Are guys who have more success in their 30s actually out for revenge like some narratives here suggest?

OtPayOkerSmay · 2024-08-14T12:23:25+00:00

I doubt it's revenge, they just want to experience something they couldn't while they were in 20s. Why not?

It's like when some men get money in their 40s and start buying sport cars etc...somebody will call it midlife crisis or whatever, but it's not. Now they can just afford something they dreamed as a kid, they would buy it at 21 as well, but they just couldn't

noonereadsthisstuff · 2024-08-14T12:31:31+00:00

Whats the revenge?

I had way more success in my 30s than my 20s ut its just a fact. Im not making it up to get my revenge on women.

szclimber · 2024-08-14T13:41:50+00:00

What revenge, no? Many guys do feel resentment and frustration for missing out in their 20s.

MouseAware809 · 2024-08-14T13:29:33+00:00

Ahhh yes, because a man does not want to settle at 30, 40, it is revenge of course.

Maybe he just does not want to settle.

GrandpaDallas · 2024-08-14T13:06:16+00:00

I'm in the second category. I didn't have much sexual success in my younger years, but in part due to my own apathy towards it. Now, I'm much more grown, and I'm sort of making up for lost time, but in the mindset of having fun with my current life.

tiddermacss · 2024-08-14T12:44:00+00:00

No revenge but they kinda marry/settle down halfheartedly.

HydrazineHawk · 2024-08-14T14:01:11+00:00

I’ve witnessed a sort of “revenge” that occurs for late bloomers (men and women) and it’s less about revenge and more about being jaded. When you feel like the world has treated you poorly, the way you treat the world tends to reflect that.

Back 2013 when I first discovered the TRP and actually started putting it into practice, I became really disheartened by how well it worked and had a brief period of resentment toward women as a result. Similarly, I’ve known women who were treated poorly in high school, had a major “glow up” in their 20’s and proceeded to weaponize sex against men as a means of making amends for their high school years where the felt powerless and rejected

SuckMyBigCockBitch69 · 2024-08-14T14:22:19+00:00

As a middle aged person, I think we over-romanticize youth. We have this belief that we should be our most happy when we’re at our most beautiful, because it’s all downhill from there.

I struggled a lot in my 20s. Things were really hard in my launch to adulthood.

I have taken a very different path as a person who grew up awkward and nerdy with parents who were disappointed in me because of it. I look at happy people, and I take advice from and emulate them. My parents are/were not happy. My husband and I are really happy with each other.

My kids are teenagers, and they’re beautiful. They struggle with anxiety and being overwhelmed. Their social lives are not perfect. Meanwhile, I have faith that life will get better for them as they approach adulthood.

TheAvocadoSlayer · 2024-08-14T15:03:09+00:00

What do you mean by “revenge?” Do you mean they’re just going on in life being successful? That’s not revenge.

DumbWordsmith · 2024-08-14T12:21:02+00:00

Revenge against who? How?

If anything, older men are more likely to be jaded or disillusioned IME.

Also, even if your options increase significantly with age, your dating pool in your 30s and 40s will likely be shittier than it was in your 20s, so good luck getting any "revenge" against people who probably don't even remember that you exist 99.99% of the time.

Alwaysnthered · 2024-08-14T14:15:25+00:00

I don't think most men want "revenge", but I do know that some women will lambast men who are in their 30's dating women in their physical prime (20's) - becuase they CAN now (and could not earlier).

We should not be shaming men in their prime who decide to date women in their prime, when those men missed out on prime women earlier while women dated the prime men.

2024-08-14T14:23:29+00:00

I don't think so most ppl think about revenge. That is true that most men can become more attractive at least till 35.

meteorness123 · 2024-08-14T14:28:49+00:00

I swear, everybody here needs to go on a silent retreat.

Which-Inspector1409 · 2024-08-14T15:22:52+00:00

I thought I would be, but now that my work is paying off (early 30s) I dont think about the past as much. Just enjoying the present and planning for the future. Meeting people, working hard and having fun. Getting to this position was hell though.

2024-08-14T15:26:07+00:00

Some people have said it on here that guys in their 30s who have more success compared to in their 20s, are doing it out of a revenge fantasy, to strike back for lost times.

No, you got that wrong. Some people said that some people's revenge fantasy is to have more success, be more desired in their 30s than in their 20s, and use that shift of power compared to women of that age "hitting the wall", to reject lots of women who would have rejected them in their 20s.

