Being alone is better than being in a relstionship we are not excited to be in

Admirable_Elk_965 · 2022-03-04T15:32:03+00:00

I think for your last thing about men being that lonely is for the most part true. They’re willing to do anything it takes to get into a relationship, which is most likely due to them not having had any experiences in high school or college, and probably really are lonely, with friends either busy with their own relationships or just not having friends at all. There’s a difference between willingly being single, and being single unwillingly. The unfortunate truth of it is some guys especially will never get into a relationship no matter how hard they try. Some women too. I think it mostly comes down to if a man is in his 30s or 40s, and has had no luck in life, it doesn’t matter how little chemistry there is, they’re just happy anyone is willing to want to be with them.

Personal experience in my life, in my early high school years I literally had nobody. When I started making friends I latched onto them and refuse to let go. When my friends left for college or church missions or whatever I was super depressed to have to say goodbye to people I loved. Willingly having no one can be fun. But willingly being alone is horrible. Obviously it’s a two way street, both parties have to be interested in each other for a relationship of any sort to happen, and I’m not saying that they should latch on, I’m saying why that’s the case.

escalopes · 2022-03-04T17:10:34+00:00

It's the same for men

But to answer your question: yes, a lot of men are that lonely. Women generally have no idea how lonely men are

I'll point out the end of your post that makes all redpill talking points right lol

AnActualPerson · 2022-03-04T14:58:59+00:00

What excites you? Most men won't be able to afford taking you out on expensive trips sure but men shouldn't simply exist to excite you that's what hobbies are for.

I can hook up, I can date, I can flirt guilt free.

Maybe but that doesn't mean there aren't any consequences.

randodeez54311 · 2022-03-04T12:40:39+00:00

I disagree with the title but agree with a lot of what you say.

I think social media, TV etc has messed up the expectations of what relationships are. It’s rare to find long term couples that are genuinely “excited”. That’s why the phrase “honey moon period” even exists. Part of that long term stability involves habituation which is normal. You learn to appreciate your partner as a person and friend, not just an exciting lover.

I think too many women look for that “spark” or “excitement” without realizing it eventually fades. Good relationships involve effort from both sides. Yes rare situations exist where two people have perfect synergy on every level but more often than not it aint that simple.

At the end of the day tho if women dont believe in anything less than those perfect relationships that’s their business. No one has the right to force you to settle. Just don’t complain about not finding a good man if you keep those standards.

logiauser · 2022-03-04T15:00:36+00:00

Amazing.

Hey don't expect excitement in an LTR, it's not feasible!!!
Being alone is better than being in a LTR that doesn't excite you!!!

kyjolski · 2022-03-04T15:24:36+00:00

It's not that they disagree, it's that they are salty, because:

I can hook up, I can date, I can flirt guilt free.

most men cannot.

I agree that being single is great and preferable to a sub-standard relationship. I'm very honest in my requirements for a potential LTR, don't think it's worth my freedom/effort otherwise, and I don't string people along with false promises at all.

Unfortunately, since I'm not an outgoing Chad, staying single and honest about it basically means being sexless. For someone who likes sex a lot and has very low inhibitions, as well as a liberal/sex-positive outlook, this is extremely annoying. If I had the ability to have no strings attached pussy delivered to my door via Tinder, or just find a FWB every once in a while, it would definitely increase the quality of my singledom. I've got everything else covered already.

So, while the above doesn't change my personal views on the matter, I can understand where the male salt and frustration is coming from.

techr0nin · 2022-03-04T17:14:39+00:00

This attitude isn’t unique to women. Men that can get casual sex and MGTOW men do the exact same thing.

NinjaOfTheSouth · 2022-03-04T13:27:52+00:00

You forgetting men don’t have a plethora of options or can wait for a women to come ask them to be in a relationship.

Most men are just “alone” and willing get in a relationship if it’s bare minimum. Guys can’t fathom this because a lot of them are already alone.

For women this is a different story.

moldovan0731 · 2022-03-04T19:58:20+00:00

Only women and chads can be spoiled enough to think this. Women were the ones who were told more and more often that a relationship must be good/great/amazing 24/7 ever since the sexual revolution.

