Daily Community Chat Megathread

AutoModerator · 2021-12-01T05:00:13+00:00

This daily thread is designed to be a place for all the funny discussions on PPD. Feel free to post off-topic questions, information, points-of-view, etc... in...

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Even taking tiktok/social media into account, I feel like I live in a completely different bubble from most of the people here.

I never see thirst traps on tiktok, I’m sure due to whatever the algorithm does. All the girls I see on there are lesbians, or they’re talking about autism, or showing off their weird collections or their Etsy shop. Right now it’s really into showing me women who live off-grid in Alaska for some reason. And it’s sort of the same with Instagram - everyone I follow on there is a hobbyist of some sort. Cake decorating, bullet journaling, pottery, whatever. I barely even see anyone’s face on my feed.

So don’t get me wrong, I do believe that thirst traps, etc. exist on social media. I’m sure influencers post insane shit. It’s just fascinating that two social media experiences can look so different from one another, and that social media can become representative of the world if you aren’t careful.

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I’ve never seen a person who has his life together, their head screwed on, and also does drugs at the same ti

You don't get out much then. My friend group includes:

A product manager at a fortune 100 company

An MBA classmate from Republic of Korea who joined the US Army to become an American citizen and worked in supply chain for a fortune 100 as well

A small biotech startup CEO

An MBA classmate and commodities day trader who's net worth is in the mid eight digits at 28 years old (yes I'm jelly)

Another MBA classmate from Korea who works for one of the top 5 biggest dragon multinationals

Another MBA classmate who works at an auto startup and is an O-6 in the Navy

And my childhood best friend who works at JP Morgan Chase.

Of these people only the navy officer and the 2nd Korean guy DON'T consume drugs and alcohol at least on occasion. The navy guy because he's mormon and the Korean due to a repressed cultural upbringing.

P.s. alcohol is far far more damaging and psychoactive than most drugs, save for the really crazy hard drugs.

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I remember when the incel subreddit was around. It was literally just people commiserating about no gf, and posting memes about Elliot roger and that guy with the call of duty black ops t shirt. In terrible taste, yeah, but you portraying them as wanting to rape and murder people is the worst example of dishonesty and disingenuousness I can think of.

You’re not gonna like this, but I have nothing but the utmost sympathy, compassion, and concern towards incels. I know exactly how they feel. I have been there. I know what it’s like to be a male virgin at 23 in a society that actively debases and degrades male virginity, that shoves sex in your face 24/7 and makes you think it’s the utmost goal of the human experience and if you haven’t achieved it by some arbitrary age you are a worthless failure and an outcast. I know what it’s like to read comments by women saying they’d never date a virgin, to see two other people in an argument and one brings up virgin as an insult to silence the other. It makes you feel worthless. I have been there at it led me down a path towards many regretful decisions but I never once harboured violent thoughts towards anyone.

You acting like incels are some terrorist threat is just sad and pathetic when there are far bigger problems in society. People who abuse their girlfriends aren’t incels. People who rape women aren’t incels. Most incels never leave their parents house except for work. It’s so weird and pathetic the obsessive hate that some have for people who are basically already at the bottom and as low as they can be.

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Simple answer - artistic expression. Not that I don't think hip-hop should be immune from criticism and we should have discussion's about it's use of violent rhetoric and misogyny, however at the end of the day it is an art form where you can separate the art from the artist, or understand that representing something in art is not inherently a statement of intent (e.g. I don't believe that horror film directors, or fans of horror, want to inflict violence upon others). Hip-Hop has come a long way as well, there's no way that Eminem would get away with bars about rape nowadays. Hell, since it's inception gangster rap has been incredibly controversial and has been subject to many boycotts and huge levels of discourse, so it's not like everyone thinks it's hunky dory.

I don't know about you, but I don't think that talking about much you hate women and want to rape them on an Incel forum is artistic expression in any shape or form. They are discussing their own views of reality.

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[–]Notanothrshitthrow1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Hell if Incels wanna start rapping I'd love to see it, the cringe would be delightful.

The difference would be the separation of art from the artist. If I know that an artist is an Incel (one of the more hateful ones at that), and makes art that glorifies Incel philosophies and encourages fellow Incels to commit violence, then to me it would be more akin to propaganda (such as the white supremacist punk bands). They're free to make their art, but doesn't mean that it should be respected or promoted, not all art is should be respected. Art is not free from criticism in any way either, so it's not like if an Incel put their bullshit into song form it would become immune from criticism. Again, Hip-Hop has had a lot of criticism throughout the years (some justified, some not).

Drill music in the UK for example often discusses gang rivalries and threats of violence, as such it has been subject to a lot of criticism and even arrests.

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[–]Notanothrshitthrow1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Propaganda for what cause though? There needs to be an explicit agenda behind it, such as a call for violence in the name of a certain belief. Rapping about bitches and guns isn't a call to action in of itself.

I suspect as well that you haven't listened to all that much Hip-Hop, because there is far more to it than just bitches and guns. Yes, there is a problem with Misogynist lyrics, however I (and I suspect most people) can see the difference between talking about objectifying women and calling for them to be raped, subjugated, extreme hatred of them etc.

hip hop artists are more violent than incels through and through but you give them a pass

I don't give hip-hop artists who call for violence a free pass, and I don't respect artists who overly rely on misogynistic or violent lyrics, many other Hip-Hop fans feel the same way.

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I agree with you dude. Looks is the foundation of all relationships. Without it you can’t even build the relationship.

The Blackpill isn’t just saying looks matter. It’s saying it’s the most important part of any type of sexual relationship by a long shot. You cannot have a sexual relationship with that includes lust without the people in the relationship being physically sexually attracted to each other.

Women do not care if you’re a nice person with funny jokes if you’re not physically attractive. No amount of present and appealing personality is going to change that basic fact.

