Do women use the adjectives "creepy" "weirdo" "stalker" etc., as synonymous of "unattractive"?

mvnnyvevwofrb · 2023-10-07T17:09:30+00:00

In fairness, I don't think the women that call some "creepy" or "weird" are the same women that would write letters to Ted Bundy.

This-Experience6419 · 2023-10-07T16:19:32+00:00

It’s probably crazy ass chicks that sent the letters. Normal people do find murderers ‘weird’.

Ffs man come to reality

TommyBarcelona · 2023-10-07T18:16:36+00:00

Im relatively good looking but theyve called me weird at work because not as sociable at others, and am good with excel....

macone235 · 2023-10-07T16:29:51+00:00

Yes, it's been scientifically proven in studies. That doesn't mean that attractive people can't be considered creepy as well, but they are given a much longer leash.

metasekvoia · 2023-10-07T17:51:38+00:00

No. Some unattractive men are really smooth and likable. Creepy and weird is more like unsafe because unpredictable because mentally unwell or extremely socially incompetent.

LifeIsAVeryBadJoke · 2023-10-07T16:21:00+00:00

Women are attracted to strength. The problem with that is that it's sort of a runaway of evolutionary design. Meaning that "strength" has basically a ceiling-less interpretation to people who value such a thing.

TotalTravesty · 2023-10-07T16:22:30+00:00

Famous people have exposure to all different corners of society. And famous murderers are going to have exposure to the parts of society who are mentally unwell or have some kind of extreme murder fetish.

Do…do you want to attract the type of girl who likes serial killers?

Why does it have less to do with looks than you think? Because Jack Black also has similar exposure to millions of women. Being famous didn’t make him more attractive, but it did reveal and amplify the type of woman who is attracted to his…whole deal. And if you want to play sadsack and act like my big takeaway is “just be famous, bro,” well, you’re a little right. Or you could just put yourself in front of more women and find the kind who thinks your creepiness is hot.

PSA because the people on this sub need it: don’t murder people as a way to get laid.

Throwawayfor_advicee · 2023-10-07T17:31:05+00:00

Most women do perceive them as creepy losers, unfortunately some romanticize them and that’s just so fucking insane to the majority of us that it gets sensationalized and turned into news articles, etc.

When women were making TikTok’s about how hot Ted Bundy was the comments were full of other women telling the OP it was gross to romanticize a man who hated, SA’d & murdered women.

To answer your question in the title- no.

If I say someone’s being creepy I mean you’ve crossed the line of things that someone can reasonably expect you not to do for their comfort. For example staring at me, usually staring at my ass/tits, walking close behind me for a long period of time, if someone drives past and rubber necks to stare at me, etc.

Weirdo I rarely use as a negative & more so as a positive, but I appreciate things not being normal. When using it in a negative way I generally mean something rude but also unusual. Example was when someone working at a gas station tried to ask me how much longer till I was done in the bathroom and told me to hurry up, I’d been in there for under five minutes.

If I call someone a stalker I mean you’ve crossed the boundaries we should just expect any person to have in place for safety reasons. For example trying to follow me to my home/work/car, seeing me once in public and then finding all of my social media, searching for my personal information like phone number or address online, etc.

TechnicalMiddle8205 · 2023-10-07T18:35:46+00:00

I am a man, and Im quite certain that men are not that better in this one case. For example, check out Yuka Takaoka; A pretty japanese yandere woman who had a crush on a man. This woman tried to kill this man stabbing him several times on his stomach, with the intention of her killing herself after so that they both "could be together forever".

Apparently this woman were loved and many men even fantasized about being with her, she got many male fans (and female ones too I think) rooting for her.