The guy who wrote this is spot on:

"I think social media, TV etc has messed up the expectations of what relationships are. It’s rare to find long term couples that are genuinely “excited”. That’s why the phrase “honey moon period” even exists. Part of that long term stability involves habituation which is normal. You learn to appreciate your partner as a person and friend, not just an exciting lover.

I think too many women look for that “spark” or “excitement” without realizing it eventually fades. Good relationships involve effort from both sides. Yes rare situations exist where two people have perfect synergy on every level but more often than not it aint that simple."

Impressive_Use_4779 · 2022-03-04T12:20:07+00:00

Are men THAT lonely that they can't fathom the benefits of not being in a shitty, boring, unfulliling relationships over being single?

This is pretty much it tbh.

BluetoothMcGee · 2022-03-04T14:49:22+00:00

As a MGTOW I 1,000% agree with you. The only issue I have is when people get genuinely offended at my commitment to not be in a relationship and try to shame me into getting one, while women are praised for saying the same thing.

PMmeareasontolive · 2022-03-04T16:17:07+00:00

Basic agree, but most women want to be in a relationship at some point, don't they? Women fall in love, or get crushes, or get infatuated, or get fixated on a guy that want to be in a relationship with. That happens, right? Or have women stopped doing that? I know guys get ridiculous crushes, I think women still do too. People dismiss those experiences but I don't, they are indicative of a longing for something. Maybe women experience some kind of relationship early on and decide it's like a carnival ride they've been on a few times; it's not as exciting as it looks.

I wonder if one's early family life has anything to do with one's desire for a relationship later on, ie, if you were loved as a child you might feel more independent as an adult, whereas if you were unsure about your standing or safety as a child you might want someone who represents, ironically enough, freedom from uncertainty, and reassurance that you are, indeed, a person who is capable of being loved.

LowCreddit · 2022-03-04T20:38:35+00:00

I doubt most of you are older, so let me give you guys an idea of what later life looks like.

After schooling, you will enter the workforce and stop developing the deep friendships that children are capable of. Blood brother alliances turn into Buffalo Wild Wing Wednesdays.
Over time, the closer friends you developed in childhood will drift apart for many reasons.
People will start pairing off in earnest in their later 20's. This will peak as women try to cement themselves by 30.
In their 30's, single people and married people will drift apart. It won't be immediate, but it will only go in one direction. Babies will turn parents' focus inward.
By 40, people are separated into forever-alones, singlemothers, dinks, and families. Your place in society has been established and you will be treated accordingly.

You get 20 years to figure this out. Every year you take to figure this out makes your pool of partners shittier and jades you in the process.

I can hook up, I can date, I can flirt guilt free.

You can now, but do you think this is forever? Do you think the quality of men you can get will rise as you age or lower? Are you okay with being some married man's mistress until he replaces you too? Is this what you dreamed of growing up? I doubt it.

There are a small number of people who are so obsessed with something non-human that they consider dealing with anything else to be a distraction. They are a tiny population and almost entirely male.

Az_Ams · 2022-03-04T15:12:39+00:00

I agree. Was married for 10 years and also have had plenty of therapy attempting to fix unfixable relationship.

Classic_Head3437 · 2022-03-04T17:18:04+00:00

There's a metric shit ton of women on the planet. I'm pretty sure you haven't spoken to all of them and don't get to speak for them. Besides, in my experience, people that say they don't want a relationship actually crave it. It's just not happening for them, so they compensate.

Baron_Semedi_ · 2022-03-05T01:00:24+00:00

I'm a guy and i wish more people had this contentment. I feel the same way. I love women but don't need to be in a relationship. I like being single. I feel so free. I can get fwb, and if I don't have one available i get an escort. I wish more would understand that it actually is better being alone than in a unhappy relationship. In a unhappy unsatisfisying one you still feel lonely and pisses you off more knowing someone is so close yet so far.

wylaaa · 2022-03-05T02:36:56+00:00

I can hook up, I can date, I can flirt guilt free.

That is the difference. You aren't alone. Men are.

meisterkraus · 2022-03-04T14:52:59+00:00

When did women become the Borg?

