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[–]shockingupdateFDS Newbie741 points742 points743 points 5 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
“My girlfriend is perfect and could do a lot better than me, but she likes me for some reason anyway and I’m insecure about it. How do I convince her to keep sleeping with me while I find someone less intimidating to my fragile porcelain masculinity?! I’m a smol bean but still want to get my dick wet uwu “
[–]azureangel35FDS Apprentice203 points204 points205 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
This. Ugh. Such utter 🗑
[–]throwaw9876FDS Newbie98 points99 points100 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
ikr ... I nearly became that woman, literally witnessing this exact insecurity unfold in front of me.
WhAT dO yOu mEaN ... cHArAcTeR ... m-mAtTerS ?
[–]shockingupdateFDS Newbie112 points113 points114 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I rapidly became this woman while living with a deeply insecure LVM. Went to the gym daily (mostly to have an additional hour away from him but the habit stuck), found a great job that paid way more than his self-owned business (and he REALLY felt some type of way about it), starting gaining confidence, changed my look, cleaned the house, shared the rent, still cooked him three meals a day while he spent all evening gaming. The more I started noticing things were off, the more aggressively he tried to “take me down a peg,” constantly alluding that I owe my newfound success to him (which wasn’t true; he deliberately avoided writing me a recommendation letter until the deadline had already passed, but I got the job anyway). Eventually his only option was to try to embarrass me with a public breakup and kick me out of the house, convince our mutuals I was abusing him, etc.
My pickme days weren’t quite finished by then, but it definitely launched the transition. I hope this woman sees an out and takes it asap
[–]wedonthavetobeishtarFDS Newbie58 points59 points60 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, my ex-husband got significantly nastier as soon as I started “beating” him in life (I didn’t see it that way because I’m not an asshole). Of course, in the past, when he thought that he was the one who was winning, he got pretty nasty, too, and started looking around for something better. Sooooo 🤡
[–]shockingupdateFDS Newbie37 points38 points39 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Men who think love is a goddamn competition are the worst. I’m glad he’s in your rear-view mirror
(Also I love your username!)
[–]wedonthavetobeishtarFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thank you! ❤️
[–]FutureRealHousewife42 points43 points44 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm going to use "fragile porcelain masculinity' going forward. Perfect.
[–]ChocoPie998FDS Newbie24 points25 points26 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That was beautiful, I literally gagged at “smol bean”
[–]Colour_riotFDS Newbie21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
lOwEr YoUr StAnDaRdS literally being played out right here. And they say we can't make decisions on what to eat lol
[–]bringtwizzlersFDS Newbie25 points26 points27 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
LITERALLY MY INSECURE EX to a t, who cheated, ghosted me, and then married the plain girl 5 months later.
[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Well, good luck to her. She'll need it
[–]SpittensFDS Newbie824 points825 points826 points 5 years ago (41 children) | Copy Link
And on today's episode of men are trash ....
"Oh I don't like her as a person but she's hot and the sex is great so how do I keep getting it without staying in the relationship?"
Hope this woman laughs at him then leaves him when he pulls this shit on her.
[–]2340000Ruthless Strategist338 points339 points340 points 5 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link
"She treats me like a king... Is smarter than me.... and doesn't hold it over me (that I'm in fact a low life)"👀
They've been dating for 6 months. And I can't believe people have this 3 month rule🙄. He was definitely showing red flags before now.
[–]_differentmentality_FDS Newbie282 points283 points284 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Also goes to show that if a man only wants sex from you, there’s not a single thing you can improve to change that. Not a single thing.
[–]2340000Ruthless Strategist161 points162 points163 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Facts!! Waiting 3 months won't help, 6 months, or even 15 years of marriage.
Being ruthless and upholding our standards is the only way. Anything that gives us pause, we walk👌
[–]alwaysonalongtripFDS Newbie100 points101 points102 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
YOU BEING GOD DAMN BEYONCÉ would not convince him to treat you w respect.
[–]SpittensFDS Newbie110 points111 points112 points 5 years ago* (10 children) | Copy Link
It's been a while since I dated, and I always had the 3 months rule before we did anything more sexual than a hug, hand holding, or a bit of kissing. For him to see me naked and vulnerable, well most men don't even make it that far.
Last relationship I had that lasted more than a few dates it took 8 months before I let him get my pants off, and he still didn't get my undies off or his dick anywhere near wet for a while.
[–]PearlEarringGirlFDS Newbie34 points35 points36 points 5 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
You go sis like seriously that’s the smart way to do it. I have a question, I’m all for taking it slow and will follow the (at least) 3 months rule, but I have little experience with relationships, so I’d like to know how far you should go even with kissing and making out, or when is dry-jumping and that kind of physical touch ok?
[–]SpittensFDS Newbie47 points48 points49 points 5 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
That is super personal and will vary with each person or situation. For me, it depends on how comfortable they make me. If they consistently show me respect even when I refuse them I'm more likely to allow physical intimacy sooner. If they get pushy or have attitude about it then I'm done. My boundaries are non-negotiable, and any man who can't respect that doesn't deserve my time and energy. Also, my gut always tells me what's up. Even when I can't put my finger on why, I listen to that feeling that says 'maybe I shouldn't' and it has never been wrong.
I refuse to swap any bodily fluids (this includes kissing) until I have thorough STD/STI test results in hand, and ones that came directly to me from the clinic. I have had men try to forge either the date, the name, or the clinic info. I've also had men try to convince me that now that the test was done we didn't have to wait on results to do stuff. 😒 Playing fast and loose with my health and well-being is not something I'm willing to let any dude get away with.
I also will wait AT LEAST until exclusivity is agreed on before I allow them any liberties. When you stop them as they try to steal a kiss it's a pretty clear message lol. This means no making out, no feeling me up, and no stimulation clothed or unclothed. I have found most men will try to push for more in the heat of the moment, and get pissy when I don't give in to the pressure. There's my answer and I'm done.