Only after you’ve become attractive is when you will start noticing that women are suddenly being interested in you.

There’s a reason it’s called love at first sight, not love at first conversation.

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Lol maybe… I think there is some sense in it as William explained. I don’t think I’m that normal since I spend time on ppd 😂

I am scared of marrying someone who loses their desire towards me, but even women struggle with that fear. They grow old, fat and it makes sense how they are afraid the guy will stop wanting them as much.

So I think the guys who are talking about “avoid beta bux” are afraid the main reason women agrees to date or marry them is the commitment and money they provide. So she treats sex as a chore. She loses desire for him once the commitment is secure and kids are there to focus on.

My point is that the money part isn’t a problem, it’s the lack of desire that is the problem. So yeah it’s sad how men who read trp decide to go for alpha and give up beta when they should aim for the right mix… it seems obvious to me. If you love her wouldn’t you want to give her your best?

I don’t know… its sad.

[–]Slipthepill right in 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]WilliamWyattD 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

You need a simplified tag line to be memorable. But yeah, the reality is nuanced.

Still, the point is that modern culture amplifies everyone prioritization of sex and thus physical attraction. And this trend is accelerating. So BB is basically using 3P elements (Provision, Protection, and Parental Investment) to try to compensate for not meeting a woman's Good Genes (physical attractiveness, real competence, game) requirements.

If you meet her GG requirements, and are using 3P elements to supplement your offer, you are Alpha Buxxing, which is the best of all worlds for a woman. No real issues there so long as your GG offer continues to meet her GG requirements in a world where women's GG requirements, and especially the physical attractiveness aspect of them, keep increasing.

But if your GG offer doesn't meet her ask, then TRP suggests that this will cause issues even if your 3P advantages attract her overall. Sex will be less enthusiastic, and once kids get older and she has assured herself of access to your 3P elements, her weighting of GG vs. 3P will slide dramatically towards GG. Your overall offer will no longer meet her overall ask. She will divorce you in her 40s.

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[–]dbz195 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

TRP hits the nail on the head https://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/r1j140/the_number_1_mistake_that_majority_of_men_make/

I don't agree with a lot of what they say or their "ideology" or world view in general, but sometimes gold comes out of there.

This post is gold. If I was a simp for fake reddit points, I'd probably gift it something.

The fact of life is that the kind of person others try to mould you into is not the best person you can be. The kind of person your parents try to mould you into is not the best person you can be. Nobody has your best interests at heart except you. Your parents will make a 1,000 mistakes in raising you, even if they ultimately love you, they will make so many fuck ups and you shouldn't take for granted that everything they try to instil into you is correct.

Society and other people do not have your best interests at heart. The person they try to mould you into is someone who they can take advantage of, not someone who stands up for his and takes what he wants. The type of man that feminists try to mould you into is not the type of man who is successful and happy, he is not even remotely the type of man any of them would go for, not by a long shot.

Do not go for what other people tell you to be, trust your gut instinct, trust what you feel is right, what you want from life, and be the kind of man you want to be. Do not sacrifice your goals and aspirations in trying vainly to become the type of man others want you to be. Do not try to become the type of man your father or mother wants you to be, even though they love you, this is not the type of man who is happy with his life and who achieves what he wants.

Make sure you know YOUR goals and aspirations, not the goals and aspirations others want you to have. Forge your own path in life with a clear goal that YOU want. Don't listen to anyone trying to gaslight you, shame you, or make you diverge from your path that you have set out for your life. They do not want you to to reach your goal, they want you to be a stepping stone in them reaching their goal.

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I think one of the reasons that takimg the lead is a quality is so well taught by TRP is because it's a reframing of the emotional labor that women want put into a relationship. I've noticed that male bonding often happens in a way that is very different from the way that female bonding happens at least in female partnerships or friendships.

It seems like for men just being near their romantic partner is fulfilling for them. it doesn't really need to be deep conversation or the solfocus of the activity. for instance men can play video games together speaking very little to each other maybe only making eye contact for a couple seconds during a lobby before a new game starts. And male bonding works that way, they can feel like they had a very productive time hanging out.

However with women, often when they spend time together conversation tends to be the primary focus. Women will choose things like going out to lunch together together or arts and crafts that let them have long serious conversations and frequently make eye contact because they crave that deeper level of connection during their time together. So when men try to bond with women in the way the male and male bonding happens women tend to find that very unsatisfying or surface level.

By telling men to perform more of the leadership role they help men by by letting these men sort of step into the minds of these women and plan things that are more fulfilling for them such as dates where the sole purpose is to spend time together in a more intimate fashion. Its about understanding what women crave in a way that is more palatable to men this helps bridge that sort of disconnect.

I don't think women want to be lead all the time, nearly as much as they just want the men that want to be intimate with respond in a way that translates to them. They want that same level of emotional labor, but displayed in a more masculine way.

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These tweets were made years apart, it's probably not even the same person who wrote both. And it's also Twitter, where organizations and celebrities struggle to be clear and accurate while also being concise.

I don't care if the tweets were made years apart, and I don't care if they written by the same person or not. Every journalist, big or small, has a responsibility to be fair, consistent, and accurate in their reporting. But today's lying, corrupt mainstream media wouldn't know the words "responsibIlity, fairness, consistency, and accuracy" if those words punched them in their lying, corrupt faces. And they've been operating that way for at least five years, probably longer.

Should they have used the word "driver" for both? Maybe. But anyone with any passing knowledge of the Waukesha incident knows the car wasn't driving itself.

Sure. That doesn't change the fact that the lying, corrupt mainstream media are trying to bury the story.

A more salient criticism would probably be found in their full-length articles covering these stories and not two out-of-context tweeks right next to each other.

That's a fair point. I distinctly recall the hysterical, breathless, wall-to-wall coverage that the LCMSM lavished on the Charlottesville killer for weeks. But not even 2 weeks after the Waukesha incident, the LCMSM are doing their level best to bury the story. Nothing to see here, move along. Why might that be the case, pray tell?