Maybe this is what happens when a case is famous... even if the 0.01% of population is crazy, when everyone knows about it this 0.01% is still a pretty large number of people. Maybe Im wrong, but both men and women are way too permissive to others when they are pretty (and it is sad, tbh)

SecondEldenLord · 2023-10-07T19:43:36+00:00

It was the same for Richard Ramirez, which in my book was probably more gruesome than Ted Bundy mainly because he was harming children too. But richard ramirez was not short on fan girls either because he was this hot young latino guy. And yes, it is solely due to their looks, not their attitude or their crime. A guy who is fat, bald and short but does the same crimes like ted bundy will never receive love letters at all.

Now to be fair those women are psychos themselves for wanting such men, but in reality yes, women do find unattractive men creepy, being called that myself too and many other men like me as well. And the reason why women chase after bad boys is because they are hot and they are thrillign while good guys are just boring.

TimeConstraints · 2023-10-07T20:07:48+00:00

You are trying to draw lessons about women's general behavior by citing anecdotes from the extremes for both men and women.

The reason we know about guys like Bundy, Watts and Kohberber is because they were so abnormal.

Ted Bundy was remarkable because of his ability to exude warmth and charm as he was engaging a woman and planning her murder.

The reason we know about the women that wrote them love letters is because they were so abnormal.

They are interesting as behavioral freaks, but not useful for understanding general female and male behavior in the dating marketplace.

E.g., I'm inclined to think that all men have a little Chad inside them.
Given a change of circumstances (e.g. broken heart & glow-up), many reserved men will become promiscuous. For others their inner Chad is constrained by the reality of their capabilities, ethics or both.

However, very few of us have a little bit of Ted Bundy inside us. His behavior is repulsive to the vast majority of healthy men.

MorningFormal · 2023-10-07T20:10:36+00:00

They are considered creepy and weird by normal women. There are women who fetishize things that are deviant just like men do.

Some men do act creepy, though I had a young man approach me in the store and literally just said, "Hello, how are you doing?" To me, I said."I'm good, thanks," and he spoke to my chest and never looked up to my face, then walked away. I was wearing normal clothes, nothing in any way revealing, nor do I have huge assets. I'm just an average person. When people act like this, it's kinda weird, I'm a person. In his defense, he was a young person, maybe just being polite, but it's uncomfortable for someone to stare at your chest and talk to you and never look at your face.

I had another man approach me a few years ago in the grocery store who told me they liked my sandles. I was said, "Thank you." Because it was odd, and I dont really talk to strangers, but it seemed like a nice compliment if it stopped there. That would have been fine. Then he said he liked my feet. I was shocked and said umm okay and walked away. Then, as I shopped, I saw him watching me down the rows as I was shopping. That is creepy. I got out of there because it was intrusive.

Some people just want to be left alone in public. I feel that way.

On the other hand, I was leaving a gas station the other day, and an older man (maybe my mom's and dad's age) held the door for me as I was leaving. I said thank you. He said your welcome beautiful. I said "aww thank you." That was just a passing compliment and didn't come off as creepy. He was an older person and just seemed nice and also it was a situation we're two people are walking in different directions, the person was holding the door as I was carrying things, a kind gesture and didn't make me feel cornered but instead just seemed like someone being nice.

So sometimes men say off-hand things or make you feel cornered or treat you like a non person. That is creepy. A passing compliment is alright as long as you're not doing it in an intrusive way or making someone feel watched or cornered. That's what I think.

Veloci-Tractor · 2023-10-07T16:36:42+00:00

multiple people have described meeting with ted bundy and him being very creepy

no, those words are used to their definition.

badgersonice · 2023-10-07T22:58:15+00:00

It's not uncommon for men convicted of heinous murders and serving time in jail to receive love letters from women.

Women who write love letters to serial killers are very very messed up and likely terrible people themselves.

Doesn’t you lamenting that those women won’t date you make you just like them? Like, you are really genuinely sad that the kind of psycho woman who likes real life actual murder isn’t hoping to marry you and be the mother of your children?

Why are you sad that psycho women aren’t in your life and hitting you up for a relationship? Seriously, you wishing you could date bad women who are bad at life… is not so different from them writing letters to murderers.

