30 year old women hitting the wall and regretting things won’t change anything for men.

bluestjuice · 2025-11-06T20:52:38+00:00

I was always under the impression that the ‘best outcome’ for men from the wall concept was that young women in their 20s would internalize it, be wary of losing whatever advantage their youthful good looks grants them, and alter their behavior in their 20s to more closely match what they expected to want once they got a little older — which is to say, that young women in their 20s who want to eventually settle down and get married would work seriously on that project right out the gate, instead of spending time prioritizing studies, having fun, or doing anything other than trying to locate and lock down the man they want.

Leaving aside the question of whether young women are actually likely to internalize the concept and change their behavior accordingly — I question whether the prospective change in behavior would even end up with significantly different results from a male perspective. If we assume that the absolute hottest men are still not interested in marrying or pairing off exclusively while young, I think what you’d mainly see is a lot of young women trying harder to get them to do so anyway, as well as some young women shifting to a more ‘realistic’ strategy and doing whatever settling they consider reasonable, earlier. Young adults are prone to optimism and I don’t think any of this would end up impacting the least-sought-after men that much. I don’t think this would have very much impact on women who can’t find a man that suits their standards and opt to stay single instead. And there would still be a cohort of young women who are not interested in settling down and getting married ever, and continue on as they currently do.

leosandlattes · 2025-11-06T15:14:30+00:00

It is not supposed to change anything for men! The concept of the wall and subsequently af/bb is that is so men can be mindful of the choice they make in who to date.

The red pill was never for unattractive, ugly, autistic men. It was for average guys and up, the kind of guy who might look plain or 'just there' but could still get play with some effort. So it's warning those men to stay away from women who would not have wanted him if she didn't have a kid to take care of or something like that.

30 years-old is not the wall. It's dependent woman to woman.

EugeneCezanne · 2025-11-06T16:55:06+00:00

Without buying into "the wall" or an arbitrary age cap, I do believe that most people broaden their range of potential physical attraction as they get older. At the same time, their range of non-physical attraction gets more narrow. Essentially, we become less picky about looks and more picky about everything else, just as a natural byproduct of experience and maturity.

harmonica2 · 2025-11-06T14:46:46+00:00

When it comes to the notion that women aren't settling in their prime and are settling too late, aren't guys guilty of this too, or do most guys want to settle earlier than don't get the chance?

PurplePillDebate-ModTeam · 2025-11-06T14:14:46+00:00

[permanently deleted]

LillthOfBabylon · 2025-11-06T14:23:30+00:00

30-year-old women don’t hit the wall unless she has had a really rough time through life, such as drugs. Even if 30-year-old women have lower look standards, they would have higher income standards.

OkShame3452 · 2025-11-06T22:49:08+00:00

I am sorry but it's not true. She will adjust her options. She'll do it subconciously after assesing her own power, SMV.

She will automatically discard men too attractive for her, as she knows she won't have power over them.

Jazzlike-Lifeguard38 · 2025-11-06T14:46:19+00:00

Are you trying to argue that aging doesn’t change one’s priorities?

SexCrispies · 2025-11-06T14:30:45+00:00

People of all attractiveness levels have sex with their partners. Having a partner or not is not predicted by attractiveness level. Anyone can get a partner and have sex with them. Age doesn't matter.

Notoriouslothario · 2025-11-06T17:11:02+00:00

As a man, I never knew what it meant to be "post wall." Has she expired? What does this phrase really even mean?

MarioWilson122 · 2025-11-06T17:56:24+00:00

Well it does for some men if she is looking for a provider now. She might date down to find that if the more attractive guys are unwilling. So it is possible but not the best position to be in as a man.

Sholnufff · 2025-11-06T18:02:26+00:00

I've had multiple women in their 30's try to spin the block with me when I was interested in high school but they weren't.

Some of them I ended up fooling around with but nothing more because of distance (4.5 hours away).

PurplePillDebate-ModTeam · 2025-11-06T15:03:36+00:00

[permanently deleted]

this-is-very · 2025-11-06T20:27:10+00:00

Not RP, but if your "smv" is down and you are on the market indeed, you will be more likely consider lower tier men. It's that simple.

Educational_Middle57 · 2025-11-06T21:24:28+00:00

On the contrary, it will make women meaner.

Fancy-Scallion-6682 · 2025-11-07T15:58:05+00:00

This I agree with. Men should not wait for women to "hit the wall" or whatever, instead they should save up money for plastic surgery like I'm doing rn.

kvakerok_v2 · 2025-11-06T15:12:40+00:00

The latest Pew research data shows that the mean of US women's wall falls somewhere between 40 and 55 years. Which frankly tracks with the whole "whore until I can't have kids no more, then freeze my eggs" modus operandi you see pushed on tiktok brain rot channels.

