If a girl likes you, she's more likely to make you wait

Nucyon · 2023-04-26T05:42:12+00:00

That assumes that women sit down over a spreadsheet when making relationship decisions, rather than follow their emotions.

I did have girls who made me wait, but they weren't THAT into me. On both occasions they broke up with me, before we even did it.

On the other hand all my long lasting relationships had no waiting period.

And I am not a high value male. My job only feeds myself, I'm nerdy and while I look amazing now that I can grow a beard, I really couldn't until my late 20s.

odd_cloud · 2023-04-26T09:49:09+00:00

So, is it basically “hot guy -> sleep with him now, normal guy -> make him wait”?

I wonder how much it attributes to all this talk about being “easy” or simply to the fact that a regular guy is worthless without commitment.

It’s also interesting if the concept of “being used for sex” is based on the implicit expectation of commitment from a regular guy.

Rahim556 · 2023-04-26T12:51:44+00:00

If a woman likes you for your RMV she will be inclined to use this tactic, I agree. Liking you for your RMV means she wants a relationship with you (or potentially does) and/or has labelled you as "BF material" (which we have already established in another post is not the compliment women think it is).

☝️ However, if she likes a guy for his SMV, meaning she finds him "hawt" and gets "tingles" from said man, then I will argue that she will be inclined to sleep with him much sooner. The classic example of Chad having a ONS, for example, or hooking up with a chick in a club bathroom for a quick release never to be seen again (probably without knowing each other's names). The reason being 2 fold: 1. The guy is just too hawt 🔥 to wait 2. His SMV is so high (or at least high relative to her's) that she has already labelled him as just a "fun/fling guy" because she knows he's a (possible) fuckboi with tons of options who (likely) won't commit anyway, so why not have some fun with a hot guy she'll likely never see again.

The issue is that men want to be put into the high SMV category, the fun/fling guy, not the BF material guy category. Men want what women have regularly and hate, and what they wish they didn't have to deal with: to be sexually objectified like pieces of meat.

Even if a guy is actually wanting a relationship and is the monogamous type, for example, he still wants to be placed in the hot fling guy category initially, and then build from there because he knows she valued him for how attractive and hawt 🔥 he is off the bat, and then can display his other good (RMV) qualities.

Edit to add this: So this is why most guys will never judge a woman negatively for sleeping with them soon, because it shows that she's that into him (physically/sexually). The only reason some men may judge a woman sleeping even with them quickly negatively is because it shows a behavior that likely suggests that she sleeps with other men quickly as well, and the man has no way of knowing otherwise and must assume the worst. However, hypothetically, if a man knew that a woman was a virgin, or even that she just didn't sleep with other men quickly, but did for him, no negative judgement would occur. Men want to be the one she breaks her normal rules for ideally, and the worst possible scenario for a man is that she broke rules for others but not for you. Consistency would fall in the middle, of neither favorable nor unfavorable.

tired_hillbilly · 2023-04-26T06:13:31+00:00

I have said it before, but modern society, when faced with a prisoner's dilemma, always chooses defect.

If the man's SMV is too much higher than ours, we know he has options and the window of opportunity with him will be too short for this strategy.

If you would ALL make EVERY guy wait, he wouldn't have these options.

Sabrepill · 2023-04-26T05:58:54+00:00

The girls are gonna hate me for this but i truly think the concept of purposely waiting is pretty stupid. Going off some imaginary time limit rather than just feeling the vibe and choosing to develop a relationship organically is kind of cringe.

Obviously everyone is different, but the more I liked a guy, the sooner I wanted to be sexual and/or intimate with him. That didn’t mean I went all the way on the first night with every guy I was super into. But determining sexual compatibility at an efficient pace is important to see if we would truly be compatible long term or else I’d just be wasting my time.

Edit: I also want to add when this topic is brought up, I feel like PIV is the main focus. But there are so many other ways to engage in sexual contact with someone without engaging in PIV, even if it’s just basic like touching/feeling and making out. I think what bothers a lot of guys is the lack of sexual contact at all, and I do personally find it weird to not even want to have any form of sexual contact with someone you say you “like”. If you truly like someone, why play games? I certainly wouldn’t be too thrilled if a guy said he really liked me, but wasn’t even taking baby steps to try to make sexual contact with me. Sex is what separates a romantic relationship from a friendship.