Because it looks like you’re just like them: both of you want to date the actual worst people.

PrecisionHat · 2023-10-07T16:31:37+00:00

Well, in the cases of those love letter to murderers, those women are suffering in some way, probably mental illness. Not behaviour that is to be emulated.

For the most part, the answer to the question in your title is, "sometimes". I don't think it's deniable that some women will tolerate behaviours more when they are from men who they find really attractive. To be fair, men do this as well; have you ever heard of the "hot/crazy" scale?

There are plenty of women, however, who will not tolerate creepiness from anyone, no matter what they look like.

I do think the women who call unattractive men creepy, even when they aren't being that way, are very immature. But I don't think it's this pervasive thing, like some people make it out to be.

capsaicinintheeyes · 2023-10-07T18:45:28+00:00

"Just become a murderer bro"

Maybe that will be the next thing after Blackpill

"Have you taken the murderpill bro"

TSquaredRecovers · 2023-10-07T17:12:34+00:00

Or, and here me out, the type of women who are enthralled by serial killers and other violent criminals are a very small minority who are likely extremely mentally unstable.

To the vast majority of women, these men are 100% flat-out disturbing and unappealing in every way possible.

FaradayBurka · 2023-10-07T16:18:50+00:00

Plenty of women thought Bryan Kohberger was a creep. He acted inappropriately and was disciplined for it well before the murders.

candikanez · 2023-10-07T18:09:11+00:00

Why aren't these criminals perceived as 'creepy,' 'weird,' or 'losers' by women?

They are.

On the contrary, why are they desired and respected?

They're not.

Just because a small subset of women are attracted to them, does not make it the norm. There are women with fucked up psyches just like there are men with fucked up psyches. The majority still find them repulsive.

96tillinfinity_ · 2023-10-07T16:59:44+00:00

Not all women but creepy is 1000% synonymous with unattractive for men and it protects women from coming off as shallow which they subconsciously know

If a woman calls a man creepy, there is a chance the guy is actually a creep but there is a huge chance the guy is just not good looking

Its easier for a girl to get away with calling a strange man creepy than ugly

Safinated · 2023-10-07T16:30:45+00:00

The ability and willingness to be violent and destructive — and also live with the consequences —- is a form of status. As is the notoriety resulting from this ability

Now, is it attractive to all women? Or women that most men would find ideal as partners?

You’ll have to answer that for yourself

Ohmaygahh · 2023-10-07T17:06:41+00:00

I know what you're trying to say. Recently saw a post on popular about a 23 year old female teacher get convicted for raping a 13 year old boy. Keep in mind that she was married with two children. The teacher is attractive. There is no way in hell a 13 year old has any masculine adult features, game, status, financial power, emotional or mental power to project to attract. It makes no sense.

2023-10-07T17:23:38+00:00

If a woman finds a guy creepy then I think It's safe to say she also finds him unattractive by default. I also think the amount of women who are interested in serial killers is a minority.

No_Yogurt_4602 · 2023-10-07T19:30:27+00:00

Kinda just seems like you're conflating what is, tbh, an extremely small subculture of serial killer fetishists with literally all women.

BKEnjoyerV2 · 2023-10-07T23:29:59+00:00

I wouldn’t say it’s synonymous with unattractive, more like undesirable or socially stunted/challenged (I have firsthand experience with the latter)

xTakki27 · 2023-10-07T16:48:55+00:00

Of course they do...

And as "too poor/ugly/short/etc. to approach me"

neinhaltchad · 2023-10-07T20:52:43+00:00

I’d say that it boils down to this:

It’s very easy to be seen as creepy as an average to below man.

It’s very hard (but not impossible) to be seen as creepy as an attractive man.

A Chad would basically have to try to be creepy, whereas an average man just average man can just be shooting his shot.

baiser_vole · 2023-10-07T16:21:35+00:00

No. I actually had a stalker that the police dealt with for me. Stalkers are who stalk.

