Single Father on 4Chan (SFW)

destructoid17 · 2013-06-26T20:04:10+00:00

[permanently deleted]

WorldWarZi · 2013-06-26T19:31:04+00:00

Story related.

My dad won custody of my little sister and I when we were 7 and 12 years old. My sister was enrolled in an elementary school in our neighborhood, and my dad informed the principle of the school that she was not to be released to my mother or any members of her family.

She took it upon herself to watch us like hawks if we were playing in the neighborhood. She would follow us in her car. She would ask me what I was doing every single morning. I was waiting for the bus. Then she would report all of this back to my dad and criticize him, as though he couldn't be trusted to let his kids outside without supervision.

I know she meant well, but her actions started coming off as really condescending and slightly creepy.

felatiodeltoro · 2013-06-26T22:13:38+00:00

Stay at home Dad, here. Once, at a target, my three year old daughter threw a tantrum in the toy section. Same exact thing as the 4chan post. A woman was clearly bothered by the episode and told the security guard at the front. I don't know the whole conversation, but as I was leaving, I heard the guard say. "I'm not doing anything about it. That's his daughter."

She threatened to talk to the manager to have him fired.

I went to the manager to prove it was my daughter. The manager was very apologetic (even though she had no reason to be).

geek180 · 2013-06-27T02:58:31+00:00

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Remerez · 2013-06-27T01:31:10+00:00

I went to a party that had a bunch of kids running around. During a conversation one of the little girls hugs my leg and opens her arms like she wants to be picked up so ofcourse I pick her up and spin her around three times, Holding her out like she is superman flying. I put her down and she runs off only to have the two ladies around me give me strange looks and one of them asks me " are you normal? I mean with kids?". I go what the hell is that susposed to mean? They both apologize afterwards when another mother at the party laughs with me in agreeance to the strange question. It was a knee jerk reaction of them to see a guy my age(23 at the time) playing with a little girl as unnormal. that moment sticks with me as just being odd, I know they meant well but the mom didn't ask any of the unknown women in the party who were playing with kids.

littlekaren · 2013-06-26T21:26:03+00:00

Think about what kind of signal this sends to the child.

If you start crying in public, the police will come and take daddy away.

That's just horrific beyond words.

cheesinator · 2013-06-26T19:40:06+00:00

I want to give that guy a hand shake for being a good person. Taking care of a kid by yourself is hard as fuck; and I don't wish that on any person. Adding sexism onto that just makes matters worse for him.

SoloG · 2013-06-26T19:56:04+00:00

Single dad of 3 here, I know what you mean, every year when I have my kids Bday parties at places and the party organizer etc at the place comes to introduce themselves, they always go to my kids Aunt assuming she is the mom and doing the party.

lordfransie · 2013-06-26T20:23:32+00:00

The biggest contributors to these problems is easily modern television. Watch the biggest shows out there now and tell me how many of them have a male role model. Men are constantly portrayed as idiots who have no idea how to behave and constantly need to be kept in check by a "Strong Woman".

Bobby_Marks · 2013-06-26T21:10:29+00:00

Stay at home dad here.

Yeah it sucks. People assume I am a deadbeat. They assume I'm lazy. Pretty much all of the same ignorant bigotry that lead people to think a woman's place is the home, except feminism has shed light on the latter.

I was refused entry to an stay-at-home mom's group in my town, because I'm not a guy. What surprised me most was that, aside from two women, none of them wanted me there. It must be so fucking hard to be a stay at home mom when everyone tries to tell you it's not a real job, huh? Fuck me.

Men come to the table disadvantaged by our culture and our laws. It makes me very nervous to be a parent in this age.

pdy11366 · 2013-06-27T02:43:25+00:00

Similar deal happened to a friend of mine. Single dad, adopted his son alone. Takes him on a cruise for spring break. Cruise ship employee asks for a letter from the mom for him to get on ship, friend explains there isn't a mom. Cruise guy can't process this and starts giving my friend a hard time, speaking cindescending and treating him rudely. Friend has all the docs the cruise co said he needed to sail. Just wants to get on and show his son the ship. Finally the guy calls his manager over. She immediately sees her employee as in the wrong. Reprimands him in front of my friend and apologizes profusley. Finally has to tell the employee to let it go and let them board. Not a good start, for sure. Kids' safety should he taken seriously,but there is no reason to bea dick to dads.