VehementlyDrawn · 2023-04-26T12:06:37+00:00

Regular guys

Therefore, it is in a woman's best interest to APPEAR as though she is virtuous, modest, demur, and chaste - If she wants you to stick around.

So if she gives a damn about your opinion she'll likely want you to perceive her as NOT being "for the streets". This extends to single mothers as well.

So women are acknowledging that even APPEARING promiscuous will turn men off?

High SMV men

If the man's SMV is too much higher than ours, we know he has options and the window of opportunity with him will be too short for this strategy. Not putting out will cause him to leave 100%. Putting out sooner you run the risk of being seen as cheap, but at least it's not a guaranteed "L". In this case we usually roll the dice.

This man won't stay regardless of how fast you give up sex. This is why men get the ick, because now they're vying for the attention of a woman who's giving casual sex to a guy out of her league & then they make the guy in her league wait.

Reptheft · 2023-04-26T15:26:18+00:00

If the man's SMV is too much higher than ours, we know he has options and the window of opportunity with him will be too short for this strategy. Not putting out will cause him to leave 100%. Putting out sooner you run the risk of being seen as cheap, but at least it's not a guaranteed "L". In this case we usually roll the dice.

You defeated your own CMV. If the guys women view as "high SMV" get laid immediately then, no, women do not "like" the waiting guy more. They literally view him as lower SMV.

The main form of "like" we care about in TRP is sexual attraction.

2023-04-26T11:39:31+00:00

Your post says a few things and they're all bad. Women make men wait, but only if they don't find him as sexually attractive. You admitted that when you said they don't make high smv men wait because they know men will leave them without it. If you really cared about a guy why would you treat him like that? You're telling him that he's less to you when you apply strategies.

Therefore, it is in a woman's best interest to APPEAR as though she is virtuous, modest, demur, and chaste - If she wants you to stick around.

This would also apply to high value men too, but especially to them. Actual high value men don't need to date down and they don't need to pretend to have interest that's not there to get sex. This attitude screams of low self esteem and seeing yourself as being used by having sex. Why would a man want a woman that sees herself that way and sleeps with men that she believes are trying to use her?

You don't need to justify having sex with anyone or waiting until marriage, but this attitude is a hot mess that no man will find attractive.

bootyhunter69420 · 2023-04-26T11:52:45+00:00

I actually experienced this. My ex made me wait a few months for sex. After we got closer, she told me she used to have sex with guys she didn't even like and her body count was close to 40. How do you think that made me feel? She thought our sex meant more because we had a strong relationship but I felt like she wasn't as attracted to me. She didn't want to come off as "easy" to me, but based on her history, she was. Just not for me. I had to "earn" it I guess.

eefr · 2023-04-26T07:09:06+00:00

No thanks.

I don't use sex, or the withholding of sex, as a manipulative tool to get what I want out of people. I don't think that's a decent way to treat anyone.

I have sex with people when I feel comfortable doing so, which is usually early. Doing so has never prevented me from finding long-term relationships, because most people aren't as cold and calculating as you think they are. They aren't calculating some imaginary market value all the time; they are assessing their feelings and acting in accordance with them. That's how humans work.

purplish_possum · 2023-04-26T07:17:37+00:00

Fuck that!

Women who play this stupid game are a hard pass.

SwimmingTheme3736 · 2023-04-26T06:39:12+00:00

Only a certain type of girl lays games like this

FlyV89 · 2023-04-26T17:10:02+00:00

If the man's SMV is too much higher than ours, we know he has options and the window of opportunity with him will be too short for this strategy. Not putting out will cause him to leave 100%. Putting out sooner you run the risk of being seen as cheap, but at least it's not a guaranteed "L". In this case we usually roll the dice.

This is it. It's the only thing that matters.

When she thinks you're HOT, she wants to sleep with you right then and there.

