Men are looking for casual sex and fwbs whether you want to hear it or not.

Digimobster95 · 2023-11-19T18:06:15+00:00

You posted on a nsfw subreddit offering hook ups to thirsty dudes, idk what you were expecting to happen. What you’re doing is confirmation bias

JadedButWicked · 2023-11-19T20:11:04+00:00

"I posted in a porn subreddit and 1000 guys wanted to have sex therefore I know all men just want sex".

Serious question, do you have a mental disorder?

Imagine if a man said "I went to the strip club and all the women wanted to have money therefore all women are gold diggers".

Enflamed-Pancake · 2023-11-19T18:30:05+00:00

You posted in a NSFW group and want to pretend that the behaviour of men in that group is representative of men in their entirety. How can you be sure that your sample is representative?

januaryphilosopher · 2023-11-19T18:06:14+00:00

Some men are, but the blanket statement isn't true. Many do actually want a relationship, it just isn't all or even most in certain groups (for example young men).

modidlee · 2023-11-20T11:02:22+00:00

You’re posting in nsfw Reddit groups and you’re surprised scumbags are reaching out to you? There’s going to be a higher concentration of guys like that in a group like that.

Toxic_LigmaMale · 2023-11-19T19:25:38+00:00

I can only speak for myself. But I wanted something long term from every woman I was with in my younger, idealistic days. I didn’t start “fucking first, and seeing what happens later” until I had been used and manipulated for a while. But I was never closed off to the idea of a relationship until I got older.

Dstar538888 · 2023-11-20T00:21:37+00:00

That’s great for them, but that still doesn’t mean it’s anyone’s responsibility to oblige them with that, so good luck to them 🤷🏽‍♀️ if all they’re looking for is sex, then they can’t complain about how hard it is for them to find a girl that’s willing… the dating market is oversaturated with dick and we are constantly being inundated with sex offers from random ass men, so if I were just looking for a hookup, why would I scrape from the bottom when I don’t have to?? This is where you get all these mid sexually frustrated males complaining about women only sleeping with Chads, if she’s just trying to hook up and she has a choice between Charismatic Chad vs. Mid Martin what is the incentive behind picking Mid Martin?? 🌝

But same I’ve lost count of the number of men trying to sleep with me when they didn’t even verify if my account was even real or not, they’re really desperate 🤣

Electronic_West_1831 · 2023-11-19T18:09:20+00:00

If you’re posting in NSFW groups then you’re obviously going to get attention from men who are looking for a hookup - that’s a very specific demographic and doesn’t represent all men

armpitpics · 2023-11-19T19:42:27+00:00

NSFW groups attract people looking for sex or open to it. If you post on these sort of groups you'll eventually end up interacting with men looking for sex, whether it's the majority of them of not. I get the impression that you take this interactions personally and see them as offensive. You shouldn't. You should just accept that some men are interested in casual sex and ignore them if you're not interested in interacting with them further.

SpitFireSpear · 2023-11-19T18:29:00+00:00

You are on NSFW sites, that attracts a certain audience, don’t you think?

Cat_Lover259 · 2023-11-19T20:20:22+00:00

One peek through your profile is enough to know you should not be taken seriously in any capacity.

Alarming_Ask_244 · 2023-11-19T20:34:14+00:00

You can't walk into a bar, look around at everyone drinking, and conclude that most people *outside the bar* are alcoholics.

gntlbastard · 2023-11-19T18:00:40+00:00

Men are looking for casual sex and fwb with women who have nothing more to offer outside the bedroom. Women control access to sex so any casual sex and fwb exist only because a woman decided to participate in that. You want to be treated more than a booty call then enforce your part.

63daddy · 2023-11-19T18:04:33+00:00

If you want to meet men interested in actual romantic relationships you should consider actual dating sites like eHarmony rather than NSFW sites.

EmbarrassedClient283 · 2023-11-19T20:48:45+00:00

So what exactly are you telling us, that men who complain that they are unable to get a date let alone a relationship, are secretly denying women because they are after casual sex only?

