Would most men cheat on their partners if given the chance?

AlmostKindaGreat · 2023-07-25T03:48:30+00:00

Seems like you'll just get answers here according to people's prejudices about men. Those who think men are mostly lying scumbags will say most will cheat. Others will say not.

I just did a quick search and found this study.

https://today.yougov.com/topics/society/articles-reports/2015/06/02/men-more-likely-think-cheating

41% of men say that they have about cheating on their partners, while 39% said that they hadn't ever thought about it. Most women (54%) say that they've never thought about cheating on their partner, while 28% admit that they have. When it comes to actually doing the deed, however, a fifth both men and women (21% and 19%, respectively) say that they have cheated on a partner.

tl;dr - Men think about cheating more than women. Men and women cheat about the same amount (~20%).

DubiousTarantino · 2023-07-25T01:30:21+00:00

I had the option to when I went on vacation, but I didn’t out of respect for my partner

Observer_7578 · 2023-07-25T01:34:24+00:00

No. I sincerely would not cheat.

blebbyroo · 2023-07-25T00:32:39+00:00

I’m sure a lot would but know not all would.

Some guys value stability and their partner more than a hookup especially if they don’t need the validation

Love my guy and trust him completely

He’s hit on all the time at a couple of his side jobs and when he tells me about it I just laugh and feel him up and say something like I don’t blame her

AstronautLoveShack · 2023-07-25T01:03:09+00:00

Maybe I'm overly optimistic about men but I don't think most would. A lot would, certainly, but not most.

mycatlikesluffas · 2023-07-25T02:40:30+00:00

"men are only as faithful as their options”

-Chris Rock

totallyworkinghere · 2023-07-25T00:46:08+00:00

Most men in general? No.

Most men on this sub? Yes.

Motherofvampires · 2023-07-25T06:52:13+00:00

There is a saying "A man is as faithful as his opportunities." And when you look at men who have endless opportunity with women, such as celebrities, sports stars, even politicians, the majority of them do cheat.

Zabadoodude · 2023-07-25T01:54:09+00:00

I don't think most would cheat. Many would for sure, but there are a lot of men with integrity too.

Hellknightx31 · 2023-07-25T00:56:16+00:00

It's hilarious that you put "average" man when the average man doesn't even get approached. Swap that word with the "top 20%" of men; the answer would be yes. Well in most cases. Or maybe swap genders? Eh, you can find that answer on r/Infidelity, r/survivinginfidelity, and r/cheating_stories.

badfirstdate- · 2023-07-25T00:52:23+00:00

If she’s super hot and they knew they could get away with it forever, probably 85% of men.

ConestogaCreek · 2023-07-25T01:33:42+00:00

Honestly I don’t think so. Not these days when it is hard to find a woman and so much can go wrong w the other one.

kt1a · 2023-07-25T01:31:34+00:00

If the average man was approached by a woman, would he always take her up on that offer if there were no repercussions?

What does it mean by no repercussions? If it means that the wife is completely fine with it. I imagine many men would take up the offer - assuming that the woman is attractive to him.

If it instead means that the wife won't find out because it's a ONS and it's really on the husband to not say anything... No, I don't think most men would do it. Most men aren't cheaters even if given the opportunity. It's as much about your own faith as it is about your spouses. Believing that you're capable of not cheating is as important as not being cheated on.

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Most_Read_1330 · 2023-07-25T04:56:04+00:00

I say no. Most men realize how hard it is to get a relationship so they wouldn't want to risk losing it.

thernis · 2023-07-25T06:09:02+00:00

The guilt would tear me apart. I could never.

shico12 · 2023-07-25T06:56:35+00:00

Guilt is a repercussion. just saying.

WanabeInflatable · 2023-07-25T09:24:14+00:00

I had lots of opportunities but never cheated. I think, I'm not unique and many men actually have principles. Difficult to estimate percentage, though

Gergar12 · 2023-07-25T15:53:07+00:00

I would rather have a fulfilling relationship for a lifetime then a one night stand with a stranger.

Workaholiconew · 2023-07-25T17:49:32+00:00

I hate how women ask...