No feelings. No commitment. No expectations. No chivalry. No "empathy" or "emotional conection".

She wants to suck you off. That's it.

Therefore, it is in a woman's best interest to APPEAR as though she is virtuous, modest, demur, and chaste - If she wants you to stick around.

This is irrelevant. It makes sense, of course. But it's absolutely and utterly irrelevant.

She doesn't find you attractive enough to sleep with you without ulterior motives. That's it. Period.

Corolary:

She's not actually intrested in putting on a facade so you stick around.

She's not THAT intrested in you to risk being pumped and dumped by you.

Like women say nowadays:

"He's not that good looking to treat me badly"

Hoopy223 · 2023-04-26T13:35:06+00:00

Aw jeez

If a girl likes you its easy. When you’re just kids in school she will want to sit with you and all of that, ask around about you, call or message you at night, etc. As an adult its pretty much the same thing except she will want to come over to your place as well.

When they start putting conditions on everything is when you are probably a second or third place prize. Some guys are OK with that because they want to win her over, some guys aren’t.

Teflon08191 · 2023-04-26T07:31:53+00:00

As Patrice O'Neal put it, women want a man who is better than them. A woman who makes a man wait doesn't believe he's better than her. She figures she can bide her time because she doesn't think he'll be able to find a better option than her very quickly. If she does believe that he's better than her, she'll be looking to lock him down as quickly as possible because she knows it won't be long before better options present themselves to him.

It's always better to be the latter guy in her eyes than the former.

Aubrey_D_Graham · 2023-04-26T06:00:34+00:00

Some men can forgive a past, but no man can forgive a lying woman. The omission of a past is a bigger betrayal than having a past. Don't be duplicitous.

Worldly_Piano9526 · 2023-04-26T09:27:27+00:00

If you're going to play games with us just because you don't think that we will leave; that disqualifies you as a potential wife. What other manipulative games are you going to be playing on us down the road? No thank you. I'm not about to bust my ass for something that other guys, who you respect and value more than me; get for free. You can go marry them...

That's why more and more guys are adopting Rollo Tomassi's Iron Rule #3 and have been for a very long time.

Some of you ladies don't understand that your competition isn't necessarily other women, sometimes your competition is just the peace of being alone.

These days, if a woman isn't virtually begging me to be with her; I would much rather be in the gym or working...

amyg36819 · 2023-04-26T06:33:17+00:00

Men wouldn’t have a problem with waiting if a woman would make EVERY guy wait.

But like someone else said, same woman different behaviour.

Any-Chipmunk5197 · 2023-04-26T10:43:59+00:00

Doubt that. Maybe that's how you think but I don't believe that this speaks for the majority of women. How long it takes before you have sex depends on how sexualy liberated a woman is and how much she likes you/wants to have sex. Or maybe she's just horny and wants to have sex without being particularly into you

CosmicBioHazard · 2023-04-26T10:59:40+00:00

Therefore, it is in a woman's best interest to APPEAR as though she is virtuous, modest, demur, and chaste - If she wants you to stick around.

Yeah but if he’s not keen on a woman with a past then you’re not really compatible, so you might as well be honest about that. Guys here say it’s about getting sex at least as early as anyone else had, but I think that’s cope. He wants someone without a past, period, and it’s only failing that he goes “oh well she has to prove that she’s attracted enough to me to do it right away.”

Women I’ve had dates with and who liked me tended to push for sex long before I was ready, and they were fairly honest about pasts, or lack thereof.

Regular guys

High SMV men

I mean, I understand; Its a case of the guy with options vs the guy who ‘not a lot of girls like him, but I certainly do.’

That’s not how this sounds, though. It sounds like you’re personally less interested in the former than the latter. Also, you’ve got to understand, it’s the “regular guy” who’s dealt with enough rejection to be very wary of you if he suspects you didn’t make someone else wait, but he has to; He won’t see it so much as reform as a sort of ‘rejection light’ wherein he’s not good enough to have sex with at all, but for the sake of stability you’ll spend the three months or so mentally preparing to take one for the team, as it were.