PiastriPs3 · 2024-08-15T07:31:47+00:00

I wouldn't say revenge. Most men arent that petty unless theyre straigt up incels or Tate wannabees. But I do think their experiences harden their hearts enough that they lose a bit of humanity towards the women they date and have relationships with and they become cynical about the idea of love. They do act lot more coldly and transactional towards women and are probably more likely to monkey branching in their 30s. My older cousin is one of those late bloomers and he is pretty ruthless to women once he found his own game. He's now married to a girl a decade younger than himself(38m) but I doubt he loves her and I can forsee a lot of problems in their marriage.

Chance_Journalist_34 · 2024-08-15T09:57:35+00:00

A couple of my single mates are in this boat. They seem to be living it up. When we go out and chat about it they dont seem to have any animosity or revenge at heart, in fact they seem to be very happy life is working for them. What they both tell me is that they dont put up with any crap or games from any women, and are quick to dump any who dont fit or improve their lives.

SecondEldenLord · 2024-08-14T13:07:13+00:00

Not revenge, they wanna make up for their lost time. Women are in their prime when they are younger and men are in their prime when they are older. So it just makes sense that men just wanna have fun just like women did. If women can have a hoe phase, why can't men?

John_Oakman · 2024-08-14T12:26:52+00:00

Depends on whether one defines living well as a form of revenge or that saying being merely being another empty platitude.

Conscious_Air_8675 · 2024-08-14T14:33:23+00:00

I can see why a bitter chick would see it as revenge. The truth is that’s it’s pretty damn easy to tell when you’re “good enough” for somebody only for the reason that their time in the spotlight is up.

jay10033 · 2024-08-14T13:48:23+00:00

It's just a woman's fever dreams that men are out for revenge because the women aren't being chosen by men who become successful or are clearly on the path to success in their 30s. The wheat is quickly separated from the chaff in the 30s and is clear who is on the path to (conventional) success. They bet on the wrong horse in their 20s and when they are rejected by men who may have wanted them in their 20s, they conjure up a revenge fantasy. It's really that men don't see them as relationship material, that simple.

JSears90210 · 2024-08-14T13:35:01+00:00

I think most people are just happy when their life situation improves. Especially if other people either are happy for them or at the very least not critical/jealous.

The 39 year old guy who is dating a cute 27 year old is damn happy. If he starts to hear criticism from people about the age gap he may get defensive and lash out. But in general people keep it moving when they are successful and don't need to flaunt it in other peoples faces.

januaryphilosopher · 2024-08-14T15:03:02+00:00

Most men aren't bitter and wanting to "strike" at the women who are romantically interested in them. They usually want normal, boring things like to settle down and have a family.

Visual-Community-743 · 2024-08-14T14:17:14+00:00

Like anything depends on the partner. Definitely have sniffed out some girls looking for "safe husbands" trying to settle down, talking about their history with "players".

And I did get some minor satisfaction for leaving them on the hook after a while.

Personally I was in a LTR throughout my 20s and have some minor resentment from that but not directed towards my ex at all.

themoderation · 2024-08-14T13:58:28+00:00

Doing what out of revenge? Dating?

2024-08-14T16:12:06+00:00

Guys want sex, regardless

It just happens that a lot of guys become more appealing sexually as they get older, so more women flock to them. But their focus is still on sex as it was. Men are simple creatures

If a girl who did a man wrong in the past wanted to have sex with him after all these years, most men would gladly throb their cocks in them

SilentFroggy · 2024-08-14T18:13:52+00:00

I think revenge only happens when they had girlfriends that cheat/dump them.

Idol_Four · 2024-08-15T01:10:35+00:00

Even though that could be the case for some men, I'd argue that no, this isn't the norm. Me and my best friend are much more successful now than we were in our 20s and it is not out of revenge, and there are definitely no bad feelings involved. If we are in a relationship, the relationship is going nicely and smoothly, with no mistakes like in the past. If it goes full circle , we part ways, mostly in good terms. If there is no long term relationship present, we both happen to share the same philosophy, which is "meet new people, have fun, be your best self, enjoy as much of life as you can and help everyone else around you enjoy it too". That, in some cases, involves different girls (since there is no relationship) coming and going frequently. At the moment, I am in a relationship of sorts. My buddy just came out of one like 3 months ago. Since then, he's been with many women. He doesn't do it out of spite. He has a high drive, and he enjoys female company. He's into the night life. All that often leads to one night stands or situations with casual hookups. Everyone is happy. That's it.