Less sexual intimacies I'm more likely to allow earlier on. Hugs, couch snuggles, little kisses on the cheek as we pass by in the kitchen or a peck on the cheek at goodnight and goodbye. Those are harmless, sweet, and further affection without risking either of our health. Any man worth having will understand why you're so cautious because he takes similar precautions. After all, you're 60% more likely to get an STD from a male partner than the 20% it is from female partners.
I grew up in a very physical family. We were always hugging, and I would climb into bed and snuggle with my parents Sunday mornings while we watched wild America up until my teens. I CRAVE intimacy. I do not crave sex. When I start to feel horny I just think about how disappointing sex has been up to this point in my life and that does a pretty darn good job of killing it for me. I'm not a prude, I've just never had a man give me an orgasm and the definition of insanity is to repeat patterns while expecting a different outcome so 🤷🏼♀️
You're young, so internalize your relationship wants and don't ever settle for less. Decide on your boundaries early on and stick to them. Boundaries keep you safe, healthy, and sane. Any person who pushes your boundaries is not worth your time.
[–]PollyAnnaSunshineFDS Newbie21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This is honestly such Queen Shit. I have had okay boundaries around sex and most of my friends consider me extremely strict, but your post has shown me the benefits of tightening those up. And also dropping them when they start with the whining.
[–]SpittensFDS Newbie12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
OMG the whining is the worst. When that starts it kills any and all attraction I had for him lol. Definitely time to dump them and move on!
[–]PearlEarringGirlFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Wow thank you very much for sharing, specially because it is indeed a personal question, I will take some tips from you, I hadn’t considered the test results for kissing but you are on to something. I think I’m going to keep it cutesy and wholesome until exclusivity is set. I didn’t completely understand the not giving them any liberties until being exclusive, like they are not allowed to play any moves before exclusivity ? Because in that case I believe that would even make them want you more haha
And I agree, boundaries are so important !! I stuck to mine with the last guy I dated and they did not fail me, but probably should have waited a little more before making out (3rd date, nothing sexual and I was confortable with it)
[–]SpittensFDS Newbie24 points25 points26 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Depends on the moves. I mean, we all know for men the goal is sex. Very few are motivated by other concerns and even then it's still one of their top 3 motivations in any relationship.
I will give them a bit of my time (and even then I limit it) and pleasant company but that's it until we both agree to be exclusive and get tested. I usually let them bring it up first, or if they don't then I move on. Some will try to bypass this by suggesting exclusivity way too soon. Big red flag.
The fairly innocent affectionate stuff I allow before exclusivity. No serious making out, no touching of any skin not covered by clothing, and no dry-humping or pseudo sexual stuff. I keep it very innocent and wholesome. This not only protects you, but forces him to get to know and like you as a person, not a sex object. It will scare off a lot of lvm and nvm, but again, if a man pushes your boundaries he's not worthy.
Boundaries differ from person to person, so you need to figure yours out for yourself. What works for me may not work for you, and I'm pretty extreme because of the abuse and bullshit I've been through in the past. You'll know when you're uncomfortable. Just listen to your gut.
[–]PearlEarringGirlFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
“Forces him to get to know and like you as a person, bot a sex object”
THIS. It’s so annoying that we need to teach them how to treat us.
Thanks so much for expanding on this, and I hope you find a man worthy of you and your time (not that you need one)
[–]SpittensFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Never teach a man how to treat you. Demand respectful treatment from the beginning or drop his loser ass. If he's worthy he will respect your boundaries and treat you with respect. If he's unworthy he will whine, complain, coerce, threaten, and cajole until you shove your foot up his ass kicking him to the curb. Protect yourself by NEVER allowing any disrespect of any kind. When you give an inch, they will try to take a mile.
Never give any man the benefit of the doubt, and never teach him anything except where you keep the dish soap 😁
[–]Lemon_bars_addictionFDS Newbie41 points42 points43 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Umm you’re my hero 🥰 that’s all
[–]_differentmentality_FDS Newbie361 points362 points363 points 5 years ago* (11 children) | Copy Link
“My sex doll’s personality isn’t really appealing to me but I don’t want to stop having sexual access to it, does anyone know what to do?
I just want sex from her minus the part where I have to be with her, guys. Do you have any advice ? 👉👈”
[+][deleted] 5 years ago* (10 children) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]fdssavedmylifeFDS Newbie188 points189 points190 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Seeeeriously. He pretty much described a perfect woman, but he thinks he’s too good for her? Yeah, okay buddy. This post is proof that you can literally be the whole package and some loser will still manage to devalue you in his head. She deserves so much better.
[–]Lemon_bars_addictionFDS Newbie70 points71 points72 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This hits too close to home. So glad he’s blocked and deleted 🚫
[–]RiasXgremoryXFDS Disciple126 points127 points128 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I feel this is exactly what's going on, this woman probably has an awesome career, she's funnier than him, more intelligent, she's a great person so in turn everyone loves her and he can't handle it. He just said he is the exact opposite of her, now he's trying to reduce her to a "sex only" type of girl just to "humble her" and ruin her self esteem by telling her in a metaphoric way "You'll never be anyone's wifey if you don't dim your light."
This is another fragile male ego situation, he's jealous/envious of her and it shows.
[–]alwaysonalongtripFDS Newbie40 points41 points42 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wow. That’s so fucked up. When I’m insecure in a relationship I just cry to my dog and listen to Taylor Swift.
[–]Throwawayrightaway28FDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Exactly it!
[–]Inspection-CriticalFDS Apprentice73 points74 points75 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
He admits she's smarter than him and the hottest woman he's ever dated. I'm willing to bet she's superior to him in other areas as well - certainly in emotional intelligence.
She's better than him and he still thinks he can do better than her! Unbelievable!
[–]Throwawayrightaway28FDS Newbie52 points53 points54 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
No, he doesn't think he can do better than her. He acknowledges she's better than him. He wants a woman just as good, who thinks HE'S better than HER. He's fine with her being great, but he's pissed she knows her worth. He wants someone great who is insecure. Someone "beautiful who doesn't know it." The way he talks about the way his current GF always reassures him let's me know she knows he's an insecure prick. When he tries this fuckery, it's going to get him replaced.