As a Chadlite who did get to have sex with them in their prime, you didn't miss much. Pretty women don't get smarter at all between 18 and 44, there's no reason for them to do that. That's also number 1 reason why the whole talk about age gap relationships is complete bullshit.

BobtheArcher2018 · 2025-11-06T15:20:15+00:00

The wall just means a sudden negative change in the slope of women's raw attractiveness to men; one that is different than you'd see on a chart of men's attractiveness to women.

It's still a thing, but in a modern world, the Wall happens later and the slope change is not as steep. Less sun damage and outside manual work. Better cosmetics. Etc.

And how the Wall actually manifests is highly mediated by culture. If women are not going to mate with much older men, then women aren't competing much with younger women. So your competition is going through whatever Wall there is together, greatly mitigating the impact.

AreOut · 2025-11-06T14:51:36+00:00

hitting the wall doesn't mean having no options, but less options

also if men work on themselves they will improve over time and get more options in their 30s than in their 20s, so it sometimes happens that a woman he was interested in while they were in their 20s gradually becomes unattractive to him

TonytheNetworker · 2025-11-06T15:31:25+00:00

Men were sold a dream…. It’s that simple. Lots of nerds or alternative guys thinking once they make 100k+ at 34 and have an established life they’ll be flooded with dating opportunities. Women don’t suddenly change their requirements or preferences, as we like to say. They still want a 6’4 man that towers over them. They still want a man that’s a millionaire. They still want a great jawline and lean muscular build. You really think after 15 years of getting bent over, shaking ass on a yatch, getting flown out and once she hits 30 that’s all supposed to stop!? 🤣🤣

Turbulent_Mix_318 · 2025-11-08T14:15:20+00:00

The wall is a red pill cope. It doesnt exist. And especially not at thirty. What does happen is that the marketplace the gap in the market value between the average man and woman somewhat reduces but its still undeniable.

Primary_Mechanic_565 · 2025-11-06T14:21:09+00:00

30 isnt the "wall".

I'd argue the "wall" is after they've had kids.

InterestingGoose5507 · 2025-11-06T14:15:19+00:00

This is exactly the RP point! If you’re not in the 20%, she will only want to be with you for the WRONG REASONS which usually equates to resources. This only happens post epiphany phase (30+).

The point is women can sleep up out of their league but generally not date out of league (a 50% on the female attractiveness distribution can sleep with a guy in the top 10% but he’ll never commit to her). So they spend their 20s having fun with Chad & Tyrone before going to look for Billy Beta, the guy that’s ok, probably her looksmatch and won’t cheat on her and has a great career sorted so can provider for her and her children.

This is an ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE deal for any man in that position. She will likely want you to wait for sex, despite having hooked up in her prime years and prove yourself. She is very likely to divorce as you’re not really attractive to her as soon as she has had kids, the house and alimony guaranteed.

Best option to deal with women with a casual history is to keep the relationship casual and only go further if they show genuine burning desire (jump into bed with you quickly). It’s still a superior option to meet a conservative girl that maybe had 2-4 boyfriends and only had sex in relationships (to lower cheating risk) as women have near unlimited options for casual sex.

catdog8020 · 2025-11-06T20:51:15+00:00

We don’t want an old car that has a lot of miles on it. We sure ain’t gonna pay the price for a new car on a car that’s been used up in races and smash up derby’s.

Knight-Bishop · 2025-11-06T21:36:44+00:00

Women’s mating strategy is simple: their goal Is to get men to accept leftovers; and for men to not understand/care that they are receiving leftovers.

“Revenge fantasies”….nah.

How many times does the concept of the Wall have to be explained to you ladies in here?

It isn’t just about a broad losing her looks.

And no, men don’t have to “accept” anything. The shaming ain’t working. Try a new play. Men won’t be raising your 7 bastard kids; go back to your baby Daddy & fix the relationship.

PurplePillDebate-ModTeam · 2025-11-06T14:22:20+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Redditcritic6666 · 2025-11-06T16:37:28+00:00

well 1) The wall really isn't a particular age... a) people age different and there are young looking women in their 30 and there are people that look old before they even hit their 30s. Its genetics and lifestyle habits such as not getting enough sleep, smoking, drug use, etc.

2) Attraction can be more then physical. A kind hearted women who treat her men right, loyal, and understand that relationship is both a give and take will be desired by men at any age.

Even if your wildest revenge fantasy came true it still wouldn't change anything for you. You still didn't get to have sex with her in her prime and since you don't want her now (because she is post wall) you dont get to have sex with her now.

True but i believe the theory about the wall is more from that women's perspective. So a women who hit the wall (basically lose their physical attraction when their physical attraction is their only positive quality) would just find themselves not drawing men anymore.

Men has always been told to go their own way and improve themselves to attract women, not to go scrape at the bottom of the barrel.