Daperson420 · 2013-06-27T03:40:46+00:00

CPS = Can't protect shit

IameAuhSomme · 2013-06-26T18:51:16+00:00

And the worst part about this whole predicament is that the women mean well. They would be perfectly sociable, nonparanoid and accepting people if it weren't drilled into their heads that they should "overcome oppressive gender roles". The only reason gender roles are even still around today in general society is that feminism constantly proclaims that it fights them. The only people actively keeping the traditional conceptualizations of gender alive are those trying to make them dead, in the wrong way. You don't fight gender roles by empowering one gender. You fight them by becoming blind to gender, and expecting equality of everyone.

rspix000 · 2013-06-26T23:14:11+00:00

With more than half of the marriages in the US ending in divorce, the administration of a system that tries to determine what is in the "best interests of the child" is going to have problems. It is also going to go through growing pains. It used to be that judges job was easier in making the call. They would most all the time find that the fittest parent was the one with the vagina. Then along comes two career families and social expectations of equality. Oh boy, then the judges actually have to hear detailed evidence with both parents slinging mud (as well as fighting over the silverware) in order to make a custody determination. This delays their "Tee Times" and other recreational activities for them.

Lucky for me that I went through the system in the later times where the judge listened to the evidence. He comes out at the very beginning of the case and tells us both that he is prepared to find that we are both fit parents and that we should both be closely involved in raising our daughter and asked that we both agree to those findings. I say "sure" and my dear ex says "absolutely not". After that, the judges cannon was mostly pointed at my ex and I got primary custody. So guys, come on, "Be the change that you want to see."

because_zelda · 2013-06-27T00:40:37+00:00

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southseattle77 · 2013-06-26T20:00:40+00:00

Ummm... I've been a single father for 7 years since my youngest daughter was 6 months and my oldest daughter was 2. I've NEVER experienced anything like this at all. Ever.

Maybe it's regional? I live in Seattle and am with my daughters on public transportation, at malls, and restaurants around the King County area.

apostre · 2013-06-27T02:44:14+00:00

my niece is 6 now, i have been in her life since she was 2 months old; the father has not been around since that time. my wife and i have helped raise her and her siblings; we are close with my SIL. my niece LOVES super hero movies. Ironman1/2/3, Spider-Man, Thor, Captain America, Avengers, Hulk, Superman etc. You name it, she has seen it at least 3 times. Recently, because she asked me to, I have been taking her to see all the super hero movies that come out. My SIL will buy us matching tshirts, turning my niece's into a dress; we take pictures before we go out, etc. My niece thinks these are the greatest days ever when we go to the movies, get lunch, etc.

I am, and have always been, concerned that eventually a situation like this will happen. I honestly do not know how I will handle it. I would like to think I would be calm, and try to talk through all of it with whatever person, non police, feel the need to make sure I am not a 'bad man'. But I think i will probably just end up losing my shit on them.

Bobwayne17 · 2013-06-26T21:11:35+00:00

I'm a 21 year old single father with a toddling daughter.

Women do NOT make it easy. People from 20-25 don't really care, above that people can get sketchy.

cooltom2006 · 2013-06-26T20:35:11+00:00

I was 28 walking my dog when I learnt not to say hello to little kids asking to pat my dog in the park. "GET AWAY FROM MY CHILD, PEDDO"

zandyman · 2013-06-27T02:04:10+00:00

It happens. All the damn time. I've been solo dadding it for 4 years now, I've been pulled over twice for speeding and had to do a 15 minute story on where her mother is, I've been told that I make the mothers uncomfortable at Mommy and Me tumbling. I've been questioned by well meaning strangers, nosy strangers, and worried strangers. I've been accused of 'loitering' at parks.

You get used to it, you go on with your day.

overtmind · 2013-06-27T01:35:24+00:00

I am a single father. I have never experienced anything like that when I'm out with my daughter. Ever. I am, however, constantly mentally preparing myself for the day it might happen.

no_pants_lance · 2013-06-26T22:56:52+00:00

This is such horseshit, when I was a child my father slapped me across the face and dragged my ass out of a flea market kicking and screaming because I threw a tantrum over not being able to play the video games and no one fucking called the cops on him, people today need to mind their own fucking business.

dog_hair_dinner · 2013-06-26T19:58:53+00:00

I don't know where you all live, but things are NOT like this anywhere I've ever lived or visited within southern Ontario, Canada. Single parents of any gender are greatly respected, because we all know how hard parenting is with two parents. Most often, if a suspectedly single parent IS approached, they are given a glowing, heartfelt compliment that they seem to be wonderful parents.

insanemetal187 · 2013-06-26T21:16:18+00:00

I might need to unsubscribe from this sub. I'm starting to get terrified of being around women. Afraid they'll claim I rape them. Then stuff like this makes me terrified of having a kid.

