Is it pointless to argue with women about male dating struggles? Why or why not?

gojo_satarou · 2022-06-09T19:33:09+00:00

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RahLyt · 2022-06-09T17:30:15+00:00

It's kinda pointless, first of all women don't have the amount of testosterone men have so they could never relate. For them it's like if I can go 2 years without sex (most don't) so should men. Just check the testimonies when women start testosterone treatment, they almost go crazy.

As a society we see men who struggle as worthless. When I was depressed, I've had an intervention from my family (mostly women) to explain to me how my depression was affecting my mother and I should snap out of it. My point is men are not seen as emotional as women are, the negative side of it is society almost thinks we have no emotions and all of our downfalls come from careful choices we made, theres not a lot of space for nuance.

While is nice to voice your struggles from time to time, there's no benefit in getting approval from some random women on the internet that obviously don't care about you.

Something that stuck from me from TRP even though I don't visit it in like 6 years. "You cannot change the world, but you can change your life.

Society won't change, do what you can to improve your life.

SteveSan82 · 2022-06-09T17:23:55+00:00

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NinjaOfTheSouth · 2022-06-09T17:02:29+00:00

Yes because they do not care. Mainly because they think it’s the same dating experience as theirs.

wonka__vision · 2022-06-09T17:04:31+00:00

Society in general does not care about men's problems. Dating is just one of many areas where men face an uphill battle.

Teflon08191 · 2022-06-09T17:47:07+00:00

For the most part, yes.

Because women's in-group bias is so strong that they tend to unite together to defend their gender from any and all criticisms by any means necessary, with reality often being the first casualty in the process.

smallstarseeker · 2022-06-09T17:41:38+00:00

Mostly pointless.

Most women are here just for entertainment or to shut down any notion of women not being wonderful and guys having any problems.

Weirdly this kind of behavior just reinforces some of those RP truths.

ChibsFilipTelfordd · 2022-06-09T18:33:48+00:00

I find it more frustrating to argue about male dating struggles with men who struggle, due to the vitriol and hatred which encapsulates their views. I get it, everyone gets jaded. But they say you don't teach a fish to fish right? Don't ask a woman how to get women? I agree -- but the same principle applies. Don't ask a failure of a man how to get women, especially women who are attractive and in demand . That's like asking someone who's never caught a fish in his like to go on the Bass Pro Tour

backcourtjester · 2022-06-09T17:36:50+00:00

It is pointless because

A. Its all generalizations and personal experience

B. She can’t change every woman

C. Everything on this sub is pointless and generally pure comedy

Bekiala · 2022-06-09T19:54:53+00:00

I would think many women, specially young women, are pretty overwhelmed with their own problems and consequently not good at responding to men's struggles.

It took me a long time (and the advent of the internet) to get how soul-sucking looking for a partner can be for a man. If a guy had shared their struggles with me when I was in my twenties, I'm pretty sure I would have responded inappropriately as I was immature and not doing well with my own issues.

Of course there are young women who are mature for their age and have the emotional bandwidth to be able to empathize with men's struggles but that wasn't me and sure doesn't seem to be a lot of women.

oflbtbs · 2022-06-09T17:30:38+00:00

Honestly thinking the incoming college freshman... the gender ratios at the colleges will mean that young women will be having dating problems.

iamprosciutto · 2022-06-09T17:33:58+00:00

Yes, it is pretty much pointless if no action is taken to deal with the problems being complained about. In my experience, the hest way to escape a dry spell is to act like you aren't in one. Sex is had with the men who are not desperate for it. Women usually don't want a man who needs them. Instead, they usually want a man who wants them but has everything under control. It boils down to an air of confidence and self-assuredness.

Complaining just makes you look weak and desperate. It's better to lead through action and behavior than words

briiiana1122 · 2022-06-09T18:00:08+00:00

The grievances where men are complaining that they can’t “get sex” do tend to be dismissed, but I’m not sure why anyone would expect otherwise? The way it’s phrased is essentially a statement that the poster is essentially looking for any warm hole to stick their dick into and they want sympathy that women don’t care enough to come running to be that warm hole.

If you see women as just empty shells without value outside of sex (as in all the posts about not caring about anything beyond looks and age) you probably do come across as a misogynist. Not just here, but out in the world. It’s going to impact your dating success.

