Most Women Use Dating Apps Like Men Wish They Could

Shoddy-Cherry-490 · 2024-10-14T16:49:15+00:00

I think for women that are open to non-committed encounters, online dating works almost perfectly. But among the female friends that I’d consider “sex positive” like that, I’d say almost all of them will still be pretty selective. And that selection process takes time. They will aim for the most attractive guys, but as one would expect, those in particular can be hard to pin down.

one_ball_policy · 2024-10-14T17:23:46+00:00

If the girl you are messaging isn’t down to meet and gives you her number in 5 messages or less you will likely never meet her. Don’t waste you’re time

Unhappy_Offer_1822 · 2024-10-14T18:08:28+00:00

so women on dating apps like to waste their time getting affection from random men when they are bored and most men on dating apps know this and get mad but continue to use the apps? seems like a true cesspool of idiots

I_HEART_HATERS · 2024-10-14T15:56:49+00:00

I’m certainly jealous of women’s dating app experience. They actually can find guys interested in them on apps easily instead of swiping for hours just to match with women who won’t answer your first message. Heterosexual men please boycott dating apps they are totally stacked against us

Lift_and_Lurk · 2024-10-14T15:43:02+00:00

The majority of women use free OLD apps as entertainment with no real intention of it becoming a real date.

If dudes would just understand that and adjust instead of going “all in” on OLD then they’d probably have a better time.

a_minty_fart · 2024-10-14T16:17:01+00:00

If that's the case, why are women on the apps so fucking miserable?

Fair-Bus-4017 · 2024-10-14T17:31:32+00:00

Everyone knows that online dating apps gets mainly used for casual sex. This was its reputation since tinder got popular if not earlier. The people that havn't caught on and are salty about it need to open their eyes lmao.

catdog8020 · 2024-10-14T22:18:56+00:00

I agree Chad and that’s why average men are having to go overseas and/or use escorts for dating. It’s funny I don’t even see you Chads in bars ( I’m above average in the bars and still can’t get laid). I guess you chads just have the hoes come to your place. If the United States would legalize prostitution if would reduce female hypergamy.

Dertross · 2024-10-14T23:20:04+00:00

Nope. Men and women are not the same.

Men objectively do less "shopping around" than women do.

If the gender dynamics on OLD and not IRL were flipped, a sizable number of men would just use it to find a good one to spend the rest of their lives with and then stop using it.

RelativeYak7 · 2024-10-14T15:53:28+00:00

You are discounting how much higher women's disgust sensitivity is compared to men. Some women bail on apps merely from swiping through ugly men, others bail after one bad date where the guy misrepresented himself. The only women who persist in using apps are those with naturally lower disgust and rejection sensitivity and those motivated to have kids. Casual sex is so low on the priority list it doesn't even register except to extreme outliers.

Clementinequeen95 · 2024-10-14T16:01:38+00:00

As a woman on a dating app I can assure you that half of men’s profiles are absolute disasters. Terrible pics, no prompt answers, or they make it appear that they just want a bro. The amount of times I’ve seen men answer the prompt “the way to my heart is - cooking for me”. That’s really not attractive to most women lmao. I think a lot of men fail to realize they are putting things on these profiles that women are not gonna be attracted to. “Typical Sunday- the gym and football”, ok most men do that yup. “I’ll fall for you - if you trip me”- nearly ⅓ of male profiles have that. “Above 6ft because apparently that matters”- doesn’t make you sound nice lmao. Pics like hunting, fishing, pics of your car- while all lovely to you are probably not the most attractive to women.

Realistic_Guava9117 · 2024-10-14T19:30:28+00:00

Ok but which dating app are you saying you get easy hookups off of? Tinder or Hinge? And what do you consider a lot of matches or the top 5% of men? I have almost 200 matches on hinge and 200+ on tinder though a lot of average to below average women swipe on me and I don’t want to fuck them. The girls on hinge that I do want to fuck typically want a boyfriend or at least, thats what they put in their bio. Also, on hinge most of the attractive girls have monogamy or figuring out their relationship type rather than non-monogamy which most likely means they aren’t dtf.

All the attractive girls are under the rose page and typically have monogamy in their bios…But anyways, main question: how many matches is above avg for a male and hows it a win unless you’re hooking up with at least 7s? Another thing is, I happen to be african american and tinder seems to be crowded with white women to be honest. So since i’m not the typical type of black dude white girls look for (at least not yet), I usually get likes from avg ones. And no seriously, I barely see black girls on the app let alone, rarely a 7 or above in my area.