Spare-Estimate5596 · 2023-11-20T01:40:00+00:00

We never said that men dont do that. We said if you got 100 messages a week. At least 40 of those messages are men looking for a relationship and 20 of the messages are men that would marry you in a few months.

Compared to men. We are lucky if we get 10 messages a year.

projecteddesperation · 2023-11-19T19:06:29+00:00

Men tend to be more willing than women to have sex with a stranger and it’s not just a matter of safety issues, pregnancy concerns, stigma, disease avoidance, or self-control.

However, that’s willingness, not preference. Just because I would be down to have sex with an extremely attractive random woman doesn’t mean that’s what I want long term.

Growing up, I thought I wanted casual sex because it seemed so rare and hard to get and, thus, seemingly valuable. This phenomenon is called perceived scarcity. Thanks to some women out there with realistic standards for men, however, I was able to experience and explore casual sex. I invited an attractive random woman over one time for sex and it was… mediocre. We had no chemistry. I started going for more chemistry and FWBships but it would hurt when it ended. I discovered that I wanted a relationship.

If women just pathologize casual sex or explore sex with vastly different standards than for a relationship, it creates perceived scarcity for sex and causes men to fixate on obtaining it. For me, having access to casual sex gave me a chance to explore and mature out of that phase, want and appreciate a relationship, and actually get on the same page as women in wanting a relationship.

macone235 · 2023-11-19T18:26:41+00:00

I have posted content (I do specify that I’m not looking for hookups) in some NSFW groups. The amount of messages I get from men wanting to fuck that night or become a fwb is astronomical

What a great example of women logic. *Looks for nice man who wants to commit to them - also looks for them in a group of deviants.

No one here ever made the argument that every man, or even most men are looking for a committed lifetime partnership. They're simply stating that there is a large group of these men that are typically ignored, especially until they get older.

Teflon08191 · 2023-11-19T18:59:02+00:00

I do specify that I’m not looking for hookups

You have to understand that the reason men never take this statement seriously is because every woman says it. Including the ones who are open to hookups.

they just automatically assume I will fuck them just because they asked.

They assume you'll fuck them because you posted NSFW content, which in addition to being a fairly reliable indicator that she's more open to hookups than women who don't post NSFW content, is a common strategy prostitutes use to low-key advertise their "services".

soupmastwr · 2023-11-19T18:49:45+00:00

OP this is the problem with this sub is that it doesn't really understand the problem of modern relationships. Hook up culture is what is influencing the behaviors and attitudes of both men and women. I agree some men here do want to hook up with women but are jealous of those who do but there are men like me here who are critical of hook up culture.

SupposedlySapiens · 2023-11-19T18:52:17+00:00

It’s the Madonna-Whore Complex.

Most men desire a monogamous relationship with the “Madonna” archetype - demure, devoted, pure, virginal, etc. For me at least, I have zero desire to have sex with those kinds of women unless we establish an emotional connection first. I want to develop a true and deep connection with that type of woman. The sex is really the icing on the cake.

However, the flip side is the Whore - and do I really need to list any adjectives? The Whore presents herself in a certain way and thus provokes a certain reaction in most men. A man can be wholly focused on finding his Madonna mate, while still being open to occasional distractions with Whores. This is why you’re seeing all these “innocent” men sending you dirty messages. They genuinely do want an LTR with a woman, just not the type of woman you’re presenting yourself as.

I would sum it up thusly: act like a Whore, get treated like a Whore

strokesfan1998 · 2023-11-19T19:29:29+00:00

listen I get the sentiment and I do think you’re mostly right. But also, we can’t help how other people see us. Is it bad that men can’t respect women? Of course. Ideally you’d be able to post whatever wherever and be totally fine. Sadly, that’s just not how reddit and the world works. It’s great you found your partner and he’s respected you and your kink. Not everyone will be like that which is why it’s extra special when we find people who respect us for us

bifewova234 · 2023-11-19T20:18:33+00:00

"stop acting like all guys are innocent a d want a little virgin trad woman to marry and have kids" - Who is acting like that?

meteorness123 · 2023-11-19T20:48:03+00:00

Attachment trauma manifests itself in several ways, including the reluctance to commitment.

