Some women get so desperate for the ring they end up accepting any situation just for the sake of being married. Better be single than with scrotes like this...

Jandi18 · 2021-08-27T05:43:24+00:00

It’s not really 50/50 though! Does he also carry the pregnancy 50 percent of the time? What about giving birth? No? Yes 50/50 doesn’t work!

TERFSareawesome · 2021-08-27T08:25:37+00:00

This is EXACTLY how LVM operate. It doesnt surprise me that she's posting at age 27. In her early 20s she was willing to overlook this stuff because *being in a relationship!* *engagement!* *planning wedding!* Now she's in her late 20s and starting to get wiser, and realizing that this is going to be her life forever. this sums up so well the hell of being with LVM- they are disconnected, so selfish, so greedy, so only concerned about what benefits them. Living with them is DANGEROUS because of the stress it puts on your body, mind, and emotions. It's horrific for your well being. The sooner she cuts her losses and divorces this loser the better off she'll be- he will NEVER change and there's no point in trying to get him to. Why would he? He's a selfish loser doing what's easy for him, and this relationship fits perfectly. What a POS.

CroneRaisedMaiden · 2021-08-27T07:41:40+00:00

Ya you can change him….into an ex husband bye 🙋🏻‍♀️

Jandi18 · 2021-08-27T05:42:30+00:00

He wants 50/50 until you divorce and marriage property comes into play! Then he will cry and say women get everything!!

sozwrongrobi · 2021-08-27T06:57:12+00:00

Ladies, I just saw this post, checked the poster’s history and she was trying to post this in FDS too. There’s hope!!!

PollyannaPenny · 2021-08-27T07:15:38+00:00

And I'll bet the scrote makes more money than her and still expects all expenses to be split 50/50 right down to the penny.

The fact that he can keep meticulous tabs on this crap proves that he does no child care. Nobody caring for a baby while also working has the energy to do accounting for every purchase

Phoenix__Rising2018 · 2021-08-27T05:45:26+00:00

70/30 relationship at best but keeps calling it 50/50 🤔

Imagine some scrote not even letting you rest while you are pregnant.

Meanwhile I have a male family member right now who's doing everything for his pregnant wife so she can just rest and not worry.

I know which type of guy I would rather choose.

TERFSareawesome · 2021-08-27T08:28:10+00:00

Also, any man who is nickel and diming a woman to this extent HATES her. Probably hates women in general, and gets a sick thrill out of forcing a pregnant woman to get up and grab her wallet so she can buy him ice cream. He's a misogynist who dislikes women in general and this is a form of sadism- physically running her into the ground, using her up and getting a good laugh out of him gaslighting her and not having to give anything back. Absolutely sick. Probably kids arent safe around him either cause the dude has serious issues in general

Pornruinedsociety · 2021-08-27T06:22:22+00:00

This would have been me, if I hadn't refused to have kids with and divorced, my last moocher husband. I'm so thankful I got away.

AyemHerself · 2021-08-27T08:52:48+00:00

Why isn't he carrying 50/50 of the pregnancies?

Some dude will want to chime in with "but he can't!" No shit. That's the point. Why won't he do something to compensate for this inability? He's obviously living this marriage on easy mode. 50/50 my ass.

AnniaT · 2021-08-27T06:03:38+00:00

The only way is divorcing this scrote. He won't change and he doesn't love and respect her.

Flufferly · 2021-08-27T05:51:37+00:00

Can this entire thread just go in the handbook? Like, permalinked so I can send people this whenever the 50/50 argument comes up?

vaguelinen · 2021-08-27T05:32:51+00:00

I doubt it’s 50/50 for oral sex though.

ChocoBananza · 2021-08-27T05:38:07+00:00

‘…It’s not 50/50 when I end up paying more.’

I got flashbacks. This could be me, but luckily, I escaped in time. I can’t express how much I want to slap some sense into this woman.

For anyone curious, it’s a no, you can’t change a 50/50 man. I tried with everything I had back in the day.

Painfulmenstruation · 2021-08-27T05:44:58+00:00

She’d be happier divorced.

aenema46n2 · 2021-08-27T05:53:18+00:00

My head is spinning just from reading this. She sounds miserable. WHY STAY? WHY?! He sounds like literal trash. Throw that trash OUT honey🤦‍♀️

FodderFigureIllushun · 2021-08-27T10:01:18+00:00

The majority of reddit bashes on women who don't go 50/50 on dates but relationships like this lady's are the reason I will never accept a 50/50 man.