And i’m only saying all of this because, if you have seen the okcupid racial dating preferences, you’d know that on dating apps caucasian men and women and asian women get the most attention followed by latinos and latinas. In other words, unless I look like a football player and have some crazy lifestyle pictures matching most of tinder isn’t happening…

OscarTheHusky · 2024-10-14T19:56:56+00:00

Women will talk to 10 men and those same 10 men will only talk to that one women, welcome to the sad reality of dating app, as average guys we stand no chance, because there will always be more men seeking women than the opposite. There is just too many damn guys on those apps, doesn't matter if you were here before this enrages me and how easy they have it. The demand is just way too high, I understand people who buy sex dolls at the end of the day.

Financial_Leave4411 · 2024-10-14T16:15:18+00:00

Most women aren’t finding what they are looking for online and instead leave quickly because they gets swamped with unattractive player wannabe’s that act as junk mail filling up her in box. When you get that much junk mail that you can’t unsubscribe from you just give up and delete your account.

Hoemath just tells men what will rile them up the most in order to get more engagement to make money off of men who are aiming well above who they qualify for or men how don’t have value because they don’t want to commit.

The small amount of men hooking up are sleeping with the same small amount of women willing to hook up. If most women actually wanted to hook up then sex would be a lot easier for the vast majority of men to get and the ratio of men to women on dating apps wouldn’t be as skewed as it is. With twice as many men to women on dating apps it’s clear to see most women aren’t interested in hook ups as if a woman was just sleeping around she wouldn’t delete her app as she would be constantly using it to find more hook ups or keep track of current ones.

ThatBitchA · 2024-10-14T16:43:13+00:00

they aren’t necessarily trying to find their soul mate

More men should understand this.

Seems some men here expect that once they approach a woman, that woman will respond, "My soul mate, where HAVE you been?"

They act like because they think she's pretty/hot/a Stacy that should be enough to win her over. It's not. It never has been and never will be.

Men should use online dating to have fun, meet some people, and try out new restaurants or activities.

HighValueWomanBook · 2024-10-14T17:12:16+00:00

Yes, OP. We know that low value women use dating apps like ordering food! lol... And I love it. And have no issue with that.

proffessorCouch · 2024-10-15T07:23:25+00:00

This is why i have no sympathy for women. Bunch of pampered princesses that whine about how its so hard being beautiful and desired. “Ooh, men are lining up to buy me dinners and date me, but life is so hard cause its hard to find a man willing to dedicate his entire life tending and caring for my needs”

Bunch of spoilt pampered coddled princesses!

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DamagedByPessimism · 2024-10-14T18:36:08+00:00

Sometimes I wonder how long some things took for people (here) to realize, when they could easily perceived and understood logically.

Solanthas · 2024-10-14T20:05:25+00:00

Crazy. I've had very little success with apps but all of my relationships have been through mutual friends, school and work, and have all started as flirty friendships first

Diligent-Physics189 · 2024-10-15T03:42:46+00:00

I consider myself average looking and I think most irl would agree, but god damn if those apps aren't absolutely soul sucking. I got nowhere for 2 years then deleted. Average ain't enough, not even for women with kids.

Circle_of_Steel_ · 2024-10-14T19:50:40+00:00

As some others have already said, most women are on apps for entertainment and validation. That is why no one should take women's complaints about dating seriously if they are on apps. Don't kid yourself, they could without a doubt find someone in a similar range of attractiveness but they think they deserve the man all the other (hotter, better and have more to offer) women want as well. The math doesn't favor them. We come back to this point again and again, in GENERAL, most women create their own dating problems while most men have theirs imposed upon them. It is what it is. The only thing I can advise is to level up for yourself because it makes you feel good and just be wary of women and their intentions in general, especially when you are looking for a LTR. Don't settle for a sub par woman, being alone is better than that.

Fun_Breakfast697 · 2024-10-14T17:47:29+00:00

I used dating apps basically the way you described, it rocked, I had lots of fun and got lots of attention. All my relationships started with great hookups, including my fiancé, but even my strictly casual connections were a pretty good time.

However: I am also attractive and into casual sex. No shit it rocked? Both those traits were 100% necessary for me to have that experience and find it enjoyable. If I were less attractive men would have treated me much worse (and anyone who wants to argue this point is a LIAR) and if I didn't enjoy casual sex there would have been no point to most of it.

Lots of women are missing one or both of those traits. They bitch about online dating and eventually stop doing it because it actually sucks for them.

KarmaCameleonian · 2024-10-15T00:13:18+00:00

Dating apps have always been Chad Delivery Services for women

Bruhmuh · 2024-10-15T08:27:24+00:00

We have normalised free prostitution. End times stuff.