Gmed66 · 2024-08-15T01:55:33+00:00

The most success I had was when I was 19-22. It's harder now in my 30s even though I'm extremely successful.

Turbulent-Tonight975 · 2024-08-15T04:21:03+00:00

I think it is more about them having seen the world for what it is and now live their lives based on that.

We've seen how dating and society work in our 20s while we were working our asses off trying to get ahead in something. We get to our 30s having achieved some goals and walk into a work that treats us very different. We realize that we really are not that much different than our 20s, yet people and women now act like we have completely changed into something else. We see that there is nothing real to this other than we offer more utility than we used too.

I've seen the same women in their 20s who were very confident attractive having every option now become somewhat desperate acting when the tables have turned and her options are nowhere near at her peak. We have seen the same women who never seemed to have much interest in us in our friends group put out feelings or be very direct in how they would be fine dating us. We we how people seem to offer us far more respect just because we have some title in front of our names.

I think myself and many other guys in my position (30s) live our lives with a state of awareness in how things actually work. The sense of idealism of our teens and 20s died awhile ago. With dating, it's about realizing that women like you for WHAT YOU OFFER not WHO YOU ARE.

I don't feel a sense of anger towards women for this attitude. I accept it as them doing what they think will give them what they want. I just see it as them doing what they want while I don't have to play by their game just because women my age feel like their clocks are ticking. I can take my time and date younger women, or keep my options open with women closer in age. I don't feel pressured by bullshit societal messaging that I need a wife now because women my age would benefit from guys like me believing that. They lived it up in their 20s and are now in decline, I am ready to live my life now.

Nihi1986 · 2024-08-14T16:30:11+00:00

I have more success in my 30's but that's probably because I spent my 20's with one girl, so I didn't know much about the dating market, honestly...

What revenge? What are those narratives? If you mean those where the invisible man now gets the attention but those previously attractive women are now overweight single moms and invisible to him... that's not happening to me but it doesn't feel like it's intentional, it's not a revenge, it's a guy genuinely not feeling attraction or enough interest for a girl who didn't value him back in highschool or college simply because she became considerably less attractive while he became more socially skilled, finantially succesful, likely got a more fitting style and so on...

Dating market. There's no revenge, those are just the dynamics in that market, some stuff that could happen to anyone would increase or decrease your sexual market value, and as awful as the concept is, whether we agree or disagree with that market, it's neutral, never personal. In other words, if the guy in his 30's gets approached by the woman he was infatuated with for two years, he will definitely date her as long as she's still attractive. If she's not attractive enough and good dating material, she goes to the fuckzone... that's not revenge, those are the dynamics of the market.

AreOut · 2024-08-14T17:12:39+00:00

what is here revenge exactly, having a success?

2024-08-14T17:16:32+00:00

That's my case. I married a woman 7 years younger, and it wasn't out of revenge. There was a side effect that could be seen as revenge on my part, but it wasn't. Men who become desirable at 30 simply want to experience what they couldn't do before, be it casual sex or a relationship, in my case, I chose to have a relationship with someone who didn't have N Count

Illustrious_Wish_383 · 2024-08-14T21:39:37+00:00

I had more success in my 20's. Post divorce success has been literally zero.

DankuTwo · 2024-08-14T22:27:54+00:00

I've been MUCH more successful in my 30s than I was in my 20s. Definitely not "out for revenge"....just trying to do the best i can (like everyone else).

toasterchild · 2024-08-14T22:42:57+00:00

I don't think most are motivated by revenge, most late bloomers are totally fine. I do see guys comment here semi often who say they purposefully treat women shitty because of revenge though. I think they are a pretty small percentage of late bloomers but may seem like a lot when they band together online.

LotBuilder · 2024-08-15T04:58:24+00:00

No, but it’s unfair to expect them to settle down and only be with one girl when they suddenly have all of these options. Playing the field when you finally can is not “revenge” though some women may think so

VWGUYWV · 2024-08-15T18:36:42+00:00

I don’t want revenge

But having women send me signals and I ignore them is somewhat delicious

katana236 · 2024-08-14T12:16:06+00:00

Maybe 1/10000. The rest are just happy to have a relationship and could give a rats ass about some made up revenge fantasy.