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I'll repost it as I've posted it right before the changing of megathread.

A woman from Russia lives in and writes about Costa-Rica:

Women (in Costa-Rica) always stay with children. For fathers it is infinitely easier.

It seems to me that in poor families (especially among the Nicaraguans) this is the usual pattern that they follow. If your mother raised you alone, or your grandmother raised you alone, while your mother went to work in a neighboring country, then when you grow up, you will not begin to feel sorry for your woman at all, but you will shrug your shoulders: your mother was able to, everyone is doing well, what's a big deal? And get out.

Moreover, the ban on abortion. Women from poor families are not very experienced in all of this, contraceptives are expensive. And then the child is not the decision of the couple, but just - well, the child.

This is all very sad.

She owns a hotel and one of her cleaners are young women, a lot of them are single mothers. She pays for education of one of them and helps with some payments another who has two kids and no help from anyone else. Woman to woman.

I guess it was somewhat similar here, in Russia a few generations ago. Now it's better at least in terms of accessible abortions and contraception. And child supports that lots of men still don't pay, but at least some do and some are forced to do. Plus, we have a slim share of single fathers.

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I found this comment, opinions ?

I met her on a dating app, she seemed nice, when I met her in person I was a bit freaked out because she wasn't what I expected. I decided to follow through on the date anyway and that maybe I just needed time to get used to her. Towards the end of the date I wasn't feeling it and I figured I'd just drive her home and that would be the end of it. But when we got to her place she didn't leave the car. She stayed there for hours trying to get answers out of me. She spoke about bad past experiences where guys would ghost her, and I didn't want to be like that so I promised her more dates.

We dated for a while and I was surprised to find I sometimes enjoyed it, but things happened and I decided that I did want to break up. I first tried to give constructive feedback about the relationship to see if any changes could be made, but all that did was hurt her feelings which made me feel horrible. We got really distant from each other for a while and I was just feeling like shit so I figured that meant I liked her and that I didn't want to break up. So I said to her I didn't want to break up (I was crying while it was happening) and she agreed and we went slower after that.

Now I'm back to that stage where I feel nothing towards her, and whenever she messages me I feel like it's a chore to talk to her.

I don't know if I got mad at myself but definitely I hated that my feelings were all messed up throughout everything.

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Well the only upgrade from then is that he used to just put the dishes in the sink for us to deal with and I explained that obviously it's better to put them in the dishwasher if possible.

And I don't want to ask him to do more chores than we do, but like... the fact that he doesn't offer to do anything ever is kind of a bummer. I don't want to feel like the slave driver here, because my partner avoids asking the roommate to do anything. Basically my partner looks like a saint compared to me.

I even told my bf to ask the roommate to help him rake leaves, and he said he didn't want to bother him with it...

Not to mention like... I don't even want to deep clean my house anymore because if it's spotless then I will notice every crumb he leaves behind. I find myself wanting to do a lot of stuff and then stop myself when I remember he's still here. I had to hide my vitamins because he kept taking them.

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Yea, I posted that before reading your other comments. It does seem like he’s more of a chronic problems.

It’s a tricky one for me. On the one hand, obviously he sounds like he needs to carry his share of the weight, as he seems like a bit of a mooch. That’s it’s own problem, obviously. But on the other, in more balanced relationships, I often find you have to divide up tasks so that people’s individual particularities don’t clash too much.

I’ll give you an anecdote from my own relationship. My girlfriend is incredibly particular about how she does laundry. I’m a dude, I throw everything in the drier without thinking, but she had all these rules about what does and doesn’t go in the drier. Problem is, her desires don’t actually correspond to what the manufacturers recommend for cleaning on the label, so there’s no real way to tell the difference besides remembering exactly what she does and doesn’t want in the drier.

Problem is many of the different categories are barely distinguishable by me, especially if I’m not being excessive meticulous (eg this type of lace goes in the drier, this other one does not). Essentially what I told her is if she wants me to do her laundry, she’s going to have to accept a small amount of collateral damage. If she’s unwilling to do that, we can just reallocate other chores so I’m doing more of something she isn’t particular about and she primarily does the laundry so it gets done “right.”

Thats not a great solution for you, though, because obviously this guy isn’t carrying his weight at all (and sorting the kitchen is admittedly a bit more of a straightforward task). Sounds like getting him to do anything is a problem at all, much less doing something correctly. Tbh, not sure what a great solution is besides telling him to pull his weight or gtfo.

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More or less. I'm 25, he's 27.

I apologized because he was trying to be mature with the "Your feelings are valid, I'm sorry you're feeling this way, I don't know what else I can do to help you" and I'm just staring at him pissed off that I'm the only one who is bothered by anything the roommate does, so his high and mighty disposition ultimately makes me feel shitty. My bf even has a blender that he uses daily and he cleans it after each use. The roommate will use it and then leave it in the sink to get covered in grime and then maybe 2 days later finally clean it. And THAT doesn't bother him. I'm bothered FOR him.

It's like, anyone I mention this situation to absolutely understands my venting. My partner is the only person who does not share any grievances. And I've vented to like 6 people about the living situation by now lol.

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I'm asking where did you get the idea she took him back? Usually in these cases they just show up to the woman's house, it happens plenty of times. Sometimes beforehand they repeatedly show up and harass her, she and/or neighbors call the police and he leaves, but regardless usually they just show up and break in or get her to open the door.

If you fuck shitbags, you get treated like a shitbag and you might end up dead. that's NOT MEN'S FAULT.

Uh... It's definitely his fault. You may not feel like it, but believe it or not, people are responsible for their actions regardless of others and he will pretty much definitely be charged with homicide, no matter how much you or anyone else would prefer he be absolved of it.