"Would most men cheat on their partners if given the chance?"

If there is someone who would know how to answer that... thats clearly women. Not men. We only know ourselves. And we don't go out of our way to cheat on exclusive partners unless:

We are sexually starved at that moment
We were thinking of cheating already
She was so extremely hot and we so horny we would lose control of ourselves

What percentage of men would always go for it as long as they knew they would get away with it?

Eh... 1-3%?

MostConfident9999 · 2023-07-26T01:43:11+00:00

Yes. 99.999% will never have the opportunity to cheat. Men who can cheat are Alphas.

Neptune-Jr · 2023-07-25T03:18:44+00:00

Assuming this is a normal functioning relationship were both partners actually like each other. I'd say only about 30% would cheat.

WARPANDA3 · 2023-07-25T06:52:42+00:00

I wouldn't. It's not worth the hurt and Damage it would cause my wife

quantumpencil · 2023-07-25T00:32:40+00:00

No they wouldn't. Most men do have the chance.

Men experience love and sex is not the only need they have -- many men reject other women all the time because hurting someone they care and throwing away trust and comfort and love for 30 minutes of pleasure is a horrible trade.

LarsBohenan · 2023-07-25T01:09:27+00:00

Presented with the woman of their dreams and given the chance: I would say easily 85% would. A lot of men arent as randy as you think and are more female in their nature - emotions, connection, the moral dilemma of cheating, etc. Then there are men who are with actual knock-out girls. Theres guys who are in the romantic phase of a relationship who might say no. But I cant think of one guy I know in a longterm relationship who would turn down 1 hour with the woman of their dreams over their current gf.

ApprehensiveDot3115 · 2023-07-25T01:52:02+00:00

I think most average men would, if they somehow knew they'd 100% get away with it.

Average men are invisible to the vast majority of women. If he was reasonably attracted to her, and she was making it easy for him, he'd probably go for it.

I've been cheated on once before, and it was absolutely gut-wrenching. The worst heartbreak of my life. I often think about how it wouldn't feel nearly as bad to cheat on someone as it does to be cheated on yourself.

It makes me think things like "Well, if cheating is an inevitability, you may as well strike first, before they can do it to you. To save yourself the emotional damage."

I don't know if I'd ever act on that, but it's something I think about a lot. I see so many people treating relationships so flippantly. Willing to shatter something long-term and stable, but a bit boring and stale at the moment, for a transient emotional thrill.

That, combined with the fact human beings are not monogamous by nature, and that our desires and needs change over time (we grow apart), makes me wonder if the expectation of monogamy is only setting yourself up for failure.

Even if you find someone you're aligned with, you can't be sure you'll still be aligned 10 years from now.

Most of the women I'm seeing are more responsive to the exciting, thrilling little relationship dramas. The highs and lows of the honeymoon period. It would be nice to meet some who are are similarly enthralled by the 'boring', settled, peaceful homebody life.

Laurely4u · 2023-07-25T02:16:06+00:00

I have known a handful of men who wouldn’t cheat, but most probably would 85%

El_Don_94 · 2023-07-25T00:42:12+00:00

Why did you ask this question?

It implicitly assumes negative characteristics of an entire gender when we're all human and the majority of people want the best for each other.

WYenginerdWY · 2023-07-25T01:20:38+00:00

If the average man was approached by a woman, would he always take her up on that offer if there were no repercussions?

If so, would he take her up on that offer even if he was in a relationship?

Hell yes. That's the central tension of most of the men here, they aren't "Chad" with enough options to fuck a new pussy every weekend and it makes them sadbois. Listen to the way they talk about men they view as "top tier", they think it's completely reasonable that if such a man deigns to settle down with a woman, that woman should expect to share him behind the scenes.

If so called "average dudes" could get away with the same behavior themselves, they'd do so in a heartbeat.

itiswhatitis1090 · 2023-07-25T02:01:15+00:00

A dog never says no to a bone, even if it's a well fed dog.

angelicasinensis · 2023-07-25T03:01:15+00:00

I 100% believe my husband wouldn’t.

thebesttoaster · 2023-07-25T02:55:28+00:00

I'm a firm believer that men just aren't capable of monogamy. It's stronger than them: they aren't wired for it.