Women who’ve liked me have tended to mistake me for having options when I really don’t. My looks, I guess, make it seem like I could have whoever I wanted but I’m too socially awkward to actually have options.

Scarce12 · 2023-04-26T11:43:46+00:00

Don't blame your Madonna-Whore complex on men.

THExBEARxJEW · 2023-04-26T13:42:07+00:00

Yea we know, but I don’t put up with that shit. I’m not going to play the same game with different rules.

Specialist-Action-33 · 2023-04-26T18:07:45+00:00

Except for Chad. He gets it delivered to the front door.

Now if she wants an LTR with a normal guy she will make him wait.

Windmill_flowers · 2023-04-26T19:12:28+00:00

"Waiting" is a game for two. Nothing forces man to play it.

katyushas_boyfriend · 2023-04-26T20:04:32+00:00

This post is ridiculous, the vast majority of men would not view a woman more positively for denying his sexual advances and making him wait. He WANTED to have sex with you.

The only men that would care about waiting are weird tradcon guys and they probably wouldn't even make sexual advances early on in the first place.

"I make him wait because I like him teehee" is just another cover up for AF/BB.

jxjkskkk · 2023-04-26T22:06:37+00:00

It’s kind of funny you unintentionally are proving RP philosophy here lol

Sabrepill · 2023-04-26T05:51:29+00:00

With modern women the opposite is true. If women aren’t that into a guy or are on the fence they will make him wait and extract his resources to see if they get more into him with time. When it’s Chad they duck in the first or second date because they can’t contain themselves

LoopyPro · 2023-04-26T10:11:16+00:00

Here's the thing: regular guys are very much aware how high SMV men are treated, so the way she treats him will tell him what she thinks of him. If the guy's expected to jump through hoops, he will know that he's not that special to her and that he'll be tossed aside once a high SMV guy comes along. That information demotivates regular guys, they don't want to waste their time and resources or be taken advantage of.

Men want their women to be with them because they think they are the best they can get, not because nothing better was available to her at that moment. If she really thinks that the guy is the best option overall, (high SMV) she would treat him like that.

Treacle-Flimsy · 2023-04-26T06:14:42+00:00

That's the reason a guy needs to employ dreadgame, to cut off this bs

maplehobo · 2023-04-26T06:39:00+00:00

Men usually have no problem with you making us wait as long as you're consistent. Men have a problem when women make some men wait and jump through hoops while others are given a free vip pass and yet somehow are supposed to take that as a compliment. People want fairness or at the very least honesty that's all.

eye_fuck · 2023-04-26T07:22:04+00:00

Low value, low character, low self awareness, insecure and childish behaviour. Any honest slut has higher value and better character than that. If you want to play games and see sex as a tool you use to get better relationships instead of your character and relationship value, justify your moral failings and dishonesty — you're not suited for serious healthy relationships.

And THAT's the reason you're just only being used for sex by the guys you want.

bottleblank · 2023-04-26T10:17:04+00:00

I’ve never “made a man wait” out of concern for how he would think about me.

But I’ve certainly acted in my own interests to protect myself emotionally.

If I know that someone isn’t a long-term prospect and am not emotionally attached to him, I’m not worried about him potentially ending things soon after sex. Who cares? There much less emotional risk to having sex.

If I’m really into someone, being ghosted or dumped would be more upsetting… especially if it’s right after sex. It’s just not a good idea to jump into bed with someone whose actions could have a huge impact over your well-being.

AstronautLoveShack · 2023-04-26T13:22:45+00:00

I had sex with my husband on the first date. We didn’t even make it to the restaurant until after.

That said, for me it depends on how we met, how long I knew him before he asked me out, and how the date is going. I’m not a prude, I’ve had a few ONS, but I knew every single one for a number of years. I don’t have a set number of dates or a period of time before sex, I just let the relationship unfold and when I am comfortable, horny, and the time is right, we have sex.

With my husband that time was on the way to our first date.

DicamVeritatem · 2023-04-27T23:06:11+00:00

High value men simply are not flattered when a woman makes him wait, unless he’s convinced she never ever fucked a man the same day she met him.

Just the way it is.