There's mothers and pedophiles, wonderful world of equality.

blueoak9 · 2013-06-26T18:58:23+00:00

Men who aren't single fathers have the same problem. It's not just women.

Edit: I also want to point out that single mothers have it hard, too. They get a lot of the same treatment, just not from strangers on the street because people tend to assume they have a husband at home. But single moms are constantly asked where the father is, and given odd looks and unwanted advice ("You should start dating! Your child needs a father!" "There are plenty of government programs to help people in your situation. Oh, you have a stable career? You should still look into it since the father isn't around." "You should nail that deadbeat with child support!" etc.)

SnapCrack1ePop · 2013-06-26T21:48:26+00:00

This is seriously bullshit. I guarantee that there are plenty of men that could raise kids just as good, if not better than some women.

Lt_Col_Ingus · 2013-06-26T23:33:14+00:00

It's because of the society we live in. Every show involving a family makes the father out to be some kind of idiot and unable to care for his children. It's fucking pathetic.

2013-06-27T02:33:27+00:00

This sort of thing worries me. Right now, I'm the breadwinner while my wife is in school, but after she graduates and starts working, I'm planning to switch to part time and raise the kid (..that we're waiting to have until I can be a stay at home Dad).

Dislol · 2013-06-27T06:22:24+00:00

Aaand this is why I'm terrified of going anywhere in public alone with my son.

Young dad (23, 3 year old son), covered in tattoos, beard, not all smiles, etc. People are already wary enough of me when I'm by myself, much less when I've got my boy with me. Nevermind that we could have matching metal band shirts on, or he could be covered in temporary tattoos because he wants to look like daddy, nope, I must have kidnapped him.

FinFihlman · 2013-06-27T07:30:33+00:00

Tell them his mother who was also your wife died in a car accident last year and watch them squirm.

major_lugo · 2013-06-27T11:52:46+00:00

Father of twin two year old girls here.

Yep. I get this shit all the time. Any time I'm alone in public with my kids, I get nasty looks from women and rude comments. I hate it.

HugoWeaver · 2013-06-28T07:10:48+00:00

As a single dad with custody, I love the looks I get when I have to take my kids to the parents room in a shopping centre. My kids need to pee or I have to change a nappy or soiled clothes. Fuck me, right? I'm not a pedo. I don't care that you are breastfeeding, I have just as much of a right to be there as all the mums. But I can't begin to tell you the many times I've had a security guard come in and ask me to leave. When I've asked where can I change them? It's always "The male toilets". Because you know, that's a safe and hygienic area to change kids.

blueoak9 · 2013-06-26T19:09:24+00:00

This is all because of Feminism.

Rape Hysteria and The Demonizing of Masculinity.

bentalphanerd · 2013-06-27T00:55:16+00:00

As a single father for 12 of my sons 13 years i can confirm its seriously fucked up.

shadecrawler · 2013-06-27T09:08:37+00:00

as a german i think the good thing about america is, that you could just sue these bitches and cops.
the bad thing would be, that you would probably lose due to the fact you have a penis.
this is what the media makes me believe.

PantheraAtrox · 2013-06-27T10:52:47+00:00

I promise this story will be worth the wait. Well, not really, but I think it's pretty damn hilarious/messed up.

CPS had to do routine visits to our place for quite awhile... it sucked. And it was all because my little brother wanted revenge on my dad. At the time, my brother was 9, almost 10. He was an energetic little fucker, and was always wrestling with my dad. Shit, if I was going to pit them up against eachother for real, my dad would've got his shit wrecked, because my little brother is a beast. I have no idea where he got it from, but he was wired 24/7. Well my dad body slams my brother into the bed in his bedroom, my brother pops back up, and goes to jump on my dad. Now, my dad, he'd always try to act tough for us, but he's really not, haha. And my brother had to have weighed close to 100lbs by now. So my dad catches him, but just barely. My brother is swinging around him like a monkey at this point, loses grip, and falls elbow first into the dressed on the other side of the room. He got a minor bruise. Was hardly even blued. But he promised my dad he would get revenge one day. And he did, man. He did it a week later.