NEOKNlGHT · 2022-03-04T12:57:58+00:00

I agree with the title, but life as a single man is not the same as life as a single woman. As a single woman you get a lot of benefits, like you said. You can spend time with friends, take care of pets, hook up with no strings attached and society will consider you stunning and brave for being single thanks to feminism.

Single men, however, aren't seen as stunning and brave. They're seen as losers and weirdos by society, both by women and by other men alike. A man is instantly seen as more successful and worthy of respect if he has a stable long term relationship or if he's a player, and if he's constantly single and rejected by women, other people look down in them and see them as lesser men. There's a sick double standard going on in society which causes a lot of trouble for many men, which is why they're growing desperate for any female attention.

ColorMePoorly · 2022-03-04T15:14:24+00:00

Yep, it's sad. I think as a whole, women have different problems and struggles than men, and they are all valid. While we are trying to stay safe, men are struggling with loneliness. It's big generalizations, but they are still big struggles.

I've had a man here tell me that he would rather be used than useless, regrading dating and loneliness. It seems crazy to me because I would defenitely prefer to be alone than be used (in a bad relationship).

OmegaBaby · 2022-03-04T13:30:59+00:00

I’m an old gen-x-er. Serious question. Is wanting a family not a thing anymore? Co-habitation has (had?) it’s benefits. Double income meant living in a better place and you had less to worry about if one of you got sick or lost a job. Kids meant watching mini versions of yourself grow into adulthood. Planning vacations and going to exotic places once a year. Regular (if sometimes boring) sex that didn’t have to involve elaborate mating rituals in bars every Friday night. To love someone and be loved by someone. To not be lonely when you are old.

Is that just not a “thing” younger people desire anymore? From this post, I get the impression that’s all meaningless. Not that it’s hard to achieve, but rather it’s not even desirable. What do you envision life at 60 ideally looking like?

Urbanwitch666 · 2022-03-04T15:46:12+00:00

Great post.

I loved being single, it meant I had so much time for friends, family & hobbies. I have a huge family and friendship network, and I am an artist, muscian, performer and nerd with passions for dnd and writing.

I'm now in a 7 year relationship, and it's not because he's the perfect guy. We're financially equal. We share household chores. We are ENM and have been for the entire relationship. We have date night about once a week, only having sex when we are both in the mood. We share a bedroom but only share some of our lives - we are still individuals. In fact I'm going to Mexico for 2 months on my own.

& we plan on having our first child this year.

Idk why so many guys today think women are desperate for relationships or only want rich/super attractive/etc men 😂 I was waiting for someone I clicked with intellectually and creatively, who shares my tastes and passions. Someone with similar goals and desires. Gaf about success or appearance.

RottingVillain666 · 2022-03-04T17:30:21+00:00

Thing is, men have a problem with loneliness, women with safety and a whole set of issues. In ancient societies marriage was arranged and needs meet. Now not.

Diddy_1978 · 2022-03-04T17:46:14+00:00

Not for most guys, who see a relationship as the only way to perpetuate their genes and to have sex on a regular basis.

southass · 2022-03-04T18:22:23+00:00

I feel men project their own loneliness onto women.

Please don't generalize, As someone who has no problems getting dates but its taken a break from relationships after a married woman almost tricked " I didnt know she was married " me into sleeping with her i can tell you not all of us are horny dogs trying to get into your pants or be with you.

Besides the strong FDS vibes of this post i would agree with you and please ladies just like i dont think every married woman is a cheater, dont think that every guy out there is out to get you, Some of us are minding our own business.

Annual_Werewolf_5448 · 2022-03-04T18:32:01+00:00

Very true and this is a lesson I wish I knew in middle school. Even if you’re single and really want a partner never start a relationship with somebody you don’t like. It’s never gonna work out. It’s just gonna hurt you and the other person. It’s always better to be alone than in a loveless relationship. Nobody should be surprised or offended at this statement.

RandomRedditGuy322 · 2022-03-04T19:40:47+00:00

You are describing hypergamy.