The only men who don't cheat are the ones without opportunity to do so. I don't believe there is a man who would turn down sex with a hot a woman if he thought there would be no consequences (for example, his partner wouldn't find out). The thing is: it's unlikely that a man in a relationship would be offered easy sex from an attractive woman.

If someone is willing to date men, they have to accept this fact. That's why gay men have such humongous rates of open relationships.

And that's also why I'm very glad I'm a lesbian: it must suck a lot to be attracted to men as a woman.

Antisocialite99 · 2023-07-25T02:11:34+00:00

There have been studies on this. A lot.

Most.men are loyal through and through. A small.number of men are serial cheaters.

Most women will cheat if their relationship isn't going well and they feel it's justified but arent serial cheaters.

akivafr123 · 2023-07-25T01:49:34+00:00

Fuck no

PublicConfection3056 · 2023-07-25T08:13:21+00:00

Take it from me, I have a thing for men in relationships (working on it) and 9 times out of 10 if I peruse they will reciprocate. Which is why I will never ever take my relationships with men seriously

excess_inquisitivity · 2023-07-25T06:32:41+00:00

To me, "if there were no repercussions" includes the condition that my current partner would be unoffended, undisrespected, and with full knowledge would feel just as loving and loved either way.

I mean, if we are in a consensually living, respectful, open relationship.

So the "no repercussions" part makes it not cheating.

sayittentimesfast · 2023-07-25T15:06:09+00:00

An ex shit-tested me once and I kissed her while in a relationship that I wasn't exactly excited about. Broke it off soon after. That was my "big cheat".

My ex said "porn is cheating" so when the marriage went sexless I guess I cheated four times a week.

Now I cheat by staying single.

This one weird trick to not being miserable anymore.

Sell-Chemical7413 · 2023-07-25T23:24:31+00:00

Does CinemaPunditry has any integrity, people?

AbdelBoudria · 2023-07-25T01:01:58+00:00

Men have a more profound love for a woman than women have for a man. So men have a higher chance of staying with their partner even if they can upgrade to get a better-looking woman.

relish5k · 2023-07-25T01:34:21+00:00

I asked this to my husband a while back. He said he would do it if there was a 100% chance I would never find out. So yes, he would go for it if he could get away with it. And presumably only if she was hot! But realistically such a scenario will likely not present itself, so I’m pretty confident that he wouldn’t.

I do think though that he is a bit more loyal than the average man. Maybe the average man would go for a 95% chance of getting away with it.

PatienceOk3159 · 2023-07-25T00:38:58+00:00

You know currently “Yes” but when I was with a girl I was really in love with the answer was “No” Hence why woman propositioned me much harder then

Than now.

Women can generally sense that and go for what seems unavailable.

lowlifedougal · 2023-07-25T01:59:58+00:00

if no consequences….yes

wtknight · 2023-07-25T01:03:25+00:00

would he always take her up on that offer if there were no repercussions?

It's not really cheating if there is not even a "repercussion" of her getting mad about it. It's just a one-sided open relationship, then.

SadEtherealNoob69420 · 2023-07-25T03:13:16+00:00

Yeah there is a high chance I would.

keepturning1 · 2023-07-25T06:06:27+00:00

If you love someone the thought of cheating on them should make you sick. If it doesn’t then you’re not in love with them.

Flightlessbirbz · 2023-07-25T14:10:03+00:00

“Men are only as faithful as their options” is a common saying, and I think it’s mostly true. That being said, I also believe personal values and love and respect for one’s partner also plays a role. Which means that some men with few or unattractive options still cheat, and some men with more or more attractive options don’t.

Tricky_Relief_7152 · 2023-07-25T01:46:21+00:00

No.

Most men honor their agreements.

xItaliax · 2023-07-25T01:09:38+00:00

Would most? Going with no

SeaSquirrel · 2023-07-25T02:38:19+00:00

Why is this question gendered?