Snivelingincel · 2022-06-09T17:55:39+00:00

> if you want a hole just call a hooker,

If what you want is shallow casual sex, how is this argument invalid? Unless what you want is the validation that comes from being wanted, in which case, say that instead and we may sympathise more.

ThePleasureIsAllMind · 2022-06-09T18:22:38+00:00

Now now, let’s be fair: nobody cares about the dating struggles of some anonymous schmuck who spends 500 words whining about not getting his dick wet.

That’s what real friends are for. And no, your digital allies in inceldom don’t count because they’re also gonna leave your ass the second they get to touch a girl.

johnnyferrera · 2022-06-09T19:00:06+00:00

Yeah it's pointless. This sub is basically just for venting, which is fine as long as you don't let it contaminate the rest of your life. Just accept dating isn't fair and that you can't argue people out of their feelings. Maximize what you can and go for it.

06534956 · 2022-06-09T17:40:06+00:00

Most people aren’t clear about what they want when they are complaining about something.

When you talk about male dating struggles, what exactly are you wanting from women on here, or in person?

Do you want a solution, to be heard, or some other kind of action? Sympathy, a “there there” coo like a mother does to a baby?

If there’s no call to action, then you’re just screaming into the void. It’s pointless.

pop442 · 2022-06-09T18:30:58+00:00

I mean....what exactly do you want women to say though? I'm no Blue Piller but I've seen women give some solid advice to men who struggled with dating that ended up getting dismissed because of "Muh 80:20 Rule", "Muh AWALT", or "Chad doesn't have to do any of this though."

And, frankly, if the struggling man in question is a pessimistic Black Piller or self-loathing Incel who's already convinced that no advice(especially from women) will improve his dating options, then I can't really blame women for becoming a bit apathetic.

If a struggling man shows signs that he's willing to work on himself and put himself out on the scene though, the responses are usually quite different.

2022-06-09T19:50:01+00:00

Because a woman's point of view of a mans struggle just never registers. It's always going to be an argument about who is the bigger victim.

eekkgg3 · 2022-06-09T23:25:56+00:00

Not pointless, but it can be very difficult. Especially when the topic is online dating, both men and women have trouble understanding the problems of the other side.

Most of my close friends over the years were women, so this is just my experience with discussing this with them. They have a real problem with understanding the discrepancies in how much attention men get in dating vs women, for example. Even my less attractive friends get plenty of attention, both IRL and online, so the idea that a man might go days or weeks without getting real matches on tinder for example, is almost baffling for them.

At the same time, men have a problem with understanding how all that attention can be overwhelming.

These are just two examples I notice come up all the time when I'm discussing dating with my friends. I don't date personally, so this is pretty much just an outside perspective.

anonymousUser1SHIFT · 2022-06-10T07:04:38+00:00

Yes it is absolutely pointless.

My female friend wouldn't believe me how difficult being a guy is. That is until her brother had to call the cops on his gf for her being erratic with a knife, and he was the one that got attested... It was like watching an old lights turn on and slowly warm up.

Moreover a few weeks later a girl slid into her DMS and started flirting with her. However my friend was complaining about how dry the conversation was and how the other girls responses were overly short and not interesting. She pointed it out to me like "oh look at this shitty conversation that can happen". My response was "oh ya, that's basically 9/10 conversation with women online". Since the light was already on from that last event, she got it and just looked disappointed in life.

(Apparently guys tent to provide more engaging and interesting conversations, gee I wonder why.)

just_a_place · 2022-06-09T17:33:20+00:00

Yes it's pointless because they don't wanna hear any whining.

Oli_love90 · 2022-06-09T17:48:46+00:00

It’s been discussed often on this forum. For the most part we get it - so there are no arguments that ya’ll are struggling. But what (I think) lead to arguments about the struggle are: - the crass way in which sometimes people refer to women. We get it, you desire sex but you have to consider the person attached to the act too. - the sense of ease - Rarely is dating easy so to expect that it’ll be easy to find someone based on the idea that you should have someone is a silly way to think. - diminishing women’s dating struggles: again, we get it, it’s hard. But I’ve seen many people on here disregard any struggles women put forth because they’re so caught up in thinking all women have it easy. - the blame game: whenever women make a point they’re completely talked down because a lot of people here completely blame women for their misfortune.

i_have_a_semicolon · 2022-06-09T18:02:15+00:00

I see myself as fairly open minded to men's struggles but like many have mentioned it's difficult when there is inherent disrespect. Ymmv

Hokiie · 2022-06-09T17:27:17+00:00

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Coolio_Street_Racer · 2022-06-09T17:19:38+00:00

No most of them don't give a shit about your struggles. Just like most men don't give a shit about women's struggles.