MarBitt · 2023-04-26T06:58:22+00:00

I guess some women do, and it may be a prevalent behavior in your culture or social circle.

I've also heard that women wait until the third date, so he doesn't think... But I've always thought it was more of a general rule to maintain her reputation. It wouldn't make sense if she only applied it to the men she liked while the others spread rumors that she practically threw herself at them on their first date in the men's toilets and accepted anal and oral in a surprising order.

Personally, I never experienced that I had to wait for a girl or a woman who wanted me. If I had to conquer, it always turned out that she just wasn't very interested. Or I'm not good at conquering and I've always messed it up. Or it could be that I myself don't get involved in sex with women who are strangers to me, unless it's downright casual and I also like to get to know her a bit first. I don't know.

As a boy I just tried things on girls I liked and it either worked or it didn't. When it didn't work out, I shifted my focus elsewhere. They were also often the ones who made moves, otherwise nothing would have happened.

My successful relationships typically started with her being more active or just as active as me. But according to this forum and what most other men write, I'm probably quite an outlier.

keenenandraz · 2023-04-26T06:34:48+00:00

Therefore, it is in a woman's best interest to APPEAR as though she is virtuous, modest, demur, and chaste - If she wants you to stick around.

Why is the solution to pretend to be virtuous, modest, demur, and chaste and not actually being those things for real, so you don't have to pretend?

If the man's SMV is too much higher than ours, we know he has options and the window of opportunity with him will be too short for this strategy

So then you admit that you see those guys of higher value which is why you sleep with them quickly. This kind of debunks your initial claim that you only make guys you like wait. In reality you make guys you see as low SMV wait, while the guys you view as high value get the cheeks right away.

TermAggravating8043 · 2023-04-26T08:34:46+00:00

This isn’t a guy/girl thing, anyone looking fir quick sex is cheap and usually comes with a big bag of mental health problems

Most adults get to know you first before jumping in the sack

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xTakki27 · 2023-04-26T07:45:23+00:00

If the man's SMV is too much higher than ours, we know he has options
and the window of opportunity with him will be too short for this
strategy.

And that's why she knows, that she has to act fast to keep a high SMV man around.
The regular 08/15 guy doesn't have those options and opportunities, so she can pretty much be as restrictive as possible, I mean, what's he going to do? Leave an opportunity behind?

Spare-Estimate5596 · 2023-04-26T17:37:41+00:00

Well yea of course. HVM have the leverage. If they want them they will put out quickly to beat out the other girls that will do the same. The average guy has to wait because what other choice does he have? This is why prostitution should be legal. Average men dont have to put up with this

downward_spiral9494 · 2023-04-28T00:35:30+00:00

I was with a girl who made me wait like 3 weeks. We had sex twice max, said she wasnt in the mood for a month after. Dumped me the same day she went on a date with another guy and fucked him right away.

Fuck all of you.

Cunts.

Fichek · 2023-04-28T12:41:36+00:00

I like how "some" women can't keep their cognitive dissonance in check for one damn post, an OP for that matter.

OP title: If a girl likes you, she's more likely to make you wait

OP content: If a girl really likes a man (high SVM man) she will put out.

KamuiObito · 2023-04-28T19:10:14+00:00

Literally me whwn i lie/ mislead people:

Financial-Call-695 · 2023-04-29T05:07:16+00:00

not really. she makes it easier

Emervila · 2023-04-26T06:16:41+00:00

A 304 is always a 304 that’s why this “strategy” makes no sense for men.

Values matter in a relationship moreover if that woman is expected to be the mother of your child hence making it “appear” doesn’t really work.

Most experienced men know the difference.

This is the male perspective: we aren’t paying 1k for a dish everybody had for 10$. Once your body count is at 304 level it’s done your value is lesser compared to a virtuous woman. There can be some men still accepting some level of LTR but makes no sense to “course correct” because the tiger already has way to many stripes.

