Women say that the bar low for men? Is this really true?

wtknight · 2022-05-20T01:54:27+00:00

I think that the bar is high for looks, charm, and ambition, but low for the male behaviors that annoy women once those higher bars are passed.

Immediate-Machine-18 · 2022-05-20T03:54:19+00:00

like everyone else has said, it's for behavior. Women (whether they want to admit it or are even aware) most often are attracted to men they consider more attractive than themselves. A telling sign for this is if that man is ofc physically attractive but also if he has OTHER women who want him. And because those types of men typically don't have to put much effort commitment-wise or personality-wise other than exuding confidence through looks/stature. Women will be shocked when you ARE one of those men and don't just want to fuck them, can hold long and deeper conversations, actually put the effort in, etc. If the bar was REALLY low they'd be getting with any average to a below-average looking guy that works a decent job, is nice, treats them nicely, but doesn't exude confidence.

Slyfer_Seven · 2022-05-20T01:43:01+00:00

Sort of. IF she finds you attractive the "bar" is stupid low from there. However hitting that attractive threshold can be quite a task depending on the chick...

D_D_BA4 · 2022-05-20T01:51:27+00:00

It's low for men she is attracted to.

LeadInfusedRedPill · 2022-05-20T02:18:39+00:00

The bars for physical attractiveness and moral behavior are two different things. One is high, the other is low.

cautionTomorrow555 · 2022-05-20T02:00:36+00:00

I will illustrate this with a story of a woman friend of mine who thought men were pigs and behaved badly and that the bar was low. He was unemployed and while she was at work got so day drunk he took a shit on her pillow before passing out. She still stayed with him for a couple months after this why? Because he hit her ridiculous looks threshold and she was a 3. If you meet womens impossible looks threshold you can basically do whatever you want personality and behavior wise which is why they think the bar is on the floor when in reality that bar is in another universe.

John_Oakman · 2022-05-20T02:45:29+00:00

The bar is low for the relevant men, concidencially those men are also socially above the rest of the male population.

Thus telling males to police their own through application of social pressure is doomed to failure as lions do not concern themselves with the pleading of sheep.

Puzzled_Carob_2742 · 2022-05-20T03:22:40+00:00

When they say " the bar is on the floor", what they mean is just be 6 ft, in shape, with a good career, with a highly active social life and several well-developed hobbies and then they will literally let you do anything you want to them. See how easy that is?

ReallyGoodPointLol · 2022-05-20T01:48:08+00:00

It’s low for 6’3” guys with sparkling blue eyes and cheekbones you could use to shape mahogany.

For the remainder, the invisibles, not so much.

Asatmaya · 2022-05-20T01:53:09+00:00

Only the men for whom the bar is low actually count to those women.

RatDontPanic · 2022-05-20T01:49:51+00:00

Women who think the bar is low for men are absolutely batshit insane and it is like a glowing sign over their heads that she will take you to the Upside-Down place if you date her. So don't.

Sad_Investigator1769 · 2022-05-20T02:54:09+00:00

Women who say the bar is low are lying.

An individual bar is low, but with a dozen requirements, there’s a dozen low bars to meet.

I have a low, non-Chad necessary bar and I still eliminate 99% of men.

ToHelp3897 · 2022-05-20T07:53:18+00:00

The bar is so low for men

Said the by straight women who have literally no experience trying to ask women out.

It's like men saying sexual harassment for women isn't that bad. How the fuck would a man know? Same thing applies here.

Just because you know some loser your friend dated doesn't mean that every loser has it that easy. Also that loser probably had something going for him if he was able to pull your friend (eg: funny, emotionally intelligent, mysterious, hot, whatever).

Boxisteph · 2022-05-20T09:23:43+00:00

Male here. In my experience the "be attractive" is silent always all the time.

Personality isn't generally attractive. If you look at someone who has a perfect personality, you won't be able to see his personality, you will see his shell, his body and that will be the thing that you will find attractive or not.