I guess his teachers saw his bruise, and asked him about it. He just replied "oh, my dad and I were just playing around". The teacher continues to ask him how, he explained the situation probably 40 times to her, and then calls CPS. My brother has no idea what's going on really, so when CPS goes to ask him questions, he does not take it seriously one bit. They ask him "What is your dad like?" And he gives a pretty accurate response. Then they ask "What kind of things does your dad do?", to which he replies with: "He jumps up and down on his bed naked sometimes, wears dresses, and paints his nails." He begins laughing. I can only imagine by now CPS either knows they have a shit case and can tell my brother is messing around, or they are sitting there with the jaws dropped to the floor, wondering how fucked up my dad is. So we had CPS come explain to my parents what had happened and they explained everything to the agents and they made a deal that they would check up on us every couple weeks for, I think it was 10 months or something? They ended up only coming about 5 times and then stopped. But man, my parents were so pissed at my brother, and my dad is asking him "WHY DID YOU DO THAT? THAT IS NOT FUNNY". And he just replies with "I told you I would get revenge". I'm really bad at telling stories, but yeah. CPS sucks. Never heard about them rescuing a child before in my life.

j5c077 · 2013-06-27T16:12:21+00:00

as a single dad i wait for the day someone says something like this to me. i will raise absolute hell

PainfulUrine · 2013-06-27T01:12:14+00:00

First question anyone asks when I'm with my son: "where's his mother?"

"Sleeping with her manager from Panera, last I knew."

Make child live not hard me sit it front of tv and put food into top hole of tiny man child.

2013-06-26T21:32:37+00:00

Anon doesn't understand! Ovaries make you the best parent ever! Didn't you guys know!?!

radrler · 2013-06-26T20:16:23+00:00

Um... I was tutoring a little boy (in Israel) and he would sometimes act up in public. Nobody cared. People would sometimes give us warm looks, but that's about it. I think the guy just lives in a shitty town (country?).

It may have helped that I am caucasian and the boy was black...

iMADEthis2post · 2013-06-26T20:08:44+00:00

This one is easily solved guys, every time you see a mother with a child having a tantrum, report it to the police as a child abduction.

Bandit_Queen · 2013-06-26T22:24:52+00:00

I find the aspect of single fatherhood rather attractive - it shows that he's responsible and loving, which calls to my innate maternal instincts, so I react differently when I come across a single father or a guy with his younger sibling/niece/nephew.

pandashuman · 2013-06-26T21:22:25+00:00

that's messed up.

goldenmom1 · 2013-06-26T23:56:52+00:00

Thats discusting. I cant believe this shit happens.

Gennibunni · 2013-06-27T00:45:07+00:00

We are told that it is a woman's place to take care of the child. Thus that makes men look like they can't/shouldn't do it.

thedilf · 2013-06-27T03:51:50+00:00

Sorry Anon as a single dad I totally feel you I've been through cps due to his mother it's absolute hell I hope you get through it with flying colors

StuartSmiles · 2013-06-27T04:16:37+00:00

wow that's kind of depressing

Ding_batman · 2013-06-27T05:53:35+00:00

People also should read this. It is about a case that occurred in Australia last month.

This is an article from a major feminist blog in Australia where they try and justify the calling of police, because he is a man.

LiteweightPhenomenal · 2013-06-27T09:03:21+00:00

What retard places do this kind of shit? I'm not doubting this shit happens but I've never seen idiots react this way just because a man is with their child. I'm assuming it's because I don't live in a part of the US where a majority of the people are morons.

Hateblade · 2013-06-27T11:01:43+00:00

"police were looking for a mother who lost their child"

WTF is this backwards ass shit? I'm pretty sure a mother is capable of reporting her child missing.

At what point do we being applying logic to men's rights issues?

IrideTheDirt · 2013-06-27T21:08:30+00:00

My buddy is, as of recently, a single dad. Even when he was still with his ex, people would act like he had no idea how to raise his son. Amazing how people can comprehend some fathers are actually amazingly good single parents.