And once again, I repeat

And just like many days from the fine men of this community, we learned that the well-documented subject studied for decades by psychology professionals of how abusers and manipulators of both sexes select and rope in their victims, simply does not exist.

For some reason when women do it men are victims though 🤔

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You don't care because you can't answer them 💀 you realized there was no basis for saying she took him back and now you conveniently no longer care. You know you apply a double standard to men, you know that medical professionals have it stacked against you, but know you can't justify/fight it so you, again, conveniently no longer care.

And I mean that's fine then. You can blame other people for their own murders all you want but you have to acknowledge that you'll eternally be on a fringe extremist part of society and ostracized by men and women alike because most people do have empathy. Even people who cannot psychologically experience innate empathy still possess cognitive empathy.

And I know you know full well that psychopaths are known to be charming and sweet up until a point and that that's how they lure people in. It's been studied as a commonality amongst serial killers in particular. You cannot live in normal society and not have learned about that by now.

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You mean like real studies...

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1854883/

You'll notice that the vast majority of DV is reciprocal:

Results. Almost 24% of all relationships had some violence, and half (49.7%) of those were reciprocally violent. In nonreciprocally violent relationships, women were the perpetrators in more than 70% of the cases. Reciprocity was associated with more frequent violence among women (adjusted odds ratio [AOR]=2.3; 95% confidence interval [CI]=1.9, 2.8), but not men (AOR=1.26; 95% CI=0.9, 1.7). Regarding injury, men were more likely to inflict injury than were women (AOR=1.3; 95% CI=1.1, 1.5), and reciprocal intimate partner violence was associated with greater injury than was nonreciprocal intimate partner violence regardless of the gender of the perpetrator (AOR=4.4; 95% CI=3.6, 5.5).

Bottom line is the women know he's an asshole, seek him out anyways, then get all 'pikachu face' when he treats her like an asshole.

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That's... Not how that works. It can be and very often is both reciprocal and an abuser/victim dynamic. Have... Have you never heard of the term "fighting back"?

A lot of manipulators specifically know how to get under the skin of their victims and provoke them to mild violence solely for the sake of deluding them with exactly that. When "reciprocal violence" so often means "person X beats person Y on a regular basis and treats them like an animal, but one time person Y slapped them out of anger after they pushed and pushed them to the point of snapping", yeah, that's still a victimizing situation lol.

That is literally part of the studied cycle of abuse for narcissists, provoking the victim into lashing out and/or a brief act of violence so that they can use that instance to gaslight them into a "you're just as bad as me" thing when in reality it's almost always non-comparable. This is literally a known tactic of narcissists. In fact, provoking to violence for gaslighting purposes is very frequently employed by female manipulators.

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[–]jax006MGTowing my boat to the lake 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

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[–]jax006MGTowing my boat to the lake 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]ididntwanttoexistmillennial | ♀️ | EU | mauve misanthrope 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]SonicBackScratcherGreen Eyed Member of the LGBFJB community 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

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[–]Even-Kiwi-9164Simp for Smurf 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]jax006MGTowing my boat to the lake 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]SKY_ACTIV3We all self conscious I'm just the first to admit it 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

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[–]FizzleMateriel -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]BrownEyedGringa 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Yeah... there's a lot of smoke and mirrors involved in dating as a woman. You've always gotta be careful and watch your back. And you can't trust someone unless you know them very, very well and spent a long time with them. It's honestly tiring. I'm a pretty laidback, chill person and I feel like I can't be like that in dating because it gets taken advantage of so I end up being way more assertive and demanding than I normally like to be.

I'd argue dating is still better for the average woman than it is for the average man due to the options available, but it switches when we're talking about more attractive people.

An attractive, social man can essentially spin plates until he's tired of it. He can even select for hot women with great personalities.

An attractive woman has trouble finding a man in her attractiveness category who is genuine and loyal and not just looking for a hot lay. Lots of times, they have to date down to get what they want. Attractive men just spin plates until they find someone they really, really like. I'd be an attractive man over an attractive woman any day, and that's not even considering the career options!!

[–]SKY_ACTIV3We all self conscious I'm just the first to admit it 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]SKY_ACTIV3We all self conscious I'm just the first to admit it 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

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[–]DaphneDK42King of LBFMs 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (32 children) | Copy Link

[–]-Giga-ThePinkPill.co 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]undersupervixen 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (23 children) | Copy Link

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[–]undersupervixen 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Kaisha001 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]undersupervixen 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

You should check it out. It's a slightly different question but related to these topics. It's about genetically deaf parents who are part of a long-running deaf community struggling over choosing whether or not to surgically enhance their kids by giving them cochlear implants. It sounds simple but the implications for the deaf culture are profound and an existential threat. It's a nice microcosm for thinking about these topics (conflicts between parents, community, medicine, outsiders, etc). None of these kids need to hear.

Another looming topic is going to be germline and genetic engineering of children by parents. Suppose parents can inject their kids to ensure they grow 6'+ with 7" dicks?

Ultimately, I don't have a problem with parents enhancing their kids. Children exist because parents choose to create them and invest significant resources and effort into raising them. And in a natural selection context, anything is fair game. Even if it's nothing more that snipping off a small part of their dicks if we think it means they might be less likely to become NEET losers and waifu obsessed internet neckbeards.

[–]jacques_laconic 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

That's not really an argument to keep doing it.

It's a foolish old religious ritual from over 2,000 years ago. We used to do a lot of dumb shit 2,000 years ago, and, if we're being rational, we stop doing them when they don't make sense and we stand literally nothing to lose from it.

There are no medical or hygienic benefits to circumcision whatsoever. It's a silly, backwards practice with no legitimate reason to continue, and the only reason we keep doing it is inertia and indifference. It's as pointless and cosmetic as footbinding or hyper tight corsets.