If he treats you mediocre in the beginning, it'll only get worse after you're married.

daisy_0720 · 2021-08-27T07:22:04+00:00

And Scrotes and Pickmes screech that we're crazy for refusing to date men who insist on 50-50.

No. We're not. Because this is the end result, right here. This is the 'relationship' you're signing up for. A man who will never surprise you with flowers. A man who will never take you out to dinner as a treat. A man who will never buy you a lovely gift 'just because'. A man who will never book a vacation for the two of you. She's learnt the hard way. 50-50 kills romance. This isn't a romantic relationship. She's basically a roommate that he fucks.

Equal-Ear2312 · 2021-08-27T06:14:44+00:00

Whoa! He wants them to take turns? Why not change the diapers when he comes home, all of them until morning, since she's wfh and with the baby?

This one keeps a tab ffs! 🤡

We need to unlock what "equality" means for this scrote! My ex was the same. He used the term "equality" to shame me or something, even though it was clear I contributed more financially and emotionally to the relationshit.

There's one book and movie called joy luck club. One of the women there is in a 50 - 50 relationship and by the end of the film/book she leaves her stingy scrote of s husband and she's way happier.

glowmilk · 2021-08-27T10:18:17+00:00

This is so childish and impractical…too many women accept this 50/50 shit when dating and don’t realise how much they’ll end up suffering because of it. I really hate how men have hijacked what we think of as “equality”. It is not fair or just to have partners taking things in turns like the relationship is some sort of game. It’s completely unrealistic. Women and men are not the same and splitting everything down the middle will not make it so.

Not everything that’s fair will be necessarily be equal, and that’s okay. Letting your pregnant wife rest while you take care of everything in the house may not be “equal” but it is fair and just. Considering that she is carrying your child and experiencing all sorts of new body changes and discomfort, it is only fair that you ensure she is taken care of and is not being made to over-exert herself. A relationship can NEVER be 100% equal due to biological and social differences. Attempting to make it so just ends up harming the woman.

A man must really be devoid of empathy and even logic to put “50/50” above the comfort of his partner and the efficiency of the household. How foolish is it to not even change your child’s diaper because you did it last time and now it’s your wife’s turn lol? How efficient is that…and so selfish considering that she needs to rest. The man’s gotta go. I really hope she divorces his ass.

NowTruly · 2021-08-27T07:28:52+00:00

Damn. This was literally one of the daughter’s stories in “The Joy Luck Club”.

** Husband had lobster at the restaurant. She had a salad. 50/50 split.

** Husband would go down the grocery list and itemize the whole thing for a “fair split”. (I think he even refused to cover her tampons?)

** And I think he was a lawyer and she was a paralegal, if I remember correctly. Still 50/50.

The mom had to share her story of woe, but the daughter woke up and kicked that POS to the curb. After she saw her own worth, she found a hottie who cherished her.

I hope this sister wakes up soon.

firenest · 2021-08-27T07:08:18+00:00

This is the quintessential "50/50" relationship.

LadieLemon · 2021-08-27T10:00:06+00:00

That's a lot of words to say "he hates me". He can't be changed, but a divorce would change her life for the better.

aquietsword · 2021-08-27T05:57:40+00:00

I can't stress enough how easy it is to replace a scrote with a vibrator. Like, why deal with someone like this??? Has he EVER even actually turned you on? Made you feel like you had an actual PARTNER? He contributes 30% max and claims 50% like your typical scrote. We all know men project onto women, every bullshit quality they have they try and twist around and make it seem like women are that way. But an EQUALLY infuriating thing is women projecting onto men. Projecting our love and care and humanity. Men like this are fucking devoid of anything good and completely broken, don't project your goodness onto them and get yourself into shit like this.

Hippofuzz · 2021-08-27T06:26:21+00:00

Wtf????? They are so talented in finding excuses/ways to be bad partners

YesPleaseMadam · 2021-08-27T07:04:06+00:00

the tip is dump him sister

honeybadgerattitude · 2021-08-27T11:40:39+00:00

It’s actually quite easy to change a 50/50 husband. You just divorce him and get a better one that actually loves you.

starpuppery · 2021-08-27T05:59:09+00:00

one word, EW!

BlueSkiesOverLondon · 2021-08-27T12:49:39+00:00

This woman is asking the wrong question, because this guy isn’t a “50/50 man.” He’s a man who will do anything to avoid doing work, and doesn’t care about the burden he’s imposing on her. As a result, as she admits, this relationship isn’t 50/50, or even close to it. He’s just stingy and selfish, that’s all. That’s how almost all “50/50 men” actually are, when you tally up the work and money they and their partners each contribute.