You are only attracted and wish to be in relationships with men who are your superior. They will not be attracted to you, and see you as a plain, boring, unremarkable girl just as you see men who are your equal as plain men.

In other words, you do not wish to settle for a man, you wish for a man to settle for you, but for him to never complain about it.

So, hypergamy.

2022-03-05T00:46:50+00:00

Of course it's better to be alone than being with someone just for the sake of being in relationship.

When I broke up with my ex to be alone he couldn't believe I don't have anyone else. He even threated to kill me because "how can I prefer to be alone than with him?!''.

It's been 2,5 year when I'm single and I'm loving in. I just feel free. I can do everything I want whenever I want to do, I spend my money on me,

pillchangedmylife · 2022-03-05T01:38:46+00:00

Most men are low value cubicle slaves who have no identity outside of societies definition of what a Man is supposed to be.

They look for women to be in relationships with so they can be validated as normal by society.

I stopped caring what society thought about me as society already rejected me.

So now I just focus on my work.. my mission. I could care less if i am in a relationship or not.

I could care less if im single forever. As long as i have my work

jamesbwbevis · 2022-03-05T06:25:52+00:00

Smh its because a single woman can still date and get sex, a single man gets nothing. You're basically asking why can't men be happy as virgins.

I agree it makes sense for women to stay alone unless they get someone they want. Just a shame that means way more men will be lonely

chingness · 2022-03-04T14:57:01+00:00

Yes yes yes yes yes yes! I’ve been trying to say this in many of my comments on this sub but never articulated it so well!

I don’t understand why you’d want to share a home/body with someone you don’t absolutely adore!

SmarmyPapsmears · 2022-03-04T13:48:42+00:00

I agree. I wouldn't want to be in a relationship I wasn't completely satisfied with. The issue is: most people don't want to put in the work on themselves (or their partner if they are broken up) to get their desired relationship. Or they're just narcissistic and think they have more value than they do. Usually it's all of the above for people who fall in the "given up" category.

revente · 2022-03-04T13:46:39+00:00

YUP.

Great relationship>being single>mediocre relationship

throwawaythis2020 · 2022-03-04T14:00:08+00:00

Guys only want relationships to get laid. Just say you don’t want to put up with some guys sex drive unless you’re getting something else out of it

Financial_Leave4411 · 2022-03-04T13:23:39+00:00

It’s not so much that they are lonely it’s that they’re horny. Lots of guys would take any relationship just to get laid.

hdksndiisn · 2022-03-04T15:46:19+00:00

As others have pointed out I think you fail to appreciate the experience of being alone for most men as being far different than the experience of being alone for most women. While I personally have never chosen a relationship with someone I didn’t like over being single, and have enjoyed relative ease/success compared to many men when it comes to dating, I have also gone through periods of extreme isolation and loneliness that I don’t believe any woman can understand. Hell, I’ve even been in solitary confinement. While it was only for a short period, it was enough to make me crave any woman’s gentle touch over the cold concrete cube in which I was forced, naked, and bound to be beat by police officers. Not that reality outside of jail is very comparable, I’m sure many men certainly feel like it is. There aren’t a plethora of women waiting in line for most of us, and those women that do frequently pursue us are not ones we would choose with other options available. Men are not rewarded for their singlehood, and often cases are unintentionally punished by society for being alone. I personally think the best solution for most forever-alone men is to do a few things, like you have mentioned - namely focus on improving their lives in every other way besides having a partner - but also seeking arrangements with high class escorts. As their loneliness can be solved with regular paid attractive company. I don’t think men should necessarily even sleep with these women, but use them to bolster their confidence and get accustomed to being around attractive women in the same way most women are used to having access to attractive men.

Regardless, a single woman basically doesn’t need to ever feel alone while a single man often is forced by society to feel alone. And since we’re talking about feelings, that’s ultimately the driving factor in our behavior - if men didn’t feel so alone they wouldn’t be as “pathetic” and “thirsty” in the eyes of their more attractive counterparts.

While money cant buy happiness it can definitely buy company and I think society as a whole needs to make prostitution more acceptable in the same way it lauds women for being independent onlyfans content producers.