If there's the slightest chance of ruining even one poor kid's physical and sexual health for literally no reason at all you'd think people would have the empathy or at least non-destructive indifference to not go out of their way to fuck with a kid's dick.

Why people are so attached to the idea of chopping babies' dicks, or just so closed minded that they can't imagine any reason to stop doing it just because "it's always been that way" I'll never understand.

[–]death_by_1000_catsThose aren't for you 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]death_by_1000_catsThose aren't for you 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link

[–]undersupervixen 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link

[–]needletothebar 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]undersupervixen 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]needletothebar 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]death_by_1000_catsThose aren't for you 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago* (6 children) | Copy Link

Because why should a "cultural tradition" override a baby's bodily autonomy? Children don't have medical autonomy for things like vaccines and surgeries that are medically necessary but I can't fathom why that should extend to circumcision which is not medically necessary at all and had risks of serious, life-ruining harm. Yes the risks are small but they exist and I don't understand why we'd tolerate any amount of risk for something that is purely cosmetic.

Personally I'm pretty extreme about this, I don't think parents should be allowed to get a baby's ears pierced either. Let them make unnecessary irreversible changes to their own bodies when they're old enough to decide they want to do that. Parents shouldn't have a right to just mutilate their kids for no reason (and indeed they don't; circumcision is a rare and arbitrary exception).

[–]undersupervixen 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]needletothebar 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]undersupervixen 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]needletothebar 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]death_by_1000_catsThose aren't for you 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]SonicBackScratcherGreen Eyed Member of the LGBFJB community 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]SmurfESmurfersonStacy’s Post-Wall Mom 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

[–]Orange_PaisleyNARWHALT 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]death_by_1000_catsThose aren't for you 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

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[–]death_by_1000_catsThose aren't for you 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]SmurfESmurfersonStacy’s Post-Wall Mom 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

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[–]DaphneDK42King of LBFMs 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (40 children) | Copy Link

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[–]SonicBackScratcherGreen Eyed Member of the LGBFJB community 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

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[–]SmurfESmurfersonStacy’s Post-Wall Mom 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (33 children) | Copy Link

[–]SKY_ACTIV3We all self conscious I'm just the first to admit it 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]SmurfESmurfersonStacy’s Post-Wall Mom 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]TheBookOfSeilYou are the spoon 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (30 children) | Copy Link

[–]CatoftheBanals 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link

[–]death_by_1000_catsThose aren't for you 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]TheBookOfSeilYou are the spoon 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]death_by_1000_catsThose aren't for you 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]TheBookOfSeilYou are the spoon 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]death_by_1000_cats1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

You put your penis in her vagina and then while thrusting you lean forward, reach around her thigh and stimulate her clit.

I guess if she was incredibly fat it might be difficult but a healthy sized woman and a man whose arms aren't freakishly short would have no trouble. Guys can grab a girl's hair or throat during doggy style but you think he'd have to have long Stretch Armstrong arms to touch her clit which is centimeters from her vagina which his penis is inside of?

NSFW They're having sex doggy style and he's leaning forward and has his arm wrapped around her body and his hand on her stomach/sternum. He would only need to adjust his body slightly to touch her clit and it wouldn't even be as far a reach as what he's doing here. A "modified" doggy position like upright or prone makes it even easier.

You realize gay men do the "reach around" during anal sex, right? That's where the concept comes from.

[–]TheBookOfSeil1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]TheBookOfSeilYou are the spoon 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]SmurfESmurfersonStacy’s Post-Wall Mom 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (20 children) | Copy Link

[–]ChaddamhuseinPost body before calling me an incel 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]SmurfESmurfersonStacy’s Post-Wall Mom 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]ChaddamhuseinPost body before calling me an incel 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]SmurfESmurferson1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]TheBookOfSeilYou are the spoon 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link

[–]SmurfESmurfersonStacy’s Post-Wall Mom 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link

[–]ChaddamhuseinPost body before calling me an incel 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]SmurfESmurferson2 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]TheBookOfSeilYou are the spoon 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

[–]SmurfESmurferson1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]TheBookOfSeil2 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]TheBookOfSeil1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

What does that have to do with how men behave?

You'll have to explain what you mean by "behave" because you still keep saying just that word when I've given examples of actual behaviors.

Men who are having ONS generally don’t have a problem going down. It’s a very mild act these days, basically PG-13

Who exactly are you talking about? Men in general? Have you slept with or are you sleeping with men in general? If not, then you can't really say this because it might just be a theme in your particular area and with the guys that you've slept with. I would expect modern progressives in large cities and metro areas to be more open to other kinds of sex acts like pegging, oral, BDSM, sounding, etc, but the guys who are strictly passion and peen-station aren't going to do it as much, or want to do it without being asked to. It's a cultural phenomenon.

Watch what they do. And if you aren’t fucking men, you’re not seeing what they actually do

Again, it doesn't matter what each guy is specifically doing. I don't care if Rick goes down immediately, Chris needs to be asked, Brad makes excuses, and Tim just says no. It doesn't matter.

[–]SmurfESmurferson2 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]TheBookOfSeil1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]SmurfESmurferson3 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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[–]SmurfESmurferson1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]GridReXX"Big Bully (ಠ_ಠ)" 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (32 children) | Copy Link

[–]thatguyfromrichmond7 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]GridReXX"Big Bully (ಠ_ಠ)" 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]zyramain69 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]-Giga-ThePinkPill.co -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]zyramain69 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]IcarusKiki21F INFJ 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]GridReXX"Big Bully (ಠ_ಠ)" 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]TheBookOfSeilYou are the spoon 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link

[–]GridReXX"Big Bully (ಠ_ಠ)" 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]TheBookOfSeilYou are the spoon 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

I was using the tangible and literal definition of violence. Men outpace there, demonstrably.

So you're using a definition in a context where it would mostly apply to men to say that men are more violent. Got it.