PlayfulLawyer · 2022-06-09T18:18:40+00:00

Absolutely for the most part anyways, women aren't equipped to handle men's problems, if we're talking specifically dating, the things that you mentioned is the pseudo attempted shaming language they use for struggling guys, they'll even try to shame guys that are successful in doing what they do.

I was so fortunate to see through the lies of feminism back when I was even still a teenager, at the end of the day women don't care about men's problems when it comes to dating, and we shouldn't care about theirs ( unless there's a way you can benefit from it) the people that coexist and get along great, everybody else can do their own thing🤷‍♂️

It's not a dating question but sometimes I get so much push back on here for pointing out that I don't talk to women at work unless I absolutely positively have to and even then everything is going to be documented and doors are going to be left open, etc., your comfort and feeling welcome is not my concern either, especially with that much money on the line FOH 🤣

jasonology09 · 2022-06-10T06:47:28+00:00

It's not pointless, but you have to understand that it's nearly impossible for a woman to fully grasp what it's like to be on the male side of the dating equation, and all that entails: the approaching, the initiative, the rejection, the failed communication, etc, etc. It's much the same as trying to get a person that's always been rich to know what it's like to always have been poor.

All that being said, I think it's more pointless to argue with other men who have been consumed by the "pill" philosophies. They only choose to see their own narratives, and make excuses, even though real life examples refute their own claims. They refuse to accept their own portion of responsibility when it comes to their own lack of success, and see every failure as a confirmation of their already entrenched viewpoint.

Valuable-Marzipan761 · 2022-06-09T18:43:22+00:00

it's kind of pointless from both sides. women can't understand what dating is like for a man, but most men on here are equally dismissive of opposing views from other men. especially if a man suggests the dating world isn't completely bleak for any man that isn't a 6'5" millionaire.

flapperfemmefatale · 2022-06-09T17:37:30+00:00

If a peer were to complain, I’d listen and help. But my (and my friends’) desires are completely at odds with most disenfranchised men’s agendas.

A recent thread complained about women’s response to approaching, and he immediately devolved into referring to women as bitches. And that’s more common than not; RP men appear to actively despise women. I am not remotely interested in making access to women easier for men like this.

wtknight · 2022-06-09T17:45:44+00:00

All men need to do is frame it in terms of love. When I was young an single I was upset that I didn’t have a girlfriend like other guys, not so much that I wasn’t having sex. Women who are pumped and dumped or ghosted after sex by men have the same struggles, so I think that some women would be more sympathetic then.

LillthOfBabylon · 2022-06-09T22:14:23+00:00

I mean it seems incredibly annoying and futile to have to defend yourself every single post to tell women that hey I might not have as much dating success

Because you guys rarely write "I am sad that I am lonely". It's typically "How dare women not fuck me?! Why are they stuck up and don't recognize how amazing I am!? This is why men commit mass shootings!"

Have you noticed the overwhelming since of dismissal to most male dating problems as a whole.

My guy friends also dismiss it too, because they have bigger issues than wondering whose hole they'll stick their dicks in.

If a guy complains about not being able to have sex...well there's a disconnect.

For one, alot of people are dealing with a shitty economy, so if his only problem is no pussy, he's very privilege.

Sure-Vermicelli4369 · 2022-06-09T18:12:17+00:00

Of course. Women don't have a fucking clue what it's like to date women. Think of how many bisexual women exclusively date men. Why is that?

Confident_Spinach967 · 2022-06-09T20:56:38+00:00

Depends. Nobody likes a whiner and some of these people ( both men and women) complain about the stupidest and most pathetic things about dating ( See incels and female dating strategy)

That said, Dating is tough and everybody wants a simple solution to complex issues so it’s always gonna be a shit storm. ( good example of this is weight loss advice- everybody’s looking for an easy way to get healthy without putting in the work long term)

mcove97 · 2022-06-09T23:02:38+00:00

I'm willing to listen to the issues men have, if they're willing to listen to the advice or solution I have to offer and don't make excuses for why they can't do something.