My thoughts

Jonesw16 · 2022-03-04T13:33:20+00:00

Having standards only limits your options even further as an average man. By having the bar only an inch above the ground you're shooting yourself in the foot if dating is something you want.

AloneOnTheStrange · 2022-03-04T15:49:29+00:00

A lot of people like to reframe their failures as not really wanting to succeed. A "you can't fire me, I quit" mentality to life. So I'm skeptical of anyone, male or female, that says they actually truly want to be alone.

There are indeed advantages to being single, that must be sacrificed to have a relationship.

There are lots of understandable reasons to fear being in a relationship. Such as past trauma relating to the opposite sex. And I would guess anyone that claims to be happy being alone, or labels themselves as asexual, or sigma, or whatever, is doing so because of these fears. Either that, or they're just making excuses for their failures.

A lot of people are just generally resistant to changing themselves. It requires introspection, which can be quite painful. And may even cause a total breakdown. So if they have neuroses that are keeping them single, they'd rather just stay that way.

prunusamygdalis · 2022-03-04T18:06:10+00:00

BC they want to fuck. They don't care about love or whatever, they want access to easy sex.

Men will marry women they hate.

Smitten_Squire · 2022-03-04T19:28:25+00:00

It is better to be alone than with a shit partner you dont wanna be with.

But dont lose urself and slut around tho just cuz ur single. Cuz all that eventually comes back when you do find someone nice to date.

Emergency-Regret6974 · 2022-03-04T15:56:35+00:00

These men are young and will probably accept their loneliness later in life.

Male dramatics about being miserable single is probably not true for most single men.

ruboyuri · 2022-03-04T16:26:09+00:00

I’m afraid many, many people, of all genders, have not gotten the memo

2022-03-04T18:52:20+00:00

I’m 30F and curious about what you mean when you say you’d rather be single than date an unexciting guy.

1) You’d rather be single now, so that you can enjoy life and give yourself the chance to meet the right guy? (Sort of the, fuck yes or no philosophy of life)

2) You’d rather be single forever than date an unexciting guy (like, that’s just the standard, no matter what)

ApatheticHeretic_101 · 2022-03-04T19:41:14+00:00

So glad I'm a good looking man...I don't have to worry about this...at all. I AM the table.

See how gross that sounds?

LOL

_-One4All-_ · 2022-03-04T20:02:15+00:00

As you approach menopause, you will yearn for the company and support of a man.

WorldNerd12 · 2022-03-04T20:55:01+00:00

I think those kind of men long for a girl they can fuck on a regular basis rather than the other parts of a relationship.

EthicallyIlliterate · 2022-03-04T21:00:35+00:00

People dont agree with this? Lol. Goes for both sexes trust me. At least, smarter guys lol.

We do be getting lonely pretty ez tho 😔 feels man

gopherish · 2022-03-04T21:42:10+00:00

Yes, but that’s not the issue. The issue is that women are spoiling relationships for themselves, leading to dissatisfaction or disinterest.

trail22 · 2022-03-04T22:54:53+00:00

I mean have you ever embraced a single life? I feel liek when women say that , they are thinking of months or a few years in their twenties. I dont think they know what its liek to spend a decade in their thrities being single with no one interested in them. Seeing all their friends get married and have kids. Have them move on no longer having time for you or having anythign in common with you. Making new friends who do the same thing, so you make new friends who do the same thing. In a constant cycle of replacing people in your life with no meaningful contact with anyone as you get older.

souredskittles · 2022-03-04T23:15:44+00:00

They are getting into relationships to get a crumb of sex basically. That’s why they would rather be in a relationship rather than not

pillchangedmylife · 2022-03-05T01:42:02+00:00

How can a Man conquering the world be lonely??

eye_fuck · 2022-03-05T04:16:50+00:00

What was the longest time you've been without any partner since age of 18?

cdcutie88 · 2022-03-05T04:51:57+00:00

Yes, this! After 16 years of marriage, I love being single and NOT in a relationship. The thought of even being in a committed relationship gives me anxiety attacks.