He can have a perfect personality and be ugly, too bad, that's the hand we have to deal with as brutal as it sounds.

He can have a perfect personality and be attractive, that's the perfect match women dream about.

He can have a bad personality and be attractive, well at least "I got to fuck a hot guy".

He can have a bad personality and be ugly, bro, at least get a good personality so we can hang out as bros more easily without fighting each other or causing trouble to each other. :)

LiftSushiDallas · 2022-05-20T02:33:34+00:00

Honestly it sounds like those women went after unavailable men or men out of their league who rejected them or only used them for sex, and then she saw those guys get into relationships with women she thinks aren't as high value as her, so she's claiming the bar is low for men.

I don't think the bar is low for men at all. I think women have the upper hand in the sexual marketplace with sex AND relationships.

H0rniCunt · 2022-05-20T04:08:37+00:00

They're just projecting.

Mr_Chad_Thunderpenis · 2022-05-20T03:10:25+00:00

The bar is indeed low... if you are hot and rich.

Specialist-Action-33 · 2022-05-20T07:40:54+00:00

When you have men who were extremely unsuccessful with women until they reach a certain age, women will lower the bar for them. Especially when there are single moms, women who see their biological clock is ticking, and those who try to avoid retroactive jealousy OCD. To them its like "Oh you're a good guy that women never paid attention to? Let me lower that bar for you even though I have so much baggage and personal issues of my own. You been looking for a relationship all your life right? Here you go!"

Yes thr bar is low, but who really benefits from it?

FancyComfortable4678 · 2022-05-20T03:27:29+00:00

The bar is really high for you or me. The bar is really low for Chris Hemsworth or Timothee Chalamet

PlayfulLawyer · 2022-05-20T02:39:05+00:00

If the bar is low for us to get into a relationship, the bar for women must be Underground, yeeesh

LMM-GT02 · 2022-05-20T09:00:40+00:00

I want an entire company of women to be airdropped over Shanghai in the next big war. Just women, no men.

Tutorial level difficulty unless you are well and truly hideous.

Some men die virgins and some women fuck dogs.

There is no fucking comparison.

daddysgotanew · 2022-05-20T10:16:11+00:00

The bar is low if you are extremely attractive and exceptionally tall. If you are 6'5" and top 5% in looks you can text women "yo come ova bish i got netflix lol" but if you try that as 5'11" 6/10 looking guy it's cops who show up.

You are only expected to be tall and good looking. Personality or behaviour or career or ambitions aren't that important, those things only matter if you aren't women's first choice.

TZ879 · 2022-05-20T06:12:45+00:00

Yes and no. The "bar" is very low for physically attractive men. However, the "bar" is high for average looking men and extremely high for men who are below average looking. Good looking people will always have more options and opportunities in relationships.

Valuable-Marzipan761 · 2022-05-20T09:37:21+00:00

I think the bar is high to get in a relationship, but low to stay in one. a lot of people are too hesitant to end a bad relationship.

2022-05-20T11:25:09+00:00

It does feel like there is no middle ground.

Tall, muscular, successful career? You’ll do well.

Absolute violent scumbag? You’ll do well.

Decent guy, ok job, respectful? Not so much.

gopher_glitz · 2022-05-20T06:28:09+00:00

FDS be like, "the bar is SO low for men, it's in hell"

Then be like under 6,6,6 need not apply...

PPDaccount76 · 2022-05-20T08:18:14+00:00

Some possible reasons why women may think that the bar is so low for men;

Apex fallacy - women literally don't even notice 80% of men in their realm of existence. (Women perceive 80% of men as below average in looks, looks only, and then there are a gazillion other requirements women would like a man to bring)

The men that women surround themselves with are all above average - women either indirectly allow only those kind of men to be in their surroundings or the women themselves go out of their way to make it possible for some men (usually HVM) to enter their lives in one way or the other.