Secure-Ad-421 · 2023-11-19T20:48:59+00:00

I think there are a few things going on here.

You are correct that, given the option, many men would take a NSA fuck.
You are posting content that (presumably) arouses people in NSFW subreddits, and because this is reddit, people can send messages to you directly. For men sending you messages, there's not much risk there and high reward- getting to fuck someone that *a lot of other people* think is hot. The primary driver of mate selection for many guys.
People who have more negative outlooks on their dating prospects would have casual sex but they do not believe it is accessible to them and therefore settle for being a relationship guy. If sex and dating came easy to them, they would be looking for casual sex and fwbs.

avi150 · 2023-11-19T21:49:55+00:00

Most men would be open to casual sex, yeah. We’re hornier and it’s relatively faster to get aroused. That doesn’t mean they don’t want a relationship instead, though, it just means if the opportunity to have sex comes up most men will jump at it. Also a symptom of us being touch and what I like to call positive-attention-starved.

DeepHouseDJ007 · 2023-11-20T00:38:48+00:00

Can you post the messages from thirsty dudes on r/creepypms? I’m sure a lot of them are hysterical.

Nihi1986 · 2023-11-20T02:38:45+00:00

How ironic...being a man, last week I got dumped by the girl I was sleeping with cause I wanted something serious and she didn't...she now ignores me but texts me pointless stuff every other day just to mess up with my emotions even more, I guess. Made the mistake on jumping back to the market to see if that would help me forget her. Got asked by the next girl if I would be ok with an open relationship...

Look, plenty of guys prefer LTR, plenty of guys catch feelings too and don't want to be hurt.

I could get casual sex, met some low self esteem women willing to provide It, but I also feel like I'd hurt them since they clearly had the hopes it could evolve into LTR...so no, not for me. I'm not even religious or particularly conservative, I just want to be happy with someone I can trust and feel attracted to.

The first girl was supposed to be ideal, she was beautiful and fit and was ok with being casuals, she suggested it...I thought it would be perfect for me at that point and once again I quickly caught feelings.

How many men are aromantic or have a minimun of emotional responsibility? That would solve our doubts. I think many men in fwb/casual are just settling for that but would rather have a real relationship.

TurboBanned · 2023-11-20T18:47:08+00:00

Not exactly disagreeing with you here.

The thing is if every man could we would ALL be having Harem's, i bet money on that, ESPECIALLY the younger ones.

However most men have literally negative value in the eyes of women, so men SETTLE with a girl because can't be a TurboChad, so AT LEAST they want this singular woman to not have been ran through or possibly even a virgin.

It's not their first choice...

uterine_blackmail · 2023-11-20T19:49:37+00:00

One of the best lessons I have learned in my life is that men lie, even to themselves. Sometimes they do it innocently, sometimes they do it maliciously. Men say A and they mean B. Men say they want a loyal, sweet, docile woman, but that is a lie.

Proudvow · 2023-11-19T19:15:05+00:00

Most men who are looking for relationships aren't in NSFW groups at all.

Electrical_Coat_8714 · 2023-11-19T18:09:03+00:00

Nah I want an ltr but FWB is easier on the mind.

I've never sent a DM to a girl on reddit except for the one girl who wanted to do a survey

And I definitely wouldn't want a woman who's body everyone has already seen, even for the night.

The reason they just ask "want sum fuck" is because there's no use putting effort into scraps, either she says yes, or she says no and they let her know how they really feel

dmatthews021120 · 2023-11-19T18:27:39+00:00

Easy way to solve this whole thing and close this thread up.

Men are looking for:

*casual sex

*fwb

*a little virgin trad woman to marry and have kids

Most men are looking for all of these, in whatever quantity they can get for the first two and whatever quality they can get for the last one.

Men with low-tier sexual market value acknowledge they can't get the first two and assume they are at least entitled to the third by bypassing the first two bullets, and when they can't even get the third, and that's some of the incel / MGTOW style lashing out you see.