Do men cause emotional or psychological damage as their secondary whether intentionally or as a consequence of their physical damage? Also yea.

You're comparing cups to bowls though. They're the same thing, but just present in different contexts. Men commit more physical violence against people and women commit more mental and emotional violence against people. It only seems like a big difference to you and other women because physical damage can be quantified while the other violence that women commit is harder to quantify. Does that mean physical violence is worse or that men are more violent in the general sense of the word? Nope and nope.

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[–]TheBookOfSeilYou are the spoon 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I am using the common and most relevant definition of violence.

Yes, relevant to the argument you're trying to make.

I’m not an SJW.

That's exactly what an SJW would want people to think.

I don’t call it “literally violence” because someone has disenfranchised me or caused me distress. I call that disenfranchisement and distress.

You're free to use the words you prefer. That doesn't change the definition of violence, nor what constitutes violence.

Oh I see your point. It hinges on me affirming your definition of violence. Which I do not.

Right because to do that would also be to concede the argument, which you're also not going to do.

There are actual words to describe non-physical harm. And it isn’t “violence.”

There are, but that would make your argument one of semantics.

I’m not being myopic. I acknowledge harm is varied. I simply don’t agree with your conception.

You're free to disagree, sure.

Stay blessed.

No u.

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[–]jacques_laconic 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link

Men are more violent across the board. This is obvious and shouldn't require restatement, and the guys who argue against it are often doing so in bad faith.

But the whole conversation is usually in bad faith, because the women they are arguing it against almost universally use it as a trump card to declare women's moral superiority. It's them arguing WaW under a different guise. If women are so evil then why are men the vast majority of killers, rapists, and and assaulters, they say.

What's more important than who's actually willing to commit the violence is the attitude towards it when the violence either doesn't affect one at all, or if they stand to benefit from it. And that women often voice an attraction to men who give "protector" vibes and the appearance of being both capable and willing to deploy violence in her favor shows that women have no moral high ground to stand on.

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[–]not0my0real0account77 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Hi! 🐸

I have a question about an imaginary scenario.

Suppose that you find out one day that your very beloved husband/wife is a werewolf, but he/she doesn't know. Let's imagine that one full moon night you notice some movement in their room and when you look through the ajar door you see them changing in their monster form and jumping through the window. As you are worried for their health you run after them and follow them through the city and you are horrified to see that they decide to eat a random innocent person on the street. Then they simply go home and go to bed and turn back to human form. You decide the next day to confront them about what they did, but when you start your story and mention about the change you realize they have no idea what you are talking about and know nothing about them being a werewolf or the fact that they hold a person in their stomach now. They even believe that you actually had a nightmare. So you realize that the human form is innocent and would probably be destroyed to find out what they do during a full moon.

What would you do?

You tell them and let them decide what to do even if that might destroy their soul as they are actually a good person and wouldn't even hurt a fly, so knowing what they did might get them to lose their mind or even to kill themself.
You take matters into your own hands without telling your beloved spouse. You wait for the full moon nights and go to their room while they sleep. As they start to change you quickly immobilize them, and then read them stories to calm them down until the morning. But this choice has dangers: your spouse might accidentally eat you and he/she would be devastated the next morning to find your remains and maybe even realize it's their own doing; you also might not be able to restrict them in time and they get away and sadly eat another person for the night; you might get bitten while you fight and become a werewolf too etc
You involve the police or army although this means that your spouse who mentally is innocent (as the human form is kind) would reach behind bars or even a test subject for scientists and would have a very unhappy life
You ignore things because this is the way of nature and werewolves are predators and they need to eat
You let them bite you and make you a werewolf and go out werewolfing together during full moons as you love your spouse but hate the other people
You bring a live animal in their room, right before they change, so they could eat it
You buy a lot of steak, bring it all in the room while your spouse is asleep (only during full moons, of course), you put it all on a table and wait for the change. You also leave some for you on a little plate, and you have a nice meal together with the werewolf. You take this chance to even try to communicate and see if there is a way to reason with them. We will imagine that the steak is so good that the werewolf won't see you as compatible food anymore, however you will have to work more to afford all that monthly steak.
Other?

Thank you very much! 🐸

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Disclaimer: I am a furry. So this is like one of my fantasies lol.

I will tell him and discuss how we can make sure that his transformation in the future would be not disruptive. Here’s how I would propose to him.

First, we are going to buy a land in the middle of nowhere (Funny thing is my house being in one). Then, we will build two rooms can be used to secure his werewolf form: one room for him and another room for me as a safety measure. In between two rooms, there will be another transparent room holding live animals and I have a remote control opening the room if needed. Perhaps we can install additional safety measurements like electric fence.

Before full moon, he has to stay in one of the secure room. And we will attempt to figure out ways to calm him down in his werewolf form or has his human consciousness be in control. Perhaps some meat will do or some chemical compounds. (What a coincidence that I work in a lab that does chemical synthesis lol)

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[–]not0my0real0account73 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

Hi! 🐸 Thank you for your answer.

If your flair uses the literal sense of words, we have the same age and the same neurological disorder. If it doesn't disturb you, I hope it would be ok to share with you some background info.

I'm autistic. Professionally I function quite well (I'm a teacher, I also work in IT). However, it is really hard for me to understand society and human interactions. I tried reading psychology and sociology books, but I also read literature and watched movies with realist themes to learn from them, yet I still can't integrate and can't truly understand other humans. It sometimes becomes frustrating/annoying. But I enjoy fantasy movies/books a lot, as the rules of the world/society are reshaped. I have remained a fan of this genre since childhood and I even still read fairy tales. In my free time when I can't read (for example while walking on the street or waiting in line inside a shop) I daydream and I've created some fantasy worlds in my head and I get really lost in thoughts. I know others might find it unhealthy but I enjoy it and like it that way. This made me find real life boring, and, in time, made me avoid books/movies with realist themes. However I still try to understand things through fantasy. To me the answers to such questions reveal things about other people's way of thinking and personality. Some questions may be inspired by books or movies that I watched. For example tomorrow I'm gonna ask (but in a more elaborate way) what would people do if they found out that their lover died 20-30 years ago and they accidentally married their lover's twin that took the place. The idea is from a book I read in highschool. I ask these questions here as it is a relationship debate subreddit although I'm trying to find a more general subreddit (that doesn't necessarily have core ideologies) where I could re-ask these questions. I really love talking about such hypothetical situations.