As a result of the above reasons, even the lowest 20% of the remaining men (HVM) that women surround themselves with are good enough for them, but some of those men are perceived as poorer choices compared to the top 20% of the HVM they are surrounded with.

Basically, women are surrounded with HVM where some men obviously stand out even nore than other HVM, therefore, some of those HVM men are naturally going to appear as better or worse options in the eyes of women, even though all of them may actually be HVM.

The HVM men are automatically being categorized as either poor, average or good options just because that is what is normally available to them. They just don't realize it.

HazyMemory7 · 2022-05-20T03:58:57+00:00

2 ways to look at it:

The average man is overweight and makes ~40-50k in the US. Many men today are complacent and lazy, turning to porn and video games to replace genuine human interaction. So being fit, driven, and making more than that can put you above average.
Modern day women have delusional standards and hypergamy is an inherent biological characteristic. The delusion is truly incredible. They are all competing for "high value men". Even obese 30+ single mothers still want a tall, handsome, financially successful man who's never been married or had kids, and perhaps more shocking than that is that they they think they actually deserve one. The fundamental premise behind fds for example is a collection of women who simply aren't good enough options to get the guys they want to date them. Thus average men and below struggle tremendously to date and the looks threshold that you have to pass is quite high.

jamesbwbevis · 2022-05-20T10:44:09+00:00

They like saying that but reality is they still ignore most guys

2022-05-20T12:37:05+00:00

Women break rules for alphas and make rules for betas.

That is to say: if she finds that guy hot and wants to f*** his brains out she's going to break all the rules to be with him.

If there's a guy that she might consider there are going to be tests and obstacles that he must overcome to even have a chance.

And if she wouldn't consider the guy attractive at all, look out, she's gonna be calling the cops. Well, if he's not extremely gross, she might exploit him for resources. But in the end, if he withdraws his resources/utility, she's going to be really mad because that feels like rejection to her. Rejection from a male she sees as below her is like an act of war.

Mark_Freed · 2022-05-20T04:35:53+00:00

Nowadays women don't need men. They have jobs, they have friends, they don't define their identity based on kids, relationship, etc. They have career, hobbies etc.

Being alone isn't necessarily that bad or lonely during her 20s and 30s so they don't feel that intense pressure to find someone or anyone so the bar is high.

There is also the added risk of picking a bad person. Once you give your heart to someone it's harder to cut ties. You find yourself trying to forgive them. So with the rise ideologies like trp, fuckbois turning girls into forever girlfriends, etc women are also wary.

They raise their standards in order to justify the risk. If they are going to get their heart broken anyway, might as well take chances with someone that makes them giddy.

chalkandapples · 2022-05-20T01:55:58+00:00

In my experience, I don't think it's very easy for men to get into a relationship. If anything I feel like on average men are bad at boundaries and is likely to go out with whoever asks them out or chase them. But that's bad, because he might not truly like her and that creates problems down the road.

2022-05-20T05:38:48+00:00

Easy to say from someone who doesn't have to live their experience. Women are oblivious to the male experience.

alotmorealots · 2022-05-20T05:42:05+00:00

The bar in question is usually the "long term relationship"-worthy bar and not the "one night stand/FWB"-worthy bar.

The former is usually measured in things like:

Gainful employment
Self-care
Home-care
Emotional and social self-maintenance
Financial and time management
Future planning and future proofing, including insurance, 401ks etc

For properly self-sufficient women, they take all these things for granted as they do them all without too much thought. Thus, having your shit sorted is the bar being on the floor.

Plenty of men meet many of these requirements, but not all of them. I'm sure many men here easily pass all of these requirements but still have problems getting laid, but that's a different sort of bar to clear, as outlined by other commenters.

LarryLooxmax · 2022-05-20T02:57:08+00:00

women are very caring/emotions focused by nature and through female gender specific training, if you compare typical male behavior to this, its kind of... lacking. men kind of slam their way through life like an iron war axe not caring about much.