But how do you expect a guy to act when it's something he can't get easily?

If you want something in life you can't easily get, you have to work for it, and sometimes work hard. I expect guys to acknowledge that they have to put in the work that makes them attractive to women, be that making changes to physical appearance, working on mental health issues, improving attitude to being more positive and optimistic etc.

Or when a guy complains that he can't get results from women. And he's tired of the chase.

Take a break from chasing and focus on yourself. Focus on your own mental and physical health and well being and pursue other things that make you happy that isn't as hard to get.

You can't control what women do. You can control what you do. Blaming women isn't going to empower you. Taking personal responsibility over your own dating life can and will.

Wide-Illustrator2906 · 2022-06-10T01:49:02+00:00

It's pointless to argue with women in general. Men and women in general live different lives and have different viewpoints that are directly tied to their sex.

The most men and women can do is to monitor each other's behavior and adjust your own behavior to better achieve your personal goals in dating.

giddy-girly-banana · 2022-06-10T01:51:39+00:00

Most people struggle to find good dates. Attractive people tend to struggle less.

MetaCognitio · 2022-06-10T09:34:47+00:00

It’s pointless arguing with anyone about your struggles. You can talk to women and let them know the truth. You can even debate them about the garbage men go through. The ones that get it have some empathy towards men.

Arguing with them is pointless. If they don’t want to accept it and are in the “women are always the victim even when they have the upper hand” mode, they will never see you’re sure. They refuse to.

Frailiul · 2022-06-10T12:38:39+00:00

I mean, It kind of is pointless most of the time. They just can't relate

Ilarva · 2022-06-09T17:35:33+00:00

i would argue that it’s impossible to properly argue, at least on this sub. it’s an echo chamber, and even though it pretends to be a neutral sub i’d say that it’s very much RP dominant with a few people like me that are here to amuse themselves and we end up dehumanizing each other for fun cause, let’s be honest now, really, we are on this sub to either create an echo chamber or to stir some argument for fun to solidify our already existing confirmation biases.

maybe irl people here would be more receptive in the absence of being presented with a flair containing their and the others beliefs. it’s pointless. RP people or RP leaners will not change their minds lmao and im sure as hell that neither will i change mine towards RP or sth like that. so yeah =))))))))) sad

MickIsBlue · 2022-06-09T18:03:38+00:00

Largely pointless, women have an enormous in-group bias, 400% greater than men's. It's obviously biological in nature, you are just slamming your head into that whenever you argue this or several other points with a woman. Her evaluation of you, your efforts, your worthiness etc is just so much less generous than what she extends to herself and to other women that she'll always see you as the cause of your own, easily-fixed-if-you'd-just-stop-being-such-a-lazy-loser, problems. There is no getting around this, you're basically just hoping that you're dealing with one of the extreme outliers who has a low (for a woman) in group bias.

I say all that as someone who has argued this point many times, and continues to do so. If I'm honest I do see it as basically fruitless.

Lift_and_Lurk · 2022-06-09T17:19:56+00:00

Let’s be objectively real. It’s still the minority of men struggling, and a lot of dudes aren’t actually doing a lot of common sense shit- and are arguing against it even tho some things they should be doing just to be doing it: not just cause it will get them laid.

social_mule · 2022-06-09T17:33:05+00:00

It's pointless to argue with women about anything. That great American philosopher Chris Rock does a comedy bit about it.

Sdp2036 · 2022-06-09T18:01:53+00:00

Women will never know what it feels like to be a man and vice versa so its pointless to try to get women to understand when they just dont care and see men who can't get laid as losers hell they probably enjoy seeing those men struggle.

2022-06-09T17:35:41+00:00

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Ex_Machina_1 · 2022-06-09T19:42:11+00:00

While men on here are complaining they dont get sex, women are complaining about being raped, sexually assaulted, and being subjected to laws that work against them (anti abortion, etc.). You cant really think that not being able to get sex/partner is the worse thing in the world, when women have far more pressing matters to give discussion to.

SouthernGrass3 · 2022-06-09T21:48:56+00:00

I think its a sore spot, because, for a lot of men who arent sexually successful, having sexual access to then women they want, would come at the cost of those women having sex that they find unpleasant—- and we made women do this for a massive chuck of history (and they had to deal with unpleasant financial and social pressure and perception of inferiority that were intentionally amplied to make women pair up).