MeteorMash101 · 2024-10-15T05:55:11+00:00

It's baffling to me how some women, even to this day, boldly claim that the dating app experience is the exact same for both genders...

F*** no it isn't.

For women - its like grocery shopping,
for men - it's like trying to find life in outer space.

kvakerok_v2 · 2024-10-14T16:12:06+00:00

Finally someone is accepting that women are turning into men.

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ExcelsiorState718 · 2024-10-14T18:58:12+00:00

True but it is what it is wish I got millions of DMs every day and could take my pick lol

wtknight · 2024-10-14T21:18:13+00:00

Dating apps and social media got women access to the most desirable eligible bachelors in her area. Single women go after them, what would you expect them to do.

Look for relationships with their attractiveness match. I use to mentally next women who seemed promiscuous to me back when I was looking for a relationship.

DapperDan1929 · 2024-10-14T23:46:22+00:00

Well, yeah. I’ve often said that men, think of how you scroll and choose porn. That’s the best comparison right there.

Fantastic_Bag_6267 · 2024-10-15T02:56:57+00:00

No, don't wish to use those stupid sites like women, that's risky business one, two why aren't you focusing on being better then those that said you could t don't do or be better than. This beef isn't with the flesh it's with the spirit of those that embody flesh, when u don't worry about what other people are doing u can redefine urself, but ur surrounded flesh eating and sounding disease for a lack of a better name for certain types of people, u become a host for trash ways of thinking

Snoo71180 · 2024-10-15T10:18:19+00:00

Pretty true aside from assuming any of this upsets men in general. I absolutely can imagine how much fun women can have if they have a good date, just like I know that many dates end up being a disaster so online dating is by no means a 100% success rate and always results in great dates like you make it sound. If you’re that active online dating, or more like hooking up, then you must have heard many nightmare stories.

If you’re point was that you get laid all the time using apps but men in general don’t and it makes them bitter you may want to check your ego

AnonTheGreat01 · 2024-10-15T15:00:40+00:00

OLD is great for women who want to use OLD the way most men do; for casual hookups. Truth is, most don't do this (for long).

It's meaningless and unfulfilling to most of them because it's so easy. They really want actual affection from a top tier man, and they will (temporarily) settle for just physical affection as a substitute if that's all they can get. The thing is, they eventually get attached to a man who doesn't want to commit if they go down the casual route, and they get heartbroken in a way a man rarely gets his heart broken.

Women who use dating apps for relationships have to be extremely discerning because plenty of guys will fake affection just to sleep with them.

They just have different challenges, which to an average guy might seem petty in comparison.

Bloody_Mandrake · 2024-10-15T16:18:52+00:00

Well it depends on who you are, you know.

I mean, for women the shoe could perfectly be in the other shoe.

I do not use Tinder that often because I tend to date women I met organically, but look, the way I see it, Tinder is not a woman's platform...

It's for the men doing the fucking.

The world is not for women, it's for men.

Looking at anything that has to do with the dating scene and thinking "bah! Women have it better than men" it's just like watching a race and say the pavement is made for the cars.

Like... That just stupid.

I can asure you, women on Tinder have WAY less agency than you think, and are getting absolutely jackshit of what they actually want from those apps.

Because you may feel a bit frustrated because when you look at these gals, they are getting what YOU want (free sex right?) but actually they are getting very little of what THEY want.

Hell, most of them do not even have an orgasm. It's sad dude.

Of course, women chase the hottest dudes, but they don't want to just fuck these dudes, they want a relationship with them. The full blown shit. And they are not getting it.

And you may think letting a dude cum on your face forty times over the period of five months just to get ditched for another girl may feel awesome because yeah... Us dudes are that nasty, but kid you not, for women it does not feel that great actually.

They enjoy it at the moment because THEY THINK they are getting the dude... But they get really butthurt when it skyrockets in the end.

Been there. Done that. Not cute.

Not saying most dudes have an easy time on dating apps, I'm not invalidating your feelings ok?

Just saying... The overwhelming majority of women do not have it easy neither.

Dating apps are a huge temptation for them, a way to "step up their game", a cheat code, that's good in the moment but will blow up in your face on the future....

And in fact, I think dating apps are the reasson why women are so damaged today.

They ger hurt pretty bad from these experiences, and once a woman is hurt and has gone through some real shit, she's not suited for a relationship anymore.

Alarmed_Load8145 · 2024-10-15T22:17:26+00:00

Actually, before I stopped using dating apps, I'd swipe left most of the time. None of them were my type or they were good looking but single mothers, which is essentially a guaranteed left swipe.