(Even if a real “50/50 man” existed, though, the answer is still no. Stop trying to change men.)

CrazyPaine · 2021-08-27T09:27:13+00:00

She's gonna burn herself out trying to keep up with this 50/50 man. I feel sorry for her. I hope she is able to get out sooner than later because there is a lot of ✨resentment✨ coming soon. Besides she can't change a man that doesn't want to change at all.

Sea_Soil · 2021-08-27T11:04:39+00:00

This man doesn't love you.

lilac-hiraeth · 2021-08-27T12:55:41+00:00

I feel for her. She needs to leave him immediately. She will lose nothing but a headache and open herself up to being happy. My ex husband worked as little as possible and covered 1.5 of our bills (one being an expense he pushed for). If he got me a gift it was still with my money. Any kind of date, my money. He blew my money on video games because it was “a shared pot” of finances (never again).

Men who are not generous, men who do not work full time, men who don’t understand saving money are men who will ruin you. Do not give greedy, broke, penny pinching men the time of day! And a 50/50 man outside of finances is the most painted clown there can be. There is no such thing as 50/50 for women if her partner is a man.

Zurflu · 2021-08-27T13:36:58+00:00

I think guys wanting to go "50/50" is a dead giveaway that he doesn't imagine himself being with you forever. He's saving money for a potential new life. What other reason is there to act like this? Money spent on his family isn't money lost unless he has another plan for the money.

LucyStar3 · 2021-08-27T14:02:04+00:00

When a guy says 50-50, he's viewing the marriage as a BUSINESS transaction. And he'll definitely try to gain the profit, that's what business is about. You want to marry for business? Do it by all means but then be ready to play hard for your profit. If you view this marriage as life long partner journey (which is what real marriage should be), then you're in for a rude awakening.

Why not stay single till you find a LIFE partner and a relationship based on love, instead of settling for a business relationship (of which you already have one if you work)?

pinksamosa · 2021-08-27T09:49:34+00:00

I would ask her to change her husband.

zombiessalad · 2021-08-27T11:04:09+00:00

I never even realized that my father will always take the bill whenever hes out with my mom, even though now they share everything he still does it. The fact that these men cant even do the bare minimum will never not be mind boggling to me…

effypom · 2021-08-27T12:32:24+00:00

Oh my, any man she dates after him is going to seem like a dream for her.

AntiqueGhost13 · 2021-08-27T13:02:15+00:00

A part of me has to believe this isn't real. One of the comments says he didn't do his laundry for 6 weeks and drinks directly out of milk cartons? And she still had two kids with him at such a young age?? I just can't even fathom that.

Austenma · 2021-08-27T13:24:48+00:00

Ah, the typical 99/1 relationship. No thank you. I hope this woman leaves him soon. Being a single mother sounds much more appealing. Babysitters she can hire will do so much more LVM

NotYourCirce · 2021-08-27T13:49:51+00:00

Why does she still love him after this though? He makes her life miserable. After FDS, I can’t understand it

excusemeILY · 2021-08-27T08:50:05+00:00

This type of man doesn’t deserve a wife or to have a family.

I hope this woman frees herself from the dead weight and raises her kids away from that horrible person

3orangelove · 2021-08-27T12:33:38+00:00

What tips do you have to change this?

Ex-change this, sis! 🙅🏼‍♀️

Waste-Win · 2021-08-27T13:23:19+00:00

Well you can't change a 50/50 man but you can 100% replace the man, which I HIGHLY suggest.

I don't really mean to shame her because I understand how she felt for that 50/50 crap, but girl hwy on earth would you give him a second baby??

karabnp · 2021-08-27T13:47:23+00:00

I read this one last night...😒 SO vile. I always say/remind others when this comes up: “It’s NEVER 50/50. It NEVER has been!! Here’s why...”

FlockAroundtheClock · 2021-08-27T07:58:02+00:00

The "tip for changing this" is not marrying or procreating with men like this in the first place. FFS this behavior didn't magically happen over night.

basicbagels · 2021-08-27T15:53:46+00:00

If I read that right, she’s pregnant by him again? She is delusional.

modernmedusaa · 2021-08-27T09:08:38+00:00

This is your future with a tit for tat 50/50 guy

You’ll do 80 whilst he does 20 and thinks it’s fair

No thanks !

Vivierex · 2021-08-27T15:02:42+00:00

How do people notice how shit their partner is after being married and having kids with them ? I know a lot of people lie and pretend but this kind of behaviour doesn't happen in one day.