Unhappy_Offer_1822 · 2024-08-14T12:41:02+00:00

im a bit confused. what exactly are they doing out of revenge? dating?

for some reason success and revenge dont seem to mesh well together

flipsidetroll · 2024-08-14T14:52:42+00:00

I don’t think all are. But I’m sure some harbour some resentment. HOWEVER, bear in mind how much we project on to other people, thinking they are using our insecurities, when they mostly aren’t. So we can see something that wasn’t there. AND, if they do it for revenge, well then they are just like women and the bear and thinking all women are the same. AND, considering PUAs invented negging, manosphere men can’t be surprised when women use the same techniques on them. They seem to be awfully quick to forget that tactic and instead get all sensitive sally about perceived insults.

DeJuanBallard · 2024-08-14T15:20:20+00:00

No one is doing it out of revenge, you consume to much feminazi rhetoric online. Go outside.

Waxico · 2024-08-14T13:19:44+00:00

I was much more successful being 25+ than being 20-25 but tbh I knew why I wasn't doing well with girls. It was mainly because I didn't have much to offer and didn't have any plan for my life, guy who is wasting life and is not doing anything interesting is not a good partner material. But once I've left my comfort zone and got education, job, car, took care of my appearance and started doing cool things - I've started doing really well with girls. I wasn't out for any revenge - it's a silly idea. But I was envious of girls that are my age and are doing much better in life, I've felt like a big child while they were passionate and talented women, I was probably on the verge of becoming bitter - but I've decided that I do not want to live like that anymore. I wanted to be like these young women - not really for romantic reasons, I just wanted to be like them.

When I've finally had some success - I was simply happy to get attention and compliments from women, but for me even more important was that I've finally gained confidence to become person that I've always wanted to be. I was just too lazy and too undecided to do something.

MyLastBestChance · 2024-08-14T12:15:46+00:00

I think most of the “revenge” talk here is fever dreams spouted by angry young men who somehow believe that they will be attractive and successful in their thirties when all of those cheerleaders “hit the wall”.

They are fantasizing about something that will never come to be, as a panacea for their current bitterness and insecurity.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2024-08-14T13:02:36+00:00

Most people who are actually successful need more than just “revenge” motivating them to actually be successful.

The “when I make all my money and then you’ll be sorry: all women will be!” Is just a childhood revenge fantasy.

Evening-Standard13 · 2024-08-14T12:20:29+00:00

Honestly I have thought about it, but as time moves on I want to be a good person.

I think a lot of women deserve to have a bad time in their 30s but I have no interest in purposefully hurting people.

Even if I become more desirable I'll be checked out genuinely like a monk. Or I'm paying for sex.

It's 20s women or bust ultimately. After going through the spoiled conceded nature of city girls.

Any women who is at least still somewhat desirable on paper but is still single in her 30s is a giant fucking red flag.

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SaBahRub · 2024-08-14T15:34:11+00:00

As to all your questions, the answer is “some, not all”

justsomelizard30 · 2024-08-14T15:56:39+00:00

I'm trying to live better in my thirties because I'm the one that has to deal with my stupid life.

W-Pilled · 2024-08-14T16:44:57+00:00

By the time you are in you're 30s you don't have time for revenge or being angry.

You just want to find fulfillment

ladyindev · 2024-08-14T17:53:08+00:00

Some are but it’s probably more likely that many here get off on the idea that this could be them, even if it isn’t. Or their misogyny drives them to fantasize about the ways women allegedly hit the wall and then pay for how they’ve treated them by men who have reached the revenge fantasy they hope exists to punish women, even if it’s not the reality for them. Those would be my top conclusions. But sure some exist irl for sure.

kvakerok_v2 · 2024-08-14T17:59:01+00:00

The whole concept is so dumb.

The people that become successful are that way because they're able to work on themselves and adapt to the environment. By the time they are successful they are so far ahead of whoever hurt them the idea of revenge itself is meaningless. To seek revenge is to regress. Men who are fixated on revenge never get anywhere in life.

I honestly think the revenge idea is peddled by petty women projecting their worldview into men.

SimpleStart2395 · 2024-08-14T18:07:34+00:00

Sounds like something a tik tok influencer would say.

I mean no matter the age you want money I guess right?

TheRealConine · 2024-08-14T18:29:55+00:00

The best revenge is living well.

In that what you mean?