1000s of years of gender wisdom taught women to not expect more from men because duh, the XY chromosome imbued testosterone addled hunter-killer specifically programmed to fight sabertooths and mastodons doesnt have a lot of time to care about things like dishes being washed right or remembering anniversaries.

but then feminism came along and was like "men and women CAN be alike guys!!! we were equal all along!!!" and a bunch of enlightenment era nerds actually believed it, and ensured the rest of western culture went along for the ride.

thats why everyone today is basically retarded when it comes to gender relations and doing constant surprised pikachu when the opposite sex does opposite sex things

briiiana1122 · 2022-05-20T04:06:32+00:00

A lot of women have been in relationships with men who gave up on putting any effort into the relationship once they were in them. They expect a maid, cook, and therapist but didn’t offer the same, or ignored them and played video games all the time or whatever else. Then people bitch about these relationships because the fall prey to the sunk cost fallacy and think they need to stay in them because they are in them.

MisogenesUSA · 2022-05-20T17:31:57+00:00

Female post-nut clarity. Men experience it with porn. Women experience it with men they let fuck that they really shouldn’t have

Catesa · 2022-05-20T10:09:55+00:00

I think that bar is in hell for both genders.

Males will put up with abusive, out of control women as long as she gives fertility signals and allows him to play hero, she doesn't even have to be objectively pretty.

Females will put up with horrible, horrible behavior as long as you are providing something she lacks. She can brainwash herself into "loving" anyone until the cognitive dissonance gets too much. Mostly by introducing someone who is still loathsome, but is still a better option or getting into such abusive situations that she is forced to confront reality.

People are mostly annoying, messy, have psychological issues, justify their bad behavior, want to do the bare minimum and what else.

Mature men and women will take accountability for themselves and won't put up with someone who does not. And will make sure that their needs are met and won't put up with someone who doesn't get their own needs met.

Delusional people will try making sure that all their wants are cattered to. And then complain about other people not putting up with it.

Comprehensive_Bed314 · 2022-05-20T05:30:51+00:00

I've set the bar really high for a potential boyfriend. I'm a kid at heart. I'm adventurous, imaginative, creative, and full of wonder. I'm also really, REALLY stubborn.

humdf · 2022-05-20T06:28:39+00:00

projection. pure projection.

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-05-20T02:42:13+00:00

Do you really expect unsuccessful women to say "I'm a loser female who can't attract a quality guy"? This is as likely as any of the male whiners here saying "It's my fault I can't get women interested in me".

mandoa_sky · 2022-05-20T02:00:23+00:00

judging by the stuff on r/JustNoSO you'd definitely think so.

BeautifulTomatillo · 2022-05-20T03:01:24+00:00

Reasons why a lot of women think the bar for men is low - a lot of men don’t have great hygiene - a lot of men live in messy squalid conditions and expect their gf to clean for them - men don’t know who to dress themselves / take care of their appearance - many men often lead with sexually explicit comments / expect sex as soon as possible - general sexism / being dismissive of womens interests - negging / body shaming - not having any pictures of themselves / no social media presence & using terrible pictures on dating apps - many men can’t take “no” for an answer and get angry or spiteful when rejected - ignoring sexual boundaries, being sexually aggressive, not waiting for enthusiastic consent - cheating or unfaithfulness - lying in order to have sex with a women - many men are scared to be ‘pursuers’ aka being upfront about asking out women not ambivalent - victim complex, blaming women for their personal issues - racism or homophobia - not paying for dates - not being able to carry a conversation

So if you are able to avoid these things you will be looked at more favourably and women will be impressed. However that’s a “low bar” to reach. Hope I explained that properly

Urbanwitch666 · 2022-05-20T03:31:53+00:00

I kind of get it.

Like, I date both genders and women give better presents on the whole, and women are often more giving in bed, women are better at making cute romantic plans...