Reasonable-Cookie783 · 2024-10-16T01:35:30+00:00

No way. Also most women are using the apps wrong. You should be choosing men your level and most of you aren't which greatly leads to you getting ghosted or trolled during chats with matches or pump and dumps or situationships if Chad does actually meet you. Studies have shown men and women are both very dissatisfied with the apps so what's so great about the way women are using them?

PsychologicalOil8190 · 2024-10-16T21:47:37+00:00

They are shocked about our 10-15 matches, "omg you only have that much, I have like over 100" Yea you're a girl, congrats nice flex. Their downfall is they find it hard to choose because of all of those options and when their options start dwindling they want to settle but the men from their past are already done with relationships and dating. So no one gets anywhere after a certain age.

I can't stand the older single moms that contact me on facebook first and ask about my height and my job. Like bro I look ten times younger than you, with no kids and I'm supposed to spend my time, energy and cash on you? Delusional to the max.

Detson101 · 2024-10-17T02:18:03+00:00

Men and women tend to want different things in dating. Picture two bell curves that overlap in part. This isn’t complicated. OLD isn’t good for anybody.

VermicelliLonely7002 · 2024-10-18T21:36:14+00:00

I am maybe slightly above average at best as a man and I've been able to use it the same way. just don't act like a dweeb (redditor challenge: impossible)

Whiskeymyers75 · 2024-10-14T18:09:22+00:00

If they weren’t looking for a soulmate, I wouldn’t have to fake my intentions to lure them into bed.

ThorLives · 2024-10-14T20:30:27+00:00

A couple of hot guys on this sub who showed their dating profile said their first date hookup rate is 90%+. I’ve been on around 160 online dates, 70% of the time my date is in my bed within 3 hours.

I don't believe you. But it's hardly novel for people to like on the internet.

Hell, 70% of the women who show up on dates from dating apps look substantially worse than their pictures. If someone if hooking up with 90% or 70% of the women they (supposedly) went on a date with, then would also tell me that they'd bang any woman with a pulse.

DapperDan1929 · 2024-10-14T23:47:27+00:00

One can also simply choose to not use dating apps if it makes one that upset. 🤷🏻‍♂️

JonMyMon · 2024-10-14T18:12:36+00:00

Yeah, as long as you look interesting in a way that isn’t divisive, and shows you’re an extroverted adventure-seeker. I marketed myself as an eccentric artist once and I was woefully unsuccessful. Eccentricity creates question marks. Question marks are good for escalation, but not so much for first impressions. I think it creates too much doubt.

Real_Taste3463 · 2024-10-15T09:55:22+00:00

Listen, the fact that you were so miserable to post this on Reddit means that your cock is smaller than a donkey’s anus

QuietGround1687 · 2024-10-17T04:33:06+00:00

Only true for average or above average looking women. Women that are not as attractive don’t get much attention.

DramaticProgress508 · 2025-01-02T22:10:04+00:00

I have never in my life used it as that. Not once. (I do not go out into the world thinking I will do it with someone.) Which is probably why I got constantly reported. Because I was looking for a real genuine relationship and didn't want to hookup on the first date or "see where is goes".

Chrissyboy1980 · 2025-03-07T11:32:11+00:00

Complete and utter waste of time and money. They are all just hookup apps at the end of the day. What's the God damn point in them when people just meet up for sex coz they find each other hot looking, especially when there's little to no chance of forming a true connection or long-term relationship out of it? What's a load of old poop. Got better things in life to spend my time and money on. These apps ain't getting a penny out of me!

EugeneCezanne · 2024-10-14T18:23:54+00:00

Women on average swipe right once in 20 times

What's the source on this stat? I've encountered various other estimates and usually consider 10-15% to be the average range, based on evidence.

If a single woman is bored they just decide to get taken on a date.

I think you're underestimate how much a date can be an unpleasant experience, worse than boredom.

Laniekea · 2024-10-15T02:11:39+00:00

Sucks

apresonly · 2024-10-14T16:43:41+00:00

Men could use Grindr like this.

The fact is neither women nor men value male sexual attention.

Whoreasaurus_Rex · 2024-10-15T11:50:57+00:00

most guys don’t make that casual action cut.

No, most guys suicide swipe and swipe right on every woman.

Side note: For someone who is (supposedly) in a LTR, you seem to be preoccupied with dating/how women behave on dating apps? Odd.

Title	Most Women Use Dating Apps Like Men Wish They Could
Author	rustlerhuskyjeans
Upvotes	162
Comments	582
Date	October 14, 2024 3:37 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1g3iqwn/most_women_use_dating_apps_like_men_wish_they/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/most-women-use-dating-apps-like-men-wish-they.1533146 https://theredarchive.com/post/1533146

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