Trick-Kooky · 2022-06-09T17:19:57+00:00

People in general have problem with all sorts of things. Generally people sympathize more with people who have similar problems as they can relate to them.

Your OP is an example of this. You have arbitrarily chosen a subset of people (men) and a dimension of their problems (dating) that another subset (women) can't relate to.

The same principle rings true for a subset of people (glass-wearers) with a problem of sight that most people with good sight don't give a shit about.

Or to match your level of sexistic topic, Subset 1: women Problem: Rape, sexual harassments Subset 2: Men

Deranged_Loner · 2022-06-09T17:53:03+00:00

I think it's meaningless because it changes nothing.

Dating won't change because a woman knows a man's dating struggles.

2022-06-09T19:26:29+00:00

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hsvgamer199 · 2022-06-09T20:21:07+00:00

Yeah it's probably pointless to ask for empathy. I don't bitch a whole lot in real life cause no one likes complainers. I do that here so i don't bother anyone in real life.

Dating is emotionally exhausting for other men and me but no one cares. Life is inherently unfair for most people though. From personal experience, life in general sucks less the more money that you have. I focus most of my energy accordingly.

ruboyuri · 2022-06-09T20:28:05+00:00

Yes

Because relationships are voluntary

Either we can choose or we can’t

AelfredRex · 2022-06-09T20:50:53+00:00

No one is entitled to the sexual attention of others. Crying about it to get them to pity you and give you that attention is exploitation. So don't be surprised when they look down on you for trying that kind of sympathy manipulation.

sunkized · 2022-06-09T20:54:51+00:00

As a woman I can tell you it's a waste of time.

memelordzarif · 2022-06-09T21:10:13+00:00

Well it’s mostly pointless af. There are a few reasons for that. A random woman on the internet won’t sympathize with you specially if you are a man because they tend to generalize that all men are creeps and all of them are just trying to get casual sex from woman, a hole to put their dick in UNLESS you are a chad, an attractive 10/10 male. Then regardless of your beliefs they’ll sympathize with you and try to get your dick. That’s a double standard. Look if you judge a man by his beliefs, judge all the men by their beliefs or if you judge a man by his looks ( it’s not necessarily fair ) then judge all the man by their looks. You can’t just call a man a creep because he looks less attractive, sometimes even average or above average and then flirt and have sex with them if they are a ‘chad’ . Women inherently tend to think that men are losers and all the men are creeps and just want sex. They get all the attention even if they are below average. But an average man will get his fair share of rejections just because he ain’t a woman. As women grow up with all the attention in the world, they have a lot of options to chose from when it comes to dating whereas men don’t have that luxury. So they can’t relate with men’s dating struggles. Just because of some men turning out to be creeps and wanting sex, the good men don’t get sympathy. Women generalize all the men. However I do agree that it’s men’s fault in a way for giving women too much attention so they don’t have to struggle to find a partner or even casual sex. But the actual good men deserve sympathy which we don’t get. I don’t think the society won’t change its views anytime soon so we’ve to deal with it for now. So to all the men including me who struggle with dating out there, just talk to other men who share the same hardships. Or go to your friends like I do. I have female friends who actually sympathize with me because they know how I am, not a creep. So they can relate and are pretty understanding. Don’t look for sympathy from online strangers who don’t even know your situation and can’t relate to your dating struggles.

Pr1nceCharming_ · 2022-06-10T01:56:23+00:00

It’s pointless to argue with women about anything

blue_eyes18 · 2022-06-10T02:19:50+00:00

I ended up essentially on a “why are men this way” rabbit hole a year or so ago and stumbled across this video.

She makes some good points about how society is currently treating men and why there’s such an identity and mental health crisis when you essentially tell half your population that you don’t need them and that in order to be someone in society, they have to be “someone” to a partner.

deez941 · 2022-06-10T02:34:23+00:00

“But how do you expect a guy to act when it’s something he can’t get easily?”

If your end all be all is sex, you will surely fail more times than succeed.

I think something that would be beneficial is to be more expressive of the things your into when you meet other people. It will make you seem interesting. And if those people don’t find you interesting? Oh well, their loss. Move on and try again.