Thank you!

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What I'm saying is that "normal" for a lot of women isn't really happy. I mean, I could just as easily ask you what is there to be happy about? I have moments of happiness, plenty of things in life make me happy, but I'm not sure why happiness as a default would make any more sense than unhappiness as a default.

I have said before that I am a depressive/melancholy person by nature and have been since I was a literal toddler. That's my baseline default. I'm not unhappy "about" anything, I wouldn't really even say I'm unhappy at all, but I am just not a congenitally happy person. My default emotion when I wake up in the morning and as I go about my day isn't happiness, it's malaise and melancholy. I think this is true for a lot of women and I think that's natural, normal, and probably has to do with our tendency toward trait neuroticism and stems from our hormonal makeup and the fact that we're the sex that gestates and raises infants.

[–]CimZim1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

What I'm saying is that "normal" for a lot of women isn't really happy. I mean, I could just as easily ask you what is there to be happy about?

I'm not happy as my default either, content is mine. Happiness is like watching a really beautiful sunrise, unhappiness is a completely grey sky, contentment is calm blue everywhere.

I have said before that I am a depressive/melancholy person by nature and have been since I was a literal toddler. That's my baseline default. I'm not unhappy "about" anything, I wouldn't really even say I'm unhappy at all, but I am just not a congenitally happy person. My default emotion when I wake up in the morning and as I go about my day isn't happiness, it's malaise and melancholy.

I don't mean this as an insult, but that sounds extremely tiring on a mental level. That's how my brain was as a child but it was due to living in a bad/abusive environment. Once I moved out, life itself became much more difficult but the melancholy left within weeks.

I think this is true for a lot of women and I think that's natural, normal, and probably has to do with our tendency toward trait neuroticism and stems from our hormonal makeup and the fact that we're the sex that gestates and raises infants.

Why would being the raisers of children mean we're more prone to being unhappy and/or melancholy? Just thinking about how I tried hard to raise my siblings well, I had to pretend to not feel that way. Kids need constant interaction and new things to see or activities to do, their brains are like sponges lol. It seems like a happier or at least active and excited mindset is better for a guardian to have.

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You can only be happy if you don't think too much about your existence.

I'm a happy guy. I've been aware of my own mortality since before I was in double digits, I know the universe at the best will suffer either a heat death or the big crunch, but our planet will be long dead before them. Everything I love will die, anything I care about is pointless, there is no God or a God who doesn't care about his creations at a level meaningful to us to care about it. I have at best 40-50 more years of life in me but probably only 30 "good" years, at best.

And I feel fantastic and I'm still alive.

Its your own state of internal miserable that keeps you from being happy with what there is. Its not ignorance, I probably know more than you do about this, I've been fascinated by it since I was a young child, but I can shrug my shoulders and say "eh, what ya gunna do" and move on, because my neuro makeup allows me to. There isn't a day I don't think "Immortality would be awfully nice" (and no on pick up on this and tell me why it sucks blah blah I know), but I'm still happy because I'm a happy guy.

[–]nessaea-blue3 points 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

it's hard to talk about this because everyone thinks they are awake to reality. Very very few people will look at their own understanding and realizations are be aware how incomplete they are. Because it's everything you know - how could you know the depth of what you don't know?

Everyone has thought about death and God and existence. I very much doubt many people have fully understood it. Strong hallucinogens are helpful in this.

And beyond death and God, life itself is depressing. You see memes all the time "well I'm just suppose to work until i retire then die" and people just laugh soberly and then keep doing it.

I've talked to someone here a few days ago during the happiness threads and she says, "I'm a 9/10 happiness because my job is tolerable and my partner is decent and i have food and shelter"

The bar for happiness for someone who doesn't realize just how pathetic our lives are is low. Everyone here, myself included, lives a pathetic, limited, slave lives. At least I'm not fool enough to call it a happy life.

My one high thought that is really worth something is the following: once you come to the fork in the road where you realize you can do anything you want, there is no right decision on whether to stay on the path or wander. Either choice will be the wrong decision. The right decision was never having realized you have a choice in the first place.

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[–]DjangoUBlackBastard1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

he only reason I've "failed" is that i haven't even started.

You've been living for 21 years. That's 21 years of either work ethic, opportunities, or luck affecting your life and how happy you are or aren't. And why is failed quoted when I never said or implied that?

You can lecture me on my life in ten years.

Who's lecturing you on anything? I literally just said whatever combination of luck/hard work/opportunities you had wasn't enough to make you happy. No part of that is judging you for "failing" at anything. If you lacked luck that's not through any fault of your own. If you lacked opportunities that's not through any fault of your own.

I never said happiness doesn't exist. I said happiness (for most people) is the child of ignorance.

A distinction without a difference. You're legit just saying everyone that's happy is dumber than you the ingrate 21 year old that's never done anything but bitch and moan about how hard it is to grow up rich. You're a spoiled brat and this comment chain proves it. So when it comes down to why you're unhappy I'll say bad luck because you got unlucky to have shit parents apparently. Parents shit enough to allow you to become a grown child.

And stop trying to lean on being 21 like that means you can't live life if you want to. I was out of college at 20 and had a house at 22 if you cared enough to change your unhappiness you could realistically work your ass off to change your material conditions. People less blessed than you have figured it out.