Signed,

An honest man.

politicsthrowaway230 · 2023-11-19T18:11:43+00:00

first you say you're arguing against the average guy wanting that, then you identify a lot that do, then you conclude "so stop acting like all guys do that". It just shows that talking about "men want x", "women want y" you get garbage in and garbage out.

Any statement like that can be met with millions of counterexamples, and the response will always be "I didn't mean all men, just a lot of men", and that's completely thought-terminating because how do you respond to that? Not worth the time of day. People don't actually believe half of what they say on places like this anyway.

Many men actively seek partners, many look for casual sex, many are users of women, many treat women reasonably well, probably most just live their lives until someone nice comes along without fussing an inordinate amount about their singleness. There are thousands of men in any given city so this should not be confusing at all.

Mobrowncheeks · 2023-11-19T18:46:06+00:00

Why do you think that men who are on Reddit dming random internet women are the same men being defended about seeking relationships?

OtPayOkerSmay · 2023-11-19T18:36:20+00:00

On the contrary, I would say the majority of men are actually interested in relationships; but it is women who deny this and offer FWB arrangements instead - which men accept because hey it's no strings attached sex. There is that small subset of men that just want sex from women (the playboys), and you are painting the rest of men with a very broad brush based on this small subset of men. They are just doing what women do: entertaining many options at a time and picking the best suitor of the bunch.

Men are builders - we want to invest in things that will return dividends - put our eggs in one basket, if you will. It's generally women that want to place their eggs in various baskets because they have so many potential suitors, and most men just have to accept this and play along.

The kicker is that lots of men see that women are pursuing guys who aren't committing, so they feel the pressure to become a player who only wants sex. It's a damaging thing for both sexes that this is happening, but what can you do?

Taicho_Gato · 2023-11-19T18:15:15+00:00

Men want to pay the lowest price possible to acquire sex

Women want to obtain the highest value for the lowest price possible to acquire relationships

You specifying that you're interested in a romantic commitment but not immediately sex is the functional equivalent of men specifying he's interested in sex but not immediately a commitment.

Now I'm not necessarily disagreeing with you but I do think it's important to understand this very basic concept.

For men 'game' is acting like you are interested in more than sex. The men who appeal directly for it tend to fall into the category you described, desperate/ emotionally unattractive.

For women the game appears to be to sus out which guys are playing games and which are legit while also being emotionally validated (filling up the friendship bucket) and chemically attracted (filling up the chemistry bucket).

I don't envy your task, wading through the horny masses to try to find a diamond in the rough, however, what I will say is that you are what you practice, and there's a significant population of otherwise attractive and eligible bachelorettes who spent their physical prime filling up the dopamine buckets instead of trying to learn the rules of and beat the game. Whether that be intentional or passive makes no difference. If you're going to buck the Patriarchy you have to take on the responsibility gap that was left behind.

Granted I have nearly zero sympathy for the guys petitioning for sex overtly/ in exchange for the minimum possible commitment, but I would be interested to hear where and how these thousand(s) of dms came about, I'm guessing you didn't meet 1000 guys at church haranguing you to let them roleplay exxon and you be an oil-rich shale deposit ripe for the fracking

Zabadoodude · 2023-11-19T18:52:31+00:00

This should be used in textbooks as an example of confirmation bias.

The men that want a relationship and find it won't be looking anymore while the relationship lasts. The men that want a hookup will be looking for the next hookup the day after he finds one, so they get vastly overrepresented in all dating spaces.

Most men don't want a relationship with women that post NSFW content online, but guys that just want hookups will be excited by it, so OP will see even more of them.

RelevantAnywhere7002 · 2023-11-19T18:55:46+00:00

No one is really saying men ONLY want a LTR. You're confused because you've over simplified it.

You've conflated a few thing, so let me break this down. I can only speak for myself, so if other men are saying different things than me ... ok, I guess you'd have to ask them, I don't have anything to do with it.