I love my partner and I do make a huge fuss when he gives a thoughtful gift or makes me dinner or remembers to help with house work 😂 Whereas my girlfriend those are just standards.

But in reality I think it's just a meme and actually most women I know have high expectations. Tbh I think high expectations are good, why is it bad to not want a man who is attractive, has a good job, etc? Those are just obviously good things. Maturity is attractive.

Katatonicsnake · 2022-05-20T16:46:55+00:00

Most women I know would want a relationship with a man who:

-has good social and emotional skills -is fairly liberal -has a decent job (and is preferably educated)

Somehow finding men like that is very difficult. And since most women already have friends who check those boxes, they are used to having them, and settling for a man who lacks those is difficult. In my opinion, those are fairly low requirements, but my husband and I had this conversation yesterday, and couldn’t come up with many men who have all of those qualities. And the ones who came up were all already taken at a fairly young age (17-21).

So for the majority of women, if they want a relationship, they’ll have to lower their bar, and it’s going to be pretty low in their eyes. For men, it might not seem like that , because again, most men lack at least some of those qualities. Their point of reference is different, because based on my experience, men don’t necessarily value things like emotional skills in their friends. So it’s a matter of an opinion, and what you’re used to.

ToHelp3897 · 2022-05-20T03:39:56+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Vohsrek · 2022-05-20T17:58:41+00:00

What they mean by “the bar is low” is often times emotional labour. You often see this type of comment on videos of boyfriends bringing flowers, texting good morning every day, unloading the dishwasher, so on and so forth. It’s a sentiment shared by many women that their current or prospective partners are not emotionally available, compassionate, or investing in acts of service/quality time/words of affirmation in the way they want. It extends beyond dating into long term relationships as a whole, and how men and women view commitment & affection differently.

A man may show his love by providing financial stability, planning trips together or maintaining the house, but the woman needs reassurance through other veins of intimacy. I’m not a man, so I can’t say for sure how this manifests for them. Maybe their girlfriend keeps the house clean, anticipates their emotional needs, and cooks but has a low libido and isn’t willing to compromise - causing him to feel undesired, rejected and insecure.

Obviously these examples are very traditional, and everyone is different in their needs hierarchy/love languages.

DiamondLilyD · 2022-05-20T10:45:22+00:00

Most men are porn addicted, video game obsessed dopamine junkies with zero emotional intelligence or introspection.

A lot of them don't even have good hygiene which is ridiculously simple and easy.

If you have good hygiene, have a job, don't watch porn and work on your mental health, you're already in the top 10% of men.

COLLET0R · 2022-05-20T03:57:44+00:00

What an absolute cap.

meltedjuice · 2022-05-20T10:32:59+00:00

All the answers here are the same and the sentiment in them comes up a lot, I just want to know since population wise there isn't a dearth of women, have all these men taken their own advice and given a chance to someone less shallow and less attractive?

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Alfalfa2-Throwaway · 2022-05-20T01:55:39+00:00

What's the question?

That women have low bars for getting into relationships for men or that men have low bars?

sarkington · 2022-05-20T02:14:53+00:00

If the bar is not cheating and not treating me like a maid, I only found one

dobrevaria · 2022-05-20T05:40:09+00:00

When it comes to physical attractiveness, I would not say the bar is low (even though I’ve seen beautiful female friends with very unattractive if not downright ugly guys…). However, when it comes to male behavior, the bar is indeed low. Like VERY LOW. To be fair, I think the bar for women can be low as well but well, I can’t know for sure since I’m a woman myself.

But when it comes to male behavior, women are willing to accept things which are not even the BARE MINIMUM in their relationships which baffles me. For example : their man texting others girls (and I’m not talking about female friends here…I’m talking about openly flirting with others women), neglecting them and their needs (sexually and romantically), not having some sort of personal hygiene…. To be fair, I don’t think it applies to every single men out there (thank God) but I’ve witnessed multiples cases with my friends where they were willing to put up with awful behavior, lifestyle and/or hygiene just because they were in love with the guy. Or they were willing to date broke guys with absolutely no ambition whatsoever (sometimes even unemployed AND without education) while they are in law/business/medical school busting their asses off.