Hampered-Siren · 2021-08-27T20:35:19+00:00

He has literally no reason to change. Every thing is working out just FINE for him. Never mind she is in torment every day trying to handle everything and "pay her share".

Sweetie, your husband is a selfish, self-centered, shallow, self-serving, heartless, worthless piece of crap. No man ever, would be better than continuing this farce of a marriage.

Muffcakelord · 2021-08-27T09:22:20+00:00

Purely trying to see through a man's eyes, i guess if a woman had her tubes tied (and he paid for half of the procedure), and she's obviously not about to have children with him etc, then 50/50 could maybe make sense (to him).

But these men are looking at the person who carried and birthed their child and thinking 50/50 means 50/50 so long as the resources are distributed evenly. Even if the man is mentally retarded and/or has never in his life read about female anatomy, simply carrying some kilos extra on your stomach seems like a hell of a job in itself, and i refuse to believe that men can believe birth to be pleasurable. The math does simply not add up.

Noone can convince me that this kind of mindset is not abusive. I know about the boiling frog analogy but people need to call men out on this for being ABUSIVE and nothing else whenever it happens. It's not ignorance, it's not laziness, it's classic abuse.

MACMUA · 2021-08-27T22:24:26+00:00

I can’t imagine being pregnant and having to deal with this

cynthiaat92 · 2021-08-28T01:46:01+00:00

Fuck this lazy man

Anyanka-goes-rawr · 2021-08-27T14:09:42+00:00

What sub is this in because I need to read the comments lol

beautyinthesky · 2021-08-28T03:49:05+00:00

A relationship is not 50/50. It’s 100/100.

frustratedmarxistfem · 2021-08-28T06:35:53+00:00

Red flag. Men obsessed with "equality" do it to spite modern women. "Oh you want equality, I'll show you equality"

2021-08-28T10:02:06+00:00

Throw out the husband

girl_in_red_costume · 2021-08-27T16:41:45+00:00

Why do women procreate with men like this?

glossiglam · 2021-08-27T14:12:40+00:00

Wow this is embarrassing. I’m so happy to not be her

seraphinelysion · 2021-08-27T16:44:16+00:00

Abort the baby. Abort the man.

xfelugirlx · 2021-09-22T20:14:11+00:00

He won’t change, been there. Men like that never change, move on sis

2021-08-27T11:22:08+00:00

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2021-08-27T13:08:50+00:00

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kitnb · 2021-08-28T20:02:02+00:00

Throw the whole damn man out, sis! 🗑 🤡

Never. Ever. Accept 50/50! I mean EVER! Because it’s NEVER 50/50! Women carry almost all the mental load. Women do almost all of the domestic work. Women do almost all, if not all, all of the childcaring! Women don’t make as much as men, in general. Women aren’t treated equally in this toxic patriarchal society. Women are biologically saddled with pregnancy and child birth. Men are not even doing 50% of raising their own damn kids so why are men demanding you pay 50% of everything?!? Oh, that’s right! Because IT BENEFITS THEM AND ONLY THEM.

You’re not on sale, sis. Youre not 50% off + free labor, a free in-house chef, free dry cleaning, a free bangmaid, a free therapist, etc etc.

VALUE YOURSELF! THEN ADD TAX!

Let me repeat:

VALUE YOURSELF! THEN ADD TAX!

Any man trying to con you into 50/50 will never do 50% of shit! He’s using that libfem lingo aka “relationship equality” aka 50/50 to force you into doing 100% of the care and feeding of a relationship while making you pay for half of the bills. This is not a fair or equitable situation. It’s predatory. Recognize the game, ladies. And don’t fall for it.

Vet a man! Then keep vetting him!!

Any man wanting to go Dutch is a user/abuser. GET RID OF HIM IMMEDIATELY. Don’t make excuses for him like “he’s a broke college student”, “he’s saving for a house”, “he just started a new job”— sis, he can plan a free or inexpensive THOUGHTFUL date! No excuse!

No one wants to date an asshole small dick loser who breaks out an Excel spreadsheet every time you see each other. GTFOH! No one wants to date (or god forbid marry!!!) a petty ass scrote that’s “keeping score” and has a tally of “how much you owe him” always running in his head (hint: you don’t owe him shit!!).