So many men on here claim that average guys are innocent and just looking for a LTR and not interested in sleeping around

If they could wave a magic wand, most men would get an LTR. In the real world, it can take a long time to find someone you want for a LTRs, it's hard, and you might not ever ever find the right person. These men, understandably, can also enjoy casual sex, "sleeping around." Wanting an LTR and wanting casual sex are not mutually exclusive. Sleeping around isn't perfect, but it's better than nothing.

The amount of messages I get from men wanting to fuck that night

Most likely, they aren't all that serious. It never hurts to ask, right? The worst you could say is "no."

I don't message women like that, so I can't really say what's going on with them. You seem very judgmental, and negative about men. You're making assumptions about what they're thinking, and you might not be right.

and they just automatically assume I will fuck them just because they asked.

Do they tell you? How do you know what they assume? They asked, so they must have felt there was some possibility, so I'm not sure why you think them assuming you might want to hook up is a bad thing.

And when I tell them no, they bitch and complain afterwards. Like cmon.

Most likely, they messaged you while masturbating.

So stop acting like all guys are innocent and want a little virgin trad woman to marry and have kids.

Fine: they don't want a LTR to the exclusion of everything else, but an LTR is part of what they want, and they also want sex.

The same guys you’re defending are messaging women and giving no effort to get a quick fuck.

Ok, ... and? Sending a message is at least a little effort. Regardless, I don't see how that is a problem, other than, maybe for them, they might be more successful with a different strategy. It's their life, they can do it how the want to, so why should anyone care?

It’s pathetic.

You're entitled to your opinion.

I bet many guys in this group are some of those same guys that send NSFW messages to women like me….right? But I bet most of you wouldn’t admit it.

It sounds like you're angry. Who hurt you?

jesustan1989 · 2023-11-19T19:02:34+00:00

Most men are "innocent" because most of them can't get easy access to sex. Give them the resources and see how innocent they are. Them claiming innocence is just a coping machenism because they know that they couldn't get sex even if they tried. I know many men that bash women for sleeping around, but given the same opportunity, they would do tue same think.

EvilTribble · 2023-11-19T19:02:42+00:00

The subsection of men you're interacting with treat promiscuous women like disposable silverware. So yes your deviant sex kink reddit posts do indeed attract the worst possible kind of attention. Its silly to expect reddit neckbeard coomers to be indicative of what men look for. I can tell from your perspective that you're A. really young and B. A trusted male in your family/close circle hasn't told you anything about what men are like.

EdwardTheeMasterful · 2023-11-19T19:29:42+00:00

Eh this probably wouldn’t be brought up if all those fellows were your traditional army of Chads and Tyrones.

Ackee_an_Salfish · 2023-11-19T22:42:40+00:00

There are lots of men who want casual sex and also lots of men that want a LTR. The problems are both with say they want LTR and also the men that you’re chasing are either out of your league or they just don’t want to commit to YOU.

SlowEffective8146 · 2023-11-20T01:28:58+00:00

Lmao bruh so you posted on a NSFW subreddit and this is your sample that represents the entire planet's men? Holy shit.

babazuki · 2023-11-19T18:15:59+00:00

You're offended when guys say they want virgin trad woman to settle down with and have a family with. You would love to find a guy that actually did settle down with you.

You're pleased when other guys say they don't care about a woman's past, it's ok to be sexual. You hate it when those guys actually do act like sexuality should be free and casual.

They are 2 separate guys. You never go for the first because your emotions get in the way. The second guy lures you in by manipulating your emotions and you end up getting treated like a sex object.

thisreallyisnotok · 2023-11-19T18:11:30+00:00

This is the other side of the coin of women are wonderful syndrome.

Not every attractive woman is good for an LTR either due to incompatibility or objective flaws. And incompatibility for LTR doesn’t necessarily mean that FWB/casual wouldn’t work. But most women can’t cope with having sex with a man they can’t extract value from

Crimson-Pilled · 2023-11-19T18:28:06+00:00

Men want both: a stable monogamy with one woman and polygamy with many women of varying degrees of stability. Genghis Khan had it right.