That’s why I do not really agree with the ‘women have unattainable standard’ thing. Like maybe it’s because I’m still young (I’m only 20) but the women around me have very low standards and sometimes the bare minimum cannot even be delivered. I recognize however that I’m still young and that my experience is far from universal.

Lysa_Bell · 2022-05-20T06:40:03+00:00

The universal bar is different from the personal bar and it depends how high you value yourself and what is most important to you.

The universal bar for women is usually something like "kind, hygienic, not homeless, not violent"

Personal bars may very depending on your own standard and experiences. For instance: I am very kinky. I was in relationships with people that aren't kinky and I got bored with the sex. So I wanted a kinky partner. I don't care about money, height and so on. The low bar is still the same. I'm not sucking your dick if you grow cheese on it or it has to happen under a bridge because you are homeless.

Guys on this sub would say I would lower my standard because I hit the wall. I say I adjusted my preferences for what is actually important to me after figuring that out after failed relationships.

So in general the bar is low. But the personal bar may vary. Depending on experiences and preferences.

2022-05-20T08:43:30+00:00

It must be so hard for incels for not able to treat women like garbage, like the 6 ft alpha Chads always are. In a just world, all men should be equally able to treat women like trash, no matter their own looks. I just feel so much sympathy, it must be so hard on them.

there's a low bar for crude, creepy, sexist behavior? what do these women mean

ogsimpology · 2022-05-20T09:12:07+00:00

The bar for physical attractiveness for men is only high with very good looki women. Other women generally will let men get away with looking worse than those women would realistically be super attracted to.

Whereas men are attracted to most women, bur that bar is still pretty high, regardless of a lot of women meeting those standards.

Catherine772023 · 2022-05-20T12:00:44+00:00

In terms of looks yeah.

boofthegirl · 2022-05-20T12:53:52+00:00

Its not low for “male” behaviour but it’s lower than hell for normal human behaviours like house chores and childcare.

Just-_-tired · 2022-05-20T03:44:31+00:00

Yes. If a man is polite and treats his partner nice everybody is in love with him wants him. (Not the nice guy bullshit I mean genuinely nice like not being nice to get something out of you.)

That’s it. If a man is polite and kind and is bare minimum nice he is a catch.

Edit. Nvm I was thinking about joining this sub but y’all are people who won’t ever try to grow from other points a view.

Blame_the_Muse · 2022-05-20T02:03:30+00:00

99.9% of men have sex, so

Catesa · 2022-05-20T09:24:50+00:00

I think that bar is in hell for both genders.

Males will put up with abusive, out of control women as long as she gives fertility signals and allows him to play hero, she doesn't even have to be objectively pretty.

Females will put up with horrible, horrible behavior as long as you are providing something she lacks. She can brainwash herself into "loving" anyone until the cognitive dissonance gets too much. Mostly by introducing someone who is still loathsome, but is still a better option or getting into such abusive situations that she is forced to confront reality.

People are mostly annoying, messy, have psychological issues, justify their bad behavior, want to do the bare minimum and what else.

Mature men and women will take accountability for themselves and won't put up with someone who does not. And will make sure that their needs are met and won't put up with someone who won't.

Delusional people will try making sure that all their wants are cattered to. And then complain about other people not putting up with their attitude.

gate18 · 2022-05-20T09:42:08+00:00

I'm not a woman but the fact that I can wake up, have a shower or just wash my face and I'm 90% done, is pretty amazing (considering the kind of shit women have to go through to look good)

Then there are the social and political expectations.

A week ago someone around here commented that if men had a choice they would want to be women!

Amazingly bizarre.