[–]jasaminexFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Thiiiis. The whole "I want a more conservative girlfriend" just read to me as "I want a girl who isn't as confident about herself."
[–]Throwawayrightaway28FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes, you’ll notice they never want a sexually conservative girlfriend. They always want some poor confused libfem with low self-esteem who does backflips on the dick. But outside the bedroom, she can’t speak above a whisper and she keeps her eyes down. For all the trash that western men talk about more oppressive patriarchies in Asia and the Middle East, they want the same exact kind of woman. Someone confident in bed and takes charge sexually,who is a complete submissive wallflower in life. That doesn’t exist.
[–]rightioushippieFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
“Conservative taste in girlfriend...”
[–]fosho_awayFDS Newbie84 points85 points86 points 5 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link
Found essentially this in my NVM ex’s journal, which I finally read as I was getting my stuff out of the apartment (no, I would normally never do this). He was stringing me along and lying to my face for months and months, talking about me like an object. He also endlessly gaslit me when I would voice my concerns, couched very carefully as NoNvIoLeNt CoMmUnIcAtIoN. He was too chickenshit to be honest.
Always. Trust. Your. Gut.
If you feel like you’re being used, that’s because YOU ARE. If you feel like he’s not invested, even if he says he doesn’t want to break up, DONT pay attention to empty, lazy words. Follow your instincts, because the damage to your self-esteem is much more complicated to unravel than it is difficult to move on from a shit ass man wasting your time.
[–]alwaysonalongtripFDS Newbie69 points70 points71 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Idk sometimes you gotta go FBI. Having information is valuable. Through snooping I have found at least two boyfriends had wives/gfs and I was the side chick. That info helped me soooo much.
[–]fosho_awayFDS Newbie39 points40 points41 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
For real. At the very least it gives you back a sense of agency in your ability to trust yourself. This shit is emotionally abusive and damaging, and sometimes we need the information to get a slap in the face and shake loose from an unhealthy situation
[–]alwaysonalongtripFDS Newbie31 points32 points33 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yup gaslighting is harmful.
If the only way you can un-gaslight yourself is snooping, go for it. You should prob block him too, but get that scoop first.
[–]dancedancedance8341 points42 points43 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
I have unfortunately dated a dude like this :( except he wasn't an introvert, he just wanted to stay in and play video games all day and then when he came to see me not take me out and try to get some. When I confronted him about it (basically my feeling like we were FWB) he got all pissy and was like "I only wanted to spend time with you so there's no benefits." Yet after I dumped him his friends said he wanted to use me for sex because he didn't even like girls of my race. That stung.
[–]fosho_awayFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wow.... I’m so sorry.
[–]SpaceC4seFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
He turns my stomach.
[–]pikkpieFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Happy cake day!!!!
[–]KristeninmyskinFDS Apprentice10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I hope she kicks him in the nads when she leaves him in hopes that he won’t be able to breed!
[–]jargon_explosionFDS Newbie193 points194 points195 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"which is my ultimate goal, somewhere down the road." He's over thirty lol
[–]nyclaurcoFDS Newbie174 points175 points176 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
(bernie voice) i am once again asking women to not date men who are leagues below themselves. some may try to work on themselves to get on your level, but more will start disliking you for it. worst case scenario, he doesn’t dump you, but he tries to chip at your self-esteem and accomplishments to bring you down.
also, be wary of “introverts”. i’m an extrovert, so maybe i’m biased, but there is a difference between someone who needs to recharge and enjoys indoor, solo activities the most and someone who is boring and sulks every time their partner asks them to do something that isn’t video games or watching tv.
[–]PornruinedsocietyFDS Disciple45 points46 points47 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh my god you described my second husband the sulking "introvert", in the last paragraph!
[–]afancysandwichFDS Newbie35 points36 points37 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I'm an introvert and people assume I'm not because (before the panorama), I had an active life with hobbies and going out.
But I would do these things alone.
[–]nyclaurcoFDS Newbie28 points29 points30 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
yeah, people seem to confuse introversion with many other things such as agoraphobia, laziness, depression, or being boring. totally not the same things! none of those are.
[–]afancysandwichFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I've been each of those things (except agoraphobic) and it's definitely a huge difference from being an introvert seeking their own happiness.
[–]smol_kittyFDS Apprentice14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is sooooo accurate and insightful!!!
[–]mediocre_summerFDS Newbie167 points168 points169 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
He should break up with her instead of causing her pain like this. It’s selfish of him to want the parts of her personality that make him like her but then also not like her personality when it doesn’t benefit him.
[–]PornruinedsocietyFDS Disciple125 points126 points127 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
He doesn't want to lose the benefits, he just wants to streamline what they have so he only gets the best bits and benefits, with less input to him, he doesn't care about her as a human being and her thoughts and feelings.
[–]girludontbringhomeFDS Newbie25 points26 points27 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That’s the bottom line, most men are selfish with no empathy.
[–]circescircusRuthless Strategist300 points301 points302 points 5 years ago* (21 children) | Copy Link
This is disgusting.
"Over-the-top extrovert, a wild dresser, very sexual, very friendly to one and all, but a good bit too much for me". She's also a '9 out of 10', treats him like a king and is far smarter than him. If this is even true (good chance the guy is making this up completely), I feel SO sorry for her.
This is the 'reward' she gets for being a real-life manic pixie dream girl. Being involved with some misogynistic flavorless insecure blob who wants to possess her, AND downgrade her into his fuck toy. Who the fuck does he think he is? A woman like that (whether she is real or imaginary), can replace a guy like him with several better options within a day.
If she's real, she probably gave this guy a 'chance' against her better instinctive judgement and/or this relationship grew out of a 'friendship'. That or she is very insecure and/or has trauma, and thought this blob would be a safe option. I doubt he courted her, tried to impress her and proved himself to her.