Valuable-Marzipan761 · 2023-11-19T19:20:54+00:00

I have posted content (I do specify that I’m not looking for hookups) in some NSFW groups. The amount of messages I get from men wanting to fuck that night or become a fwb is astronomical.

An understanding of selection bias would solve so much confusion on here. We could do away with posts like this, or "married men don't have sex, just check out the dead bedroom sub".

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2_5yUm7rkh4&pp=ygUOc2VsZWN0aW9uIGJpYXM%3D

Frdxhds · 2023-11-19T21:12:55+00:00

I don't understand, because they want to fuck you it means they aren't interested in a LTR? How is that related? Wanting to fuck and wanting a LTR doesn't exclude each other at all?

HamzaAghaEfukt · 2023-11-20T00:16:17+00:00

Why don’t you go on a matrimonial website/app instead of whore-maker apps like Tinder and Bumble? Oh wait, because there aren’t enough male model you can match with on there

John_Oakman · 2023-11-19T18:26:40+00:00

The males who are respectful & looking for LTRs aren't the ones sending those messages, but then again, by being respectful they also had their man cards revoked so you are correct in the sense that all men are horndogs with no human decency. That is the case because modern masculinity has been redefined (whether accidently or otherwise) to be exclusively the worst traits of human behavior.

happy_discus · 2023-11-19T19:37:40+00:00

I don't. So your blanket statement is wrong.

Safinated · 2023-11-19T21:21:07+00:00

They aren’t. They’re looking for both, but are pickier for relationships.

Women don’t have to look for both, just relationships

Leobrandoxxx · 2023-11-20T00:45:05+00:00

So stop acting like all guys are innocent and want a little virgin trad woman to marry and have kids.

Stop internalizing redpill debates and pay more attention to the Real World.

there are TONS of men who are into casual sex and fwbs instead of the men you all think are out there who just want LTRs.

Sexuality is a spectrum. You're complaining about a fallacy by using another fallacy. It's a pointless cycle.

SteveSan82 · 2023-11-20T01:23:16+00:00

Less experienced guys are looking for LTR's. They still believe in that Disney fantasy nonsense. It is only after getting betrayed enough times that reality hits you about female nature and then you are just looking for casual sex.

But ultimately a man is never 100% sure about you until he sleeps with you, cums and still wants to stay

bikerider6969 · 2023-11-20T02:29:08+00:00

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HamzaAghaEfukt · 2023-11-20T02:56:41+00:00

Average looking men are willing to court and emotionally invest in women who aren’t whores. They will try to hookup first as they’ve learned from how women engage with hot men, but if they are convinced the woman is not a whore and only has sex in serious relationships, they will wait and invest emotionally.

That’s the difference between Chads and a average men. All men will take the path of least resistance to sex. Chad will either compel good non whore women to fuck or he will avoid them. Average men will stay and invest.

Obviously, you want Chads to stay, wait, and invest. Not average dudes.

ArcticAntelope · 2023-11-20T06:09:20+00:00

Are you stupid?

obviousredflag · 2023-11-20T07:53:53+00:00

I am just exposing that there are TONS of men who are into casual sex and fwbs instead of the men you all think are out there who just want LTRs.

So, how many percent of men are like this. Oh, you can't tell, because your stupid experiment didn't allow to measure how common this behavior is.

So many men on here claim that most average guys are innocent and just looking for a LTR and not interested in sleeping around unlike all women who “ride the cock carousel until they’re 30”.

So you can actually not say anything about if this is right or wrong, because you, frist, don't know i those guys are average guys and secondly, you don't know if more or less than 50% of average guys behave like you observed or is claimed.

And most of all, just like you post sex kink stuff on the side while being in a relationship, average guys can look for LTR and message women for casual sex. Funny, that you completely rule out the possibility that those guys that messaged you are in relationships and this behavior is part of it/their kink.

<- this is not an argument for or against men being super on the lookout for casual sex instead of relationships. It's an argument against your conclusion that simply cannot be drawn. Try again.