Salt-Seaworthiness91 · 2022-03-05T13:10:22+00:00

I’m 26F and I’ve never been in a relationship. It’s probably mainly due to anxiety, but I’ve always felt what you’ve explained in this post. I would see friends with their bf and be like “oh yeah, he’s great” but in my head I felt like they were just with them because they didn’t want to be alone.

I don’t want to date or have sex with someone I don’t feel attracted to, I’m also an introvert (and possibly autistic or have a personality disorder) so I don’t feel the need to constantly be around people. I also don’t want to get married or have biological children, especially in the US. I guess I’m abnormal, but at least I’m comfortable

fortheloveofquad · 2022-03-05T14:06:43+00:00

Mostly agree. Single is definitely better than a bad relationship. I spent a long time single after first serious boyfriend and I think that was the best possible decision. Bad relationships make being single and working in yourself feel like a gift. After you’ve dealt with an emotional rollercoaster and manipulation for years, you come to appreciate just being able to process your own emotions normally. I grew to love living alone, having my own space, flying to a different city every weekend, working in my career, etc

I’m glad I realised this so that when I met my current boyfriend I really felt like I was choosing him not out of desperation for a relationship, but because he improved my quality of living so much more again, and shared my values, and now I couldn’t imagine life without him.

I think this makes me extremely appreciative of him and very verbal in letting him now how much I value him.

Zaltara_the_Red · 2022-03-04T17:17:36+00:00

As a single, child free female that had a great career owns a home, has interesting hobbies, I don't feel compelled to get into a relationship. I'm happy alone. And if a person (I'm open to any gender as a partner at this point) does not bring more into my life, it doesn't make any sense to date them.

spunkystoic · 2022-03-04T12:52:25+00:00

One trillion percent agree with you OP. I may be an "undesirable" male, but I know that being with someone that I'm not attracted to is 10 times worse.

I also have a feeling that all the snarky, callous comments you see on here towards men would be very differently received were they targeted at unattractive women 😂

Just an example I saw a few weeks ago: "unattractive [GENDER] should just accept their place in the dating market" 👀😂

So many selfish autists on this forum with zero sympathy for the others.

bison5595 · 2022-03-04T14:19:14+00:00

The problem with this entire post is the assumption that you guys are "alone". Now I'll agree that in 2022, more women would rather not be in a relationship with men they perceive as average, but women aren't practicing celibacy, and seem more content with just hooking up or being in situationships with "chads" and "tyrones". I think alot of guys are shocked at the number of women who think they deserve a higher caliber of man and then hear women complain about how all men are trash because they couldn't land some top guy.

Barely-moral · 2022-03-04T13:40:22+00:00

The average woman is lower middle class or poor. The average woman wants kids. The average woman wants enough time to rest to stay sane. The average woman will work oner or two meaningless jobs just to get to the end of the month. The average woman is unable to save enough for retirement on her own. The average woman's family is in the same situation as her and can't help her that much because of it.

That means that sure, a mediocre and boring relationship might be worse than being alone while she is young, her friends have time to spare and she can work and earn... But eventually the woman will hit her 60s and she will end up homeless

Relationship with man we are attracted to>Alone>>>>>>>>>>>being with a plain, boring, unexciting guy just for the sake of itbeing with an unattractive man

Not being homeless >>>>>> being homeless

We are talking about average women. If a woman can earn enough to pay for her retirement on her own or has enough help to live comfortably once she is unable to work then she is no longer average.

New-Context831 · 2022-03-04T13:00:32+00:00

Sounds good, but look into SSRI usage stats and obesity stats, more woman

Look at the rise of self help dating programs for woman now, woman got it all figured out? That's adorable

parahacker · 2022-03-04T13:34:36+00:00

Oh, we believe you, or at least believe that you believe that.

But what it means is that you don't value men for anything other than as tools or conveniences.

You don't care. Oh, maybe in an intellectual way, you hope we can find some pleasant distraction offscreen to keep us happy so we don't bother you, but you don't care if you don't have a man around.

That makes you a tool user. That makes relating to you in any way one sided. That makes you destructive and harmful.

As one person, it's insignificant. You're free to do whatever. But, if you're speaking for your entire gender, then it means essentially that men have been living alongside sociopaths who in the end care nothing for us if it gets in their way.