Apprehensive_Boat_70 · 2023-04-26T07:57:48+00:00

So if girl likes you she is more likely to try and deceive you, cool, and somehow you manage to make it seem like it is a guys fault for valuing that "oh well, since you value modest women you cant complain about women trying to appear to be modest so you consider them a compatible partner" imagine if men used this bullshit logic to justify lying about salary or hobbies or anything a woman could consider important, no doubt there would be a lot of outrage, so much that in some places this is called rape by deception but only if a man does it, if a woman does it men should take the L, smh, it seems leveling up as a man is also a matter of survival now.

Nonsense, if a girl truly likes you she wont lie to your face, this girl is just trying to leech off you, it doesnt has to be money, a mans emotional resources are valuable too.

ohdiddly · 2023-04-26T08:29:33+00:00

I can’t imagine setting an arbitrary time limit on when I can have sex LMAOOO

If I’m super into a guy, of course we’re fucking ASAP?? And if that filters out the red pill guys who don’t respect ‘easy women’ then that’s even better!! 😍

James_Cruse · 2023-04-26T09:15:51+00:00

Purposely Waiting for Sex = Manipulative & Lying Bad Faith Gambit to make yourself appear to be more chaste/pious than you actually are.

If you want to have sex - putting off sex won’t help you land a high quality man because:

it will filter out the high quality men (they’ve got so many other female options who are just as good as you that will have sex quickly) and
filter IN low quality guys that have NO other female options so they are happy to wait - because they have zero other options anyway - so they would have been waiting whether dating you or not.
Worst of all - if the low quality man (or ANY MAN) finds out that you slept with another man before him faster than the time you made him wait, he’ll leave you quickly or deeply resent you if you’re aleady married and he can’t easily leave.

I’ve seen (3.) before - when a man waiting 2-4 months of dates and he finds out that she slept with another guy on the first date and another one on the 2nd date and dated those men long term. He feels like a loser, who’s her last option and she’s longing for those other men and he’s a consolation - men leave those women shortly after to find a woman that sleeps with him quickly because he’s the best she can get.

Every serious girlfriend I’ve had, I slept with in 2 dates or less. However, just because I sleep with a woman, doesn’t mean I want a serious relationship. But for most women - they will never find out if he wants a long term relationship with them if they make him wait.

CommunicationNo9896 · 2023-04-26T14:11:55+00:00

This is annoying because waiting is for her, not for the man.

If she respects her own body, and her own dignity, she would wait for the right man anyway.

If she is giving sex for free to random hot men that says more about her not being very trustworthy for investing a relationship.

Purple_Cruncher_123 · 2023-04-26T06:20:43+00:00

Nothing to do with if I like you or not tbh. I now make men wait a little regardless. Got sick of feeling like a fleshlight with a pulse

shrimp_dicks · 2023-04-26T07:02:32+00:00

Maybe you got pump and dumped a bunch in the past because you aren't as good of a liar as you think.

Dating a woman who lies about her sex life is a great way to end up getting abused or raisimg some other dudes baby.

Most guys don't feel bad using girls that are trying to use them. Sorry.

King-SAMO · 2023-04-26T13:29:36+00:00

Idk why it's so difficult for people to understand, that if someone is dating with the intention of having a long term, intimate, romantic relationship, then their priority is going to be focused on assessing whether someone actually wants to be with them, instead of just fucking them.

Women who are dating with the intention of securing a partner are going to choose a partner that displays behaviors that proves he doesn't just want to pump and dump.

Men who have zero ability to delay gratification, men who immediately demand sex, men who push boundaries, men who whine and try to manipulate sex out of someone aren't the type of partners these women are looking for.

You people always seem completely incapable of understanding how people assess compatibility for long term companionship.

Men and women that are dating with intention for long term relationships, don't have the same priorities or motives of people looking for casual sex or one night stands. Their focus is finding a stable person who can function with them as a partner. Not some sex hound who lacks impulse control that demands sex every 5 seconds.