Meanwhile, look at preferred sex partner counts, actual sex partners and sociosexuality. Yes, men want about 3x as many sex partners as women, and women have an average ideal sex partner count of 1-2

<image>

And if most men fail to get to their preferred (low) number of sexual partners over a lifetime, you will have a lot of them constantly on the lookout for another sexual partner. Doesn't mean they actually do have casual sex. But overall, men and women both are not fucking around a lot. A tiny minority of men and women is having most of the sex and casual sex partners.

purplish_possum · 2023-11-20T13:17:53+00:00

OP doesn't understand how things usually play out.

Guys socialize and go on dates. Sometimes there's sex involved. Sometimes it's because the woman was horny and wanted a drive-by. Sometimes it's because they found each other attractive enough after six or seven drinks. Sometimes it's because they were bored and both participants basically figured why not I'm not doing anything else tonight. ...

Sometimes the participants had a good time. Repeat performances are scheduled. If the participants like having sex but are otherwise meh about each other a FWB situation develops. Both partners enjoy each other's company but are still on the prowl for better.

However, sometimes there's a real spark. When this happens the guy wants to spend every minute of every day with the woman. He falls stupid in love. When this happens guys commit almost instantly and stop looking for other women.

Guys want this stupid in love relationship. It's what they're looking for from the get go. Casual sex and FWB are just things they find along their way to their ultimate goal.

This isn't planned out. Indeed you can't plan it out. Life has to happen. Some guys fall for a woman who reciprocates very early in life. Some guys never get to experience love.

Just because something is all a guy finds doesn't mean it's all he's been looking for.

ComfortableJeans · 2023-11-19T18:05:34+00:00

It depends heavily on the groups you associate with. I don't want to fuck random strangers, that's gross. I only sleep with partners in relationships. I know a ton of boys who've openly said to me that sex without love and emotional attachment sucks and they'd rather not do it again.

I have posted content (I do specify that I’m not looking for hookups) in some NSFW groups. The amount of messages I get from men wanting to fuck that night or become a fwb is astronomical.

You post in porn subreddits? If that's the case, then, of course, it's going to be horny internet porn addicts firing off messages to very random with a vagina. What were you expecting?

There's tons of men who want a relationship out there, if you're taking the horny, desperate creeps on reddit as representative of the whole gender, then you're being silly.

Could it also be that the abarage men who want a relationship and not sex with randoms also would avoid a woman who is apparently frequently posting herself in NSFW groups?

If your goal was "exposing that there are TONS of men who are into casual sex." Then you may as well be exposing that water is wet and the wind blows.

More-Tax-62 · 2023-11-19T18:33:01+00:00

There is some truth to this. If guys could get laid as easily as women, you would see a lot less relationships.

This is why the phrase "why buy the cow if you can get the milk free" exists. Phrase that is usually applied to women's "contributions" to a relationship.

Lina-Inverse · 2023-11-20T14:44:34+00:00

So 1000 ppl dm'd the op who posted nudes online for a quick fuck and that means all men do this?

Are you stupid?

What about the other billions of men who didn't dm you? Do they not exist lol.

I wouldn't be caught dead DM'ing social media attention seekers for sex. What an absolute waste of time.

I am just exposing that there are TONS of men who are into casual sex and fwbs instead of the men you all think are out there who just want LTRs.

Wow! Men are into casual sex? You mean like women are too.

Truly groundbreaking research going on here.

Post more nudes and you'll win a nobel prize at this rate.

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wtffellification · 2023-11-19T18:54:16+00:00

Well, I'm not, so, not all men are

strokesfan1998 · 2023-11-19T19:16:26+00:00

People never cease to amaze me

Mexcol · 2023-11-19T19:22:53+00:00

Youre dangling a carrot in front if some thirsty dudes, what do you expect? They dont wanting to reach for it?

Should the messages have extra information like their card number to make you reconsider?

