Any unusual flags/traits you look out for in women?

HydrazineHawk · 2023-06-17T18:41:15+00:00

All her “hobbies” revolve around consumption (watch TV, eating, social media, shopping)

Anxious_Adult123 · 2023-06-17T17:49:55+00:00

Addictions
Cant keep a job
Cant maintain personal finances
Too many failed relationships in a very short period of time : nothing to do if she had sex or not.
Can't keep a conversation forward
Extreme beliefs- political or religious
Too sensitive to jokes- I'm a funny guy.
Personality disorders- eg: BPD, Antisocial personality disorder, Narcissistic PD etc.

ShizoDijagnoza · 2023-06-17T18:40:29+00:00

Taste in expensive and tasteless jewelry - Think Cartier stacking bands, Van cleef anything, basically the run of the mill "High end" jewelry, why? Because being tasteless especially with vast amounts of money, like some pieces go up for like 10k and up is a huge red flag.
Taste in expensive and tasteless handbags - Think Kors, LV monogram, and I am sorry but Hermes is just overplayed at this point. Why? Spending 30k on a bag is crazy capitalism simping, we don't support mass consumerism in this house.
Dislike for animals/pets/wild critters - Why? It's pretty self explanatory, if you can't love every god given creature on this planet to some point, then you are not my cup of tea. Yes even the german cockroaches deserve some love, they are not guilty that we invaded vast spaces of land and they got somehow mixed up in the bunch.

Purple_Cruncher_123 · 2023-06-17T20:01:48+00:00

Obsession with astrology as a guiding source in life matters. Not just casual interest, but like actively using it to ‘understand’ people, saying you wouldn’t get along with someone because your signs are incompatible, etc.

I’ll also add that the MBTI is a similar offender, especially since personality testing was part of my training background. As far as popularity goes, I can’t deny how effective it has captured the zeitgeist of people looking for secular guidance. But it’s basically a secular equivalent of astrology signs from a rigor standpoint. The MBTI is extremely poorly regarded among actual practitioners.

TooBusySaltMining · 2023-06-17T19:40:54+00:00

Horse girls

Get_Cheersed · 2023-06-18T06:45:55+00:00

Not being open to other peoples perspectives on life / never thinks they are in the wrong.

Treating less fortunate individuals poorly or treating service staff poorly.

Not being able to communicate about real life issues and events. Social media and reality TV should not be the baseline of your knowledge.

Not having basic adult life skills. Every adult should be able to cook, clean up after yourself and look after the space around you. ( yes I am a male big surprise 😂 I do have some slight OCD about my space being clean though 😂 )

VastlyVainVanity · 2023-06-17T23:32:10+00:00

Chameleon. My ex was like that. Basically, women who adapt themselves to the guy they're currently dating or trying to date. Will act like a pure maiden if the guy has conservative values, and will act like a 100+ body count slut if the guy likes that.
Thinks she can choose what should matter to me, in terms of personal values. Particularly bad if she lies about something she knows I care about. Like women who are all like "Why do you care about body count?? It's irrelevant! yada yada yada". Very big red flag IMO, makes me feel like she could just cheat on me and take it to her grave because "I've forgiven myself, it doesn't matter, he doesn't have to know", lol.
"Not like other girls" types. Women who shit on other women in order to present themselves as a better choice. Some people call them pick-mes, but I dislike the term. But yeah, big red flag.
Women who can't be alone. Like someone who can't stay single (with no FWB, ONSs etc) for more than a few months.
Women who think sex work is liberating or something to be proud about.
Women who pretend to be stupid in order to be cute (and also to make the man feel smart). Very popular type in Japan AFAIK. I just find it retarded.
Rude towards men she's not interested in, and suddenly transforms into a sweet angel when talking to a guy she's interested in.

I could probably keep going on, but that's way more than enough.

Zabadoodude · 2023-06-17T17:31:25+00:00

If she hasn't maintained any close, long lasting relationships in her life.

After_Instruction876 · 2023-06-17T19:38:53+00:00

She gives a vague reason (e.g. we grew apart) as to why her and her ex broke up. Especially if she can’t elaborate or give you concrete reasons.
never admits her own wrongdoing or part in something. Is a constant victim
holds her grievances in until later or it’s too late
doesn’t get along with family
breaks small promises and doesn’t apologise.

HazyMemory7 · 2023-06-17T20:46:31+00:00

Entitlement, playing mind games, viewing anything relationship wise through a transactional lens, general dislike/hatred of men, has no passions/life of her own

killjumpsteady · 2023-06-18T07:46:57+00:00

Women who want to be taken care of because “its a mans job” im looking for a girlfriend not to adopt a child.

Workaholiconew · 2023-06-18T02:33:50+00:00

Being overall uncompromising or uncooperative with me or other people.