But then again everyone takes for granted their privilege. Just a few hours ago someone replied to me by saying they feel sorry for white men, blacks are taking all the women. They said if I didn't believe him I should look at the media. The dude forgot the media is owned by white men.

We, men, especially those that don't have female friends see them all looking sexy and ignore the shit they have to go through to (a) look sexy and (b) to exist in the world. And, we have the privilege of not listening to anyone that says otherwise.

But, as with anything, personal anecdotes can prove anything, e.g. "I know this woman that rejects any man that doesn't have six-packs that are visible through his shirt" - you don't know this woman, so you can't prove me wrong, and "If you tell me women aren't like that, well you are a simp. That was easy - next?"

Lotus_82 · 2022-05-20T10:32:12+00:00

Yeah I think the bar is pretty low these days. I’m around a lot of women and I listen to them talk, whether it’s just us one on one or them talking to their girl friends at social events, and from what I’ve seen the bar is pretty low as long as you don’t fall into the profile of what most women consider painfully average / mediocre.

I have a FWBs who sends me screen shots of dudes who slide the type of guys that try to slide in her DMs and it seems like so many dudes out there are just super “basic”, for lack of a better word.

And most of them usually have the same basic profile: body is usually slightly out of shape /overweight. I had this conversation with a group of women at a social event a few weeks ago, and the consensus was that a guy who doesn’t look halfway decent just wearing a pair of nice boxer briefs is considered “out of shape” (flabby stomach, un-toned arms, etc..).

So yeah, out of shape, plays video games, eats cheap / crappy food (bonus points if he shops at Walmart), usually dropped out of college or didn’t go at all, watches anime, only speaks one language (the one they were born with), have a general lack of talent and ambition, they send messages to women they don’t know on insta and fb trying to hit on them (considered trashy and pathetic) and instead of having real life interactions they have online peers on steam or discord. I don’t even know what steam is but I’ve heard women mention it a few times in a negative way as far as guys are concerned.

So yeah, I’ve found that as long as you don’t fit the profile I described above the bar is set pretty low these days because women are super jaded at the number of mediocre men that try to talk / message them on a daily basis.

Laytheblameonluck · 2022-05-20T07:56:29+00:00

What they're saying is the bar to get in a relationship when sleeping around is higher for women than it is for men.

If you remove the sleeping around factor, women find the bar isn't as low.

Which is why women lose out by sleeping around.

GhostofCamus · 2022-05-20T13:12:48+00:00

This thread is just an invitation for people to trash men with stereotypes they picked up from TV.

TermAggravating8043 · 2022-05-20T13:26:14+00:00

I think this saying is actually meant for men in relationships already, and unfortunately it’s only something you’ll find out about that person when you’ve committed to them, living together, marriage etc

If a dad changes his kids nappy once, he’s considered a great dad, even though mum changed the other 5. Taking part in any kind parenting paints him as amazing even when he should be doing that anyway.

Not hitting women, lots of vulnerable women will consider a guy that doesn’t directly hit her ok since he’s only verbally abusive and breaks furniture when he’s drunk. This is a big one cause it’s emotional abuse and the abuser will have set the foundations, telling her she’s lucky to have him, she just means so much to him he can’t help his ‘passion’ for her etc

Housework, weaponised incompetence. “You just do it so much better than me, I WAS going to do it” ends up becoming routine where only 1 partner is doing everything yet the odd occasion when they do something simply like dishes they expect praise for it.

2022-05-20T13:44:19+00:00

Low as long as she find him attractive and i aint saying beauty only. If she doesnt find him attractive she wont give any space. Honestly i think girls should Just Go talk to the guys that they are attracted to enter in a relationship and not make games for her to be noticed for him to ask her out.

dietwindows · 2022-05-20T13:46:01+00:00

Sounds like an empirical claim. If the bar for men were low, then you'd expect them all to be in relationships.