James_M_Croft · 2025-11-06T17:15:42+00:00

Getting rid of the detriments is a benefit.

The fact that she lost the primary thing giving her power to create detriments to everyone (pretty privilege) is a benefit.

We live in a society. One less hindrance is always a win. And is a great inspiration for future generations.

N_Count_Council · 2025-11-06T20:37:02+00:00

But what if we're physically attractive in our 20s and even more physically attractive in our 30s?

Now our opinion matters I guess because we're the ones you want to fuck/date/marry

berichorbeburied · 2025-11-06T14:49:59+00:00

It will change things. If men stop committing to older 30 year old women

It doesn’t matter if men have sex with women older 30z it’s really the commitment and starting a relationship part and being exclusive part that matters

On another note. What a man should do is just focus on the sexually attractive women. That’s what’s worth it

All of this arguing and hatred and frustration is usually for women who are unattractive or women that are ok or will do or that you’re settling for. Or willing to try with

That’s what this over 30 year old women thing really is about

It’s supposed to impart wisdom to men

It’s not supposed to hurt women

DietTyrone · 2025-11-06T14:18:17+00:00

If she's still single and childless at this point, she may be more likely to settle for a "good man." While in her early 20's she wasn't in a hurry to pair up with such men, and had time to waste hooking up with the hottest fukbois she could find. So, that much changed.

But it's not necessarily a good change for the men who have no interest in being Betabuxxed. And like you said, if these men weren't her preference back then, they likely aren't her preference currently. She's just looking for a "good man" on paper, and has accepted that the men she found more sexually satisfying in the past can't/won't serve that role for her, but beta Billy certainly can.

TermAggravating8043 · 2025-11-06T14:37:12+00:00

They don’t want to change old woman who “had their chance” This fantasy is a warning to younger woman about “look how you might end up, if you don’t date me and settle while your in your prime”

AutoModerator · 2025-11-06T13:57:38+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "Debate" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

AutoModerator · 2025-11-06T13:57:39+00:00

Hi OP,

You've chosen to identify your thread as a Debate. As such you are expected to actively engage in your own thread with a mind open to being changed. PPD has guidelines for what that involves.

OPs author must genuinely hold the position and you must be open to having your view challenged.

An unwillingness to debate in good faith may be inferred from one or several of the following:

Ignoring the main point of a comment, especially to point out some minor inconsistency;

Refusing to make concessions that an alternate view has merit;

Focusing only on the weaker arguments;

Only having discussions with users who agree with your position.

Failure to keep to this higher standard (we only apply to Debate OPs) may result in deletion of the whole thread.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

Erdenaxela1997 · 2025-11-06T15:11:14+00:00

Beta Bux

Turbulent-Company373 · 2025-11-06T15:48:19+00:00

Is this some kind of sexual tease where all one can do is only look at them like most online ones?

I am thankful that there isn't someone who I wanted to have sex with badly who had rejected me.

Far_Secret_2710 · 2025-11-08T01:19:15+00:00

I agree. Every girl that hits the wall is replaced by another hitting legal age. The cycle may eventually correct as demographics continue to shift, but that could take decades. Resentment isn’t productive, and ultimately it reduces and softens a man. It also makes him more likely to hit his wall of having no career, no wealth, no fitness, no love or family or even time left before the grave.

Snoo71180 · 2025-11-11T09:04:42+00:00

Love this debate question because the answer is so simple. While I'm not a die hard "hitting the wall" believer the statistics & dating app world would have us all believe that 80% of women believe they are high value enough to be with a top tier man (say 20% or even 10% of men). That math doesn't work, and never has. Let's repeat that........it isn't possible for 80% of women to be with the top 10-20% of men.

However the dating apps and social media companies are laughing all the way to the bank manipulating the worst parts of the human psyche, and physiology, because that's their business model. Literally the dating world, if you date online or use dating apps, is a money maker more so than reality.

wtknight · 2025-11-06T15:08:36+00:00

If average 30 year old women want relationships, then they’ll have to date average 30 year old men and, yes, have sex with them, which is why surveys show that most older men have sex. Even most younger men have sex. The men who are not having sex are not average but below average men, and even many of them have sex once they are older due to being late bloomers.

notthe1butthe2 · 2025-11-06T21:38:30+00:00

When women bash men on their appearance i find it hilarious, because it’s clearly projection.

Men get told they’re ugly and not attractive as women their entire lives, pre wall, post wall, under the wall whatever. Your average man doesn’t compete with a woman’s attractive attributes. Most men know inherently their value comes from what they have the potential of doing.

Men hit the wall at like 65, when their earning potential has come down dramatically, and their ability to protect, build, and provide is lessened because of age.

Whereas a woman’s ability to procreate (by a large her main value) plummets at 35.