Electronic_West_1831 · 2023-10-07T16:40:38+00:00

Yes - a conventionally handsome man can get away with all sorts of horrible crimes

Anxious_Adult123 · 2023-10-07T16:29:30+00:00

You are right and wrong with respect to this post.

Serial killers and dangerous men get love letters from women who are attracted to such people. It's some kind of sexual paraphilia. Most woman, or for that matter, most people find them dangerous and creepy.

But in general, in majority of real life scenario, the difference between a creep and romantic admirer is weather they are perceived as handsome or not.

learn2earn89 · 2023-10-07T18:28:56+00:00

I have called attractive guys creepy. Not to their face though lol Actually, most of the weirdos I’ve known have been kinda attractive.

nateo200 · 2023-10-07T17:16:02+00:00

I always get the heebee jeebeez from chicks that find me attractive without knowing me or worse find me attractive and want to make me out as some “bad boy”. It’s cute and fun at first but some girls really prefer dark triad traits in an unsettling way.

LotBuilder · 2023-10-07T17:26:36+00:00

Some mentally unhealthy women are attracted to creepy and weird. If you combine creepy and weird with dangerous and conventionally attractive… that segment of the female population gets very excited.

But yes, for most normal girls creepy and weird means unattractive or socially awkward. Attractive guys can also be creepy, but they have to try much harder. There’s a very good looking guy in my area and in my age range that hits up all the women online, but he creeps them out with 5 paragraph mushy text messages after their first coffee date.

Osagtraf · 2023-10-07T17:34:50+00:00

Lol they don't consciously do it, but unconsciously, definitely.

basedmama21 · 2023-10-07T17:45:15+00:00

Absolutely not. Attractive men are without a doubt VERY capable of being creepy, weird, stalkers. I had a gorgeous ex who used to threaten to track my phone and hunt me down. Granted, he only had to do this twice before I blocked him and never spoke to him again. He’s objectively attractive. Not just subjectively (I know the difference very well)

Crazy comes in all forms. Just like hot women can be off putting and weird.

begayallday · 2023-10-07T17:54:33+00:00

Charles Manson had a lot of women writing letters to him too, and he was 5’2” with crazy eyes.

Cethlinnstooth · 2023-10-07T19:07:56+00:00

Obviously it isn't a synonym because we find men being creepy, being weirdos and being stalkers even on Reddit, where we can't see what they look like.

A miniscule percentage of women fantasize about serial killers and a further miniscule percentage of that miniscule percentage would be willing to do something more than fantasize. It's probably a smaller number than the number of people who fantasize about vomiting as a sexual act. Just to put this in perspective.

darkredpintobeans · 2023-10-07T19:34:02+00:00

The only girl I met irl who had a crush on serial killers also had a history of traumatic abuse, so it makes sense for her to subconsciously repeat the cycle by being attracted to predators.

HydrazineHawk · 2023-10-07T20:59:27+00:00

It’s more about being socially atypical more than anything…

women evolved to be very perceptive of social cues and have a good understand of whats normal or not. Deviating from social norms is a good indicator of a man who is either dangerous or at the very least likely to be low on the social totem pole

No_Shop1166 · 2023-10-07T21:09:20+00:00

Nah attractive men can be weird and creepy

Morrigan2020 · 2023-10-07T22:23:49+00:00

Women who are into serial killer romantically are mentally ill. This post makes as much sense as if I said men like cutting their penis off just because the guys on the penectomy sub seem into it.

That said, while creepy is not synonymous with ugly, I think hot guys absolutely can get away with more “creepy” (inappropriate, pushy, or lecherous) behavior with a lot more women than ugly men can. It’s the halo effect. We are all (men and women) positively inclined towards attractive people, and neutral at best to unattractive people. All behavior gets judged through the lens of the person on the receiving end of it; it’s not an objective thing where the same behavior produces the same reaction from others all the time regardless of the people involved. Unfortunate for those who are less attractive, and I do think it’s a lot easier to have innocent comments misinterpreted if you’re talking to someone who is already judging you negatively.