AdobiWanKenobi · 2022-05-20T13:59:25+00:00

The concept of the bar being low is idiotic. By that logic every person I know who treats women as human beings (as they should, obviously) should be in a relationship blissfully happy. But of course that’s not happening

wtbrift · 2022-05-20T14:42:33+00:00

I would say the bar is high for matching my effort and energy. If a woman can do that, we are good. Sadly, that rarely happens but I have found a few. So I guess I am disagreeing as I choose not to spend my time with anyone.

2022-05-20T15:36:57+00:00

High for looks, low for everything else.

JediGuitarist · 2022-05-20T16:49:41+00:00

They say the bar is really low. All they want is a guy who can support himself, isn't a total creep, and has hobbies. When I point out that I have all of those things, they tell me that I shouldn't expect a cookie for being the "bare minimum".
So either the bar is really low, implying they'll accept that "bare minimum", or it's a lie and they really want someone much better. I've given up trying to figure out which is true, but apparently women are into guys who don't wipe their asses, so there's that. You make sense of it.

ruboyuri · 2022-05-20T17:25:56+00:00

For relationships

Not sex

Which is the opposite of what men do

Kentucky_Supreme · 2022-05-20T18:05:35+00:00

It only seems low to them because they're picturing Bruce Wayne. They're picturing a guy with pure sexual abundance. But they never consider what it takes for the guy to get there and the criteria that must first be met.

2022-05-20T20:00:30+00:00

Yes. It is absolutely true.

My standards are that he doesn't have really outdated facial hair (goatee) and clothing (polo shirts and cargo shorts) that is off-putting to me, takes care of himself financially, can talk about his emotions, and is interested in being in a loving, wholesome relationship where we care about each other.

I am convinced I will die alone before I meet a man like this.

69ingbasedcoomer420 · 2022-05-20T21:54:39+00:00

It’s low for Chads

daddysgotanew · 2022-05-20T22:17:54+00:00

No. Not even close. When women talk about “men” they’re talking about the ones they find attractive, so the top 5-10 percent. When they say “god I wish he’d get a job a brush his teeth before fucking me,” they’re talking about a dude that looks like Francisco Lachowski but has disgusting habits. They’re not referring to “Dave from work” who looks like Subway Jared.

Cupcakelover1985 · 2022-05-20T23:50:56+00:00

Yeah it is true. There’s a lot of desperate women that will take any man just to say they have one and all they ask if you don’t screw them over too hard. They don’t require you to be attractive, well menor, well off or even loyal. Just a steady companion. Those women are often the main ones you see online complaining about the bar being super low for men. It’s because they have no self esteem so they don’t have any standards for men or enforce any boundaries.

Then there’s the second set that allow men to get away with anything if he passes their threshold for looks charm and seduction. They also complain loudly about the bar being low for men because they only require a couple basic things from men that don’t inform how he’ll treat them.

Women outside those two groups who hold men to higher standard. Most average men are dating women from this group as women in group 1 falls below what they find attractive so they don’t register to most men and the women in group 2 have such high standards for looks that they won’t even entertain average men in any capacity. The women in group 3 make up the bulk of women I’d say and you don’t really see them complaining about standards being low for men because if they date and man and he’s not meeting most of her expectations she’ll drop and replace him. She won’t put up with him out of desperation or because she’s lust blinded.

Immediate-Machine-18 · 2022-05-23T06:58:20+00:00

https://thebolditalic.com/the-two-worlds-of-tinder-f1c34e800db4

Immediate-Machine-18 · 2022-08-17T16:34:53+00:00

It does settling is because of a lack of personal achievements lol.

Title	Women say that the bar low for men? Is this really true?
Author	realityczech89
Upvotes	83
Comments	431
Date	May 20, 2022 1:40 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/utif6y/women_say_that_the_bar_low_for_men_is_this_really/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/women-say-that-the-bar-low-for-men-is-this-really.1119280 https://theredarchive.com/post/1119280

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