Is there a wall for both genders, sure, but saying a man isn’t as attractive at 50 as he was at 25 is… obvious. His value never was about his looks in the first place.

Birds making fun of fish because they can’t fly is the most pea brain argument ever.

Icy-Gene7565 · 2025-11-07T01:30:30+00:00

Funny story about this topic.

In the 80s in gr8 to 11 i rarely dated girls in school. Until a girl none of them knew flirted with me and overnight I blew up.

That's ridiculous. I'm an attractive guy, captain of the school wrestling team, 6 ft., no hump and I have my forklift license.

But women can be shameless.

jay10033 · 2025-11-06T14:48:12+00:00

Of course it won't. But she will find that her resources are not sufficient to support her lifestyle generally or even her retirement, so she will seek out a simp willing to underwrite her until 1) she gets lucky or 2) sufficiently has used the legal system to buttress her financial security and then leave. She begins to give the unattracteds a second look.

Ok_Ask6327 · 2025-11-07T05:58:00+00:00

A 30 year old woman is not "past her prime". She is just a fully grown woman both psychologically and physically. Meaning that she is not easy to manipulate and she no longer has child like features.

The only men who think like this are predatory, and somewhat podophilic. They want someone that they can control.

PrecisionHat · 2025-11-06T19:45:51+00:00

The wall refers to relationships and commitment, not sex. Men will still have sex with women over 30. They just won't settle down with them as readily.

GhostXmasPast342 · 2025-11-06T15:07:46+00:00

The friendzone is eternal.

Right_Teaching_8193 · 2025-11-07T01:24:59+00:00

You forget a lot of men are predators and use power or $ to get w a girl in or well before her prime

No_Personality5381 · 2025-11-06T15:15:39+00:00

Face it , late 30s is the wall. Prime prime getting swooped up by your prince Romeo is still going to be 18-25 , that’s why men need to save save work work invest and be their most powerful if they can’t find relationships or anything going for them. At 50+ you can get those young chicks so long as you stay healthy or are INSANELY rich 🤑 . Say what you will, eat sleep reproduce repeat is our goal men/women alike. Them being told they are independent is another issue they will face, not issue just a separate life path. But I’m feeling shakey economy wise so if you want 0 children so be it , find your partner whenever , be a good person . Less competition for those of us who WANT to continue their bloodline .

James_M_Croft · 2025-11-06T17:06:51+00:00

It is because you are not thinking deeply enough.

Stripping the annoyances from the power to hinder you is a benefit

Feminists, communists and other Capitalist slaves are only not being constantly booed out of public life because they can fuck powerful old white men in a capitalist society, but with age, they don't have as much power anymore because they don't want older women, meaning men of all ages are a bit freer from their horrible presence and behaviors.

2. Feminist failures are a great "what not to do" example.

Today, everyone had horrible experiences from having to deal with feminists and other slaves of capital or has listened to the multitudes that regretted it. That is why there never been a more based gen than the new generations, there are way more antifeminists women than ever before, and very few "on the wall" women. Meaning, there are some women who are good out there, after so many years, there are examples of women who are not some horrible parasite anymore. It is a good example to give young boys and girls.

3. Failed feminists tend to learn they are hated and go away on their own.

One of the primary orders that capitalist pigs gave to feminists was "cut contact with those who disagree with you" And as the wall creeps it, and feminists suffer more and more from having horrible personalities, they slowly but surely create a self imposed ostracization. Meaning again, men are freer from their negative behavior.

I don't know how to put it for you, but well, these women were never really "liked" people just wanted sex with them. So anything that gets these disgusting people slightly less to be in your life is a win.

NoDanaOnlyZuuI · 2025-11-06T17:38:44+00:00

“Hitting the wall”

There’s no wall. It’s a door, and women are the ones closing it and walking through while men stand there complaining about it.

Wide-Illustrator2906 · 2025-11-06T21:17:42+00:00

🤔I can't believe I'm actually agreeing with you Op but where you go wrong is in thinking these men are happy with that outcome . That's not the case, they are miserable because they have been looked over, the only difference is now women 30+ are being looked over as well. They basically don't want to suffer alone.

giveuporfindaway · 2025-11-06T21:30:09+00:00

Men care about fertility. It's possible for a woman to be younger and less attractive and this is satisfactory for most men.

No_Teacher_3313 · 2025-11-06T20:24:59+00:00

There really isn’t any wall. And there are always previously partnered guys becoming single and available at all ages.

Title	30 year old women hitting the wall and regretting things won’t change anything for men.
Author	Jazzlike-Lifeguard38
Upvotes	109
Comments	416
Date	November 6, 2025 1:57 PM UTC (8 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1opzlyy/30_year_old_women_hitting_the_wall_and_regretting/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/30-year-old-women-hitting-the-wall-and-regretting.1565857 https://theredarchive.com/post/1565857

Comments