Flightlessbirbz · 2023-11-20T00:40:03+00:00

Are all men looking for casual hookups? No. Are there a lot more men than women looking for stuff like that or at least open to it? Absolutely. I feel like for the most part, most men and most women want a relationship. But the difference between the two is men are more likely to seek sex between relationships, while most women are content with their vibrator until they do find someone. Which is exactly why it’s so easy for women who do want casual sex to get it.

arhombus · 2023-11-20T00:43:37+00:00

Thot be gone. You’re perpetuating this BS. You’re not all women, you’re just another ho posting nudes online.

ArmariumEspada · 2023-11-19T18:52:46+00:00

I don’t think society promotes the idea that women are insatiable beasts who pursue sex and carnal pleasure, but that men are innocent and holy when it comes to sex. Society promotes the opposite, actually.

Your claim is disingenuous and unfair, especially when most men my age (I’m 23) are in deep pain because they can’t find meaningful relationships.

TigerRude4 · 2023-11-19T22:33:50+00:00

Average men take what they can get. Once they realise casual sex is not on the table, they go for relationships. That's just men who are primarily looking for hookups, but they can't. Then there is guys who primarily look for relationships. And then there's a small percentage of guys who primarily look for casual sex and can get it on a regular basis

moonsquid-25 · 2023-11-19T23:19:37+00:00

Men will sleep with slutty women, obviously. Men will have a relationship and marry those who aren't, as a general rule.

Willow-girl · 2023-11-19T23:56:17+00:00

Where were all of these guys when I was young and single? Maybe I wouldn't have racked up four divorces if they had only wanted one-night stands!

OKSector69 · 2023-11-20T00:36:56+00:00

Of course men want sex, but there are also different kinds of men looking for different things. If a man has never had a girlfriend and is really lonely and feels like he's missing out then those are the men who say "all I want is a girlfriend". Someone else who just got out of a bad relationship might just be looking to sleep around casually for a while. But in between that there are men who would like a relationship and are looking for one but it between finding it they take what they can get. If a man doesn't want a relationship with you after sleeping with you then he's really not that into you.

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Tuatara77 · 2023-11-20T06:13:10+00:00

There's a difference in if a man can or cannot ride the carousel as well, if you're unable to participate in sex because firstly many individual reasons, and one other reason that being a man in general is harder to simply sleep around than women, then yes I think alot of men would like to sleep around and if they could they wouldn't be as hesitant to look for a partner who did the same, this is not the world we live in though, and so some want someone with the same experience.

Alot of men are being realistic and would instead prefer LTR, but you won't find them in the places you searched to begin with.

garacus · 2023-11-20T09:41:48+00:00

Yeah, I agree here. Whilst I agree there's probably a fair few, who are also unlikely to message random women, so are hidden, there's no way men at least in their 20s who want a LTR are a silent majority.

SnooMarzipans6929 · 2023-11-21T01:54:59+00:00

Lmao people are morons. I get what you're saying. You're right. Had to weed through a lot of garbage men before I found my current love.

BlackFurosuto · 2023-11-21T06:21:35+00:00

I will say, I do agree that women sleeping around indiscriminately is reflective of a human thing, your comparing men's goals to a NSFW subreddit is not great. You skewed your sample to guys who would only want to hookup just from where you were looking. Dating apps would be better.

BandemicBuffering · 2023-11-21T11:39:42+00:00

Sex precedes LTRs in the 21st century 95% of the time...

HotStuff_ · 2023-11-21T14:58:03+00:00

I’m a virgin and do not want casual sex

MagicPigeonToes · 2023-11-25T01:50:46+00:00

Don’t go on nsfw expecting to not get that kind of attention lol. But I do agree, there’s definitely average guys who just want hookup and nothing else. I once told a dude I was asexual, and he still asked me when I was coming over. Super dense.

Title	Men are looking for casual sex and fwbs whether you want to hear it or not.
Author	Cat_Lover259
Upvotes	59
Comments	321
Date	November 19, 2023 5:53 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/17z2odo/men_are_looking_for_casual_sex_and_fwbs_whether/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/men-are-looking-for-casual-sex-and-fwbs-whether.1238851 https://theredarchive.com/post/1238851

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