There are different groups of people in the dating pool with different priorities. Men and women that aren't jumping in bed after a first glance have other priorities that they're trying to assess BEFORE they get physically intimate with someone. These people aren't trying to play "games" or "appear" a certain way, they're trying to determine ifs someone will be an actually partner and won't run off as soon as they get some ass.

ihih_reddit · 2023-04-26T05:37:35+00:00

If a girl likes you, she's more likely to make you wait

It makes no sense, but yes I agree

gymbronyc718 · 2023-04-26T11:06:59+00:00

MEN: "She slept with me on the first date and I didn't even have to buy her dinner? What a fucking dirty slut, her n count must be through the roof because there is NO WAY any self respecting woman will sleep with a guy like me so fast unless she was doing it wjth everyone".

Also MEN: "She made me wait 3 dates to have sex, that scheming, game playing, manipulating harlot. I will show her. I'm sure she sucked Chad's cock an hour after meeting him at least once in her life."

CostAncient1473 · 2023-04-26T05:52:41+00:00

Making a man wait can be a red flag as you should know that women have a lot of freedom around these parts and they can lie about their past and sometimes get away with it until it is exposed or discovered.

For example, let's say you barely know her and all you did is talk to her bit by bit, letting her know that you like her. All simple but yet intense right?

But guess what, in that case, you don't know her true colors, her past and what type of lifestyle she has herself within. She can always have a boyfriend anywhere or a homie that she don't mind screwing around with, in a crushy way or some crap which can all lead to that,

Having a man wait, can result that even if she comes back out of no where acting all interested in you all of the sudden can really be SUS at best that ARE you going to be "special someone" within her life???

OR!, is it your turn to take the spot by her side.

It's a risky gamble to even know what a woman's intentions are of what they plan or determine if they got options they can waver.

Taraa_Sitaraa · 2023-04-26T07:56:39+00:00

I am not going to have sex with a guy be it HVM or whatever ( don't believe in these terms anyway) unless we are in a committed relationship and I will wait because I need to develop an emotional intimate bond with the said guy before I sleep with him. If he thinks I am not interested because I asked him to wait and leaves me over it then it's actually great because in my head all that guy wanted was to use me for sex and I am glad I didn't give him that. He can then find someone who has same choices as him or who he can manipulate into sex and I'll find someone who's compatible with my choices.

WowYouMustBeJoking · 2023-04-26T08:39:14+00:00

This is wrong and you demonstrated it yourself. As you describe in your high smv men section - when a woman really likes a man, she won't be playing games and risk him moving on. She will only do that if she doesn't care either way.

toasterchild · 2023-04-26T16:01:37+00:00

If purity culture shit dies it will only be good for both men and women. So many men and women around here are terrified to show any sexual interest like having those feeling or ever expressing them is bad. America is so sexually repressed. It's fucking ok to be sexually interested in people you are dating, fucking hell. When women say they don't want to be sexually objectified that means they don't want to be dated just for sex, it doesn't mean they don't want you to show any interest at all in sex. And women, do you really want to date someone you feel you have to pretend to be a totally different person for? What happens when they find out that you are in truth much more sexual than you led on?

Seattle_Beach · 2023-04-26T11:26:57+00:00

Thank you for posting this. I hate it when I hear the argument "why are you making me wait for something you already gave someone else". It's because I don't want to screw things up! I don't even like sex that much if I have it too quickly.

Larcie1996 · 2023-04-26T06:49:02+00:00

If somebody truly likes you back and appreciates you they'll have patience for you until you're already to take the leap forward into having sexual relations with them.

TheOrangeGhost · 2023-04-26T08:43:39+00:00

I'm pretty sure this group isn't for me but I really do wish the guys and gals in this group the best.

I hope you get to get lost in her eyes And I hope you get hear her laughs and her sighs. I hope you get to comfort her at her lows. And I hope get to see her highs.

I hope she maks you go the extra mile And I hope she makes you smile. I hope you stay up way too late And I hope you wake up in a pile.