This is why you can't give insecure blob men a chance. They won't be grateful, they'll just take their insecurity out on you and abuse you. If she were with a hot, confident, genuinely kind (not a 'nice guy') masculine man who properly courted her, she wouldn't be dealing with the injustice of giving a schmuck a 'chance', only to have that blow up in her face when the guy loses his grip on reality and thinks he is the one with options.
And he says switch to FWB, knowing he sucks in bed, he knows he can't keep her around just with sex/his dick. So he's looking for tips from manipulative goons, on how to mindfuck/emotionally abuse her so that she is tripped up on him, but accepts only sex from this mediocre blob schmuck.
"Not good for me"-- so then break up and let her go? Sometimes people are incompatible, not good for each other and they break up. Does he consider that he isn't good for her? Oh I forgot, she isn't a real person! What she thinks/feels/wants doesn't matter! Everything is 100% about him and his dick. The most sickening part, is that this is exactly the type of guy who thinks he is a good person, a nice guy and so on. They never examine themselves or check themselves, they are just endlessly entitled and manipulative, completely shameless, without a shred of honor or integrity.
[–]okeydaFDS Newbie82 points83 points84 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
insecure blob men
Blob men lmao.
But seriously, who do they think they are? I hope the comments aren't ridiculous agreements, but I'm sure the majority is being supportive.
[–]alwaysonalongtripFDS Newbie41 points42 points43 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
They have no idea marriage was invented by men to benefit men as a mate guarding technique.
He’ll downgrade her and she will meet someone else and lose interest and then he’ll say she’s branch swinging.
[–]Summerisle7FDS Disciple18 points19 points20 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I will be using "blob men" as a descriptor daily from here on out
[–]Only_Lime2520FDS Newbie71 points72 points73 points 5 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
I saved your comment. I think it's what happened to me for real, but part of me still doesn't believe it.
I am often told I'm way out of my ex's league, often told (yes external validation is still important on me--I'm working on it) I'm beautiful, smart, charismatic, well-versed in multiple topics. I raised a company from the ground up, went on TV shows, etc. Yet I was with a guy who would spend his hours watching Netflix until they "run out of shows for him to watch"--his words, not mine.
Yes, I had a lot of traumas growing up. Sexual, physical, psychological. I had to sell stuffs on the streets when I was 6.
Yes, he never had to court me or tried to impress me. He negged me into believing that was a vain traditional practice.
Yes, I think I made him more delusional as time went by as he started to suggest poly relationship to me.
Yes, ultimately, I started to also to lose grip on the reality because the injustice just completely blew my mind.
🤮🤮🤮
[–]alwaysonalongtripFDS Newbie16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Do you have an anxious attachment style? I do and can def relate.
[–]MadholleyFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I’m so sorry but so glad you leveled up and don’t worry- he will never get the likes of you again!!!
[–]throwaw9876FDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
This is so triggering 🤣 fml
[–]Only_Lime2520FDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I'm sorry but I don't get why it's funny :(
[–]throwaw9876FDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Because dudes like this are laughable clowns :)
[–]dembar126FDS Newbie67 points68 points69 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I can't wait for him to dump her and slowly realize he fucked up beyond belief and can't find someone "better". Men like this deserve to die alone.
[–]alwaysonalongtripFDS Newbie40 points41 points42 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
For the rest of his life he will regret it.
Never gonna get a young vibrant woman to love him like this again.
[–]bringtwizzlersFDS Newbie19 points20 points21 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Good lol
[–]bringtwizzlersFDS Newbie32 points33 points34 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
On the contrary, I bet you he DID court her and lovebomb the fuck out of her. That is usually the only way these gross, insecure losers get incredibly cool and attractive girls. They don't want to have her, their fragile as fuck egos just want to see if they CAN get her.
[–]WatzooFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Probably. And she may have thought that if she dates one of the plain guys who isn’t a player and who knows he lucked out with her every time he passes a mirror, that he will be faithful and better toward her than the hot guys have been.
I had to learn this the hard way. Never “date down” with looks. It’s the same garbage except he now thinks he can go get hot girls and will want to try this newfound ability as widely as possible.
[–]Throwawayrightaway28FDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Falls down wiggling, electrified by this truth
[–]Inspection-CriticalFDS Apprentice46 points47 points48 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This guy openly says she's too good for him but still thinks he can do better. When he realizes he can't, he'll spend the next 10 years whining about how she was "the one that got away."
[–]throwaw9876FDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You didn'y have to call me out like that 💀
[–]MadholleyFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This response is everything!! So fucking true.
[–]_differentmentality_FDS Newbie353 points354 points355 points 5 years ago* (22 children) | Copy Link
Women need to understand this:
A man being in a relationship with you does not guarantee that he actually likes you, cares about you, let alone loves you.
Always have this in the back of your mind. A lot of men get in relationships for sexual access first and foremost and consider the actual relationship the work they have to put up with in order to get what they actually want. They see the relationship as the means to get to the real end (sex). A lot of women would be surprised to learn that their “boyfriends” would jump at the opportunity to not have to deal with them and still get sexual access to them. It’s a difficult pill to swallow, but women need to be aware of this before entering relationships with men so they can look out for it.
[–]HardwatergalFDS Newbie117 points118 points119 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Been there
Got dumped and after pressing “why?” He did eventually say he never really liked me in a romantic way. That is why you never chase. They will just go along with it for sex. Something women never do.
[–]_differentmentality_FDS Newbie89 points90 points91 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Girl straight facts, men are opportunistic daters, they will not turn down an opportunity to have sex with a woman they know they have a chance with. Never chase, eggs should not be going after sperm when they’re more valuable, it’s embarrassing on a biological level.
[–]threedotloveFDS Apprentice83 points84 points85 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
This was my last narc ex. He didn't love me, but I was 'the hottest girl he had ever dated' so he kept me around for the sex until I demanded more from the relationship & he decided it was too much effort.
[–]bringtwizzlersFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Same here, except he stopped having sex with me after 3 months, I'm sure because he thought he "conquered" me and got bored. He kept me around for a year because he has no friends and is lonely, and I am a reformed people pleaser.