Either way, the answer is it depends.

Sea-Lengthiness8846 · 2023-07-25T02:47:13+00:00

Guys at the bar/parties- probably 80% Guys doing errands during the day-probably 25%

I would say it has more to do with outfit/revealing clothing or social settings

bitcoinisbubble · 2023-07-25T03:48:12+00:00

Given that the average American have no idea what they're doing, I.e., 73% are overweight or obese, only 35% have a bachelor's degree, median income is 40k, divorce rate 50%, I can safely assume most would be shitty partners and would cheat given a good opportunity, and this is gender neutral.

However if we're talking about people who actually have their life together, I.e., educated, goes to the gym and stays healthy, knows how to be a good partner, etc, most would not cheat.

Tricky_Relief_7152 · 2023-07-25T01:47:19+00:00

ITT: a lot of women who have been cheated on because they choose the type of men who have no problem with cheating.

If you want a man who is loyal date on your level.

excess_inquisitivity · 2023-07-25T06:42:51+00:00

To me, "if there were no repercussions" includes the condition that my current partner would be unoffended, undisrespected, and with full knowledge would feel just as loving and loved either way.

I mean, if we are in a consensually living, respectful, open relationship.

So the "no repercussions" part, including an unoffended consensual partner, makes it not cheating.

WilliamWyattD · 2023-07-25T08:00:06+00:00

It would matter how hot she is, and the situation, etc. etc.

You can probably get most men to cheat if you give them the right offer at the right time, but some of those offers would be pretty extreme.

Thus percentages are impossible to give as they are contextual to the offer.

John_Oakman · 2023-07-25T10:54:47+00:00

All the relevant men, as the rest of the males who won't are background props. and statistics.

Epiphanic_Eros · 2023-07-25T13:26:23+00:00

I'm quite attractive, charming, enjoy flirting, and live in NYC. I have TONS of opportunities to cheat. I've certainly never done it, though, nor do I expect to in the future.

But my wife and I like to have threesomes and group sex

armonilyss · 2023-07-25T18:59:59+00:00

yes i do think so

TheRedPillRipper · 2023-07-25T01:07:28+00:00

What percentage

As an optimist, and a Christian is like to think it’s not a high percentage. That said sex, with no strings, is very tempting. Especially for an average man. So I’d say it’s 50-50.

hydro908 · 2023-07-25T03:22:11+00:00

It depends on there partner and how they treat there man . If they treat him like a king he’s less likely to cheat but if there not satisfying him sexually and being loyal then some men will cheat

_here_ok · 2023-07-25T03:49:21+00:00

It's a tricky question because anyone would cheat if there are no consequences. I consider hurting my partner a consequence, betraying my morality a consequence and ect. If everyone were to have no conscience then we'll be acting on whatever comes our way. We see a shiny object then we'll touch it, forget the fact it's gonna kill us.

If we were to think of no societal consequence then no. Most men wouldn't cheat. People tend to want to be loyal to their partners out of mutual understanding that they are both possessive. Aka I don't want you with others and you don't want me with others so we won't pursue anyone else but each other.

Fiestygirl000 · 2023-07-25T04:09:53+00:00

Yes! If they could they would.

Cablepussy · 2023-07-25T05:45:21+00:00

INFO:

How many years has she been rejecting any forms of intimacy?

lolthankstinder · 2023-07-25T02:17:38+00:00

Prior to a relationship, what do men and women tend to want and struggle to get? A lot of men tend to want casual sex, and women want an emotional connection.

Within a relationship, what is the definition of cheating? Is it finding an emotional connection with others, or having casual sex with others?

Cheating is defined to penalize men's interest in sex, but a woman could meet and "just be friends with" your replacement all the way up until the divorce and it's totally cool as long as she doesn't touch him. If you try to say anything you would be demonized as "being controlling".

Guilty-Instruction60 · 2023-07-25T00:37:43+00:00

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxGWo82QnHw&ab_channel=MaguireComedyMoments

GoblinModeMedia · 2023-07-25T02:47:29+00:00

As a man I can easily say that, unless we’re in an open relationship, I wouldn’t cheat. I can def be a simp and a dog, but real dogs are loyal. I can’t do someone I love wrong, weather they know it or not. Has nothing to do with my gender, for me.

