is a hot guy finds you irresistible, not that you develop PTSD. Incest porn is popular too, does that mean men want to bang their own mothers?

Are more likely to have pleasurable sex with them

You're assuming women agree to sex for the same reasons men do. Women can sleep with hots guys and still not get off. And they'll keep sleeping with them, and not getting off. Women who have painful sex keep having sex

We're talking about avoiding gross, horrible experiences, not seeking guaranteed orgasms

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But the way that it compelled women to do this, according to you, is to make sex more pleasurable than it would be with ugly men. Which means evolution DOES care about women's pleasure because it used that to, according to you, get "high value genes"

Further high value in pre historic life meant strongest not the prettiest. The one who could Protect you best and provide you the most resources.

The one with the prettiest face was not beneficial other than a esthetically.

Thick hair? Nope, not beneficial, yet women love them.

Blue eyes? Nope, more likely to go blind, yet women love them.

So why is it if it's evolution compelling you to choose the best genes that you're not choosing specifically for strength speed and dexterity?

It's very simple, because modern women are not compelled by biology but vanity.

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I don't really care what you believe we have the stats.

Show me the stats that say 1/3 of women cum from PIV sex with no clitoral stimulation at all. Everything I've read on the subject indicates that 1/3 of women cum during PIV, but that doesn't necessarily mean that they cum purely from vaginal penetration with no clitoral stimulation.

What's the harm in just getting out of your own head about it?

There is none, and I agree with you that a lot of women need to relax and that being neurotic/tense can get in the way of an orgasm for a lot of women even if the right parts are being stimulated. But the right parts still need to be stimulated.

Personally I have never had any neurosis around orgasms, I am not preoccupied with orgasms during sex at all, and I can count on one hand the number of sexual encounters that did not include an orgasm for me. I have had orgasms during foreplay and during PIV. I have had orgasms alone and with men. My first orgasm with a guy was just from grinding against his leg with jeans on and I was surprised when it happened because I was so preoccupied making out with him I didn't even realize I was about to have an orgasm, that's how not "in my head" I was. But the one thing all of these orgasms had in common was that my clitoris was being stimulated, directly or indirectly. Because that's what causes women to have orgasms. It's not magic.

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There should be a women tax. A tax to all women for having female privilege in their social and sexual lives.

Female privilege:

Dating: Sex obviously is a huge benefit. Even without sex, women have a ton of privilege. Women can easily go on enjoyable dates. The free food, attention and entertainment women can get with little effort is huge. Women can easily get any man to do emotional labor for her, to listen to her and her problems, to give her attention, to entertain her. Women can't be lonely: at any point in time, women can go online to find someone to chat with who will do all of the above. Yes, there are creeps but it's not hard to filter them out.
Social life: Women get invited to social gatherings more often. Women can more easily get into parties, clubs and bars, and for free and without waiting in line. When meeting new people in groups (joining a club or meetup event), women are more socially accepted into groups then men. Women can more easily make friends with both women and men.
Household income hypergamy: Women can more easily marry men who have higher income than men can marry women with higher income. A woman with $X personal income will have a much higher household income than a man with $X personal income because the man has to marry down in income while the woman can marry up.
Better careers because more free time: Everyone is spending time optimizing for dating and social life (#1 and #2). Dating and social life are extremely important, almost a human need. Because women have their dating and social lives on easy mode, they have much more free time than men. Women have more time to spend to better their careers because of their female privilege.

So much of people's lives and fortunes are dictated by their gender. One gender has more privilege than the other. Right now, there isn't equal opportunity for life happiness across genders. Women, the privileged gender, should be taxed to make the world more equitable and equal opportunity.

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Weekly Community Chat Megathread

Comments

Boycott breakfast

And hey, it owned some of the boomers for us too!

Title	Weekly Community Chat Megathread
Author	AutoModerator
Upvotes	13
Comments	2804
Date	March 1, 2021 9:00 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/lvkecv/weekly_community_chat_megathread/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/weekly-community-chat-megathread.1191841 https://theredarchive.com/post/1191841