[–]HardwatergalFDS Newbie34 points35 points36 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
I’ve also had similar “compliments” about being so good at sex acts, but you must remember that men will literally fuck decaying fruit, chickens, owls, whatever. It’s not high praise...
[–]GodILoveTheEnglishFDS Newbie18 points19 points20 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Decaying fruit, chickens, and owls, holy shit I’m laughing out loud because of how true this is
[–]HardwatergalFDS Newbie18 points19 points20 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
There was a post recently with a furry who wanted to fuck owls lol not even joking ...
[–]missangel89FDS Newbie159 points160 points161 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Not only sex. A lot of men also just want to be a relationship to have a warm body to assist them in life (loneliness, therapy, housework, etc.)
These are men who are like, "Why can't I get a girlfriend????"
[–]FabledAngryVillagerFDS Apprentice76 points77 points78 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"Why do I invest so much and end up alone?" - my last narc ex who emotionally abused every woman he's been with
[–]PornruinedsocietyFDS Disciple87 points88 points89 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes, my second husband wasn't bothered about sex, he preferred porn. I was the hot girl from school, I think I was just a trophy for him and a convenience in other ways, mummy maid, therapy, place to stay etc etc.
[–]dembar126FDS Newbie63 points64 points65 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
THIS. I broke up with a guy 3 years ago and sadly got suckered into staying "friends" at his request. Which basically just meant that we still talked and occasionally had sex but he didn't have to commit to me anymore.
I was an idiot and thought that eventually he'd realize how good he had it with me and work to change & win me back. LMAO. But I was surprised when he really didn't seem as upset about the breakup as me, and I was the only one who kept bringing up fixing our problems and getting back together.
He was getting an even better deal than before and he knew it, so of course he didn't want me back. It took me until finding this sub to realize what had actually happened.
[–]Inspection-CriticalFDS Apprentice54 points55 points56 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Men will marry this way, too. It's unreal.
[–]RadenoughyetFDS Newbie26 points27 points28 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
And yet, most men think them being in a relationship with you is all they should have to do to keep you.
[–]complex_answer_22FDS Apprentice29 points30 points31 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yup, if they're not sacrificing something whether it's their time, money, manual labor, etc, they don't care. Men only invest if it's something they care about.
[–]shockingupdateFDS Newbie95 points96 points97 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Two exes tried to pull that shit on me. “Hey, I know you hate me and everything and I know I never actually gave you an orgasm but I haven’t had sex at all since you left so like...wanna hook up and maybe make this a regular thing until I find a replacement for you?”
The audacity.
[–]nyclaurcoFDS Newbie43 points44 points45 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
the one way you can look out for it is by seeing if they want to spend quality time with you or invest money into the relationship with meaningful gifts and experiences, but if you say that, the majority of men and women will call you an entitled, broke gold digger (gifts) or clingy and insecure (quality time). so how am i supposed to tell if a man gives a crap about me? if he puts his penis in or around me? as if he wouldn’t to many, many other women? lol
[–]throwaw9876FDS Newbie31 points32 points33 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
OUF the facts.
You also forgot: peer pressure. Tremendous peer pressure.
And, in the case of abusers & porn addicts: they want to tell themselves they are "normal". They're decent guys after all. Able to hold down a relationship.
[–]dancedancedance8315 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
*sighs* I wish 19-27 year old me really understood this concept. Like seriously. I'm going to save your comment, though! Currently not dating or looking at all, but it is definitely true.
[–]pikkpieFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Happy cake day queen!
[–]uptownxthotFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
as someone who’s never had a real relationship this makes me feel even shittier about how men see me.
[–]Inspection-CriticalFDS Apprentice4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's not your fault and not a reflection of your worth. It means men are deficient.
[–]ErineldaFDS Apprentice105 points106 points107 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Wasn't there a post the other day full of guys talking out their asses about women getting used because they are lacking something? Now in this post they get used if they have too much "something" as well?
Women. It's always their fault, am I right fellas?
[–]SoftritoFDS Apprentice28 points29 points30 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Got to be great but not great enough/s
[–]azureangel35FDS Apprentice29 points30 points31 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Motherfuckers think they're Goldilocks wanting just the right amount of awesome miss me with that shit Kyle.
[–]FabledAngryVillagerFDS Apprentice79 points80 points81 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm not talking just about her love feelings
We know you don't give a shit about her
[–]giftofnocondemnationFDS Apprentice77 points78 points79 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
He is threatened by her sexiness, he knows she is too good for him and will eventually dump him. So he wants to dump her as a girlfriend first, to spare his precious ego. But he still wants to use her for sex, of course!
[–]FitncurlyFDS Disciple22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This, such cold-hearted insecurity (and audacity!)
[–]MySonderStoryFDS Newbie75 points76 points77 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The keywords this poster uses annoy me. “Can you change a girlfriend into a FWB” - girls are not cars you swap parts for.
“Hottest best looking woman I’ve ever been with by a factor of 27. She’s probably perfect for 9 out of 10 guys” - he should stop being selfish and breakup so great guys treat her with respect. The fact that he knows 90% of guys will treat her better yet he’s holding her back selfishly.
[–]AyxmiiiFDS Newbie72 points73 points74 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Been there. Done that. Men like this love your looks and sex appeal but don’t love you.
I was dumped after he told me I was too much for him to bring home to his strict parents and I wasn’t as “smart” as him. But my sex was enough to keep him happy right? Total waste of my time.
Never give a man below you a chance. 9/10 this ALWAYS happens. I knew I was out of his league and I still cared for him because of his personality. “Nice guys” are trash also. He was a total narcissistic piece of 🗑🤦🏾♀️
[–]Independent_Leather3FDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I’m sorry this happened to you. People are awful.
[–]AyxmiiiFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Aw thank you ! Trust me - I am grateful for the experience rather. I now know the red flags I need to avoid and I know that every time someone like that hurts you - it’s never any fault of your own ! Took me a long time to process that.
But thank you x
[–]The_PyramidionFDS Newbie63 points64 points65 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Some "friend" he is. Hope the gf dumps his ass, a bag of ratshit is better company than this.