It is not the empowering statement you think it is.

ZealousidealAd7191 · 2022-03-04T17:36:47+00:00

…do you think men are actually “excited” about their wives they’ve been with for 10+ years after her tits start to sag and shes got crows feet and stretch marks, and she doesn’t even bother to look pretty anymore? You women have completely unrealistic expectations about LTR happiness.

These same women claim they would rather be alone until they get too old and then realize they cant get un-alone as easily.

ImFreeMan · 2022-03-04T17:41:17+00:00

Lmao, I bet OP this is your 2nd account made specifically for PPD, and your primary account is full of FDS bullshit

Having said that, have at it. If this is how you feel DO IT

But in a way you should be aware that hookup culture chads =/= serious relationship brad

So if you got passed around so much by chads that you are unable of having a normal relationship with brad because you get bored. Well then that is a YOU problem. And you are right the best you can do in that situation is being single!!

So I agree with you !!!

Arnold_Incelinator · 2022-03-04T12:48:39+00:00

Going anywhere and to see anyone I like and do what I want.

yeah you summed up the girl experience by this sentence alone. You just want to fuck anyone whenever you want.

I can hook up, I can date, I can flirt guilt free.

LUL, we know you do.

***

Relationship with man we are attracted to>>>Alone>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>being with a plain, boring, unexciting guy just for the sake of it>>>>being with an unattractive man

the reason why you arent getting the relationship with the guy you are ''attracted to'' is because you arent at his level but he will bang you because men dont need to be ''attracted'' to fuck some random chicks.

***

Are men THAT lonely that they can't fathom the benefits of not being in a shitty, boring, unfulliling relationships over being single?

You are only saying boring and unfulfilling because the guys who would be willing to be in a relationship with you are average.

Most people are average and you arent any better than average yourself but you have huge ego because some 7+/10 guy hooked up with you, that doesnt change the fact that he is not willing to commit and here you are deluding yourself by writing multiple paragraphs.

Men dont care about getting perfect girls, Men are way more reasonable than women in terms of rating the opposite gender.

most men have reasonable standards for girls and men do care about personality way more than you do. Most men do accept average girls if they have good personality but all you and girls like you care are pussy tingles, excitiment and all that short term bullshit.

I feel men project their own loneliness onto women.

no, men do not project anything.

Men understand that average guy isnt even remotely close to the amount of options average girl has. We know average girl like you are not lonely because you can go to tinder any time and swipe right on anyone you want and you will be matched.

tinder's swipe data shows women swipe right 5% of the time meanwhile men swipe right 47% of the time. source = https://thebolditalic.com/the-two-worlds-of-tinder-f1c34e800db4

***and because you have infinite options you think like this but men dont have infinite options, most men dont even have any option, this is why men have reasonable standards for dating and this is why most men dont care about finding the 10/10 girl that they are super ''attracted to'' for an exciting fulfilling relationship. Most men want average girl with decent enough personality.

bleb_ploleman · 2022-03-04T14:10:24+00:00

Amen

WeTheNinjas · 2022-03-04T15:09:54+00:00

I agree with most of what you said, however I think the issue here is that average women SHOULD be attracted to average men. There should be some traits that are attractive and exciting in average men, and some that aren’t, since they cancel either out and make the overall package average.

The way you describe the average relationship is very negative. You think the average relationship is going to be “shitty, boring and unfulfilling”? That’s what the below average relationships should be like!!

I agree with another commenter who said that a lot of women are always looking for excitement in a relationship but that excitement is just naturally gonna fade in the long term.

I kinda just think overall the traits you’re associating with average are actually below average traits

furrymacaroni · 2022-03-04T15:52:23+00:00

“Not having to answer to anyone or justify anything.” <~THISSSSSS

Midnightchickover · 2022-03-04T17:22:30+00:00

OP, I know for me, I was voluntarily single for over 4 years, and not really seeking casual sex/hookups. I think I needed that period to clear my head and get myself together, quite bit, which I don't think alot of people do.

Very often, people want someone who can be a steady sex partner/therapist/maid/ATM machine or etc.