[–]nessaea-blue1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

You've been living for 21 years. That's 21 years of either work ethic, opportunities, or luck affecting your life and how happy you are or aren't.

my point is that ive done great over these 21 years. I got to the peak of what society would have expected of me. Everyone gives me a pat on the back. Yet i look over the edge and i don't like what i see. I'm glad i did it though, otherwise i would have never had a the sobering realization that their peak isn't worth it. I may have spent my life thinking well what if i had followed the path - i could have been happier

Now i can grab my pretty degree and fuck right off. My misery is a symptom of being post-realization and pre-graduation.

And why is failed quoted when I never said or implied that?

failed at being happy

I literally just said whatever combination of luck/hard work/opportunities you had wasn't enough to make you happy.

i see what you mean, but what I'm saying is the issue wasn't luck, hard work, or opportunities. I had all of those.

the issue was that i failed to realize these things werent what was gonna make me happy or self actualized. I was following the dream that was sold to me, not the one i truly want. Now i U-Turn.

A distinction without a difference. You're legit just saying everyone that's happy is dumber than you the ingrate 21 year old that's never done anything but bitch and moan about how hard it is to grow up rich. You're a spoiled brat and this comment chain proves it. So when it comes down to why you're unhappy I'll say bad luck because you got unlucky to have shit parents apparently. Parents shit enough to allow you to become a grown child.

lol wut. I don't even know what to respond to this angry lecture as it's not based in reality

I was out of college at 20 and had a house at 22

i don't want a house by 22. Stop putting your own definition of happiness on me.

I want a camper and to start businesses. That's what I'll be doing next summer. Lecture me then.

[–]DjangoUBlackBastard1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

my point is that ive done great over these 21 years.

I wouldn't say anyone that's unhappy with where they are in life have done great. You've done great by the standards your parents placed on you, but that's meaningless if it's not what you really want to do.

Yet i look over the edge and i don't like what i see. I'm glad i did it though, otherwise i would have never had a the sobering realization that their peak isn't worth it.

See it's right here. "Their" peak. You're judging what your life should be by what society says it should be and because you're not happy living that life you're assuming everyone isn't if they're truly aware. The real truth is that life is about self discovery and what makes you happy is unique to you. Parents putting a lot of pressure on you at an early age is something I find people I've met that suffer from chronic depression and anxiety all have in common.

i see what you mean, but what I'm saying is the issue wasn't luck, hard work, or opportunities. I had all of those.

You didn't have the right opportunity and luck needed to make you happy.

the issue was that i failed to realize these things werent what was gonna make me happy or self actualized. I was following the dream that was sold to me, not the one i truly want.

So we can agree on this and this is what I was basically getting to here. Just because you're unhappy in your current life doesn't mean that it's you enlightenment that has you miserable. If anything your ignorance to your personal purpose in life is why you feel empty.

I don't even know what to respond to this angry lecture as it's not based in reality

Not really. You come off like a little kid in these posts there's a reason I asked your age. You definitely don't sound like someone with a lot of life experience.

I want a camper and to start businesses. That's what I'll be doing next summer. Lecture me then.

If it makes you happy I won't need to and you'll come back to this thread with the realization you were wrong.

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because if you had realized it earlier and done something about it, you wouldn't be having a crisis and stressed as fuck right now

While I'm of the opinion that we are all at fault for our own problems on a fundamental level, I don't see why this matters? Had I made other choices I may have stress from a completely different angle.

For example, and its only a hypothetical. Lets say I spent 2 more hours a day at work and that got rid of the stress there because it made me much more successful and I had more patients. Ok thats good, but lets say because of that I had to have my son drive my daughter to their extra curricular activities and they got in a car crash which killed one and crippled the other. Ok there's some stress! We don't know how things are going to go, thats just life. Sometimes you deal with it on the fly, and you can't beat yourself up because you made a left when you should have made a right.

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[–]nessaea-blue1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

that's the thing dude, at least one of your bombs have already gone off. You're having a midlife crisis. That's one of the huge things I'm trying to avoid. Preventative measures are always more effective than treating the deeply festering infection.

This was actually an interesting conversation from my perspective. Seems like people always think the bomb is in the future, when often times it was actually the past. It was the the things you could have done to be a fully actualized person by the time youre middle aged.

We just keep pushing off the moment where we say "I've had enough" since you are (or have convinced yourself) that you're happy. Maybe it's a form of laziness and avoiding responsibility / risk / scary decisions.

I don't even think we both agree what the bomb is. I'm guessing you see it as something that will happen to you because of the state of the world (other people) while i see it has the things you've had control over during the course of your life and decisionmaking (not other people).

[–][deleted]1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

that's the thing dude, at least one of your bombs have already gone off. You're having a midlife crisis.

Nah I'm at the age for it, my only midlife crisis moment is knowing I don't have much time left so I am trying to do more.

This was actually an interesting conversation from my perspective. Seems like people always think the bomb is in the future, when often times it was actually the past. It was the the things you could have done to be a fully actualized person by the time youre middle aged.

I'm overall happy with who and what I am, even if it could have been better or different. I don't get why thats hard. Just because I can see better paths in hindsight doesn't mean I should be bothered by them.

We just keep pushing off the moment where we say "I've had enough" since you are (or have convinced yourself) that you're happy. Maybe it's a form of laziness and avoiding responsibility / risk / scary decisions.

I don't see where you are coming from at all. I made some huge risks in my life, some very stressful ones, but I'm glad they didn't make me completely miserable.

I'm guessing you see it as something that will happen to you because of the state of the world (other people) while i see it has the things you've had control over during the course of your life and decisionmaking (not other people).

The bomb is just death and suffering, it will happen, so what? I'm not stressed about what I can control its what I can't and that is inevitable. We both die at the end of the game, only I'll have had a better time of it.

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