[–]wibble69FDS Newbie68 points69 points70 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Men literally describe the most perfect, wonderful, happy, lovely woman and be like "right, how can I tear her down". He feels inferior to her (he is, but anyway) so he has to treat her like an object to bring her down and put her in her place. Pretty sure he hopes to ruin her confidence by letting her know she's good enough to fuck but not take seriously as a person. I hate him so so much.
[–]verusckaFDS Disciple65 points66 points67 points 5 years ago* (5 children) | Copy Link
LOL. Imagine you were seeing a guy you had love feelings for and he said he was “uncomfortable in the long term” with you, but wanted to continue having sex. He’s posting this on Reddit instead of just telling her how he feels because he knows she would dump him instantly.
[–]Inspection-CriticalFDS Apprentice56 points57 points58 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What's more, he admits she's amazing and better than him and he still doesn't want her.
Just further proof you can't make a man like you no matter how great you are, so don't waste your time.
[–]WatzooFDS Newbie17 points18 points19 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
And eventually someone on the internet will suggest “poly” and he will go “Genius!” And try that instead of suggesting FWB. I still think that, from a guys perspective, poly is basically a FWB, but with a wingwoman added on.
[–]SpicyScroteRoasteryFDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Been there, never again.
[–]verusckaFDS Disciple2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I love your username
[–]SpicyScroteRoasteryFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
<3
[–]YellowsunflowerloverFDS Newbie54 points55 points56 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
His insecurities stink, poor girl. She's literally amazing and he's going to dump her and make her think she was the issue -_- he needs to go back to the dumpster he crawled out of.
[–]dembar126FDS Newbie54 points55 points56 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"How can I not commit to this woman while still using her for sex and giving her literally nothing in return?"
[–]fogplumFDS Newbie105 points106 points107 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Oh my god. Why did her date her in the first place?
The very least he could do is break up with her like a man and leave her alone.
Ladies, don't date below your league, you'll only feel that much more stupid when he disrespects you.
[–]throwaw9876FDS Newbie37 points38 points39 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Am there right now as I type (ofc he will never admit it), makes 0 difference what league, dimension or solar system we're in.
You start to take for granted -> you get dumped.
[–]flowers4uFDS Newbie51 points52 points53 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Men are so bizarre. They say women are hard to figure out, but this is nuts to me.
[–]OrangeyPandaFDS Apprentice51 points52 points53 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
This sounds like a male to male bragging post. "I have a super hot perfect woman as a girlfriend but I'd rather just use her for sex, any advice boyz?" Who wants to bet he's single and creating a internet fantasy.
[–]EarthKveikFDS Apprentice4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Who wants to bet he's single and creating a internet fantasy.
I'd put money on this.
[–]sunflowerpaintFDS Newbie26 points27 points28 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Translation: "I don't want any commitment with her but I want her available for sex because I'd rather string her along then lose out on having sex"
Yeah ok Buddy. Why is sex such an obsession for these guys? It won't even be enjoyable if you don't like the person.
[–]EmoDreamFDS Newbie15 points16 points17 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I love sex and I have great sex with my boyfriend multiple orgasms every time but I still can’t believe the things men will do to get laid when you can just masturbate and get the same results. get a good realistic sex toy I have a ton of them it feels pretty similar... The way they obsess over sex like it’s the only thing in life is unhealthy and really odd actually but like I said I love sex but it can’t be the only thing in life that you care about. I can’t believe the way they see women like just a hole, it’s disgusting. 🤢
[–]okeydaFDS Newbie45 points46 points47 points 5 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
What even is a friendship with sex added good for? I can maybe see how a sex only relationship could work (although they most likely won't), if no hanging out or texting was involved. The only problem is that I can't think of anyone who'd want that. Even scrotes want more out of the girl they want to fuck.
[–]giftofnocondemnationFDS Apprentice77 points78 points79 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
It’s only good for the man. A woman hanging out and giving sex to a friend is blocking potential suitors from pursuing her.
[–]FitncurlyFDS Disciple44 points45 points46 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Big time hot take. Our time is the most precious resource we have ladies—don’t let asshole men trick you into wasting yours on them. Keep it moving until a HVM worth your while makes you wanna stop 💅🏼
[–]pineycitrusforestFDS Apprentice14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
And likely not getting off... lol
[–]throwaw9876FDS Newbie12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thissssssss.
[–]bringtwizzlersFDS Newbie28 points29 points30 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Because men are secretly in love with... wait for it, other men. Their buddies provide them everything they need! They don't need a girl around to be friends with, just to stick their dicks in.
[–]McccyFDS Apprentice87 points88 points89 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
At times like this I wish a nerd would dox this guy and text his gf this post.
[–]azureangel35FDS Apprentice32 points33 points34 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I wish we could find a lot of women from relationship posts. especially the one from yesterday with twins.
[–]fds_account57FDS Newbie40 points41 points42 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I like how he says friends is most important but benefits are also necessary. Like he enjoys her emotional labor and the rewards of her personality, but don’t get it twisted—she’s still not a person to him. Without sex he wants nothing to do with her.
Women have to stop letting these little boys suffer under the delusion that men are choosers.
[–]aquietswordFDS Newbie51 points52 points53 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh look, our daily reminder not to fuck with small, insecure men.
[–]Independent_Leather3FDS Newbie30 points31 points32 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is one of the shittiest things I’ve ever read. Men have no shame.
[–]CoconutJasmineBombeFDS Newbie32 points33 points34 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Ugh, just wait for this guy in 10years or so in Deadbeadrooms after he finds his perfect conservative long term lady. What a contradictory dumbass.
[–]Throwawayrightaway28FDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
One time I posted in there that men cause their own deadbedroooms because they idealize and chase women who don't want to sleep with them during courtship, then are surprised Pikachu face when the woman doesn't want sex after marriage either. Why not date and marry women who like and are into sex, instead of demonizing them? The men tried to come for me, but one guy admitted he married a conservative virgin for clout and got the DB he deserved.