I hope she lets you listen her favorite song. And I hope she makes your all your days feel long. I hope you know the depths of her love. And I hope then that you'll know all knew before was wrong.

amyg36819 · 2023-04-26T10:31:49+00:00

idk… it depends on the woman. for me personally i will only make them ‘wait’ 3 dates max. only cause more times than not guys will ghost you if you sleep on the very first date. however making them ‘wait’ like 1 month is pretty rude in my opinion. usually games are played and she finds someone better than you. you see the guy chasing her while she is getting dates and sex from other men. i seen guys get really hurt because women take advantage of their kindness.

for me 2 dates is perfect. first date they will think you’re just in it only for sex. 3 dates or more it becomes complicated. things like he gets bored so he starts losing interest or he pretends to want to be closer to you. or you can end up using each other. girl is getting free meals cause guy doesn’t mind simping for her

but just to emphasise: waiting for me is not being completely void of emotion for all 3 dates. for me it means us getting to know each others’ personality before doing the nasty

damn all this talking now i forgot my point 🤕. i think it was: it depends on the woman. we make them wait like 2 or 3 dates cause we want to know them as people first before sleeping with each other. for me im most definitely being affectionate. however i will admit i have seen women being like players. using her body for sex and she’s getting gifts and meals. usually 304s to be fair. hmmmm.. i am realising that women truly do have the upper hand when dating 🫣

januaryphilosopher · 2023-04-26T11:14:05+00:00

I don't think that most women change behaviour the way you think they do. They tend to have the same comfort threshold with sex no matter how much they "value" a man, and are rarely more calculating than thinking whether they're comfortable. For some it's early, and for others it's late.

lolthankstinder · 2023-04-26T13:39:37+00:00

I consider myself very regular, but for our second date, I invited my now girlfriend over for ~~wine and charcuterie~~ sex. The very next evening, she invited me over to ~~show me her place~~ have sex. We were casual for several months and then became official.

One-Introduction-566 · 2023-04-26T14:23:51+00:00

I’m pretty sure the guy I’m dating thinks I’m either a virgin or only been with one man, but he hasn’t asked. I have no clue if he’s a virgin or not and since he hasn’t asked, I’m not going to, I guess it’s just not classy to talk about. He also wants to wait so it’s not just something I forced upon him.

Kobe_curry24 · 2023-04-26T14:41:46+00:00

Nall Bruv this not 1957 if she wants you , just know things will move rapidly after 3 weeks at the most a month only because she could of been busy other than that don’t take no women seriously after a month

Redditcritic6666 · 2023-04-26T15:17:19+00:00

If a girls likes you, but she has deep issues like insecurities or are unable to process her feelings and express them in a positive view... she's more likely to make you wait. It prospond the problem at least, and at most it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy of missed chances and relationship failures.

AssistTemporary8422 · 2023-04-26T17:08:53+00:00

Yes making you wait is in her best interest but she is also worried you will lose interest if she makes you wait too long, and she may feel a lot of attraction for you, and can't wait herself.

DoinIt989 · 2023-04-27T13:23:06+00:00

Wait for how long? She might make you wait an extra 1 or 2 dates, but if a woman wants a man she's not gonna be able to resist him for much longer than that. And a guy not trying to break that tension early on is probably going to seem like he's not interested in her.

2023-04-27T22:08:26+00:00

If the man's SMV is too much higher than ours, we know he has options and the window of opportunity with him will be too short for this strategy. Not putting out will cause him to leave 100%. Putting out sooner you run the risk of being seen as cheap, but at least it's not a guaranteed "L". In this case we usually roll the dice.

Seriously, thank you for having the courage to acknowledge this.

HobbitShaker88 · 2023-04-28T14:57:53+00:00

It really depends on the person. Ive always made a guy wait but its because of my sexual values and because sex before I am comfortable is terrible for me. There is no one-size-fits-all answer for this.

I have dated men who were on the same wavelength as me in terms of waiting, men who wanted to wait EVEN longer, and men who complained and used it against me. One of my exes said he preferred women who slept around. Another said it was a turn off that I seemed virtuous. Again- this depends on the person and their VALUES.

Title	If a girl likes you, she's more likely to make you wait
Author	Windmill_flowers
Upvotes	51
Comments	363
Date	April 26, 2023 5:36 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/12z7q6y/if_a_girl_likes_you_shes_more_likely_to_make_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/if-a-girl-likes-you-shes-more-likely-to-make-you.1217783 https://theredarchive.com/post/1217783

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