2024-08-14T19:38:36+00:00

No just mentally ill. I started having success (like doing really well on dating apps) around 27. I became super picky and maybe broke a few hearts. It wasn't really my intention.

JetLifeJay22 · 2024-08-14T21:44:55+00:00

Men just mature later is all and find our purpose a little later.

Men have to build into their age a bit more whereas younger women have value already by their beauty (Hence IG and always going on trips and seeming to have a more “Fun” life)

But then you become the guy who can provide the fun and it just happens to be to the 23-25 year old women.

And the cycle repeats…..

Connect-Moment-8007 · 2024-08-14T22:02:57+00:00

What revenge? I guess you could call me chad light. I was modestly successful with women, in my 20s , In the military and college. I did a few tours in Middle East hell holes as a NCO and went to OCS and graduate courses. The change was dramatic. Why were women who would have ignored all but giga chad now interested??? Hmm Oh that’s right I have status, resources, in very good shape, Oh wait thats both AF and BB . Do you really think I want to be one of many ? Do you think I want a woman who doesn’t really desire me ? She magically became interested when I had more status and disposable income???

What rationale person wants that ?

The man who got a skill, education, trade , works hard , has some status and resources . Who was invisible to many women in their party years is not going to see them as anything but a good time if by chance they are still reasonably attractive . They have options especially young attractive women with a low body count.

Why on earth would they want a LTR with a woman who did not give them a chance in their 20s ? Now that they are successful and attractive!! Thats not rational.

You had your opportunity, you chose many Chadwick Thrustins over him each Chadwick had his fun and left you . Now you expect even Chad light to give you a monogamous committed relationship after giving everything to Chadwick Thrustins for free ?

Not gonna happen. You chose poorly . You thought those guys would wait for you . No they are choosing from their options and their options are the younger low count attractive women.

You could have had him and a very good life . You chose to ride the CC . Thats called the consequences of your actions and behaviors.

The man call him Chad light , chose to get a trade, skill , education, invest wisely and build status and resources. He now gets to exercise his options as well. That you don’t like it is not revenge. It is your responsibility.

Though to be fair parents should be teaching their children this before they become adults . I am eternally grateful my still married parents did . I an grateful my sisters were willing to help me .

You bet I was the older brother with the 12 gauge and 00 . Or my still in near perfect condition Lugar. My sisters have great husbands who are very close family with me imagine that .

McTitty3000 · 2024-08-14T22:28:52+00:00

What is this Revenge you're speaking of? Are they serving it cold, that's the best way according to the gourmet chefs

his_purple_majesty · 2024-08-15T01:47:20+00:00

The first girl I dated in my 30s, I remember crying when I broke things off because I felt so bad about potentially hurting her feelings.

Ruin369 · 2024-08-15T02:32:50+00:00

"Revenge" ? As in FOMO?

magat3ars · 2024-08-15T05:31:37+00:00

This is just hs plus. This happens and is understandable bc they haven't aged one bit. They're still haunted by ghosts of bullies and bad people. They want to get back at those back then, but they really can't unless they're lucky. They then take it out on everyone else sadly. Even becomes judge, jury, abd executioner where all wrong doings deserve punishment. Looks at you longer, so you must act shitty now. They might have not looked you in the eyes before or something.

Men and women do this. They just learn the lessons that intimacy bring most people later in life. I believe most people would feel the same way in the same situation. If you don't think so, you can't really say unless you glowed up without resentment.

Plus revenge leads to burnt earth and bridges. You're left alone on a island of misery created by yourself in the end. Revenge isn't sweet it's addictive like sugar. It feels good till you hurt everyone because they didn't care about you. It's a fair summation, but that isn't the way to do it. Work on your mental health and feel okay mentioning it to others. You can even bring this up as your something that hurts you in a friendship. Friends would understand. Even bullies in the past and let that interaction be the last. You're ultimately stronger than them and a better person in totality, but you being bitter will make you worse than them. You know better now and want to sling mud like a kid. They weren't aware enough to know better, and they abused a person with no power or autonomy. Be better than them really. Shit really sucks more than most know

Triglycerine · 2024-08-15T12:05:57+00:00

That's like saying women who reorient themselves after a breakup do so out of revenge

Ashamed-Interest5942 · 2024-08-15T13:26:44+00:00

Guys in their 30s are just as "invisible" as thru were 20s, the whole women prime is when they are young (aka to men most attractive) yet for men their prime is past 30s/when their looks decline. Excuse the whole beta bucks, alpha fucks but the cycle continues the women loses out. Attractive men are rare af and yet society even to this day pressures women to marry to men theyre not sexually attracted too. Its depressing and cruel for both parties, but this whole narrative then men peak later IS MEN COPING. The app is filled w older men and/or men stable in their career, you might see yourself as your salary but its not the equivalent factor men/society says it is.