That said, even an attractive guy can tip over into creepy territory, so it’s not freedom to do whatever you want. The creepier you get, the fewer women will decide it’s worth interacting with you.

Same deal can be observed if we flip the genders. Really hot women can get away with being bitchy/crazy/lame in bed/etc. Her undesirable behaviors are also being weighed against how much she makes the lower bits tingle.

This is like Human 101.

Comfortable-Dare-307 · 2023-10-07T16:30:33+00:00

If you're good-looking, tall, rich, and drive something expensive, approaching a woman isn't considered creepy or weird. It's only when you don't look good, aren't rich, and are short that it's creepy. It doesn't matter how respectful and nice you are.

JadeGrapes · 2023-10-07T18:41:58+00:00

No.

Creepy is not synonymous with ugly.

It usually means the guy does behavior that makes me feel like I'm a PREY ANIMAL and I am being hunted. That includes things such as waiting or watching for me in unexpected circumstance;

coming to your workplace several times
watching you intently from a distance
waiting outside the bathroom to talk to you
waiting until everyone else has left to approach
cornering you in a room or cubicle
following you out to your car
Driving past your house
Asking others about you

Anything that a hunter or stalker might do.

It doesn't matter how attractive the guy is... I literally do NOT notice how handsome or ugly the person is...

It's like being startled by a bear, I'm not checking to see if the thing is a circus bear, a tame bear, normal bear, or a rabid bear - it's a fucking bear - get safe is the overriding feeling.

Because the "spidey sense" of feeling someone locked on me like a target, as though I'm not a person to them... is unsettling enough that my defense override any question of "is there any utility to this person in my life?"

Women can't be shopping for sausage when the "browsing" instinct is being occupied by the "lookout" alert.

The same way a guy doesn't want to go to the shitty part of town to shop for luxury goods... you are too nervous about being robbed to shop.

The people writing to serial murderers, are more focused on the status... like this guy is a drug kingpin sort of thing, they would not be into the guy if he was just a bank teller etc.

Theaceae_Ericales · 2023-10-07T16:35:24+00:00

No.

A behaviour is creepy, not a look alone.

"Weirdo" could be only by looks if it's too far from the norm, but not necessarily unnatractive.

Stalker is someone stalking IRL or on social media, so not synonymous of unattractive.

And finally, those type of women are themselves unhinged and the equivalent of guys chasing chicks with BPD/hysteria/whatever mental illness that makes them "hot" for men for some reason, and apparently good at sex (then they will complain their life with those girls are a living hell and she is abusive or extremely annoying).

Men loves psycho in TV/anime too, AND IRL.

Everyone should remember to just not stick your dick in crazy or let a crazy stick his dick in you and everyone would be better of this way.

MacaronFinancial · 2023-10-07T16:59:24+00:00

The creepy thing is sort of like an invisible fence that men learn to respect like an elephant tied to a pole by a flimsy piece of string that the elephant could easily tear off but is conditioned not to do that.

When girls reach puberty they become aware of boys' interest in them and they have to fumble and come up with some kind of tools to protect their privacy and dignity and calling boys perverts and creeps is a strategy that boys raised in polite society will usually react to by withdrawing...often with fake guilt weighing heavily on their shoulders. "Oh you like snuggles? Pervert!" Women cannot just lift men overhead and throw them away so they developed this shaming tactic as psychological self-defense to keep men under control. Obviously it does not work with men who are REAL creeps and perverts; they are either going to have their way with the women or succumb to physical violence in the form of self-defense.

At some point as a guy you need to realize that the function of the pervert shaming is not to destroy you as much as to maintain distance so you should not take it personally and most importantly not as a reflection of your character or worth. Unfortunately a lot of guys go through a phase where they perceive all women as having the same standing as their mom did when they were children; everyone has memories of being disciplined and the shaming tactic re-activates the same memories of shame we acquired as children when we did something wrong. Hopefully we were not victims of abusive and arbitrary scolding but regardless we are still conditioned to respond to disgust and anger as evidence of us having done something wrong.