A woman who is uncompromising with friends and go "you are useless. I said 7 sharp!" Or who is uncooperative like boasting that they backstabbed their old coworker for a job... are very big red frags.

YveisGrey · 2023-06-18T06:12:09+00:00

I think being extremely pro choice is a red flag. I don’t mean like she’s just generally pro-choice. I mean extreme on the issue like she thinks it should be legal until the baby’s crowning.

Like it’s fine to be generally pro choice (shit happens) but most pro choice people still think abortion isn’t ideal and do think it’s reasonable to ban medically unnecessary elective ones after a certain point (usually around viability or the 3rd trimester).

Now the reason I say extreme pro choice position is a red flag is because it shows a lack of compassion for the weak and vulnerable. And appeals to recklessness and irresponsibility. A woman who is that extreme on the issue probably thinks women can’t do any wrong.

Also having multiple elective abortions—I don’t really see how one would know that about a woman but if they found that out HUGE red flag. First of all if you’re getting a whole bunch of them you’re just irresponsible because BC is very effective and accessible yes shit happens but when it does it should compel you to be more careful in the future if it doesn’t that says something about your character. I actually knew a woman like this who had multiple and let me tell you she was just all around crazy like cuckoo for Cocoa puffs. She was also abusive physically and mentally, vindictive I mean the works, slashing tires stalking it was wild.

MarBitt · 2023-06-17T20:53:26+00:00

She uses sexual weapons to gain money and benefits.
She compromises her moral principles too easily.
She prefers comfort over the possibility of growth too often.

No-Passage5727 · 2023-06-17T20:04:53+00:00

-Overly materialistic.

-Overly obsessed with celebrities and drama. I’m talking about knowing like every single detail of these people’s lives.

-Ignorant of current politics and world events.

-No life plan. This really wasn’t a big deal when I was dating younger but now it’s a major red flag. Especially if you are at the age where you should at least have some direction or career goals in life (post college)

-Trumpers/Republicans

-No friends at all.

-Horrible conversationalist

-Obsessed with TikTok.

-No College degree

-White/Non-Black women who only date black men *this is race specific. I’m black, but these women tend to fetishize black men and have no actual interest in you as an actual person or want you to conform to what their idea of a “black man” is which is normally their favorite rapper or athlete

-Weird relationship with parents. At a certain age, if you are an adult and your parents are still controlling every detail of your life it’s a red flag.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2023-06-17T17:45:37+00:00

I had a girl ask me if I was cool, then snort a thumbnail of coke right in front of me on a dance floor. That was a pretty big red flag.

No-Assistant-2592 · 2023-06-17T19:01:07+00:00

Having a LIST. Not preferences, that's fine, but a LIST.

Letting her femininity get in the way of just being a person. Being feminine when it's inappropriate.

Having few male friends, or just having male acquaintances. The men in their lives aren't opening up to her or keep her at an emotional distance.

Annual_Anxiety_4457 · 2023-06-17T17:10:34+00:00

Women who have their life in perfect order and just that last armchair husband to match the carpet. I don’t want to be someone’s piece of furniture I want to build something together. Typically this is career oriented women with a need to control and micromanage.

BioNipple · 2023-06-18T02:16:46+00:00

Murican

timmyretmurking · 2023-06-18T18:24:14+00:00

I don't date any woman who:

-Mc'Donalds

-Charge they phone

-Twerk

-Be bisexual

-Eat hot chip

-Lie

wtknight · 2023-06-17T20:23:56+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Billsandasonom · 2023-06-17T19:37:43+00:00

If we're talking about long-term commitment rather than just ONS or short term FWB, any unnatural hair dye (eg blue, green, purple, pink), piercings beyond ear piercings, or tattoos. Not saying every woman who has any of these is going to be problematic. It's just, why take the risk? None of these probably qualify as unusual flags though.

RevolutionaryFig929 · 2023-06-17T18:02:07+00:00

After being stupid for on or two times, I will unmatch and ghost women now, that are to picky aboit the first date place. (disclaimer, I always pick expensive, save places, that are clean, good service, no difficult patrons or the like, and I ask if their are parts of the city she doesnt want or cant go to easily before I pick a place )

Its like you have to propose 3 to 4 places in a row, and it will not get better afterwards.

I will not put up with that shit anymore, especially as 90 % expect you to make the plan, and I will pay anyway.

ShortDiscount7262 · 2023-06-17T17:52:50+00:00

BPD

Dating criminals or psychopaths

Feminist beyond second wave

Tendency to get fat in relationships

No respect for my family or friends

Flirting with other guys

Low IQ

Wants to argue about everything

Low sex drive

Cold and bitchy personality

Virtue signaling

Use of hard drugs or a history of using hard drugs

Can’t keep female friends

User of Reddit

ceereality · 2023-06-17T19:17:31+00:00

If she has a high snapscore. Instant block.