Feisty_Response_9401 · 2024-08-15T14:45:19+00:00

Not revenge, because when you get to the happier state you want usually there is no resentment left.

But indeed, if you survived into your 30s without meaningful relationships and sex, it makes sense you may want to live the experience you did not live before.

Why should successful pick the fat single moms of your own generation, if now they can pick younger girls with way less baggage? Those women also had their fun choosing the best men.

queefhoarder · 2024-08-15T16:40:04+00:00

I'm a lot more successful than I was in my 20s and tbh it was revenge for shitty people in my life that fueled most of it. One girl that said I'd never be successful and mostly my family that said I was the runt of the family.

Flightlessbirbz · 2024-08-15T19:12:22+00:00

A majority probably are not. Usually when someone is busy enjoying life, they’re not thinking about “revenge.” The revenge thing seems to be more a coping fantasy of guys who are currently struggling.

That being said, I do know that sometimes when people have lost a significant amount of weight or experienced a “glow up” of some kind, they can be a bit cynical about humanity despite enjoying their new quality of life. They see how others treat them so much differently, and it seems shallow because they know how they used to be treated. This is definitely understandable and I wouldn’t say it’s a “revenge” thing necessarily, but could hypothetically result in treating other people more poorly.

wouldbepandananny · 2024-08-15T19:59:00+00:00

Probably not; likely just the "Revenge of the Nerds" trope. I hang out with a lot of dudes who became more successful with dating in their thirties, and are thrilled. They often realize that the insecurities they had as younger men were in their head, and that women have been- more or less- interested in them this entire time, but their self-esteem issues interfered with them recognizing it for what it was.

Involved_Currently · 2024-08-14T13:40:09+00:00

A little bit..

KayRay1994 · 2024-08-14T12:42:15+00:00

I think you’re misunderstanding what the term revenge fantasy here - the idea doesn’t necessarily relate to being successful, but moreso with either being okay with fucking others over or hoping others get fucked over. If you’re not doing any of these things then you’re not acting on revenge, simple as that

Corbast7 · 2024-08-14T16:13:07+00:00

I don’t think anyone thinks that men having a hoe phase in their 30s is “revenge.” People should be able to do whatever they want with their bodies. If men have a glow up later in life and have always wanted to be promiscuous but weren’t able to before, then they should do what they want. Just of course don’t lie to people and pretend that you want commitment when you don’t, obviously.

When I see people refer to the TRP revenge fantasy, they’re talking about when men on here wax poetic about how “all the slutty college girls” or whatever are gonna turn 30 and become miserable and desperate because “no man will commit to a former hoe”, then they’ll come and beg said men for a committed relationship and those men feel the sweet revenge of finally being able to reject those same women who they imagine would have rejected them a decade earlier. Lol.

Realistic-Ad-1023 · 2024-08-14T16:16:24+00:00

We don’t mean that men doing well in their 30s compared to their 20s is a “revenge fantasy.” Or even men who have lots of casual sex in their 30s are seeking their revenge.

Also it isn’t most guys.

When people talk about the “revenge fantasy of men who didn’t do well with women in their 20s” we are specifically talking about the stories here that men tell themselves about women who have lots of casual sex with “chad” in her 20s, but is never chosen by him. So she continues Chad chasing, until she’s 30, “hits the wall” is used up and no one wants her. And when she finally settles for the man who struggled in his 20s, he won’t want her anymore because now he is the one with options. He can turn her down and call her a whore and dictate her worth on the dating market. He can pump and dump a woman looking to settle down, because he has this image in his head that she wouldn’t have wanted him when they were in their 20s. And now he can waste the last few of her childbearing years because he feels like women made him lose out on his 20s.

It’s of course, nothing but fiction. It’s not how real life works. All women aren’t chasing Chad and all men are not struggling to date anyone. Most people end up in happy relationships. The few men who struggle that bad will continue to struggle without finding the actual root of their issues. They might find a good girl who has had sex in the past but likes him, and he’ll use her to make himself feel better. Making himself just as lonely as he was previously. But that’s a minority. Most people just want a decent relationship with someone they’re compatible with. That’s it.