No_Regular1586 · 2022-06-10T03:52:47+00:00

Women don't care about your struggles. They care about results. You don't perform, they don't fuck you. Get to dancing you fuzzy little monkey.

Icy-Wallaby4326 · 2022-06-10T07:03:38+00:00

Women have empathy but not for men dating struggles. Other men get it but women don’t, never will get it.

So it’s useless and weak to argue let alone talk women about it. Very select few will get it, the other 90% will be judgmental or jealous.

roguish_rogue · 2022-06-10T07:49:18+00:00

Argue yes, whats the point? I have had plenty of conversations with my girlfriend about various aspects of intersexual dynamics, its good conversation topics especially over a few bottles of wine, its not me trying to "red pill" her or anything though, its just interesting conversation.

MickIsBlue · 2022-06-09T16:57:47+00:00

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nothatyoucare · 2022-06-09T18:17:45+00:00

Dating struggles between men and women are a lot like the effects of wealth inequality and all the problems that causes for society but women can't bare the thought of them having advantage in one aspect of life since so much of their ideas is built on the ideas that women are perpetual victims. For them to acknowledge a class advantage would shatter their world view.

You can kind of get hints at this when black women, who still hold advantages in dating over men in general, don't have it as easy as white women and start to complain. They get mad that men don't approach them in the numbers that they approach white women, etc. Keep in mind neither of them are expected to do what men classically had to do which is play the numbers game and approach approach approach and not taking rejection personally, even though the odds would be better in their favor if they did. My gen x brother would tell me when him and his friends would go to some place and have a goal of talking to 20 to 30 women that day with expectation of having ~10% success rate.

The value of PPD though is to understand how women deal with logic and disagreements. Dealing with some of the strawmen and wild takes women will take in order to not cede a point better prepares me if the conversations happen around me IRL. Plus I can mentally practice against women just making ludicrous claims so they won't be wrong. Plus the studies that have been linked here that I wouldn't have found on my own is another source of knowledge.

hightailed · 2022-06-09T17:42:05+00:00

100% yes. It’s like talking to my white friends about the every day things I deal with being a poc. Or a person born in poverty trying to explain what it’s like coming from nothing to a trust fund baby. Or even the fears a woman has walking alone at night to a 6’4 dude etc.

It is a little frustrating that women seem incapable of seeing the other side of the coin, but I’ve found part of being a man is just accepting it and getting better. Cause no one gives a shit if you fail. You’re just a failure

No-Priority7869 · 2022-06-09T18:22:46+00:00

Yes, it’s pointless. Women don’t care, nor should they.

that_cat_gets_me · 2022-06-09T18:07:05+00:00

Very pointless. Reason. Male fragility.

There are the select few who truly want to learn and do better, but the majority just fall into the mediocre male category, then are the victim to their own minds.

MickIsBlue · 2022-06-09T19:39:37+00:00

It's a complete waste of time and shows your in the wrong frame of mind to have a woman.

badsign12 · 2022-06-09T19:22:47+00:00

-Arguing at all isn't terribly effective. People seldom change their minds.

-Arguing with someone with a genuinely different perspective makes a tough task tougher.

-Arguing in bad faith, which is often the path men take here, makes the tougher task the toughest.

flapperfemmefatale · 2022-06-09T17:52:50+00:00

I can't sympathize with anyone who seems to have a fucked up grasp of reality. So if your struggles are founded on that, you'll need to find someone who shares your mindset.

MelodiousTones · 2022-06-09T17:15:01+00:00

Yes misogyny is your problem. So long as you continue to treat interactions with women as attempts to “get” what you want from them, so long as you continue to objectify and generalize negatively about women, you will not get any sympathy. You need to change.

Ou-tis · 2022-06-09T18:04:45+00:00

Because women don't care about men. Because vagina tingles care even less.

2022-06-09T19:24:58+00:00

Of course. Women have no idea what the average man goes through. An average man will never get the flurry of attention that women get.

Forgottenshadowed · 2022-06-09T23:38:31+00:00

Yes.

You're never good enough for women, you're just not.

Unless you're an abusive, assaultive guy, then they don't care about you.

Sliw · 2022-06-10T01:13:34+00:00

Is it pointless to argue with women about male dating struggles?

Is it pointless to argue with women?

Is it pointless to argue?

Yes. You're supposed to have better shit to do. Focus on your mission. If you don't have one, finding one is the mission.