AnonJetlag · 2023-06-17T17:33:02+00:00

Social media

M3taBuster · 2023-06-17T19:02:23+00:00

Other than the ones you listed, I'll add politically left/liberal, feminist, unnaturally colored hair, tattoos, and piercings (other than ears).

Happy_Nuclear_End · 2023-06-17T17:19:46+00:00

Unwillingness to start and keep a conversation or high use of the smartphone during the date, means that she's not interested on you and a better option is already on the table.

"I like travels, food and travelling", means she wants someone to pay her bills while she can spend her money on travels.

"Colored hair", means she's very likely to be more feminist than the average modern woman.

Fat, single mother or had abortion, lack of self control and responsibility.

Lack of paternal figure.

amber_day · 2023-06-17T19:09:33+00:00

[permanently deleted]

xItaliax · 2023-06-17T17:45:59+00:00

Covert narcissistic women.

babazuki · 2023-06-17T21:20:53+00:00

I've recently heard the theory that if a woman has an ex who initiated a breakup with her, she'll continue to be obsessed with him even in a new relationship. There were some reasons given such as women tend to chase men they think are better than them and the ex put it in her head that she's not good enough and he's her best option.

idk know about all that, but it fits my own observations anecdotally at least. A couple girls I dated did have that problem. They always tried getting back with the dude that dumped them and didn't care about other past relationships.

wtknight · 2023-06-17T22:07:03+00:00

American. I prefer women from other countries than my own.

sadIckleFeminazis · 2023-06-17T22:19:11+00:00

If she's a feminist. I'll walk out of the bar on our first date if she leaks that one.

I've done it before and I'll do it again.

Oh, and of course I'll leave her to get the bill. Cos you know, equality.

CapsuleCorpLogo · 2023-06-17T20:44:25+00:00

High body count, tons of male friends, goes clubbing every weekend, promiscuous friends.

To add on to that: Post on any femcel subreddit (TwoXChromsomes, Female Dating Strategy, etc.), drinks a lot of alcohol (women can’t hold their liquor and usually get loud and obnoxious when drunk and lose all sense of accountability for their actions) , has a bad relationship with her father and/or mother, nose ring (studs are fine, nose rings looks stupid af), tattoo sleeves on arms (too masculine), doesn’t paint nails (masculine), is friends with women who have cheated on their partner (will convince her to cheat too), smokes weed (lazy af and no life ambition),

And the biggest one that ALL MEN SHOULD LOOK OUT FOR: Her only desire in life is to be a mom.

.

EverVigilant1 · 2023-06-17T19:36:41+00:00

--pr0nstar makeup.

--fake lashes, fake nails.

--either very defensive about her N or very open about her N

--has ever been under the care of any kind of mental health specialist.

--Is more than 2 years older than I am

--has ever been diagnosed with any kind of mental/emotional disorder

--has ever been diagnosed with or treated for any kind of addiction

--has a nonexistent or poor relationship with her father

--raised by a single/divorced mother

--claims to be a feminist

--claims to have ever been in an "abusive" relationship with a man

--claims to have been "raped"

--works as an "entrepreneur" (usually as a nail tech, "doing hair", or "selling real estate")

--works in hospitality (flight attendant, hotel concierge, bartending/high end waitressing)

--works as a "nurse"

--large percentage of body altered with tattoos or piercings

--pierced nipples, navel, or genitals

King-SAMO · 2023-06-17T19:02:40+00:00

If someone shoe horns their vegan ism into the conversation, it will eventually become problematic.

if you eventually notice that someone is a vegan, then you should keep dating them bc they stand for their beliefs without imposing them; that’s a keeper right there.

Crushed_95 · 2023-06-17T23:01:24+00:00

If she consider her pets as humans. I love my dog but, he is just that. A dog.

Sad_Top1743 · 2023-06-17T19:09:14+00:00

Her travel destinations (Vegas and Miami for example)

If she’s close w her direct family or not. Distant/broken relationships w family, whether it’s her fault or there’s, is usually not a good sign if you want something that will last.

Tattoos

Social media activity. If there are thirst traps rest assured she craves male validation and that doesn’t go away when you’re in a relationship

Professional-Ant8445 · 2023-06-17T18:18:29+00:00

If a woman lives solo with a large, intact male dog (ie. Pitbull, Doberman, etc.)

Nope. Nope. Nope. 🤮

bad_nerves · 2023-06-17T19:10:59+00:00

red hair (if not her natural hair color)

Divine_Chariot · 2023-06-17T19:47:28+00:00

- "You're one of the good ones"

- Yells at me

- Tries to alienate me from my family

- Talks smack about my religion/eats beef

- Thinks me being supportive means being her punching bag

- Expects me to apologize

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Pilling_it · 2023-06-17T19:29:23+00:00

I don't really care about how much she make, but I care a lot about how much she manage.