[–]Sea_SoilFDS Apprentice20 points21 points22 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Its the madonna-wh*** complex in which men only see women as one or the other. They will sleep with and lust after sexual women but never respect them as "wife material". To them, women are only one or the other. Its a false dichotomy.
[–]afternidnightinc14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This post is giving me life. The guy I’ve been seeing on and off for nearly three years is far more introverted than me, and this struck a chord. There’s excellent advice in these comments, I really needed to see this all today. Thank you ladies. I’ve been on Reddit for a few years and this sub is the best thing I’ve come across by a long shot.
[–]Throwawayrightaway28FDS Newbie12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"Three years" and "off and on" is giving me allllll the red flags. Leave him, sis.
[–]InaneObservationsFDS Newbie46 points47 points48 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
He doesn't want to downgrade her because she's overly great. He wants to downgrade her so he can make less effort while still keeping her around.
He wants the same girlfriend while renegotiating down to not bring expected to do boyfriend things in return, like dress up for dates or remember her birthday.
This is why we don't date ugly, introvert dudes who won't make an effort. Because then we end up with ugly, introvert dudes who won't make an effort, and this is what they sound like.
[–]harry-package12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
“How can I change our relationship so only my needs are important?”
[–]abby_ch238FDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Do you know how awful things have got to be for me to think “wow at least he’s aware enough to ask and consider officially making the switch, most guys when they realize they don’t want the gf longterm still drag the girl along as a ‘gf’ but only think of the girl as a fuck buddy while cheating/looking for the ‘right’ girl.”
WHY.ARE.MEN.
[–]gutsandgoreyFDS Newbie12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'll date her, she sounds like my dream woman! She's fun, social, and smart.
But of course he wants to keep fucking her.
[–]alwaysonalongtripFDS Newbie25 points26 points27 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Why would I ever speak to a man knowing this is how they think? 🙄
[–]rebel4acauseFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This can't be real, but if it is it's the Madonna-whore complex in full display.
[–]sassyheatherFDS Newbie22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I’m cringing so hard since my ex was literally that. Broke up with me and had the audacity to immediately say “I’d love to stay friends with benefits though”
[–]RowbloksFDS Newbie22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
This sounds fake. Like it's the fantasy of an incel who wants to pretend that he knows what it feels like to reject an amazing woman
[–]bitch_not_itFDS Newbie22 points23 points24 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"She's a ... wild dresser, very sexual.. is far smarter than I am but doesn't lord it over me... I'd sure love to have her as an FWB, benefits would be necessary too"
What a true LVM, a snivelly, insecure, selfish child. I feel so, so, so sorry for her. I hope she got away
[–]smol_kittyFDS Apprentice11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So my ex got Reddit 🤔
[–]PollyAnnaSunshineFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
OMG. They ruin everything by not being grateful for what they have. He might as well write that he has 20k in cash and he doesn't really like the feel of it and wonders if lighting it on fire or wiping his ass with it would be more fun and exciting.
[–]hanjaporfavorFDS Newbie21 points22 points23 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
"...I'd also have to somehow deal with." Wtf 🤣 so her literally caring about you is a burden? You'll have to "deal" with her feelings if you downgrade her into a FWB?? Mental illness, I swear all of them are mentally ill and homoerotic there is absolutely no way in hell these specimens like women.
Edit: and when I mean mentally ill, I mean sociopathic, cluster be personality disorder because that....that you seriously can not get any help for.
[–]dollymyfollyFDS Newbie19 points20 points21 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Do boys know that they can’t cherry pick traits? All those good things she offers only comes with the “bad.” If he doesn’t want those, he can’t have the stuff he enjoys either. It doesn’t fucking work like that.
[–]Dormouse_in_a_teapotFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What a clown.
[–][deleted] 11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
She treats him like a king and is perfect in every way. I think his real goal here is to hurt her before she inevitably realizes she can do better than him
[–]esseteaFDS Newbie19 points20 points21 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
How do they not feel ashamed for how sociopathic this thinking is? He literally has no empathy for her at all
[–]dancedancedance8310 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Gosh, this hurts my heart. I used to fall for dudes who were like this (I even dated one) in my early 20s, and it's just awful.
And for some of them, I was proud some of these FWB guys kept me around because the sex was "good" or because they were hot or whatever. But at what cost? One guy made it pretty clear I was the sexiest woman he ever been with and found me irresistible, and I took that in such a high compliment. Never mind he didn't want to date me. But made a quick exit stage left to jump into a relationship with another girl (who actually was a pretty cool person, we follow each other on Instagram all these years later) after I had expressed feelings for him. Jokes on that guy though, I ended up accepting it and when we worked together at a bookstore, I put him in his place when he wanted to say snide comments to me and disrespect me (go 21 y/o me!) and he apologized like his ass should have. The girlfriend finally dumped him 2 or so years later.
The second guy, same thing, we were fucking and I wanted more. He didn't. The last time we banged, he made me drive 40 minutes to his house (he lived with his parents, gross) and banged and then ghosted me after saying he "can't" be in a relationship. He then jumped into a relationship with some woman 20 years his senior and it was a hostile relationship from all that he was posting online. Somehow he found me after that relationship ended and was saying he wanted to go to lunch with me and see me again since we both worked downtown. 22 y/o me was like "I'm gonna ghost you back." and I did. #boybye
I just cannot believe there was a time in my life where I was begging losers who only saw me as a slam piece and nothing more. I really though they were boyfriend material. Lol, they were not.
PS- NONE of them gave me an orgasm. Sex must've not been that good.
[–]Noogenesis21FDS Newbie2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Happy cake day! 🙂🎂
[–]Bubbly-ManufacturerFDS Newbie17 points18 points19 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The “benefits” have to be necessary?
[–]RisoaFDS Apprentice16 points17 points18 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It sounds like he's so damn insecure that his gf is better than him in so many ways that his ego needs to push her down to the FWB category to feel better about himself.