_Oh_Be_Nice_ · 2022-06-10T02:07:41+00:00

(Most) women can’t own their own bias here because it would require they admit to possessing an inherent trait that is less than virtuous, which they will never ever do.

The more women convince themselves that they are perpetual victims at the hands of all men, the easier it is to not only dehumanize men, but to feel justified in dismissing any and every issue an individual man may face.

Once women have sufficiently convinced themselves that all men are inherently guilty of some imagined cruelty towards them, it becomes very easy for them to lie, cheat and steal from a man with no guilt whatsoever. Conversely, it becomes impossible to empathize or sympathize with them.

"All men bad, all the time, everywhere," is the plutocrat's party-line for a reason. It delegitimizes agency for young men, ensnaring them in the pertpetual psychological bondage of the sins of their forefathers, but ironically, it also infantilizes women and absolves them of agency and accountability.

This is why the gender war is a proxy for the only war that's ever mattered: the class war.

The_FatGuy_Strangler · 2022-06-09T18:02:17+00:00

Go out in public… to Walmart, to the grocery store, the mall, a sporting event, the movies, or a park… TONS of average and below-average looking men are with a woman who is roughly their looks-equivalent. This means women do date, have sex with, and end up with normal average guys because, well, they’re average looking too! In fact this IS the norm, it’s literally everywhere. The men who complain are probably below average looking who are aiming way out of their league, or they’re socially retarded. You can disagree all you want, but just step outside your door and go out in public, average guys are doing fine. So yes, it is pointless to argue with women on these things… they have no incentive to care about men’s dating issues.

MarjieJ98354 · 2022-06-09T18:13:13+00:00

It is absolutely pointless, depending on what you want to achieve.

If you just want to waste time / argue on the internet, knock yourself out. It's the internet. No one cares. Not only no one cares, everyone is here to try to make other people's lives a little bit more miserable, for fun.

If you want to bang someone, dude. Shut the fuck up. You are supposed to be fun, sexy and mentally stimulating. No one wants to sit down trying to solve societies problems as a warm up to sucking each other's bits.

And at the end of the day, you don't have to defend shit. You don't have to justify anything to anyone in this place. No one is going close the browser and run to suck your dick the moment you open the door because you posted something interesting.

Slight_Fig5187 · 2022-06-10T07:01:02+00:00

Well, if you read the comments for example to this post of yours, you'll see most men in this thread want you to accept the idea that there's no point in having any kind of meaningful dialogue with the other 50% of mankind, even though you're very interested in connecting with them, which makes no sense whatsoever.

If you were a company trying to sell a product, you'd be very interested in knowing what your target costumers thought about your product. You wouldn't be listening all day to other failing companies who were also unable to sell theirs, just to whine and post hateful things online about your target customers.

There's excellent advice from women, also excellent advice from men who are not into the self destructive nihilism of red and black pill groups. For example, I just finished a book called "Toxic Masculinity" by professor Stephen Whitehead which has many good pointers for men trying to improve themselves.

rosephase · 2022-06-09T17:05:15+00:00

The issue is if they are actually a misogynist. Men struggling with dating get a lot of support on other subs. On this sub? Men struggling with dating are Red Pilled or Black pilled and therefore have major issues with misogyny.

There are plenty of men who get support and struggle with dating and don't turn it into a world view of AWALT and 20/80 and "women are the oldest teenagers in the room". And when men do that they need to address their misogyny before they have any chance of finding a mutual sexual or romantic connection.

Misogyny is being addressed because it's the main issue.

techr0nin · 2022-06-09T17:39:45+00:00

Is it pointless to argue? Maybe, maybe not, depending on whether it is an intellectually honest exchange. But it is definitely pointless to whine about your dating problems to women. They do not give AF — if you can’t get none as you are, they’d rather you be out of the gene pool altogether.

MarjieJ98354 · 2022-06-09T18:38:46+00:00

They should rename this sub, "Same Shit Different Day"!!

gopher_glitz · 2022-06-09T18:40:31+00:00

Nobody's coming, nobody cares.

jawnzoo · 2022-06-09T19:56:54+00:00

honestly, it's pointless to argue about most dating struggles, since most people here just like to complain and refuse to question their own perspective (confirmation bias is fucking crazy here)

we all come from different backgrounds/experiences and the world isn't black/white

what might be a struggle to some, is an easy task for others depending on a lot of factors.

anyone that generalizes people by gender is usually describing what happens in their own life

ex_red_black_piller · 2022-06-09T21:48:01+00:00

Yes it's pointless. They have the upper hand, why should they care?