There's no point in working to get a lot if that's going to be wasted.

AFuzzyMuffin · 2023-06-17T19:39:00+00:00

Can never be pragmatic for starters. If the ends don’t justify the means it means it’s gonna be an emotional rollercoaster constantly

Poddx · 2023-06-17T20:14:12+00:00

I asked my friend the other day if she has a lot of friends. She answered: "No, only you" as she poured me a cup of coffee.

itm4l2000 · 2023-06-17T21:42:13+00:00

Broke and in their 30s, masquerading as high value, low body count.

Several_Pressure7765 · 2023-06-17T22:27:11+00:00

Her health

Dunkman83 · 2023-06-17T23:59:36+00:00

takes a ton of selfies a day. cant keep a steady job

Dunkman83 · 2023-06-18T00:00:48+00:00

a woman with no female friends.

bizk55 · 2023-06-18T00:12:51+00:00

Using an illness to get attention

Lack of understanding of physical/emotional/personal boundaries

An inability to take on and even entertain another person's perspective when they disagree with it

Royal-Tip4585 · 2023-06-18T03:49:48+00:00

Tattoos. Astrology.

Treacle-Flimsy · 2023-06-18T06:45:51+00:00

If she can't be alone for extended period of time

Stunning_Thing4208 · 2023-06-18T06:55:07+00:00

I look at her family history, her upbringing, did she have an absent or abusive father, did she have a narcissistic mother, how does she treat her parents and siblings.

That's key.

YveisGrey · 2023-06-18T07:00:42+00:00

If a woman doesn’t have female friends because they are “too much drama” that’s a red flag.

Not sure how it translates in relationships but such women are usually problematic hence why they can’t keep friends.

WilliamWyattD · 2023-06-18T08:13:36+00:00

Long nails she puts a lot of work into. Next.

Ikem32 · 2023-06-18T09:10:19+00:00

The way she talks. If it is „ghetto“, I‘m done.

That_guy_who_lifts · 2023-06-18T10:08:18+00:00

Highly active on social media.

QuenchlessGato · 2023-06-18T11:48:09+00:00

Travelling to places with a certain "reputation" when she was single. If a single guy told me that he went to Thailand I would be 50% sure that Thai hookers were at least one of the things he experienced there. Similarly, some places you also expect a woman to have hoed out there.

Fatwacker · 2023-06-18T16:34:18+00:00

Borderline personality disorder.

They make a game out of fucking up your family life and all your relationships.

The-lonely-lion · 2023-06-18T19:08:09+00:00

She doesn't love children or doesn't want children.
Plastic surgery(ass, boobs)
Makes out with women
Is a feminist

Aggrestis · 2023-06-18T20:28:54+00:00

Penis

LaloTwins · 2023-06-18T21:31:02+00:00

Astrology

LeftWingLich · 2023-06-18T23:22:57+00:00

Courage (the ability to act despite being afraid) or bravery (the lack of fear entirely).

prairieboy1996 · 2023-06-19T03:35:05+00:00

If she does not have/use snapchat or instagram...Would be indicative that she has little to no friends, ideally, would want her to have more followers than me on instagram (over 620)

RedBullfrog · 2023-06-19T08:35:49+00:00

No hobbies. If she has no life outside work, kids and house, she will eventually treat you as a part of a project.

Coolio_Street_Racer · 2023-06-19T13:09:40+00:00

If she doesn’t post her father on fathers day

DerayRevan · 2023-06-17T17:03:53+00:00

For me:

Red NAILS and lipstick

Not dressing up feminine most of the time

Coloured hair

Being Fat/ugly

bad_nerves · 2023-06-17T17:52:00+00:00

[permanently deleted]

SorryEm · 2023-06-17T21:57:57+00:00

Does it matter? It's not like I'm having a line of women which want to talk with me. Those basic obvious stuff you put in the post are my answers.

social_mule · 2023-06-17T23:38:04+00:00

Never wears dresses
Doesn't carry a purse
Changes phone numbers frequently
- Random text message: It's Kim, I had to change my phone number.
- 6-18 months later: Hey, it's Kim. I had to change my number again.
Knows who Maureen Dowd is
Owns an emotional support animal

fruitlessideas · 2023-06-18T04:27:25+00:00

If she changes her hair every few weeks or so.

If she can’t commit to a hairstyle, she can’t commit to you.

Title	Any unusual flags/traits you look out for in women?
Author	amber_day
Upvotes	74
Comments	346
Date	June 17, 2023 5:00 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/14bw161/any_unusual_flagstraits_you_look_out_for_in_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/any-unusual-flagstraits-you-look-out-for-in-women.1222839 https://theredarchive.com/post/1222839

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