Upset_Material_3372 · 2024-08-14T20:12:01+00:00

I sure hope so, women certainly deserve it for what they continue to do to men to even end up like that.

sprckets21 · 2024-08-14T20:40:21+00:00

Kinda because its a realization of how close you were to getting lots of girls easily and you just figured it out later in life by trial and error. If one thing is off about you, or your life isn't in perfect order, girls won't randomly get with you basically ever. Which sucks, and makes you hate women in a way because they only want to casually get with very specific guys.

yourfavoriteblackguy · 2024-08-14T23:50:09+00:00

Its not about Revenge, but if the SAME women didn't want me back then, they don't really want me now. They want the accumulation of resources and status that I now have while offering nothing in return. I mean a lot of these women who circle back can't even offer the bare minimum of fake attention when someone is talking.

Difficult_Falcon1022 · 2024-08-14T14:47:36+00:00

If I got slightly dicked around by a man and it turned out to be because he was feeling revenge on womankind because a girl he fancied ten years ago turned him down I would be LAUGHING til the cows come home.

As always the best revenge is a life well lived. Spending your time trying to one up someone who hurt you is a waste of your own time.

Nellylocheadbean · 2024-08-14T12:46:47+00:00

No, I would assume normal well adjusted men would be happy and just continue live life.

A lot of these men have weird revenge fantasies because they’re miserable, hateful & depressed. They shouldn’t be taken seriously.

It wouldn’t even make sense to have revenge, revenge against who? That implies it’s someone else’s fault that you were unsuccessful dating in your teens or 20s.

Sharp_Engineering379 · 2024-08-14T13:13:01+00:00

It’s just grift. Manosphere influencers keep naive and inexperienced men on the hook and nursing at the grifter teat by promising them Big Success with women sometime in the future, so long as they continue to like and subscribe, and pay for this and that content.

If a man allows himself to be swayed by this fantasy and postpones the beginning of his life by waiting and waiting until he achieves a six pack and a six figure salary, he’s going to be bald, wrinkled, and socially awkward from two decades of taking himself out of the game.

Gravel_Roads · 2024-08-14T12:57:13+00:00

Nah, the dudes who "found success" tend to pretty proud of themselves and all their hardwork and, like you, they just want to reap the rewards of their labor and growth and actually have fun being liked and having friends and partners.

fuyasurieki · 2024-08-14T23:02:10+00:00

I just think hetero males are wired this way. I'm Asexual and was very successful with Asian and Middle Eastern girls. Later, latino then, black. At all age ranges, hetero guys were jackassess. When we'd compare game they were all into revenge. Example: "no bitches wanted my flowers or Valentine's when I was 10 so I shit on bitches when I'm 16."

reignoferror00 · 2024-08-14T15:58:30+00:00

Success is relative. From being a complete and utter failure to getting a tiny bit of success once in a while for a relatively short period, I suppose is a minor success. A small step towards not being completely behind the 8 ball. Revenge? I had and have neither the ability or desire for that? I just wish I had some good friend/acquaintance groups back then; on second thought even some mediocre ones.

Teens to mid 20's was a wasteland. After that there was only 3 relationships and maybe a couple handfuls of one night stands vs the very high number of wasted nights at the bar and too often sausage fest parties.

Do I still have some bitterness, resentment, and felt like I missed out? Did any positive experiences and hands on learning happen at a later age than was beneficial? Hell yes. In my late 20's and early 30's I was just mostly content with any success with woman and had the fear (rightly so) of fucking it up. I won't bother going into my current situation in my mid 50's other than to say it isn't good.

MyUpSeemsDown · 2024-08-15T02:35:30+00:00

Well hopefully guys who are in their 30's are grown up to realize whatever experience or lack thereof isn't actually every women's or anyone for that matter aside from very specific people in their past life.

Title	Are guys who have more success in their 30s actually out for revenge like some narratives here suggest?
Author	harmonica2
Upvotes	43
Comments	450
Date	August 14, 2024 12:10 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1erzyf4/are_guys_who_have_more_success_in_their_30s/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/are-guys-who-have-more-success-in-their-30s.1527258 https://theredarchive.com/post/1527258

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