Men are stupid to be expecting solutions from women. Band together to change things, or stfu.

2022-06-09T23:00:11+00:00

Why do women only want a man who has enough money to improve her life? To them, if you don't you're just a "LVM scrote." So, they can have their basic standards but men can't?

If you still want to date then, by the means of all that is holy, find a simple woman. They're easy to weed out based on makeup, clothing, car they drive, and attitude. If they can't cook that's a red flag. Not because I can't cook for myself. It means they've never had to and have always had someone do it for them or they eat out every meal (have someone else do it for them).

Cooking is a huge test of a woman's value IMO.

HumanSockPuppet · 2022-06-09T19:42:58+00:00

It's pointless for the following reasons:

No one gives a shit about men's problems.
If you want to change a woman's mind, you have to change her feelings. You accomplish this with actions, not with arguments.

Women bitch. Men get shit done.

OneComfortable3508 · 2022-06-10T13:07:06+00:00

Even if a woman finally says “yeah, you have it harder”, what’s your win? Her pity? Validation? Lol. Ask yourself how attractive it is for guys seeking these things?

Women never wanted or needed to hear your struggles. Quit bad guying them for it. Your boss doesn’t want to hear your struggles. Your friends and family to a degree, don’t want to hear your struggles. Why would they? Have people not figured this out?

No woman is looking for a “solid argument” on the matter either. Quit kidding yourself with stuff that doesn’t matter.

If a guy’s gig is getting caught up in the “we have it harder” stance, I promise there are a dozen other things he’s doing wrong that accompany that type of living/thinking/acting that are making him “have it harder”.

TheCultOfGrogg · 2022-06-09T20:08:14+00:00

Yes. Women don’t care. Much like a dwarf telling you about her dating struggles. The best she’ll get is “I’m so sorry for you”…and you may genuinely be, but that won’t compel you to go out and date a dwarf… so in essence, what good did her alerting you of her struggles do unless it served as some kind of cathartic rant for her?

Women are very much the same. There was a time when most women desired most men because women couldn’t work/ no that they can provide what the average man can provide, they want top-shelf men with regard to earning ($200k+). She typically looks for this guy wrapped in the tall (6’4+), hot (9 or 10), muscular physique (220lbs - 260) women have craved primordially. If she can’t get both in one guy, she’ll typically marry the first and cheat with the second, or have a kid by the second and hope to marry the first (as modern women currently do). This is how they move, this is how they think, and it’s it changing.

I think a lot of guys are looking to be proven that women aren’t what they appear to be…but the truth is, it’s not going to happen. When you look at dating, stats, and all else, it’s pretty pro Red Pill. It’s not that Red Pillers are wrong, it’s just that no one cares enough that you’re right to change anything.

lilzt · 2022-06-09T20:31:38+00:00

Its like a child being born rich and being silver spooned all their life and majority of women here think men that complain about the current dating market and how rigged it is. is seen as whining or this or that. Women dont understand man. an unattractive women is far off getting into a relationship or ONS than an unattractive man or even an average man on any dating app.

2022-06-09T20:32:22+00:00

I keep seeing this bullshit narrative that men complain on here...

I'd like to point out

Women complain just as much on here as men, there are just more men then women on reddit, so its not that men do it more per 1000 men lets say, its just the higher ratio of men
The internet is one of the few places where men can come here say something anonymously or closest thing to, and therefore its one of the few remaining places where men can be honest without getting socially fucked.

Talking about issues and complaining are 2 different things.

From personal experience, only 10% or less of women actually empathize with men, the rest don't give a shit, and more often then not, you can't have an honest discussion because they often belittle, minimize, ridicule what you say or just completely twist it, and say you said X, when you never did. So i'd say its largely pointless.

Title	Is it pointless to argue with women about male dating struggles? Why or why not?
Author	MickIsBlue
Upvotes	191
Comments	477
Date	June 9, 2022 4:52 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/v8l80x/is_it_pointless_to_argue_with_women_about_male/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/is-it-pointless-to-argue-with-women-about-male.1209623 https://theredarchive.com/post/1209623

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