I could get my rocks off without other people (I had several toys and etc/self-satisfying). I can cook and clean my own house, just as much as I can make all of my own money and gather my own resources. If I ever gained a partner or spouse, it would be specifically because this person was also a friend/close friend confidant of mine. To me, I cannot fathom marrying someone who was not at least a good friend, someone I wanted to talk to, or want to be around (also more or less a lover as well). IN your words, it has to be something that is fulfilling, not just a "for the sake of." I don't see a point in relationship, if it's not even steady, nor fulfilling or enriching. There's no point, just stay single.

And, lastly me being trans-, it has to be someone that I really trusted or was at least open to my situation or worst understanding.

Buildinsilence · 2022-03-05T00:06:23+00:00

It’s a lot easier for women to say this than men bc women don’t have to do anything to get a new partner but men do

It’s a super selfish way to think & kind of a cop out from having to actually put any work in with anyone

AAh-__DuuuWhot337 · 2022-03-05T02:10:56+00:00

I think the point everyone is missing in this thread is the person you were in the past is not who you are today. We all grow as we age which understandably helps with shifting our ideals & opinions into something you never thought they could be. That is just a part of maturing & growing as a human being. Not one person in this thread can truthfully say they hold the exact same opinions & ideals they had when they were 15. Not one.

I know that I have witnessed Atheist turn to God in their final days, seen siblings fight for 40 years make up in their old age. Saw an aging mother & daughter that abused one another, forgive the other. Felt the love of a dying father as he embraced his once estranged brother & listened as my dying mother asked me to forgive her, just so I would sit with her. People change, People grow, People reflect on what they did & who they were.

You can say today that you don't mind being single, that it's better to do what you want then to give someone an answer. But when your beauty is all gone or when your body cannot sustain what it takes for you to provide. As you sit old & alone thinking of everyone that is gone, dreaming of those who made you feel like you always had a home. I bet then you'll regret saying how much you enjoyed being alone. Spending your last day wishing you just had one person that always called you their own.

AutoModerator · 2022-03-04T12:17:54+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "CMV" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

sarkington · 2022-03-04T15:14:46+00:00

The relationship and abuse subs beg to differ

Wildhouse83 · 2022-03-04T15:53:10+00:00

I appreciate every woman who stays single. More power to you.

H8beingmale · 2022-03-04T18:46:19+00:00

for many people, its good for the relationship practice and experience

ApatheticHeretic_101 · 2022-03-04T19:37:59+00:00

Sounds like you're trying to convince people of your viewpoint. Like a salesman. You don't have to.

No one is pressuring you to date. You said it yourself, if you're happier by yourself and can't find a guy that meets your criteria, better off being alone.

Kudos to you! So...what's the problem? We agree with you: You should stay single. You'll get no argument from us.

Cheers.

juicyjuicery · 2022-03-04T20:08:46+00:00

All of this

Lateralanouncer · 2022-03-04T23:40:09+00:00

What's important is being with someone who shares the same life goals. The issue comes up with modern women, as most have the subjective emotional goal of "happy.".

iwasneverherehaha · 2022-03-05T20:12:16+00:00

No relationship is going to be constant fun.. that kind of thinking is a huge problem with todays generation.. everyone is constantly chasing the butterflies of a new relationship.. the dompimin rush ..

Truth is that shit doesnt last .. aslong as you get on well with your partner have the same life goals , you build a life together and a family.

JoeRMD77 · 2022-03-07T05:26:20+00:00

Another thing to keep in mind is a spark is just a spark. Relationships shouldn't be predicated NOR rely on either.

Title	Being alone is better than being in a relstionship we are not excited to be in
Author	Narrow_Bridge5804
Upvotes	278
Comments	448
Date	March 4, 2022 12:17 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/t6hp9e/being_alone_is_better_than_being_in_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/being-alone-is-better-than-being-in-a-relstionship.1104221 https://theredarchive.com/post/1104221

Comments

You are only saying boring and unfulfilling because the guys who would be willing to be in a relationship with you are average.

Men dont care about getting perfect girls, Men are way more reasonable than women in terms of rating the opposite gender.

no, men do not project anything.