Unenjoyed · 2013-06-26T22:58:00+00:00

This never happens to me; quite the opposite actually. I work part time and deal with the house hold business and kiddie activities and such. Maybe part of it is that I'm well past older than the average parent.

I'm still waiting for someone to congratulate me for taking the grand kids out, since I've already received a few unsolicited senior discounts.

geek180 · 2013-06-27T01:14:01+00:00

Does nobody care about the dog in the photo!?? WTF why is nobody asking about that!?

Mojo141 · 2013-06-27T01:54:06+00:00

Single father here. Same story happens to me all the time. Worst was when a friend compared being a single dad to having a disease.

InaccurateLinkFixer · 2013-06-26T22:27:16+00:00

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mandasloth · 2013-06-27T16:18:14+00:00

Agreed, this truly sucks.

felatiodeltoro · 2013-06-27T17:16:05+00:00

I would assume anyone who is actually kidnapping a child wouldn't hang around to talk to a manager.

Also, every parent has a phone full of photos.

turtlehurmit · 2013-07-05T22:23:44+00:00

why the picture? damn man. what does it have to do with you? thats not your dog is it?

2013-09-15T20:28:39+00:00

Those 3589 down votes are a testament to the feminists in this subreddit.

SithLordMikeRich · 2013-06-27T01:55:06+00:00

This is the saddest shit I ever heard!

slippery_people · 2013-06-27T05:10:55+00:00

I highly recommend the movie: The Hunt

(relevant to the topic in this thread)

benmay2112 · 2013-06-27T23:35:15+00:00

Only child of a stay at home dad here. He and I would go grocery shopping a lot together when I was young (like 4-5. I'm 19 now). Women in the store always acted like that. It's shameful. I told my dad about OP's story. He feels validation that he wasn't the only one, let sadness that this type of discrimination is still happening almost 15 years later.

U4IC · 2013-06-27T12:00:38+00:00

As a father of 2 kids i've never had anything like this happen.

anarchists_R_enemies · 2013-06-27T12:08:14+00:00

Was that picture really necessary?

SweepTheSpurs · 2013-06-26T21:00:23+00:00

Meh, kids walking around with their father isn't any more exceptional than kids walking around with their mother here. Probably a cultural difference.

2013-06-26T20:52:37+00:00

Saw this.on 4chan as well. You beat me to it sir.

CACKENBOOLS · 2013-06-26T22:46:07+00:00

Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Just an FYI, I'm not trying to get downvoted. That is their disclaimer reminder. It's in the CSS on top of every page. Makes sense seeing as how you could die of mustard gas trying to make candy crystals if you didn't.

jokoon · 2013-06-26T23:34:39+00:00

/r/MensRights

Jodansan · 2013-06-26T21:33:47+00:00

what do you look like? not that its ok, but my thought was there must be something else plus your gender that is making people assume things about you.

It's not unusual to see men with kids, so I am not understanding this.

EasyPanicButton · 2013-06-27T04:14:17+00:00

To all the guys getting harassed on here, I wouldn't take it personal, it is just shitty that most pedophiles are men, and it just trickles down. Its a lose lose situation, would we rather have people not be watching out for kids or not? Sometimes, something shitty will happen.

I don't understand why the case would still be open, that makes no fucking sense

yeahsam · 2013-06-27T01:02:11+00:00

Feminism works to help stop this. This is not a separate 'men's rights issue'. Assuming women are the natural care-givers hurts women too. It's not right from both sides of the issue.

Basement_duhweller · 2013-06-26T20:17:31+00:00

Is the limp dog pic really necessary?

blarghargh2 · 2013-06-26T20:16:35+00:00

protip: don't get advice on anything from 4chan.

Blacula · 2013-06-26T23:08:41+00:00

Maybe a single father surfing 4-chan in his spare time shouldn't be in charge of taking care of kids anyway.

SenorSpicyBeans · 2013-06-26T19:52:18+00:00

It's 4chan, there's a 99.99999999999999999% chance it's not true.

Move along, people. Nothing to see here.

Title	Single Father on 4Chan (SFW)
Author	twcaiwh
Upvotes	3238
Comments	645
Date	June 26, 2013 6:11 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1h4ftk/single_father_on_4chan_sfw/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/single-father-on-4chan-sfw.1170116 https://theredarchive.com/post/1170116

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