Diddy_1978 · 2023-07-25T03:48:08+00:00

The same number of men who would steal something if they were sure they can get away with it, I guess.

eye_fuck · 2023-07-25T04:24:53+00:00

evadingbanslol · 2023-07-25T06:11:14+00:00

Mr_Chad_Thunderpenis · 2023-07-25T06:51:27+00:00

Most people are liars and coping or self deluding themselves. If an average guy has an opportunity to easily bang a significantly hotter woman than his wife, in most cases he'd jump at the chance. Luckily that doesn't happen very often, so men don't really cheat, out of a lack of options. And usually most men have higher chances of being able to date a more attractive woman than actually sleeping with one with minimal effort for ONS, so the side chick is most often a downgrade physically wise, which makes the cost/benefit analysis weighing towards the "stay loyal to your wife" side.

AreOut · 2023-07-25T08:02:19+00:00

I had the opportunity but I didn't do it as I am not into hiding anything from my partner. I did leave the not so good relationship for another girl though.

"What percentage of men would always go for it as long as they knew they would get away with it?"

I guess the same as women

beleidigtewurst · 2023-07-25T08:44:59+00:00

If so, would he take her up on that offer even if he was in a relationship?

It depends.

Would it make a difference if she was super hot or not?

Of course.

What percentage of men would always go for it as long as they knew they would get away with it?

I doubt things are any different between genders here.

The only difference would be on what to consider hot, but if we assume "very hot" for both genders, it will likely be the same.

pferden · 2023-07-25T10:08:03+00:00

What time period? Old greeks and romans?

Think_Brilliant3517 · 2023-07-25T10:13:11+00:00

I think the desire might be there depending on the situation but no man who respects his wife would just cheat on her like that

AndyBrown65 · 2023-07-25T11:12:54+00:00

Despite the paranoia, the % would be less than women

daddysgotanew · 2023-07-25T11:22:22+00:00

Most people would in general if the other person is better looking/higher status etc.

spletharg2 · 2023-07-25T12:10:00+00:00

I respect my partner. 2. Getting involved with anyone you don't know is basically playing Russian roulette.

ResidentInternet9113 · 2023-07-25T14:25:22+00:00

I think both sexes are about 50/50 on this. If people think they will get away with it, it’s like the tree falling in the forest, if nobody hears it crash, did it make a sound? People are a mixed bag in regards to loyalty and decency. Sex is irrelevant in my life experiences.

Traditional_Job2467 · 2023-07-25T15:18:53+00:00

Sounds no different when you flip all that as there are cases of push from same gender group where they cheat just as much.

MotleyCrew1989 · 2023-07-25T16:03:45+00:00

Taking my friends group as a sample, its 70/30 in favor of non cheaters.

Hubris1998 · 2023-07-25T16:13:33+00:00

I want to believe I wouldn't go for it but I can't say for sure because I've never been in such a situation. This is because most men don't really have the opportunity to cheat.

childish_badda_bingo · 2023-07-25T17:11:47+00:00

If you have principles, and you choose to honor your word in the world, why cheat? Strange is just another set of private parts doing basically the same things. An orgasm isn’t worth violating how I perceive myself. The issue really has nothing to do with your partner everything to do with how you choose to be with yourself.

Nihi1986 · 2023-07-25T17:50:13+00:00

Not me, though I certainly regret it when I had very clear chances and stayed loyal (considering many of my exes turned out to be cheaters or not so respectful towards me and the relationship).

IIrc, the % of cheating is about the same for both genders (around 20%) but it was lower for women many years ago and has been increasing in recent years.

To the question 'would men cheat if there weren't consequences?' I believe it mostly depends on feelings for the partner. If he's infatuated and in love, it's unlikely. If it's not so much the case and only values could prevent it, then I'd say that without consequences most men would end up cheating. Why? Because a lot of men see women and other people in general as things they can use and not fully respect, and because traditionally men consider themselves more validated the more partners they get. However, I think women are the same and would perhaps cheat less in that situation if they are already getting enough attention and sex in the relationship.

jtinian · 2023-07-25T19:08:38+00:00

If the average man was approached by a woman, would he always take her up on that offer if there were no repercussions?