No-Resource2745 · 2023-10-07T16:43:16+00:00

Nope - not in the slightest, although once it is revealed that somebody is creepy/weird/stalkerish, they do become unattractive at that point.

I remember one time I was flirting with a guy across the bar, tall, handsome, muscular, wearing a perfectly fitting suit. Well, he ended up coming over to me later, and he started talking about how successful he was and how he had to watch out for “gold diggers”, was very objectifying, clearly red-pilled, and yeah, overall really creepy behavior. I was instantly turned off and got the hell out of dodge.

Meanwhile, men who are not conventionally attractive, short, have beer bellies, etc. if they’ve got a good heart and are genuinely caring and don’t give off those vibes, they become more attractive to you over time. My partner, I didn’t find him attractive at first, but as we got closer, I’ve never had somebody turn me on just by being in their presence before in my life and he’s my Mr. Forever. He’s become physically attractive to me now, to an extreme extent and I can’t get enough of him.

SensitiveSugarr · 2023-10-07T16:55:23+00:00

Man kills a dozen people. Silence.

Women writes him a letter.

OP: why are women so weird?

operation-spot · 2023-10-07T16:29:04+00:00

Those words are used to describe anyone outside of the norm which is to say autistic which many of you are. The folks you’re talking about were able to fit into societal standards enough to not be seen as weird.

OpticalEpilepsy · 2023-10-07T16:24:48+00:00

If you ask women if Ted Bundy, a man that mudered his pregnant wife and two kids, and a man that murdered 4 people are attractive a very high percentage of them will say no but I'm sure you'll tell the women that say no that those women don't understand what they are attracted to

Do women like men that make the case for women being interested in serial killers? I'm sure you'll tell us that when they don't it's only when he is unattractive and if a woman disagrees its also because she doesn't understand what she's attracted to

Do women like men that think they can invalidate women when women claim they don't like serial killers or men that make the case for women being interested in serial killers?

Sorcha16 · 2023-10-07T17:35:27+00:00

Ted Bundy had numerous mentally ill female admirers

You missed a vital part of that sentence so I added it. Same as plenty of not right in the head men who simp for women who rape young men or how Jodie Ares had plenty a deranged fan

GridReXX · 2023-10-07T18:45:49+00:00

I’ve considered physically handsome guys as creepy for being violative, aggressive, and pushy.

So no “creepy,” “stalker,” and weirdo” are not synonymous with “unattractive.”

I’ve had a stalker. He was creepy, a weirdo, invasive, violative, and ultimately violent. He was finally arrested and sentenced to jail. How he “looked” did not factor into nor dictate why his actual actions toward myself and my roommate was considered stalking. His behavior did.

AutoModerator · 2023-10-07T16:14:48+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

resultsmatter1 · 2023-10-07T16:23:53+00:00

Creepy and weirdo? Yea. The same behaviors and words definitely result in different reactions based on your attractiveness to a given woman. If you’re good looking it’s cute and funny and if not you’re creepy.

Stalking is cut and dry.

lacuti3 · 2023-10-07T16:30:00+00:00

I think those girls are leading them on but the crazy ones might actually sleep with them if there’s a ‘spark’ (if the stars align). Getting fucked by a guy who killed someone is kinda hot I guess.

You don’t know, there might only be 3 women out of 100 who are willing to take it that far. I’m sure there’s a lot of letter exchanges that don’t go anywhere and the guys think it would.

You should never assume any one guy’s love/sex life is perfect. Girls generally don’t care that much about sex. “Generally” means: widespread; usually; commonly.

Mitago1 · 2023-10-07T16:48:13+00:00

Yes, but in my opinion everyone does this when it comes to unattractive people, the gender doesn't really matter in this case.