[–]Bubbly-Risk-3758FDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Today's episode of "Men Hate Vibrant And Intelligent Women"
[–]SearchLightsIncFDS Newbie14 points15 points16 points 5 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I did some digging and managed to find this guys profile pic:
https://images.app.goo.gl/bMpHTcc7SavTokKq5
[–]Noogenesis21FDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
🤣👏
[–]TheFinalGirl_21FDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This sounds like the last couple of guys who dumped me. If she’s as amazing as he describes, she’ll be a forever single, too. Men only fantasize about women like that. They don’t actually want it. It makes me sick.
[–]uptownxthotFDS Newbie6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
i really hope this woman finds fds and never speaks to this lowlife again.
[–]throwaway32132134FDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
The entitlement of men is truly remarkable. I don't think I have ever in my entire life seen an more entitled group of people.
[–]shitpostingbareback12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is why it is important to vet for HVM and not ever settle. They will never appreciate you because they know they are low value and judge you negatively for giving them a chance. The saying "pearls before swine" comes to mind.
[–]wHAtisLife597 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wow what an a hole.
[–]thatIBchick11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I hate how he's trying sooo hard to prove he's not like the other 9/10 guys because he's 'quieter and more conservative' and proceeds to seek a FWB situationship. This just proved that all men circle back to the same sexual needs in the name of a 'relationship'. Notice how he realises she's way too good for him but he doesn't want to fully let her go and wants to manipulate her emotionally to forcefully say yes to being FWB. Limp dick energy.
[–]girludontbringhomeFDS Newbie12 points13 points14 points 5 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
My ex did this to me 😭 he undid the commitment when we were reaching close to 6 months in our relationship, but kept talking to me 24/7 all the same. He didn’t try to do anything sexual after the break-up at least. Men are trash.
[–]Previous-Focus-2013FDS Newbie[S] 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
That’s just cruel. Why? To check in? For attention? So selfish
[–]girludontbringhomeFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Checking in would just be a quick conversation maybe once a month.
He wouldn’t go hardly a waking hour without texting me, no, I would never initiate.
It never made sense to me. When we were together, it felt like we were perfect for each other. Never once did I doubt him or our relationship. I waited a long time to be physical with him (even kissing, holding hands) we really built a strong emotional connection as friends, then when we went out on dates, and while we were in a relationship. He told me he loved me first and he seemed like he really did. It was the biggest shock of my life when he dumped me, my friends were shocked too (in contrast to other relationships I’ve had where you could clearly see the end). It’s hard to explain but even after we broke up I felt so close to him that he felt like family, or like a part of me honestly. I used to end the convo when he would reach out post break-up saying I didn’t want to hear from him and inevitably he’d reach out months or even close to a year later. We would talk, and it never felt like any time had passed, we would hit it off again right away.
I think what he’s doing is just classic narcissistic behavior, based on the research I’ve done. It puzzles me, and disappoints me, that someone who I valued so much could be so selfish and full of himself. He seemed like a good person, but the way he has hurt me repeatedly like this shows that he’s not. Always beware of the wolf in sheep’s clothing.
[–]Previous-Focus-2013FDS Newbie[S] 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Oh seems like he wanted to keep you for emotional needs and stuff regardless of how you felt... 100% narc.
[–]idktryagain12310 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Aka he doesn’t want to improve himself nor his aspirations as he knows down the road she would see his faults and leave him behind like the sore loser he apparently is. I sure hope she doesn’t imbibe in the fwb. Sis has it going on.
[–]rabbitatnightFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Holy shit I feel like this is my piece of shit boyfriend talking about me. Where was this post
[–]moon-drag0nFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I can smell the bullshit through the screen; this woman doesn't exist. He only typed up his dream girl and then dismisses her to make himself look good.
[–]StuffenfluffFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
AKA: I'm insecure and can't handle the fact that my girlfriend is better than me in every way. how do I keep getting my cock sucked tho
[–]oscine23FDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Then he'll find the woman who's more 'compatible', decide she's boring, and cheat on her with someone like his girlfriend. FFS
[–]RenrenchiFDS Newbie7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"Women don't give nice guys* a chance."
Lmao look what happens when they do.
*neckbeards
[–]tuuast3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
ew. like it’s okay if she’s not for you but... wtf just break up and let her be loser
[–]miss_peach94FDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I hope she finds fds
[–]HumanAdhesiveness360FDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Who made this man child think he can be...this?? Wtf
[–]DeterminedblondeFDS Newbie3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I want to know where this post was and to read the advice so we all know what to watch out for.
[–]mintmint336 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This sounds totally like an ex bf. After 3 years he broke up with me because he had started a relationship with a virgin conservative girl -his words- but he still wanted me sexually.
[–]fairywakesFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I love when men talk about us as a commodity, or like some sort of car upgrade. What the actual fuck, shame on him for using her and wasting her time like this. May the woman he want in life ignore him forever.
[–]VmwviFDS Apprentice5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Madonna-wh*re complex right there. He used her for sex once, now he only want to use her for sex and have a "pure" virgin wife while he sleeps around.
[–]kinda-embarrasingFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Dear OP, Can we get a source please? I’m 98% convinced this is bf I broke up with recently...
[–]randowordgeneratorFDS Newbie13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
this is a troll
[–]wedonthavetobeishtarFDS Newbie10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What’s weird is that it does sound like he genuinely loves her and is in denial. 🤔 He just would rather have the image in his head than anything real.
[–]yourstorywillgoonThrowaway Account5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Lol when my ex broke up with me he asked if we could still be FWB 🙄
[–]daisy_0720FDS Disciple5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Once you realize that men are incapable of happiness, it explains soooo much.
[–]purziveplaxyFDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
New rule, when we see assholes like this everyone give them. The worst advice possible that will reveal their narcissism.
[–]meilteoirx52 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Just graceful :-)
FYI guys last response was:
Okay, I see what you guys are saying, and I see the error of my ways. I guess I was just dreaming out loud and living in some warped fantasy world for a second. I have tried to break up with her in the past, but she's always reeled me back in. She is part narcissist and can use those traits like a tractor beam on me. I've got to toughen up.
[–]eviewevieFDS Newbie0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Set this poor girl free
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.created by /u/dream-hunter
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