Date a generous man! Date a thoughtful man! And, no, he doesn’t have to be rich to be generous. Let me give you a personal experience from yesterday of a genuinely generous man:

I’m a home owner in NYC. I live alone in my 2900 sq foot building. I have to do everything including maintenance (or hire someone to do it). And in this huge old house there’s TONS to do! I work all day so often the only time I get to do stuff is late at night or stolen afternoons on the weekends. The city of NY has a tree outside my house with a little fence that they don’t care for that’s overgrown with weeds and has made for the perfect den for NYC rats! I’ve seen the rats living in there and don’t want them on my property and/or trying get into my property. So in nasty, humid, heat advisory weather at like 12:30 at night(!!) I had had enough of watching rats frolic in the weeds, grabbed my long pruning shears and went to town on the weeds.

Exhausted, drenched in sweat, in an expensive sundress, my back on fire, a guy parks his car in front of my house, sees me then immediately offers me a bottle of cold water. I say “no but thank you” and go back to struggling with the weeds. He locks up his car but then turns back and says “miss, I see you working so hard and it’s really humid and hot out here, please take this cold bottle of water? It’s completely sealed and ice cold” as he’s extending it out to me with this gentle, pained look on his face. I could see the frost on the bottle. I could see the plastic seal attached to the cap still intact. I wanted a cold drink so badly. I said “thank you so much” and reached out and took it. I looked over the bottle real quick and confirmed that the bottle was completely sealed and not tampered with then cracked it open and gulped down half the bottle right on the spot.

He was turning to leave when I just started talking to him about weeds and rats, he turned back and listened and chimed in. We had a great convo about NYC, life and everything in between. He’s a dispatcher and works the late shift, he had just gotten off work. He lives 6 blocks away but could only find a park in front of my house— trust me, NYC parking is that bad! That was his only bottle of water. I didn’t have anything cold in the refrigerator. I could only offer him tap water so I offered to go to the 24 hour corner deli and get us both a cold drink. He refused. I insisted because I had destroyed his cold water and wanted another one, LOL!

We walked the couple dozen feet to the store. I grabbed bottles of cold water and a Diet Coke, asked him to pick out what he wanted, he got a small bottle of water then put his hand out to take all the bottles I was about to carry to the counter. Then he put it on the counter and refused to let me pay. I had my Apple Watch with Apple Pay ready to go and he refused to move and pulled out his cash. He did it in a super cute and chivalrous way that actually made me laugh. I didn’t get a hint of misogyny or toxic masculinity. He just seemed genuinely generous!!

P.S. Bottles of water/Diet Coke notwithstanding, thougfulness and kindness doesn’t cost a damn thing! Being a good human and a gentleman is FREE! Opening a door is FREE! Holding out a chair is FREE! Helping a woman with bags is FREE! Helping a woman put on her coat is FREE! Opening a jam jar is FREE! Changing a tire is FREE! Moving a heavy piece of furniture is FREE! Killing a spider is FREE! Etc, etc! Yet so many men refuse to treat us kindly and considerately! Find a man who’s generous with everything— including his time and affection! Want better for yourself, sisters! It costs them little to nothing to treat you well!! Don’t let them lie to you and try to convince you otherwise!

We wind up drinking bottles of water on my front steps then talking and laughing and having a great time for 5 hours straight!! The ease of conversation was shocking yet refreshing. I wanted to walk— I like walking, riding bikes etc.— so I offered to walk him in the direction of his home. He didn’t want to but I insisted. He wound up walking me back home (😂😂) because he didn’t want me walking home alone at 6 am— there was a strange guy checking us out that made me feel a little unsettled. He saw this and didn’t want that guy messing with me while I walked back home alone. (He showed situational awareness, empathy, chivalry and that protecting me/my safety is more important than his own comfort and wanting to go home, shower and sleep.)

We have a date set up for tomorrow, ladies! (Yay!) And I can guarantee you he won’t ask to go Dutch or have me paying for anything— not because he’s rich (I make more money than him). Not because I ask him to take care of any bill but because he was brought up by a mother that taught him to be a good human, to treat women with respect or she’d beat his ass on the spot (and has when he was a kid/teenager). If he were to disprespect a woman, he considers that he ultimate disrespect towards his mother and all she worked so hard to do.

Anyway…

Men aren’t stupid. Men know exactly what they are doing. When they offer 50/50 or don’t pay the whole bill on dates, they are grooming you and priming you for further use and abuse.

Pass, sis. 🤡

Good men still exist. They’re just harder to find… But some are still out there. Keep searching and never stop vetting.

Japanese-Spaghetti · 2021-10-06T14:37:56+00:00

A leopard never changes its spots. It’s unlikely that she’ll be able to change this man unless they both agree to go to couple’s counselling, but even then it’s no guarantee. 50/50 just simply doesn’t work and ALWAYS is in the man’s best interest and the woman’s worst nightmare.

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