Some people have hybristophilia, especially when it comes to murderers or/and they are ''fixers'', these people believe that they are the only ones who can fix and help these certain criminals, murderers etc.

Aromatic_Ad5473 · 2023-10-07T18:44:11+00:00

Those criminals aren’t considered creepy because they were very good at what they did. If women found Ted Bundy creepy, he would have had a much harder time finding victims. Being charming was part of what made them successful predators.

It’s like when they interview the neighbours of killers “he was a quiet man, a good neighbour”

They have to be normal and likeable I’m their every day lives to avoid suspicion

yamb97 · 2023-10-07T19:28:22+00:00

creepy - causing an unpleasant feeling of fear or unease. "the creepy feelings one often gets in a strange house"

It literally can mean anything I don’t like.

TemporalAntiAssening · 2023-10-07T19:34:10+00:00

Old manager of mine was sending love letters/exchanging calls with a guy who killed a man at an ATM. The criminal infantilization/sympathy prevalent in society rn is sad and confusing.

NextAd1069 · 2023-10-07T20:13:19+00:00

Worth-Test-4246 · 2023-10-07T20:29:13+00:00

Smergmerg432 · 2023-10-07T20:45:57+00:00

…no. Thinking so leads to assuming being kind to someone means we think they’re attractive. That’s a danger in itself. Women can be nice to people they find unattractive.

hsa85 · 2023-10-07T21:20:31+00:00

This is such a bizarre question the way you’ve based it on a phenomenon that’s universally regarded as fucking weird.

It’s probably a combination of the murderers’ looks and the women’s mental illness.

I do think there’s something to an unattractive man being more likely to be called creepy than an attractive one. I think there’s a lower threshold for pushiness/persistence etc for a less attractive man. More attractive men I think can get away with more. But then there are those for whom the vibe is just totally off from the start regardless of their looks. Of those, the better looking ones might have some luck with certain types of women but probably not the majority.

But seriously the example you give is pathologically extreme behaviour and isn’t any kind of basis for your theory.

sweetbrown89 · 2023-10-07T23:05:49+00:00

Attraction & personality are different dimensions

I use “unattractive” for the physical

I use “creepy, weirdo, stalker” for the personal

Also, I keep seeing comments about men insisting that women still think attractiveness doesn’t matter…it does…I dunno why this keeps being brought up

FrolickingTiggers · 2023-10-07T23:07:38+00:00

Not that I know of.

capsaicinintheeyes · 2023-10-08T00:12:58+00:00

Do you mean in any sort of intentional way, or just as an especially noteworthy example of how people in general will often perceive attractive people more favorably and treat them better in little ways without necessarily realizing it?

Benowko1610 · 2023-10-08T00:26:03+00:00

I think in some contexts yea but that something almost everyone does. An advance from someone you deem unattractive as a guy is just unwarranted but you gotta remember that most women are physically incapable of defending themselves. So an unwanted advance could very quickly turn violent if they say something he doesn’t like. It’s like if shaq started making advances on you and your straight it’s not inherently wrong of him to do that but ofc your gonna see it in a negative Context when you remember he could fold you like a lawn chair if you don’t put up with it so when you end up just entertaining it you walk out of the situation with that dude in a bad light and you might think he was “creepy” and allot of times unattractive dudes just aren’t socially adept and say creepy ass stuff

xbthewizard2 · 2023-10-08T00:30:46+00:00

Xtal333 · 2023-10-08T00:43:06+00:00

Of course. Just look at how women are treating that one guy who dared to speak to a woman at a public library. Imagine if Henry Cavill asked if he could borrow a chair or something, do you genuinely think that they'll shame him as a creep?

orangecloverbud · 2023-10-08T01:46:47+00:00

There are behaviours that sometimes stick out. Think, a neurodivergent person trying to fit in with neurotypicals but the neurotypicals just sense that you're off. You think you're being normal by the typicals will notice it.