The key here is 'no repercussions'. Would the average person rob a bank if there were no repercussions? Would the average person do drugs if there were no repercussions? I think the answer is always yes because of how broad 'no repercussions' is.

If so, would he take her up on that offer even if he was in a relationship?

Probably. No repercussions means that his partner will never find out, he won't get any STDs, she won't get pregnant, etc. Very few people in general stick to their morals if they can instantly gratify themselves with no consequences.

What percentage of men would always go for it as long as they knew they would get away with it?

Very interesting question. Such a scenario would be very hard to set up / exist. We know that about 1 in 5 (men and women) cheat on their partner WITH consequences, so the number could only go up from there.

y2kjanelle · 2023-07-25T19:50:41+00:00

No. I mean the men on this sub, absolutely. But the average guy? Probably not. I think most committed men are capable of turning down advances and love their partners.

kirewes · 2023-07-25T22:30:21+00:00

When I was dating I had several times where I could have cheated but I didn't. Me and my ex even we're going through rough patches at that time. I don't cheat I won't cheat and refuse to. I don't give a f*** what the situation is.

Excellent_Badger123 · 2023-07-26T01:03:53+00:00

I had this experiment a long time ago in my first marriage. It was a pragmatic arranged marriage, I cared for him but I wasn’t sexually attracted to him so I gave him 100% express permission to have sex with any other woman he wanted with zero repercussions.
Despite my offer, he never took me up on it.

AidsVictim · 2023-07-26T02:46:15+00:00

Taking movie stars as an example of a group that has an extremely easy time getting laid, there is a lot of cheating that goes on, assumedly more than average, but there are also a ton of guys that stay loyal to their wives even when they're not "looks matched".

Contrastingly some sports leagues are notorious about cheating.

BvHauteville · 2023-07-26T03:31:07+00:00

Never.

It doesn't matter if the entire Victoria's Secret catalogue was willing, one after the other. It wouldn't matter if they paid me.

I hold myself to the same standards that I hold others to and there is nothing I value more than loyalty in a relationship.

It's a matter of ethics more than a matter of opportunity. If you're simply afraid of the consequences, you likely don't understand why such an action is morally wrong and why concealing it, like in this scenario, is an even crueler thing to do to someone you supposedly care for.

Concealing the act strips another person of their agency by potentially keeping them in a relationship they may otherwise wish to leave had they been informed of what transpired.

Depending on how long the lie goes on, someone could make lifechanging decisions such as marriage, purchasing a home, moving halfway across the country, etc. that they otherwise wouldn't have. We're talking about life-ruining repercussions.

How could I possibly think of myself as a good person if I did something I'd consider unforgiveable and potentially life-ruining if the situation was reserved? How could I possibly claim to value and cherish my partner if I was willing to disrespect them and our relationship in such a manner?

No_Length_6997 · 2023-07-26T17:49:50+00:00

Never used to. But now I never miss an opportunity. If you’ve got a good man don’t break him.

ElectronicBoss2845 · 2023-07-27T18:43:46+00:00

I don’t cheat. My gf knows the other women I’m involved with and they know the situation as well.

le_blackpill · 2023-07-27T19:59:19+00:00

I’d feel to guilty if I did that. Repercussions or not

HitEM_wit_da_BOFF · 2023-07-29T20:51:31+00:00

I did it before but it was only for revenge. Before that relationship I had plenty opportunities to cheat but I never did. I know I’m making an excuse but she brought it out of me.

Title	Would most men cheat on their partners if given the chance?
Author	GGMcThroway
Upvotes	37
Comments	349
Date	July 25, 2023 12:27 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/158s89e/would_most_men_cheat_on_their_partners_if_given/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/would-most-men-cheat-on-their-partners-if-given.1226386 https://theredarchive.com/post/1226386

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