Creepy, weirdo is something not normal.

Stalker is obvious, he acts like a cockroach.

Women who write love letters to men in jail are another can of weirdos. Something to do with wanting a man who they know where he is at all times I think.

Spiritual-Agent7641 · 2023-10-08T02:00:04+00:00

I once matched with a guy who was very good-looking on a dating app. He turned out to be extremely low in self-esteem and was bordering on obsessive right out of the gate. This guy was just...I did not expect that behavior from someone as attractive as he was and it really freaked me out.

I reported him to the app within half a day and blocked him.

So I think it depends.

TigerRude4 · 2023-10-08T09:09:42+00:00

Not necessarily, but generally the more attractive you are, you can get away with saying creepier stuff, whereas ugly men don't even have to be creepy to be considered creepy.

KikiYuyu · 2023-10-08T09:31:31+00:00

You need to stop thinking that hybristophiliacs are representative of average women. They are mentally ill women not in their right minds.

Unattractiveness can be a factor, but it is not at all what defines creepy. Men also make excuses for attractive women who behave inappropriately. Most people are shallow like that, regardless of their sex.

BunnyFlopped · 2023-10-08T11:24:34+00:00

I call attractive men creepy losers all the time.

The reason why is because they are creepy losers.

I’m sure occasionally mean people will say mean things that are untrue. I don’t see why that means the word creepy is now synonymous with unattractive.

When I was younger I was bullied by being called carrot top. This was not a hidden code for me being ugly. It was because I had red hair as a little girl.

DeathToPinkDolphins · 2023-10-08T11:59:28+00:00

Attraction determines their energy

“That cute guy over there is checking me out”

“There’s a creepy guy over there who keeps staring at me”

WebBorn2622 · 2023-10-08T12:59:15+00:00

I would like to make two points:

In regards to the crushes on the killers: it is really fucked up that these women do fantasize about these men, but they are in no way the majority and are perceived as weird by most other women.

It’s also important to note that the women crushing on these men are not the victims of these crimes. Women tend to call men creepy when they enact a certain behavior towards themselves. The women crushing on these men have not had them be creepy towards themselves. They also know that they are in prison and therefore cannot actually hurt them. It becomes a fantasy, because it’s not possible for them to actually interact with the men so they don’t have to worry about their own safety.

As for the “only ugly men get called creepy” argument:

No. There are many attractive men who are seen as massive creeps. Being creepy is a behavior anyone is capable of.

Women usually call men creepy when they try to push against clear boundaries and force themselves on uninterested women. Example: “I said no to this guy earlier and then he tried to grab my boob. What a creep!”

However if the attention is wanted and consent is given it’s not seen as creepy. A guy trying to force me to kiss him is creepy and a guy I’m flirting with leaning in and giving me time to back off is not creepy.

The reason the guy called a creep is usually unattractive is because she’s less likely to be interested. Therefore he’s more likely to force himself onto her. Which labels him as a creep

enbaelien · 2023-10-08T13:38:22+00:00

I don't think you should compare the cringe chicks who want to fuck Bundy to all women lmao. These freaks are the Harley Quinns of society, most women aren't like that. At least not the ones you want to be dating lol.

Henry_Yopp · 2023-10-08T21:59:46+00:00

No, they use them as synonymous for socially awkward men.

jpla86 · 2023-10-08T22:01:49+00:00

Of course they do.

H8beingmale · 2023-10-08T23:42:07+00:00

i think for many women, it gives them an ego boost, pride boost

Title	Do women use the adjectives "creepy" "weirdo" "stalker" etc., as synonymous of "unattractive"?
Author	Illustrious-Slice767
Upvotes	127
Comments	215
Date	October 7, 2023 4:14 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/172a2kz/do_women_use_the_adjectives_creepy_weirdo_stalker/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-women-use-the-adjectives-creepy-weirdo-stalker.1234303 https://theredarchive.com/post/1234303

Comments